rSlash - r/Prorevenge Hurt Me? I'll Deport You!

Episode Date: September 11, 2025

0:00 Intro 0:08 Pee 2:49 Terrible human 6:28 Jay 11:00 Stalker boss Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Our next Reddit post is from Lava Warrior. This happened about eight years ago. I was part of a Christian organization that would travel to countries and do missionary work. At this time, we were in China, and our team was about 12 people, half male, half female. There were two apartments, one for the men, and one for the women. We were each responsible for our own groceries and cooking, and each received weekly allowances for food, travel, etc. The first few weeks went fine, but we all began to notice some of our food would go missing. We had a team meeting about this and asked whoever it was to stop.

We all had our suspicions to who it was, but I didn't want to point fingers. The person we suspected was Swiper. He was somewhat of an odd duck, but had a weird sense of humor that made most of us laugh. He was also somewhat of a germaphobe, always using hand sanitizer, cleaning, but would still shake people's hands. A week goes by, and food still continues to go missing. Our team leader has a private meeting with Swiper to question him about the missing food and drinks. Swiper outright denies it, says it isn't him. Unfortunately, there really isn't much we can do at this point.

No one's seen him steal. He would usually do it when everyone was out. This went on for some time, and despite questioning Swiper and doing everything possible to get him to stop, nothing changed. One of the other team members was a full-on stereotypical Texan, Peter. Peter was fed up with this and wasn't too fond of Swiper anyways. He decides he's going to piss in his own orange juice, and anyone who steals it will get what they deserve. Luckily, he told the rest of us, except Swiper, his plan, as we often would share juice and food if we asked. A few days passed, and Peter notices that his orange juice,

juice is slowly disappearing. That night, when everyone is in the apartment, Peter says, Y'all do know I've been pissing in my orange juice, right? As he takes a swig of his own orange juice piss cocktail. He honestly just didn't care if he drank his own piss. Swiper then jumps off the couch and starts having a full-blown screaming match and panic attack. Peter basically says, well, don't steal people's food. Swiper eventually ended up getting sent home for stealing from the market, jumping the transit turnstiles, and a few other things. I'll give this revenge story eight out of ten points, six for the just pure revenge, and two for the extra swagger of drinking his own piss just to prove a point. Our next Reddit post is from a salt mouse. So I was

driving my way home, and I see someone parked by the side of the road, waving me down. Enter entitled parent and her piece of garbage kid. Can I help you? I was confused since she waved me down. Uh, I thought maybe you needed some help? Is everything okay? Um, no, we ran out of gas. Oh, okay, that's a pretty easy fix. I can drive you into town to get gas and bring you back here. Okay, she says simply. Her son picking up some of the gravel by the roadside and throwing it into traffic. They were going 60 miles per hour. by the way. Hey, don't do that champ. It's dangerous. The lady had gone to her car to grab her purse, but reeled out of it as I said that. Don't you speak to my son like that? She snapped angrily. Sorry. I get into my car, followed quickly by this obnoxious pair, highly regretting my life choices by this point.

She sits down and immediately scoffs, looking at her feet. Why is your car so dirty? Oh, uh, sorry. I used to put my work boots down there, so it got kind of dirty over time. You should clean it up, you know? I laughed nervously and just nod, pulling away and wanting this to be over with as fast as possible. I left my phone in the center console and she grabs it. Can I call someone? My phone ran out of charge.

That's why we were stuck out there. Oh yeah, go ahead. Either she thinks the person on the other line can't hear her or she's trying to contact them without the use of the phone because she is shouting. Meanwhile, her son suddenly leaps up between the two front seats, looking out the front window. I quickly slow down a bit in shock. Whoa, put your seatbelt on, dude.

The mother just glances at him and pushes him into the back seat. And I have to tell him to put his seatbelt on again before he actually does. I'm effing seething by this point. But I could already see the town up ahead, and she'd thankfully only had a short conversation and put my phone back. We pull up to the pump without issue, and she sits there for like 10 seconds giving me this quick, sideways glance with her arms folded. And I don't even have to ask if this B word wants me to get the gas for her. I know she does. And then I think, I didn't know if this was going to work, but I wanted to try it, and here I am. I get out of the car and grab a 5-liter jerry can that they had for sale, holding it up for her approval, and she nods.

I fill it up and walk to the passenger's side door and open it. What? Oh, I just wanted to know if your son wanted to pick out an ice cream. I know that it's a hot day to day. She looked shocked for a moment, and for the first time, she smiled. The kid practically leapt out of the car, and much to my happiness, so did she, and followed him inside. I walk in and put the Jerry can on the counter as the kid quickly comes up with his ice cream. I say, oh, one second, I left my phone in the car.

It has my debit card in it. I smile as soon as my back is turned to them, getting into the car and casually driving off, relishing in the sight of her running out of the service station screaming who knows what profanities. All in all, it only ended up costing me about 20 minutes of my time, but the feeling that I got as I drove away was priceless. I wonder how long it took them to get back to their car. I got home fine, with a solid gold story in tow to tell my family. Best drive ever.

I only hope the poor guy running the servo didn't cop it too bad from that awful human. Our next Reddit post is from Kelsior 4. Back in the before times, when the internet was still a new thing with lots of potential, I was enrolled at my local junior college. A little into the semester, I moved in with my girlfriend, Lucy,

so we could both save on rent. One night, Lucy said that she invited a friend from one of her classes for a game night. Sounded good to me. We invited a couple of other friends and it was a really fun night. Surprisingly, it turned out that her friend, Sarah, was someone I knew from high school. We weren't close friends, but we knew each other and got along fine.

After that night, Sarah was invited over pretty frequently for dinner, game nights, or to watch a movie. She even brought her boyfriend over a couple of times, Jay, but he never quite fit in. He would be quiet or standoffish, wouldn't engage much, and just seemed like he never wanted to be there. It was clear no one really felt comfortable having him there, but we invited him to be polite to Sarah. Fortunately, he only came over two or three times and found an excuse to refuse every other time. A month or two after all this started, Sarah called my girlfriend crying, asking if she could come over. Of course, we said yes. The story that was relayed was that Jay was getting very upset with Sarah for coming over to our place so frequently,

and he accused her of cheating on him. She never clarified if he thought that she was cheating with me, Lucy, or both. But any option was ridiculous and never happened. But he confronted her and started verbally assaulting her, calling her all kinds of nasty names. At one point, she tried to walk past him to leave, and he shoved her back. This caused her to trip over a coffee table, fall, and get a huge bruise on her butt and lower back.

Lucy told me about the bruise because Sarah had she said, it to her. I didn't see it for myself. Sarah swore up and down that he had never physically assaulted her before and she believed that it was just an accident. But I was pissed. I wanted revenge. You don't mess with my friends and you don't assault women. I wanted to beat the stuffing out of him. But while I'm a very big guy, I've never been in a fight and I'm not a violent person, but a revenge plan formed in my mind. At the time, I was working in the administration building of the school as a student employee. As part of my job, I could access anyone's student records, their fees, and their class schedule. The date was fast approaching that was the last

possible day to drop or add classes without penalty or specific permission. So I looked up Jay in the system, got his student ID number, and the other information that I needed, and put my plan into motion. On the last day to change schedules, I used the dedicated enrollment phones in the administration building and canceled all of his classes. Not only that, but I went through and added every class I could find that had a course fee. If you owed a debt at the school, you couldn't get copies of your transcripts or anything else. Something that I didn't mention was that Jay was a foreign student, and he couldn't stay in the country if he wasn't enrolled with a certain number of units. I wish I could give more info about the fallout, but as I didn't want to get this

traced back to me, I didn't tell anyone, nor did I pull up his records again for a while. I did get a little payoff, though. Sarah was really worried about seeing him again. She had broken up with him the night after he pushed her, as they had an English class together on Tuesdays. She said that on Tuesday he was there, but there was also someone new standing in the class. He was standing because there weren't enough seats. The teacher, seeing that there were more people than seats, did a roll call, and guess who wasn't on it? That's right, Jay. Apparently, after I dropped all of his classes, someone on the wait list got in. Jay tried to argue with the teacher, but since the teacher had the official class roster and Jay wasn't on it, there was nothing he could do. Sarah said that

she never saw Jay in that class again. After a while, I did look up Jay's class schedule, and all of his classes with course fees were gone, but he didn't have any other classes on the books either. I wanted to assume that he was kicked out of school, but I didn't try to confirm it. Either way, Sarah didn't have to have a class with him, and while he probably deserved more, he was definitely inconvenience and possibly kicked out of school. Sometimes I worry that I was too harsh, but then I remember that he deserved it. Mess with me, but not my friends. Our next Reddit posters from deleted. I used to work in a convenience store, and the store manager was a real prick. Misogynistic, offensive, ha ha, cancer is hilarious, creepy, and a downright bully.

Sometime after I left, he was fired after he decided to turn a professional interview with a young woman into a conversation about her favorite adult content. She reported him and he got the sack. Awesome. Anyway, this guy, Andy, fancied himself a real leader. I mean, he wasn't. He said impossible tasks and yelled instructions while doing absolutely nothing in the office in the meantime. I had a colleague, Gabby, who, to be honest, I didn't get on with. However, I knew that at the time, she was having a really tough time at home with her three-year-old son. One day in the winter, it had snowed, fairly heavily. Gabby rang in that morning and told Andy she couldn't make it as she was snowed in. Everybody knew that wouldn't have been true,

and that it was likely she hadn't slept well due to the baby crying and whatnot. But you know what, who cares? She always worked hard and she deserved a break. It was only a four-hour shift, and the store was dead anyways. No customers were going to walk over snow and ice for the morning paper. Plus, we were actually overstaffed. However, Andy had a problem with women. He was always disrespectful and demeaning.

Like the rest of us, he knew that she wouldn't be snowed in, but he didn't let it lie. He wanted to catch her out. Andy abandoned the store, which was serious gross misconduct, and got in his car. He made the 15-minute drive all the way to Gabby's house and took pictures of her car, her front driveway, and the rest of the street to prove that she wasn't snowed in. He then called her into the office at the end of the week for a disciplinary. When she came out, she was in tears. She was on a final warning. Andy wouldn't want a dismissal on his quarterly record, so he basically just threatened her instead.

This didn't sit well with anybody. We hated him anyways, but he went too far making a single mom cry over something so ridiculous. Well, here's the good part. What Andy didn't realize was that on the last work night out, he had drunkenly revealed to the team that he was a serial cheat. He would regularly cheat on his wife of 18 years. also has two teenage sons. He would justify it as having natural male hunger, if you've ever heard a more disturbing quote. Andy used to tell his wife that on evening shifts, he finished at 11 p.m. This was a lie. He never worked later than 9 p.m. After an evening shift, he'd go and screw whichever sidepiece he had going at the time. Well, one evening, he finished up with his side chick at 11 p.m. and he got in his car and started driving.

What he didn't realize was that Gabby, who wasn't on shift that day, had dropped her son at her mom's house and had waited outside the store in her car for Andy to leave. She tailed his car all the way to his hookup house and parked three houses down. She then proceeded to take pictures of Andy hugging and kissing this random woman before he pulled her inside and slammed the door. You can see where this is going. Andy didn't come into work for a week. When we saw him next, he looked broken.

His wife had been anonymously sent the pictures of him getting off with another woman. She'd kicked him out and contacted a solicitor to start a divorce process. His sons had blocked his number and what in nothing to do with him. Of course he knew who sent the pictures, but he had no proof, no evidence. Gabby stayed at that store for another three months before moving into a recruitment position for a pharmaceutical company. As far as I know, she's still there today and doing well. As for Andy, I have no idea whether the divorce went through or not. I blocked him on all social media after I left the company, about a month after this whole thing.

What I do know is that he's a disgusting, reprehensible human being who thought that he was invincible. He thought that he could walk all over people, bullying and belittling as he went. Well, he soon realized that nobody is invincible, and I thoroughly enjoyed watching his collapse. So if guys have a natural male hunger for cheating, which is absurd, does that mean that women have a natural female hunger for following their bad boss in a car and then taking photos of him cheating so that she can ruin his life? That was our slash pro revenge. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.