Ryth - This TikTok Couple Situation Is Creepy.

Episode Date: February 11, 2025

This TikTok Couple Situation Is Creepy. ...

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Be you go, I don't got one. I don't care. I'm okay. All right, people, what's up? Today, I discovered the cringiest couple on TikTok. Now, audience, the subject of today's video is aimless, M-list. I don't know what the fuck that is. For the sake of this video, we're just gonna call them M's.
Starting point is 00:00:20 Anyway, scrolling through this couple's TikTok account, it's honestly like third wheeling a fucking E-Date. The videos that I have seen on my 4U page makes me want to throw up and then eat it, and then throw up again. So yeah, for anybody that is single watching this video, well, you're gonna wanna stay single by the end of it. Let's begin.
Starting point is 00:00:48 Listen, right, as somebody that is currently in a relationship, you will find me dead before a video like this of me gets released. My entire YouTube career is based off of having some pretty good aura. I'm the guy that makes fun of everybody. I'm the guy that's supposed to prove people wrong. If a video ever gets released of me, being some motherfucking sip. Bro, I'm cooked.
Starting point is 00:01:11 I officially will lose everything. I am sitting here watching this shit and wondering why the fuck would it ever leave the camera roll? If you guys think that this video is bad, the videos we're about to watch is much fucking worse. Once again, ladies and gentlemen, you will find me dead before I wear a daddy bracelet on my left arm. Imagine going in for a handshake with your girlfriend's dad and he sees that shit. Oh my God, bro. you're gonna get your fucking ass beat. But seriously though, only two videos into this shit
Starting point is 00:01:50 and I already am cringing my ass off. As I said before, this is like third wheeling, some e-dating wattpad shit. Who the fuck is commenting on this video saying hashtag goals? Bro, y'all horny motherfuckas need to go outside immediately. Maybe, can I have some money?
Starting point is 00:02:16 Maybe I'm just kidding. Okay, listen, I know that we're supposed to roast this guy because he's supposed to have a lot of money, but dude, you don't fucking understand what kind of card that is. For those who don't know, ladies and gentlemen, the Black American Express card is fucking insane. The Black American Express card has absolutely no limit on what you can spend. So basically, ladies and gentlemen, if this motherfucker really wants to buy something, that's $100 million, that Black American Express card will not decline. So, uh, audience, as much as I want to say that this
Starting point is 00:02:48 guy is a cringe ball, he is fucking rich. And there is no denying that. That is a Black American Express card. the fuck I think we stopped dude there is no fucking way an owner of a black american express card actually sounds like that why not what's wrong baby bro fuck off bro if this is what millionaire ticot couples are like i do not want to put my relationship online there's no fucking way that they actually do this shit on ironically when the camera is off i swear they whip out wattpad and read some weird ass fan fiction
Starting point is 00:03:33 and shit and they're like, oh yeah, baby, another video idea. And the worst part about their TikTok account is not exactly their videos, but their fan base. Their entire fan base is unironically commenting on their videos saying this is hashtag goals and shit. Guys, this shit is scripted, at least I hope so. Stop sitting here and commenting thinking that this is what relationships are like. It is not. Nine times out of 10, your boyfriend is not going to be constantly wearing suits and driving
Starting point is 00:04:00 Mercedes-bends all the time and grabbing your upper thigh while driving. First off, most guys are fucking losers. In two, you're probably not the type of girl to pull that type of guy. Simple as that, motherfucker. Yeah, there is no way in fucking hell I would ever allow that to happen. Listen, audience, I'm a car guy. I got two cars right now. I am not going to allow my girlfriend to be driving this shit.
Starting point is 00:04:34 She got a car that's half the size of mine and she already be bumping into shit. And it's like a fourth of the fucking horsepower. Sorry not sorry. I ain't trusting nobody with my fucking whip. Okay, dude, we get it. You're fucking rich and you spoil your girlfriend for absolutely no reason. You know, I kind of find it a little weird that relationships nowadays are just chopped up to how much fucking money you spend. We've already seen what, like three TikTok so far just about giving this girl money?
Starting point is 00:05:10 Like, why do relationships have to be all about money, bro? You gotta make it about love, right? Right? Is that what it's about nowadays? Listen, ladies and gentlemen, I'll put it this way. If you want to be in a relationship, you better be a fucking millionaire. I'm sorry. There is, in fact, an annual subscription to having a girlfriend. Oh my gosh, babe.
Starting point is 00:05:33 I got you a dairy ring with your fucking money. I guarantee, ladies and gentlemen, she bought that shit with the $50,000 that she was asking him for. And guess what? I guarantee later in this video, we're going to have to witness this guy's fake reaction. Oh my gosh, babe, thank you for the dairy ring that you bought with my fucking money. Dude, this shit is so fucking bad. Hey, baby, I have a surprise for you. You know, with the shit I've seen on this TikTok page, I think that would be a pretty good assumption.
Starting point is 00:06:06 With this type of e-dater character AI bullshit I'm listening to, I feel like I'm getting pregnant through the fucking screen listening to this dude talk. I feel like I'm being sexually harassed through the fucking screen. International Men's Day? What the fuck is that? Wednesday, November 19th of 2025. International Men's Day honors the invaluable contributions to men in society, families, and communities worldwide. No one ever gave a fuck about me. Bro, this shit is making me want to puke as I'm watching.
Starting point is 00:06:50 Is this what happens when you have all the money in the world that you just couldn't give a fuck what your digital footprint is like? Because personally, I don't care how much money. I have. I am not risking my fucking aura for this shit. I've always thought that family channels and couple TikTok accounts were fucking stupid, but this shit is another level. What the hell? This is gonna be you. You're the best, baby. Now we have matching dairy reels. Now I just need one more for the middle finger. Bye. You're not going to you anymore.
Starting point is 00:07:20 Bro, somebody please make it stop. This shit is so fucking cringe. Why are people watching these videos and thinking that this is some hot erotic shit? that actually happens in real life. I will die on this hill, ladies and gentlemen, telling you that this shit is scripted. Because I pray to God, this is scripted. Because if this shit is not scripted in that this shit is actually normal among couples,
Starting point is 00:07:44 I think I'm gonna have to unsubscribe to my relationship today. Because clearly I must not be doing something right. Dude, this shit was sponsored by Watpad, bro. Be a good girl while I'm gone tonight. Bro, shut your Discord, E-Kitten ass up. that these two motherfuckers were watching Watpad every single night. They see some weirdo shit and they're like, oh my God, we gotta recreate this.
Starting point is 00:08:24 Bro, I fucking knew it. Bro, there is no fucking way you have a daddy bracelet and you're dominant at the same time. With a combo like that, I just think that you're interested in the same sex. I think I'm done with this shit. Honey and subscribe to the channel for a part two on TikTok couples. With that being said, I'll catch you guys. Later.

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