Sad Boyz - Carpet Guy Haunts NYC (w/ Drew Gooden)

Episode Date: August 1, 2025

Drew and Jarvis talk about the NYC carpet guys, and the Portland Emo Realtor. Sad Boyz Nightz 123 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Over 100 Bonus Episodes: Sad Boyz Nightz⁠⁠⁠⁠���⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ✨⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find Us Everywhere⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠✨ 00:00:00 Welcome, Drew Gooden! 00:01:22 Drew In LA 00:07:45 Cold Showers 00:11:57 Social Anxiety 00:20:56 Language Barrier 00:24:16 Reality TV 00:27:47 Carpet Guys 00:51:30 Emo Realtor 01:09:57 Nostalgic Music 01:17:06 Sad Boyz Nightz CREW: Hosted by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Jarvis Johnson⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and Drew Gooden (filling in for ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Jordan Adika⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠) Produced & Edited by Jacob Skoda Produced by Anastasia Vigo Thumbnail design by @yungmcskrt Outro music by @prod.typhoon & @ysoblank Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to Sad Boys, a podcast about feelings and other things also. I'm Jarvis. I'm, I'm, we practiced. We practiced this. I don't know. We were starting. I'm Drew. Welcome to Sad Boys.

He did it. He's Jordan. Yeah. Hello. Whoa. I'm Jordan. So is that the thing I'm lying the whole time? I'm lying.

It's just like Jordan is more like a role. It's like the guy that sits on this side of the couch. That's all he is to you. Like if you were playing a sport and you were like, I'm a I'm a shooting guard That's his position That's his position that he plays in Sad Boys That's seems like you have a very personal

Deep relationship with him if that's kind of all you see him As is someone who sits next to you on the couch Yeah it's more like positional relationship Like as long as he's to the left of me we're good Yeah you just need someone to the left of me is Jordan Cool well I'm happy to be here Also if you're lying you're getting the roll pretty spot on True

Jordan loves the lie biggest liar in the game I just I don't know what to trust What he says He's just like Chad GPT. Um, so, uh, Jordan's out. He's out and about gallivanting in his homeland. London town due to visa reasons. And we've been trying to DEI our way into a new person for him.

I'm, I'm adding diversity to you. I guess so. You're tilting the scales. I'll take it. Hey, dude, Drew. Pretty good. You've been hanging out in L.A. recently. You've been bouncing around out here for the summer.

Um, Just for fun, really, just... Which is cool. I like that. Yeah, every time I come out here, I'm like, oh, it's fun. I like it. And it's not humid. It's great.

It feels amazing. It's so fun to be here. I brought my cat out here. That's cool. She sits out on the balcony every day. Dipper likes to, like, if he goes outside, sometimes he doesn't want to come back inside, and he just plops down in the sun. And I'm like, you have too much fur for that.

Aren't you going to get hot? And he's like, probably in five seconds, yeah. But for now, this is the best. It is cute how animals like to just completely bake themselves in the sun. Yeah. Yeah, Ben Bum goes crazy for the sun. Every morning, I open the door, the sliding glass door, and she sprints out to like the brightest sunspot. But she can only last like 10 seconds there because it's like legitimately really hot.

So she'll like be there for a little bit and then overheat and go somewhere else and then go back. And it's like, it's like she just keeps dipping her toes back in, but not. You ever take a bath? Every day. Well, because I realize that I've talked to a lot of adults who either don't have a bath because it's like not in their place or just got so used to showering. But recently I've rediscovered baths as a form of luxurious self care or whatever. Yeah. Not really as effective means of cleaning oneself.

Yeah, because you kind of have to take a shower afterwards. Yeah, it feels like you're at like the beach where you need to like wash off afterwards. Yeah. But I feel that way with a, if I'm, because I've been, I don't even know if it helps, but I've been dealing with some back pain stuff. And so my trainer back in the day was like try Epsom salt bath. And I was like, oh, okay. And I think it's probably like a pseudoscience or whatever.

But who knows? I don't know. I do think, well, I don't know about Epsom salt, but I think just being in hot water, first of all, your weightless, that's fun. Second of all, the heat helps your muscles. I, exactly. And I'm also in physical therapy, so I figure I can have a little treat, you know? Yeah.

And also it's like a place to be without your phone. Yeah, but I do have a place to have my phone. Right. Because I can't be without like a 30 minute YouTube video. So I was wrong. Yeah, yeah. But no, but I am so temperamental with like the temperature. It's like it starts to, it starts like too hot.

And I'm like, okay, we got to add cold water. Yeah. And then I get good. And I'm like, well, now it's a little too room temperature. Yeah, and it gets cold so fast. And so I feel like, boom, boom. in that way. Like I need to keep returning

to the heat space, the hot space. You want to expose yourself to heat, but then it's too much, but then you get cold and so you got to get, yeah. I don't do hot tubs well for that reason. Yeah. I get so tired of the heat and then I'm like, I can't go, I need to jump into a pool. I'm not a fan of baths. I've been taking

more because of my back pain with upsum salts and even if it, I don't know if they work or not, but in my mind they do, so I'm like, yes. Yeah. But I can be in there for like 10 minutes and then I get mad. And then I'm like, no, it's too hot. It's too hot.

I'm sweating. You're really overheating the temperature? Well, that's okay, because I always, like your issue, I just make it really hot and wait until it cools down to my preferred temperature. And then I get in. But even if it's like room tough, I will get hot so fast. It'll start sweating. Because it's more efficient because you know the temperature is going to come down no matter

what. So you might as well start a little too hot and then it will end up at the perfect temperature and then maybe you get out when it gets too cold. But then if you go too hot, then it's just hot the whole time. And then you're like sweating. What am I a soup? I took one bath one time that was really hot and I was like, I almost passed out.

That's how I feel every time and maybe I just need to take cooler baths. Yeah, I do think that I just want to let everybody know you can add cold water to the hot water and it does bring the temperature down. But I feel like it has to be the hottest it can be for it to do anything from my back. So I...

Possible. I don't know if that's true. It's not, but I, in my mind. But I do think hot water, so, okay, I'm a big fan of like Korean and Japanese, bath houses. Like, we live in L.A. We have a bunch of them. I don't know that, actually. Do you go to them? Yeah. Oh. Anastasia's just like the most interesting person I've ever met. Well, that's not true. It is actually true. And it is just lived a thousand lives. And where am I on the list? Like,

number two? How many Korean bathhouses have you been to? None yet, but whatever you want me to do, I'll do it. Okay. I didn't hear about the one time you did a bath and it didn't sound so good. Yeah, that was pretty crazy. If you're interested, Drew, while you're here, you should try some of because it is a experience where, like, you are naked around a bunch of other people. So keep that in mind. I feel like, not that I was ever going to go to a nude beach, but I just feel like that's completely off the table now, now that I have, now that I, you ever think about that?

That was off the table the first time I heard about it because of the way that I feel about my body. Sure, but all of those insecurities, I feel as, yeah, 100% as soon as a shirt comes off. So anything else is just, you know. What if you go to a Korean spa, but you wear a balaclava? Okay, that covers my face? Yeah. Well, it is a funny thing. So face covered penis out?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You got it. Cool. I understand they feel about. Wait a second. Wait a minute. I'd recognize that thing anywhere. Dude, wait.

Was it out there when we, um... My penis? Did anyone let Drew's penis in earlier? The, uh, this morning I got up, looked outside. There was road work happening. I shit you not. And there was a giant in front of my house, giant roadwork ahead sign. It wasn't there when you got it.

Okay, I took a photo. My reputation precedes me. I thought it was the role. I almost texted you and saying they're rolling out the red carpet. Yeah. Just like, that's just right. It was just right in front of the- Just telling me where to park.

Yeah, it's right here, bud. Nice. But the whole point of bringing up the Korean spas was not to actually get you to go there. But it's really cool because they usually have like three or four different pools of water. of varying heat. So what I do is I go into the hottest one. And work your way down. Well, actually, I'll just go from hot to super cold.

And I alternate because there is something therapeutic. Like, I don't, I'm not a scientist, just FYI, but. Could have fooled me. Yeah. I was like, I don't believe you, to be honest. From what I've heard, it is actually therapeutic to do cold plunges and hot plunges. sanas are also supposed to be extremely good for your health, just like overall. I wish I could do a cold plunge.

I think that that's a thing that, you know, those like alpha guys do. And it's the one time when I believe them that I'm weak and they're strong. Yeah. Because I'm like, I don't think I can do it. The only version of a cold plunge that I do every once in a while is I will get into the shower before it gets hot and endure the cold. and then my reward is it slowly gets warmer and it feels kind of nice and my shower takes a really long time to get warm

so sometimes it is like a couple minutes of being cold and I just kind of like and it like wakes me up and then and then it's like a nice relaxing hot shower at the end and whenever I do that I feel like I have so much willpower I want to be like that to the point where I will have a perfectly hot shower

and be like okay Jarvis what if it was cold we're going to try it and I'll make it cold And then here's what my body does. My body goes, who, who, who, who, who, who. Yeah. And I'm like, I don't, what the fuck is this? And then I have to stop.

I have to make it toasty and warm. As Floridians, did y'all never enjoy a cold shower? Like, if I was out and about in Arizona. I mean, even then, it's like a cold, cold shower. It's like that still doesn't feel good. It would just, I just wouldn't make it as hot as normal. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Like when you, like, get inside and get the shower on and, like, you're already kind of cool get the AC cranks. So the cold doesn't feel good anymore. You want it like lukewarm. I will say. I was a cold shower freak in Arizona. Well,

what you were describing was that you didn't have AC. You had like a thing that dripped water and you would stand near the water. And it would be like. And you even hope to get some sort of cooling from that. So I don't. Yeah, you told us that you lived in a Grybitton of Victorian castle where you go to the, you go to the top because,

or you go to the bottom because heat rises. Yeah. You go each lower floor in your castle because it's got cooler air. So it doesn't surprise me at all that you would like a cold shower is the only place you get relieved. Take a cold shower, sit in front of a fan. Since I've started dyeing my hair

red, I have to wash it in cold water because red is like the fastest fading color. And so I start the shower warm and then I have to turn it cold slowly to make sure I don't like freak myself out and then shampoo, turn it back to hot while the conditioner sits in my hair, turn it back to cold.

And it's just like this whole routine. I wish that there was like a I could pay a guy that only showed up, but hear me out. The Anastasia gave me a word look. Well, I think you can. Come on, you said way crazy yourself. I don't even know what you want, but I think you can pay a guy. No, no, no, I can't pay a guy to, like, wash my hair for me.

If I could pay a guy that, like, only exists, like, he truly, like, evaporates out of existence after he does this, which is splash my face with cold water. Because sometimes I don't have the willpower to do it myself, but it, like, it's so effective at waking me up. Why can't he continue to exist when he's done? Because his job's done Okay Yeah Because this is the only part That's fucking

For me He's like a genie Who like Has granted his wish And so he goes back And do his lamp Yeah I just wish

There was a guy I could pay like $1 to splash my face And then die I just wish You know I think you fully understand

Okay Yeah Would you have to pay him If he didn't exist anymore Well you could But I don't want

To take advantage Yeah You know you're right I'm sorry What's the context Where are you? Sorry yeah At home

No when you're When you want water splash on your face. At home. And I can splash it myself. But I don't because I'm scared. Well, okay. What do you,

have you heard of face toner? You just go, see that, but that involves me to do it. And what you're basically describing is like if I had a gun, oh, you have to go. Well,

it's like I don't want to do that because that's going to kill me. Yeah. But then that's how I feel. But if the guy splashed water there and then conveniently ceased existing. Yeah. Then I would get the nice benefits

of splashing cold water on my face. without having some annoying guy up your ass all day. Yeah. Because they have social anxiety and I don't want to have to deal with the guy after he's doing the job. Yeah, no, I understand. I have a friend, our friend Evan, who has like, doesn't have the like social anxiety thing

and he would like, he did a thing where he like hired a guy on Craigslist to like hang out with him. And he'd do stuff like that all the time. It's crazy. I filmed one of them and it was really uncomfortable. Right for you. But then Evan's like, swimming in normalcy it like doesn't make any sense so what did he put the ad out on craigslist

and then someone just answered it yeah so but the so the person at least knew what they were it's like a guy and he's like what's up yeah he's like Jose's gonna clap in the morning to like help me wake up yeah and then there would be like he'd film that and I'm like you but you have this man in your home right reminds me of Nathan fielder a little bit he reminds me of Nathan and fielder in that he doesn't feel like the awkwardness but i want him to go away like i if i could snap away social interactions when i no longer am feeling comfortable yeah a dream instead i just pull your phone out and stop talking that's the best yeah i went to a uh at jacob had a fourth of july party uh jacob's place and i went and i brought my switch in my car in case i got overstimulated

i can go my car and play switch and then i wouldn't have to go home uh because i was worried that I would over-stimulate and then want to go home immediately, but I'm trying to stop being an early bailer. Yeah. Yeah. And so I was like, maybe if I have something that comforts me, I can, like, recharge. It didn't end up having, I also brought Dipper and that helped. I didn't end up needing the switch, but I was glad it was there. Yeah. I think most of the time with social anxiety, it's, it's mostly a pre thing for me where I don't want to do anything beforehand. And then once I'm there, I'm like, almost immediately can assimilate into it and feel fine. And then by the end in the night, I'm like, I don't even want to leave.

Depending on the sit, sometimes you do end up somewhere where you just feel out of place. But if it's like friends that I know and I like being with, it's, I'll still feel anxious, but then I'm there and it's fine. But I just reach a saturation point where I love everyone I'm with. And I'm like, oh, no. It's like I'm on E or something. Yeah. And then I need to go like to a pit stop somewhere.

And my new strategy is maybe if I bring like a Rubik's Cube and like a Nintendo switch into my car, I can hide away. Yeah, and I think in general, maybe even just having the option is helpful. I think having the option, because it's like the, you don't, like when I got a car, it helped me a ton because I can leave whenever I want now. Yeah, I rented a car while I'm out here because I'm here so long and I love the power of going somewhere and feeling the agency of like, I don't have to wait for an Uber. I don't, you know, and I can't drink as much, you know, or not at all really because I'm driving.

Right, exactly. I'm not going to, you know. It's nice. Yeah. Did you get like, when when people were like, oh, you're coming out for for the month, Did people try to, like, plan stuff for you or, like, you know, do you feel like you had a lot of social interactions, like, kind of, like, scheduled out and stuff? Not really. I think if anything, I've planned way less out here than I normally do, because I'm here so long, it's like, well, I got all the time in the world. Right, right, right.

And instead, I haven't really done that much. Part of it was I got sick for, like, a week. And so I was just kind of sitting inside. but normally when I come out here I'm here for like a week and I'm like mid-maxing social interactions and I'm so exhausted by the end but now I'm like oh I only have to do stuff every few days but then my tendency is just

I will just stay inside all the time if I don't it's so easy to not do anything I need people who like create things yeah I never take initiative with plans and I really should be better about it I want to be better at that as well I'll plan stuff for both of you wow you'll be like stop

I can't take it anymore bring someone We're having too much fun. The only thing I'm good about is, like, if I see, like, an improv show I want to go to, you know, like, if I, you know, it's like a scheduled thing that you have to go do at a certain time. But to just, like, go grab drinks. I usually just wait for someone else to be like, you want to come? Yeah, okay. Sometimes it's like, there's certain things that I would enjoy.

Like, for example, I want to go see the new Superman because I heard it was good. And I need to, what would normally happen is if I don't express that to anyone, it would simply exist. my head and then the movie would be on streaming and I would not avoid I would just not watch yeah at that point it's who cares yeah yeah but then I enjoy going to the movies so much but I never initiate and I don't know what you're right you don't want to go alone because you're like and I will go to a movie alone if I really I'm trying to think I've gone to movies alone I've gone a couple times I since I did the AMCA list I'll go to some alone and it's fun it's like yeah I went to I went to Princess Montanoke I'd never seen it yeah I was back in theaters in like

4K and I smoked a little bit and I went and I sat all the way in the back and then I left the moment it ended I like kind of raced out of there because I didn't want to be recognized because I was a little high yeah and it's great and well that doesn't help like the paranoia of like being high yeah yeah it's like everyone's watch they're all turned around yeah they're not facing the screen they're all facing you yeah everybody every seat is faced towards mine I didn't like that just watched princess monaoka and spirited away for the first times like let last week. The only studio

Ghibli movie I'd ever seen was Panyo when I was little. Yeah. And so I'm like diving into the world event and I'm like that. I feel like it's very

you look like a jibly character. Yeah. As soon as I saw the little star things they were feeding the soot sprites I was like I want give me those.

I want those. There's a lot of things where yeah. Have I told my Princess Monono K story? It's kind of weird. You were the lead animator on that film?

Yeah. It was your idea. It was actually my idea because they were going to call it Prince Monono okay and I was like guys know hear me out yeah what if there was like crazy shit in the woods yeah it's crazy now like imagine the wildest stuff yeah like how imagine a bunch of it and i say how and he goes

what's up and i'm like you know how to do crazy shit in the woods right he's like of course like all right you're on the job i called by me and mr miazaki uh as many of you called meia zonky sense mezongi yeah i got to me a donkey that's just like our little me when i'm a zombie donkey Miazzi Sorry That's a great meme I think that's gonna catch on I think that'll catch on

I'm a big Miyazaki head I watch I love watching all his documentaries Like they're amazing He has He's a genius I know when I don't Like

I think genius is a myth But it's not for him Not for him yeah Him and Elon Musk I think I put him in the same Oh God Yeah as far as like visionaries Of our time

Right But what's your story Well Okay, stop me if I've told this on the podcast before because it's somewhat explicit And maybe we cut it But when I was in- I wouldn't know I've never listened to an episode

When I was in middle school And that's the way we like it When I was in- Because you're there for every episode Because you're Jordan Yeah Um That's right

He's Australian Um When I was in middle school This kid Billy invited me over And we were gonna like Play video games and watch movie We saw Princess Mona okay Great movie

And then afterward Billy was like come check this out and we go over to his computer and he pulls up like anime porn and and he's like check he's like look at this and i am like too young you know people develop it different stages but i was not like activated as a i hadn't thought i didn't know what sex was i hadn't given it how old were you 12 11 12 okay and uh and so maybe i was a late bloomer i don't know maybe billy was an early bloomer anyway he was like now it's my turn so you go out but you can go after me

and I'm like what are you talking about and then I just went outside and I'm just like playing my Game Boy Advance or something and then he's like okay it's your turn and I was like for what to like scroll Google images

I thought we were supposed to be having fun man can I play video games please that kid would later like lie about being really good at skateboarding and that's not really something you can lie about yeah because we had skateboards and I skateboarded and

we're like okay Billy do a trick and he's like I kind of hurt myself on the ramp the other day. I hate how much I can relate to that though because I was definitely a compulsive liar as a kid because for the most part, how would they know if you're, I just wanted to be interesting so bad. I remember telling someone like I knew German and then he was like, say a German word. And I think I just said gibberish. You know, whatever.

That means hello. And he's like, no, it doesn't. And I was like, and I got all red. I would just lie. Your name was Klaus Steinberg and you're like, Gubble gabbily And he's like N, nine

Yeah, if like If someone else in class missed a day I would like make up A crazy story About what happened While they were gone You're, wow

And I still do it You're a fucking freak dude Yeah No, I had the same thing I would do small lies I would also pretend to No Japanese And that I would probably say things

That are probably racist Yeah definitely don't do the voice And I'm not gonna do the voice Well I would later take Japanese because I needed to, like, make good on that wish to film it. Right. And I get excited if I watch a, I watch an episode of a sub to anime the other day. And every time they say phrases that you take in Japanese one, I get so stoked.

I'm like, oh, I know exactly what job matane means. It's just been see you later. Yeah, that's me when I hear like the simplest Spanish phrase and it takes me back to 10th grade. Oh, yeah. Cam bien. I have a bad, my experience of Spanish is so embarrassing because I took many years of Spanish studied abroad in Spain. and still refuse to speak, but I can, like, understand decently well.

And so I will just respond in English because I'm so afraid of someone pointing. Like, it would be the thing where if I'm in Japan and I say sending a Japanese and they respond in English, I'm like, okay, cool, English mode unlocked. But in Spanish, I'm like, oh, I should be better than this. I didn't mean to unlock English mode. Oh, they, oh, God, they think so poorly of me. Yeah. I do wonder, anytime I've gone internationally and, you know, Like I went to Italy and it's like you want to learn like some Italian phrases.

But for the most part, like I feel like they would rather you just say it in English than like try to do like a crappy version. It's just like, just say what you want. Like what do you do? I think it depends. It depends on where you are and who, you know. Yeah, because like in the big tourist cities, there are a lot of times you can tell when someone's a tourist. But then I've heard like to my understanding, it could be fairly cultural. Because in Japan, they loved if I spoke Japanese.

But I don't know if it was just to like, oh, you like took a second to learn my language. But I would always get the, oh, your Japanese is so good. And I'd be like, you are lying through your fucking teeth. But I love you for it. Keep praising me because this is all I have. In France, they are mad. In France, they're so mad in France. Yeah, they're like, don't even fucking try.

I speak enough English. You fucking yank. but even like sometimes they'll they do speak perfect english and they refuse to help you out yeah i've seen that as well though i'm only speaking to paris because that's my only experience in france in uh the thing about japan is that a lot of people take english but don't have a lot of practice like speaking it and so they know english way better than i know japanese so i have to like do a peace offering, which is my broken Japanese, to like have them be comfortable to speak English with me. I had a hard time in Mexico because I wanted to improve my Spanish and people

kept speaking to me in English. And they would say things like, oh, do you want to look at the English menu? And I'd be like, no, I'm trying to learn Spanish. Like, can you just keep going with Spanish? And they'd be so frustrated with me. Yeah. They don't want to help you along. your journey. It's just either know it or don't. Just, you know, what do you want? I'm trying to do my job. Yeah. Nihongo Binkio Shima.

I studied Japanese. Nice. Because I'm just. That's all I got. Hey, man, you got it. I watched a couple seasons of Terrace House. Dude! It was so good and then the tragedy happened. I know.

I'm so sad. The tragedy happens. I really fell in love with one season of that show in particular. I can't remember which one, but it was just like the vibe of the show and it was so interesting. I think it was the 2016 one. Were they in Tokyo?

Because they were Tokyo twice. Aloha State in Hawaii. Then they were in like the mountains. I think it was they were just in the city. It's called like in the city. There was one guy who was like a musician. Tapas son. He was like a musician and the one girl kind of liked them and went to it.

He was in a band and he went to one of his shows. She went to one of his shows. Oh yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. It's such an interesting show because you would think like, oh, those two have chemistry they're going to date but they'd be so formal about it like they had chemistry but

they would neither one would initiate anything and then maybe there's like a whole like cold like there's like a whole thing process where it's like oh you have to do this certain type of date and it's like a way where you ask someone to yeah and then they would go on a date and then you'd think like it went well and then they just never talk about it again like it never had it's very very interesting um and the food always looks so good and every time they ate anything i wanted to eat it my favorite thing about terrace house is uh every episode or not every episode every season when they introduce each other around the round table the first thing they ask is skina type which is what's your type like oh i like athletic people or whatever but um i when i went to japan in 2017 uh it was when one of the

the thing is the terrace house people are like regular ass people for the most part and one of them was a barista they like doxed where she like worked in the show and i just like went there and then she was fucking there and i was like this is so cool yeah it was like the best day am I like going to do you know that show vanderpump rules yeah so I'm not a fan but a bunch of my friends are and they're all servers at this one restaurant or a couple restaurants but in the beginning it was just this one restaurant and so me my friends would always like make me go there with them it's called sir it's like a horrible restaurant it's not the food's not good it's so expensive yeah and then you'd be like oh my god peter

was our waiter and he's in the show oh my god peter's spit in my food this is the spit for my the show that i like this is the spit yeah i yeah terrace house had a horrible tragedy happen and so they stopped making the show and love island has had multiple horrible tragedies and they said keep it keep the cash is still rolling well that's the american way yeah and the british way i guess i guess yeah i just listen to this audio book called murder at sex island what is your life that's not what's not what supposed to happen at Texas Island. No, there's supposed to be said. It's not murder Island. Unless you're murdering your pleasure centers

in a good way. Yeah. That's what I describe it in the moment. Girl, you just murder my pleasure centers, dude. It's the dopamine express, choo, oh, God. A murder on the dopamine express. My girl loves when I whispered that in her ear. Yeah. I kind of talk about various neurotransmitters into my girls here.

But it's a comedian named Joe Firestone, who's really funny, and she wrote this book as a parody of Love Island. But it's like Agatha Christie meets Love Island. Wow. Because it's like a detective is sent there. That's a great pitch though.

Agatha Christie meets Love Island. I was like, I'll buy that series. And it's a fun audiobook too. She reads it all and she's very funny. What's the deal with Kevin Carpet? Yeah. I'm bored. It sucks, man.

Let's look at this guy who rolls himself up in a carpet. Let's just watch Mr. Beast's new video. is he like make big train go boom i think he raced a cheetah what's up with that oh yeah oh he did yeah yeah that's not uh yeah cars are faster than animals um earliest known mention of carpagai is a very funny sentence take us on this journey okay okay um so so i was i was one day scrolling on uh tic talk and i came across this video which i think kind of sets the stage sort of rolls out the carpet for uh it sort of rolls out the carpet for cabin for kevin exactly so the text says it's a video of this obstruction of on a sidewalk in new york city

and the text reads there's a person inside of this carpet and he wants you to step on him story time So if you didn't know, there's a person in there. It's a woman. Get in character, Kevin. Kevin the carpet. Kevin Don't Carpet? Rather. He's been going around for literally years.

Typically in the party scenes. What I don't love about this is that's not consensual at all, because nobody knows that there's a person in there. It's actually kind of alarming because they're like moving around inside. and such someone could trip is he trapped in there maybe let him out yeah trapped emotionally yeah clearly he's working through something in some way it's like kind of like an eldridge horror like creature he's like the carpet man yeah he is sort of like a mythical creature yeah well when it moved it and said hello that was pretty unnerving yeah i don't even know that it said hello i they kind

yeah who said hello grunts well it wasn't her was it her maybe i believe that people have wired iPhone headphones only for TikToks. It is sort of a TikTok aesthetic now. Yeah. You know what? I've been thinking about getting wired headphones just so people know I'm on when I'm on the phone. Yeah. I just feel, uh,

yeah. I feel weird because sometimes I walk around, like I go on a walk and I talk to my mom on the phone or something. Yeah. Yeah. And you're saying things like, I'm going to kill you. Yeah.

So my mom? I'm talking to my mom. Don't worry. It's not about you. You're at the grocery store and somebody's like, So should I get beans? And you go, I don't know, man. Do you want beans?

And he's like, hey, dumbass. I'm talking to my wife. I'm asking my wife what I'm allowed to eat. I don't know if other people have this issue. The microphone on my AirPods do not. They do not work. They just like, they're very muffled. But also if you try to record a TikTok with AirPods instead of a wired one,

it's like super delayed between video and audio. It's like weird. I haven't had that experience. So I think it's a you problem. Yeah, I think there is something with the microphone. on the cord because I feel like back in the Vine days there were a lot of people who did that because that was before AirPods.

And it's kind of a fun way to like you could really make the audio clip by really you know kind of has the emphasis there. It's so crisp. I think it's just also the way like holding a microphone in a YouTube video there's something. It's more of a prop. Yeah. Yeah. So I understand from TikTok. It's like an interesting aesthetic that is a

funny like icon of TikTok. Yeah. Because it's just like I just see that less in my regular life. I think it's also. feels very down to earth. It's also interesting in general as we've gotten older, like, I think we grew up when there was like some nostalgia for like the 80s or whatever. And now to see people like younger than us, uh, a stethicize, make an aesthetic out of, um, out of like things we grew, like worst technology that we grew up like an iPod. Like it's so vintage and fun. Yeah, look at

this wheel. It's just so weird to see. It's, but also like it is cool. like the device was cool and it was nice to you know have a I like it I like the idea behind maybe I'm into it getting more physical devices away from our phone that have niche uses what's an older physical device though than a carpet one of the most

old physical devices of all time maybe a rock would you which was not comfortable to carpet which is very comfortable so that was like a big moment for humanity I wrap myself in rocks and let me tell you it it sucks Jarvis the rock sliced bread wasn't invented until 19

28. Not even 100 years ago? Pre-slice bread. Yeah, that makes sense. That just seems too late. To be the thing that everybody compares. Yeah, so that's the thing. So when people say it's the best thing since sliced bread,

they're not talking about the concept of taking a knife to a bunch of bread. But that just seems so true. Everyone just used to have a bread slicer. Also, pre-slice. So much was happening in 1920s. World's Fair? World's Fair. Great Depression.

Post-World War I. Prohibition. Prohibition. going into the Great Depression. The Great Depression is what I call when someone steps on me in a carpet. It's like the little hole that gets left is a great depression.

Wow. What more does she say about him? What does she say? I feel like that should be like disclosed between all parties instead of, you know, having to have to talk about it. She's not wrong. It's just funny to like

wokicize the guy who's in a carpet in New York City. Like all, everything she's saying is correct. Yeah, it is. Honestly, so terrible. Terrifying. It's a little Am I crazy for thinking That this is it like an art thing or like No, they just like to be in carpets

And not tell people about it Okay Is it like an art thing or That is a very New Yorker like response Yeah Is this being filmed? Yeah So Kevin Carpet doesn't have his own content so it's not for content

He's in it for the love of the game Yeah, it's art in its purest form Yeah. So that's the TikTok that I saw. Okay. And I was like, what is this about? Is this? Okay.

So apparently, this is the earliest known mention of Carpet Man. Now he's like a superhero. This is, 2009. This is, in the New York Times article, 2009. That's before Peeps was born. I don't think it is. No, we keep finding new and new. 2023, that's before Peep was born.

Yeah. And I'm just going to read. read the first like paragraph or two a man walks into a bar he's carrying a carpet under his arms he wraps himself in the carpet lies on the floor covers his face and waits for people to step on him a sign taped to the bar reads step on carpet people step on the carpet dozens in fact the more people who step on the carpet particularly if they're a woman in heels the happier the man is oh some are timid some are audacious some dance on the man some step on him while ordering their drinks completely unaware that a live body is underfoot.

No pun intended. Which is like, how do you not realize? I don't know. Some just stand there frozen looking totally freaked out. Okay, can we pause? How is this in the news? Back in 2009. Like, we had other shit.

There's like a housing crisis happening. Well, this is from New York Times. So maybe they're just being like, hey. Oh, it's the New York Times inside of CNBC. Yeah, I don't really understand it. Okay. It's under companies. So that's weird

Yeah So that was his thing He would just go to a bar Ask people to step on him for four hours And then he would leave Yeah And I guess go home and jork it or something I don't know

Like that's my question is Is it a Is it a sexual thing? It has to be right? I think that's what people are kind of Okay Trying to figure out too And then so that's the first like published

Mentioned up a carpet guy I'm floored to find out it was in 2009 That is so far back So that woman was right People aren't stepping on him very hard then if he's been able to do it for so long. 16 years? What if he has like a really like stiff back

and it's like a nice like therapeutic? Like getting someone to like squeeze you really. Yeah. Yeah, my dad used to make me walk on his back. Yeah. Yeah. Also. Then I got too big.

He said stop. Get off me. He said stop. You're hurting me. You still try to do it to the same. Yeah. Um, there is something about like being squished. Like weighted blankets.

Like squeeze machines that people have Where it's like On the ground in New York Yeah Being wrapped up in a carpet Sounds kind of cozy I don't want it to seem like I'm on his side Because what he's doing is clearly weird

Yeah But it does sound kind of fun Because a carpet's insulating Like if it's a stiletto heel Yeah You know the the tent The carpet's like It's not going to poke all the way through

It's like a form of armor but it's just like an isolated push right let's look at his first internet mention yeah 2009 first known publication the first known mention of him on the internet is from 2019 it was someone who

posted some photos that were taken of this guy and he would set up shop right under the bar where people had to stand and order drinks Yes. That's what that's really funny. Yeah. So here he's revealing a arm. So that's interesting.

Yeah. And so apparently he became kind of like known around New York City clubs. It was like, oh yeah, that's just the guy who does that. Wait. Wait, there's two of them. Giorgio and Kevin, the human carpet. Well, here's the thing. What?

Now there's like. There's only one. There's an army of multiple carpet people. only Kevin because there might be a copycat oh there's also this cut article where they have a few photos is that him that can't be he's not in a carpet it's like a tarpet I know maybe he forgot that's like a fire blanket yeah this is a moving blanket maybe that's a recreater I don't know but here's yeah they like basically interviewed him and followed him around for a night whoa so we've heard what his deal is he's a trust fund baby yeah

This story keeps on gimmings. So people did some digging about him. He's a trust fund baby. He was a model and now he just does this because he doesn't have to work, I guess. Yeah, but you don't have to do this. Right, right, right, right. He's got the time to do it. So it's like, you might as well.

I mean, some of us just play like Final Fantasy. We all would do it. Exactly. Yeah, it's just not enough hours in the day. There's a part of that article I want to read if you can go back because it says, according to Kevin, he's a trust fund baby who spent his turn. childhood between California and New York. He declined to share his age or last name publicly.

We know it's carpet. He was also a child model, and to prove it, he shows me old magazine advertisements featured a freckled, red-headed boy straight out of a Norman Rockwell painting. Based on the gentle eyes, I believe it's him. Yeah. He says the residuals from his modeling gigs plus his father's salary as an exec at universal features. Pictures, yeah.

Jesus Christ. Oh, my God. Universal pictures have allowed him to forego. a full-time job for life. I think it's more the universal pictures part. The residuals from like a photo that was taken of him as a child. How much money is he still getting from that? That's, you know, versus the CEO's salary.

Yeah. That's so funny. Yeah, between like my dad being Elon and my brief stint as a barista. Jacob, did that article say anything about jorking it? Yeah. Does this say anything about sexual? Girl F. jorking. Maybe sex.

Kink. Oh. Not some kink. What? Not some kink. This is not a fetish for me. I don't get off on it. To put it on me, I don't do it to jerk off.

A couple of times these girls have said, do you get off? I said, no. They said, let's see. So they stood on my area and they were rubbing it back and forth. Nothing. It's not a foot thing either. Kevin says he hates feet. That's why I could never move to Florida.

They wear sandals all the time. In fact, he tells me he hasn't had sex in roughly 30 years and doesn't really care to. Quoting Woody Allen, wait! Don't knock masturbation at sex with someone you love. Oh, Jesus Christ. Don't quote Woody Allen, Kevin. Well, he hasn't checked the news because he's been under a carpet for 30 years.

What have you been living under a rock? No, a rug. No, better. More comfortable. He says it's a Zen-type state. I'm feeling the people, hearing what they're talking about. I'm looking down at everyone hanging out. I just phase out of being a person.

I mean, you're looking. I think you're looking at. Maybe he literally phases out, like his spirit leaves his body and he's looking above. Floating. Some people have been sitting up. Articles, people have been like noticing him in the...

Doing it in a bar is one thing, but doing it in a street where people have to walk and also this is a accessibility issue. Hey, this is my home base. I felt like somehow I was invading his privacy by seeing his... Or seeing him outside of the carpet. Outside of the carpet.

It's like, it doesn't feel right. Seeing a chicken without the feathers. Apparently there's been another one running around New York as well. I do love the like citizen journalist feel of some of these videos. Yeah. I've decided I can't let TikTok away without making sure that you guys know about New York City's carpet guy. Or guys, actually, because there are two of them. And apparently they hate each other.

I'm fairly certain this is Kevin Carpet, while this is Giorgio, the human carpet. The reason I can tell this is Georgio is because Georgia, the human carpet employs a telltale face flap, whereas Kevin Carpet does not. That's Kevin Carpet at the office. How does he breathe? Also Kevin Carpet at the office. And laying out. Is that the middle of a crosswalk? Yes.

That's crazy. I mean, I guess he's got a little boundary there, but it's crazy. So there's another one that we don't know. I don't know a lot about Giorgio, but he has a face. Flap. Yeah, so you'd think we'd know more about him. Yeah. But he is,

Giorgio is featured in this interview with Weiss, I think it was. What is going on? This is all been happening under our nose this whole time. Under our feet? Literally under our nose. Under our feet, I guess, yeah. Wait, are you guys checked under this carpet? No.

Yeah, there is a man under here. I hate to tell you. Owie. The footprints are inviting. with people to step on because this is Georgio between 200 and 300 a week which would be about 1,200 a month

See, that's what I'm confused about is This is like a Stefan sketch from Saturday Night Live It's like New York's hottest nightclub Yeah Has a carpet guy Georgio So I guess people have been Hiring him

For gigs I mean I kind of get it We've hired an Austin Powers That's true Impersonator If you could just hire a carpet guy for your party that doesn't seem like something we wouldn't do have you ever seen how to with john wilson yeah so i this feels like john wilson would have covered this at some point yeah it's like

it's like nathan philter put him up to this in 2009 and he's been out of it ever since yeah that's a good point it's such a like off shoot of an episode that's that starts with like like he had the one about i can't remember what was it with the chair the furniture coverings and it turns into the guy who like wants to like uncircumcise himself or something this is sort of like and then this guy yeah it's like a scaffolding episode it's like oh why is there so much scaffolding around new york city and then it turns into an episode about this group that meets up for um because they're all big fans of avatar and they like speak the that's awesome navvy language yeah that's so sick oh carpet shopping let's let's what's are expensive this was from uh i think the same interview

Carpet shopping at you. I love carpets. Okay, yeah, that makes a lot of sense. We never see his full face. Looking at all the different selections that there are different designs. I think carpets are beautiful. There are some very interesting carpets here. See, this is interesting too because Kevin doesn't, he's using like gross, like boring carpet.

Yeah, for sure. He doesn't care. I think Georgio cares a lot more about the carpet. Georgia is more of an artist. Yeah, I think there's a lot more vanity In what Giorgio does I gotta say I don't respect it as much as Kevin Kevin's just sort of a traditional old-fashioned

Carpet's getting stepped on guy Yeah The face flap is a dead giveaway Yeah, I know His ego is huge He's like he's got to get credit for it You know The reason the carpets are so expensive

Is that there's so much labor involved in their creation And I was gonna say 200 That's actually pretty good Well it's a small carpet Which is worth noting relatively small like i don't know why he's not on facebook marketplace buying carpets new to be stepped on

it is a vanity project brother what do you mean yeah three by five it's too small i need at least four by six maybe i'll take two i'll make two carpets out of this yeah yeah all right well he just has a pep in a step well yeah he's in his his favorite place the carpet store you think the employees there are probably like oh my god this guy yeah regular He's going to walk around and gently graze every carpet. You try to check out he's inside of the carpet. You're buying. There used to be a bush guy in Fisherman's Wharf in San Francisco.

Do you remember this guy? Not George Bush, but like a man inside of a bush. So he would hide. He created a suit, essentially, but with fake plants. And then he would hide behind actual bushes and jump out and scare people. So that sucks. But here's the thing about that, world famous Bushman, I'll tell you, let me tell you about a world famous Bushman back in my day. And he did 9-11. Well, not, you know, he's like, he didn't do it. He was there when it happened. But not there. He was actually reading the kids. But you know what I mean. But, okay, listen, the, the, if someone's in a suit with the, with like access to their body and their spooking people, I feel way more threatened by that. Then I know how consistent. restricting a carpet is and so I don't think that the carpet man can get me well and I hate being

scared like I hate when someone jumps out if I get jumps here to get angry immediately yeah I could just activate something you mean I just like he claims that he makes money off of doing that I don't understand how I wouldn't be like ah and then hand him $10 I would I feel like I would accidentally like flail and like hurt someone like I would like accidentally like push my hands like if if I was in danger because someone was like jumping out at me. Push him in the bay. Because there's like, what is that from where it's like a guy's in a trash can and then he like jumps out and then someone punches him and knocks him out?

Oh, there was one of those with someone that was like dressed as like a snowman. I think someone punched one of those guys before. I'm sure the world famous Bushman guy has been punched for sure. But he, if you try and take a photo of him or video, he does yell at you and say that you need to pay him. That's okay. Okay, I get his frustration, but he's in what? San Francisco? Yeah.

He's in public. Yeah. Does he have a license to do the busking where he is? Yeah. So it's like, I don't want to. Let's get this guy shut down. Also, world famous. I've never heard of him.

He doesn't always be the page. So what about scaring the public? Oh, scarring the public. Is that scary? Okay, okay. Scarring two hours, right? Okay. Maybe, I don't know.

Yeah, I'm a spelling B champion. This is just a funny little video of him in some people noticing him. Is there a woman there going, there's a man here. There's a man here. There's a man in that closet. We've not given our consent to step over it. Exactly. The crazy thing happened to make a little friend today.

Oh my God. That's my problem. Just the him billowing at the beginning. He's very funny. We have flopping around like a fish. I talked on top of Kevin's carpets. I had no idea who this human being was until today. and I felt so terrible after I stepped on this man

and it just heard me so much and then I found out who he was and everything's fine now. It's a person, though. What a story. I felt so bad for stabbing on him and then I found out and everything is fine now. And everything is fine now.

That's beautiful. Dude, someone running away from him is that such a valid response. For sure, I mean. That little girl in the beginning got so scared by him, which I would as well. Yeah.

You kind of got a, be on edge a little bit when you're walking around New York. Also, they have a stroller. It's like, that is so shitty to block Kevin doesn't know they have a stroller. He can't see anything. You can't see anything. You can't be mad at Kevin. He's just minding his own carpet business. He's blinded by his own situation.

I feel like he's got to have some abrasions on his skin from like the friction. Like, have you ever accidentally rubbed your body on a carpet? It doesn't feel good. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, that's Kevin Carpet. Damn. Man, I guess the moral

the story is don't leave your house don't go outside Kevin Carpets never going he can't come to my house it's funny because it's like it's so obvious what it is and everyone's jumping over it so they're like

it's New York so everybody's like I got to get to where I'm going I'm just going to hop over this carpet guy it's a Tuesday you know yeah so that's funny I guess just that it's not even the weirdest thing you see any day yeah he should do it in a small town where it's more novel

for something crazy to be happening. Gary, Indiana. Everyone would be like, this is awesome. This is the most interesting thing that's ever happened here. Yeah, I guess you did get a vice

documentary. Let's go jump on the carpet guy. Yeah. I do worry about young hooligans like bullying him and I guess that hasn't happened. Like stepping up and jumping up and down.

I mean, how could you bully him in a way that he doesn't like? I feel like he just invites every sort of the only way you bully him is by ignoring him, you know, that's the most hurtful thing for Kevin Carpet, but you walk over him? The saddest thing for a carpet man is to be ignored.

Yeah. Could someone like, the article said people were like dancing on him and so I'm like, can't you step on him so already, you seriously injure him? I feel like he could be harmed. Some sort of internal organ, damage. It's not like obsidian.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, but maybe he's okay with that too. He's like built like he's going to join the Avengers. They just like roll him out. Well, Jacob. Yeah. No, you're welcome.

You're a little freak. You're a little, how do you even? It's amazing that we took this back to 2009. Yeah, isn't that crazy? He's been doing this for so long, 16 years. And they hate each other looks, no offense, but he looks like an older man. He's getting up there who's been stepped on for years. Yeah.

That's my fear. Georgia, take care of yourself and also get consent where applicable, of course. Speaking of jobs. Wow. You're so good at this. Steve Jobs. That's what we're talking about, the iPod. Speaking of jobs as being stepped on while at work.

You know where else you can step into a beautiful new home? I just got to see this guy. Yeah, so this guy's name is Kyle Huckabee. Kyle Huckabee, X. That's such a callback to the old times. Oh, yeah. Wait, why? Because that's when our old AIM usernames,

my username on YouTube is V-Sempathy V. because that was my Rinscape, that was my RuneScape Pure Name. I was a Soul Wars product, as they used to call me, 40 attack, 99th strength, one defense. My PK video was set to ludicrous slap. I was talking about feeling like slapping somebody today, and it's me just freaking R2H-K owing people. I'm so strong.

One of my old RuneScape videos was set to a lost profits song, and I'm not going to get into the specifics of the crime, that the singer of lost profits committed because it's one of the most heinous things you'll ever hear but um so that's the music I grew up listening too oh no yeah it's really I'm not even okay sorry for him bring

bring that up I just you mentioned that and I and I that haunts me the one of the saddest things I did was taking like I didn't just take down my rinscape videos off my channel I um deleted them from the back end of YouTube you can't even watch them anymore I think I have them on a hard drive somewhere but it's a

it's guy never gonna find them I'm never going to find it. All right. What's the deal with the emo realtor? Yeah, I think he operates out of Portland. Of course. It's a great place to operate as an email realtor. Most of his videos are normal, but then every once in a while, his kind of schick is that he's emo and writes a song about a house.

And it's kind of fun. Okay. Wait. I'm kind of in. So here's a song about a listing that he made that went viral. There's a house down in Vancouver My place I want to show It's one of a Kanye special

The way that Vancouver was so good Wow There's a house down in Vancouver Oh man You're ready to start over Yeah, it's pretty good right Like he's great I'm expecting the production

It'd be so good Yeah Oh my God down in Vancouver A place I want to show It's one of a con yet It's special Looks like the y'all are mine

This is a good This is a good dating a solid song It's a green And both bedrooms wrap you up In comfort A peaceful cozy scene It's a nice house It's a nice house

Looks like the Alamo? Yeah Yeah Remember that? A lot of people forget This house isn't just walls It's a place to call home That's beautiful

This house isn't just walls Oh my other dogs Oh my mom You're too dead Wow. I mean, you know, more work went into that than I think what realtors usually do. Wait, I kind of want to cut directly from that day and be like, hey guys, it's Kevin here. I'm in this nice, beautiful home, like just doing a normal.

And then I want to go back to the songs because they're so good. For those of you who don't know, this is called a rummer. I know the first thing I'd be thinking is to fill that. It was boring. video i've watched my day of life like this house is objectively nicer but i don't want to buy it as much yeah i can i can we hear another song yeah so yeah this guy so now that's so how did he even did good for him i think he just followed his dreams yeah i yeah maybe he's just a big emo fan but i just feel like you're doing your other videos a disservice because that

video was god awful and i just want more of the emo song videos yeah i'm like is he is he singing and producing these because i think he is i'm i think it's genuinely impressive yeah yeah yeah i feel like uh the past couple years there's been a lot of um do you have any like uh friends from school or that you just kind of have continued to follow who have become realtors yeah i have a couple and um i no hate but it's like the most boring content that anyone can make this to just randomly see like oh it's four four and a thousand dollars uh you know it's but so it's got a door yeah that's great man i hope someone buys it and then you get 10% for some reason there's a carpet around it yeah there's a man could be a guy there's a guy who knows

but i there's i i do like the videos i've seen of people transcending what is normally a very boring genre and they'll or they'll do the thing where they like sprint through the house there's one i don't know that's kind of fun this is the garage yeah they're like yelling the whole time it's fun you know it's like it i guess you got to do that to get attention online you know it is like kind of an anti it kind of reminds me of um look i don't know the history of realty but it does kind of feel like car sales where it's like it's a certain way because it's like goes back a long time yeah and you know people got to work uh and yeah it's fun i'm having fun so i used to work for a realtor i remember yeah so when when i convinced antistasia to

quit her realtor job to come work at Sad Boys Incorporated. And you regret it every day? Yeah, every single day. It's actually the best, so Jarvis. I said, it looks like the L.M.O. Jarvis came down to Los Angeles from San Francisco. We were having dinner and he seemed very nervous almost and was like, would you quit your job? I was like, so I bought this carpet.

Would you quit your job and work full time for me? And I was like, fuck yeah, let's go. I'm like because I hated working at that real estate job that is a industry that attracts the worst people possible my boss was very nice I loved her you were kind of like my guide to the city though because I'd be like I'm looking for a place in Silver Lake and then you'd send me a little song that you sang while you were going through the different apartments of Silver Lake I did have access to all these databases so it's like yeah you help me out a ton here's all these places but yeah I I just think it is a very fucked up industry and I think it does need to change because it is so like old fashion and like it creates this situation where people are actually actively lying to you and doing shitty things in order to make money. Yeah. And like my again, my boss was great.

I loved her. But there were other people that worked there that I heard them say awful things about about renters about their own clients. And it was like, it was kind of like that show selling sunset because everyone also had a ton of plastic surgery and was like way too buff for just a normal dude. Yeah.

Well, no wonder this guy's so angsty. He's just built up so much frustration for the industry he works in. That's why it sounds so like pure. It comes from a real place. He's so fed up of the way that realty has, Ben historically and he doesn't want to do it. He wants to disrupt the system, dude. Yeah, and I can't blame him for that.

He's waging against the paperware. Panic at the escrow. That's kind of funny. It's a very funny niche where like there's a limit of puns and jokes you could make. And he's got to kind of hit all of them because there's only seven. There's five. Oh, I was going to say, remember my old landlord who like was doing all kinds of skeezy shit with my old place so and we like uncovered all of these insane things about my old place that i was staying at

and now the guy was like being dishonest about like the financial standing that he was in and that has a good example of like how real estate as a business is actually really fucked up because he was kind of a flipper he would like buy properties and like he was like benson boom yeah yeah oh man all right let's watch this little video Oh, and you are too I thought it's in my head Why? Because you missed another Offmarket cabin

You still have time I had the key before the sign went up This is so Oh my god This only has 2,000 lights It's crazy Oh my God I love it

Don't have won He's not like a little bit of a little bit of Before another flat will grow I'll out with you Okay so here's my other question He's nailing the genre I mean it's not just like It's not just like a little bit of like pop punk

Like he's doing the full He's doing it So it kind of makes me think What if he used to be in bands That's gotta be Yeah I wonder if he does He is of that age where it's like If you told me this is the singer from like

Broadway, that old band or like of Mice and Man. Yeah, no, 100%. It's like the main or whatever, yeah. Like, I would 100% buy that and it is the thing where... This cabin? Well, you should. I had the key before

the sign went up. Oh, man. You know, when you're young and you tell your parents you want to be a musician and they're like, yeah, it's not really, it's kind of a pipe dream. You should have like a real job and it's like... And you said real job? Real estate. Real estate? Okay. Okay, I will combine my love for music with my passion for getting 3% of a home purchase.

There is a brief window in time when I was making like computer science related commentary videos. And this is almost like that. It's like I'm combining two things. The thing that gets me about this though is that it's also legit funny. Like he's kind of nailing the punchlines of these. It seems like he has to be. Yeah. And I want to be laughing with him because I'm like,

this is so good. And it hits that, like, it's, like, very hard to do parody music because you have to be so good at the music part. Yeah. And he's, like, nailing that. And you know, it kind of reminds me, did you ever watch that show Metalocalypse? Oh, yeah. So, like, Brennan small.

It scared me. I didn't watch that much of it. Brendan Small, though, because he did home movies. He did home movies. And I watched that. So, and he's, he's a TV writer and showrunner. And he was always in metal when he was younger. And he's, like, very good at good.

guitar and he created this show Metal Acolyps for Adult Swim. It's a funny show and it kind of makes fun of metal types of, like different types of metal bands and musicians. Iron, steel, various types of metal. And the, um, the music in the show is like legit, very good. Yeah. But it's also very funny. That's how I felt like he's into comedy, you know.

Yeah. Tenacious D is the same. way where it's like, oh, this is actually technically very impressive. But then, and so now Brennan Small, he's living the dream because he'll actually tour with Metallocalypse. Oh, that's cool. Yeah. You know what's funny about Brennan Small is that he named the main character in home movies

after himself, and that's the only reason I know his name. Oh, yeah. Because maybe it's Brendan Small's, but I think it's just Brendan Small. Yeah, the little kid is the little kid, yeah. Yeah, that show is so good. if you if uh john h benjamin as coach mcgirk so good they did a whole it's john benjamin yes sorry they did a whole episode about um kofka they made a rock opera for kofka a rock cough a rock koffa i have a cave before okay let's listen to this more this is awesome i'll show you cabins that don't feel real

like heartbreak You can't unfill Now he's like All right There's not even lyrics I'm just gonna rock out Yeah I like when he just gets emo He's screaming

He's punching stuff Looking in the mirror I do think which is like This song had like four distinct sections to it Where it wasn't just like the same And also like I had the key Before the sign went up

Goes so hard I'm sorry it's just very good Very good. There's so many talented musicians in the world that just never make it. Yeah. Yeah. They're just the best guitar player you've ever heard, and their band never took off. And so now they're an emo realtor, you know.

Yeah. But I love it. Good for him. What is the one that's there? I'm just not to extend this anymore. What was the things millennial buyers like just for me? Rainy Day real estate. Come on, man.

So, fun, man. Come on, man. You know, buyers like black accents, plants. They won't keep alive. That one wall with. wood slats, a kitchen island where their dreams collapse of a lot room they'll never use

a deep top just to scroll and snows open shelves for stage books a coffee bar for emotional crutches and looks but what they really want is not trade your soul for 20% down to not get out bit by a cash only clown to cry in a wow it's so niche about home purchases

Yeah, I feel like he's really tapping into some frustrations people have about the housing market, though. Like, he's like so many realtors, you kind of feel like they feel above you. But this guy's like on our side. Like he's frustrated too about these cash only buy. A cash offer, dude. They don't even live in the state. They own 50 properties already. They're just going to flip this.

They're going to turn it in an Airbnb. But like I feel you guys, the first home buyer is like, it's hard out there for you guys. It really is. I wish I could buy house from him, but I don't want to. I just don't want any If I was in a market for a cabin in Portland If I had any reason to get an off market cabin Because they go quick

Stopping me from doing it Wow, what a great time I'm so glad we ended with this Because this is just elevated my mood Yeah, yeah So everyone, everyone go check out Kyle Huckety That's so sick Oh man

well also random recommendation on the topic of like music uh mixing with other genres i just saw a show recently don't stop or all jazz it's the guys from two tree hill on like youtube and tick and then a couple of their people they did this they did they do this in new york mostly but they did this out here at dynasty where they have like a full jazz band playing while standups perform and it's sort of like there's this kind of give and take with it where they're just trying to They're just kind of improvising music to, like, the flow of the sets, and it was really fun. And then they had some really funny songs in between. Oh, that's awesome.

You guys should, it's a hilarious show. Shout out to Anastasia used to host a variety show in San Francisco that no one can see anymore because she lives in LA now called The Warm Road Variety Hour, and it was a mix of comedians, improv, and local bands. Yeah, it was really fun. And there is no evidence of it because we tried so many times to work. record that show to like send it to festivals and stuff and every single recording either like got lost or had some technical glitch or something it was cursed there's some filmed old improv set of ours yeah and i can't watch that shit it's like oh man it's like looking back at like a dream

you did improv right yeah yeah then there is also a couple oh i think my level one showcase or whatever uh is on youtube somewhere and i don't have access to the account that I uploaded it on. So it's just, I hope people don't find that. Why am I bringing attention to it? I don't think there's any SEO that can find it. I think it was like, you would have to know the name of it. You'd never find it.

And even if you did, it was 10 years ago, whatever. But I don't think anyone can find our old stuff because it's not any of our accounts. Yeah. You know, there'll be YouTube channels that are like, here's all the Easterags you missed in this movie or this TV show. So there's this channel, New Rock Stars, that does that a lot. And, Anastasia, do you remember what show it was? it was something ever after No no no I think it was the

Agatha all along Ever after all along in my head Same thing Agatha all along I don't know why They're randomly talking about improv They put up a photo of improv It's like stock photo and it's me

Doing improv And it is they must have just Googled improv Yeah they don't mention that it's It is a photo that was like The San Francisco Chronicle or something came When we were doing like Your fucked up relationship or something like that and it's just a photo of me like on a chair doing like improv face you know

yeah it's so fucking weird it was just like such a bizarre thing because and it's like my friend saw you at this video and i was like normally that's like oh it's related to youtube and no it's this old photo in like 2014 that's wow that's crazy yeah well then drew what a what a grand old time we had yeah you know i don't think you you really meant that. No. Okay. Not at all, man.

Oh, man. I mean, I was having a great time and then the emo realtor made me so upset. I feel like I have a lot of emotional. Yeah, I just have a lot of emotions I need to tap into. Maybe you should get, wrap yourself in a carpet when you get home. Oh, well, yeah, probably. I was going to do that anyway. Yeah.

I am going to blast some emo music in my car now. Yeah, dude, it does like kind of put you in the mood. God. I just found out this. Absolutely. I really thought I would grow out of music like that. But I legitimately, that sounds like a lot of music. I currently listen to

I listen to a lot of like pop punk from like early 2000s That was my gateway into more like Screamo and heavier stuff But I'm like I enjoy it It's just like I think I never got Into a band enough Because it's just like whatever I was into

I was like really into that band But there's this band That broke up a million years ago That like never really took off They had one big album or big album In the scene I guess Yeah, it was called The Cab, and they were like, it was almost like in sync with guitars because they do a lot of like, they were signed to Fuel by Rahm and they were discovered

by one of the Panic of the Disco people. What was their big song? It was one of those nights is one of the songs. And then Bounce was in rock band. I remember Bounce. Yeah, yeah. And they just announced that they are reuniting for when we were Youngfest this year. And so I have to go.

Yeah. The last time I saw them, I saw them at 1982, the bar in Gainesville, Florida, where I had to, because all the bars in Gainesville were 18 and up because of U.F. Yeah, I remember this album art. Yeah, that album rips to me. It's so weird, because I feel like, for the most part, I still listen to a lot of the music. I used to listen to a long time ago, but every once in a while, I'll hear a song I legitimately have not heard in like 15 years. And what it does to my brain is crazy. there's this um this happened the other day this random ass british band called like working for a nuclear

free city and i was watching an instagram reel and someone used a song that i hadn't heard since like 2012 i listened to a bunch and then i went back and it was just like it took me back it's crazy i had that with the band no use for a name oh i remember them do you remember them they're like a pop punk band right but they're older yeah they're my friend early 90s my friend peter martin turned me on to them he burned he burned me a cd called the 90s were weird times I think it's like nostalgia has diminishing return so if there's a band you like when you were younger

but you've continued to listen them throughout your life it doesn't instantly take you back there because you have so many memories associated but when you legitimately haven't heard something since like half your life ago it's like whoa this is crazy to me

I'm still a big paramour fan but I've been a paramour fan since their first album and so their sound has changed so much that if I go back to their earlier records then I do still get transported because it's such a different sound. Yeah.

And I can like... I love their newest album. Yeah, dude. Some of their best work. That whole album is great. Haley's the best, man. Crave's such a good song. Oh, man.

Yeah. I gotta go see them. I haven't seen them since like 2013. Yeah, I saw them. She's so, she's so fun to watch. It's crazy. Yeah. We saw her at Amway where the magic play,

but we were so far away. It's like, you know... My favorite concert that I went to recently, though, was I saw Fawabwe at the Honda Center. Mm-hmm. That's a place, right? Fonda Center. They play, like, hockey there.

Where? Here? In Irvine. Kia. Kia Center. Kia Center. Kia Forum. Where's the Honda Center?

That's an NBA place. No, what's the fuck? Did I just make that up? Are you thinking of, um... Was it like a Honda dealership? Honda Center is an indoor arena located in Anaheim, California. Okay, then I did. Um, but anyway, uh, and it was like they, I was expecting, I, like, listened to their new album,

which I really liked. and I was expecting it to be because it was the tour for their new album, but then they played a bunch of old songs, and I lost my mind. And they brought out fucking, they brought out William Beckett from The Academy Is. Oh shit. And the last time I saw William Beckett was singer. Yeah, he's like six three. Is he still have a really long hair?

I think so. And he, oh no, they didn't bring out William Beckett. William Beckett, I saw with the cab at 1982 back when I was like 18 years old, but who I saw, they brought out fucking, oh my God. Come on, just say it, man. Say it. Oh, my God. It was Gabe, uh, Gabe supporter from Cobra Starship. Okay.

And I was like, yo. Did they sing a Cobra Starship? Yo, uh, they. Why are all these guys like also models? I was going to say they do kind of look. Look, I, maybe I had crushes on all of them also. Dude, they're all the, all the, all the, all the, all the male. singers that I liked

I've had some sort of attraction to in a like I want to be you kind of way you know ma'am the emo I do have to say the emo genre is a little plagued with bad people

oh for sure in fact I don't even know that some of the people I've mentioned have not done bad things because I don't because it's like it's a lot of I know he'll especially right and she never can she never can Yeah, I think they were probably, like, the last generation of, like, rock dudes. Boys will be boys. Yeah, where people were, like, looking the other way.

And boy is a good term, because I feel like it felt very, like, boy. It's like you're 35, but, like, the, you know. It's so interesting how many of those emo bands we grew up listening to are, like, just as popular now, if not more pop. Like, they've had such a resurgence. Yeah. And all they had to do was go away for a bit. There's some bands that, like, because they broke up for so long, they're, this mystique about them coming back.

I think about that with the Jonas Brothers. If they had continued to just sort of like, we would have been like, okay, guys, stop, that's enough. But then it was such a big deal when they came back. I went to a Jonas Brothers concert last year because Brighen, our friend invited, like, I don't know how this happened, but he was like, I have like second row tickets

to this Jonas Brothers concert and they're doing like all of their albums. And I was like, I'm in because I really loved, I was like a radio Disney kid. Oh, man. And so I was, I was into those first Jonas Brothers albums. They were legitimately good. I really, and it was kind of within the genre of music that I liked.

It was a little, you know, pop funky. Yeah, it was a little pop funky. Yeah. Had the, uh, good night and goodbye. That was my favorite song back in the day. Uh, and they played that. And I was like, they still got it, bro. Yeah. But it just goes to show, I think sometimes it's better to disappear for a bit

and then make people want you and you come back. However, Joe Jonas did say some weird shit. Because I think he just like got, there was some weird stuff between him and Sophie Turner. they were like ending their relationship and he like on stage is like whatever you hear about me in the press like it didn't happen unless you hear it from my fucking mouth there's it was like very like that vibe of like all right it's not 2008 we can like you didn't even need to say anything take this guy's microphone away yeah yeah and i was like hey he's been he's become a better singer over time too so good for him it just goes to show practice

practice practice practice practice practice practice practice and no matter what it is Take it one more time, practice, practice, practice, practice. Oh, for three. Okay. You got to keep practicing. We're ending the show. You're going to work on that.

Drew, thanks for joining us. Is there anything you want to promote? No. Okay. If you enjoyed this, you can head on over to patreon.com slash sadboys where you can watch our Patreon exclusive episode of Sad Boys nights. Drew joins us, and we talk about a bunch of stuff. I don't even remember what we talk about.

Yeah, because it was so crazy all the things we're talking about. Whoa. Oh, we talked about AI. We did a lot of AI rants. Yeah. Most about how we love it and how it's so sick. Yeah, how it's like changing the world in such a fun, exciting way. It's only the best ways.

It's kind of like wrapping your computer in a big carpet and stepping on it. Yeah, AI does make me want to step on my computer. Yeah. So we do that on the show. Yeah. So check it out. All right. We end every episode of Sad Boys with a particular phrase.

We love you. And we're sorry. Boom. The greatest invention the world's ever seen is going to change. everything everything's AI now everything's computer and it's just I don't know it's but it's all bullshit it's just I don't know personally I'm glad that everything's computer because I get to watch B-ball explaining Jacob let's let's let's this is they're generating an impressive amount of money off of actually not being a real person go gochy girl how you doing how you're moving

girl moving girl how she's delicate that future girl future girl yeah we are now take my money go away oh you want it girl too rich for me