rSlash - r/Maliciouscompliance "FIX YOUR UNIFORM OR YOU'RE FIRED!" "Ok, I'm fired" "NO WAIT!"

Episode Date: May 22, 2021

r/Maliciouscompliance In today's episode, an uptight manager decides that OP's uniform isn't up to company standards. OP wears shorts while he collects shopping carts from the parking lot in 90 degree heat. The manager threatens OP, "Change your uniform, or you're fired!" Sure thing, boss! OP walked off the job and didn't come back, leaving his stupid manager to collect all those carts himself! If you like this content, subscribe for more daily Reddit episodes! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Make every moment a little more magical this season with a Starbucks red cup in your hands. Wrap yourself in the warmth of one of our familiar faves, like a peppermint mocha or a caramel brulee latte. Find your festive with the Starbucks app. Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best posts from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash malicious compliance, where a Karen tries to use an ambulance as a taxi service. Our next Reddit post is from J-Crime. is our slash malicious compliance, where a Karen tries to use an ambulance as a taxi service. Our next reddit post is from J Crime. I was a medic in Salt Lake City for a few

years. One rainy day, my partner and I got dispatched to a fairly upscale neighborhood on a call about chest pain. Chest pain means flashing lights and sirens. We quickly arrive in front of a pretty nice house, and we find a woman standing at the curb with two packed suitcases. This is already a red flag. I shut down this iron, but I keep the lights going for safety. We ask if she called 911, and she confirms. She steps into the ambulance, sits on the bench, and asks us to get going.

I tell her we have to do a full workup before we leave, so we can provide care and rat and take her to the right facility. She says she doesn't really have chest pain, she has a procedure scheduled at the hospital, and she wants me to turn out the flashing lights so her neighbors don't notice and ask her questions. Obviously this is abuse of emergency medical services, and I tell her that. Suddenly her chest pain is back. So I say I need to get vitals and start

an ECG. She protests again, mentioning the start time for appointment is less than 30 minutes away. And so I ask her point blank, do you need medical attention or do we have to call the cops? I proceed to do a full work up in front of her house, taking my sweet time. I ask enough questions to make her eyes roll and I leave the strobe lights on the whole time so the neighbors would see. And she was late to her appointment because we admitted her to the hospital through the ER instead of the front doors. Hey, so like I'm not a doctor, I'm not a nurse. I don't know too much about medical procedures, but I would have to assume that if

you're a doctor and you're about to perform Some procedure when I hear a procedure. I think surgery if you're about to perform Surgery on a woman and she's scheduled to you know come in at 2 p.m. For the surgery and she comes into the hospital At 1.30 p.m. Complaining about chest pain so badly that she like called an ambulance 9-1-1 amulance to come get her and bring her to the hospital Wouldn't you just not do the surgery? that she called an ambulance, 911 ambulance to come get her and bring her to the hospital. Wouldn't you just not do the surgery? Right? Like, obviously, if she's got chest pains, then that's a bigger problem than the surgery,

and maybe she'd figure that out before you do the surgery, right? If there are any nurses or doctors out there who watch my content, can you please let me know down in the comments if I'm right about this? Because it just seems to me that surely they would cancel her appointment, right? And if I am right, then this makes us a lot funnier, because in addition to canceling her appointment, she just had a huge ambulance medical bill. Our next reddit posted from Kim Blake.

So I have a full-time job with hourly pay. However, my job requires me to work over time every few weeks during busy seasons because that's just the nature of the job. On Monday, my general manager flipped out on my coworker asking why she hit overtime last week. She simply replied, well, you worked me six days straight and all those days I was expected to work a full eight hour day. If you don't want me hitting overtime, don't work me six days straight." Fast forward to Tuesday. After that coworker told me about this conversation she and the

general manager had, I was told that I'd be working seven days straight. I mentioned that this would cost me to head over time, so my coworker encouraged me to tell the general manager. I was told, no overtime unless it's approved. I said, that's fine. Friday will be my day off then, so don't contact me about doing work-related things. Today is Friday, and I took the day off. Work was blowing up my phone with things that they needed help with that were so important, but I enjoyed my day on the couch

looking for a rental for my upcoming vacation. Either pay me the overtime, or don't complain when things don't get done. Our next credit posted from Magnus 40. Background I worked for a company making test equipment, mostly in the avionics field. We made a test system for an old internal navigation system. The inertial system tester, or IST, basically moves the sensor through all three axes and precise orders, speed and combination and verifies that it reads correctly.

The test system was ancient. I mean really ancient, even for the 1980s. The machine just had a bunch of blinking lights and it would make these clicking and whizzing noises like some sort of futuristic computer from a 60s TV sci-fi show. Our hero, Dave, was the only person in the company who really knew how this thing worked, and he'd worked on it for decades. The Air Force was replacing the navigation system with a new one, so the test system had to be scrapped. Dave was a stereotypical engineer.

He was very good at his job, but he had low social skills and was brutally honest. He had made enemies, but because the company needed him to work on the IST, they tolerated his manner. Dave was often called out to bases all over the world to help them diagnose problems. He was very, very good at his job, and the Air Force respected him for it. Due to the imminent scrapping of the system that he worked on, Dave was offered early retirement, and he took it. Due to his connections, Dave knew the replacement system was going to be delayed by a year, so the IST service was going to be extended. Dave knew this before the company did. Dave knew this, but he retired anyway. That was the malicious

compliance. A few weeks later, a contract request came through requesting that we modify the system tester to use a more modern technology, and support the system for another year with options to renew the contract annually. Since this was a simple add-on contract, it was agreed with little oversight. Then, the panic set in. Nobody knew how to code the system. It was written in some ancient programming language from the 1960s and also used machine code for an ancient processor that nobody had ever used. Nobody knew where the source code had been archived, and we didn't have a paper tape punching machine.

We eventually found a printout of the source code with some handwritten annotations, and we didn't even know if this was the version that was installed or not. But Dave knew, and Dave had been waiting for that phone call. Dave agreed to come back part time as a contractor at a sphincter, puckeringly high hourly rate for the duration of the contract. The contract was also extended another six months, which means that Dave worked almost up to the point where he would have retired anyways. But in those last 18 months, Dave made a huge amount of money. I like Dave, he taught me a lot.

And down in the comments, we had this story from Burleigh Buddha. This reminds me my grandfather retiring. The story goes that he was working for a large manufacturing company in Baltimore that had a complex system of boilers and other steam-based systems. He was the supervisor of the maintenance department from the 60s to the 80s when he retired. He directed all the maintenance within this complex system and was really the only person who was intimately familiar with the setup. He knew that if you want to serve as this pipe, you have to close off this valve and close off that valve and that valve over there to bleed

the pressure off so the system doesn't explode. Well, his opportunity to retire came and he took it. I'm unsure of this was because the company had been bought, but either way, there was really no written diagrams of the system and all of its valves and checks. You would think a company would keep such a thing, but hey, what it was, Peeons, no, right? So as a result, the only place where all this information was stored

was in my grandfather's head. He offered to write everything down, but that would take another week past his retirement. The company didn't want to pay him for the week, so he shrugged and pieced out. Fast forward a month or two. Grandpa was enjoying not having to go to work every day. The phone rings. It's one of his old coworkers with a question about the steam network. Before the guy had even finished a full sentence, my grandfather stopped him and said something

to the effect of, Let me get this straight. You don't know where XYZ is, and the system is in failure with the potential for a critical breach. The guy on the phone confirmed that, and my grandpa said, Well, I did offer to write this all down for you, but the company didn't want to pay me for the extra week and thought that it wasn't a big deal not to have those notes. I'm retired and it's no longer my problem, but here's what I'll do. I'll come in and help you with your issue as a contractor.

My rate is $500 per hour with a 2 hour minimum, no exceptions. The guy hung up the phone and my grandfather went about his business. The next morning he gets a call from the company's management agreeing to his terms. Apparently, the day before, they had to shut the system down entirely or else it would have cratered. He went in with a contract that he had them signed, then fixed the issue in 15 minutes, netting him $1,000 for it. For the next few years, they'd have to call them time and again until they've put together

their own schematic and notes on the system. This episode is brought to you by Intel. In a hybrid environment, IT needs an integrated PC solution. IT needs Intel VPro with manageability, security, performance, and stability for all their PCs. Intel VPro, built for what IT heroes do. Bill for business. No product can be absolutely secure.

Learn more at intel.com-for-slash-IT-Heroes. Fandul Casinos' exclusive live dealer studio has your chance at the number one feeling. Winning, which beats even the 27th best feeling, saying I do. Who wants to slash parachute? I do. Enjoy the number oneasperish you? I do. Enjoy the number one feeling. Winning, in an exciting live dealer studio, exclusively on Fandule Cassini,

where winning is undefeated. 19 plus and physically located in Ontario. Gambling problem, but 1-866-531-2600. Or visit connectsonterio.c. Please play responsibly. Our next reddit post is from SniffyNots. Before the pandemic, my significant other and I were doing some shopping and decided to eat at a harvester, which is a large chain here in the UK.

It's a reasonable food at the cheaper end of the scale, and it's okay when you're not looking for a post dining experience or anything. They were having an offer for a soft-drain, salad bar buffet, main course, and dessert, which came out to 30 pounds for two people, it was a bargain so we ordered that. The food turned out to be pretty good. We made more than one trip to the buffet and suffice to say, by the time we'd finished our main courses, we didn't feel the need for dessert. So instead we asked the server for the bill.

The bill arrived and we've been charged an additional 9 pounds for 39 pounds in total. I questioned the server about this. That offer is only valid with desserts, and you said you didn't want desserts anymore. We intended to have the desserts, but we're too full for them now, so we don't want them. But I didn't expect that we would be charged more. Well, you haven't ordered the offer anymore, so there's nothing we can do. Queue the malicious compliance. Well then, I'd like to order two desserts please.

You can bring them over, we won't eat them, and you can get the 9 pounds knocked off the bill for us. At this point, the server looks at me with this bewildered look and says that she'll get the manager. My other half, who's more of a shrinking violet in these situations is looking a little uncomfortable. A few moments later, the manager comes over and asks why we don't want to pay. I explain that I do intend to pay, but I'm not going to pay more by not being wasteful. But by all means, bring over the desserts and we'll just leave them here on the table

when we leave. Once the manager gets the full picture, she just agrees to charge us for the meal deal. And down in the comments, we have this toy from Androff. A little while after my second child was born, I took my older kid who was then 3 years old to a Harrison Osprey resort in British Columbia for the weekend to give her a small break from the new baby. When I booked the one night stay, there was a deal for a bit in breakfast rate, which was a room plus a breakfast for two.

As I checked in, I was given two meal vouchers. Skip a hitch of the checkout. I, like many, didn't read the bill when I went to go pay because I had already prepaid for this day and I didn't have any additional charges. As I was loading up the car, I glanced at the receipt and I saw there was an additional charge for a kid's breakfast. I went back to the reception and asked about the charge because I had paid for the two meals in the package. They said the charge was for a child's meal and that I had prepaid for two adult meals. I explained that my child

was three and only ate one pancake and fruit, and it was absurd to charge her for an adult meal and a child meal. I asked to speak with the customer service manager and they wouldn't budge. I then asked to speak with the food and beverage manager and they wouldn't budge. So I asked for my meal voucher back since I hadn't actually used it. I looked at it and I noticed there was no date on it. So I turned to the guest behind me waiting to check in and asked if they had pre-purchased breakfast. They hadn't, so I handed them the voucher.

I then turned back to the reception manager and proceeded to cancel the two other weekends that I had booked. Our next bread at Postage from Hungry Hungry Hippo. The summer after my senior year in high school, I were collecting shopping carts at a grocery store. I lived on the coast, so it was hot as hell during the summers. It was one of those uppity grocery chains, so we had a pretty strict dress code. White, long-sleeved dress shirt tucked into khaki dress slacks.

But because I worked outside a good portion of the day, management let me wear khaki shorts and a short sleeve button up. Everything was fine until the end of summer, when we got a new general manager who was much strict around policy than the old one had been. When I came in for my first shift with a new manager, he called me into his office. There have been some changes. Your uniform is clearly lacking in several areas, and I'll need you to correct it. We'll need you to go home and change into pants in the provided long sleeve button up. Thinking he had mistaken me for someone who works inside, I said, actually sir,

I collect cards, so I'm allowed to wear shorts. Sun, I said what I said. Either you adhere to the dress code or you go home. So, I don't have a choice but to wear pants in 90 degree heat in the height of summer. That's the policy. And being smart with me is not getting us off on the right foot. All right then, I'm going home. Good, thank you for your understanding. I walked out of his office fully understanding that he expected me to actually come back.

But his ultimatum was to either wear pants or not come into work. So I chose the latter. I was going away to college in a couple of weeks. So I chose not to sweat my balls off six hours a day for seven bucks and 25 cents an hour. I was at home about an hour later, chilling, talking to my friends on Xbox 360 Party chat,

and I got a call from my manager who was furious. He was asking me what the hell was taking so long that they were swamped and they desperately needed a cart collector. I told him I wasn't coming back. Of course, he didn't take this well. He told me to come back immediately or I would be fired. I responded with, well, I thought that was the idea.

He was absolutely dumbfounded. He hadn't expected me to call his bluff on something he considered to be so inconsequential. You know, because he wasn't the one outside pushing carts in the heat. He tried to talk me into coming back, but I told him that he gave me two options, and I chose option two. I never went back into work. I found out the cart collectors were only made to wear pants for a few days after that, and then eventually the new manager relented and let them wear shorts. I never got a call with an apology from him, but I didn't care.

I enjoyed the time off before going to college. I don't even understand why this manager was digging in his heels about that. Do you really want hot, sweaty teenagers sweating all over your carts while you're handling your groceries? Cause I don't. Our next credit post is from TXG. Back in the days when we could still go to concerts, I was stuck with a couple of tickets

for a sold out gig. When we got to the venue, I sent the rest of the family in to see if I could sell my spare tickets. I was only selling them for the face value, 60 bucks. I just wanted my money back. It was only a relatively small venue, so there was only one obvious scalper in view. I asked if you wanted to buy my pair of tickets, knowing that he could resell them for way over face value.

He offered me 10 bucks each. Take it or leave it, or see if you can get more for them. I told him that I'd rather tear them up in front of his face and let them go that cheap. End of conversation. Within 5 minutes, a taxi pulled up, a couple of people jumped out desperate for a pair of tickets. The scalper was on them like a shot. I slowly wandered over to join their conversation and the scalper was just about to close a deal

for $120 each for a pair of tickets. I leaned in and said, hey fellas, I've got a pair of tickets here for face value, 60 bucks each. They were a little skeptical, but they walked in with me to validate that they were genuine and they paid up. Hey Mr. Scoutper, you told me to try to get more. It's a shame it cost you your sale. Down in the comments we have this word from Saisy.

I have a similar story, Muse was playing in Manchester. I bought six tickets for me and five friends. One friend couldn't go and we couldn't find anyone else who could come at short notice. My friend paid for his ticket and said that if we could sell the ticket over there, we could have some drinks on him. That was nice of him, but I didn't want to have to pretend to be a scalper, so like OP, I approached a scalper and asked if he wanted to buy my tickets. I don't remember the price he gave, but it was a similar insulting offer,

and I told him what he could do with his offer. So, I just waited near the scalper until he almost had a sale. Then I offered our spare ticket to the buyer for free. The customer was happy, I was happy, and the scalper might have killed me if I didn't have five friends and a new friend backing me up. Screw you, scalper, and

muse was awesome. That was our slash malicious compliance, and if you liked this content, check out my Patreon where I publish extra episodes. Also, be sure to follow this podcast, because I put a new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.