rSlash - r/Relationships My Boyfriend Said He Wants to Kill Me!

Episode Date: June 29, 2020

r/Relationships_Advice Today's episode is much creepier than normal. OP's boyfriend has a tendency to be controlling and violent, and one day he says that he's "in the mood to kill her." WTF?! What is that supposed to mean? Is he actually serious or is he trying to scare her? Either way, that's seriously screwed up and OP needs to get out of that relationship ASAP! If you like this podcast and want to see more, follow my podcast for more daily Reddit content! 🔔 Subscribe: https://bit.ly/2E3A8i6 💬 Discord: https://discord.gg/rslash 🎧 Podcast: https://link.chtbl.com/rslash ⚓ Send me a voice message: https://anchor.fm/rslash 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rslashyt/ ♪ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@rslash0 🛒 Merch: http://bit.ly/rSlashMerch 🎁 Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/rslash Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

These side marios all you can eat is all you can munch a soup salad and garlic home Welcome to our slash a podcast where I read the best posts from across Reddit today Subreddit is our slash relationship advice and next a word from our sponsors I'm a 32 year old male and I overheard my 32 year old girlfriend teller sister that she's dating down being with me because she makes more money than me and is surprised that I don't have roomates. I make $135,000 a year and she makes $205,000 a year. My girlfriend and I have been together for eight months. So a bit about ourselves. I graduated from a top 10 public university and I work at a great architecture firm in New York City as a senior project architect.

Because I know people will ask, I make in total $135,000 a year. My girlfriend works as a software developer. She went to a decent state school and works at a tech company as an engineer. When we go out for dates in the beginning, I used to pay all the time. Now we're closer to 6040.

When it comes to salary, she specifically asked. I don't like to have that conversation, but hey, I thought if we're gonna get married one day, then it's important to know. When I told her, she got a bit shy about sharing hers, but I didn't mind. And my girlfriend prized herself on being a feminist, so I didn't think anything of it. I thought she was worried she was going to embarrass me, but I didn't care. This is how things went down. I was in the living room working out and she was on her phone with her sister. I was doing push-ups and wasn't paying attention but it went like this. Her sister was going to leave DC to come to New

York City and she was like, oh I don't want to come to New York City. That dating here is a hellhole. This is when I started listening and she said that she has to date down. She said that OP is a sweet guy, but he doesn't do that well. He only makes $130,000. I'm surprised he wasn't living with roommates. She went into other parts and then mentioned this isn't what she envisioned with life. After she got off the phone, I confronted her. First of all, she gets angry at me, saying that she deserves privacy. And I told her that was BF, that she talks about being open, so let's talk. This thing is massively summarized.

We talked for over 6 hours and resulted in me leaving for my cousin's apartment. Long story short, she told me that she loved me and is happy with me. She then says, it's just that if I'm going to judge you by societal norms that we all know is out there, then I'm not doing that well. I got angry about all of this. I told her that I'm doing great in my field, that her field pays more, but that doesn't make her better than me. And that my title is much higher than hers, that I actually manage a team of 10. She starts going off on how computer science brings in a lot more talented people. But it doesn't matter that she doesn't want to have this conversation because

it's hurting my male ego. I got angry and told her that my ego is just fine, that being talked down to is messed up. This leads to more back and forth, and then if she wants to compare me by societal standards for men, then I'll compare her to societal standards for women. That she isn't a catch by any means, and does anyone really want a 30 year old girlfriend? She starts crying and insulting me more. She says that she gave me a shot, and that I treat her like this? I got even angrier, and after this, I just left. I don't know what to say.

I'm okay with dating a woman that makes more than me. Really, I don't mind. But I hate that she thinks that she's smarter and dating down being with me. That's messed up. Also in our conversation, she compared me to some of her exes that had more money than me.

And I can understand that if a girl is used to a guy paying for everything, it can be a bit of a change of pace. I get that. Look, I wish I made enough to where I could pay the bill without blinking. I wish I could, and I hope to one day. But the catch is, these guys didn't even date her. They hooked up a couple of times and they might have taken her to a couple of fancy restaurants. They weren't official. I'm sorry if this came off as ranty. This fight happened yesterday. I'm still in my cousin's

apartment. My girlfriend has called me a couple of times and, this fight happened yesterday. I'm still in my cousin's apartment. My girlfriend has called me a couple of times and I haven't picked up. I don't know what to do. I feel like even if she does apologize, intrinsically, she might just believe that I'm inferior and she has to settle. She might just say some things to stroke my ego and that's it. At this point, is the relationship basically dead? Is it even worth salvaging at this point? I

know I said some mean things too, and if she was to apologize I would as well. I don't want to put anyone down, but at the same time, the thought that she was being snobbish and looking down at me for my financial situation just really irks me. What do you guys suggest I do? Down in the comments, there's this reply from 80s dayglowkitten. I'm a software consultant and former developer. I make more money than my husband, who's a sound engineer. We met at university where we both studied for and gained the same STEM degree. He's far smarter than I am. He followed his passion for his career. I went for money. Her argument that tech attracts more talented people is laughable. Women like this make my blood boil.

Feminists only when it suits them. She's covering up for her antiquated views that the man should be the provider. She's a frickin' sexist dinosaur and you will be well shot of her. Our next Reddit post is from Throhway. My wife and I have been married for slightly more than three years now.

Last Christmas, I found she'd been having a long conversation with a coworkworker of hers in which they talked about passionately hugging multiple times and that they couldn't wait for the next one. The guy said he was going to book a hotel near their office right after Christmas. In this conversation, when he said he was looking forward to seeing my wife, she would reply with things like, I'm looking forward to much more than just seeing you, etc. You get the idea. Overly flirty and sexual. When I confronted my wife, she denied the conversation

existed. After deleting it, she showed me her phone to prove it didn't exist, but I had taken a few pictures. She said that it was all virtual and that they never did anything physical. To prove she was right, she messaged her coworker in front of me asking if he had booked the hotel. He replied, not yet. She then asked if he was really expecting them to meet to which he replied negatively. She promised they would never talk again and I agreed simply because I love her a lot and wanted to trust her, but in my mind, I wasn't completely sure

she'd been honest. For a few weeks, I must admit I checked her phone a few too many times, so she changed her password, which I was fine with because I was probably being too paranoid. This week, I picked her phone up because I needed a phone that had been sent to her phone number. I didn't need to unlock the screen to get it. To my surprise, under the message with the code, there were other messages from the same guy.

One of them was an audio. The second one was a shirtless photo of himself in front of a mirror, and the third one had sweaty and a few emojis with the tongue. I confronted her, since she promised they would never talk again, and she said he just wanted to show her he's going to the gym to show progress. But that the rest of the time they talk it's just about work and then this is just a coincidence. I asked her to show me the rest of their messages but she said she'd mistakenly deleted their conversation history.

My wife said she's going to change this time and that I never really forgave her and that's why she keeps talking to the guy. She says this time she's really gonna stop, but I have a hard time believing it. Or even if she does stop, I fear when things don't go well between us, she'll do it again. I really love her, but I can't keep living like this. Is there any situation in which this can work? What would you do? That on the NFL with Fandool, official sportsfoot partner of the NFL.

Download the app today to see why we're North America's number one sportsbook. 19-plus and physically located in Ontario. Gampling problem call 1866-531-2600 to visit connectsentario.ca. Everyone on your list, if so, moment, if so, dad, even for your sister and your brother Chad, ah shoot, we didn't realize we were supposed to get a gift for our dog, walk her guy. We almost forgot about her, then just got to curb, we didn't expect to get a gift from her, or our cousin like to get his name, he got us something nice, better as it per game. Last minute deals on gifts for people, forgot get faster free shipping at Amazon. So while you were listening to this story, I'm guessing you had approximately the same reaction I had while I was reading it. Which is holy cow dude, this lady is already cheating on you. How can you not see that? Down in the comments, everyone is basically begging OP to open his eyes and eventually

OP post an update. After reading every single comment of the Reddit post, my brain just couldn't overcome the catastrophe and the collapse of the world I built for me in which my wife is my love, my best friend and partner, as well as the person I admire the most. She was entirely perfect and made me happy for many years. I thought no couple in the world could have what we had. We were both very happy for a long time. We were both attractive. We were both inherently good, had big hearts, and were individually

wildly successful in our careers. After the Reddit post, I moved to an Airbnb and eventually with family to think things through. It was a terrible time, but a psychologist helped me recover from a terrible mental state. It coincided with the pandemic hitting very hard in my city. I caught the virus, which didn't help. During this time, we kept talking and my wife was very sorry and continued saying they hadn't met. I knew it wasn't true, but was willing to forgive the woman of my dreams who continued being in the highest altar of my universe.

Fast forward last Saturday morning, I went back to our place, ready to forgive her and talk things through in the most mature way possible. And well, there she was, but I was the one who received the biggest surprise to say the least. The guy was in my house naked, and so was my wife. The guy from the messages, the guy from the pics. The one she said she didn't even like. I caught him hiding in my bathroom as my wife was putting her pajamas on. When I saw him hiding in my bathroom, he uttered, sorry dude. For a second I asked myself, is this where I kill him? But I instantly replied,

I got nothing against you because the guy was just nailing this hot woman. Even if he was doing so in a house full of pictures of me, pictures of our wedding and our families, pictures of my dead father who would be so sad to see how the marriage he never witnessed was going to end. He's always been the reason I tried to make the world a better place. He passed away two months before our wedding. I'm sorry, I still love her to death, but I understand enough is enough. Even if my world collapses, I hope I can build a new one without lies, and in which I'm not just a blind believer under the altar of a fake god. Godspeed.

Our next reddit post is from Throwaway Overdol. I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year now and for the most part he's been absolutely wonderful and I love him so much. We have a pretty intense romantic life and I'm usually really chill with that. However, recently he's been taking it a little too far. Like, I love choking and spanking in the bedroom, but he started doing it in public. Like today, we took our dog to the park, and I said or did something he didn't like, and he spanked me. I was shocked.

Later on in the day, we were doing the deed, and he started to choke me. Again, which I usually like. It got to a point where I properly couldn't breathe, so I used our signal to stop, and he just looked down at me and said, I'm not gonna stop because I'm in the mood to kill you. He must have seen the fear in my eyes or something and he immediately let go and like cradled me and said sorry. I thought it was just him being in the moment so I let it go. But it happened a second time. He was just like staring at me and was whispering sweet things to me and then it took a turn to your mind forever, never gonna let you

go. I'll kill you if you leave. I recoiled because it made me uncomfortable and he like tickled me and told me it was a joke. Like, I love this man, but WTF, how do I bring this up with him? To be honest, I'm tempted to leave. We both don't have dark senses of humor, so I don't know where this came from. How do I address this? What should I say? Down in the comments, it's just reply after reply after reply of sweetheart, these are

major red flags. And so OP posted an update. I just wanted you all to know that last night while he was sleeping, I took my dog Daisy and left my boyfriend in the middle of the night. I met a safe location staying with family, and I've been in contact with the police trying to get an intervention order so me and my dog can stay safe from him. Thank you all so very much for your support and concern. You've all saved my life.

I'm a 24 yearyear-old female, and my 24-year-old boyfriend planned a road trip with me and his three friends, and I've been uninvited. For starters, my boyfriend and I have been dating for four years. Our anniversary was in April, and we planned to do a road trip for it. Obviously, that couldn't happen because of the quarantine. Last month, he brought up the idea of a road trip with me, his friends, and his friend's girlfriend. This would be happening next year. I thought this was a good idea, as I'm friends with his male friend and his girlfriend, but not necessarily his female friend. To tell you the truth, I've always been quite wary of their relationship. My

previous boyfriend cheated on me, and I've still got some insecurities I need to work out. I hadn't heard more about it since the trip was brought up in the first place so I asked my boyfriend if it would still be going ahead. He said they decided it would be a no-girlfriends-a-loud trip. Eh, I was fine with that. Me and him could always go ourselves another time and I know friends need time to hang out without their partners. Nothing more was said about it until today when I happened to glance at his screen and

saw that they'd made a group chat and were talking about it. I also saw his friend's girlfriend was messaging in it. I asked him why she was in it if she wasn't going. He got defensive and instantly turned a screen away from me. I asked him why he did that and he said it's a private conversation. I then asked if I could look through the messages. I found out that she's still invited, and it's just me who's been uninvited. I would understand if she was one of his friends, but she's actually not. In fact, I haven't heard him say one nice word about her. I guess my boyfriend just doesn't want me there, but as fine was someone he dislikes. I feel so left out as I was made to believe I was part of this friendship group, but none of them have even asked me why I'm not going.

I don't know if I've misconstrued the situation and have made a big deal out of nothing, but I'm just incredibly hurt by this. As it's not exactly fair, she gets to go when I can't. I'm planning on talking to him about it tomorrow, but I just want to get advice. And then OP posted an update. I confronted my boyfriend the day after posting this. Turns out he didn't want to tell me that his friend's girlfriend despises me. I was shocked at this, as when we've been around her, she's been nothing but nice to me. He showed me a private message she'd sent to him and she had demanded I didn't go on the trip. She also told him I was cheating on him. I was really shocked, so I messaged her and she said that she was uncomfortable with her boyfriend being around me as I

was really flirty around him the last time we hung out. That's absolutely not true. If I was being flirty, don't you think my boyfriend would have seen that? Plus, I have enough respect for my boyfriend that I absolutely would not do that ever. My boyfriend's told me stories in the past about how his friend's girlfriend is very controlling and paranoid about other girls, and won't even let him have female friends. I just didn't think she'd act that way with me. The only thing I can think of is that when we last hung out, I accidentally touched his leg as we were at a cramped booth together, so she's definitely reaching there.

Also, during that night, she made a huge deal about him messaging another girl so much so we had to leave early as she demanded to go home. My boyfriend kept what she sent to himself as he didn't want to cause any more riffs. He only has two friends. He made the excuse up as to not hurt my feelings. I get it, I do, but I'm an adult woman and I can handle someone disliking me. He thought he was bearing my feelings, but why he thought I would be more hurt by someone I barely know disliking me than from being essentially uninvited from our anniversary trip is beyond me.

I feel as if he took her side in it. I know he hates confrontation and that's fine for him, but I want a boyfriend who can stand up for me. He doesn't even know her for God's sake. I'm assuming he didn't want to lose his friend. His girlfriend is very manipulative. To tell you the truth, I also thought he was planning on hooking up with his female friend. With two guys and two girls going, how could I not think that? I'm not breaking up with him. We talked about it and he's not going on the trip.

He told his male friend the situation and he's likely going to break up with his girlfriend as this is in the first time she's done this. Opie, the way that your boyfriend handled the situation is very suspicious. If I disinvited my wife from our anniversary trip and instead went with another girl, then I would no longer be married. That was our Slosh Relationship Advice, and if you like this podcast, then follow me because I put on new Reddit podcasts every single day. podcast every single day.