rSlash - r/Bestof Wife Wants to Add Her Girlfriend into Our Marriage

Episode Date: April 10, 2025

0:00 Intro 0:11 Temu 5:24 Refusing divorce 13:00 Princess syndrome Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Okay, flights on Air Canada. How about Prague? Ooh, Paris. Those gardens. Gardens. Um, Amsterdam. Tulip Festival. I see your festival and raise you a carnival in Venice. Or Bermuda has carnaval. Ooh, colorful. You want colorful. Thailand. Lantern Festival. Boom. Book it. Um, how did we get to Thailand from Prague?

Oh, right. Prague. Oh, boy. Choose from a world of destinations. If you can. Air Canada. Nice travels. Welcome to r slash best of redditor updates, where OP's fiance gives her a $38 Teemu engagement ring. Our next Reddit post comes from r slash amithabuthole.

Am I the butthole for telling my fiance that I don't want my Teemu engagement ring? I'm a 27 year old woman and my fiance is 29. He proposed to me a few weeks ago. It caught me completely by surprise, but we've been together for three years and things have been going great. So I was really excited and said yes. I really liked the ring when I first saw it and my friends and family all think that it's stunning. It's an oval cut with diamonds across the band. I asked where he got it and he wouldn't tell me where, but that he got a great deal on it. I didn't think anything of it until yesterday.

We were in the bed and I asked him if it was diamonds or moissanite mainly out of curiosity. I don't have a preference by the way. He said he didn't know and he would have to look it up. When I glanced over at his phone, he was on the Tmoo app. I asked him if he got it from Tmoo and he didn't respond. So I asked again and he responded with something like, does it matter? And left the room and ended up sleeping on the couch. I spent all night so confused. Today, I decided to download the app and look at my ring and I found one that looks identical. I found the exact ring listed at $38. I'm mad!

He makes good money! $200,000 a year. And I feel like he could have shelled out some money for a ring better than one on Tmoo. Am I the butthole for telling him I don't want it?" Then, six hours later, OP posted an update. After reading responses from my post, I was freaking out a bit. He came home while I was FaceTiming a friend about this. I hung up with her and then talked to him for an hour or so. He apologized for sleeping on the couch and that he needed time to think. He doesn't see eye to eye with me on my concerns about the ring and says he did research and that it was highly rated.. He doesn't see eye to eye with me on my concerns about the ring

and says he did research and that it was highly rated. He says if the ring breaks, he'll replace it, but didn't say that it would be higher quality. I have people messaging me that the ring could be harmful to my health and that Timu has horrible standards for their jewelry and labor issues. So now I really don't want to wear it." He left and went to his brother's house. Usually I'd go with him, but things are just tense. Then one day later, OP posted an update. He came home this morning while I was in a work from home meeting. These comments made my head spin all night. I got like three hours of sleep, so I admit I may be in the wrong for bringing up his finances, but I did. And as for the accusations of me being a gold digger when we met

I was making more than him and often paid for his things his high-paying job is a recent development I have my own money and don't need his I asked him what was going on if there was anything He needed to tell me if he was testing me by doing this, well, that really set him off. What kind of person do you think I am? You think I'm a cheapskate? A liar? You obviously think really poorly of me.

But he still never gave me a reason. So I asked why he was deflecting every question to victimize himself and to avoid my questions. He tried to leave again. So I tried deescalating and told him I see where he's coming from, but I need to know if he still loves me. He was immediately apologetic and still wants to get married. He said that I can just pick my ring out and buy it with my own money. He said that he's sick of talking about this and it's water under the bridge now.

He's acting like his normal self again since this conversation. I hear him out there skipping around and humming to himself all happily, and it's actually pissing me off. Maybe I'm being dramatic, but I don't think I can handle a marriage with someone like this. You know what this reminds me of? I just, okay, I really like trashy reality TV. And I just recently watched the newest season of Temptation Island

And if you don't know the basic premise is a couple comes on the show The guy goes off to a guy's villa and the girl goes off to the girl's villa The guy's villa has tons of hot girls living there and the girl's villa has tons of hot guys living there and the whole premise is Will they cheat or will they stick together and on this season two of the guys cheated and When they got back to their spouse or their partner at the end of it, both guys said the exact same thing. They said, I forgive myself and I forgive you. Oh, wow. That's very big of you to forgive yourself for cheating.

Same thing here with this guy who says, it's all water under the bridge now. Let's all be at peace with the decision that I made for my terrible decisions. After all, it's just water under the bridge. Okay, the whole thing about forgiveness is it's up to the person who was wronged to forgive or to not forgive. And really, the problem here isn't necessarily about the $38 ring. The problem is that the boyfriend is showing he doesn't really love her or care about

her. He refuses to talk about it and seemingly the only reason he picked that ring is because it was dirt cheap. I could reasonably see an argument if he went to a lot of stores or thrift stores and he looked around for jewelry and he found a ring that was really pretty and then he got it and realized, oh, this is like a cheap ring, it's like a hundred bucks. Then, you know, he'd have an okay argument but just, nah, this guy's being cheap. Our next Reddit post is from Straight Corner. I'm a 34 year old guy and my wife is 29. We've been married for four years and up until a year and a half ago, things were fantastic.

Our marriage began to deteriorate after there was a significant drop in passionate hugging between us. Not intimacy, just the actual passionate hugging part of the relationship. We would still cuddle and have deep intimate moments talking and just being around each other, but she kept rejecting my attempts at taking things further past kissing. Now we've had no problem communicating so I made sure to address it early and we talked and made adjustments. We both made sure to stay in shape, we tried being more adventurous, we went to couples therapy and counseling, and we even tested both of our hormone levels.

Everything was normal. Each solution would work for a little while and then we'd be back to having passionate hugging maybe once a month. I asked her several times if she was no longer attracted to me, which she denied every time. I asked her if I was falling short in the relationship in any other way, to which she said no. Well, about a month ago, she gets back from her therapy session and tells me that she believes that she's asexual and that's the reason for her libido being non-existent

as of late. I was definitely confused because we've had great intercourse for a while in the beginning of our relationship, but her telling me that she's now asexual was heartbreaking because everything else is great. Obviously, I'm not going to force her, so we had a long conversation about our relationship and I came to the conclusion that we should get a divorce. I say I because she immediately rejected the idea and said that we would figure something out and wouldn't talk to me about it anymore. I didn't know what to say so I dropped it.

Well, three weeks go by without intercourse and I decided that I have to do this for my own mental well-being so I filed for divorce and had her served with papers. Last week when I got home from work, she was going about the day like nothing was wrong. I asked her if she signed the papers and she flat out said, ''We are not getting a divorce.'' And changed the subject and acted like things were normal. Obviously, I thought this was crazy, so I stopped her and said that I couldn't be in a marriage devoid of intercourse. And I mentioned that I was being incredibly fair with our divorce. She can keep the house that we bought and paid for with cash. She paid one third, I paid two

thirds. And I would take all the debt, which isn't much. We'd split our savings and investments in half and she can keep two of our three paid off cars. I only want to keep my sports car. Thankfully, we don't have kids. I love her and wanted her to be comfortable and I have no problem starting over since I make a good income. But she won't budge or talk about the divorce. This brings me to two days ago. I get home and go to our bedroom and find my wife's friend, a 27 year old woman, in our bed naked. I immediately shut the door, said sorry and went looking for my wife. I found her in the kitchen and asked what her friend was doing there and she said that

her friend was here for me. I put two and two together and said that I'm not having intercourse with other women in place of the woman that I chose to marry. She was adamant on saying that I could sleep with her whenever I wanted and that her friend agreed to it. I couldn't believe things would get this far, so I went back to our bedroom and asked her friend to leave. I packed a bag and I've been staying in a hotel nearby since that night.

My wife, her mother, and her sister keeps calling me, but I'm just not interested in hearing what they have to say. This feels like a trick. I just want the whole thing to be over." Then OP posted an update. A few of you commented this in the last post and you were right. She's always been asexual. She and her whole family have known since she was 16. Apparently, this is the reason why her last long-term relationship of three years ended. He broke up with her after the intimacy between them diminished to being non-existent after the first year. She told me that intercourse is easier for her in the beginning

when emotions are running high, but she still needs to force herself to have it. I knew they broke up due to irresolvable differences, but I didn't ask for details, nor did she tell me. After a lot of apologies and crying, she told me that I was the first person that she was able to tolerate intercourse with for so long and that she did enjoy it a handful of times. But after a while, she still felt like she was being...graped. I broke down after hearing this and started kicking myself for not catching on to any of this. She said she tried her best to please me as much as she could.

As for her friend, she was there during her last breakup and helped to support her through it. My wife went to her after I brought up divorce and talked things out. Her friend suggested that she open the relationship for me, but she said she didn't want me sleeping with strange women. So her friend volunteered herself to be the one who sleeps with me. My wife thought that was a great idea, which led to the fiasco at our house. I won't comment on the friend's appearance because it doesn't matter,

and I don't blame the friend. Then two weeks later OP posted an update. After my last update, my wife asked me to meet with her about a week later to discuss things with her. I have been staying at an extended stay since that night with her friend. We met at our house and talked for a few hours. She started off with a ton of apologies for how she acted, her lying about her sexuality and not taking my sexual needs more seriously. Before I could say anything, she presented a signed post-nup agreement that she had drafted with the lawyer, stating that she doesn't want anything. The house, the cars, savings, everything.

I felt like the biggest butthole for thinking that she was tricking me for more money. I asked her if she was serious and she told me to take the post-nup with me and sign it when I'm ready. I still haven't signed it. It's in my backpack. I told her that I still think divorce is our best course of action and that we both deserve to find someone who matches our needs. She still refused and borderline begged me to reconsider. She started crying and so did I. Seeing her like this was devastating. I told her that her finding other women to sleep with me wasn't going to work. What if I develop feelings for them? What if I get one of them pregnant? Do we expect her to get an abortion? She said we'll figure it out as we go along and to please give her more time to work on other

solutions. She set up appointments for intimacy and hormone therapy and is seeing an intimacy guru. I said it sounds like we're going through the same things again, but she was adamant and pleaded with me to wait. There were more apologies on both sides, and we kissed for a while before ending the conversation. Then I went back to my hotel that night. A few days later, I tried texting her but she didn't respond, so I called her dad. Her dad told me that she moved back home and has been holed up in her room since our talk. She called out of work.

He told me that she's barely eating, bathing or talking to him or her mom. He asked me what I was going to do, but I didn't have an answer for him. He just said he understands and he said that he would be here to talk anytime I wanted to. So I went back to our house and a good portion of her stuff was gone. The whole place feels empty. I've been sleeping in one of the spare rooms. I'm planning on flying to my mother's house in a couple of weeks to spend time with my family to decompress from this entire situation. I'm still on the divorce side of the fence, but I guess there's no rush. These two are just completely incompatible. I feel really bad for OP. Finding

out that she views intimacy the way she views it has got to feel like I kicked her the balls. Our next reddit post comes from r slash relationships. I'm a 24 year old guy and my girlfriend is 23 and she has PRINCESS syndrome. I've been with my girlfriend for about 5 months. We've been casual friends since college but only began dating after she graduated. We get along really well. When I say princess syndrome, I don't mean that she's spoiled or entitled because she isn't. Her clothes seem to take over her life. She dresses like a sort of fairy tale princess on

a near daily basis excluding work. Long frilly skirts, lacy blouses, things like that. It works for her because she's very pretty and can pull it off. At first I found it to be very endearing, but then I became aware of how much time she spends on her outfits. She runs a blog that has a sizable amount of followers and she's constantly posting outfit pictures, links to clothing items, and whatnot. She spends a few hours a day on her blog at least. Then she spends time sewing items for new outfits or for her Etsy store.

When we go out, we get a lot of stares at what she's wearing. I've also caught people sneaking pictures of her on their cell phones. This attention makes me uncomfortable. I've asked her to tone it down a bit, but she took that to mean not wearing anything in her hair when we were out together. I've told her several times that I love her just the way that she is, but she seems to brush it off. I had hoped that when she started her new job and the career of her choice that she

would become more serious, but her new boss and coworkers encourage her. I worry that people won't take her seriously or miss how kind and intelligent she is. How can I talk to her about dressing more appropriately without hurting her feelings?" Then 11 days later, OP posted an update. I realized from my last post that I needed to be more supportive, but also communicate on how she could dress down on certain occasions so that we could both be comfortable. Well, I never got a chance to talk to her about it. Last week she called and wanted to stop by my apartment after work. When she got there,

I offered to make dinner, but she said she couldn't stay and we had to talk. I jokingly asked if she was breaking up with me and she looked really guilty. You can see where this is going. We talked about how we were in different places in life and had different goals for the future. Well, she talked, but I agreed. It was a pretty amicable breakup even though I felt blindsided. We agreed to stay friends. I've never been dumped before and it was effing awful. I'm having trouble with the whole social media thing post-breakup. I want a way to keep in touch with her, but as soon as her relationship status changed, all these alternative looking guys have been liking her posts and commenting on her pictures.

I don't think she's seeing these guys, but it still hurts. Then 10 years later, OP posted an update. I was going through an old email and found this account again. I was surprised I could still log in, and even more by the amount of people who had reached out to me. It's a bit embarrassing to relive this breakup from almost 10 years ago. In retrospect, it wasn't meant to be, and I think that I was reeling more from getting dumped than the loss of the relationship. I'm 33 now, and I'm married to a wonderful woman for four years. I learned my lesson about supporting my significant others' hobbies.

My wife loves running and baking. We have a daughter who's turning three this year. I want her to be free to express herself how she likes, as long as it's safe of course. I would do anything for them. I'm still friends with my ex on social media. We don't talk, but we will like each other's posts. She's married to another woman now who also dresses differently. It's not as frilly as she used to dress, but still unusual.

Her pictures look like something out of Anne of Green Gables. She seems very happy on their farm together. It's nice to see that OP grew up here. Because first of all, support your partner's hobbies, man. What's the big deal? Let them enjoy what they like. But secondly, you can wear whatever you want outside as long as it's, you know, not sexually inappropriate.

No thongs at the children's playground, of course. But if you want to go out there in a frilly dress, there is nothing stopping you. Recently, I got a really realistic animal puppet that I brought to my kid's school and the kids love it because when I the way that I use it, it really does look like I'm holding a real live rabbit. I even confuse adults with it. And every time I do it, it makes the kids so happy. It makes me want to do it more just out and about.

So I keep thinking every time I'm out, I'm just like, I could have my puppet right now and I could just be a guy walking around with an animal puppet. And there's nothing stopping me from doing that. Yeah, it's a little weird but the kids would love it. So next time I go to the mall, which we do every week, I may have to bring the animal puppet and see what kind of reactions I get and hopefully my wife won't be too mortified. That was r slash best of redditor updates and if you like this content be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new reddit podcast episodes every single day.