rSlash - r/Maliciouscompliance "SUE ME!" "lol ok"

Episode Date: December 11, 2023

0:00 Intro 0:08 Sue me 6:43 My boss 7:57 Threat wording 10:17 The time 12:08 The apartment Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to our slash malicious compliance where someone says, so sue me, NLP says, okay, our next reddit post is from hot cryptographer. I was working 40 hours a week programming at my main job, but I did occasional small projects in the evenings and on weekends for other clients. At one point, I was referred to a large company that runs major stadiums and event venues around the country. I'll just call the company Mark I for the sake of the story. This manager at Mark I said they wanted a simple administration database and user interface for employee timekeeping.

Apparently, the old system they had was not working for them. I got details of what they wanted and drafted a set of specifications. I told them I could write the system for $2,000, flat rate. They agreed. I immediately went to work and turned out a database in UI for the system with full documentation in about two weeks.

Then I scheduled an in-person meeting to show them. Now when I showed up at the meeting, someone representing the security department was there. He asked me about installing some additional features and I told him, sure, I can do that. So I went back, wrote up a change request, and incorporated the additional features into the program. I scheduled another meeting with Mark one for a couple of days later. When I got to that meeting, I noticed the audience had grown. There were two extra people from the finance department.

They asked, can you add feature X, feature Y, and feature Z? I said, sure, no problem. So I left, wrote up a change request, and added the features. A few days later, I met with them again. Imagine my surprise when the audience size had grown, and the new attendees asked for more features. This went on for about five more rounds, and I was getting frustrated that what was originally a two-week project

was now taking months, and I wouldn't be paid until I delivered, and they accepted the final product. But I chugged along, implementing all their change requests, but one day, the Mark One manager called me. She gave me a list of a dozen new features they wanted, some of which would require a complete redesign of the core database and an overhaul of the UI. I'd had enough, so I told her, this is a complete overhaul.

I'll have to redesign and rebuild this from the ground up. Well, that's not my problem, she responded. I said, well, actually, it is. I'm not going to design and build an entirely new system until you pay me for the current one built to the specs that we agreed on. After a short pause, she dropped this bomb on me. Well, we're not going to renegotiate. You can consider this project cancelled.

I said, that's not how this works. You still have to pay me for the work I've done. No, I don't. You haven't delivered anything. Sue me. Then she hung up. CUME LITIOUS COMPLIENCE I took that manager's advice and went to the courthouse the next day to file a small claim score to recover $2,000 from the Mark I company. On my court date a couple of months

later, I went down to the courthouse and was greeted by an arbitrator. In my state, we have court-appointed arbitrators to meet the litigants when they arrived, to see if the parties can sort out the case with an agreement to maximize the judge's time. The arbitrator asked me, is there anything you would agree to resolve this immediately? I thought about it and said, if they pay me 90%, so 1,800 bucks, right now I'll drop the suit. Hey then went to a side room where the Mark 1 manager and the corporate lawyer were hanging out. I heard the manager screaming that they would either pay everything or pay zero. The arbitrator came to me with a news and I told him, yeah, I heard, and I'm happy to take

the full amount. He laughed and said no, they want to go to trial. Fast forward a couple of months and were standing in front of the judge. I'm at my table by myself and the Mark one manager and lawyer are standing at the opposite table. The judge asked the manager to tell her side of the story first. She went into a very long speech about the project in corporate America and Apple Pie and thermonuclear weapons and honestly I have no idea because I stopped listening about 28 minutes ago. She talked nonstop for at least 30 minutes. Then the judge asked me for my story. Now I wasn't maliciously ignoring the manager's long-winded tale of political intrigue and patriotism.

I was actually formulating a strategy. I thought to myself that this judge probably has people who like to give long drawn out speeches in front of him every day all day. I also thought that he might appreciate a short and sweet story that got straight to the point and didn't waste his time. So I said, Your Honor, they agreed to pay me $2,000 to design and build a software system for them. I completed the work based on the agreed upon specs and they decided to cancel the project after I was done. That was it. Then the judge asked me, how do I know you did the work? I had printed out the specifications, change requests, documentation, and source code the night before. I lifted a 500 page ream of paper from my table and offered it to the bailiff. I said, here's the code I wrote for them, your honor. The bailiff came to take it from me, and the judge waved him off and said,

no need, I can see it from here. The judge then asked the manager, is this true? The manager looked like she was in a days. Uh, yes? Then I find in favor of the plaintiff in the amount of $2,000. I'm at a month later, Mark won still hadn't paid. So I called the county sheriff and explained. I sent him the court judgment documents and he said, no problem, they'll pay.

The sheriff actually called me later that day. He was on a cell phone and I could hear him talking to the Mark one manager. He told her to cut a check for $2,000 right now or he was going to quote, rip your computers off the wall and auction them off until the judgment was satisfied. I don't know if he had the authority to do that, but the sheriff seemed to have a grudge against Mark I, and he was reveling in the opportunity to dog them out.

Apparently, Mark I believed he did have the authority, because long story short, the sheriff had a $2,000 check in his hand about 15 minutes later and it was in my mailbox about a week later. Yeah so based on my understanding, actually yeah that is one of the sheriff's jobs to go to companies that won't pay up, take their stuff and then auction it off for money. So yeah I share off a bunch of other deputies what a rolled in and literally ripped computers off the wall to sell them. Now my guess is that he probably didn't want to do that because that sounds like a lot of work and a lot of dramas. So instead, it's a lot easier to just pick up the phone and say, ma'am, this is the share of speaking. So yeah, I guess the intimidation

we're at worked here. Our next Reddit post is from Bobber. My boss and I had a disagreement about working from home this week. The office is in San Francisco and I live in the East Bay, so I need to cross the Bay Bridge to get to work. We had an important presentation schedule today. I wanted to do it virtually because there's some conference going on in San Francisco and everything is super crowded. President Biden and Chinese President Xi are there. It's a two hour commute on a normal day, so I told my boss that it just might not be feasible to come in this week. My boss insisted that I come in, so I said, okay, but don't blame me if I get stuck in traffic.

We had a pretty heated discussion about it. So today, there's a huge backup on every freeway towards the Bay Bridge because protesters have chained themselves across all five lanes. The bridge is completely closed. So now, my boss wants me to do the presentation virtually, but I told him I can't, I'm stuck in traffic. I can't operate my vehicle and do the presentation at the same time, so you'll have to do it without me. Something that he's not really qualified to do.

Man, that's such a great reversal because your boss tried to make it your problem, but then you just turned around and made it his problem. Our next reddit post is from Crafty Math. I'm a 25 year old guy, and some years ago I broke up with my girlfriend. She had cheated on me after seven years together, and where we lived, we had a one month notice to leave our apartment. In order to not pay two rents,

I had to wait until the end of the notice before moving out. In the end, my ex-girlfriend kept the apartment with a new roommate, but we still had to pass the landlord's inspection to get our security deposit back. I moved out something like five days before the inspection date, and living with someone you dump for almost a month can be hard. She was either trying to convince

me to stay with her, or trying to make my life miserable because I dumped her. As you can guess, when I moved out, I wasn't thrilled to know that I'd have to come back some days later to refill holes, repair some stuff, and clean the apartment with her before the inspection. But hey, I'll do it. So just before leaving, sitting in my car about to start the engine, she tells me, You better really help me for the cleanup. You either clean really good, or I keep the security deposit. Now to be clear, we weren't speaking English, but the way that she phrased it in our native tongue, this sentence could be interpreted as either a

threat or a choice. However, the tone and context sure enough clarified that it wasn't supposed to be a choice. Also, some context, I don't love doing chores, but I don't mind cleaning. And in the seven years that I had been with my ex, she had never once cleaned the toilets or the bathtub because it disgusted her, so when we were together, I was always the one to clean those to compensate. And in terms of income, I was working as an IT engineer, and she was a student. So the security deposit of about 800 euros split 400 each way might be a huge amount of money for her, but personally, I didn't care that much.

So I simply replied, okay, she looked at me a bit confused Not understanding my answer. I said, okay, keep the deposit and do it all by yourself. I didn't wait for an answer I just drove off. When I arrived home I messaged the landlord and my ex telling them to send a full deposit to my ex and none to me because I never set foot in the department again. So I guess instead of Revenge's a dish best served cold, this is Revenge is a dish cleaning cold piss. Our next Reddit post is from Happy Scattered Reader. For many years we would go on big family trips. All of these trips had one thing in common. My aunt, uncle, and cousins would be late for everything. This used to really irritate my parents, who are pretty punctual, and they had a lot more kids to organize. Four of us compared to my two cousins. So,

everyone agreed to just give my aunt and uncle the wrong time to show up. For example, if an event started at 11am, they'd be told to show up at 10am. This was pretty effective until my aunt and my uncle started realizing that they were being given the wrong time. I believe my other family members explained why that was, and that they were fed up with always waiting on them or being late. Since my uncle and aunt clearly lacked self-awareness. They decided that this wasn't their fault and they told my parents, give us the right time from now on and you'll see we're not the problem. The next week we had a day trip booked on the ferry.

This is something that we did once a year, going over to the UK and back in one day. It was finally known as the booze crews back in the day due to the opportunity to purchase cheap alcohol. The kids would explore the ship and when we docked, we would buy a bunch of stuff that we couldn't buy at home. It was something that we all looked forward to. And well, the ferry waits for no man. So it was a sad day for four people who were told the ferry left at 8 a.m. sharp, the

correct time, and who arrived after 830 to see a small, fairy-shaped speck in the distance, headed towards the UK. Sadly, this didn't make them any more punctual after that. But they were always told the correct time as requested, and if they were late, we just didn't wait any more. For months, whenever we saw them after that, my parents used to give them a cheery wave and say, very nice to see you. Our next Reddit post is from Monty Python. I'm renting an apartment from a company, and somehow all of their renting agents are unprofessional, laid, and kind of slow. I've had a plethora of issues within throughout the past 10 months, but that's a story for another time. Since I told my landlord that I'd be moving out, they instructed their agents to find a new tenant for the apartment.

The way it worked was the agent would email me with a proposed date and time, and I would confirm that I'd be in at that time. I've got a cat, so I insisted on being present during the viewings. Somehow, the agents never had keys. I think that's because the landlord's office is at the other side of the city, and they can't be bothered to drive an extra hour each time there's a viewing to pick up the keys.

So, they relied on me to let them in each time. Apart from a couple of unannounced show-ups, followed by passive-aggressive emails about the messy property, everything was going fine, until a week ago. The agent emails me saying they've got a viewing on the 13th. I responded that I've got work that day, and I won't be able to do the 13th. She simply responds, if you won't be able to accommodate this request, I'll ask the landlord for a 24 hour notice of entry, which is legally enforceable. Okay, fine, do that then.

The day comes, and I get a phone call. We're downstairs. Congratulations, but I'm not home. I hope you brought the keys this time. And I wish I could have seen her face. We went back and forth a bit and she tried to threaten me with legal action, to which I replied that I don't object to them entering, they're just unable to enter through their own negligence and I have nothing to do with it.

Naturally, I got an email from the landlord asking me to be more cooperative next time, which was probably ignored. That was our slash malicious compliance, and if you liked this content, be sure to follow my podcast, because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.