rSlash - r/Maliciouscompliance Weird request, but OK

Episode Date: July 27, 2020

r/Maliciouscompliance Welcome to another episode of one of my favorite subreddits! Today, we've got a guy who wants to change his name with a travel company, but the company only allows him to make "small changes." Sure thing! I'll just keep calling in and change my name one letter at a time. If you like his video and want to see more, subscribe to my channel for more daily Reddit content! 🔔 Subscribe: https://bit.ly/2E3A8i6 💬 Discord: https://discord.gg/VD6eYD3 🎧 Podcast: https://link.chtbl.com/rslash ⚓ Send me a voice message: https://anchor.fm/rslash 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rslashyt/ ♪ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@rslash0 🛒 Merch: http://bit.ly/rSlashMerch 🎁 Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/rslash Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Welcome to R-slash, a podcast where I read the best post from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-slash malicious compliance and next a word from our sponsors. This happened about 10 years ago now and I have a good chuckle about it every time I pass the place in my car. I'm a pretty meat guy so this is probably the only rebellious thing I did in my entire teenage life. My dad owns a farm, and being his son, this meant that I had a job when I was a kid, whether I liked it or not. Mostly I understood this, but that didn't mean I had to like it.

I resented having to spend entire days of summer vacation, dawn to dusk, in a tractor when it came time to harvest alfalfa, which we did four times between spring and fall. Basically, imagine a teenager with ADHD forced to sit in one place for 14 hours, and you'll understand how it felt. Honestly, if I wasn't a total introvert, I might have snapped sooner. So anyway, it's a second day of the harvest, and it's getting to be late in the afternoon. I spent about 20 hours total in the haybind by this point over the past few days, and I asked my dad which fields to cut next and I ask him when I'll be done, hoping, in vain that I can leave and go play video games or whatever.

This is where the titular line comes in. I'll pick you up at dark. Little does he know that my little teenage heart is clenching with righteous anger for all this wasted paid time. So several hours pass and I'm understandably getting pretty irritable. It starts getting dark and guess what?

No sign of my dad. At the time, it was becoming a bit of a recurring joke in my family about how my dad was always late. so I knew I was in it for the long haul. Then it occurred to me, and the malicious compliance begins. My dad said that he'd pick me up at dark, and he wasn't picking me up, so that must mean that it wasn't dark yet. And what don't you need if it's not dark outside? That's right, headlights. So I continue going back and forth on this wide, empty field, squinting as the light continues to fade after sunset and stubbornly refusing to turn on the headlights.

I can easily see the ages of the field, of course, but everything else is blending in pretty well. I start purposefully and accidentally leaving some shark fins, which are what we call the mistakes that Habein operators leave between rows when we don't get any alfalfa. A few small shark fins per field are fine, even expected, but these are on a whole new level. My dad shows up after about 30 minutes of total darkness. I forget our exact conversation, but I do remember the result.

After asking me why I didn't turn on the lights and me telling him why, he laughed up roarsly and I still remember it finally to this day. I never did get any punishment. I'm not sure he understood the extent of his miscell falfa, it was dark after all, and it was hard to see in the dim moonlight, but whatever, it was just a few rows. I, however, like to think he was a little proud of me because I was a type of teenager who never got into mischief. I asked him about it recently, and unfortunately he has no memory of the incident. Oh well. I, however, will probably remember this little bit of malicious compliance fondly for the rest of my life.

It might have been pretty insignificant and motivated by laziness, but it was also the first time I really stood up for myself against any authority figure. Don't worry about it OP, not every R-slash malicious compliance story has to involve crushing someone's spirit. It's kinda nice to have a sweet story every once in a while. This is almost like R-slash wholesome compliance. Our next Reddit post is from Gidey How You Going. Many years ago, I had a job that permitted me to travel around the world of fair amount. Travel. Remember that?

But I digress. As a part of that travel, I thought a wise join a few frequent flyer and hotel reward type schemes. I had little control over my travel plans and frequently would use different airlines and stay in different hotels. Whatever was cheapest was the rule. Anyway, the time came where I was lucky enough to be booked into one of the really big name hotel groups. So, naturally, I wanted to make sure I was enrolled in their rewards came to start collecting

nights and some sort of status points. Unfortunately, the online signup had a slight glitch. Even though I definitely filled out my details correctly and even had a welcome email summarizing as much, something when a miss in their database and my surname was registered as both my first name and my surname. So after that initial welcome email, every other greeting or communication was addressed to Mr. surname surname. Unknowing but meh, I felt like a live with it. As luck would have it, I ended up being to stay in hotels owned by this hotel group a couple of times. And even though my status was equivalent to medieval surf, I decided that it was time to correct the mistake that had been in place a couple of years. I found the contact number for my membership, provided my membership number, and explained the problem.

I asked quite simply, can you fix my first name to be my actual first name, not the glitch that it is now? After a long pause, I was told. No, that's a name change, and we would need to see a copy of your passport or driver's license to verify the change of your name. Well, that wasn't going to happen. Never mind the fact that I don't drive. I wasn't about to email my passport image to them to fix this. Isn't there anything you can do?

I mean, this is such an obvious error. We're only permitted to make minor corrections to name, such as a misspelling, and at maximum a two-letter variation. And with that, I hung up and developed a con-valued plan. Starting the next day, and for the next few weeks thereafter, I would call up the hotel membership team. Tell them there was a minor misspelling on my name, and ask them to make a correction of one, perhaps two letters. Actually, there's no in in my first name. Can

you remove it? Yes, the C is silent, but it is there. Can you please add it? It's not why, it's I. And so on and so forth. I made only the most subtle of changes with each call, and thankfully none of the agents I spoke to had ever helped me before. Hooray for large outsourced call centers, I guess? It took about eight or nine calls, but eventually I was properly me again. An amusing side effect of these changes is that whenever you make a spelling correction, it re-issues membership cards to members, you know, to be nice.

For a long time, I had a stack of various bizarre spellings of my name on little plastic cards in this hotel. Every now and again when checking in, I'd present one of these unusual variations, and the Stafford Check-In would be rather perplexed. I'd summarize the story, and the sympathetic laughs would occasionally result in a room-up greater other minor perk. Not nearly as impactful as many of the other events recounted in this community, but it amused me greatly at the time.

Our next reddit post is from Rintical. Last week, me and my friend went out to eat for the first time in over three months. There was a short line before being seated with just one other couple before us. The man insisted that he had a reservation, but the waitress couldn't find his name in her tablet and immediately he got loud and angry. The waitress suggested that maybe the man had called a wrong number because there's another restaurant 50 kilometers from here with the same name, and sometimes people mix up the two of them when doing a Google search. She was very polite and calm about it, but the man got even angrier and accused

her of trying to ship the blame. Said she couldn't do her job blah blah. The waitress tried to say that they still have some open tables, and if he could wait a moment she would go and check. But the man kept speaking loudly over her and saying that she must find his reservation. So eventually, the waitress called the owner and the owner took the man and his companion to one side so they wouldn't block the line while she tried to figure out what was going on. Now, me and my friend didn't have a reservation either because I'm a total scatterbrain and I forgot to call a head. I told the waitress as much and asked if there would be any chance they could fit us in. She told me not to worry, there were still tables available and we were seated within a

minute. Our table wasn't near the entrance so so we didn't see what happened next, but the same waitress brought us our coffees at the end of dinner, so we asked her if everything was okay. Me and my friend had been talking about it, and we're appalled at the man's behavior. The waitress told us not to worry, that the owner had let him stoop for a bit, and that she'd called the other restaurant with the same name. The manager of that other restaurant had confirmed that they had a reservation under his name. The man was very annoyed at being proved wrong, and asked to be seated since they had been waiting a long time. The owner said that, unfortunately, all the tables were full. The man said, but earlier you had empty tables, I saw it. The

owner said, yes, but you told the staff you didn't want to be seated. You wanted us to find your reservation. We have found your reservation. It's for a restaurant in another city. In the meantime, other people have come in and all the tables are full. We have no seats left. The man didn't take it well, but the bartender, a huge giant of a man, was standing nearby, so he scampered off in rage, swearing he was never coming back.

I think everyone in that restaurant will be happy if he keeps that promise. Man, what kind of threat is that? I'm a huge douchebag, and I promise I'll never come back ever again. Okay buddy, bye. Metrolinks and cross cross links are reminding everyone to be careful as Eglinton Cross Town LRT train testing is in progress. Please be alert,

as trains can pass at any time on the tracks. Remember to follow all traffic signals. Be careful along our tracks and only make left turns where it's safe to do so. Be alert, be aware, and stay safe. Our next reddit posted from the peasant king M. I live in started in a Spanish-speaking country and since I went to a public university, most of my classmates didn't speak English. By the time this story happened, I was fluent in English in French.

For one of my classes, the teacher had a digital version of the subject's textbook, but he had an English. The very first time he used the textbook in class, he asked me to read it out loud. It wasn't immediately clear to me if you wanted me to read in English for him to translate later, or if you wanted me to read in Translate into Spanish. Especially since he had no way to know my English level, so I asked. In Spanish? No, in French, he answered with sarcasm.

And that's what I did. I read and translated the whole paragraph into French. After I finished, I could see he was angry while my classmates were mostly astonished. Our next read it posted from Vibein. Now, this will begin with a bit of terminology. I play Final Fantasy XIV, which is a multiplayer video game. In Final Fantasy XIV, there's three types of classes. Tank, who leads the way and makes sure enemies don't attack anyone else.

Healer, who heals damage in Resurex State players, and DPS who deals the majority of the damage. Dungeons are run with one tank, one healer, and two DPS. Usually randomly assembled from people who queue up for the dungeon. The class that I play as Red Mage, who, importantly to this story, is unique among DPS classes in the sense that it can do pretty decent healing output and very easily resurrect others. Something even healers can't do. Without going into details, healers can only resurrect instantly once a minute and Redmage

just can do it once every 5 seconds. Dungeons have 3 bosses, each harder than the last. So this happened yesterday when I got into a dungeon. Kitana Reveal for the knowledgeable with a scholar as a healer. Note, Kitana is a pretty high level dungeon, definitely not for beginners. Red flags went off immediately because for some reason Kitana tends to attract questionable scholars in my experience. Note that the scholar wasn't new to this dungeon.

We go through the first boss with relative ease, but in the second boss, the scholar is struggling to heal the incoming damage, and then dies when a pillar falls on them. I casually resurrect them and heal the tank while they're resurrecting. They got mad, but didn't tell. Then, later on, the tank gets bold and collects more enemies than they can chew, and the healer is doing kind of subpar healing, so I again pitch in with my healing spell. The third and final boss comes, and those who already ran it know that the final boss of Kitana is especially tough because of the sheer amount of unavoidable damage. We start, and I can already see the scholar isn't using their abilities effectively to mitigate and heal damage with the exact spell needed for the situation.

They also aren't running away when the enemy ability requires them to run away. I tell them that's what the ability requires and they don't answer. Nor run away when the boss uses the ability on them again. This goes on for a bit, then the tank dies. I casually resurrect them and heal them up. The healer dies shortly after. I resurrect them too. We eventually wipe when I die and the healer starts casting a long

Resurrection spell on me, gets interrupted by damage and dies to an unavoidable possibility, then the tank and the other DPS die. We have to go back to the boss and start it from the beginning since everyone died. This is called a wipe, and while looking at there, the scholar goes off on me. He says, I'm the healer, you're the DPS, stop doing my job. I literally saved us a good couple of times, but sure buddy, I reply with an okay boss time. Right off the bat, we get severely damaged by unavoidable damage and the healer isn't using their correct abilities.

I just mind my business in DPS. Then the healer dies, ironically because they weren't running away from that one boss ability. The tank eyes me expectantly. I cast another berthunder, a DPS spell. The tank is trying their best to keep themselves alive, but tanks are not healers, nor red mages, and they eventually go down. The boss targets the other DPS next and hits them heavy.

If only I had a healing spell. They go down and since I'm refusing to heal even myself, I die. That's a white folks. As we're all going back to the boss, the tank asked me why I didn't resurrect the healer or them. I reply, the scholar asked me to do my job and DPS. The tank responds with opening a vote to kick the scholar from the group. The vote passes with flying colors. A couple minutes later, we get another healer, a white mage this time, and we finish the final boss without any further issues. So I've actually played Final Fantasy XIV before, and one important detail that OP forgot

is that if you get kicked out of a group you get locked out of dungeons for a while. And healers can't really do much outside of dungeons so this guy basically couldn't play the game for 30 minutes after getting locked out for a little bit of extra malicious compliance. Our next reddit post is from Hi Guy. I used to work in a cafe as a waitress. My job is your typical food runner and sometimes bus duty for understaffed, which is always. Anyway, one day we had a group of college kids who were mostly really nice, but one in particular was the clown. He started off with dumb jokes,

and when I asked him what he wanted, he responded with, food please, or a cheeseburger without cheese. When asking for drinks, he responded with a nice cup of a water with ice at the bottom, with some of his buddies telling him to shut up and waving me an apology. Well, no problem, buddy. You can think my seventh grade science professor warning us not to lick metal poles when it was cold or it'll stick like in the movies. I went back to fulfill this specific request to the T. I grabbed one of our milkshake tins, gave it a quick rinse and packed ice cubes at the bottom. I crushed some additional ice and added them, allowing the entire thing to form one solid

cold clump and it being cold enough, stuck to the wet interior of the tin. I returned triumphantly, plopping down the tin in front of the fool, water with ice at the bottom as per dear customer's request. At first he was confused as he was the only one with the metal tin, then I hear him silently mutter. Holy cow. But was cut off by the rest of his group's cheer and disbelief that I had conquered his request.

He and the rest of his buddies even took a few pictures of the cup and before leaving, slit me a personal tip as a thank you. Since then, our diner special was ice at the bottom as a running joke and everybody now gets a kick out of it when they see it. Down in the comments, Misha Burns brings up an interesting question. Is this R-slash malicious compliance or R-slash delicious compliance. That was r-slash malicious compliance, and if you like this content, then also check out my Patreon where I publish extra podcasts. Also, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcasts every single day.