rSlash - r/Choosingbeggars "DRAW ME FOR FREE" "lol ok"

Episode Date: January 18, 2022

r/Choosingbeggars I feel sorry for professional artists sometimes. Can you imagine how often people come to them asking for free work? The artist in today's episode is tired of being used by choosing beggars, so he decides to give them exactly what they ask for -- and what they pay for! Terrible art for terrible people. What's the worst they could do... ask for a refund? Download Honey for free at Joinhoney.com/rslash Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to our slash choosing beggars, where free is way too expensive. Today's episode is sponsored by Honey. We all shop online. Every single one of us. So you all know what I'm talking about when I say there's that little promo code field taunting you at checkout. Don't you just hate to leave it empty? Well, with Honey, you never have to leave it empty. Honey is a free browser extension that automatically applies the best promo codes to your cart. Honey supports over 30,000 stores and has saved over 2 billion dollars for users. When I recently purchased a new mouse from my computer, Honey saved me a few bucks and it cost me nothing.

Basically, when you're shopping online, all you have to do is click the Apply Coupons button and Honey will automatically search for the best coupon and apply them to your order. If you don't already have Honey, you could be straight up missing out on free savings. It's literally free and installs in a few seconds. And by getting it, you'll be doing yourself a solid and supporting this podcast. Get Honey for free at joinhoney.com slash rslash. That's joinhoney.com slash r slash that's joinhoney.com slash r slash graphic design job looking to make 9999 designs for an NFT launch process one create a basic outline and protocol

for all NFTs to create add-ons for basic NFTs. 3. 8-8 and finalize all 999 designs once done. I need them to be transportable into JPEGs. Timeline 2 weeks? Price 150 dollars? What's that one? Board ape? How much are those going for? Yeah, okay.

These things are going for like hundreds of thousands of dollars. This one's going for 5040, how much is 1 1 3. 1 1 3. 3.7 K. So 3,700 times 40 a 3. And is 148,000 dollars. I realize this is like the upper end of the spectrum of how much those art NFT sell for and not every NFT will sell for as much as the board ape yacht club,

but still. This guy is definitely expecting to make a hell of a lot more than $150 profit from it. So to have someone else do all the work of making the art for this NFT, and then offering $150 compensation is just, how much is that per artwork? $150 divided by just how much is that per artwork? $150 divided by 99999. It's, that's, it's a penny.

It's one penny per artwork. Okay, cool, nice. Like it's just so disgusting because this dude's probably gonna offer like $150 per NFT or even more and then he expects to just pay his artist chump change. Then to get even more into the weeds of this math, David 7-9 points out that if you create one of these NFTs per minute without breaks for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, it would

take you an entire month. Posted to Facebook, I'm looking for an in-home sitter again. We only have one car right now, so you'll have to come to me. And given the track record of some of the sitters I've had, I'd rather keep him here to keep an eye on him. I will not bring him to you or have you pick him up. I'm paying $150 a week, and I'll be home if you need something or have questions.

I'll provide everything, just occupy him without keeping him in his room all day. Read books, play with him, etc. He's a great baby. You must also clean up after yourself. Bonus points, if you can pick him up from my sisters on Friday. So the math on this comes out to about 5 bucks an hour, and you need your own car. Hmm, I wonder why she keeps getting terrible babysitters. On this next post, a customer called corporate

to complain and then corporate contacted the store and the store employee said this. So regarding the rude or unprofessional employee complaint, the customer asked for a cup for water and then got soda and then got upset when the manager said something to him about it. The customer said that he thought the employees were giggling about him and his wife. The customer said that he would never return to McDonald's again. So to be clear, this guy stole from McDonald's and then when he got called out on it, he called up corporate to complain about them not letting him steal. Okay, good, please don't ever return to this McDonald's again.

This is a non-exhaustive list of people that you can help slash boil this holiday. You know what to do. I'm gonna start with myself. I've made an extensive Christmas wish list and if you feel like cosplaying Santa Claus, go right ahead. Yes, it's a long one and yes, the shipping costs are high.

But again, the choice is yours. I also need to buy groceries, so if you can and want to help, my PayPal is blank. Then down in the comments, we have this reply from Carl Sagan. A fun thing to do is to buy something off the list, and then have it sent to yourself. That way, if she looks to see if any wishless items have been bought, she'll be expecting a gift that will never come. Our next reddit post is from Angler Zuba. So I work in a fishing shop in Poland and let me tell you guys, the absolute NPCs I meet are just amazing! A few days ago, an older man came in at the

same time that my usual customer comes in. Here it's a custom to say good morning, hi, or at least give a head bob to greet people as a sign of respect. It's kinda rude to ignore a hello. Both men came in at the same time and I told them both, good morning. I got an answer for my usual customer, but I got nothing from the old man, but I paid no mind to it. My usual gets everything he needs and spends about 140 bucks. I give him a discount since he only had 160 bucks and he still had to buy some groceries. So I sold the gear to him for about 120 bucks because he comes in every week and spends about that much. He leaves happy and the old dude suddenly starts grabbing a few things before coming back

to the register. He says, Since you gave him such a great discount, I'm guessing I'll get one too. That's why I grabbed a few more things, so what's my discount gonna be? I look at what he got and it total tore around 60 bucks. I say, sir, I can't give you a discount on these items. There's usually a small discount on any purchase at or over $100. Also, the discount the other customer got was just because he comes in every week, and he needed money to buy groceries. But I'll tell you what, I'll knock off about 50% of the

most expensive item you have here if you promise to come back. His most expensive item was about 2kg of cart bait worth about 50 bucks. What kind of business are you running then? You don't get to pick and choose who you give discounts to? Give me a much better price, or I'm not gonna do any shopping here anymore. Matter of fact, I'm not buying this stuff. It took me a few seconds to process, what on earth just happened here, and then he slid his hand across the counter, knocking everything down. This caused one of the cart bait bags to burst and outspilled a bunch of 2mm pallets all over the store. And one of the liquid attractors spilled as well, leaving the store smelling like bloodworms, which is not exactly a good smell. I told

him he needs to pay for the products he broke. I got a firm, if you, I'm not paying for anything as he slapped the table. So I told him I had this all recorded on-store cameras and I will take this to the cops if necessary. And I also have access to the parking lot cameras to see which car he got out of, so I also have his plate numbers. Suddenly, he had a magical change of hearts. Alright, fine, I'll pay for the attractor in pellets, so that's 25 for the pellets and 5 for the attractor. That's 50 for the pellets and 10 for the attractor in pellets, so that's 25 for the pellets and 5 for the attractor.

That's 50 for the pellets and 10 for the attractor. Where's the discount? It's supposed to be half price. Please, please give me a better price. I'm sorry for what I did, so quit being a brat about it. Please do me this favor. You don't have to be a dick kid. That discount was only for the pellets, and now it's 50 bucks and 10 bucks for the attractor. Please do me this favor, you don't have to be a dick kid. That discount was only for the pellets, and now it's fifty bucks and ten bucks for the attractor.

That discount left as fast as your manners did. Pay up or the cops will handle things. He kept giving me weak apologies while also calling me a dick and pleading with me for ten minutes, but I was not having it. I'm only friendly and treat people with respect if they respect me. He ended up paying full price, and he still comes back quietly and in shame because our prices are the best in town. Moral of the story?

Take the discount and don't throw a fit. On this next post, OP is giving away a sheet of cement board for free. Yes, it's still available. Do you deliver? I didn't's still available. Do you deliver? I didn't plan on it. Could you please? Are you located in Springfield, Virginia? Yes.

Yeah, I'm not driving over an hour from Frederick to deliver a free sheet of cement board that's $9.98 new at Home Depot. On this next post, this guy posts this artwork that he did, and it's really incredible. It's like a black and white pencil drawing and it looks so realistic that, I mean, really it looks like a black and white photo practically. And someone messages the artist. Hi, oh my goddess, your work is absolutely incredible. I'm sure you get hundreds of messages

a day telling you that, but wow, you're so gifted, it's breathtaking looking at your art. I'd love it if you could draw me. I know you're probably really busy, but please, I'd be honored too. Draw this picture please. So you want that drawn for free? Please. Then...

Then the artist replies with just a terrible like stick figure drawing that probably took him 60 seconds to make. Enjoy! Thanks! Forget it, I'm just a fan. Obviously, you're just in this for the money. You are not a fan. Obviously, you're just in it for the freebie.

I'm in it for the memes. Then another person replies, can you draw me please? Hello, are you interested in commissioning a piece or are you after a free drawing? I'm after a free drawing. Draw this picture please. Like, can you start today or tomorrow and get it done in a week? Hey, I finished your drawing. It took a few hours. Also, I felt the image was lacking a background, so I added a bright sun. And he draws another stick figure girl with giant, giant nockers, and a picture of a sun wearing sunglasses. That looks really cool.

And then another person. Hey, I heard you draw for money, but could you do an exception this time? I'm really short on money, and I need to get for my girlfriend. So could you draw this for me? I'm the one in the middle. Done. I think I got your heads a little bit closer than in the photo. Hope that's okay.

And again, another terrible stick figure drawing. Then we have yet another choosing beggar. Okay, what size do you want and do you want a black and white? I want it to be 12 by 16 inches, so basically an A3 size, and yes, black and white please. By the way, will this cost me anything because I don't have any money right now, so if it does, then sorry to waste your time. Oh, so you wanted it for free? Yeah, if you can't do that then that's okay.

All done. Hope you like it. And yet another stick figure drawing of, in this case, Michael Jackson. Our next red-appost is from Daisy Maze Garden. I'm a home baker, not a professional by any means. On a few occasions, I baked for a service club my husband was in. A member's daughter was getting married and they were looking for cupcakes for her wedding and they recommended me. We worked out a small fee and I made the cupcakes. About a year later, that same lady's daughter was having a baby shower and they wanted cupcakes so she called me back.

So again, I made them. About six months after that, the lady's daughter was planning her wedding and she wanted me to make her cupcakes. This time, they didn't know what flavor wanted, so they asked for a sampling of each cupcake flavor I've ever made. I told her that I am not a bakery, so that would not be possible. She said, oh, okay, then every time you make any cupcakes from now on, you can just give me a couple so we can sample them.

I think she thought that I was her personal baker and that I owed it to her. I ended up telling her that I was no longer baking for events. Hey, hey, what's up? Nothing much. I hate to bother you about this again, but I need grocery money. Don't worry about it. I actually just put in my grocery delivery request for tomorrow and I can still add things. Giant has a really good price on chicken, and I'm getting free ground beef with my order,

so I'll give you some of that. What else do you need? I can just go to the store myself. I'd only need like 50 bucks for the week, but I'd appreciate it. You'd have to uber to the store, and that's $10 each way. I'll drop the groceries off at your house tomorrow because my delivery is at 10 a.m. I don't mind, you bring. I don't want to put you out of your way. Lowl, I'm closer to you than you are to the store. Just send me a list of what you need because there's no point in

you spending half of that money just getting around. Could you take me to the store and give me the $50? Then I can get stuff so that you don't have to worry about getting the right stuff. I don't like going to the store on the weekend because it's super busy. Can we go on Monday? Well, I don't really have any food for the weekend. If you give me $70, it'll cover Uber in the food, though. Or, well, go right ahead when your food gets delivered and then you can bring me the ground beef and the chicken and then take me to the store. That would not have to go to the store, which I don't want to do. Just send me a list so I can add it to the delivery.

Can you drop me off at the store and give me 60 bucks? Like that would be 50 bucks plus a one way Uber trip. You know that I just started a new job, right? I'm missing a paycheck already from switching jobs this week. It's cheaper and easier for me to just add your items to my order. Aren't you getting paid more though? How is $60 different from $50? Uh, 60 bucks is slightly more inconvenient than 50 bucks. Just like taking you to the store is slightly more inconvenient than adding your items to my order. Yes, I am getting paid more, but again,

I'm missing a week of pay. Fine. Can I get some chips like Oots or whatever other brand I like? For Jews, I want Apple, Orange, whatever. I want frozen pretzels in the black box. I went tortilla chips in salsa, catered, fudge-stripe cookies, veggie and fruit bowls, and then a couple of frozen microwave meals. Jeez, I gotta interrupt this story for a second. Clearly, this person is going for just the essentials. If I had so little money that I had to beg my friends for money just so I could feed myself,

I wouldn't be getting, what, Fudge Stripe Cookies? I'd be getting plain bread and peanut butter and jelly and like a box of ramen. But this person wants Gatorade and frozen pretzels. What? OP replies. That's not healthy. Want me to just do meal prep for you? I have like a hundred containers and I do it every weekend anyway.

See, this is why I don't want to ask you for anything. Can you just give me the 70 bucks if you're gonna judge me? I told you that I didn't want to put you out of your way. I'm adding it to my cart now. I just figured I'd ask. Thanks, but I'm too old to have someone cooking for me, LMAO like they're my mom. Everything I want should be under 70 bucks, though,

so could I get the rest of it in cash? I really need to pay some bills. What bills? Phone, water, you know. I can help you out next week when I get paid. How much do you need? Why'd you ask what bills I have if you can't help? Can you just take some things out of your cart because I know that you get fancy stuff

like Keenwai and Epping's Star Fruit with organic cashews, LMAO. Just struck with me for a week. Please LMAO. Like I said, next week is the best that I can do. Wow, you really sold out, didn't you? You've known me for over 10 years and you can't give me a couple of dollars so my lights don't get shut off? Wild! Forget the groceries, have fun with your quinoa. My kid and I will just eat lint and cockroaches while you feast over there.

I'm trying to help you, so please don't act like this. We hardly talk. I'm helping you because you have a kid. You're nearly 30 years old, and you're still on this nonsense. So do you want your groceries or not? Don't even worry about it. I see how it is. I'll take the $50 and be out of your way, Princess.

You're just leaving a single, oh, it's a dead. You know what, okay. You guys are just gonna have to imagine that I use the appropriate voice for this because I'm not gonna go back and re-record all this stuff, just because, on literally the last line, this guy says single dad instead of single mom. You're just leaving a single dad and his baby to fin for ourselves. $50 was never on the table. I put some baby food, wipes, and diapers in my cart, which by the way is significantly more expensive than 50 bucks. I'll leave them at your door in the morning. I'm not leaving you and your kid to suffer. I'm leaving

you to suffer. Don't bring your kid down with you. Alright. Okay, tell me that you want money for drugs without telling me that you want money for drugs. That line, man, is just fine. I don't need your friendship anymore. I see how it is. Just give me the 50 bucks and I'll be on my way. Man, the delusion, the delusion. That was our slash, choosing beggars, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast, because I put on your Reddit podcast episodes every single day.