rSlash - r/Pettyrevenge Park Like a Jerk? I'll Block You In!

Episode Date: July 16, 2021

r/Pettyrevenge Here's a general word of advice to you. If you drive your car to car repair shop, don't steal a parking space from an exhausted auto mechanic. Is it really a good idea to piss off a car expert, and then leave your car in the hands of a person who knows exactly how to mess up a car? Well, an entitled idiot tries exactly that when he steals OP's parking spot. OP gets revenge in a rather petty but satisfying way! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best posts from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash Petty Revenge, where some entitled parents get their picnic ruins. Our next Reddit post is from Vanity. I was in line for groceries. I'd been making light conversation with the woman behind me. She was nice. I'm keeping an eye on the checker waiting to load my groceries when I hear some conflict in the line behind me. This new woman is now in between me and the person that I've been talking to. The woman who had been there first politely explained that she was in line already. The other lady says, well I didn't see you.

The original lady was being nice and the new lady was aggressive and mean. I button and say that the other lady was here first, but this new woman wouldn't budge. Behind her, I can see the polite lady who got cut off, start to back down. I had just started putting my groceries on the counter when I said to the nice lady, ma'am, you go ahead and go in front of us, we don't mind waiting. The other lady was furious. She ended up leaving our line to get into another even longer one. So I think the logical thing to do would be for that woman to get in front of you and say, oh that's so sweet of

you. Actually, you know what? I don't mind waiting, so why don't you go ahead and go in front of me? Then, as Thanos would have wanted, balance would be restored. Our next reddit post is from wearful soul. This happened a few years ago, back when I was a first year heavy duty mechanical apprentice. I had just started working my shop's evening shift from 12.30 to 9pm because one of our other apprentices had just gone off to school, so I took over his shift. Now at this point we were understaffed, which is why I took his shift. So on this particular Friday evening, at around 6pm, I was all alone in the shop except for one person up front and our parts department, and everyone else, including my boss, had gone home. Our workplace is way too small for the amount of work that we take in. So I had to spend about 15 minute shuffling trucks around just to clear up enough space so I could do my job. Right as I was about to pull him to the spot

that I had just cleared, a customer pulls him to the spot and parks. It's not a big deal, this happens all the time. It annoys me, but nobody ever stops it. So I exit my car and get his attention, asking him politely to move his truck. I have to get some work done. He brushes me off, saying that he just needs to grab

something real quick and it'll be done in two minutes. So, more firmly, I said, can you please move? There's other available parking in the front of the shop. Again, the customer just brushes me off and walks inside. Now I'm annoyed, but whatever. I go grab some water and start collecting an air jack in the stands that I'll need to do the brakes. After about 5 minutes, he still hasn't moved, so I walk up into the store and see him just yapping away with the parts guy. I remind this guy that he's still in the spot that I need, and he just waves me off and says something like, the adults are talking, kid. So I say screw it and go back outside, park the car that I was working on right behind

his truck, and take the wheels off of my car. I had to fix the brakes on all four wheels, which would normally be about an hour, except that during this time I found a leaking wheel seal on one of the wheels, which added another hour. I get the wheels off, the car is on stands, and it's been about half an hour at this point when the guy walks back outside and sees what I've done. This guy starts complaining about how he has things to do and why would you block me in? At which point I looked at him and said, I have stuff to do too and just went back to work and ignored him.

The reason why I didn't just park somewhere else is because everyone in their mother drops her trucks off on Friday night for weekend servicing so the yard was packed. I had already rearranged all the cars to make enough space for me and there was free parking up front that I had told this guy about and he still parked in my way. He ended up coming back a few days later whining to my boss. But once I explained to my side of the story, my boss just told me not to do it again, but he admitted that it was pretty funny. Okay, so previously on this channel, I've said a couple times that it's really, really stupid

to steal someone's parking space. Because yeah, even though you've got the parking space, you've pissed off this person and this other person knows where your car is, so they can key your car, pop your tires, or just do whatever to your car. This guy didn't just piss off a normal person. He pissed off a car repair guy. So this guy pissed off a car repair guy, walked away, and then left his poor defences car in the hands of this car professional.

So what was stopping OP from just like popping the hood, pulling some wire, and then for the rest of this guy's life, his car's just making some weird noise like BAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMB just getting through a heat wave with temperatures up to 40 degrees Celsius in Vancouver or about 104 degrees Fahrenheit. Naturally, we all want to take some time off and cool off at a river or the ocean. My favorite spot for doing this is a nice creek that also has an off-leash area for dogs. While I was there, a family of four that did not have a dog came and set up a picnic and play area for the kids using up most of the shaded area on the side of the creek. They've slightly distanced themselves from the main group of humans and dogs in the hot sun. Since I didn't feel like roasting on the side of the creek that didn't have any shade, I moved over to their side of the creek, which did have shade,

and I made sure that I was far enough away that I wouldn't bother their picnic. After about five minutes of playing fetch with my dog and the family eyeing me up, the dad finally approaches me. Excuse me, but were you planning on being here a while? We came over here to get away from the dogs. Oh, yeah, we come here most days to get away from the sun and to cool off. We usually swim and throw the ball for half an hour. Well, we were here first, and as I said, we were hoping to avoid being around dogs with

our kids in food. Well, I'm very sorry, but in case you weren't aware, this is the only awfully swimming spot that's local. If you go just 15 minutes down the river trail, there's actually a no dogs beach with lots of shade. The entitled dad repeats himself slightly more aggressively. I said, sir, you and your family are taking up all of the shaded bank of the creek and you've spread yourselves out in the middle of a dog park.

I'm not sure what you'd like me to do because I have just as much right to use this area as you do. And we have the right not to be bothered by you and your dog while we're trying to spend family time together. Maybe you should find another place to swim. At this point I'm hot, it's over 104 degrees Fahrenheit outside, and this guy is acting like he owns the creek. I snap and tell him that I will be using this side of the creek, and if they're uncomfortable

around dogs then they should move to the non-dog friendly beach down the trail. I turn and take a few steps away to make it clear the exchange is over and I call my dog to me. He's a good labrador and very friendly, so he doesn't understand when he's not wanted. But the last part made me laugh. After being glared at for the better part of an hour while my dog swims in plays and I read my book, I decide to move on and I have to pass them on the trail. I throw one last ball in the creek, and after my dog fetches it, he trots by them, pauses,

and then shakes off the water all over their chairs and phones. The mom starts sputtering, and I just look at her and tell her that there's a non-dog-friendly beach just 15 minutes down the trail with a smile. Alright, going to a dog park and expecting there not to be dogs is a special kind of stupid. But even then, deciding to have a picnic in the middle of a dog park is like extra strength stupid. It's like, what did you expect? It's a dog park.

They sound like the type of people who go to vacation in Mexico and then complain that there's too much Mexicans in everyone speaking Spanish. Our next reddit posted from Chalk to Storcher. My parking spot for work is in a tiny little parking lot. I pulled in the other morning and there was a guy standing in my spot talking on a cell phone. Lots of people use the parking lot for cell phone calls or to get some fresh air, so that was normal enough.

But this guy didn't walk away from my spot when I went to park. I was very clearly trying to pull into my spot. I pointed my car at him, jester for him to move and slowly pulled up. He made a jester to shoot me away, and then kind of turned around and ignored me. I rolled down my window and politely asked him to move so that I could pull into my spot. He flashed me some douchebag looks, but moved aside. I got into my office which looks out on the parking lot. This guy was leaning against my car and talking on the phone. I double clicked my key button and

the car did that double honk thing. He looked around but didn't move. I did it again and he stopped leaning on my car. But I was so annoyed by this guy so I just kept doing the double honks for my keychain. I did not let up. That guy had to listen to Incessant Hong Kong for about a minute. He looked around, confused and annoyed. I let it go, but I felt pretty satisfied about pedally annoying him. And down in the comments we have this story from Eat Tick. I was parked in a large outdoor parking lot a while back, and as I got close to my car, I saw a group of people talking next to it with one leaning against the passenger door.

As soon as I was in range, I hit the remote start. That guy jumped high enough to make the Olympics. Our next reddit posted from Chelsea Elrick. My mom is a type of person who can never be wrong about anything. She has to be the smartest, most perfect person in the room. If she yells at you for not doing something, but you say that she never told you to do it, she'll say, well, it should have been obvious. If she says something that's wrong, she doubles down and tries to find proof that she's

even partially right. If she asks you why you can't do a simple task, and you tell her that she never talked you how, she goes back to, well, it should have been obvious. She even occasionally flaunted her accomplishments and asked why I hadn't already done as much as she had by the time she was my age. One night, I was petting my family dog on the couch and was talking to her, like you do. And I off-handedly remarked how I can't believe that she's already five. My mom pipes in from the kitchen and says, actually, she's four.

I tried to remember what year we had gotten her, and sure enough she was four. But I was sick of my mom pulling this BS like budding into a private conversation between me and my dog just to be right and put me down. Not to mention, she had belittled me just that morning about not being more like her. So, she wants me to be more like her? Okay, I'll double down like she would. I said, no, she's five. No, she's four. We got her in the

year such and such. No, I distinctly remember that we still had our other dog then, which means she's five. O.P., I am not going to argue, she's four! Eh, agreed to disagree. That set my mom's teeth on edge. You know what, she said, and she was off downstairs. I heard papers flying, boxes being moved, and murmuring and grunts of frustration. My mom is also the type of person to never throw any paperwork away, no matter how insignificant. And she also has a very specific filing system. However, she couldn't seem to find what I knew that she was looking for, my dog's adoption certificate. I knew exactly where that was, because I had been the last one to bring her to the bed,

but it wasn't hidden. The dog's certificate wasn't a manila envelope on the kitchen table, because you'll probably lose it if you try to put it away, just leave it there. My mom would find it eventually. Hours went by, and I got to spend a nice evening on the couch with my dog watching TV. Finally, at about 10 pm, my mom stopped triumphantly up the stairs to the kitchen table and said, ah-ha! While waving the certificate in my face, I simply said, oh, huh, and went to bed. I hope her hours of searching were worth being right. Honestly, OP, this feels like a win-win situation. She got to prove to you that she was right,

and you got to secretly get revenge against her without her knowing that you were getting revenge against her. Genius play, OP. Our next reddit posted from Purple Womit. This happened back in the 80s when women's rights were still new thing in my country, and a lot of the older generation of men were not at all in favor of this. It used to be a thing where certain pubs or rooms in a pubs were men only, and maybe you'd bring your wife, but it definitely wasn't a place where young single females hung out. One day I was out shopping in the city center, and as they say, the heavens opened. It went from being sunny to having sheets of rain hurtling down. I was drenched, and there seemed to be nowhere to take shelter. There was a nearby pub. I didn't drink and I never been inside of it, but I was a legal drinking age. A woman popped her

head out of the door and gestured for me to come inside, saying, you can wait it out in here, love. She seemed kind, so in I went. Immediately, the bar fell silent. It was entirely filled with cap wearing elderly men, and every single one of them was staring at me, a girl with outright hostility. Still, the nice woman was behind the bar, and she jestered me over to a stool in the corner. You can't be in here! A large, red-faced man nearby said, ''Women don't come in here!'' There was a general grumbling of agreement.

''Don't mind them, love. I get to say who comes in and who doesn't.'' The nice woman said. ''Now, would you like something to eat? You look freezing!'' I just nodded, shyly. She settled me with a glass of coke, and a few minutes and much male harassment later, she came out with a full dinner.

Roast beef, potatoes, gravy, roast vegetables, dumplings, the works. It was amazing. Eventually, the red-faced man had had enough. He strode over to the bar and settled into yell at me from close quarters. Except the woman behind the counter stopped him dead with a stare and said, don't you dare! This is my pub, and I'm tired of you and your cronies running women out of here. Now go upstairs.

He sputtered and got even redder in the face, but she folded her arms and off he trotted. Just as he was about to go through the door, she added triumphantly, and you shouldn't expect any dinner tonight either. What, he said, looking truly horrified. You don't think I cooked all that in five minutes, did you? That's your dinner she's eating. It turns out that she was the owner, and he was her layabout husband. They lived upstairs. I passed by the bar a few months later and it was very different. It was open, friendly, there were flowers outside and no old men. Our next reddit posted from Roker Less.

This happened about 25 years ago in the UK when I had bought my first house. We had a driveway that was side by side with our neighbors driveway. Each driveway was long enough to park two cars in tandem, so whichever car was parked first couldn't get out unless the one behind the move first. Our next door neighbors were also a young couple, with the guy being a typical boy racer of the time, and he often has friends around to watch football and have a beer. I'm a big football fan too, so I never minded the noise. However, I returned home from work one day to find one of his friends car parked in my driveway. I politely knocked on their door and asked them to move their car.

They were watching football in the room right beside the door with all the windows open and they were quite loud and rude, telling me to f off. I thought that I recognized the car in my driveway, and when I looked through the window I confirmed that it was owned by someone that I used to work with. So I called the guy out by name, which caught him unaware, and I asked him again to move it. But he wanted to act all macho in front of his friend, so he told me again to f-off. Cue the petty revenge. I simply left their house and parked my car bumper to bumper with his, making it impossible for him to leave in his car. I put my music on, and I simply waited until I heard the door open about an hour later. It was pure bliss,

hearing that guy shout a few expletives, and then knocking my door asking me to move, because he had to leave for work. My simple response was F-Off, I'm watching football. He left on foot, and he came back the following morning, meekly asking for his car back. So maybe it's because I'm a YouTuber who reads stories of revenge and people being jerks and getting their comeuppance for like a professional living. But whenever I read a story like this, literally the first thing that comes to my mind is, of course that guy's gonna block his car in because why wouldn't he?

So it's weird to me that someone would be in that situation and they're like, oh, a false loser, I'm not going to move my car parked in your spot and there's nothing you can do about it so, yeah, like, okay, they've had a couple of drinks, we're not really thinking about consequences, but how could they possibly be surprised by that outcome? Like, of course, he's going to block you in. What could you possibly expect? Am I wrong about this? Like, is this not what 99% of people would have done in that situation?

Block the guy in because he's being a toolback. So not only did he deserve it because he was being a douche, but he also deserved it because he should have seen it coming. Right? Like, if you're walking down this street and some guy's walking his dog and the dog poops and the guy like has a bag in his hand and he picks up the dog poop, if you start fighting with that guy, don't be surprised to be throwing the dog poop at you, right?

That's just a natural conclusion. That was our slash Petty Revenge and if you like this content be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day. be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.