rSlash - r/Pettyrevenge "LET ME ROB YOU OR I'M CALLING THE COPS!"

Episode Date: December 20, 2020

r/Pettyrevenge The lady in today's story is a real nut job. This thief steals from her coworkers, and OP gets sick of it. So, OP comes up with a devious plan to catch the thief red-handed. OP creates a trap wallet filled with glitter and powdered food coloring, so when the thief opens the wallet, it explodes all over her hands! The thief becomes furious about this and demands that management call the cops on OP for not letting her steal in peace! WTF? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Now streaming on Paramount Plus. Hey baby, I hear the blues. It's calling, toss salads, and scrambled eggs. Y'all know how this goes. And maybe I seem a bit confused. Yeah, maybe. But I got you picked. Ha-ha-ha.

But I don't know what to do with those toss salads and scrambled eggs. Kelsey Grammer returns in Frazier. Life's calling again. New series now streaming on Paramount Plus. Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best posts from a cross-reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash Petty Revenge, where a thief gets caught red-handed.

Our next reddit posted from Theotema. This is a funny story my mom always likes to tell. Back in the year 1997, some days after my sister was born, my parents decided to visit my dad's hometown to show my grandparents their first grandchild. They were in love with a little girl. During the time my parents were there, my mom and grandpa were left alone, playing with my baby's sister and talking to each other, and it went like this. My mom said, she's so pretty, she looks like me." My grandpa said, oh don't worry about it, they grow out of it.

This was obviously a joke, but my mother never forgot it. Then after five years I was born and again my parents went to visit my dad's hometown. This time showing baby me and my grandpa absolutely loved me and said, oh my god look at him so handsome and he looks like me to which my mom, not missing the opportunity replied, oh don't worry, they grow out of it. They both laughed at it, my grandpa knew that it was exactly what he said to her five years before and remarked on how she returned the favor to him. Just a little harmless fun revenge from my mother.

OP, have you considered the fact that the only reason that you're alive today might be because your mom wanted another opportunity for revenge? Our next Reddit post is from TX Harley Writer. This was several years ago when I was living at my parents' house still. I was around 19 at the time. I used to drive an old pickup truck, which I always parked in the street in front of my house, since my parents put one car in the garage and the other in the driveway on the other side.

This way no one was ever blocked in. Our old neighbors used to always have large gatherings of family and friends. It seemed like once a month I would come home to find our street, lined with cars all at their house. One week in my parents went out of town, which left the driveway open so I parked in it, because why not? This was on a Saturday and I realized that our neighbors were having people over. No big deal, it happens regularly.

They're polite and quiet. Their guests will sometimes park close to being in front of our driveway, which is annoying when trying to back out with cars, basically surrounding your driveway at all sides. I decided to run and pick myself up from dinner around 6-7 pm. I was gone maybe half an hour. When I got back, I noticed that someone was parked right smack in the middle of our driveway. It wasn't just any car though, it was a G-Wagon. I had seen this SUV several times before, usually as one of the cars parked close to the front of our driveway, but this time they

decided to park in our driveway. Could I have gone over and asked him to move the car in Park Elsewhere? Of course I could have. Did I? No. Instead, I parked my truck across the entire entrance to the driveway blocking them in. After a few hours I get a knock at the door, guess who it is. The car's owner, having the gall to ask me to move my truck so they can leave. I could have moved it no problem. Instead, I told them that since I'd already gone and picked up dinner, I had no reason to leave until at least the next afternoon. They asked if I could just move my car since they wanted to go home. I told them, again, I had no reason to leave, and my truck is really loud, so I

didn't want to disturb the other neighbors by starting it so late at night, and they were welcome to come back for it tomorrow. I left the truck there until noon the next day. I'm not sure how they got home as this was before Uber and there were no taxes in the area, and they were one of the last vehicles to leave the party, but that ain't my problem. They should have thought about that before parking in MY driveway. Man, stories like this always blow my mind, because when you piss someone off and leave your car, how can you possibly be certain that they won't damage the car? Like how did that douchebag party or note that you weren't just going to key his car or

let all the air out of his tires while he was at the party? And likewise, how did OP know that guy wasn't going to do the same thing to his car because the guy knew where his car was? It's a great story of revenge, but I can't imagine pacing someone off and then just leaving my car in their hands. That's kind of just asking for it. Our next reddit post is from Stingsy. My dad works as a landscaper in Desno in the winter. He had many clients in one townhouse community. One time, he had this lady who

was a regular client at first, always paid on time, always polite, etc. However, one time, the lady started to get slow with her payments and wasn't home when he was there. Eventually she fell behind in the payments and when my stepdad went to collect, she had the audacity to say, I had never seen you in my life. She said this in a stern voice, not acting like someone with dementia or someone who genuinely didn't recognize the person.

Also OP clarified that this lady was like 30, so she definitely didn't have like Alzheimer's or something. Afterwards he asked his other clients in the neighborhood about her and they all said that she was insane. Cue the revenge. My stepdad makes it a point to recruit both of her neighbors' new clients. My stepdad came back with this friend after a 1 and a half foot snowstorm. There are two driveways to the left and right of hers with the way the townhouses are set up.

He instructs his friend to blow every inch of snow from both driveways directly onto hers, and they get to work. They purposefully did this when she was home, and she came out LIVED. His friend pretended to not speak English and my stepdad said, probably with the biggest grin on his face, I'm sorry, I've never seen you in my life and left. Our next Reddit post is from Sharkbait. I moved into a shared apartment and never met the guy whose room I was taking over. But he was also selling his bid, so he texted back and forth to settle on a price, etc. I asked if it came with bidding since I just

moved to a new country and had nothing like that. He said it did. So on the move-in day I show up, and the only thing on the bid is this radio blinke that looks more like a Christmas tree skirt and two pillows to match. The kind you can't even really wash and are like a fake silky kind of material. It had tassels. It wasn't warm, comfortable, clean, and it definitely wasn't usable. There wasn't even so much as a fitted sheet left behind. It was like he went to the Salvation Army and picked up the cheapest bedding that he could find. I texted him about it, and he said something along the lines of, well, I said the bed was new. I didn't say the

bedding was. Anyway, what the eff? I couldn't sleep there the first night and went back to my hostel and bought my own bidding the next day. But this guy left an unbuilt Ikea desk in the corner of the room and he said his girlfriend was coming to pick it up sometime during the week. It wasn't in a box, just bundled up and held together with some masking tape so it wasn't brand new. I stared at that thing for days before I decided to actually do it. But I was just so salty about that disgusting bidding. So I took out two key pieces of that desk. Not like a full lig, but not a small, easily replaceable screw either. I don't know exactly which structural pieces they were, but I feel confident that he couldn't have built it properly without them. I had to wait until my other roommates were out to go toss him in a bin down the street

so they wouldn't be able to trace it back to me if the old flatmate asked. Anyway, the girlfriend came to pick it up, and I never heard from the guy again. I like to think that he couldn't use the desk and he knew that it was me, but couldn't prove it and knew that he'd been a dick about the bidding, so he just had to let it go. Bye bye, loser. I'd like to imagine, O.P., that this would've resulted in a fight between that guy and his girlfriend. Babe, why didn't you bring all the parts? Um, I did bring all the parts, babe.

There's no way I know that we're missing parts here. Did you get everything from your car? Yes, I did, and if you hadn't pissed that guy off, you could've come and helped me move it instead of making me do it. Why are you getting upset at me because you screwed up? Babe, come on, I was just trying to save a few extra bucks. Forget it, you can put it together yourself. Business notifications out of hand, Thrive Command Center keeps your customer emails, texts, and social messages all in one place so you never miss a message. Small business runs better on Thrive. Get it free today at Thrive THRIV.ca.

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I work for a supermarket, and for a while a few years back, stuff would get stolen out of people's bags in the break room. It was mostly cash, phone chargers, headphones, little things like that. We did have little lockers in the break room, but they were maybe one foot by one foot and too small to hold anything larger than a medium sized purse. So if someone had a larger bag or even a large puffy jacket it wouldn't fit. I usually carry a messenger bag big enough to fit a notebook or sketchbook in, which was too big to stick in one of the lockers without having it get stuck, and I usually stash it under a coat rack. I hardly ever keep money or anything more valuable than a mechanical pencil in my bag while it work. I keep any money or

my debit card on me at all times, except for one particular day. Before work one particular Sunday, I had to go buy a new television since mine had suddenly stopped working the night before. I must have forgotten to take my wallet out of my bag before heading to work because the following day, I discovered it was missing. However, whoever took it only took the wallet because my debit card, college IG, and my subway card had been thrown in my bag. The wallet in question was a small coach brand wallet, so I can see why they took it, but I had only spent about $14 on it since I got it at a coach outlet store so it wasn't like I spent a lot on it. After meeting with a management in our lost

prevention guy, the consensus was basically, we're sorry that happened to you but there's nothing we can do about it, keep yourself locked up from now on. And so I did, I started locking my bag to the co-rack with a bike lock. The market I work at is a union, so management isn't allowed to put cameras in the break room. So I talked to our lost prevention guy about it a little bit more and asked if I would get in trouble if I were to put a prank while it filled with glitter and powdered food coloring in my back and he said not at all. I also went to the unions to work about it and he also said that I wouldn't get in trouble, but he also told me to be careful.

So I put my plan into motion. I bought a fake coach wallet, some edible glitter and powdered red food coloring. I sold a strip of elastic into the opening of the wallet, then stuffed it with as much of the glitter and food coloring powder as I could so that when the wallet was opened, all the glitter and food coloring would pop out all over the hands of the person who opened it. I then planted it in my bag and waited. I didn't have to wait very long. A few weeks later, I heard from our lost prevention guy that a cashier had been going through people's bags again and fell from my glitter bomb wallet, hook,

line, and sinker. Then she tried to wash the glitter off her hands which activated the powdered red food coloring. She then freaked out when it stained her hands bright red and went to management about it. She wanted the person who planted the wallet to get in trouble for it, but since the wallet had been in another person's personal belongings and the wallet wasn't harmful or illegal, there was nothing they could do to the worker who did it. The girl ended up getting fired for openly admitting to going through other people's bags for money and other valuables, and ended up throwing two other cashiers under the bus for stealing from people as well. They were fired shortly after.

I did get spoken to by management after the fact, since they knew that I had planted the wallet in my bag, but the discussion was more or less. We know the wallet was yours. We didn't tell the person who tried taking the wallet that it was yours, and we're not going to tell you that you can't do that again. Wow, imagine trying to steal from someone else, it blowing up in your face, then trying to get the person that you stole from in trouble for it. That thief is truly living in a completely separate reality.

Our next credit posted from RJ's Beckham. Last week I rented a card to visit my girlfriend out of state. It wasn't the normal type of car that I would get, but since it was warmer and I had money to blow, I might as well do it up big with a 2018 Ford Mustang convertible. The trip was a two and a half hour drive to her, and I know this highway like the back of my hands since I traversed it often. Halfway through the journey, a navy blue charger greeted me and asked to measure dicks. I declined, and he sped up and got in my lane for a break check. I changed lanes and tried to put some distance between us, but he was determined to reenact fast and furious. The kid, probably in his early

20s, gold and hair compressed under a Lakers cap, with who I assumed to be his girlfriend in the passenger seat, trying everything from matching my speed and revving his engines, blowing kisses, and locking eyes with his tongue out, doing what I can only describe as ravenously licking a lollipop. This kept up for about half an hour. Fortunately, he was too focused on me to notice a road sign warning travelers of the state police station a mile out. By then, I had just about had it and wanted nothing more than to embarrass his kid in front of his girlfriend. So I feigned interest in the race.

I revved my Mustang, sped up to put him in my rearview mirror, and made sure that he knows he's about to eat my dust. Sure enough he took the bait and engaged his lead foot. It was along before his tail lights faded into the distance. This police station I passed by plenty of times and there's usually one or two eagle-eyed troopers on watch. Park near the highway entrance ready to pounce. I witnessed a crazy police chase last year with these stages involved so I'm sure they mean business. Once again I passed the station with no irregularities except this time the eagles have flown the nest. A few minutes

later the trees and atmosphere became a wash with red and blue. Cars ahead and behind me slowed to a crawl. My racing buddy and his navy blue charger now got a brother. It's another charger also blue but this one had no intentions of racing. The kid is still in his car as I roll by, and I make sure to make eye contact with him and has now unimpressed girlfriend. And to be extra petty about it, I blew her a kiss. I made it to my own girlfriend's house an hour later, just in time to catch the last showing of Avengers Infinity War. It was a good day.

And down in the comments, we had this story from 350 Shelby. I was in my 68 Mustang convertible, top down, ACDC bling for my stereo, just enjoying the day. I was waiting for the light to change when an obviously spoiled little rich kid pulled up and Daddy's Porsche 911 and started revving and looking at me daring me to race. He didn't look at day over 17 if that. I could hear him talking trash too, which I found amusing. I'm guessing he was showing off for his pretty girlfriend in the passenger side. My car had a 289 high-pot rebuild by a guy who did nothing but build race engines for track use. Anything and everything that could be done to a naturally aspirated engine had been done to it.

I'd spent several thousand dollars on it and the drivetrain and it pushed well over 350 horsepower on a C4 racing tranny with an A9 350 differential. It was a blast and low gear but still very streetable. When the light changed he beat me at the start which didn't surprise me he was a lot lighter and Porsche 911s have decent 0 to 60 times but I caught up and passed him easily. The kit really didn't know how to drive very well, and I guess he tried to downshift and he ended up wrecking the clutch or tranny. When I checked my mirror, white smoke was billowing out of his car as he receded. I pulled into a service station and got some gas.

He limped in, still pouring white smoke from the back of his car. It definitely smelled like he roasted the clutch and blew the seal. He was using the phone inside when I went in to pay for my gas. He was apparently talking to his father and was in tears the whole time. I'm sure Daddy was not amused. His poor girlfriend was sitting in the passenger seat when I came outside. She looked really miserable and embarrassed. I asked her if the car was his dad's and she nodded and said yes really softly. Then she added that her boyfriend wasn't in real trouble because he wasn't allowed to touch the car. I almost felt bad for the spoiled little bastard, but I got

over that in about two seconds. That was our slash Petty Revenge and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day. and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.