Sad Boyz - Abandoning Your Family For Breakdancing (w/ Emma Langevin)

Episode Date: February 23, 2024

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Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to Sad Boys, a podcast about feelings and other things. Also, I'm Jarvis. Jordan. And today we're joined by Emma. And I know I'm going to say this wrong and I know how I learned once how to say it. Oh, but I don't. Okay. Okay.
Starting point is 00:00:14 You didn't do your research before you came? No, I was hoping that my memory would help me. Is it Langevin or Langevin? Neither. Neither. Fuck. Kill me. Ooh, who wants to shoot him first all right how do you say it langevin fuck technically it's like longinus i knew like the lance of longinus shout out to my ava heads out there i had a mnemonic in my head and i just forgot it i don't think i technically say it right either because the French Canadians are always like,
Starting point is 00:00:45 that's not how you say it, but then they don't tell me how it's supposed to be pronounced. That's how my family says it, so I don't know. They're top of the list of people who ignore it globally. Who cares about French Canadians? Pick a lane. Jordan famously hates the French. Love the Canadians.
Starting point is 00:01:01 That's fair. That's good. I think it's arrogant of the French to try and take over Canada like that. Unless they were there first. I love the Canadians. That's fair. Yeah, that's good. Yeah. But I think that it's arrogant of the French to try and take over Canada like that. Unless they were there first. I don't know. Emma, I would describe
Starting point is 00:01:10 you as a content demon. That's fair. Yeah. I was going to say, how would you describe yourself? I'm like the opposite of a comfort creator.
Starting point is 00:01:18 Discomfort creator? Yeah, a discomfort creator. You're like a bed of needles then. And even creator's a loose term because you have to post to be a creator. You'd think so.
Starting point is 00:01:28 Jordan's been getting away with a lot. I'm the devil of podcasts. You know what I mean? I'm the devilish little don't do nothing. That's me too. But you're currently a New Yorker. Yes. And you are from that part of the States.
Starting point is 00:01:45 Yeah, I'm technically from Jersey. Okay. But then you, why do you? I don't claim it. I'm from there, but I don't claim Jersey. That's like me in Florida. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:56 That was the face I made when I was born. That's like me in Jersey. Because I'm not from there. I don't claim it, really. That's a horrible place. But the ideology that hey yeah that i that i connect with i don't think you know jordan i feel like you know would you describe yourself as like not claiming glossisher or not claiming stroud stroud
Starting point is 00:02:18 showed on representatives i'll stick i'll stay with it you know what i mean it's like being an alma mater of a school of 10 like yeah it It's one of those things where, like, whenever you describe it, it doesn't sound like you don't paint a beautiful picture. You don't weave a rich tapestry. But then if you were to describe it, oh, he's from the south of England. Yeah. It's very picturesque and stuff. No, it's nice. I mean, it's nice that people are nice.
Starting point is 00:02:43 It's just, I imagine it's just like, if you move so far away from your hometown and i like all this stuff it wasn't i prefer like open environments and i like the sun and consistent sun and i hate hills like this represents everything i'm not i want to be a city dwelling schmuck because you get older maybe that matters less like how long were you not in on the east coast um i lived here for two years but then i also lived in like nevada for like a year and what was the timeline of nevada um like 2019 i lived in vegas for like three months and then i lived in reno for six months nice i'm so curious what brought you there um e-dating oh hell yeah it wasn't a vibe if someone loves you they won't make you move to reno nevada there we go like let us know
Starting point is 00:03:32 it's not in stone actually it's one of those relationship tests yeah doing the reno test on my boyfriend no for real the reno test once you move to reno yeah i didn't know i could find a place worse than new jersey and then i went I moved to Reno, Nevada for six months. And then Reno said, hold my, what do they have there? I don't know. I don't know. Casinos. Hold my, hold my coin.
Starting point is 00:03:51 Jeff Dunham is always there. I guess he's got like a residency. He's lost. There's billboards of him everywhere. When I picture Jeff Dunham, he has the puppet. Like it doesn't matter where he is. It's like a buffet line. It just fused to his hand.
Starting point is 00:04:03 He sleeps with it, yeah. And not like a weird way. It's just like got a small pillow yeah he's like a sleeping mask on yeah yeah uh so you awake so you came you you moved to la for a couple years and you were like fuck this i was here for two years and then i don't know i wanted to go be a new yorker right and then and then now this is your your I was going to say your homecoming, but more like you were here for two years. It was more like a stop coming. I don't even know.
Starting point is 00:04:33 There's not a word for that. Home leaving. Home leaving. Anyway, what's it like being back in LA? I like it. I miss it a lot. I may have got too silly and moved a little impulsively, but. Hey, that's life.
Starting point is 00:04:42 You know? Yeah. I don't know. I wish I could like split myself in half and live in both places. Some people do. I mean, you could make a hair joke there. Yeah, my old hair. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:53 Yeah, that used to be my thing. Yeah. And then also on the... Was it the first Nephilim drop? Yeah. The two-tone hair? Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:00 That's why you were doing it. Yeah, because I was like really popular when I had that hair. So I just kind of made a character based off of it. So I could like use it as like a sauna for things. I think that's very smart. Yeah, thank you. Wise. What's it like being in the big apple now?
Starting point is 00:05:16 What's the day to day? Well, I don't know anybody that lives out there because everybody left. My family is like an hour away. Okay. But yeah, nobody lives out there because everybody left my family is like an hour away okay but um yeah nobody um lives out there so i just kind of sit and i work and i hang out with my dog and that's kind of it you know that is exactly what moving to la was like for me for the first two years yeah because i moved right yeah that was me for my first six months here. I moved right before lockdown.
Starting point is 00:05:49 Like right at the end of, I moved, okay. End of 2019. Yeah. From Wuhan. Okay, hold on. A little suspicious. Hold your horses. I got a couple months in of like,
Starting point is 00:06:01 okay, I know people in this town. I'm gonna, oh should i have to stay in forever oh i have to stay in and order dave's hot chicken and play runescape for two years straight okay i have to do it i'll do that yeah if you insist now i have to do it still actually is like mine i've just started doing that i don't leave the house as much as i should but before we get into that let's talk about today's sponsor aura or as an app that helps you control what private information is shared about you online. First name, last name, address, middle names, phone number.
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Starting point is 00:07:08 Let Aura do the work of keeping you safe online. Head on over to Aura.com slash sadboys in order to get a 14-day free trial of Aura. And learn what kind of information is just freely available online. Thanks again to Aura for sponsoring this video. Now back to the books. To the podcast. That's what we do. What's work for you right now?
Starting point is 00:07:28 How's that work? I basically, you know, I usually wake up and then I call, I wake up at a crisp 1 p.m. Hell yeah. Because my insomnia is terrible. Thank you for making it here. Yeah, I did my best, you know? And then, yeah, I call my business partner
Starting point is 00:07:43 and we kind of just discuss nephilim stuff and work on the brand basically like an hour or two i was watching um just a little update video you did on instagram and uh yeah the like that is like a its own clothing company you wouldn't describe it i think there's like a difference between like a merch it's not merch exactly a lot of people call it merch but it's not merch they mean well yeah because it's also like i feel know a lot of like influencers have like a clothing brand is like a side hustle just a way to generate money but this is like a thing i'm very passionate about and actually like i give a shit yeah and i design everything myself the clothing brand is the first yeah like it's my first thing yeah everything which is awesome like and i think that that is
Starting point is 00:08:25 like there are so many different ways to be a creator or to be creative and sometimes you have to try out different hats you know and see like what sticks yeah so do you feel like you found like that thing right now with nephilim yeah i it was really weird when i was a child like the first job i wanted to have was be a fashion designer. And then I didn't consider it actually like a thing, like for the rest of my life, kind of. And then I like kind of realized like I had the opportunity to do it because my friend V, who's my business partner, has had his own brand and he's just like run multiple
Starting point is 00:08:57 businesses, businesses in his life. And he's just, he can just do everything. He's just one of those people. He can, you know, he does photography, graphic design. He's owned all types of shops. Like he just how to do everything yeah yeah so then one day i just like called him and i was like hey should we just like make a clothing brand because i need a job yeah you know and we have i have ideas and i have a vision i already thought like nephilim was a cool word like i remember hearing it a couple years ago and i was like that'd be a sick brand
Starting point is 00:09:22 and i just always had it like in the back of my mind yeah yeah which it's just it was always a thing you could do is start the brand and then what something clicks you just went oh i'll do it the thing yeah oh it happened and plus like i think in life like you want to find ways to use you know the the stuff that you've accumulated the experience the let's you've accumulated, the experience, the let's, you know, if you've have an audience or something like you want to find a way, you know, there's gotta be a way to make a job work. Right. If I've got all of these things, cause you, you know, have an audience that you've built from, you know, creating content. And if you decide, Hey, maybe I don't want to do that, but I can still pivot this attention. Yeah. yeah and and the people who are following me probably want to see me really excited about
Starting point is 00:10:09 something and this is something i'm excited about yeah they just want to see me actually do something that's great though yeah is that the number one priority for the foreseeable is there anything any other plate you'd like to kind of spend yeah basically working on nephilim and like expanding it um is kind of the thing i definitely want to get into are you guys like familiar with like you know how there's like vinyl like art toys kind of a thing yeah it's like um basically it's like toys but they're art oh you know but they're like for adults do you is there like a famous one that i may know of uh maybe not by you know how people have those like lego look and mickey mouse things that rich people will have yeah that's one of them they're called bear bricks okay yeah i'm know of uh maybe not by you know how people have those like lego looking mickey mouse things that
Starting point is 00:10:45 rich people will have yeah that's one of them they're called bear bricks okay yeah i'm familiar with bear bricks yeah that's like probably one of the most popular ones you'd see like around la and stuff like that that makes sense there's this little guy he's also kind of like mickey looking adjacent it's like a little skull dude and they're called cause figures okay um if you saw them you definitely probably like you'd recognize what it was right that makes sense that makes sense and then yeah okay but i want to really get into like the vinyl toy industry yeah we definitely know a lot of uh there's some san francisco people specifically we both know from work and the past that have them oh yeah that's my only reference yeah yeah yeah i think sam has some definitely it could be any sam hey you don't know just check who we worked with from Zolt
Starting point is 00:11:25 yeah that's kind of sick is there like content content you ever want to dabble in again I don't know I've been working on podcast ideas for like two years now
Starting point is 00:11:36 but I keep changing things so it keeps kind of tread lightly yeah alright it's fine I won't be in your lane it would be fun to just
Starting point is 00:11:43 like arbitrarily become rivals for content just to start a podcast we isn't even out yet we just beef with anyone who has a podcast hey awesome who are these people with the mic who do you think they are this guy what is he talking about jujitsu and ivermectin that's our show rogan that's my stuff yeah so there's that i don't know i go back and forth with the content thing because I'm just like scared and having a lot of attention on me personally freaks me out. But then also I want to be successful and like recognized as my own person. Right.
Starting point is 00:12:13 But then also I'm scared. I think that's relatable to a lot of people. And I think that's valid also because sometimes there is this narrative and I see it a lot with like very big mainstream celebrities where it's like, you asked for this, you, you've got to take the good with the bad and you're not allowed to complain or feel emotions because people want to be in the position that you're in. And while I can empathize with like that, like where someone is coming from there, there is just the natural, like everyone goes through the same cycle of human emotions. We
Starting point is 00:12:44 have the same like, you know, set of neurotransmitters and sort of ups and downs and cycles and stuff. And you don't want to set a social standard where like you, everyone has the capacity to be permanently happy. And if you don't reach that stage, you're failing in life. Like if you feel bad about something, it must be like, oh, look, I'm not successful enough. And that's when you start feeling good and never bad about but if you start especially like a new venture you want to do something completely new you can't it's not like transferable happiness and satisfaction like wow i'm in like really i'm in great shape that means i'm not sad about my bad relationship right so that is like unrelated no exactly yeah yeah i also like randomly went viral one day so it was kind of like
Starting point is 00:13:27 okay this is my life now yeah you like quite literally didn't ask to like like i did what i didn't like i didn't know it was going to be like that you know right because if you're the guy who um uh it becomes known as the airplane diarrhea man in barcelona this is somebody we talked about they had to ground a plane in barcelona because a dude had explosive that's awesome and like termed as what was it like a biological event like bioweapon event it's like if i'm gonna be famous sometimes you don't get to choose you know yeah you could you could say you know like we live in a time where people can become popular simply for having an airplane freak out or like having a viral photo of them or there's all those like videos interviewing people who became memes at an
Starting point is 00:14:11 early age do you guys remember balloon boy oh my god yes that was crazy yeah because it's nothing the end of the story is just there was a balloon around and then a guy was lying. I watched a two-hour documentary about Balloon Boy and the dad. Yeah. Because he was like this like inventor dude. And there was all these conspiracies about, you know, because the kid said we wanted to do it for a show. And I don't know. I feel like there's still communities that haven't made up their mind about Balloon Boy all these years later. And I think maybe I'm a part of that community.
Starting point is 00:14:43 Oh, interesting. Maybe he was a balloon or whatever. Welcome back welcome back by the way how long are you in town how have you been in town uh i got here thursday and then i'm here till thursday hey classic thursday thursday i know i would stay longer but i have a dog back home so i can't leave him oh where you go what's your dog he's a french bulldog his name is bruno oh yeah he's the best do you put him in a backpack put him on a plane i think they have like breathing issues and stuff he's also like slightly too big so it's like kind of risky and i'm like way too paranoid like i'm just also like the stress of having a dog in the airport just seems like a lot when you're like traveling alone especially but i wish i love him
Starting point is 00:15:20 so much if i could bring him then i would just stay out here. Probably because I- You are not loving travel kind of person. Yeah, I hate it. Yeah. I like projectile vomited on the plane on the way here. Hey, you, they could have- I don't know why. I don't know why. I know I could have been that guy.
Starting point is 00:15:35 That's what I was thinking. I was like, no, I like made it. It was like during takeoff. I don't know what happened. And then- You got there immediately. Yeah. You were like, take off, I will.
Starting point is 00:15:44 I was like, okay, I'm going. I ran to the bathroom and they were like, the seatbelt light is still on. And I think he was standing right outside. It's like a thin plastic partition. I think he heard me and he was like, okay, nevermind. He was like, we should let her in there. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:16:00 It was kind of sick. I've never projectiled like that before. I don't know what happened. I don't know. It was early in the morning. Maybe it's because I had to wake up at 6 a. I've never projectiled like that before. I don't know what happened. I don't know. It was early in the morning. Maybe it's because I had to wake up at 6 a.m. My stomach was like... Sometimes your body just does something weird and never does it again.
Starting point is 00:16:12 Yeah. But you have to spend the rest of your life. I was like, okay. Then I passed out for two hours and played Suika game for the rest of it. That's a cure. Yeah. No matter what your sickness is. What's funny is that some people will have that experience and literally make a career out of their suika game based uh health care plan
Starting point is 00:16:30 oh i should maybe that should be my calling that's your content pivot yeah the nephilim wellness program is game out yeah um are you chronically ill, buy a Switch. That's all you need. I feel like you have made mental health conversations and talk a big part of like your content and stuff. And it's always, to me, seemed very like approachable and relatable. Yeah, when you're crazy, you kind of got to be transparent about it. So like if I do some weird shit people are like oh okay she's nuts you know
Starting point is 00:17:05 not a lot of people identify with that though yeah I think that it takes a certain amount of self-awareness yeah I know like I know there's a lot wrong
Starting point is 00:17:12 with me and I knew before the internet so it's like you know I can't really I mean I think I do a pretty good job
Starting point is 00:17:17 I don't know I had it somewhat well online so it's like you're being insane right now yeah I probably
Starting point is 00:17:22 you're so normal yeah it's like chewing on my hand this is most normal podcast uh i mean that's it that's interesting way of framing it being like um like preemptive yeah it's like it's like a warning you know what i mean so it's like hey if i do some weird shit like you you know you're not gonna be like i never expected this from her yeah but also i don't know I feel like you kind of tell just by like looking at me, but some people,
Starting point is 00:17:47 you know, I guess don't. It's nice to set that up. Like, no, you're not profiling. Don't worry. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:53 No, like I'm like actually nuts. Like this has been a thing, you know, it was a thing before the internet, you know, there's all triangles on the back of a truck.
Starting point is 00:18:00 Like you need to give me extra space if you're going to break. Yeah, exactly. I was imagining like the caution, caution signs.'m like hey you created this so it's your fault right right oh okay that wasn't what i was thinking you made me be a truck no it's like i was already crazy so it's like you i mean you blew me up so if anything happens that's on you you know what i mean true yeah like i warned y'all i've been telling y'all since the beginning so if i
Starting point is 00:18:24 go off the rails you know what i mean like shave my head again like they'll know you're sneezing and coughing and you're like don't get near me yeah i'm sick it's like there's uh like if you take the tag off of your your bed there's no more warranty it's like you wanted this you you asked for this that's it and there it is that's what being insane is it's having a tag yeah you pull it off. The warranty goes away. You're like, ah, now I have six minutes. Rats. Yep.
Starting point is 00:18:47 It sucks. Do you mind? What's like, we can talk about it more specifically. What's wrong with me? Yeah. What the fuck is up? Like, do we, any crossover maybe? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:55 I don't know how real you want to get. I mean, we get. Which one do we start with? Actually, it's really, for us, it's more about your comfort level. I don't care. Oh, okay. So. I'm very like transparently nuts. But yeah, I'm like, it's more about your comfort level. I don't care. Okay, so. I'm very, like, transparently nuts.
Starting point is 00:19:06 But yeah, I'm like, I was late diagnosed with, like, autism, like, a year ago. Oh, really? Recently? Okay. Yeah. Like, when I was, like, 23. I was like, so. That was fun.
Starting point is 00:19:16 Yeah. I was like, oh, okay. That explains every social interaction I've had in my entire life ever and why people would just randomly hate me for being weird my whole life. Did you was there like a catalyst for looking into it i well i always knew i was a little freak like i knew there was something wrong with me and i because i've been in like kind of mental health treatment like on and off since i was like 15 like i started like therapy around then and stuff and like i knew i was crazy like i was bullied really bad in like middle school and high school like i dropped out of high school cause I was bullied. Um, and again, I, in hindsight, I'm like, I kind of get
Starting point is 00:19:48 it, but also like, I was kind of a freak. I should have put up a warning. Yeah. I mean, I don't know. I didn't have the, you know, so I knew something wrong with me and I kind of got diagnosed with like everything under the sun. And then I was like, okay, there's no way I could have like depression, panic disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety, like, and all these other symptoms of other things. I'm like, I feel like there's got to be a way to like condense this into like one. Right. Because a lot of those things too, like anxiety and depression as two examples intertwine so much or like depression and ADHD, like intertwine so much that like, how could someone really say that like i i know it's a b c d e yeah and they just like i don't know my therapist like didn't want me to get diagnosed because she had weird
Starting point is 00:20:31 beliefs um and then i'd ask her like i started suspecting it when i was like 18 when i was like working at gamestop my manager like i was like talking about like my sensory issues with him and he was like hey do you have like autism i'm like i don't know then we're taking like online autism tests like at work because that's what you do when you work at gamestop you know and i was like maybe but then can i trade this game in for 45 cents i'm wrapping up a quizlet yeah i just you know whatever lisa i'm trying to figure out which uh which mentally ill media character I am on Buzzfeed. Sorry, I'm just looking at facts about trains right now. Can you wait?
Starting point is 00:21:11 Can you shut up? I'm reading about Boeing. Actually. Yeah, so then I asked my therapist every half a year and she was like, I can tell you're not. And I don't know. She has like a power. Your job is not vibe based.
Starting point is 00:21:24 That's not what your job is not vibe based that's not what your job is yeah that was it and then um just a doctor looking at you being like i don't reckon okay but that should happen no you're a woman yeah that was it no that literally that that what pisses me off like it's like if you're if you're a woman or any minority you know it's like you you get such like a... They just sniff you. Like I have to, I feel like I have to have doctors
Starting point is 00:21:49 that have some overlap and like background with me to get like a real... Oh, I've had to like throw myself on the floor crying to get like any doctor to listen to me ever. Like mental health or just like regular health. And it costs a million dollars. Yeah, I've had to like,
Starting point is 00:22:02 they're like a temper tantrum and they're like, okay. You want to shut up. And then you're making a scene. A little kid at like a grocery store laying down and going limp, like, okay, we'll go home. Yeah, no, like actually. No, I mean, I'm sure there's, I mean, I guess your therapist was downing you.
Starting point is 00:22:17 It's a completely different person that the assessment for autism. Yeah, I was on, I kind of had to narrow it down myself because I was on like meds when I was 17 and then I was just like fat and I shaved my head and like, it was a really weird phase in my life. I just kind of went crazy. Like the meds didn't work. And then I tried them again after I like blew up online because you know, the internet's mean. And I was like, maybe I need meds. And then I got back on them and then I was basically just like suicidal for like two years.
Starting point is 00:22:48 The two pretty bad two pretty bad years yeah i'm honestly i'm amazed i made it through it to be honest like it was really dark well i mean that's amazing like it's also like you you had all the self-awareness you like were trying to get i was always trying to figure out like what to do and i think it's insane that they can just like give you drugs without like trying to diagnose you or test you with anything first yeah like i find that absolutely bonkers because the thing was like because i had autism putting me in all these like concoction of meds it doesn't do anything for like autism you know it's like it's whatever so i kind of narrowed it down like i thought i had either bpd or again like autism i also and um yeah i found i was gonna give up i was like seeing a psych i had seen like multiple psychiatrists I would try to figure it out everybody was like I don't know
Starting point is 00:23:26 and then like literally by the grace of God like a fucking TikTok shows up of this girl in California talking about how she got diagnosed and the doctor who did it like specializes in like women and like non-binary people specifically so I was like okay as like a Hail Mary let me spend $3,000
Starting point is 00:23:42 because that's how much an autism assessment costs out of pocket and you know and I and I was like if I'm not this is going to be really fucked up because I spent three thousand dollars you know it's like getting the surgery before you even know that you're right no exactly oh whoops and um you know I saw that it was like two weeks of like testing and like interviewing my family I had to answer like literally over a thousand questions and like give her my whole life story, which is dark. And yeah, and then she was like, yeah, you're definitely autistic.
Starting point is 00:24:11 And it was that. And then I also got diagnosed with ADHD and I have CPTSD. Did they, is that had an impact? I mean, I don't know if they, not specifically medication, but like has that lightened the load? It was such a relief because it just, it contextualized everything that's kind of happened to me ever. You know, I was able to look back at things and like situations I was in and
Starting point is 00:24:31 be like, oh, okay. So like, that's why that happened that way. And stuff like that. Forgive yourself for those like. Yeah. Cause that's all I ever wanted. Like my entire life. Like I knew I was off.
Starting point is 00:24:38 I knew I was weird. Everybody made sure to make sure I knew that, you know, as well. Hey, just checking in. You're a freak and you should die. Oh, I was thinking that as well. Hey, just checking in. Yeah, just checking in. You're a freak and you should die. Oh, I was thinking that as well. Yeah, I was like, oh my God, that's crazy. You know. Like a reference.
Starting point is 00:24:51 Yeah. So it all just kind of worked out. And then, yeah, but no, it was such a relief. For me, it was like something I just needed to know. Like I couldn't rest until I figured out like what was going on. It's, so yeah, that is something that I think a lot of people relate to. Like I
Starting point is 00:25:06 wasn't diagnosed with ADHD until or like anxiety depression until six or so years ago now. But I'm like I was like a fully functional adult with all these experiences where I felt like I had I was like a pinball that was like or like one of those Plinko games where I like happened to be like bouncing around into the right situations to like even be a functional adult. And I was like, well, I'm, I'm here and I have the means now to figure out what's going on with me. And then the actual progress can start because you have a name and you have like literature and experiences that you can from other people that you can pull on to like learn from. I remember my, like one of the small, I talk about this a lot on the podcast, but one of the like niche sort of, I want to say comorbidities, but like one of the like niche sort of side things that is often associated with ADHD is something called rejection sensitive
Starting point is 00:26:05 dysphoria. And that, like when I was a kid, it was like, I was always experiencing that where I would just shut down in like certain situations where I'd feel this like intense rejection. And my brain would just go like blank where I couldn't, I would just feel horrible. And like, I wanted to like sort of evaporate from the world and I would just go non-verbal and like sit and then all my friends would be like yeah Jarvis just does that and it wasn't even anything serious ever yeah it's like such an overreaction but you can't like and I just thought I was weird I just thought I was sensitive you know what I mean and you have to read them as like emmerisms or javasisms or like
Starting point is 00:26:45 that's just a trait I have and then you get some kind of assessment diagnosis or otherwise and then it's like oh well
Starting point is 00:26:51 no I just have all the symptoms of that condition not the condition or like yeah I was always told I was doing it for attention because that's like a big thing with like women too
Starting point is 00:26:59 you know I just wanted attention because like I'd like especially if I was like parties and stuff as a kid like little birthday parties like all the times
Starting point is 00:27:04 like I'd get overwhelmed and I'd go like have to stand in the corner and not talk to anybody and be really quiet you know for a bit and like i didn't know what that was everybody's like oh she just wants attention there's such a deranged assessment like well she wants attention so she is isolated herself doesn't want to talk to anybody it needs to like just be you know dude this person's not coming to the event because they want attention from us at the event. The other thing is like attention seeking is also like a mental illness symptom, you know? So it's like if someone is like faking symptoms or faking their mental illness, they're also probably still, they're still mentally ill.
Starting point is 00:27:36 Like that's not a normal thing to do either. That's where it comes in. It's just like, that's just an aneurysm. That's a thing that arbitrarily happens for no reason. Oh, they can't have peanuts. It makes their throat swell up. Stop showing off. Yeah, got a grip.
Starting point is 00:27:50 It's easier than like actually looking into it. The like for me, and it sounds like we maybe have this in common, is like the silver lining is the self-awareness to be like, I don't, this doesn't feel right to me. I don't want this. It just is happening and I'm trying to navigate it. So at least like when I am in my, in better sorts, I can seek treatment or I can seek, you know, answers and try to then give people the heads up or the warnings. And it's like,
Starting point is 00:28:19 when I'm spiraling with like significant others or friends or whatever, I'm just like, Hey, uh, this uh this uh it's gonna pass i'm so sorry everything's just really bad right now yeah you get that do you have that same experience of like it's like the adhd diagnosis but then the one that felt really different was like six months later after starting medication my what i later learned was bipolar too was my hypomania was so much more frequent so much more intense because it wasn't being leveled out by you know methods medication whatever worked best and with that one especially that I just had this clarifying moment of getting to like
Starting point is 00:28:57 go through the archive of all my most frustrating or embarrassing or resentful moments and you know see them critically from outside, but also forgive myself for some of them. Yeah. Good to say like, well, why did I feel like I wasted all this time or I didn't work hard enough at this or I could have made the most of my like degree. I could have been more active at school or, you know,
Starting point is 00:29:18 stuff like that. And now, or I actually, the big one was, I just thought of myself as a angry person and thought of myself as a inconsistent person it was never like sometimes lazy sometimes odd sometimes too focused sometimes whatever and it was always like the feedback i would always get at work it was never like you are bad at this it is you are bad at this 40 of the time you are inconsistent i'm like oh yeah but i don't like those moments i'm not i'm like just going home and going to bed i'm not going home and having a nice night and like oh i should have done my work oopsie and now in retrospect i can go like oh that i can mourn that younger
Starting point is 00:29:54 version of myself that just didn't know yeah but i assume that every difficult interaction day-to-day event routine work anything for you now gets to be reframed as like the results of autism or however you want to yeah no definitely results of the cocktail the world wants us to like especially when you're when you're growing up every we're treated as if everything is a function of our decisions and like uh so you make good decisions you're a good person you make bad decisions you're a bad person if you weird people out at a party you're a weirdo and a freak if you look different than like you've done something wrong even if it's just how you were fucking born yeah and so and it's such a double-edged sword especially or not even
Starting point is 00:30:41 double-edged sword it's just a it just sucks-edged sword. It's just a, it just sucks. It's like, like bullying. It can be so, it can be such an extreme, have such an extremely negative effect because it's happening at this vulnerable time where you're trying to like discover yourself and figure out your way through the world. And things are going on that you don't have the vocabulary to explain and people are telling you what you are and then you're like i guess i'm that then yeah you know how does the term feel i know some people are hesitant to describe themselves as autistic because there's like negative associations with some people yeah you're very candid about it yeah i don't really care i i don't know i think it's also because i've just been also called everything under the sun so like another like labels don't really care. I don't know. I think it's also because I've just been also called everything under the sun.
Starting point is 00:31:28 So like another like labels don't really bother me in that way. You know, it's also it's not a bad word. It isn't a bad thing. You know, it's like, OK, this is just what it is. You know what I mean? Like, this is it. I can't control it. The strategy, I don't really know. I mean, everybody's experience with autism is so different.
Starting point is 00:31:40 So I don't know. But like after your diagnosis, did you get recommendations of how to mitigate like some of the more difficult or is it more like avoiding situations that would be difficult yeah I mean I kind of like how to grasp on like how to like handle myself at that point like you had your own coping strategy yeah like I definitely got off meds I don't think I mean if meds work for people I think it's fantastic I've only ever had miserable experiences with them like they've just never done anything for me so i know i probably won't go down that route again but i kind of know like i know because i know things that will make me overwhelmed to what well and i'm always pretty good at like i think setting my boundaries and stuff at this point in my life i kind of got to
Starting point is 00:32:16 that point that's just do like things i had to experience and stuff yeah like i don't know i kind of like you know became like a bitch is like a defense mechanism thing but it works you know so now i'm just a bitch because it's fun yeah it's nice to do also that it's fun and then it's also like you know it keeps people like from fucking with you if you're like scary you know it helps to be intimidating do you feel like uh I mean, to be fair, moving around a lot is, I would assume maybe incorrectly as maybe difficult. I know commonly autism presents in some cases as like change is difficult or immediate. Yeah. It's hard to adapt.
Starting point is 00:32:56 It was never something that I really feared because like no matter what, like also another thing in my whole life, I was like, I need to get out of New Jersey. You know, because that's like where all the fucked up things happen to me. You know what I mean? Sopranos are there. Yeah, that and Nevada. Like I was like, I need to get out of New Jersey, you know, because that's like where all the fucked up things happen to me. You know what I mean? Yeah. That and Nevada. Like I was like, I need to get out of here. So it's kind of always like it's like survivors instinct. Two places, by the way, where everyone is going to agree with you.
Starting point is 00:33:13 You're like, I had to get out of New Jersey. You're like, I know. Yeah. It's like nobody's going to be like, why? Yeah. Nobody knows why. Just someone who's like, can't find any water in Nevada. And it's like, oh yeah, of course.
Starting point is 00:33:24 Yeah. Good idea. Yeah. You know, it's 107 degrees. Also people from New Jersey who are mad about this. just someone who's like can't find any water in Nevada and is like oh yeah of course yeah good idea yeah you know it's 107 degrees also people from New Jersey who are mad about this you're used to it by now yeah go back to the deli
Starting point is 00:33:31 you're the person that would have told me to die in middle school so like you know hey I'm not liking these sad boys talking bad about my New Jersey the water's different
Starting point is 00:33:39 or whatever oh man the Sopranos live in here like Las Vegas stresses me out I know that's not what Nevada is
Starting point is 00:33:47 it was scary I feel like I was gonna get abducted by aliens the whole time right it's like weird it has all the bad stuff is it area 51 there yeah
Starting point is 00:33:54 like I thought it was freaky and Reno's the same way where if you like stand anywhere you could like 360 like see mountains around you
Starting point is 00:34:01 it just felt like I was in a hole yeah it's just a creepy ass place. Yeah, because Vegas, I mean, my experience of Nevada is Vegas. I know. So much of it is just. Also the fact that every single public bathroom has sex trafficking signs in it.
Starting point is 00:34:16 Being like, if you're being trafficked to call this number. Right. Yeah, like every single spot on the strip. And then also just like even restaurants I would see in like Summerlin and shit. Which is a good resource. It's a good thing to have. And then also just like, even like restaurants I would see in like Summerlin and shit. Right. Which is a good like resource. It's a good thing to have. It's also terrifying. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:34:29 But it like creates this fear. Like you're like, what I, at any moment, what's going to happen to me? It's a sketchy ass place. Every sign just says, look out.
Starting point is 00:34:37 Yeah. Whoa. Why? I just, I've never been a gambler. I do love a little bit of a gamble. Like I like a Pokemon card or I like, what do I like?
Starting point is 00:34:49 I love a Genshin Impact. A Genshin Impact. Yeah. You get a cool, are they called heroes or characters? What are they called in Genshin Impact when you open a guy? I don't know. I don't even know.
Starting point is 00:34:59 I play it and I'm like addicted to it. I don't know. I just say little, I just say little guy. You just get a guy. Yeah. When you get a rare guy, I played Genshin Impact like for it i don't know i just say a little i just say a little guy you just get a guy yeah when you get it i played games in impact like uh uh for i don't know a dozen hours like three years ago you get a guy and he's got stars he's got a lot of is he a is it stars that he has
Starting point is 00:35:16 i don't know yeah the rarity thing yeah it's like five and four star yeah and you're like oh yeah fuck yeah dude i got i'm actually a better person now that I have. If I get a, like we went to a Pokemon go event this week, weekend at the Rose bowl and it was fire. So, Oh, Oh, you don't even want to open this can of worms to the Johnny's by the way,
Starting point is 00:35:39 if you were very friendly, real quick, we'll say, so we were both at the Rose Bowl for Cine Tour and a ton of people who were fans of Sad Boys came up. A couple of people
Starting point is 00:35:51 came up and said that us talking about Pokemon Go six months ago got them into the game and now they were, they had traveled like from across the country
Starting point is 00:35:58 to go to this event. Haven't received a penny from Nintendo. It was like, it was like I have, so yeah. What about Jordan? shout out to the pokemon company international this is not sponsored but hey i'm available um but uh first number one the
Starting point is 00:36:13 yeah so so pokemon go is like it was at the it was at the peak of peaks back in you know 2016 yeah and then it fell off but when you have like 200 million people playing the game, the fall off is like there are still tens of millions of active players. Oh yeah, my mom loves it. Yeah, and so. Oh yeah, that's really sweet. Yeah, she's always on there. My partner's entire family is now really active in the game.
Starting point is 00:36:38 Oh, Saturday I went around with, shout out Trey. My friend Trey from Texas brought his mom and dad out and i'm friends with him on pokemon go we were just walking around playing and it was the dream i i was saying this on stream i haven't seen maybe i just don't do anything other than play pokemon go but it's very cool to see an environment like a space where all of these people from like cross generations from like very very young to like you know grandparents uh all sharing in the same experience it's like it's like it's not like we're sharing they're sharing wisdom or anything like that it's like oh no you've got the pikachu with a hat that i want can we we trade? Like I met a woman from Boston and close.
Starting point is 00:37:30 And she wanted, I wanted armored Mewtwo. She wanted my shiny Tropius. And we traded. Did you catch my drift? She was, she was, okay. She was so stoked. We like huggedged afterward it was just like so wholesome and then she was like i hope you have the best time and i'm like i hope you have the best time and we would never cross paths otherwise you know and i love that like i i genuinely like brings
Starting point is 00:37:58 brings me joy it was a very it was a very sweet day do you have like a similar type of person? If somebody comes up to you, you can kind of tell in advance like, Oh, this is a Nephilim. Um, yeah, kind of, you know,
Starting point is 00:38:12 they have like, they always have a look in their eye. You know what I mean? I do know the look. Yeah. They always have like the look and it's like, okay. Sometimes it's a look and a little bit of a whisper and then like a look back.
Starting point is 00:38:21 Yeah. And then, Oh, they saw me. Yeah. I've definitely gotten like, it's wild. I went to Disney with my family last year and I could like tell when people were like looking at,
Starting point is 00:38:30 and I'm like with my family, you know? And I'd be like, that guy knows who I am. You know, and then they'd eventually come up and make their way over, you know? You don't want to seem conceited, but you can kind of tell. You can like, cause they, I don't know, they stare at you. Right, and it's like not a normal stare.
Starting point is 00:38:42 Cause you'll see them look at you, and they'll see them talk with their friends and be like that. You know, like you see them do it. I've picked up on the mannerism now. I never used to be able to though. Cause I also just don't look at people when I'm out. You know, like I'm very like kind of just, I don't think it's like the New Yorker in me. Like I'm just like, gets where I'm going.
Starting point is 00:38:56 Right. You know, I'm just focused on like that. So, but now I'm definitely a lot more like aware of like people like, look, cause also like, you know, I've always had like colored hair and stuff like that's people always been looking at me my whole life right you know but now i'm like really aware of it yeah yeah you know look at these it's called hair pronouns right guys what's the deal with that so i could actually go to type five i'd love to oh yeah you can do that after i we'll do we'll uh shut off the mics i mean we'll do it we'll keep everything on turn up the game
Starting point is 00:39:25 we'll turn it up really loud so everyone can hear you hey what's going on with this it's like ladies or something well she got all this
Starting point is 00:39:32 metal in her nose what's that about do you think I could do that would I look nice that's the stuff should I get one yeah that's what I always do
Starting point is 00:39:40 beep beep beep beep beep beep oh what's the deal what the hell is a magnet to your face yeah nothing that sounds bad it's not magnetic yeah it's like, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. What the hell is a magnet to your face? Nothing. That sounds bad. It's not magnetic.
Starting point is 00:39:48 Yeah, it's not magnetic. They use different alloys for that. Are you tempted to come back to LA? Oh my God, I miss it. Yeah, I don't know. Again, like I kind of moved a little impulsively. I don't know. I work so much harder out there.
Starting point is 00:40:00 Like I'm way more focused. You know what I mean? When you're in New York. Yeah, when I'm in New York. Like, cause also I have nothing else to do you know though fair enough um and it's so it's like i don't know i like it again i don't know i've mixed feelings but i miss everybody i'm so lonely i'm like all my friends are here and i was hanging out with everybody last night and i hung out with some friends like at my homie's studio last night and i was like
Starting point is 00:40:23 yeah it makes me so emotional i don't know i wish i could be in two places at once some people do that but then they have to travel a lot yeah and again thanks the dog if i didn't have like my dog like and i love him i would never obviously but um or if i could like drive because i can't drive either so that's a whole thing you're in good company yeah hell yeah we're all late drivers here. So late I'm doing it. I'm nuts. I don't think I should have the ability to go wherever I want, whenever I want.
Starting point is 00:40:52 You know what I mean? I have this whole runaway thing, which I think is also why I like to move around, which is partially why I moved and why I like to move around a lot. Because it's like, I just have a bad day. And it's like, where's Emma? I don't like, you know, I'd just be MIA. It's like, oh, I drove to Vancouver. I didn't even know you could fucking do that. How did you get up there? I would do some weird shit i think i you know like you'd be like oh like i'm in cancun how did you get over i don't
Starting point is 00:41:11 know it's scary i'm on a beach i just someone hurt my feelings and now i'm here i'm married yeah i started a new life i have a five-year-old i am i i hear you but i also believe that like those experiences help build in your brain like a response where when certain stimulus happens again you're like okay i want to go away but then when i do that i tried it instead of going hypothetically i don't want to do that because then what would happen i would be away from my friends who i like yeah like well i try that and i know how i felt so now i have that experience to like grasp onto which i think is valuable definitely it's never like moving has never been a thing that like freaked me out i always like i'll probably move around like forever i think yeah you know oh yeah because when i was you know like wrapping up college and everybody's
Starting point is 00:42:03 going their separate ways a lot of people stayed around in the area. Like I went to school in Georgia and which is, you know, a step up from Florida at the very least. And the. Damn, we take him down to Jersey, destroyed. Destroyed. Gloucestershire, pwned. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:22 Florida. Nevada. Forget about it. Nevada. Reno. For for real i wish i could um but uh but anyway we had some um some topics that we wanted to get to today because there's just some stuff happening online and that's kind of the this is the part of the show where we say um hey we had a thumbnail that was not about mental health because nobody clicks on those just kidding we got your ass now we're talking about feelings
Starting point is 00:42:50 we got you and this is the other things also portion of the show but also uh we want to talk about how maybe we're doomed so uh jordan you've seen some of the project sora stuff i know you haven't i have seen a little bit of it you've seen none yeah okay so we're gonna set this up open ai uh largest uh ai company right now they're the creators of chat gpt yeah uh they recently had some insane corporate drama where they ousted their ceo and then brought him back it was an insane week it was like it was a whole success season of succession in like a weekend he came back as an android he came back as an android he had a scar on his eye
Starting point is 00:43:30 there's no time to explain um we have to make weird looking footage uh yeah in my time things are different we have to change um okay so suck yeah the movies are bad we uh monitor one off again by the way but oh yeah can we pull up some of those videos so the project sora is now instead of they also do dolly which is like the image generator um ai image generator they're now doing the video i know and the video is like have you seen will smith eating spaghetti okay wait okay this is great it sounds like a uber the cats will like take it in for a second yeah they're like those words shouldn't go together like all right oh yeah here it is okay so this
Starting point is 00:44:21 this is this is right we were last year we around this time we were all looking at ai images we were talking about the uncanny valley element of them yada yada yada you're making eye contact with it you can't hurt you are you sure no you can't. He comes downstairs. He's like a fucking FNAF animatronic. Old spaghetti wobbling back and forth. So this video went viral because of the way that it looks.
Starting point is 00:44:56 So let's watch that. Real. But this is important to know where we were at last year. This is a finesse. This is very unnerving. But it's like, okay, while it is bad, there are elements of it that are like, every individual square of this video, if you just like took a little piece.
Starting point is 00:45:26 Yeah. You're like, okay, that's, that's an ear. That's like, that's a low taper. Recognizably Will Smith.
Starting point is 00:45:32 Yeah. Yeah. The AI said, Hey, you didn't say how smooth it needed to be. I technically showed you Will Smith eating spaghetti. And now we don't have, we don't literally have Will Smith eating spaghetti. We do have this video, which is AI generated.
Starting point is 00:45:48 I could see that. Yeah. Oh, it's Will Smith. With the textures. It's Will Smith eating puppy. But yeah, it's like things have gotten a lot better. Is there an update? Because if this was on Shutterstock and they were saying it's just puppies playing in the snow, I'd be like, I wouldn't question it.
Starting point is 00:46:04 Right. Yeah. Is there an updated will smith eating spaghetti will smith just uh posted on his instagram and tiktok a video of himself actually eating spaghetti to make a joke but yeah this is this is another one it's pretty far off the bed it's crazy and it's like if it wasn't for her face yeah these are a few like this is AI generated and it's like we're getting to the point where this is one year
Starting point is 00:46:32 that's I think that's the craziest thing is that this is just one year that one's real by the way it's AI no I know him he's not real this one was one's real by the way this is a guy that's a guy now i know him no we had spaghetti together yeah that's mark this one was uh the prompt was to like generate a movie trailer for like a man
Starting point is 00:46:52 a spaceman who wears a knitted uh helmet and it's like i hate it it's like it's like you know the progress is pretty apparent it's like until you start to pixel peep and look into it it's so uh so now everybody's like okay all right so next year's the apocalypse or whatever oh yeah this is two dogs podcasting oh that looks good sharing the same mic unprofessional yeah that other dog should probably there They're two different mics too. Yeah, two different mics. What brand mics are those? They do look like they're on a green screen.
Starting point is 00:47:29 Yeah, yeah. One of them got canceled, unfortunately, for some of the stuff he said. Because of the woke mob, you know? Yeah. The toxic gossip train took down another level. Golden Retriever destroyed by the woke mob. So that, I think it's just like man uh they're not releasing this to the public right now nor should they because it'd be will smith doing something way worse yeah
Starting point is 00:47:55 but because now it's like all the ethicists have to you know they i think there's some sort of process they're going through to make sure that there's no way to use this for evil in like the obvious ways like uh ai pornography and and things like that yeah but people can override that shit easily that's the thing if they want to do it they're going to get it done well there's going to be people who uh if they're not using exactly this technology there's going to be competitors who don't have the same yeah who don't care yeah who don't care how do you feel like especially from being a designer and artist point of view no what's your yeah emotional instinct is hate it yeah yeah i hate it like yeah i don't know just know just know yeah it's just that's generally how i feel. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:45 It's just there's no way to make it without like again stealing from other people. Exactly. That's the whole thing. Because it's all trained on and even if it's like licensed or legal it's still like hyper derivative and it's very different for like a human artist to learn from like tracing the works of other people in practice. Yeah. human artist to learn from like tracing the works of other people in practice yeah uh then to train an ai on the works of other people and then create something commercial in their style yeah thus like sort of kind of uh flooding the market with very cheap to produce not like ai art yeah i mean i don't want to gatekeep expression or whatever but there is this like i mean even this this the thread we saw a second ago that guy just posting all the examples
Starting point is 00:49:30 it's very telling to me and almost like uh uh the audience that is the biggest advocate so this kind of thing are pretty disrespectful to even the concept of creativity and seem to think that the only thing that is holding them back from making beautiful illustrations is the technical element as opposed to half of artistry being, you know, your execution. Yeah. Practicing literally drawing something
Starting point is 00:49:59 or literally ideating on something. And then half of it is having an idea and honing it and like rebuilding it and they're acting as though that first half doesn't matter at all it's like make me a movie and it's in space and the guy has a knitted hat you're like problem is i don't have the money to film that and that's why my great knitted hat movie hasn't been published right i'm not good at writing or not an interesting person or for some reason i wanted to make a movie about a guy in space with a knitted hat none of those
Starting point is 00:50:29 things matter it's just the only reason i don't have a clothing brand is because i didn't spend enough time learning to illustrate or i don't have a copy of photoshop that's what's getting in my way it's not yeah you know there is nothing that makes me more irrationally angry online is the kind of guys who will be like, here's a thread of I'm an expert AI prompt writer. And I can write the best prompts to make my AI make beautiful images. the ways that uh you thought like not like by my course but basically overselling their skills as a oh yeah as an artist like they call like an ai artist i don't know it's there's something about it this this is the new the genre of uh smarmy ai bros getting dunked on by real artists uh it hurts but i had to do it you know uh invincible uh screen cap ai art actual artists look what they need to mimic a fraction of our power right and then very ironic
Starting point is 00:51:32 you made this post without using your own art go to the next slide it's an animator for invincible oh my god that's such a the next one is even better oh learn how to color properly or learn how to draw to begin with not even in your dreams will you be able to make an illustration like this it's an animator for one piece it's such a weird like it kind of says a lot where like art for those people is yeah you have to have drawn it yourself to argue with someone online that's what like art is about it's about winning yeah pwning a lose a noob online also that i you know i can't draw for shit i think i could illustrate that one piece frame it's just it's pretty simple it's also yeah
Starting point is 00:52:19 um it's like a and on purpose but it's like a high school sketch feel like i could have knocked i have so much respect for for artists just i saw them post uh this artwork of this is my expression what i want to show but it's being gatekeeped by the woke left who are afraid to let me create art and it's a sketch a warped fucked up looking sketch that's really unpleasant and poorly done of a anime high school cheerleader beheading uh like old style british dragon and everything's bad about it and when somebody asked him like what is this expert like what are you doing he just replied like it's epic it's an epic win guys dude that is an elon musk ask reply yeah i'm surprised it's not his profile picture right now we will get to
Starting point is 00:53:11 yeah it's an nft style yeah hexagon elon's gonna make a cameo in uh one of the things that we're talking about uh because i want to move on to what has been captivating my feed um which is the well how would i describe this uh let's just watch let's actually without spoiling it let's just do we have the original video what's a piece of trauma that you have that's funny it has to actually be funny i'll go first my dad abandoned my family when i was five years old. That is a wife and four kids. He abandoned us and then pursued amateur breakdancing and he got really good. He like blew up. Like he became like a D-list celebrity status, like viral breakdancer. He became like the oldest actively competing breakdancer in the world. Then he got on Good
Starting point is 00:54:02 Morning America and talk shows and Washington Post wrote about him and he went super viral and he did all these interviews and he danced with Paula Abdul. Here, I'll show you. Let's see, take a look at this 60 year old break dancer. Yes, 60 years old. Amazing. This guy wouldn't pay my medical bills.
Starting point is 00:54:25 Look, I don't I can't do that at all. It's not quite good enough to leave a family. Yeah. At least he did something. My dad just died. Lazy.
Starting point is 00:54:39 I don't know why. So maybe maybe. He'd be about 60 probably and he would be white we think yeah maybe if my dad made it to 60 he would have been able to break down yeah that's when he unlocks like a skill tree yeah he gets like a passive it doesn't even matter you choose anything what's up okay maybe this is wild it's better than not doing it like it if i found out my dad did b-boy stuff or better yet like uh i i stand staunchly by this statement i could be wacky wild crazy i think if january 6th happened the way it did but one person was just doing the sickest fucking karate ever
Starting point is 00:55:27 like kicking the door down they did it with a bit like a roundhouse kick that's what the viking guy thought he was doing yeah oh if he was legitimately cool 10 percent less obviously january 6 is bad this one part this is pretty tight that guy that was carrying the flag if he was spinning it like a bow staff the whole time i don't know it's like piercing the wall i'd be there the next day so this story we're gonna go somewhere with this oh but uh how do you think she maddie here is presenting this story it's i i would say she's being pretty light-hearted about this it's a very normal tiktok it's a normal tiktok she's complimenting the dad she's he's it's beautiful i mean he didn't want to pay for my medical bills
Starting point is 00:56:19 but i mean look at him yeah he shouldn't be able to move like that she's having a sense of humor about it right he's dancing, he paid for his classes. That's more than most deadbeat dads do. Yeah. Again. You can be like me. Never give up. To this day, don't know mine.
Starting point is 00:56:33 Kind of low-key, maybe a little bit, doing a few Facebook messages with some people that I met on like DNA websites to kind of maybe figure out, maybe just a little bit, who maybe my dad possibly is. Just to see. I don't care. Today's the day.
Starting point is 00:56:51 Oh. It's Will Smith eating spaghetti. He's spinning on his head. Oh no. He rides in on spaghetti like the silver surfer. Like Frozone. Yeah, like he had spaghetti like come under him ew
Starting point is 00:57:06 I'd rather you weren't here um okay uh Jacob you know Maddie right yeah I know Maddie this this person
Starting point is 00:57:14 yeah she's a wonderful person she looks familiar yeah so I thought she's like a comedian on she's on TikTok yeah yeah so I thought
Starting point is 00:57:21 that was crazy when Jacob was like oh yeah we've hung out and I was like oh well there you go you got a sideways connection but anyway i what you take away from this is
Starting point is 00:57:28 haha that's hilarious and comes from a bit of sad it's like a classic comedy thing where it's like let me take something that is probably rooted in some trauma and let me make it into a funny thing yeah okay so he responded i yeah i can imagine oh and did he respond? The phone is spinning around because it's on his head. Oh, my God. Look at him. I'm going to read. Don't spoil it. Okay.
Starting point is 00:57:50 I'm going to read his response for the audio listeners. I wake up at 6 a.m. to find that my daughter has posted a TikTok video trashing me. She's a big social media influencer with millions of followers here it is now can we go to maddie's tiktok like what how many followers does she have okay 72 000 followers is a lot of followers don't get me wrong but this man is presenting it like she's fucking kylie jenner yeah like sicking her sicking her fucking yeah millions is crazy millions of followers it is okay to not have millions but it's also okay to be honest in your in your post yeah and so then he did uh i would say if you don't people to talk about it
Starting point is 00:58:40 don't do fucked up things you know valid like dancing yeah exactly cringe dancing is for girls yeah we know that oh that's cute damn and his username is him and his like new wife that's crazy yeah i love that so this is his video now we're it's long he's so funny looking he's like a bitcoin shit i was gonna say he's oh that's sick uh he definitely looks like the thumb thumbs from Spikens. He's wearing a Bitcoin shirt. I was going to say. Oh, that's sick. He definitely looks like Crypto Bro Patrick Stewart. He's Crypto Bro Professor X. High neck, crew neck t-shirt under the Dan Flashes style Bitcoin shirt. Shout out to Anastasia.
Starting point is 00:59:19 Yeah, not even complicated enough of a pattern for Dan Flashes, but very clear Bitcoin logo. His chair is so low. This is a dad chair. He's very sunk in. You can tell he spends most of his time there. This is how I want to sink into a chair, though, when I play video games. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:37 And I haven't been able to find a chair where I can sink in. So we may clown you a little bit, Ben, but if you can hit me up with a chair recommendation, I'll take it all back. A dub's a dub. And he can dance. He can schmooze. He can.
Starting point is 00:59:49 He can dance. He does better than me. Okay, I wake up at 6 a.m. to do some work. I get my coffee. I sit down. I open my computer. And what am I greeted with? Well, hundreds of comments calling me a deadbeat dad.
Starting point is 01:00:03 Anybody else not expect that voice at all? I did not. Did not expect that voice at all i did not did not expect that oh goodness i woke up today yeah that was yeah typically what guys that look like that sound like there's the rules yeah it's not too far off he could be from anywhere but once he went bald it like kicked in yeah perfect haircut for people he doesn't need a head or anything yeah just polish that shit. Well, after a few minutes of investigation, I discover that my daughter,
Starting point is 01:00:28 Maddie, has made a video. This is the nerdiest commentary video of all time. This is wild, dude. It's close to find out. I'm clapping back today.
Starting point is 01:00:38 My. So I did. It's like a Ben Shapiro. Yeah. She tried to read me to filth. She tried to pony me online. Unfortunately. She tried to pony on line. Unfortunately, I was greeted with hundreds of comments. Dude, the timeline with Ben Shapiro just goes hot in a break.
Starting point is 01:00:51 Oh, dude. He's so much better. It's not too late. Yeah, I feel like he's in a small size. Low center of gravity. Yeah. Ben, if you're watching, we know you are. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:00 I love sad boys. Oh, please. I tune in every week. Oh, no. She's also A big social media Influencer With millions of followers Some of her videos
Starting point is 01:01:10 Get millions of views And this video Has tens of millions of views One million likes 20,000 comments 40,000 bookmarks 30,000 reposts Shout out to my
Starting point is 01:01:22 Shout out to my Screen reader users This man is going full screen reader mode. This is going to be a tire. Oh, it's 10 fucking minutes? I don't think we can watch this whole thing. But also shout out to and this many
Starting point is 01:01:37 bookmarks. What if the rest of the 10 minutes was him listing other analytics? 400 million impressions. And her next video had 100 000 views with 67 000 likes and i'm glad and i love her oh okay tight but he is upset and he is the debbie doubt i thought the tiktok lie was going to be that she just made it up entirely and that was just some guy that was on good morning no so in this video he does not deny what she alleges in the video he just blames her for it is that what it is yeah you can't dance yeah dude like uh
Starting point is 01:02:13 sorry you weren't born with my six skills maybe if you followed in my footsteps i would have taken you back in yes hollywood bullshit there are less impressive things that guys have like to become a motorcycle guy or something it's like less impressive when i called my dad and told him i was internet famous he told me i should join the cia uh wow that's the second step to yeah i was like hey dad i have a million followers because i kind of had to like let him know you know that like hey this is a thing now so you have to like be aware, you know, people are probably going to try to find you now. Because that's like life. And he's like, I have like a million followers, you know, on the internet now.
Starting point is 01:02:52 He's like, okay. You know, the CIA is hiring. I'm like, okay. Is he in the CIA? No. Sounds like a knock. Yeah. He wish he was, but no.
Starting point is 01:03:01 That's a certain generation of guy as well. Yeah. No, he was very like he really like if you talked to him you would have thought like he was like in the war and i think he just really like he just fantasized about it like all the time very jersey kind of oh i'm trying in the war yeah he's just kind of yeah that's jersey oh i'm gonna i don't know we just had like random like military shit like all over the basement and like weird, like propaganda.
Starting point is 01:03:26 It was like very concerning. It was like super, it was like baseball and like the army was like his hyper fixation. I wonder which parent I inherited the autism from. And yeah, it was, it was, but yeah,
Starting point is 01:03:39 if you talk to me, you would have thought like he was like overseas, like on the front lines, but he, he was just, he was an attorney. That's like stolen dollar it's like hey you can't have that it was like one step away he'd also do this thing you know like um this is so off topic i'm just talking about weird yeah you know there's a thing for like um baseball fans there's this thing called yankee
Starting point is 01:03:59 fantasy camp where you can go role play as a yankee and go to like spring training and stuff yeah oh and you get like a little uniform and everything. As an adult? Yeah, as an adult. I saw recently there was a, I think it was maybe NBA All-Star Weekend or something. It was some basketball, some normal, like NBA court. But it was like a bunch of rich businessmen could rent rented it out to play their like rec league game or something this is lopping i mean this is just lopping and i'm like foam swords the whole deal
Starting point is 01:04:31 i would do that too if i could i guess yeah but it's just so funny to see the like um morgan stanley executives or whatever like yeah one of those guys buys like a to scale x-wing and like he's like no it's memorabilia it's gonna be worth something i-Wing. And like, he's like, no, it's memorabilia. It's going to be worth something. I'm like, you can just like Star Wars, man. You're allowed. You're going to get in trouble. Dude. Oh my God. Doing it.
Starting point is 01:04:50 He's at least signed baseballs, but I'm like nobody valuable. Like they were worth nothing. Yeah. You know, I don't even know where they ended up. Yankee camp. Yankee fantasy camp. You can't call it camp when you're over 18. It stops being camp.
Starting point is 01:05:02 Yeah. No, he had to be like well into his 30s and 40s while he was doing this. I, okay, counterpoint to all of this. Maybe I would maybe just a little bit like to go to a camp as an adult. Oh, yeah, dude. But that's hilarious. Yeah. That you could go to army camp as well.
Starting point is 01:05:17 Can you enlist in the army when you're like older? I 100% can. I don't know. What's the cutoff? I don't know. That's my plan, actually. Yeah, it's kind of weird. The American military. Oh, hell yeah. I'm going to become a Navy SEAL. That'd be cutoff? I don't know, but it's my plan actually. Yeah. It's kind of weird. American military.
Starting point is 01:05:25 Oh, hell yeah. I'm going to become a Navy SEAL. That'd be cool. Which is a rumor I tried to start like a year ago. It's a lot of work. Oh, come on.
Starting point is 01:05:32 It's a, no, it's like, it's like getting a driving test where it's like more lenient once you're over like 25. Oh yeah. They're just like, we'll take you.
Starting point is 01:05:38 Did you have a hyper-focused type thing where you would go to a camp for it? No, never. No. Well, you said that like fashion design was the first thing you wanted to do. Yeah, I was like a five-year-old. It wasn't like a super long thing.
Starting point is 01:05:50 I wanted to be a fashion designer or I wanted to be a goth rock star. That's... I put that on my student of the week poster when I was five and then my favorite color was black and they had to be like, hey, she's five and in Catholic school.
Starting point is 01:06:02 What the hell is this about? I mean, I feel like that's our brand. We have to fix her with powers. Yeah, and then I still ended up goth, so I don't know. But that's cool because you like, it's like cool to find yourself and then be like, I was right. Yeah, I was at least like, you know, I find a lot of comfort that child me,
Starting point is 01:06:20 if they saw me right now, they'd be like, oh, hell yeah. Like I did everything that child me wanted me to do. Oh, the same, yeah. That's nice. Like they wanted me to be, I wanted be like, Oh hell yeah. Like I did everything that child me wanted me to do. Yeah. That's nice. Like they wanted me to be, I wanted to be like an internet famous little email bitch. And it kind of worked out that way. I wanted to be in Nevada.
Starting point is 01:06:32 I went, yeah. My, uh, one of my yearbooks that I have over there has someone who signed it. It says, I'm sure I'll see you on YouTube someday. And I was like,
Starting point is 01:06:41 what did you know? Like, cause I, yeah, it was weird oh and they also said uh doing something related to high school musical also i think they said oh yeah it was very on point they uh shout out to helen though shout out to helen she uh i think she finished her phd in history at berkeley uh and maybe she also has a phd in the future they might have implemented it now.
Starting point is 01:07:06 We should see what else she could predict. I know. What else do you know? Yeah. She has reverse history. I finished my PhD in the future. Who was coming back with the scar and the cybernetic guy? Oh, Patrick Stewart.
Starting point is 01:07:19 I can't even remember. It's all blending together. Something I was going to say. I was going to try to call back to that, but I couldn't remember the details. What's the dad's, like, what's his counter? Just, it's mean. together something i was gonna say i was gonna try to call back to that but i couldn't remember the details what's the dad's uh like what's his counter just it's mean don't say that don't call me yeah let's watch a little bit more if we jump ahead or watch this video and frankly i was pretty chagrined by what i heard this guy frankly this guy talks like a simpsons character. He talks like a fake white guy.
Starting point is 01:07:46 He talks like Dave Chappelle's impression of a white guy circa 2000. Do you think he's putting it on a camera voice? Do you know how normal people, they're not used to being on camera, so they start acting all weird? Right. I was chagrined by what I heard. I mean, he's got to do fake AVA sometimes at some point in his B-boy career. Oh, he's dapped somebody up. And he's definitely said my soul brother.
Starting point is 01:08:08 Oh, yeah. He definitely said that. What's tracking, brother cousin? Yeah. Brother man. But honestly, the more I watch this video, the more I like it. Well, I like about 98% of it. However, I do need to correct a few statements in the video.
Starting point is 01:08:25 I would like to correct. Like, he's already off on the wrong foot by, like, this millions of followers shit. Where it's like, it seems small, but I can already tell the, like, hyperbole or, like, the sort of half-truths that are going to come out. Like, and she wasn't even, she didn't give, like, a lot of detail. She wasn't like. She wasn't even she didn't give like a lot of detail she wasn't like she wasn't like fuck my dad or anything no she literally said don't she said i'm amazed she said i i you know and i don't want to put any of her stuff on blast like it doesn't matter who you are she wasn't making fun of him she wasn't saying he sucked she said look he's sick yeah he's cool and she to him. Yeah. He's cool.
Starting point is 01:09:06 And she said he should be able to dance like that. This is crazy. That's such a funny one. I'm imagining a world where he didn't leave, but he's like, everyone thinks he's cheating on his wife. He's like, oh yeah, I've got another conference. I have to leave town. Like, what do you do? Who do you meet up with?
Starting point is 01:09:19 That's a movie, by the way. They walk into the hotel. He's spinning on his arm. And he gets up. He takes a deep breath after like a relief. He's got like a Don King-esque trainer where they're like, keep spinning. Don't stop spinning. They're like slapping him.
Starting point is 01:09:36 All right. Let's see. First, let's just watch Maddie's 90 second video. And then I'll give you my comments. What's a piece of chalk? Okay, we can skip past that. A politician in Philadelphia. Cool Bill. second video and then i'll give you my comments what's a piece of okay we can skip past that this right here is a wholesome video that's beautiful this is what he should have released he should have released him smiling and going oh and then maybe maybe a little bit maybe i should
Starting point is 01:09:58 call my kid maybe i should call my kid pay a medical bills maybe yeah just a little bit or apologize for that i mean you do whatever i don't know what the bag is you get from B-Boying. It's probably not spectacular. That is a nice shirt. This is B-Boying's name because his name is Ben Hart. You know, I'll get texts like this. Happy birthday, question mark. And then, like, links to his breakdancing videos.
Starting point is 01:10:18 That's true. You have funny trauma. Like, that's funny. Legend. Oh, my God. That's so good. I like him. Okay, in many ways, I love this video.
Starting point is 01:10:25 And of course, I love my daughter Maddie. And we get along great. At least I think we do. But a few corrections are in order. This gives me the vibe of like a Bill Nye the Science Guy cadence. Yeah. Here's why I left my family. You'd be surprised.
Starting point is 01:10:41 The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell. And I'll show you why i miss my son that need to be put in context first i can see that as a five-year-old maddie would see her dad as having abandoned the family one day i was living there the next day i wasn't and that will look like abandonment to a child but married couples do get divorced about half the time in America. And I was just living a mile or so down the street in LaGrange, Illinois. We just weren't living under the same roof. Now, about not paying medical bills, that's just not correct.
Starting point is 01:11:18 Here was the financial arrangement of the divorce. Maddie's mom, my ex-wife, got $2 million at the get-go. Out of the gate. A lump sum payment. Plus, I was paying her $18,000 per month in child support and alimony. This was later reduced to $12,000 per month.
Starting point is 01:11:38 And, of course, I paid health insurance and out-of-pocket medical costs. I also put $600,000 into the kids' college fund. In all, I paid out about $5 million. There's something missing here. This is, you just dropped, yeah, I paid the medical bills. I bought the hospital.
Starting point is 01:11:55 Huh? What happened? That's the Bitcoin. That was creepy. One of the things he's missing here is that, like, well, there's a lot of stuff he's saying that's disputed. Like, I don't know the truth but the um the stuff that he did was like allegedly court ordered and not like stuff that he was doing out of the kind of yeah
Starting point is 01:12:17 uh paying child support is a pre-ordained like situation right because it's like required you can't get out of yeah if it's not required then that's just giving someone money yeah it's not called child support and it and if your five-year-old kid if you're a mile away from your five-year-old kid and you don't see your five-year-old kid then what is the difference from being one mile away versus a thousand miles you can live in the same house if you never see him yeah if you're dodging around yeah because if if if my child thought i abandoned them i would maybe call them and have a conversation if that was what i didn't intend to happen maybe they should have driven over to see me validate their feelings try to understand their perspective but he i i feel like
Starting point is 01:12:59 he's like i'm actually well i'm technically correct thank you sir for your here's a reddit gold type response. You know what I mean? Pwning my daughter's claim that I abandoned her when actually it was only by a mile. I'm now a little bit sucked in, and I do want to watch more of this, but for the podcast, we definitely have to cut some of it out. ...wife to cover costs for her and the kids.
Starting point is 01:13:19 And this is in $2,005. So add 50% to account for inflation. In other words, I was not a deadbeat dad at all. And by the way, Maddie did not say that in her video. But a lot of the comments assume that and say that. Why don't men get lip filler? Yeah, he looks like Will Smith eating spaghetti. I think we need to normalize lip filler for men.
Starting point is 01:13:42 Yeah, at least accentuate it with something or other. Yeah. Maybe do like an outreach program. Yeah, like put on some Aquaphor at least. Help me. Yeah. I'm not going to speak on that. I've been blessed with the plumpies.
Starting point is 01:13:54 Not me. I have to inject this shit. Now, of course, there was no way for Maddie to know how much I was paying because she was a kid. This wasn't something I talked about. Also, remember that i was living one mile down the road from the kids in lagrange illinois sidewalks all the way an easy walk or bike ride you're saying it yeah so walk over and see your kid no your five-year-old should walk over to me my kid should bike to me my kid should commute to her. My kid should commute to her father. My kid wants to see me so bad.
Starting point is 01:14:26 They should make the effort. Could you refer to bike at like five for a mile? That seems illegal, right? Unsupervised. Play a road. I would assume something like I would be like, I hope someone's watching that child. Yeah, dude.
Starting point is 01:14:40 And probably with turns. It's not like a mile direct. Yeah, it's not straight down the road. Can't see him. No abandonment, just a divorce. Was I at fault in the divorce? Yeah, I would say it was about 70% at fault. I own that. Maddie's mom and I were really not compatible in many ways. We were compatible in some ways, but not in other ways.
Starting point is 01:15:02 Do I regret marrying Maddie's mom? No, absolutely not. I was going to say, yes, it'd be so funny. Yeah, I could have been a b-boy much younger. They would not have been born. They would not have existed. The kids have turned out great. I know he's saying they would not have existed because they wouldn't have been originally born,
Starting point is 01:15:20 but he sounds like he's going to murder them. They wouldn't have lasted. He's talking like Thanos, talking about what he has to do. It's like that Moist Critical clip where he pulls out the gun. These are Max. Watch my clips. What's up, guys?
Starting point is 01:15:38 What's going on, guys? I would destroy my kids. There's a lot of viral videos going around about how I'm a deadbeat dad. I would take my fingers and erase them from existence. I'm an excellent B-boy. Charlie should pivot. Especially with the long hair. I feel like that would create a cool spinning top effect.
Starting point is 01:15:52 For real. He's like his rival. The cuts on this are so funny to me. I like that he edited it though. Yeah. It's just like. Yeah. And it's still 10 minutes long. He's got that iMovie.
Starting point is 01:16:03 As a video editor myself, every time he goes, and I definitely didn't abandon my children, Matty has become very successful. Do I regret my wife? No, of course not. We were two very different people. Yeah, it looks like he's having an AB with himself. Yeah, he's doing he's doing he's doing
Starting point is 01:16:25 like old school youtube jump cuts yeah yeah literally um so then they said this and what the heck what the hell's going on here oh my god those little sketches did you guys ever seen that video i think i've turned it to you that johnny depp had ever heard apologizing because they tried to get that dog in australia all right I got to know more about Ben Hart, man. Let's keep going. Ben Hart, man. Ben Hart, man. I got to know more about Ben Hart, man. One other slight correction, which I hesitate to even bring up because I love the way Maddie did this in her video. I did not abandon the family for break dancing. I have a career. I'm in the advertising business. Built an ad agency. That's how I was able to afford to pay Maddie's mom $5 million.
Starting point is 01:17:10 Sorry, guys. Maddie's mom and I- I left you to do advertising. I'm not like a bad guy. I saw Mad Men. I'm like, epic bacon. That'll be me, actually. That'll be me. I miss the 50s. He does feel like he thinks that he's in mad men oh yeah for sure yeah you know i mean bitcoin guys are that that is the contemporary yeah they post you know images
Starting point is 01:17:31 of like andrew tay smoking a cigar uh don draper and it's like this these are what men were just miserable people that traumatized from war dudes that will wear like a very loud piece of like clothing, like a statement piece, but like have no like swag to it at all. So it's just like an extremely strange, like it's a Dan Flash's shirt. And then like, you know, like dad jeans and like those, those like big white Reeboks or whatever. Yeah. Sat in his truck. He better be was a truck dad that also did deep deep. I wonder what kind of car he drives.
Starting point is 01:18:06 He's driven around like in succession. I separated in 2004 and divorced in 2005. I took up break dancing entirely by accident in 2012 as a way to get in shape at the age of 54. By accident? By accident? He kept falling over and spitting on his ass. I slept in someone's... that's a perfect pop lock.
Starting point is 01:18:30 Oops. I don't know if you might be wondering, can he still breakdance at age 66? Well, I don't know. Let's see. I'll give it a try. Shut the fuck up. Let's go. That's a Bitcoin flag.
Starting point is 01:18:45 What the fuck? Next to the American flag. Oh, this rocks. And the rest of the video is this. Stop, you're kidding me. I am not. Jacob, skip forward three minutes. That's awesome.
Starting point is 01:19:02 That's awesome. Oh my God. What a legend. One of the things is that it's never too late to start breakdancing. I started when I was age 54. No, that's not the point of the video. That's a beautiful message. There's really no excuse for anyone not to be breakdancing.
Starting point is 01:19:21 Guys, I know what we have to do after this. I know what we're spending the rest of our day upside down yeah no we're at we're ending the podcast on the patreon yeah our bitcoin flag we unfurl it yeah it's fucking draining no there's no reason not to get a trip specifically stop what the fuck how long was he dancing? I think like two or three minutes. That's crazy.
Starting point is 01:19:48 That's incredible. Oh my God. Oh, I love that. Just plain Apex twin and B-boy dancing for four minutes after telling your daughter she's actually fine. Yeah. Actually, I didn't abandon you. I just left. You all turned out fine, so what's the problem?
Starting point is 01:20:04 Actually, a deadbeat dad wouldn't get divorced. Idiot. Watch this. Check this shit out. Oh, fuck, dude. That is kind of a Bitcoin mindset. Like those guys on Twitter where if you're like mean to them or something, they're just like, I actually have $200 million in Ethereum. So who's the loser now?
Starting point is 01:20:24 Yeah. He's like, yeah, you think I abandoned you? Check this out. Whirlwinds for five minutes. There's something so, I obviously would love to have unbridled riches, but there is something utterly ruthless about the people who have hundreds of millions of Bitcoin dollars. Yeah. It's so strange. It's so weird you should have like i
Starting point is 01:20:46 mean i guess the dance it's better than like most of them but i feel like there's a wealth level where you gotta get a boat right come on yeah yeah maybe i mean he's on something yeah maybe he's b-boy dancing on a canal boat i love this guy i hate to sorry jacob to your friend i you know i apologize that they had to go, you know, feel abandoned, feel unsupported. But at the same time, where's the Bitcoin shirt? I know, it's going to get worse. So I love that she stays in the will.
Starting point is 01:21:15 Ooh, gets his baseball hat. Gets his flag. It's a Bitcoin. Where does this go from here, Jacob? Have you watched this? No, I didn't stay around to watch this yeah no valid yeah you're you're totally real for that there's not did you didn't reply to reply oh yeah so she replied do we have that i'm recording a quick response to
Starting point is 01:21:36 all this i'll probably delete this in the morning because like i don't actually have like bad will they never actually do because it's a very funny story it's very silly um i like to laugh at my trauma instead of like being super sad about it but i know my dad posted like a 10 minute video or whatever being like you know my daughter's lying we have a great relationship i have a great relationship with all my kids that's just objectively not true like guys we're all freaking out about this in my family group chat right now we're being like he's so unhinged and delusional we don't know if he actually believes his own narrative or if he's lying on purpose but he's just like a weird guy yeah he said he lived down the street from us that's not true or like if he did it was only for a few months
Starting point is 01:22:12 maybe but actually for most of my childhood he lived in florida with his new wife like basically like i don't want to get into this like again like my video was basically like sanitizing the situation and like putting fun at the lightest parts of that childhood trauma but obviously in real life it was a lot more like complicated and traumatic and it was really hard he left us immediately married another woman we didn't hear from him for years and then he would visit every few months and we'd go out to dinner but like he truly had no hand in raising us at all we don't speak with any sort of regularity he doesn't know when my birthday Like, as you guys saw in the video I posted, he got it wrong. He gave us some money growing up. I like, I honestly don't know the nitty gritty of the financial situation. I really,
Starting point is 01:22:52 really don't. But I do know that several times I've asked him for financial help with medical expenses, like especially like in college and he wouldn't help me. So that's what I was referring to in my video when I was like, he wouldn't pay some of my medical bills. I'll probably delete this in the morning, but I'm, you know, two hard kombuchas in. video when I was like, he wouldn't pay some of my medical bills. I'll probably delete this in the morning, but I'm, you know, two hard kombuchas in. And so I feel the need to kind of defend me and my family's like POV. Bottom line is this guy was a completely absent father,
Starting point is 01:23:14 completely absent father. I don't, he's like, I was just a bike ride away from those kids. And it's like, not once did any of us ever take a bike ride to his house. I've never been in his house ever. So this whole thing is so bizarre. Like I'm so surprised that he responded to my video because i'm just like damn i could have actually made you seem like way worse than i made you seem like in my video i just made
Starting point is 01:23:33 you seem like such a whimsical funny guy like but in real life it was actually a lot darker so i'm so surprised that he responded to it it's obviously kind of hurtful and weird but again we don't really have a relationship so at the end of the, it doesn't have a huge effect on me. It's just kind of a bummer for my family. And we're all kind of looking at this and looking at his response. And we're just like, this is crazy. If this is actually his narrative, it's like delusional. It's very weird to imagine you're like having a dad that is that guy.
Starting point is 01:24:01 Those guys online, like the Bitcoin grifter types that are so internet pilled. But he's 66 years old. You can't maintain this. You can't be saying, I'm a huge fan, colon three. You are the epic bacon, Troy. I love you. And then doge to the moon. And then the kid says, you abandoned me.
Starting point is 01:24:26 And he goes, um, no. Actually. I was a mere cross country biker. Right away. It was just a matter of states. I texted you happy birthday. It might not have been the right day. The name was wrong.
Starting point is 01:24:42 The birthday was wrong. It's like, well, how many things i gave you money what i'm a financial ad executive what more do you want from me you're never too old to stop oh i do the tiny what is this collage what is that is that his new wife his new wife oh i feel like i shouldn't be in i shouldn't be like looking into this man's but he's kind of he's kind of is this guy a fucking like cia spook it's a photo of him talking to nixon then reagan then i think that's bush senior that's bush senior yeah his wife
Starting point is 01:25:16 all right wait is there anything and michael strahan the only other man in this photo is Michael Strahan. And that's his wife, presumably, on the... There's a boat. He's got one. Okay, I'm in the wrong. It's never too late to start breakdancing. Wow. Wow, kind of cool, actually.
Starting point is 01:25:38 Okay. Oh, wait, there's a video. He's wearing a B4 jacket again. And another fucking yeah um okay well but the damage he's done to the b-boy community which we're all a part of of course yes i spin around sleep on my head um was there another tiktok lying thing so while this was a situation where someone was alleged to be lying on TikTok, there are some more objectively obvious people
Starting point is 01:26:07 who have lied on TikTok. It's something I've talked about in videos before. And something we will be talking about on our episode of Sad Boys Nights with Emma on Patreon.com slash Sad Boys Nights I'm sleeping. Emma, thank you so much
Starting point is 01:26:23 for joining us. Thanks for having me me is there anything you want to promote other than nephilim.co no please buy my clothes i need a real job thank you so much you want to buy these clothes so you can go back to gamestop and get back in that yeah you know if it paid adequately i probably would still work there gamestops i do like a game if it would like cover my rent at the least like i would do it. It's sad that stores like that are going away. Yeah. I don't know. With all the stock stuff, it kind of had a resurgence.
Starting point is 01:26:52 I think it would have been on its way out had it not become a stock meme. You know this guy invested in GameStop. Aw, thanks, man. Kept us afloat. I had to work there throughout the pandemic. I was internet famous at working at GameStop at the same time during COVID. That sounds like hell.
Starting point is 01:27:06 It was awkward as hell. Because that was also my demographic. And they'd be like, are you? And I'm like, don't tell people where I work, please. Oh my God. Don't tell people I live here. All right, well, Emma, thank you so much for joining us. Yeah, thanks for coming.
Starting point is 01:27:20 We end every episode of Sad Boys with a particular phrase. We love you. And we're sorry boom i was the super bowl streaker at the game last night and i just got let out of jail this morning and a lot of people are asking look i don't know what literally is happening with the streaker like what the legal position he's in or whatever that man is not spending one night in jail the super bowl commission is probably going to have him killed just publicly executed drawn and courted yeah is probably going to have him killed. Just publicly executed. Drawn and quartered. Yeah, it's going to be projected on the sphere.
Starting point is 01:27:51 The gallows. Go to rich for me

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