rSlash - r/Pettyrevenge Revenge is a Dish Best Served Rotten

Episode Date: June 7, 2020

r/Pettyrevenge In the world of petty revenge, no revenge is too small! In today's story, OP's friend goes camping and his buddy keeps throwing an old burrito at him. OP keeps is cool and waits patiently. When it's time to drive home, OP digs the old burrito out of the trash and hides it in the glove compartment of his friend's car... where it bakes and rots in 90 degree weather. For weeks, his friend thought something had died in his car because of the awful smell! If you like this video and want to see more, hit the subscribe button for daily Reddit videos! 🔔 Subscribe: https://bit.ly/2E3A8i6 💬 Discord: https://discord.gg/Rtwc9ZC 🎧 Podcast: https://link.chtbl.com/rslash ⚓ Send me a voice message: https://anchor.fm/rslash 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rslashyt/ ♪ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@rslash0 🛒 Merch: http://bit.ly/rSlashMerch Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Welcome to our slash a podcast where we'd the best post from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is our slash petty revenge. My fiance and I had been dating for four and a half years. In that time we bought a house together adopted doggy's together. I put him through school, and we fell even more in love. He's an amazing man and I'm crazy about him. Imagine my excitement that after braving all the ups and downs and watching life unfold as a team that he proposed. I was overjoyed and through tears of happiness I said yes, and of course our doggies were involved. It's a larger, slightly bluish pink amethystone with a halo of topaz around it set in Rose Gold.

I love it. It was perfect. The next day, I was attending a baby shower for my best friend in my hometown. I tracked my way there, and even though I tried to downplay the engagement because I wanted to be about her, she made a mini announcement because I knew people were there. Most people did a little congrats type thing thing which was nice, except for her cousin. This girl, let's call her Amy, is super religious. Actually, everyone from my hometown is super religious.

And I appreciate their faith, but I didn't like her judgment. She's voiced her opinions about how people shouldn't live together unless they're married and all that jazz. So when she's sauntered over, she took my hand in hers and scrutinized the ring. She more or less said that at least he was making an honest woman out of me and that he had taken too long to propose. Then she kind of scrunched her nose at my ring and asked what kind of stone it was, with a little snobby half smile on her face.

She also said that it was generic that he would ask me now that he's graduating because that's what everyone does. I don't know what came over me. I love my ring and I've never been mean to this girl, but I've known Amy for a while and she's always been like this. She likes to say what terrible decisions other people have made and how she always puts Jesus first. So that's why her life has turned out so well.

She says it's because she followed his plan, which ultimately led to her getting married ridiculously young to a guy who really isn't good for her at all, and just leeches off of her. She had to put herself through school and work while he would go on long stints out of the country to find himself and follow God's path, which I really think meant being other women. She married him in the middle of a college year before one of the times he left, I suspect to entice him to come back and have commitments here. Well, I went for it. I said, oh, he waited until he knew he could provide for me. It's a pink

diamond. Her whole face change from smug to envious. She practically threw my hand down and mumbled how happy she was for me. I looked up how big my petty lie had been later, only to find out that, yes, pink diamonds are actually a thing, and the teeny ones are like $10,000. But hey, she doesn't have to know how poor we are. We're rich with unconditional love and loyalty, and that's why I'm happy to call him my future husband. Our next reddit posted from Jehah. I used to work at a large car dealer, and everyone was given a sign parking.

The women usually got the first few rows, as the lot could be a little dark and scary during the winter. So, consequently, the guys got the rows up against the fence further away. No big deal. Anyway, my spot ended up being way down in the back corner of the lot and that was fine with me. Every now and then I would show up and there was a car in my spot, leaving me to scramble for another before work started.

The problem being that the used car salesmen were trying to hide a car they had prospects on over the weekend, and didn't want it sold out from under them until they could show up on their next shift and if they Sunday, they usually had Monday off. Salesmen being salesmen, they would steal a sale from their brother to make a book, but that's another issue. So they would hide cars and employee parking, and then the person whose spot they stole would have to find another spot. Usually at the last minute, and sometimes they would be a dick and just take someone else's

assigned spot. Ca causing a cascade effect. For some reason, they seem to take my spot a lot. The first couple of times I went to HR and told them and they said that they would pass it on, but it still happened 4-5 times a month and I was getting tired of it. On a bright and early Monday I came in and sure enough there was a used car in my spot. I wasn't a particular mood so I grabbed the keys to the tow truck and moved the car way out into the service lot and dumped it into the area our body shop used to store cars waiting for parts. I put

the truck away and then parked my truck and then went to work. A few hours later a salesman came looking for the car and after only finding my scout, he went around asking who owned said scout and finally found me. He wanted to know where his car was and I played stupid. I asked him where was it parked and made him take me to where he last saw it. He said right here and pointed to my space with my scout in it. I said I don't know, this is employee parking and it shouldn't be here anyway. Someone must have moved it. You should go see HR or your manager and complain to them and I walked off.

I assumed he found it because I didn't see him again. The next Monday, the same thing happened, but this time I towed the car and parked it across the street on another dealer's lot. I knew the manager and he said it was fine. I returned the tow truck and went to work. A few hours later, another salesman was back in my face looking for his car. I told him the same thing. I had no idea what you're talking about and I went back to work. A few hours later, HR, the used car manager and the salesman show up in my bay looking for the same car from earlier.

So the manager and HR started asking me where the car was and I asked him to show me where it was parked. We went down to the lower lot and he pointed to my spot with my scout sitting in it and said it was right here. I asked him so it was parked right here in my assigned parking place and now it's gone. He said yes it was parked right here and I made sure to clarify that it was in my spot. Yes in your spot. The used car manager was getting annoyed with all of this. I asked why are you getting pissed at me? Your employees and I pointed at the sales guy, keep parking them here. It's my assigned spot and I've been dealing with this for months. He responds, I'll deal with that. Where's the F-ing car?"

I said it was parked across the street at friendly dealers. WTF, how did it get there? I told it. Hilarity and anger ensued and I went back to work. HR said to please don't do that anymore and to come see them first. All was fine for about a week until the following Monday, and sure enough there was another car parked in my spot. Pist, I went to CHR, and she said she would talk to the manager as soon as he shows.

Tuesday rolls around, and the same car is still there. I thought F this and drove my scout up front, and since it had been raining and the roads were all dirty and muddy, my scout looked pretty bad. So I parked it in the used car manager's spot right outside his office and made a point of parking badly and on the curb with mud clumping on the ground. I went to work. About 2 hours later when that manager showed up to work, I get paged over the intercom. OP, please see the used car manager in his office.

I thought this was going to be good. I walked to his office and he points to my scout. Is that yours? Yes. Why is it parked there? Because even after last week's incident with a towed car, your employees have parked in my spot again. So every time they park a car there, I'll park here.

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Move the car or I'll get it toad. What the F is your problem? This is all your fault for not dealing with it like a manager. If you want to play that way, I'll move my scout, but before I do, look at the rear number on that thing. So what? It's a nice big steel bumper. and what I'll do is just back into my spot and if there's anything in my way I'll just push it backwards. How does that

sound? You can't do that. Well, get off your lazy butt until you're people to stop hiding cars in my f-ing spot. I'm tired of doing this. My car stays until your car moves and I walked out. I got back to my bay, and about 10 minutes later I hear of the loudspeaker. OP, please see General Manager in his office immediately. I walk into the GM's office, and they use car manager and HR are both there. They use car manager looks pissed, and HR looks amused. The General Manager asks what's going on. I told him. I spoke to the salesman and asked nicely. I spoke to H.R. and told her what's going on. And I've spoken

to Commander douchebag a few times and about his people parking cars in my assigned parking. They continued, so I started parking in his spot when his people parked in mine. The General Manager shakes his head and asks the used car manager if this is the case. And he starts to yammer. The general manager just holds his hand up and says stop. He looks to HR and asks if this is true and she said that this has happened. The general manager asks, can you please move your car and I'll settle this. I close the door and I could hear the general manager reaming the used car manager through a closed door 30 feet away.

And down in the comments we have this story from Deleted. I used to work at a dealership as a mechanic, and there was a self-entitled salesman who would park his car in front of the bay doors. No matter how much we complained, he would keep parking in our way. Finally, one of my co-workers got tired of it and jimmy the door. Removed the motor from the car and put it on the dude's desk and towed the car back to the bullpen. The guy got the hint. Our next reddit post is from Minimum Wage. YAH! This happened 10 years ago or so. I was camping with friends outside

through to Colorado. The day after a long night of drinking and bad sleep, I was trying to grab a nap in my tent. A friend of mine thought it would be funny to throw a leftover burrito from the previous night's dinner at my tent repeatedly, giggling every time I cursed him for doing it. Finally, I had to give up on the nap and go the hair of the dog route instead. The next day, the trip was over and we were headed home. Cue Petty Revenge. While my friend wasn't looking, I placed the burrito quietly in his glove box. Now this was the middle of summer.

My friend lives in Denver, where daytime highs are in the 90s. Two weeks later, I get a call from the friend who, after cleaning his entire car, and looking for dead animals in his engine, finally opened his glove box to found as I can't imagine. And the best part is, the second he saw it, he knew who put it there and that he deserved the hell out of it. Sometimes, revenge is best served hot and fetted. And down in the comments, we have this story from Ickle Bunnykins.

I accidentally dropped a pint of milk in my boss's new car when he sent me on an errand, which included getting milk for the office, but also a present for his mistress. The milk had a small hole in the bottom and dribbled all over the cloth passenger footwell. It was hot for once in the UK and he could never get the smell properly out.

And he wasn't due for a new company car for another 2 years. Our next reddit posted from Sergeant Slotter X. I had 2 jobs. One was at this country ice house in the middle of nowhere outside of my city. This place was pretty small but was one of the few bars in a certain area so we would get busy. A lot of good old boys and oil field guys. I worked the door, checked IDs and such and usually broke up fights or kick people out.

The owner of this place was very hands on. He liked to micromanage everything. He didn't want me to kick people out unless they were throwing punches, and even then he wanted me to try to talk to them. He never cut anyone off. He had that always be selling attitude. One night, some trouble happens between some regulars, and one guy tries to hit another guy with a pool stick. I happen

to get hit in the arm, but got behind the guy and put him to sleep. Next day, the manager calls me to tell me I'm being let go. Apparently, pool stick guy spends a lot of money and me putting him to sleep left him bitter, so he called the owner. That's fine. Anyway, the bar has a nice fancy jukebox. If you have the app, you can just pick songs on your credit card and they'll play. If you hit play next on a song, even if they turn the jukebox off, it'll play when it starts back up. It's also unskippable.

With the master remote, you could skip a song, but they lost that remote, so they really can't do much if someone plays a song they don't like. And even if they unplug it, it'll play no matter what when they turn it on. Here's my petty revenge. The owner does inventory every Tuesday night. It also happens to be a busy night because they do pool tournaments and it usually gets packed. So here I thought, I could probably just play the same song over and over and there's nothing they can really do.

I got 20 bucks in credits and that usually gives you about 18 unskippable songs. Plus more depending if the app gives you credits. I picked a remix of Cottonye Joe that comes in at around 7 minutes a pop, usually when the pool tournament started. Two hours of hearing the same song has killed their business on Tuesdays. Even if they unplug it, it'll still play when they plug it back up. I've been doing it for two months so far. Last I heard, they had to buy a new jukebox at a cost of $5,000. I'll probably stop for a month, then start again. I'm just a butthole, I guess. And down in the comments, the appropriately named Pranker Joker has this contribution. I'm wondering if there's some way to upload

some kids' Bob songs to it. Our next Reddit post is from a certain technician. This was a while back when I was in my early 20s. I wasn't a heavy drinker, but when I did, I wanted something nice. My liquor of choice was, and still is, rum. Nothing crazy, mind you, like 40 bucks a bottle, but expensive for me at the time. My housemates, on the other hand, were the party guys. They would line up shots, shotgun beers, etc. Usually didn't bother me since my bedroom was in the finished basement and well insulated, but then I started noticing my rum didn't taste right.

At first I thought it was just me, but it definitely wasn't. They were pouring shots and then filling it back up with water. Knowing how they would pour several shots, then I'll pound them together, I planned my revenge. I bought a new bottle, emptied it into a different container, and then filled it back up with Thai fish sauce. I never did find out which of them it was but nothing of mine ever went missing again. That was our Slash Petty Revenge and today we've got a shout out. I'm doing a shout out

about once or twice a week to fans as a way to say thank you for supporting my podcast. So thanks Shannon for supporting my podcast. I really appreciate it. Hey our slash my name is Shannon and my husband podcast. I really appreciate it. Hey, Arsla, my name is Shannon. And my husband, Michael and I love your channel on YouTube. And now that it's on a podcast, I can listen to it at work and not get in trouble. Also, our dog, Tret, absolutely loves all the puppy bloopers. I am so glad I get to hear this on my phone whenever I'm driving or a

work like I said. You're so funny and we really love the channel. Keep up the great work.