rSlash - r/Topposts I Beat My Female Friend

Episode Date: January 12, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:07 Boxing a girl 3:32 Perfectionist pregnancy 6:33 Fired 9:13 Awful person 12:30 Open marriage Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to our slash top posts where OP beats up his female friend, our next Reddit post is from Suspicious Window. Am I the butthole for winning a boxing match against my female friend? After she said that she could beat my butt? For context, she's a 20-year-old woman and I'm a 21-year-old guy. I'm a smaller guy, about 5-7-150 pounds. I've always been kind to insecure about it. I don't like people talking about my height or my size. I'm trying to bulk up to get bigger and stronger, but it's difficult. Honestly, I very frequently feel like I'm less of a man because I'm so much smaller than every other guy around me. I try to not let it get to me, but it's admittedly

a sore spot. I have this one friend, friend Ashley who's taller than me at 5 foot 10 but the same weight as me. She's always prided herself as being the bodyguard friend. I've seen her yell at guys at bars, throw things, and push them. She always claims that she could beat any guy in a fight if she was mad enough. So she's one of the people who test my patients. She makes jokes about my height and size and says that she's stronger than me very frequently. Recently, we were hanging out with others to celebrate the end of the semester, and I got into a tip with Ashley about this issue. This culminated in me saying that if she legitimately thinks that she could beat me up, she could fight me.

I have boxing gloves and a bag in my apartment for stress relief and I offered to get her a pair and we fight. I was only half serious but surprisingly she took me up on the offer. We decided to fight the next Friday which was yesterday. I told her multiple times that if she's gonna fight me I'm gonna hit her like I would hit a man. I also offered on numerous occasions to back out and we could just forget about it just along as she stopped saying that she was stronger than me.

She refused. I made this offer probably around 10 times and she never accepted. Come the actual fight, I made the offer again but she didn't take it. We had a friend who's a nursing student and EMT standing by for safety. She threw one punch and I blocked it. Oh man, I threw two punches, one at her chest and one at her cheek and she hit the ground hard and started crying. Our friends came over to comfort her and they were all mad at me. They said that I was a monster and that I shouldn't have hit her as hard as I did.

I told them that she wanted to fight me and I warned her multiple times. Now I'm being ostracized by my friend group for what I feel is an unfair reason. Yeah, OP, I'm on your side. It's completely unfair of your friends to ostracize you, especially since she agreed to it. You're both adults, you agreed to this exchange, so what's the issue? I will say though, OP, even though you're technically in the right here, you agree to this exchange, so what's the issue? I will say though OP, even though you're technically in the right here, you manage to work yourself into a loose, loose situation, because if she beats you, you'd be the laughing stock, but if you beat her, suddenly you're a woman hating bully who loves to beat up women. So you're a bit of a dumb, dumb for engaging

in that. What you should have done is just say, hey, let's arm wrestle. Because then, when you inevitably won, people wouldn't have been surprised, and people wouldn't be all butt hurt about it. Oh, well, that's just because your biceps are stronger than mine, but my other muscles are stronger. Okay, then let's deadlift and see who's stronger. Okay, let's bench press and see who's stronger. There's like a million different ways that you could have competed against each other in a safer, non-smacking her in the face way, but you went straight to violence OP, which was kind of stupid. Our next Reddit post is from large proposal. My wife is 25, and her pregnancy is making her insane! I met my wife six years ago, and married her almost five years ago. I know it's still new, but we're very happy, have great communication, great

passionate hugging, and constant support. I hear a lot from my co-workers or my friends that were still in the honeymoon stage, and to expect a big turn in our relationship and soon, and I thought that it was just misery loves company. We haven't been actively trying for a kid because my wife is a bit of a perfectionist, and she wanted to wait until my parents retire in two years. So, her being pregnant is a bit of a perfectionist and she wanted to wait until my parents retire in two years. So her being pregnant is a bit of a happy accident. She also mentioned that giving birth in her late 20s has the best outcomes for children.

This is where the problem comes in. She is obsessed with maximizing outcomes. She's always had these neurotic perfectionist traits but this is the first time I've seriously worried about her health. This is an incomplete list of things that I've caught her doing and the explanation she gave me. Last week, we found out that it was a boy, so she stopped going outside because she read that vitamin D deficient women have sons with higher testosterone.

She buys and eats an entire beef liver every two weeks for micro-nutrients or something. I kind of blanked out when she explained that one. She started eating pounds of fruit and drinking gallons of orange juice because she wants to give herself gestational diabetes because it makes babies have bigger heads and bigger brains. She eats so many carrots now, we buy so many carrots. She spent thousands of dollars on fancy filters to minimize fluoride. She refuses to take her prenatals, but she buys these weird liquid supplements on the internet and rubs them on her gums. Look, frankly, I'm okay with all of this. I love her, she's the smartest person I know, and I just wanted to be happy and healthy. But it seems like this is really affecting her.

When she figured out her due date, she started crying about how she's a horrible mom because children with August, Slash, Timber, birthdays are smarter, but that can't be true. She tried to buy human growth hormone from a sketchy Russian website. When I yelled at her about this, she said that she feels bad polluting my gene pool with her dwarf height. I already took her credit card away so that she can't buy supplements online, but how do I deal with this? It's hard because she usually has pretty good reasoning for the stupid changes. She has like a hundred different PubMed articles that she pulls out every time I push back. It's clear to me that she has good intentions, but this is distressing her. She hates the beef liver, it makes her vomit.

She started calling our son Belemia Boy. Should I just leave it alone? Opie, sounds to me like we've entered the territory of professional medical assistance. Your wife needs a therapy or a doctor or pharmaceuticals or something. Our next reddit post is from electrical credit. My boyfriend pulled a malicious compliance move and got fired, but he doesn't understand why I'm upset. Me and my boyfriend are both 23 years old.

My boyfriend, Josh, works full-time as a live sound engineer and I work in radio. They're both graduate jobs and they don't pay a ton, but combined, we have enough to live on and even have some disposable income for takeouts. Last week, Josh was working with a pretty famous band. He had to get to the arena at 7am with the band's ETA being 8.30am. However, there was some issue and they didn't end up showing up until 9.30 with their first performance being at 1pm. Everything was being rushed because everyone was an hour behind. Anyways, Josh was doing some level checks and the lead singer kept asking for his mic to be turned up. He eventually yelled at Josh to turn the volume all the way up and then work the volume

down instead of working it up. The singer made some comments about Josh being untalented and needing this kid to be scrapped, and that we need to get a sound mixer that knew how to mix their band. The singer was being a butthole to everyone, according to Josh. Josh was super pissed about being yelled at and disrespected, so he turned the singer's mic all the way up at the beginning of the 1pm show, which obviously made the first few lines of the song sound ridiculous because it wasn't mixed at all. The singer also yells into the microphone, so you couldn't really hear any of the instrumentation.

Josh only turned the mic down after his supervisor stormed in and made him. Josh was put on the back burner for the rest of the show, and afterwards was told that his employment would be discussed next week. He comes home super proud of himself of how he embarrassed the singer, but I wasn't happy at all and we had an argument about it. Last night, he got the official news that he had been fired, as it had been determined his actions were deliberate and not a mistake. I broke down because I can't afford to carry both of us, but he still doesn't understand

why what he did was wrong. He still maintains that he got back at the singer for being rude and disrespectful towards everyone. He can't seem to fathom that he massively screwed us over. What do I do? Opie, your boyfriend is a doofus. This doesn't make the singer look bad. It makes him look bad because the music wasn't mixed properly.

Proper malicious compliance here would be like, okay, I'll turn the mic up and then he turns it to maximum and then the singer says something and blares the audio into his own ear, which is way too loud and then it causes, I don't know, ringing in his ears or something. That would have been malicious compliance, not failing to do your job massively

and ruining your company's reputation. Josh should be fired and OP should be mad about it. Am I the butthole for telling my roommate that her pregnancy isn't my problem? The girl that I live with, Kelly, is pregnant and she's due early next year. Of course, she seems excited to have a baby, but at the same time, she's been making her pregnancy my problem. I get that the pregnancy

is going to affect her physically in many ways, but Kelly's been a pain in the butt to deal with. I had to thwart all the bananas because she was complaining about how strong the smell was. She isn't helping with cooking and cleaning as much as she used to. Kelly cries about almost everything and it's annoying as hell. Her pregnancy is making her vomit, which I expected. But sometimes the vomiting is so intense. And once she pretty much project how vomited on the floor because she couldn't make it to the bathroom, and I had to clean her vomit up. Over the past few months, she's been asking me to get things for from the store,

even on good days when she isn't feeling sick. When I asked her one day why she couldn't just get up and go to the store herself, she said, I'm not the pregnant one. So this is where I might be the butthole. Kelly's been asking me to drive her to appointments, which I did once, but then it became a constant thing of her asking me and I kept refusing.

This is what happened the other day. She asked me to take her to the clinic, I said no because I was busy that day. She kept pleading with me and finally I had enough and kind of snapped. I told her that she's the only one responsible for her pregnancy and to not make it my problem. So she needs to stop making it my problem and asking me to constantly do favors for her. She started crying and I left because I couldn't take it anymore. I know that I may have been harsh to a pregnant lady, but I don't feel like I need to be your personal servant. Am I the butthole? And then, guys, you're not going to believe this. Down in the comments, someone asks,

is it your child? And O.P.P. says yes and then when someone criticizes him and then when someone criticizes him he responds with again her pregnancy is her responsibility. I'm waiting for the baby to come so that we can be done with this. She's my roommate. I mean that's what she's acting like instead of a wife. I feel like I should have seen that plot twist coming, you know, I've read enough, read it, I'm filled with cynicism, I can, I should have been able to see that coming. But no, that one came completely out of left field. I really can't tell what's worse. The fact that he's being this neglectful of the woman who's carrying his own child

or that he went on the internet and tried to paint him out to be the victim without even mentioning that it's his baby. He's either extremely duplicitous, a liar, dishonest, toofaced, and he misled Reddit intentionally, which I mean, it could be the case, but if that were the case, then why would he reveal in the comments that that is his baby? Or he's not trying to be duplicitous, and he's genuinely so self-obsessed and or stupid that he doesn't realize that super relevant context that completely changes the entire story. Honestly guys, which is worse? Him being a liar, or him being this genuinely stupid, slash self-obsessed? And any event, Opie, I'm giving you four out of five buttholes. You sound like absolute scum of the earth. Our next reddit post is from Green Waterways. I made the

mistake of asking my wife for an open marriage and I regret it. I feel like a complete idiot here. My wife and I have been married for 19 years. We have one child. Our daughter moved out this summer after she enlisted in the armed forces. I loved my wife, but I felt like the spark was gone from our lives. I didn't want to divorce her, so I proposed an open marriage. She was upset initially, but eventually she agreed. I've learned that just because I wasn't as attracted to my wife as I was when we got married, doesn't mean that other men would feel the same way. My wife has had so many men and dates that she doesn't know what to do with them all.

Meanwhile it's the opposite for me. Not only that, but after my wife agreed to an open marriage, I asked a woman who was a colleague of mine out on a date. I was a manager at my job, but I wasn't her manager. We worked in completely different divisions, and our work had nothing to do with each other's jobs. But even though I wasn't her manager and I'm in an open marriage, she complained to her manager and showed HR my messages and I lost my job. I told my wife I want to close our marriage again because I was an idiot for suggesting it in the first place.

She said no, that she's happy with how things are. It's killing me when I know that she's with other men. My brother called me a moron when I told him and said that me expecting my wife to look like she did when she got married made me a dunt. He even went so far as to say that she takes great care of herself and is in great shape for the age of 44. She just doesn't look like she's in her 20s anymore. He had the nerve to say that my wife looks better than me and that I could stand to lose some weight. I love my wife and I don't want a divorce. I never wanted a divorce, which is why I proposed this in the first place. But now she doesn't want to close the marriage. I'm not worried about money

because we both work, but I don't want a divorce. I'm just glad that my daughter is enlisted and isn't here to see our marriage falling apart. Well, Opie, you got exactly what you asked for. It's just, you're not very good at dating. So good luck, Opie. Try not to cry too hard while your wife is getting pounded by another man. That was our slash top post from Reddit. And if you like this content, be sure to follow

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