Sad Boyz - 9 Year Old Accumulates Generational Debt

Episode Date: September 18, 2026

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Welcome to Sad Boys and podcasts about feelings and other things also. I'm the pumpkin. I'm the spooky scary guys. Are we too early to start doing the corny? Here's my Twitter name for the month. It's something scary. Oh, I remember when people said that, did that.

It was when people used Twitter. Now it's mostly bots and angry people. Oh, that's right. What's up? What up, kid? Nothing. I've been thinking about lunch. recently and how much I've looking forward to it.

Yeah, this morning I was like, damn, it's going to be awesome in a few hours when I ate lunch. And then maybe yesterday, around the same time, same thought process. Yeah, exactly around the same time. Good routine. That's the healthy, yeah. How are you?

I'm all right. I had some stuff I can't really talk about on the show. Because it doesn't only, it involves other people. Okay. But I, maybe I'll talk about it on the Patreon. Oh, shit. Or like even just say you that. Oh.

Oh. Yeah. Well, I, and it's, it's that people can probably maybe infer what it is, by the way, I'm talking about it. It's a kind of thing where when you tell people, they get worried or they are like, oh, are you okay? You've been listening to Ed Shearer. Yes. This is a lot of jelly roll. And I am so fine that people don't believe me.

It's tricky. Well, I never believe you about anything. Yeah. Why? You're a liar. Just as a matter of fact, he's right. Every single time the past two weeks, Jordan has told me any sort of fact. I go, no.

Because he's been lying a lot again. He's been lying. I've been getting a little ambitious with them. What we're doing? We were playing this by the other day. I talked. I told you the backpack kid exploded. He was killed in an explosion.

That's... Because I just wanted to see... This was the genesis of me finding out you didn't know who the back kid was. Right. Because of what happened to it. It's what he was carrying in his backpack. Oh.

I'm getting ready to... You know, when this comes out, I'll be in Baltimore. That's right. My first Pokemon Regional. And I am not prepared. How do you feel? Bad, but it'll be fun.

I feel bad because I haven't, like, I'm not ready yet. I still have more preparing to do, but I'm excited to have fun. But this, you're, you're not Jarvis ready. But, but I, you might be normal human ready. Oh, no, no. I think. Like you, you like, not to tell you who you are. Okay.

But you like being an expert. That's true. And anything below expert, I think, is uncomfortable for you. That's true. And I need to, I'm looking over the next couple of days to develop some comfort. One nice thing about this, though, is it does come with, like, grading. Yeah, yeah. Like, there is actually a result that isn't you.

And no one expects anything from me. Yes. So that's fine. I think if I just go and do it, that'll be a success. But, you know. When it's something, I think maybe part of what's been fun about VGC stuff for you, if I may tell you who you are. Oh, yeah, please.

It has, it's tangible in a way that developing other skills isn't. Yeah. Just because it's literally your competition. Right, right. And there is a community in, it's kind of like if you like get really into Dark Souls, that's the game. But then there's the law videos. Right, right, right, right. And so you have like this.

And then once you're burned out on like, I'm trying to harness this thing. I didn't climb ladder as much I want or it's like, don't see what I want. Now I can detach and actually just enjoy this completely. Completely separate but related piece. Yes. For a little energy. I think something I'm looking forward to doing is I've got, I'm making a bunch of spreadsheets of data that I need to memorize.

That's the stuff right there. Because I want to memorize like some, some calcs and stuff of like how much damage do I do into this guy, that guy, at a range. And that'll, when I have that down, I'm not confident in my team, but I'm using a team that, other friends are using.

And so at least there's like some shared, like we can share notes and stuff. So I am hoping that, but I don't have a lot of comfort with that team yet. And that's where the not feeling ready comes from is because I just don't have a lot of reps with the team. But now, between now, we're recording a little bit earlier than normal.

Between now and when I leave, I've got Hank Green something worth knowing event on Wayne tomorrow, tomorrow Wednesday and then I leave on Thursday. But other than that, I'm going grindo mode. No comment. I have, seems insane to not reference that while you were saying that a man floated

into the view outside. You're what's thinking of the thing? Oh, there's some electric or like a, the power company is outside working on electrical lines. He's been a thing that makes him look like Bowser Jr. That's right, dude. Kill him.

He's, there's a guy in a cherry picker floating into the sky. Jacob, can you Google Bouser Jr.? Yeah, bottom left? Yeah, that's what he looks like. He was floating around. He's like inside of his little, his little flying like cup. However, now that the, uh, the Lord has left my vision cone, uh, floated back up to heaven. I will say you entrusted me with a quest while we were in San Francisco.

And it was to be to be the archivist of how you felt in that moment. Oh yeah. And it was a knowledge that there's going to be a little bit of a treadmill. Yeah.

But that you should appreciate not just where you've come from but how much you are enjoying it. That's true. Like actually, it is actually fun. It's true. I am having fun

because Pokemon's fun for the whole family. I also think that I'm doing some Um, I, well, okay, there is, there is a slight bit of, I wonder if I'll feel these nerves. Because I'm probably going to have to play on stream because like when there's like a random creator, they're like, oh, well, let's do that. And I, and I think that'll be, and I might like record some side content like interstitial, like between games type content. And that'll be fun. And I worry, I wonder if I'll get nervous.

I actually don't think so as long as I get all my practice. Yes. Like, certainly not in the moment. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And yeah, I should be able to lock in. Though I did get pretty nervous during the Wolf tournament. But I think I'll be even more. He was a mere Padawan to where you are now.

Right. But his midichlorian count was high, but his knowledge is very true. He is, yeah. Execute order. I mean, you were fucking idiot, stupid. Execute order 6-7 Okay

That's May Has anyone I know I don't know That was off the top That could be the last one We might have cracked it

Might have locked it in There was a thing that came across my desk A meme It was a clip from the It was a tweet actually Me opening a big silver dish Like I have a post for you below Yes yes of course

I get my you know like some people Have their news like like rich businessmen have their newspaper delivered by like a paper boy or something. You have a folded up post that gets thrown to your front door. Yeah, someone prints out the Twitter feed and puts it on my desk. Socially awkward penguin. A warm, freshly photocopied Twitter feed. Ah, a photo of success kid.

How curious. I wonder what he's done today. I believe it's a child who has started a Minecraft YouTube channel and used. $118,000 USD of YouTube ads from his father's business credit card to advertise his channel. Mighty Mike. No. So message from dad. Mighty Mike plays is over.

Oh, no. Today, I have some sad news and it's not going to be me explaining. It's going to be my dad explaining. It's going to be the end of Mighty Mike plays. Hey, everyone. If you don't know me, I'm Dave. I'm Mike's dad. So it's so funny to have this over Minecraft footage.

It is very funny. So it ain't over yet. I also do think that something's very cute about the responsibility to share with the audience. Like you could just like close up shop. You could post a text post. What's crazy is there spending $500,000 to advertise this video? Right, right, right. One last ride.

What does 180 grand get you? 10,000 subscribers. That's true. That's true. He lost 200 on the. That's how I got my first 10K subs. It's a cool 200 grand. Like, is that, are they talking about like the, this plays as a mid-roll and you have to skip it? I think so, yeah. I think so.

And I'm sure it's not cheap to advertise in the Minecraft vertical. Damn, dude. I mean, I'm, you know, maybe I'm a little out of touch. Oh my God. Mighty Mike 6-7. Look at the bottom of right-hand corner. I'm back on his side. Yeah. Actually, like, genuinely, hey man. Did you not like maybe they didn't do it in one do you know what I mean it wasn't one payment

They didn't do one payment of a hundred yeah I can say how long How did they not notice until it got to 118 grand someone at the company needs the notifications on there's a parenting fail There's a point to business fail Maybe devil explain because when when dip when Dipper like peed on the floor it wasn't like his fault You know what I mean? Why didn't you open? should know better. Why did you use the toilet?

But what about when Dipper charged 180 grand to your credit card? Entirely my fault. Yeah, that was true. Treats. I shouldn't have set up those buttons that would allow him to do that. Actually, if Dipper spend that much money, it would be to have a lot of water. Yeah, it would be like a truck backing up with like, into his mouth. I will say as a kid when, when I had my YouTube channel at the right page of like, what, nine? What's up YouTube? What's up YouTube?

I made like a Facebook page, you know, like for my channel. And I, it was like, boost this post. Right. And I was like, okay. Okay. And I did it. And like later it was like, you owe $24, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, no.

Retroactively. That's like if you close the app, it doesn't exist anymore. Yeah. And that's what I did. And I never paid $24. Mr. Zuckerberg, I'm leaving that status up. You do not have a right to use my likeness. Oh, I'm $24.

You do not have a right to transact from my credit card. All right, let's hear what dad has to say. If you don't know me, I'm Dave. Okay, no, we don't know you. I don't know your kid. I don't know you or you. Well, I guess now I know him. No description, by the way.

Message from dad. Doesn't need it. I realize that a lot of people we're actually telling him that, you know, your parents will find out about this and et cetera, but I haven't been really monitoring the comments like that. He's nine. He's pretty tech savvy. So we just thought he was having fun. He's nine. He's pretty tech savvy. I got called into the office at work. I walk in and we got the corporate manager.

We got people from finance. Oh, my God. Oh, it was like, it was like a place where he was an employee. This is the perfect crime. I was thinking like, oh, is this guy like he's like a, like a fight eye, like a white combinator guy or something? Wait, this is so much better actually. Wait, but what company is it? Because imagine if it's like Lockheed Martin? Then this is maybe, this is the perfect tribe.

They just have him killed. And in that case, Mighty Mike is a fucking kid. No, honestly. Dude, shut out. MM67, my goat. FM 67, anti-establishment, nine-year-old. Did he say the comments were saying that like, oh, your parents are going to find out of it?

So has Mighty Mike been saying, yeah, I've been using my dad's credit card to pay for these videos? I do think that's what it's implying. Like, he's like, anyway, today we're going to make a house. And hopefully my dad doesn't find out that I've been, using his business credit card. Anyway, you guys see the new episode of Paw Patrol? You guys see the dynamo movie?

I love the idea of a kid in like a group chat. Like, dude, did you watch it yet? No spoilers. No spoilers. No spoilers. He's a dog still. There's a fire in the Paw Patrol put it out. Basically asking me to explain why there's $118,000 missing from the company card that was assigned to me.

I didn't really have an answer at first, but once we saw where all of the actual transactions were going, I kind of connect the dots. So basically here we are. It's not that much money because of this motherfucker is Canadian. And so that is less in dollars. I can hear it in him. I can hear it in him. But I do love sub chat given the context of this video.

Sub chat. Sub chat. What's up in Bader's. Scurt, skirt, scurt. Accidentally defrauded Lockheed Martin of 150 grand. My freaking owned me. Well, he's got more subs. Locale, check the, well, I guess I don't want.

Playing Descender. Wait, so the dad was... 40 minutes. Wait, playing... Is it not bothering anyone else that it's over? It's not vertically centered. This is my plight. That might be just postmodern or something.

I don't know. The playing Descenders with my dad. So, dad's on the channel. That's what he found out, I guess. That's why he said, if you don't know me, I'm Dave. Or whatever. He's like, if you didn't watch our last upload, I'm Dave. Sorry, the end of the channel.

Next video along the, I accepted my faith in Snow Escape. I think we, I mean. Subscribe. Yeah, I was going to say, everyone should subscribe. Hopefully watch some videos help him get some of that money back. Yeah, we got to get the ad revenue up. We got to get this guy in the photo program. Yeah.

Wait, if you scroll up to the very top, his channel description is, what's up, chat? Yes, dude. I love that. Oh, wait. I'm a nine-year-old. old gamer dude who's this is so I remember being this child. I'm a nine year old gamer dude who's obsessed with exploring the epic worlds of robots and Minecraft like seriously obsessed. Ha ha. On this playlist, you're going to see super fun epic gaming adventures, awesome builds and crazy

challenges that'll blow your mind. So if you're a Roblox and Minecraft fanatic just like me, let's go on this gaming adventure. This is actually so cute. That is so cute. It also kind of reads like an email we would get to like the business address. Like if you're ready to level up your gaming. Also, a hundred in eighty-two videos, Mighty Mike has been gaming. Respect. Let's go by popular.

Please don't tell me it's over is the most popular. Oh. Whoa. 240,000. This is where all of the money went. Oh, yeah, because it qualifies as a view. Yeah.

Respect. I mean, for people who don't, you know, this isn't their like full-time gig might not know, you typically get about $5 of you is more or less the one-to-one so I guess they're positive

Mighty Mike made billions of dollars actually Hey what's up by YouTube this is your dad Dave on I just want you to let you know we're now trillioners I love I love

Minecraft Targur Part 1 wait for end Whoa wait till my dad finds out This episode is sponsored by Chubbies The leaves are turning Do you see that? Do you hear that? I do spinning around

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Now back to the episode. Respect your thighs. Respect, dude. I mean, I feel kind of bad for the kid because I, It's like, this is like a seasoning on top of something he's very passionate about. It's like kind of a, kind of a, coming the way. But at the same time, like, his dad kind of great vibes from him, considering the circumstances. Given this, it is funny to, because you have to imagine that none of the viewers other than us of the Mighty Mike channel are going to know anything about businesses, spreadsheets or anything.

So Dave's context is completely meaningless to anyone. And if he was paying to have random people, like, see the things, those aren't returning viewers anyway. Yeah. So my thing is, is Mighty Mike getting in trouble? And that's why he can't post videos anymore? He's grounded. Yeah, it's like, so can he come back at some point when he's 10? We got to let him game out.

I guess we got to watch the it's over video in full to see. Oh, the Mighty Mike plays post, I'm in big trouble. That rules. This is a high aura family. This is so funny. He says away with words. That's cute. I mean, kids, they really just, they have no filler.

You know what I mean? Yeah. Old killer. What's up, chat? It's over. What's up, guys? I'm dead. So awesome.

Is up chat. I have some sad news. My dad's here to explain. Hey, what's up? I'm so straightforward. I am going to jail. What's up gamers? dad's here today to explain.

We have a very special guest. Yeah. You might remember him from our last video where we played Descenders or whatever. You might remember my dad. He's the co-CEO of Chase Bank. He's coming through for a little wrap. My dad, Jamie Diamond,

the CEO of JP Morgan Chase. What's up guys? I used the business. I wanted to make sure I was iced out for this. So I bought four Rolexes on my dad's credit card. Like who's paying that off, I wonder. The business.

Where's the T. I would imagine. Dad. They could work something out where it's like, oh, this is an unauthorized use. Put the kid in jail. Blood for the blood gone. I think that's the one thing we can agree on is the kid needs to go to jail. Regular adult prison.

Regular adult jail. Jail is a good teacher of children. I feel like it's a movie starring like The Rock or Dave Batista where a nine-year-old who gets in. trouble and goes to jail for gaming too hard. But friends, it's an unlikely friendship between like Dave Batista. Like the kingpin of the jail. Becomes a kingpin of the prison.

He turns out of like, hey, new fish, you don't want to talk to Boulder over there. And it's just like, yeah, Dave Batista is like chewing a rock. Yeah, his name's Boulder for sure. The other thing, okay. So I think everything's fine because the fact that, like, it happened to a business and not like, if it was like his dad,

That's personal card seems like a pain to figure out, but because there's like this layer of business, I think everything's going to work out. It should be at least a bit of artifice, I guess. Oh. A whole spreadsheet, huh? Me and my wife. Yeah, no offense to Dave, but also, wait, the company should have had an alert. What do they do? Someone should have done something.

It was like, when we had to expense things at Patreon, it was like a pain in the ass. Yeah, it was like a, we went to top of a volcano. And you'd get like a message from like the accountant or whatever, and it'd be like, Hey, just asking about this expense. Well, you know, there was a 99 cent fee on a lunch you got for clients. We don't have a YouTube channel. So why is it? Where are we paying for YouTube ads?

Walking and presenting the scroll that they put out for him or whatever? This actually makes me think that he racked up all these charges in one month because it was over three weeks. Yeah. That was the gap between dissenders with my dad. Because of the fact that when I worked at SFM, we had a department credit card and a lady forgot to change over her Amazon when for personal stuff. And we got a department wide email that was like, hey, there are some unaccounted expenses on the card. Can everyone like double check?

Yeah. You know, so I think at the end of the month, someone checks all that stuff. I think people just don't know that if you buy Logic Pro X in 2017. on the Patreon credit card and then quit that job a year later and never mentioned it. You can just keep the software. There's all kinds of stuff you could do. You could also like buy back your company laptop for like what it was insured for. So I remember when one of our coworkers quit, they like got a new laptop right before quitting and then like bought it back from the company for like $500.

And it was like a $4,000 laptop. I was like, oh my God, you're a genius. That's the move. 39,300 Canadian dollars a week. Respect. I mean, we don't know that this isn't.

The gaming adventures they demand a certain level of quality. That's true. Okay, me and my wife have had a serious discussion. We are getting a new kid. Trading this one in. Is Mighty Mike plays actually over for good?

Maybe. Wait a second. I take it back. He's clickbaiting, like his own... Like, what is happening? Jervis, they're going to make. some revenue back. Dave, are they gonna get the clicks?

Hold on. Dave is like, yo, hit up our Patreon. We have a GoFundMe. What's going on, guys? Looks like there might be some delays, but if you guys hit that subscribe button, there's a good chance that we will be back. Dad is like, if you stay to the end of the video, I have a surprise. Leave a comment, you won't believe what happens next. My child bankrupted us.

Surprise ending. That honestly is like a family channel YouTube video concept. Yeah, they could be... The hard launch of the family channel. Don't do that. I'm okay with a kid having a faceless YouTube hobby by themselves.

The second it's like family content, jail. Just immediate jail with Boulder. All three of them go to adult jail. They get a jail. I mean, I do love, I mean, this video, my name of my place is over, was uploaded 15 hours ago, 18,000 views. He's gone up to

11.6,000 subscribers and all the comments are from like two hours ago. And I'm like, this guy, this could like... This is huge. This is like a genius marketing stunt. All right, let's do what dad's saying. You know, we're going to set up some real, like, actual parental controls, spending caps. Yeah.

No more safe payment information on any accounts. Why, okay, why are you telling us to this, first of all? Sure. Second, fucking duh. Hello? I was actually curious, so I'm glad he's telling us. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, it's, yeah, it's good context for us recording a podcast.

It's also good to know that they didn't think to do that beforehand. That's what I'm like You didn't have parental in 2026? This is, I feel like Close to Oh, someone stole the TV. Why didn't we install any doors?

Yeah, no doors. Oh my God. How'd that happen? Okay. So we've learned a lot I've been talking with with mom and we're gonna install doors in the building. We're gonna put up some curtains. Yeah, we're gonna put up some curtains. Hey guys two months later, what's up? Turns out the curtains very soft. I'm gonna get the tattoo of my credit card number removed from my forehead.

I thought that because I put it backwards, people wouldn't be able to figure it out. He wouldn't be able to read it, and then I looked in a mirror and I realized it read perfectly. Something about him spamming crouch while. Is he playing while they're recording the audio? Because they hit this like stressful moment

and he paused and then just there had to be like some sort of conversation where it's like, son, do you have a Vod that we could put? In the background, do you have some gameplay we can run while we have this very important discussion? Let's get something good, you know. Or is it like his dad's letting him play one last time before he goes on punishment? One last ride?

One last treat. I'm trying to figure out if this is a situation where it is such a fuck up that, again, maybe Dave is realizing, like, I can't fully scream at my kid because I let him get away with spending $118,000. Like I did something that he's biologically at that age incapable of conceiving of. And so I'm like, was there a moment, you know, like before this video where like he was really mad or is he just a really kind and understanding person altogether? Because this video, I do. I am glad that it's like they're being understanding about it. It is also funny that like I think that there's something to like they're respecting the clout of Mighty Mike.

he's got 10,000 subscribers. He has a responsibility to this audience. He's referred to his son twice as Mighty Mike. When we punish Mighty Mike, we're actually punishing each and every one of you. And we don't... If everyone pitches in $100, we'll be able to pay back my boss

and I'll be able to... Mighty Dave will be able to keep his mighty job. Destinely, Dave, will not be unemployed. I do wonder, like, you know, he's saying, like, he needs to be held accountable for his actions. So there has to be some kind of like, no Minecraft for a month or whatever. No spending money on YouTube for two days.

Hard cap of under $100,000. This is unironically better than the Logan Paul Japan. Apology. Yeah, my God. Much more convincing. If only there's gameplay, like, to watch. The apocalypse could have gone so much better if there was a dress to impress under these things.

subway surfers. I've made a consistent, repeated lapse in judgment. Oh, fuck. Like, dies. Anyway, yeah, sorry about the video. Almost saved. Let's see what he, yeah. Yeah. It's almost embarrassing to.

I'm embarrassed for Dave that you were telling us this. Like, this should have been a foregone conclusion. Look, I get it when you're nine, all that stuff is kind of important. You see, you know, other kids your age. Wait, it's important to me. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Yeah, first of all, first of all, first of all, views are important to us.

It's my job. Second of all, what sort of hype house is Mighty Mike in? Where he's like all of his nine-year-old friends have more subscribers than him. The hell is he your reality TV show version of high school? Yeah, he goes to YouTube Elementary School? YouTube Elementary? Maybe, I guess maybe he means followers.

Or maybe he does mean subscribers. I mean, it's possible. Maybe he's in some sort of competition with like Mark down, Mighty Mark down the street. Wait, who is he? But maybe before the payments, he had nine subscribers.

We don't know. Yeah. The kids hated him. Videos from up to four weeks ago, we're only getting like 60 views. Which is, I mean, that's pretty good for a nine-year-old.

So if his friends had more, they're probably getting 70 at least. Oh, yeah. And it's keeping up with the Joneses. See, that's the thing is like, nobody, everyone's so envious and this industry is so jacked up. I bet they're the ones that reported him to his death.

That's funny. They were like, this is not real. This is jacked up. We've got to call, we've got to call Lehman Brothers. I need to reach out to Wells Fargo and let them know. This is 2008 all over again.

I guess so much money. So much money. It's so much money. It is like, it is an unfathomable. Like, I just remember like it was pulling teeth to get like one month, which was $5 of Roonscape membership.

when I was a kid. I wanted to play all of the puzzles in Club Penguin, and I was a war getting those pounds. And just like the sheer disconnect of like $110,000 or $118,000. God, I just saw the people out there that had to fight for their right to get a membership to puzzle pirates. Yeah. Adventure Quest.

You know who you are. All right. Let's continue. You do. You see, you know, other kids your age. They have more subscribers and views. So I said, all right. Let's set something up.

I think I put like $20 into a small ad campaign just to get like one of his videos in front of like a few people. I think he's from Pittsburgh. Or fuck this guy. I don't change my mind. Yeah, it's like sounding a lot like it's his fault. What led to the company? Because I feel like, okay, I get the nine-year-olds are tech savvy and stuff,

but I'm like, did his son, like does his son know like the billing address? Not like social engineering. Yeah. That might be a thing where it's like in Google. You know, he saved his credit card information so he could just auto. Yeah. And so that's what I'm curious if what he's going to. Yeah, okay, it goes pinning, it goes live, there's a budget, blah, blah, blah.

Huge mistake on my part. Turns out he was watching a little more closely than I realized. Oh, he's a genius. Basically, he had like gone in there and uploaded his own campaigns and stuff. Oh, hell yeah. Okay, so confirmed was the comfort? caught then. 100%

was the company cut. And then also, okay, you set that, I don't know, man, get a note push notification, please,

of any kind. Maybe he's from Chicago. He went up there. That's, because he's stupid? No, no, no.

His accent, he said, I put it in there. He's not using T. I did not think. For a second, I'm like, we know.

Oh, yeah. I didn't know. I do love that Mighty Mike was behind him. Like, got it.

He's back there with the Facebook glasses. I don't believe that that's what happened. I don't think that he like photogenic memories. Yeah, yeah. I think he's just a smart kid and can fool around with computers and figure out to a campaign. I think you left it. He said, go ahead, daddy, like recorded on OBS. Like the screen.

Basically, like when he set up the ad campaign for him, he used his personal card. but he was logged into his digital wallet that has all of his cards in there. He was watching a little closer when he used the computer later. Wait, so literally, this is like, it was like, it's getting declined. Let's try and, let's try to, like,

Dad, what are you, Brokey? Like, let's try another card with $5,000. Yeah, what the hell? I've hit my limit. No, no, no, let's continue. One of the true story is that like, the dad knew the entire time, but because his son called him a brokey,

he's like, I'll fucking show you. The concept of a child Getting like a decline or like a credit limit reached or something on a card and just going to the next card is so funny to me. If that path was in front of me and I was nine years old, there's absolutely no reason I wouldn't do this. This is very similar to like when they talk about like AI agents going rogue and like this is the paper clip. Yeah, they just don't have an ability to like conceive of what's wrong morally. Nine-year-old AI same thing. Same thing pretty much.

Because like there is, certainly financial education is important at any age. But I think it, we also have to remember that like conceiving of non-physical, non-present things is, it's so hard. Especially when you're a kid. I mean, adults now can end up in severe credit card debt. Oh, yeah. Because it's abstracted. Yeah. Even if they know it's abstracted.

This is like, just, fuck. Like, this is, I think, comparable to if he, he'd, like, he'd, like. logged in and then like watched, I don't know, like a Elsa Spider-Man video or something. And then it turned out that cost $100,000. Why would he know what that means? Yeah. Why wouldn't he just say, oh, in fact, this is a thing. I remember like sneaking into my brain a lot when I was a kid was if this is such a bad idea, why does it let me?

Yeah. Because you think the world's there to help you. Honestly. See, this is, I. You try to buy like a new iPhone. It's like, sir. that's not a good idea based on your income. Are you out of your mind?

We can, I'll get you one. I'll just give you one. I think, you know how like, first of all, we need finance classes in school. And some high schools have that kind of thing. And it should cost a lot. That's too late. It is.

I feel like kids need to learn this stuff in like fourth grade or something. And I feel the same way that I feel about. sex education. If you're... And it just goes off the rails. Or what? And I feel the same way about Mormons. You're probably thinking your kid is thinking about money and sex later than they actually are.

Like they probably have thought about it. Long before words. Like there's like there's so much thought before you are taking kids about money at 15. Oh yeah. They've thought about... They have watched you for 15. years, they have thought about money before that moment. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, they know, like, before I had any conception of, like, me having money, like, independent of my mom, it was, well, what, I'm not allowed to get this new video game. We must not have $39.99. Yeah, yeah. Not we must not have enough worth $39.99 is too big a cut of it. And then it's like, okay, well, that's like four orders. That's like four orders of fish and chips from this place down the street. Big fish.

Now closed. More pond. There was a... Yeah, brother. That's why I had to leave. Yeah. Oh, sharp. A big of shark.

But I, um... Yep, the... I was like, well, it's four orders from there. So I guess we must have like five orders worth or something like my brain. You can only afford four meals. You do it in like, uh, Dave and Buster's points or whatever. Yeah, yeah. I think it's a, I mean, you know, I don't know if tech savvy is quite the term, but kids do know how to log in.

Yeah, I'm trying to think, like, maybe it's the guilt that I hold in my heart. But like, I remember when I was 11 and I was like, I got like permission to get a month of membership on RuneScape and then I like bought like a song on iTunes and stuff. It's like, I guess I could have done more, but I was like, that would be bad. I'd be like shot No, it's something you can understand Then it's something bad to mess around with And then you actually learn what it is now it works Hopefully at some point

But my I had a friend who I like so desperately wanted Them to get the same Modern Warfare One I wanted them to have the same DLC And their parents just wouldn't let them Understandable this was an online only friend Scottish guy Steve In case anyone's Scottish probably known

Godish guy Steve probably met him Scottish Steve is a Minecraft channel for the nine-year-old. Well, actually, I'll push back on that. I'll say it's a bastard from Glasgow who kept the credit card information that we supplied as a gift so he could buy Battlefield-1943 or whatever it was. And then a couple months later, you see, oh, he's been doing little transactions. He's been my little bits of DLC here and there and my mum's color. Oh, shit.

Which, no shit. That's like what sponsors do. But my mom was so dumb for letting it back out of that. But she was like, you know, good faith, sweet. So I can see a world where like, yeah, like, hey, would you like to save this credit card information? Yeah. One, a year ago, you were like, well, yeah, that'll be so much faster. Select, done, never uses it on their Google account.

And then their kid's like, okay. I feel like I'm giving my kid like a prepaid card with like $5 on it. Yes, yeah. And then I'm like, you figure this out. I remember when I first got my iPod, the white stick. Oh, the iPod shuffle. Yeah. And my mom, you know, you had to basically go on iTunes and buy songs for 99 cents.

And so I would get like a $15, $20 iTunes gift card for Christmas. Oh, my God. Those were good as cash back in the way. And I had to choose. It's like cigarettes in jail. Which 20 songs to listen to for the next year. That was a thing. And then the life hack, by the way, that I developed.

as a poor child was you could check out CDs from the local library. And so I would go and I would get a Taking Back Sunday album and then I would scan it with the Grace Note database or whatever and recognize the tracks. But then iTunes did created a thing where they wouldn't let you upload. This was after a period of time. They wouldn't let you upload songs that weren't like purchased from iTunes. I don't like ruined my life. There was another thing that you could do where.

and this is me being, this was what I did as a technologically inclined to child was like, Russell's iPod, even though the like data was like, like, um, obfuscated and like the files were like XB3.mp3.

I like found a way to like take all of the media from Russell's iPod and put it onto mine. And like even though the files were named whatever, all the metadata inside the file was still the same. So then unless it was something that was bought on iTunes and had DRM associated with it with his account, I could like listen to all of his music. This is exactly the reason that like gamified education could be so effective.

Yeah. You just need the right incentive and like framing device. Not hard to lock me. If I got all of the first guerrillas EP because I like climbed a big tall ladder, I'd be doing PE every day. Yeah. I'll be locked in. Arctic Monkeys album just because I did a front flip.

I remember I also. What school are you going to? Pirated... I think I've maybe said this on the show before. I want to say I pirated the killers hot fuss at middle school, and I emailed it to myself one song at a time. Nice. So I think in my email is like every single individual MP3 sent in like a separate email.

I want to make the most findable paper trail of my piracy. I signed each one with my Social Security number. This is holding today's newspaper. I did this of my own volition. My parents' solution to any of us wanting some subscription online or, you know, there were four of us, four kids. And so if we go out to, say, an amusement park and one kid wants a soda, then all four kids want a soda. If one kid wants a shirt, all four kids of it. So their solution.

You got a white, big shirt. The solution was very funny where my dad opened a debit card for each of us, like in our names. and we got like a monthly allowance. So if we wanted something, we had to use our own money. And if we use all our money, sorry, it's gone. I mean, make sense. I had a debit card at a young age, too. Yeah.

And like, so like that's how I got, that's how I would have like my Tune Town membership, you know, my club penguin stuff. Yeah, it's like because you have to become a little like manager of your, you're a little finance manager for $9 or whatever. And then like, what's helpful to learn that at a young age? Yeah. And it also made you realize like, do I really want this item? Because again, amusement park example, your sister. getting a shirt and you're like, oh, I want one too.

You have to use your own money. And you're like, oh, well, I would rather have the money for something else. Like you learn that at such a young age. And then you can like, you can't have everything that you want. You can compartmentalize that into telling your other sisters like, doesn't she look ugly? I do think that I don't know anything about parenting, obviously, but there has to be something to communicating to a child that resources are finite.

Yes. And like, because I... And to not be afraid of that. It's just... reality to be aware. Yeah. And that's the thing because it's like I would ask for everything that I wanted because I didn't know that there was a limit to like it felt that me not being able to have things was

an arbitrary decision that was being made rather than like a functional like limitation of you must not understand how good this thing. You would be buying it for me if you got if you could only see. If you could only see. My older brother was a fricking scammer and schemer and we would be. Each get allowance. Warren Buffett. I mean, he truly, okay, we would each get allowance.

Let's say we each got $10. He would be like, well, I want to buy this CD and it's more than $10. Let me borrow $5 from your $10. I'll pay you back. You know, I'll pay you back with interest or whatever. And I'd be like, okay, great. Never saw that money even. He would just steal from, and I'm four years younger than him.

He didn't steal, you got finessed. You got played. I got played. I was an idiot. He'd be like, look, I'm building a railroad in Peru, invest money in it, and then runs off with my money. He's like, I'm a temporarily embarrassed billionaire royal. I'm a Nigerian prince.

I'm in the hospital. pit and I have surgery. And my credit cards declining because my son bought too many YouTube ads. He would do the same thing with Halloween candy. We would all go trick or treating and he'd be like, oh,

you have like a bunch of Reese's. That's so cool. Give me half of your Reese's. Later on, I'll buy you Reese's from the store. But you're not going to eat all these reases in one go. He's like selling

futures that we'll like never Yeah. Got a real nice set of mini Snickers there. Maybe we spread around amongst us and you do me a favor of something comes back. And then me, my brother and sister he'd be like

let's pool our money. This is Bernie made off. Like literally. My mom is kind of the same way. I think he inherited my mom's schemer, skimmer vibes. But he'd be like, let's pool our money and get one thing we can all

share. Guess where it lived in his It's good something we can all share shorts for me. Yeah, on my PS2. And then, like, why do you have an NWA album that you didn't have before? He loved NWA. Well, you just like the lyrics. He also loved two live crew. I don't know if you ever listen to their albums, but they are dirty.

I mean NWA as well. That's satanic. Nairdwells with attitude. Anyway, let's continue. Turns out a nine-year-old gets access to to an ad account with no limits. And the credit card, it just says approved every single time. No matter what, he does not, he does not think that what he's doing is wrong.

It's like, so anyway, I feel like he's placing too much blame on it being a nine-year-old and him not doing the communication. Yeah, I think, uh, I think nine-year-olds could like remember conversations. It's like, it's not like, uh, he's nine. He couldn't like, into it the financial implications. It's like, okay, teach him. Money. I think he thought you just had enough. I don't imagine.

Well, and it's like you have to teach him these things. He's not going to just learn it from existing. It's like a Pokemon, you level up and you get a new move. Financial literacy. I do think there's something to that sensation of like, and it's different culture, culture of culture, I guess, but that sensation of like finding out, like realizing that the country hates you. And granted, for different people, different ages, a lot of people can be naive about that well into their adulthood. but like you grow up especially as like a margin in a marginalized community or with just noticing

the people around you are getting things you don't have or having experiences you don't have or not having negative experiences you're having then it does kind of unlock that you like now have access to oh sometimes things are different oh I see so not everyone's on my side by default but if you just like you're a kid you shouldn't really have to wrestle with that right Like as a nine-year-old But the idea of having to be like He's not ready for this conversation On a macro level

What he's ready for is not being able to do this in the first place Right And I don't know if Stopping his YouTube channel for a while Is like the right lesson to take away from that Like Not parenting advice, certainly Just like sad bummer

What if he did the thing London's parents did Gave this kid A bank account started teaching him about finances and like how to make a budget and that sort of thing. How to like generate some following as an influencer. As a family vlog. Go through his analytics.

Okay. What's your attention rate? That's important. It's not just about views people. You don't have to go to school every day. You're turning purple. I can finally say that my first YouTube upload I did buy ads to try to get it up to a thousand views because I was very self-conscious.

Old were you? 14 or something? And your Canadian dad was furious. Oh, oh, yeah. I thought you meant you're dancing. Oh, I didn't have money when I was a child. But when I was an adult with a job. But I had someone's business got. When I was an adult with a job, I said, yeah, we're getting

a thousand. No channel of mine's going to have 750 views. We're getting that thing to a thousand. You're a mighty Mike? You're a very mighty Mike. You would. And my car does decline, baby. Oh, shit does, does run out. Oh, my God. $180,000. That's what I keep thinking about is like,

20 grand would be like, oh my God. How could this have happened? How was it this unmonited? Okay, it's unmonited kid on the internet. This does, by the way, I, again, am not a parent. So I, like, it's not really my place to judge. However, allow me to judge for a second. Well, it used to be.

And then you got sick of it. In the Dipper grew up. In the Dipper's independent now. He has his own house. I have impenness syndrome from my second. dog, who's upstairs. My nest. I have as a non-parent scene,

countless stories of children like doing micro transactions on the phone and stuff. And so I'm like, okay, well, this is like a risk factor that like, I feel like you have to do some extra, you know, work to make sure that you don't fall into that trap.

It's built for that. It's like, you know, the 99% of the money that Jetpack Joyride makes is kids and the whales, the addicts, right? Yeah, yeah. It's like that same degree of trust.

of people are like, why does the house always win? That's not fair. Yeah. Like the casino feels rigged honestly. It is a thing where it's like, also if my child is playing a game where it's, um, you're about to like cross the finit. It's like, it's like, imagine you're on a Mario level one, one and you like are about to jump to the flag and then it pauses and it's like, ooh, so close.

You can watch five ads or, yeah, you can watch five ads or just hit continue and we'll charge you a thousand dollars. I'm like, oh, $1,000, but five ads. Five ads, that's so many. You probably make $1,000 watching ads. You think, you don't think five likes us a lot. Imagine five ads. In fact, this, because this video is performing,

get back to the channel right now. Get back to the channel right now. Get uploading, do you make more things. I quit school. I'm really trying to hold myself back from how I would like, solve this problem from as a parenting standpoint. I'd be like, okay, we're going to, we're going to turn this into a teaching thing.

Let's just continue. It's like you catch your kids smoking, so you make them smoke a whole carton. Make him make the money on it. No, no, make him spend $500,000. Oh, my God. Yeah, you make him earn $118,000. You're going to be in those freaking minds. Yeah.

Oh, you're going to be in the mind. All right. Because I get a message today from work, you know, hey, can you stop by the office? We need to talk to you about something. There's a bunch of people from corporate. There's like financial people. There's some finances sitting. on the laptop, they slide out

this table, full breakdown of ads spent from like the past three weeks. Hey, sorry, pose. What the hell is this kid doing? What the fuck is this kid doing in game right now? This is one of those things where

former NFL coach Mike Tomlin Mighty Mike. Of the, yeah, of the Steelers. Just like, he's like doing broadcasting now for the NFL and said that he has like a Minecraft world that he's been working on for 12 years with his

And apparently his kids have grown up now and are like, you have to show the world this is like crazy Like he like got into Minecraft with his kids. That's good this is why parents need to get into Minecraft with their kids because you were punching stone You got out this kid man this is not what you this is the Minecraft equivalent of like shoving your hands in your pocket like shuffling your feet on the concrete Like you don't even yeah you have no you don't even have a Pick act you don't have any durability on anything and you wouldn't see the hunger things but I'm like why is he not getting any, his hunger's not going down. Oh, peaceful. Well, tell you what.

See, I only play on like the real modes. He should be learning resources. Frankly, he should be understanding finances and resources. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. Learn something, dude. We're not here to freaking build.

You make him speed, road. The Underdragons coming to your real house. I don't even recognize these modes because they're not the ones where shit's going down. And you've got to run from the zombies. Anyway, come check out my channel. Peaceful, dude. Defiant day.

What about when the sun goes down? Okay, you can't turn earth on peaceful. You got to chill out. We're going to build a city. All right, continue. And he asked me very calmly, which honestly, I've made the whole thing worse, is like, hey, can you explain the $118,000 that's been spent on this account?

And I'm like, you know, I'm staring at it because in my head, head, I'm doing the math. You know, and it dawned on me, like, oh, crap, this is is something my son probably did. Oh, crap. Do the math. I'm like personally, like, I'm having a personal crisis at that point. They did the math for you.

Yeah, that's kind of the problem. It is so funny to imagine that he's explaining this to children. They don't give a shit. I know. Like, I'm like, it's like, imagine you're like talking to it. It's like the, uh, doing a visit at an elementary school, like reading to children and the story is about how your dad had to go to a scary business meeting. And one of the kids, this is not interesting.

One kid brings that hand, like, but who is in the room? Yeah. What kind of roles? What are people from corporate? I don't think Mighty Mike is, or sorry. I'm sorry. I don't think Dave, daddy Dave is envisioning his audience. Yes.

He's doing talk therapy to the microphone. Honestly. He needs his own. Yeah. He's trauma dumping. He needs sad Dave Sad Dave's YouTube Hey what's going on guys

Yeah so I lost my phone Yesterday I got it back but for a while I felt bad Unfortunately I got in I got in trouble with corporate I will also say that if anyone Does understand what he's talking about Jail immediately

Why are they watching this channel You're not to be here What if a kid is like Oh Dave that's really rough I know with my kids But I'm like I asked If I could look at the breakdown line by line, and that's when they saw it.

It was all spent on, like, YouTube advertorials, titles like Mike, Epic Roblox. Corporate flu? Actually, I don't, maybe corporates in the same building, but like, I'm imagining they're flying in from Tokyo. Yeah, there's a, imagine you're like, sorry, I got to catch a flight. I've got a very important meeting. I hear that I'm going to be seeing some pretty big figures. Yeah, there was a, yeah, I got to deal with this situation, a nine-year-old charge us 100 grand. I'm heading to Singapore.

My kid bought too much DLC. One of my employees said, Dave, is. Could have been a Zoom call is all I'm saying. Could have been an email, really. I hope they canceled the card. Yeah, but I'm curious, like, what to, let's keep going, Dave. Maybe we played at two X-Bs. Continue, Dave.

Please, Daddy. No. Stop. This is not like a ha-ha, funny story. Everything worked out, fine kind of situation. I mean, not yet at least. There's a real genuine chance. I'm giggling.

I don't know. I end up personally having to pay some of that or all of that back out of my pocket. Yeah. I mean, we're not some family with six figures just seeing around. But I feel like, okay, wait, there should has to be a way of, there has to be a way of resolving this. I guess, well, maybe what they're,

what he's fighting is the fact that the company just isn't going to help. And now, and now I'm mad at the company. Yeah, I mean, the whole time. Because I would look at everyone in that room and be like, looks like you're burning a lot of time in this. Look at all the salaries in this room. It's an expensive-ass meeting. This is a tough one. I see you have lobster for lunch.

Yeah. Yeah. You flew in from Tokyo. Also, I'm kind of like three weeks. Yeah, I don't know. I'm thinking about a lot of things. I'm like, is there one company card? If there's not one company card that's shared, then why is there even a limit of this high on an individual thing?

I feel like there's a lot of guardrails now because now I'm like, okay, there's some parenting guardrails that need to be put up, but then there's also some like business management guardrail. If your company is this mature, I guess once a month they see,

they find a figure, they write it down, they show it to a man and they say, what do you think? They go, it's a number, like the Will Chamberlain 100 point game.

They go 100? They're like, okay. Let's say he, okay, we know nothing about sad Dave. But I'm on his side. I'm on Dave's. I was only critic,

I'm emphasizing Dave in a parenting context. In an abstract way. In an abstract way as a non-parent. Now that corporate is being a problem, I'm team fuck corporate. My problem is like if my kid figured out how to like build a series of platforms, that a block say, and got up to the top cupboard and ate like a bunch of candy and it made them sick, I'm like, shit, I'm going to have to make sure that doesn't happen again. But I didn't anticipate it.

And that's just what happens when you have kids. You're not going to guess everything. If that then cost me $180,000 and I had no option to get out of it. Okay, well, now how the fuck am I supposed to guess that? I was I supposed to anticipate that thing? I feel like, yeah, that's the slippery slope with these like unbounded, like, advertising campaigns and stuff. But when it's like a kid, like, if a kid did it with no supervision whatsoever, which is like, there has to be some sort of recourse, you know? For the family.

Like, there has to be some option that is not. Yeah, there's got to be like something. So I'm still waiting to find out if I still have a job. You know, I find out if this is going to come out directly out of my pocket and it. Okay, Dave, I'm going to, I'll say Dave, don't make the video until this is not a video to be making it right now. Avoid that. That's true. It's a shame because like clearly there's no one giving him advice on this because that's also, that would also be a financial line.

It's like, it's like generations of, in a very normal. way, generations of fuck man, I don't know what to do. And yet always at the top is corporate entity that hates you and to screw you over. It's also like the logic where you fire Dave for this. It, it breaks this like, it almost feels like you're firing him for like a parenting decision. Yeah, but like, because the kid ate all the candy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm like, okay, that feels like wrong.

And maybe I don't think allowed. Like, like, not to not to say that they can't just do illegal shit and get away with or whatever. But I don't think you can be fired for your kids stealing something from you at home. Yeah. Without your, well, I mean. Well, you could be fired for anything at some places. Netflix.

They'll fire you. They'll fire me. I don't work at Netflix. We gave them the permission. Yeah, here's an offer letter and a pink slip. My next season's been canceled. Your car belongs to us. It's not a company car.

I mean, it's easy to break into. You can just take it. Red Company card, this company car. This makes the, by the way, the reality of this, now with the Minecraft B-roll is even funny. I mean, it's so, like, there has to be so darkly funny to have that. I mean, maybe do, do a go from me?

Yeah. Maybe that was a little bit of time. Well, also making this video now is actually a good idea because maybe someone out there can give him financial advice. I'm not sure if you should take financial advice from strangers, but. I am a little bit like, also this is, You're bearing the lead 11 minutes into this video. All right, let's continue.

I hope he's all right. I got a few days to sit and figure out what happens next here. I'm not going to lie to you. I made an actual list of what to do to Mike at this point. He is going to do to Mike. All right. All right. He might have been phrasing.

Dave, we are trying to defend you. Do I spank him? Dave, Mike is already being punished by this mob. He's eating give it every turn I made a list Don't tell me I don't

Why are you telling you I'm not gonna lie to you Lie to us stay Yeah lie to us Or like rely on By omission I'm not gonna lie to you I made a list of what to do

to Mike To what they do to my kid He's gonna get What's coming to You don't know us You don't know us this This is parasocial Most of us are not

We're watching this Play Descenders The audio only listeners Must think we're so evil Because we should explain on screen right now Mike while playing Minecraft is making some

of these strangest so we lied he's not unpeaceful he just wasn't losing health or hunger because he wasn't moving it's night time so he's hiding in this little self-made cave that he's dug out with his hands stone included

and he is just like destroying the block that's blocking this skeleton and then destroying it to look at it again getting shot I'm going back in and digging and on top of this, his father is talking about the most like heart-breaking

scenario that's ever happening with his life. I'm so, I'm never been more curious. I'm more curious about the making of this that I am an avatar. Is Mike sitting next to him? I wonder. Is this just, I just don't know. Presumably where they record the videos

is also where they're recording this and baby. I think Mike has to be playing while his dad is talking. Or his dad. Dad's playing, like, and he's just like, you know when you, uh, have you ever, like, been playing a video game and you get like a serious phone call or something? Yeah. And then you're like, fingers are like moving in the game, but you're like, you're stimming basically with the, and like, maybe it's that.

I think I just have to assume if it is a nine year old in 2026, they literally can't not do something. Yeah. I think the kid would turn to dust if they weren't on the iPad or this. Unless Dave plays Minecraft with his son a lot, I think it has to be my because of the crouching all the time. The crouching, but then I'm also like... Is this pre-recorded... Well, no, Mike, I'm like, Mike, you've played hardcore. What are you doing?

Yeah. What's the big chain and bull there on the bright? He's been affected with slowness because the stray shot him with a slow arrow. Oh, my God, it's folded apart. I'm going to have a serious discussion with him, serious conversation, take away the iPads, the PlayStation's. It's plural. He's definitely going to be like mowing lawns until he's 18 or something like that.

Okay, no, that is too much. Oh, okay. He's going to be mowing lawns till he's 18. I'm like, that is. I mean, I guess if you have a lawn. That is like a worse punishment than like the law. Like to earn money. Yeah, but still it's like, I'm like, he's nine, man.

I don't know. I don't know. Okay. Also, you can probably make more money with AdSense. He should work at the company. life he's already lived, that's how long he's going to be moan-lawed. Yeah. Also, like, I don't want to turn it into it. Like, if he makes and make content, then now it's a family channel. You know what I mean? And it's like forcing a child to work in the content minds.

In the proverbial minds. The proverbial and literal minds. He yearns for the craft. Yeah. I mean, I'm sure there's some people like, how could you, how could you laugh at this? It is the darkly comedic It's the video. It's the weight of it and plus the video. Like, it is a, and it is a, and it, it's, It's just peculiar little moments. Like, I made a list of things I'm going to do to Mike. I'm worried about I even looked into maybe like, if he says sending him away, I'm going to like, call the gasque. Oh, in the boarding school.

I just want to make it clear. Our hearts are going out to this family. Like, this is not easy situation or fun. Hearts to the family, farce to the business. But it is the combination of a dad talking to his son's YouTube. audience and this video of fucking cooked in gameplay. The time also context of sharing all of this information to a YouTube audience that is presumably children makes so little sense.

Yeah, Mike being like, dad, I have a responsibility to my audience. Like, I need to tell them what happened. The thumbnail saying it's over and not being centered. It feels like an S&L. It is a really good joke. Like, it's a good parody. Yeah. It's over.

Yeah, unfortunately, you know, they do have the death penalty in our state. so I will be going to the electric picture. Did he say what's up chat or did you say what's up guys or did you say what's up gamers? He said sub chat. Cool. Badass. I love that.

That is, I'm not laughing. Sub chat. Anyway, my dad's going to be. Hey, so I recently took all of my arms and legs as a punishment on this one. They're coming to repossess all the PlayStation's. And the right now the mattress rests on five PlayStation. So it's a little awkward. There's so many creative choices.

like saying the iPads the PlayStation's. Because now I'm thinking you live in a lot of luxury. I think that's like the parent. That's a terminology for all of the. The PlayStation's. Yeah. I'm taking away all the iPads means his laptop, his iPad, his iPad, his right. Phone if he has.

Yeah. Okay. I see. Like I'm getting rid of all the Nintendos. My kids always playing Nintendos. Nintendo's does sound like a chicken restaurant. Hey, what were the Nintendos? Nandtendendos.

One hundred and 18,000. dollars per sandwich. What the adoption process actually involves, just at a curiosity. That's a joke. I'm kidding. A little much. I'm kidding, obviously. Nobody's getting adopted.

Well, I hope someone's getting adopted. I would never allow anyone to be adopted. That is, that is obviously you're a monster if that happened. Can we back up to the comedic timing of that? Interesting choice. Rule of eights. Yeah. Morrowons until he's 18, I think is like a joke.

Now and now can re contextualize it. What the adoption process. actually involves just out of curiosity. I'm kidding, obviously. Nobody's getting adopted. I won't allow it. For about a full minute,

I had some unhinged thoughts. Don't. Dude. What, Daddy, why is this man saying it on the iPad? Okay, like, don't tell me that. And then also, I hope your child can't hear this because, like, joking about adoption

to a kid is, like, I think a fucked up. And also, well, The kid's playing Minecraft. He's got here. He's locked in. And you don't need to be this honest. Yes, he's been in the truth right.

We didn't need, I'm sure you had some, like, bad thoughts in the minute of processing everything. The kid has better artifice than you do. He has a clean avail between reality and content. What's up? There needs to be consequences. You know,

he's listening to me right now. Even though he's the one... Austin answered. Doing a little Minecraft stuff over there. there at this. So he's playing the video game. Awesome. Poorly.

Just kind of really down and out right now. Aw. You know, something needs to happen, so he actually understands that actions have real consequences. And honestly, for me to... To turn the audio off. Actions have real consequences when he crouches up and down. It goes up and down while the skeletons killed by the sunlight.

It's like, um, it feels like a... It feels choreographed. It is like it's a beautiful concert. It's hard to even like roleplay out of joke version of it because they keep doing better than us. Yeah, it's a comedy of errors. Don't just why are you destroying that block? He's going to shoot you. I get it now.

He's just like stimming, I guess. Oh, brother. He's sad. He wants to be killed by this girl. When is that's like, we're going to figure this out? This is pretty tough on us and the kids just like crunching. Like bunny hopping. Oh, my God.

Oh. About, you know, is Mighty Mike plays actually over for good? Maybe, maybe not. It might, you know, it might be on pause for now. We need a little bit of time to reset. That's okay. You know, really. That's fine.

Yeah, it's just like so interesting. He's out of the whole. The tone is so perplexing to me throughout. I feel so bad for this dad. because what could you have done to think about this thing that like it's not in any parenting books you wouldn't have thought critically about it

Google Wallet was not a thing in your childhood it's just like it's a blank spot right? And it's like the consequences could have been so much less and like the amount of mistake it is versus the amount of consequence is like just random like it could have been 60 bucks

you know what I mean and no one could have found out about it but what I also am like, dude, I know it's, it's, uh, Dave wouldn't do it because it's his job. And I'm like, name and shame, dude. Someone from this company, tell me why you need to charge this man. Tell us about Palantia from the inside. Yeah, tell us, tell us the conversations you had with the bank where you felt like this was the, the process you had to go through.

I don't know. I'd love to them both, man. I do. I do genuinely. Yeah. It's true. Though, semi-related, it's, I'm now just being struck by the like, Whoa, analytics when I'm nine.

Whoa, friends with channels and numbers. Yeah. I do think, like, it is interesting how seriously this kid is taking this in a sense. Yeah. And I wonder why if it's just like cool, you know, to be taking this seriously. Or if he like actually wants, you know, if he thinks this is going to be my career. You know what I mean? Yeah, why wouldn't you?

Like, I remember. Oh, no. Sorry, Guy had the audacity to say sub chat after ruining his father's life. I'm like, okay, relax. Calm down. He's a child. Guy. Yeah, this guy, hopefully the dad lets us know because I'd contribute to a GoFundMe if that is like

what has to happen. I just feel like the company bears some responsibility for it. Because it's like they're kicking the can. Like the company is like parenting their employees with these, this unlimited fucking limit credit card. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, the culpability for a lot of financial stuff is on the company. But again, I guess if they are Palant Taylor, they'll set him on fire or something. They'll get away with it, I guess. The kids should be thankful for the daddy has. He is nine. He doesn't have empathy yet. Like, he's like, doesn't have the DLC.

It's because he should be thankful the daddy has. I would literally never see the light of day until I'm 18 and then kicked out of my parents' house. If I ever did anything, okay. Self-report. Weird vibes. Uh, yeah. Yeah, I mean, it's one thing is tricky that is like, I guess he's not going to have the, and he called it saviness. I guess he's not maybe online enough to know that these campaigns or fundraiser would be an option even. Okay, wait. Hey, dad.

I know your kid is young, but I think he really did know what he was doing to some extent. If you look at the videos you posted during the ad campaign, he directly hearts and even replies to some of the comments that acknowledge, how the ads are expensive and that he should not be able to afford this. I hope you get through this though. Please set up and go find me. Okay.

Well, because imagine as a kid being able to like buy all these ads and people are like, wow, these are expensive. You're like, yeah, isn't that cool? He knows what wrong means when you're a kid is different because that's what the punishments in life should be proportionally lower. It's like, well, something that's never going to happen is my dad doesn't keep his job. That's not gonna happen because he has a job and it's dad.

People forget what it's like to be a kid. You don't know this stuff yet. You're learning this stuff about the girl. Your brain doesn't work. It's crazy to see the like, to some extent, victim blaming the time to this like nine year old. The kid still, it's his dad. There's a reason why like you don't give a kid an unlimited credit card.

Yeah, it's not because kids are evil. But I'm just saying kids need extra explanation because they don't have the life experience to understand what the possible consequences are. The biggest mistake that Dave made was not having these parental controls and like limit set up. And like that's a big mistake. But many people learn that lesson from like a candy crush 599. Well, I was going to say adult sometimes learn this lesson later. The comment saying like, oh, ads are really expensive, you shouldn't be able to afford this. He's liking them because he's like, yeah, and I can afford it.

He's like, my dad has a cool job and it just keeps saying approved so we must have infinite money. It's really hard to process like naivety and then and be like non-hateful because the temptation is to be like, you've made a mistake through like ignorance or innocence or being lackadaisical. not being diligent enough, whatever. You screwed something up. I don't like the idea that people can screw things up because that means I could screw things up. So that means you're stupid.

You're not unfortunate or like you didn't miss here. I was, when my car got broken into, I shattered this like process that I some, for some reason had my brain of like, great, I now basically have a portable, super secure backpack. And I can just leave like backup stuff in here, so and so. And then when they broke in, they took what it was like I had like a little pouch of uh uh 300 bucks yeah and I had that's like

cash if I need for parking so and so but also it's uh for like a tattoo some tattoos I was going to get didn't end up going to that initial session was like well just keeping this little pouch pop it in here and it's in the center compartment and of course it got fucking stolen now that that's happened if if I heard that story from someone else I would instinctually be like what are you fucking stupid you have money in your car and then I would have to go like well wait and I just I just had like a small sum of $118,000. I'm saying, but a lot of people would be saying the same thing if he left like the credit card

in his wallet in a reachable place. Right, yeah. If he's just buying the views on YouTube, I feel like YouTube can just like wipe, because it's not like, like just the scale of this is so small in the grand scheme of YouTube, they should just wipe the views and then wipe the bill. Yeah.

You know what I mean? Because it's not like, it includes a bunch of like advertising partners. It's like literally just you are the advertising partner. And so there should be some sort of recourse for something like this because it is a very obviously situation where it's not like, oh, the Tide commercials already ran and a million people have already seen the Tide commercial. So you got what you paid for.

This is clearly a child, not a business. The channel is an advertising a product. It's probably not monetized. So it's like all these things mean that like this. it can be no harm, no foul to just like kind of cancel it. So hopefully there's some way to bubble this up through that means.

Hopefully, the thing is like, my biggest hope is that he, Daddy Derek or whatever his name is, that he, audacity Dave, that this is enough noise and online activity that it can like break through the membrane and get to him.

And he can find out that he, he actually deserves better and that there might be some recourse and some legal work arounds. Because I think, you know, if you're just like a normal person and your job is saying, we can fire you, you just go like, oh, I guess they can. You always defer to authority. And he probably just thinks like, yeah, I will either have to pay it all back. Actually, I'm just remembering this happened at a previous job that I had where they had, the company had been misallocating my taxes.

They hadn't been withholding correctly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then a year into the gig, it came along and they were like, hey, you owe us like $4,000. I was like, well, but I checked payroll and we were withholding. And like, right, we were just missing a payment that was additional. And then like, I mean, it was like, that fucking sucks. And they're like, yeah, we can just take it in small portions over time. Got all of that ranting to some friends about how frustrated I was.

But like, I'm just not, I'm just going to, you know, cut back a little bit. I can pay that back with time. And then one of my friends was on, like they were a lawyer. And they went, no, you do not have to pay that back. Are you fucking crazy? And then I'm like, oh, really? And then I didn't. Like, the, that I think I said this before, but it was like, I got in trouble with my

university once because they accidentally sent me 10 grand. You might. Like, but I, it could have been like, because, but I would get payments like, Bursar payments for financial aid stuff. And so it wasn't like for that, but it like is entirely feasible that if it had happened at a time that was like supposed, it was like supposed to go back into the system or something or be used as a stipend to pay for like some of the like semester or something like that. Maybe you're getting it in bulk for the next two years. No, no. Yeah.

Because sometimes it works in weird ways or like you get paid a stipend. And then if I was like living on campus and so then you pay that through the like account thing. But it just like got deposited directly into my account. And I was like, what? And then they were like, give it back or else. And I was like, I didn't steal it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like when they sent, uh, when, which is the coast sent the, uh, like a new set to the guy.

And then they said like a team of assassins to shoot him in the head. It's like a honey pot. Like, they're like, oh yeah, you want to grab that new set? Nice try. Like, I didn't. I didn't know that it's a brown box. It looks like all the other packages I get. Hey, come on inside.

Thief, you broke in. You broke in. We're going to stay tuned to this story. My heart goes out to the Mighty Family. And if there's a GoFundMe, we'll link it. But hopefully this gets, like, the reason that I hope that they don't have to go through the GoFundMe route is because ultimately, if the situation is later resolved in a corporate fashion, then. the, it's like double jeopardy for, like the company just like makes money. Yes.

On this thing. And I'm hoping that it can be like resolved through the proper channels. But I'm hoping that a kid's allowed to make them like fuck something up that they weren't. They knew they were being nor even. They didn't like steal a car and drive it, which kids have done. And like hit someone with it. Right. That's the thing.

It's like kids have done that. And it's like it didn't like plunge their family into financial. And I know I would. I did. Actually, I did. I got in my friend of mine's car or a friend of mine's mom's car

to drive it a little bit, felt bad and I knew I wasn't supposed to be doing it, got caught, got in trouble. I have no one lost anybody. Buy your shirt out of the window. When my brother was a preteen, well no, he was 13, but he broke into his school

at night with a bunch of his friends, skateboarded in the school, did a bunch of damn. Hell yeah. Got brought home by the cops. By the- and they just kind of let them all off with like a warning.

Yeah. Dude, I gotta tell you, I think he absorbed all of the cool jeans. No. Because all these stories, he is the king of swag and I know you. My brother- His friends were named like Tom and John. Michael. Yeah.

Yeah. I was just talking about that with blanket. Yeah. Like, I, I'm, yeah, he had a friend name, um, Bill, I think. Oh my God. Like the most most guy in the world. Well, we're gonna, uh, peeps saw a very troubling, speaking of YouTube ads, peeps found a very troubling YouTube ad because they don't have premium apparently.

Yeah. And, uh, okay. And that's good because you're doing field research for us. Yeah, to watch a horrible ad on, on our Patreon at patreon. dot com slash sabboys $5 of your discretionary entertainment spending don't use your company card or your father's company card or you know what do yeah go for it if you want to spend you don't even have to spend $118,000 for the low low price of $5 per month you get access to over 118 episodes of our podcast is even it's closer to like 180 or something yeah but there is the $116000

$116,000 activation fee don't worry that I've been making a list of the stuff I'm going to do to do it We and every episode that way is that way so A particular phrase We love you We're sorry Goochie girl How you doing How you moving girl?

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