rSlash - r/Bestofupdates my Dad Forced my Mom into an Open Marriage

Episode Date: May 15, 2022

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Welcome to our slash best of redditor updates, where a cheater completely ruins his life. This is a new subreddit for me, and the way it works is people post random posts from all over reddits that have super, super juicy updates. My dad is furious that my mom slept with other people in an open marriage that he wanted. My parents got married when they were super young. My dad knocked up my mom, and their parents married them off. open marriage that he wanted. My parents got married when they were super young. My dad knocked up my mom and their parents married them off. My grandfather was able to set up some business for my dad in a big city and they moved to her soon after my birth.

My mom grew up in a conservative southern town where she was taught to be a submissive wife. And even after moving to the big city, she didn't spend much time socializing. She had no friends and she never went out. My dad was only there to provide for us. He was always a way on business and he wasn't there as a husband for my mom or as a father to me. My dad made a lot of money so we never lacked for anything. Growing up, I became my mom's best friend.

We would talk about everything. I pushed her to make friends and to find hobbies. After years of pushing, she started going to a nearby park and made her first friend a gym trainer. Encouraged by her friend and me, she decided to join the gym. She met a few more people there and started having some semblance of a social life, but she still continued to tell me everything. I think my dad's new secretary gave him the idea, but he asked my mom for an open marriage almost a year ago. He told her that he wasn't happy in their marriage and that she wasn't providing him with everything

he wanted. My mom, who's a Christian wife, was mortified and told me about the proposal in tears. I suggested that she get a divorce, but she said that she didn't believe in it and she wouldn't be the one to end their marriage. As my dad pushed, I knew exactly where this would end up if my mom agreed. Her friend and I convinced her to go along with it. My mom was hesitant at first, but she agreed with a condition that they would be completely transparent with each other. My dad is a 41-year-old middle-aged man with a belly, and my mom, who's 39, is an athletic woman who worked out regularly.

I'm a 22-year-old woman, by the way. I don't know how my dad was so blind, or what he thought would happen. I helped to create online dating profiles for my mom almost six months ago. After getting an insane number of matches, choosing from them and chatting with them for months, my mom started hooking up with a few people. Getting all this attention has provided a massive boost to her confidence and she seems better. My dad hooked up with the secretary almost immediately.

He's had very little luck with other ladies. With their transparency thing, my mom tells him about all of her hookups. A few weeks ago, my dad screamed at my mom for some minor thing. Usually, my mom would have apologized, but with her new confidence, she didn't back down. It's been constant fights the last few weeks. My dad keeps starting fights by making snide remarks about my mom's clothing or appearance. He almost even called my

mom a whore, but stopped himself. I think the concept of open marriage finally sank in. My mom told me that he tried to have a conversation about stopping their open marriage, but she immediately shot it down. I think they're gonna split up. My dad was never there for either of us, but the thought of my parents splitting up feels weird. I don't feel bad for my dad, but I wish you put effort into his family. I am happy for my mom though. Then OP posted an update. A few days after my previous post, my dad left our home and had a divorce served to my mom in a week. My grandparents didn't know about any of this, but my dad told them about it when he served

the divorce. He also implied to them that my mom was cheating on him. Both sets of parents came to our home and started berating my mom. I keep screenshots of my parents' communications and my mom showed them to my grandparents and it got way worse after that. The grandparents started fighting each other, blaming each other's kids for causing all of this.

A few days after this, my mom's old church friends came to our house. Back when my mom used to go to church, they used to look down on her for being from a small town. My mom has always been a very caring and non-judgmental person. So she disagreed with her bigotry and they began excluding her from their activities. After she met her gym friends, my mom stopped going to church entirely. These church friends started calling my mom a slut and she kicked them out. My mom is on a cut right now so she has very defined abs and arms. So along with all the normal stuff getting thrown at her, my grandparents accused her of

having a man's body. And she also had a lot of random transphobia thrown at her. Her trainer friend has been a great support throughout all of this. She contacted the attorney she used for her divorce and my mom is spending a lot of time at her house. It turns out the business my dad is running is owned by my mom. It was set up by my mom's dad in her name, so it belongs to her. I didn't know this until now, and I assumed that my dad owned it.

The whole situation is a huge mess right now. Dad is living in some hotel, and my grandparents left yesterday after a week of fighting and trying to force my parents back together. I know there's a lot more divorce drama to come, but I hope it calms down for now. Ah, the karmic justice of this post. Opie, your idiotic father, what did he expect was gonna happen? He was just a middle-aged douchebag with a pot belly? I mean, yeah, he hooked up with the secretary, but come on,

he's working for his wife's company and he wants to cheat on his wife. What did he expect was gonna happen? Pretty soon, he's gonna be single, broke, and jobless. Whoops! I'm a 28-year-old old male and I want to adopt my sister after my dad's death, but my wife, who's 28, refused because we agreed on no children. Is there a way to fix this? I'm a 28 year old guy and I've been married to my wife, who's 28 for two years. We don't have kids and we don't plan to. I have a little sister who's

11. Due to the age gap, I'm more like another father than a brother. My father passed away from pancreatic cancer. There are two options for my sister. Either I take her in or my uncle takes her in. That is my dad's brother. So we both asked her who she wanted and she chose me. Here's my problem. My wife and I decided that we don't want kids. She doesn't want to adopt my sister, especially since my uncle can. But my sister has no parents now and I want to make sure she's able to recover and be healthy and since she wants to be with me, I'm not going to force her to be with our uncle.

This is causing a lot of tension with my wife. Things escalated and I finally told her I'm gonna do this whether she agrees to or not. She can either accept it or we can get divorced. We haven't talked since then. What can I do in such a situation? And then OP posted an update. I talked with my wife again. She still refused because she doesn't want kids.

So we basically decided to go our separate ways. She asked me, are you really choosing your sister over me? I told her that I don't want to go into this discussion again, but if that's what you want to hear from me, then fine. Yes, my sister takes priority now and I'm choosing her over you. That was our last conversation. I've been living with my sister for one week now. Being a single father, slash brother is definitely challenging, but I'm really enjoying it.

Oh man, OP, that's a tough situation, but honestly, given the circumstances, this is kind of the best possible outcome. I understand that your wife doesn't want to have kids, but like, what choice do you have here? There's the well-being of a child, your actual flesh and blood sister to consider here, and your wife wants to just discard her to someone else because it's not her problem. I don't know, I feel kind of bad for her because this is a sucky situation for everyone, but I guess at least you get to be with your sister now. My best guy friend just told me that he's in love with me two days before my wedding.

I've been with my fiance for three years and engaged for a little over a year. My best friend and I have known each other since freshman year of college. We're all in our early 30s. This morning I woke up to a long text from my guy best friend that he had sent around 6am. Basically, it was him pouring his heart out. He said that he's been in love with me for years, but always hope that I'd end up breaking up with my fiancee and finally notice him. He asked me to call up the wedding and run away with him. The message said, I need to tell you before it was too late.

I just feel gross and sad. I have no feelings for him beyond platonic love. I drafted a response and deleted it over and over. I haven't even told my fiance. I don't want him to have to worry about me so soon to our wedding. I know that I need to, but I don't know what to do or how to phrase it. What's worse is that my guy friend has become my fiance's friend too. I'm also pretty pissed that my friend chose such an unfortunate time to cause me such distress.

There were so many times over the years that he could have just bucked up and told me how he felt. But waiting until right before I married, like I would just cancel my wedding and leave my fiance because of a goddamn text, I want to tell him to not come to the wedding. I can't trust that he wouldn't try to pull something. I don't even know if I want to talk to him again, but the thought of losing my best friend is heartbreaking. Hell, the thought of not having him at my wedding is really painful. He put me in an uncomfortable and possible situation. I wish that it wasn't on me to deal with his feelings

for him. I wish he had either stopped being friends with me when he realized us ending up together would never happen or had told me a while ago. I don't want to kick him while he's down, but I need to make it clear that I have no feelings for him. The wedding is still on and I don't want to kick him while he's down, but I need to make it clear that I have no feelings for him, the wedding is still on, and I don't want him to attend. We've been friends for over a decade, I've been crying over this all day. I feel almost disgusted knowing that this whole time he had ulterior motives. How do I even go about dealing with this? I'm supposed to get married in under 48 hours. Then OP posted an update. So the night that my fiancé got home from his brothers, I let him sit down, and then

I showed him the text. He read it, and I watched his eyes get bigger and his expression angrier. Of course I started apologizing like an idiot, and he told me that I didn't know him an apology for anything. We talked, and he told me that he figured the guy had a crush on me, but he kept it respectful. And really, he had. We were close, but beyond a side hug during greetings and goodbyes, there was no physicality. I even let him read our past messages just to see there was no emotional fear or me leading

him on. I never even vented about my fiance when we would have arguments because I know better than to do that. I would just talk to my mom, lol. So my fiance asked me what I wanted to do and I said that while it did sadden me, I didn't want to met our wedding. I was afraid that he would try some nonsense. We typed up a very brief message together. It said, friend, I'm sorry that you mistook my friendship for something more. The wedding is going to happen, and it'd be best if you didn't attend. To be clear, I let my fiance read this message,

and he stands by my decision to un-invite you. He read the message and left it on red for a while. I honestly started getting pretty anxious over it and my fiance asked if I wanted to block him. Part of me wanted to and part of me wanted to hear him out. And when he finally responded, it was horrible. He called me a liar for leading him on for over a decade that he'd hoped my fiance left me and that we were in fertile. It was just horrible thing after horrible thing and I started crying. My fiance took my phone into the other room while I sobbed. I think he called him, but I'm not sure.

What I do know is that after about an hour he came back in, handed me my phone back and told me that the friend was now blocked on everything. He wouldn't be attending, and that my best man and my maid of honor knew about the situation and they would handle it for me. It was like a weight was lifted off my shoulders, honestly. After reading that message, I really wasn't so sad that friend wouldn't be attending anymore. And our wedding effing rocked. We had the time of our lives surrounded by people who loved us and we loved them. It still feels like a dream to be honest, and if my friend tried to show up, I never heard

anything of it. Man, as I was reading this post, I was thinking to myself that the friend was giving out major in-sell vibes, where he thought that he was like the main character in a rom-com or an anime or something, where eventually the girl would look over at him, and there'd be stars and sparkles and hearts, and she would realize, oh, the guy I've been with is actually a jerk, and I love you, and sell I love you! But instead, he just buried his feelings for a literal decade.

Honestly, what a loser! And then, what's worse, how can you be friends with someone for a decade decade. Honestly, what a loser. And then what's worse, how can you be friends with someone for a decade and then wish that they're infertile and that they end up in heartbreak just because they turned you down like, oh my god, what an awful human being. I don't want to help my boyfriend buy a house. I've been with my boyfriend Mark for two years now. Mark's dream has been to own his own house. He's been saving up for it, but because we live in a medium to high cost of living city, it's not going as fast as he would have liked. Yesterday, he asked me if I would consider covering rent and utilities for a year while

he aggressively saves. Frankly, I'm not 100% on board. I told him this. I asked him if he thought about marriage, and he said that it might be too soon for that, and I agree, but that he definitely loved me and saw a future with me. I asked him if the house would completely be his own, or if we'd buy it together, and he said that it would completely be his own because we aren't married yet, and buying a house together would be risky. I asked him if he'd pay me back my share and he said,

eventually, I inherited a house from my grandmother in a high cost of living city, which I'm currently renting out. I don't want to lose it. And when I inherited it, Mark and I agreed that if we ever head towards marriage, he's fully on board to sign a prenup that ensures that he has no claim on it. He stated that he'd include this house in the pre-nut because it'd be his own. Here's my problem. Mark hasn't done anything for my grandma's house, so he literally has no reason to stake a claim to it. But by covering rent and utilities, I'll be providing monetary assistance to him, and if

we break up, I'd have lost quite a bit of money for seemingly no reason. In a way, I'd feel entitled to a part of his house. Is this a selfish way to thank? I love him, but I don't want to assume this risk, especially because our future together isn't clear. I asked him if he would consider moving in with his parents and I'll find a roommate temporarily for a year so he could save up money. This way, I wouldn't have to spend more than I need to and he'd achieve his goal and

we could still continue our relationship. But he said that I was being incredibly selfish and untrustworthy because it would be our home just not on paper. He said that clearly I didn't see a future with him and now he's not talking to me. And then OP posted an update. After a few days he's not talking to me. And then OP post in an update. After a few days, I made a proposal to Mark. Basically OP offered to front him money, so for example, if she fronted him 50k for a 500k house, then she would own 10%.

It's honestly pretty fair and reasonable in my opinion. Anyway back to her post. I would charge him no interest for the first year. However, if he doesn't pay me back, then he'd need to pay me 10% of whatever the house was worth the next year. So, if the house is 600K, then he'd owe me 60K and so on. To be honest, this isn't that great of a deal because real estate prices are nuts right now and are increasing pretty dramatically. So, this offer is literally worse than taking out a loan.

I proposed this to him in hopes that he would decline and we just go back to never having discussed this at all. To my surprise, he immediately agreed and said that he would get a lawyer to draft an agreement, even though he didn't even have a house to buy yet. Well, okay then, he had the document ready in two days, and he was incredibly pushy about me signing it. But I wanted to review the whole document with my lawyer, so I didn't care. It turns out there were some super shady clauses added with my contribution being termed a gift not alone.

I'm not going to go into the details, but my lawyer basically said that this agreement was super problematic and would cause all sorts of issues down the line. He drafted an alternative and sent it to Mark. Mark did not sign it. He was adamant that I signed the original agreement, but he wouldn't tell me why. He got increasingly angry, became kind of violent for the first time ever, and called me a B word for not trusting him, and for reducing our relationship to a transaction. After two whole days of emotional manipulation and gaslighting, I decided that I no longer trusted or cared for this man, and there was no way and hell that I would continue being in a relationship with him.

So yeah, I'm out of that relationship y'all, and my money is all mine. All I can feel now is peace. Man. The actual audacity of this guy, to tell his girlfriend to pay all the bills for a year so that he could save him money so he could buy his own house and not put her name on it and then call her selfish OP those red flags we're gonna show them self sooner or later you're very lucky they showed themselves now before you waste and more time with this douchebag my guess is that Mark intended to milk you for free money for a year and then dump you after he bought his house which basically meant that you would be paying for the down payment on his house

instead of him that was our slash best of Redditor updates, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit Podcast episodes every single day.