rSlash - r/Offmychest My Mom is My COLLEGE ROOMATE

Episode Date: September 8, 2026

0:00 Intro 0:10 Mom roommate 4:29 Monster 10:29 Stall 14:03 Stateless Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Whatever lies ahead, don't change. your morning. Let your morning change you. Discover Coffee Plus on Nespresso.com. Welcome to R.S. Best of Redditor updates, where OP discovers she's dating a psychopath. Our next Reddit post is from R slash relationships. When I was 19, I came out as gay to my super religious family and was immediately disowned. They kicked me out, stopped paying for my education, and stopped talking to me. I literally lost everyone in the extended family. I literally lost everyone in the extended family. I was all alone and unprepared. I was going to an expensive private university and couldn't afford it anymore. I had to drop out and start working full time. At the time,

my friend Claire at the university really helped me out. At the time, I didn't know that she was from a very rich family. She never really showed it. She helped me with small things here and there, allowed me to stay with her until I could get my act together, and she even paid for me to get therapy when I was dealing with abandonment issues from my family. Really, the kindness that she did for me is something I'll never forget. We remained very close friends after that. I didn't go back to college, just kept working at rather lower wage jobs. A few months after she graduated, she asked if I would like a job. She wanted me to be her driver slash assistant. She was working in her own family's business, and her previous driver was a boring yes ma'am, no ma'am, old guy that she wasn't comfortable with.

She offered me a superb salary and benefits, like eight times what I was making at my job at the time, and I accepted. I've been working for her for two years now, and it's been very nice. The workload is low, I drive a super comfy, expensive car. I get paid to spend time with my best friend, and all in all, this is yet another huge favor for me that she's done. Here comes my boyfriend, Jack. He works for Claire's family business. I met him about eight months ago, and he hates Claire. He believes she's a spoiled, selfish girl who's only progressing because her dad owns an empire, as he puts it.

I didn't know that Jack hates her until only a few weeks ago when they apparently had a clash at work. I'm not aware of the details or whose fault it was, since that's not really my job. But I became aware of the conflict. Claire doesn't have strong opinions towards Jack, though. When she learned that we were dating back then, she told me that he seems like a good, hardworking person. Jack told me that he's going to put Claire in her place. I asked what he wants to do. He didn't say much except that she won't see it coming. I kept pushing and he told me. It was basically messing up something that will make Claire look very bad and the confidence of

others in her would take a huge hit. I begged him not to do it as it wasn't just wrong and unethical but just petty. He seemed to have made up his mind and I couldn't do anything to change. it. I really had no choice at that point. For one, I had to do the right thing. For two, Claire has done so much for me and I owe her so much in my life and as a result, I have very strong loyalty to her. I couldn't sit and let something like this happen to her. So I told her everything. She appreciated my honesty and told me that she knows it must have been difficult to do this to my boyfriend and she won't forget it. She took care of the whole thing. Jack was fired. So now he's angry, that I told her. He says that I picked her over him and I betrayed him. I kept telling him that I

begged him not to do it, but he put me in the position of having to choose to do the right thing or keep quiet and let him do something wrong to my best friend. He says he can't believe that I did that. So now he wants me to show him that I love him and that I'm loyal to him by cutting contact with Claire and quitting the job. I don't want to do that. Claire is my best friend and I owe her a lot. I This job is great, and I want to keep it. But I don't want to break up with him either. He made a horrible mistake, and he's angry that he lost it. But he keeps pressuring me to make a decision, and I'm just tired of it. Is there any chance for our relationship? Then, six days later, OP posted an update. Most of you were right. I was being played from the beginning. I confronted Jack about the whole

thing, and asked him if he considered my friendship with Claire when he started to date me. He at first refused to admit it and kept telling me that he loved me, but since we were getting nowhere, he said, why hide it anymore? Yeah, I approached you to get info on her. Do you really think I'd be interested in a waste of clothes like you? Yeah, he said that exactly. He told me that he first started dating me for getting information. Then he used me to help get him promotions, and he made the mistake of thinking I was his when he wanted to take down Claire. He left. So that's what happened. I was played for one and a half years. I'm just happy that he couldn't succeed in hurting Claire.

Otherwise, I couldn't have forgiven myself. I needed someone to talk to after all of this, and that had to be clear, so I went to her flat and we talked for hours about all of it. I was really embarrassed for falling for Jack's BS and putting her at risk, but she kept telling me that she's proud of me since I protected her when she needed someone to have her back. So, yeah, we're on great terms.

I won't ever let this happen again. No more dating anyone who Claire has any sort of professional relationship with. I'll be a better and more loyal friend for her from now on. Yo, what is Jack's issue? I can understand hating your boss. I mean, that's a really typical thing everyone's been there. But this woman does not sound like a terrible person. I doubt that she's a terrible boss. And even if she were a terrible boss, that doesn't come close to justifying this insane behavior. Spending a year and a half in a fake relationship just to get Intel on your boss is nuts. O.P., you get zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving Jack, I think, four out of five buttholes.

Oh, wait, this isn't R slash Am I the Butthole. It's best of redditor updates. Our next Reddit post is from R slash relationships. I've known my friend Kevin and his wife, Emily, since high school, and we've stayed very close. The three of us went to different colleges, but they were all within an hour drive of each other, and we spent a lot of time together. They got together towards the end of our first year and got married soon after graduation. They've been married around six years, together for nine.

After graduating, we all moved back to the metro area where we grew up, although we live about 45 minutes apart. Still, my wife and I spent a lot of time with them. She and Emily have grown to be very good friends and often hang out together without the husbands. Kevin and I also spend quite a bit of time together without the wives, as I was always closer to him than Emily anyway. Before getting married, Kevin and Ingrid, Emily had some early disagreements about children. Emily was very set on having children,

and Kevin wasn't sure that he wanted any. Kevin eventually acquiesced and said he would think about it, and they didn't really discuss it again until after they got married. Around five years ago, Emily gradually started bringing up the fact that she was ready to start trying to get pregnant. Kevin was adamantly against having children at that point, and told her he wanted to wait until he was at a more stable point in his career. He was still at his first post-college job, and while he was making good money for someone his age, the job he was in generally isn't long-term. Think of a field like consulting, where junior-level employees typically have a two-to-four-year shelf life before they're expected to move on to something else. He told her that he wanted to wait a few years,

as the expectation was that she would probably stay at home for a year or two after having the baby. During this ongoing discussion, Kevin confided in me that while the career explanation was true, it wasn't the whole truth. He was still unsure that he actually wanted to have kids at all, and he wanted to put it off until he was sure that he really wanted to. He knew it was unfair to Emily not to disclose his feelings on this, but he was worried about her reaction, given how adamant she was about having children. After much discussion, Emily agrees to wait until Kevin has a more permanent job. Around two and a half years ago, that happens. He took a job in-house with one of his long-term clients and ended up with a small pay jump, much better benefits, a more predictable schedule with less travel, and a lot more job security. Almost immediately after he took the new job,

Emily brought up getting pregnant and Kevin agreed to start trying. As far as I knew at the time, Kevin agreed and Emily stopped taking birth control. Fast forward to the present, no children yet. Up until this point, as I understand it anyway, their only attempts at conceiving have been to continue their normal activities without birth control. Since this hasn't worked, Emily has started discussing the possibility of going to a fertility doctor to see if there are any problems. The women on her mother's side of the family have a history of having problems conceiving, although with eventual success. I'm not sure what the exact issues are, but I know that Emily's grandmother and mother were 29 before they were able to conceive. with both trying since their early 20s. Yesterday, Kevin confided in me that before he left his previous job,

he had a vasectomy without telling Emily. After picking my jaw up off the floor, I started asking him questions to figure out why the hell he would do that. Apparently, after he began to put out feelers for a new job, a process that took about a year, Emily had brought up going ahead and getting pregnant. Kevin pushed back pretty hard to wait, and she told him that was fine.

Evidently, Kevin was really leaning towards not wanting children. I wasn't aware of this, since we never really talked about it after the aforementioned conversation. After he got the new job and they started trying to conceive, I just figured he changed his mind and got on board. Shortly after they once again agreed to wait, Kevin became suspicious that Emily wasn't taking her birth control. He would check on her pill packs, but wasn't able to confirm one way or another if she was taking them regularly or not.

According to him, Emily was acting suspiciously and was initiating intercourse much more often than usual. There was something about her periods as well, but I don't remember the reasoning behind that discussion. Evidently, after considering the evidence available to him, he was convinced that she had stopped taking her birth control and was trying to get pregnant after they had agreed to wait. He was angry, but didn't want to confront her with evidence that could be explained away easily by her. At this point, I don't know if she actually was taking her birth control or not. He could have been right, or just paranoid. Given his lack of trust of Emily and his increasing desire to not have children, he decided to get a vasectomy and not tell her.

There was a point where he was traveling for his job, which happened often, and was going to be a few states away for about a week and a half. He traveled to the city frequently and was somehow able to arrange to get a vasectomy done in that time. The initial trip was supposed to be 10 days, but a weekend snowstorm caused his flight to be canceled, and his employer ended up needing him to stay another few days anyways. Again, I have no idea how he was able to arrange visits to a urologist and a vasectomy, not to mention the follow-up visits. I am also unclear on how long it took him to do this.

The timing worked out to where the soreness and swelling was gone by the time he returned from the trip, and according to him, the scar is completely unnoticeable unless you should. shine a flashlight at the bottom of his balls and look closely. So, in the past three-ish years, she's never suspected anything, I guess. He always had his insurance information sent to his office, had enough spare cash socked away to cover his co-pay, and antibiotics and pain medication, and he changed insurance once he took his new job, so there aren't any records laying around in an online account. So that was all well and good for a few years. But now he's in a tight spot, because if Emily goes to a fertility doctor and things check out on her end,

the next logical step is for him to get tested, at which point it'll be obvious to the doctor that he had a vasectomy. He gambled on the fact that Emily's family has a history of problems conceiving. So maybe there will be issues there to place the blame on. He has no idea what to do, but guesses he can stretch this out a year or two before he has to go get tested. I'm really struggling with this. On the one hand, Kevin is my best friend. On the other, he's being totally deceitful to Emily, one of my closest friends.

I'm not judging him for not wanting kids, but this is something he should have communicated to her before now. If he had talked to me about the situation before he got the vasectomy, I would have told him that he needed to break things off with her and move on if he was sure he didn't want kids. It wouldn't be fair to her, and it wouldn't be fair to him if they ended up having children, by accident or design, when he didn't want to. But that's not what happened. He's been lying to her for years. I can't tell my wife about this because I have no doubt that she'll call Emily and tell her immediately. I'm trying to decide whether I should tell Emily, tell Kevin that he has to tell Emily or I will,

or completely stay out of the situation. I feel bad about the entire situation, and I don't want to break up their marriage or destroy one or more friendships. But I also don't want Emily to waste any more of her time when having kids is such a big deal to her. What the hell do I do? Well, this is obviously best of redditor updates, so there's an update coming. But I got to point out the one thing that O.P. seems to not be aware of, which is there's a timer on this secret. Eventually, this guy won't be able to dodge the doctor visit anymore, and the truth will come out, either because the doctor will tell the wife or he'll have to confess.

And at that point, this douche-wad might just drag O.P. down with him. So, O.P., the very obvious answer is that you should tell the truth because it's the right thing to do. do. But even if that isn't enough for you, you had better do it or you might bomb your own marriage. Because at some point, your wife is bound to find out that you've been keeping a horrible secret from her best friend. And she might reasonably decide that's a deal breaker for her and leave your marriage. Anyways, there's an update. Let's see what happened. I think I've decided on a course of action. I'm meeting up with Kevin for drinks in an hour or so. I'm going to give him an ultimatum. Either he tells Emily within three days, or I will.

I'm also going to tell my wife after my meeting with Kevin, because I can't keep something like this from her and live with myself. I'll try to get her to sit on the information for as long as possible, but if she tells Emily, then I can't fault her for doing what is probably the right thing. I'm going to tell Kevin that I'm telling my wife as soon as I get home from meeting with him, and impress upon him the strong possibility that she'll tell Emily before he has a chance. This will give him an incentive to tell her sooner rather than later. I'll probably ask my wife to let me be there when she tells Emily

if she decides that she won't wait. That way, we can both be there for support, and I might have a chance of staying friends with her after this is all over. Then another update. I just left from talking with Kevin. I took the exact approach outlined in my first edit, and it went as well as one could hope. He was understanding and apologized for putting me in this situation.

He understood my need to tell my wife, and said that he wished he had taken that approach in his own marriage. He realizes he needs to tell Emily and that the marriage is likely over. After some reflection, he thinks this is probably for the best because she'll never trust him again, and he really doesn't want kids. He's going to sit down and talk with her tomorrow afternoon. Then another update. So I told my wife everything last night after I got home from meeting with Kevin.

As you might expect, she was absolutely floored that he would do this to her, given how much she wants kids. She didn't take it as bad as I thought she would, though, which was weird at the time. I really thought her reaction was going to be to say that we need to tell Emily immediately. Drive over to their house in a blinding rage, etc. Instead, she told me that she had something to tell me that she'd been keeping a secret for a long while. Evidently, a little over a year ago, Emily and my wife were discussing Kevin and Emily's attempts at conceiving. It wasn't unusual for them to talk about this, since at that,

point they'd been trying for over a year. On this night though, Emily had quite a bit to drink and opened up to my wife more than usual. Emily was desperate to start going to the fertility doctor, but Kevin wanted to wait because they hadn't been trying for very long. Unless I misunderstood him, Kevin seemed to imply that Emily had only recently started suggesting going to a fertility doctor. Nope, she's been telling him she wanted to go for over a year. My wife asked her why she wanted to go so soon since they hadn't been trying that long. Emily told her that she'd been trying for nearly four years. WTF? The following explanation of this is pieced together from my conversation with my wife, what Kevin told me, and my own inferences. Emily stopped taking her

birth control while Kevin was still at his old job, before he ever started looking for a new one. She pretended to take her pills, hoping she would get pregnant, and she could blame it on the fact that birth control isn't 100% effective. She's stopped taking her pills around six months before Kevin started looking for a job. This is the same time at which she started pressuring Kevin to move on from that job. I guess it took six months to convince him to finally start the process. So Kevin agrees that it's time to leave his job, starts talking with hit hunters, gently approaching his current clients, etc. They have the above-mentioned talk about going ahead and trying to concede. Kevin says no and she agrees to wait. The reason she brought it up on that

particular day is that she thought that she might already be pregnant, given that her period was late and she had been trying for six months. A couple days later, Emily got a pack of pregnancy tests, and three positive results later, she's pregnant. She's excited as hell, but once to wait a bit to tell Kevin, given that they had just agreed to wait to have kids until he got a new job. Man, my wife thinks that Emily was probably around two to three weeks along at this point. About a week and a half later, Kevin is out of state for work, and Emily is planning to spring the news on him when he gets back. He's gone from Saturday night and is supposed to return late on Friday. On Monday night, Emily has a miscarriage. Evidently, this is one of the common mishaps that the

women in her family are prone to. My wife told me that Emily's mother had at least three miscarriages before successfully carrying her first pregnancy to term. Emily was absolutely devastated. She doesn't tell Kevin about it because he'll realize that she hasn't been taking her birth control and shit will hit the fan. She calls my wife who goes over to her house to comfort her. Note, my wife did not know about the miscarriage at this point, just that Emily was really upset over something. Emily only told her the truth a year ago. I actually think I remember what night this happened on because it was unusual for my wife to drive all the way to Kevin and Emily's house to hang out with her. Usually they meet somewhere in the middle. So Emily is odd.

upset about this, but manages to get herself together by the time Kevin gets back. She doesn't say anything about it, but immediately starts trying to conceive again. My guess is that this would be the time where Kevin becomes suspicious about her behavior. She was right that she wasn't taking her birth control, but he only realized it after she had a miscarriage and tried even harder to get pregnant again. As far as anyone knows, Emily never got pregnant again between these times and when Kevin got a Dysectomy. During a routine visit, Emily asked her OBGYN if there were any problems, and she told her about the miscarriage. This happened before Kevin started his new job, and they officially

agreed to start trying to conceive. I don't know if Emily told the doctor that she had stopped taking her birth control, or if she implied that it was accidental. The OBGYN identified something with her uterus that could possibly cause an issue, but said she couldn't be sure from a routine exam. The doctor suggested that Emily see a fertility specialist and gave her a referral. Evidently, the specialist wanted to do the first consultation with both Kevin and Emily there. So Emily couldn't start the process until Kevin was on board with conceiving. So that's the state of things. Emily was lying to Kevin about being on birth control for at least one and a half years. My wife never told me because she wasn't sure what to do. Since they'd officially started trying to

have children by the time Emily told her about all this, my wife decided to keep the information to herself because it didn't matter at that point anyway. I called Kevin and told him about this late last night. He wasn't as upset as I thought he would be because he already figured that Emily had stopped taking her birth control back then, although it was actually six months before he caught on. He was pretty upset about the miscarriage and felt really bad that Emily had to keep this to herself for all these years. As of right now, he hasn't talked to her yet. That'll happen later this afternoon or tonight. Then two days later, OP posted an update. Kevin and Emily talked for a long time yesterday, and they've agreed that it's best for them to split up. Too much damage done, and the lies they

told each other were too big, not to mention the kids' issue. I wasn't there, obviously, but I've talked to them both, and they seem better than I expected. Both of them are really angry, but it's directed at themselves as much as each other. Strangely enough, they were both really glad for my involvement. Emily wasn't even pissed at my wife for telling me about the birth control fiasco. I have no idea whether my wife and I will be able to remain friends with either of them. They were both really deceitful to each other and to us, but I think I'm willing to move past that eventually.

We'll see how this goes. Man, this might be dark to say, but I'm glad they didn't have kids Because between his lying and her lying, I doubt that kid would have had a fantastic life. That was our slash best of Redditor updates. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.