Sad Boyz - The Real Reason James Corden Got Canceled

Episode Date: May 19, 2023

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Welcome to Sad Boys, a podcast about feelings and other things also. I'm Jarvis. I'm Jordan. And today we are coming to you with a podcast, just like normal. I've invited myself doing this whenever you're saying the intro. Yeah. And it's because I, you know how like people that aren't on camera much, like what do we do with my hands? Right.

I don't know what to do with my head. Like, because if we're filming a video or something, or even like in the conversation now there's like dynamism, right? Like human etc sitting for the intro because that's that's the activation right yeah i'm like i'm not activated yet it's almost like an audience member like we gotta have a you do the intro i think we did that a few times back in the day i crushed it and it's always like really fun i still it's like a 75 percent i get it i'm not gonna force you to do it today i uh i know the rhythm practice your homework i know the syllables your homework do your homework practice your homework don't give it in you know it's like

uh i just love rhythmic intros um like i feel like i could just like knock out a sub you beautiful bastards hope you're having a fantastic Tuesday. I'm Philip DeFranco. You've just been filled in. I love your faces and I'll see you tomorrow. That was, that's the whole Philip DeFranco intro and outro. Yeah. Or the, uh, and let's just jump into it.

Of course. Yeah. Um, did you love it? Did you hate it? What did you rate it? Give it a like, if you like, uh, something, please don't cry. Is there another, can you think of another podcast that does that? Like in our kind of space, our age ish um i used to i think in a very very

old video of mine i did a few intros um well the old this just happened to come up during a video that i did with danny um um on my main channel but we we were talking about j old jake paul vlogs and the jake paul vlogs are so funny because they just they they intro with a gunshot sound and then jake paul going hey really yeah let me play this um dude modern jake paul that feels like a mandela effect thing where i yeah i feel like I could talk to someone That like, the boxer? The boxer, yeah No, no, he used to be like a different kind of annoying

Oh, like a very bad guy Like a louder annoying That's right Huh? Huh? Huh? What? I just huh what i just um uh we had we had a friend around the other day and uh they were showing us they were i think they were going to do a stream where they watched every single couple karaoke back to back and then you got like 10 gifts up you have to rewind five minutes or something

and i've never actually sat down and watched one i've seen like a clip or like some kind of you know capital d discourse making fun of it something right but thankfully the you know the era of james is coming to a close yeah i wanted to celebrate by watching a little bit of it yeah he was murdered in cold blood the show was not not him. Yeah, he killed it. Yeah. It's so long. Carpool karaoke. Yeah. It's so, carpool karaoke is so long

for what the bit is. Yeah. This was like a 15, like 10 to 15 minute him and me goes, maybe it's extended when it's online. They don't get it.

Like they are not on board and they didn't, then take him to like their store and they dress him up. They go somewhere? Yeah. And they get out several times it's really strange what yeah i guess i've only maybe i skipped those parts because there's a few that i've watched because i'm there are some people who are like really good live singers like adele and like usher and people like that and i and even like bruno mars i think i was curious like

what his carpool karaoke was going to sound like and so i i think i may have just like watched them and like tapped through and maybe only listened to the the karaoke parts yeah so in my mind it's just like an eight minute video of them doing karaoke in a car but maybe there's like there's more beats to it they i feel like they yeah they'll sometimes go i mean sometimes i'll just go through a drive-through but to get out of the car and stop singing to me it's like so that you're just hanging out yeah yeah have you seen the um the get up of how they record them i think that sometimes they drive or maybe most of the time james corden is actually driving but there was a thing that went viral a while back where they weren't actually

driving the car it was on like a oh it's like a film production like a film production yeah apparently he like addressed the controversy in a video and he was like I wasn't feeling good that day yeah maybe we can watch that I was drunk

who cares man for real thanks for being here tonight now i have to talk to you about something i'm sure many of you have heard uh i've recently been the victim of a scandal there's been some very very serious allegations made against me let Let's get going, James. Yeah. Come on, mate. I get it. Six minutes 30 for this. I know. I don't think that in this climate playing with the...

I actually... Playing with their serious allegations against me thing is tasteful. I did do this once for a YouTube short. I titled it like addressing the allegations um and it was about uh me not being jake from state farm or something like that sure um and i don't i was like desperate to try to get a short to like do something and i don't i don't like that i did that i yeah it's also but like a case of platform and pace where like this is so long that this bit is going and the joke i mean the joke is yeah i've been accused of abuse that's

like right joke he's doing but but actually don't worry guys wouldn't that be funny wouldn't that be crazy also it's a climate where like his contemporaries have had controversies. Don't worry. You know what I mean? Me and Ellen. Psych, I'm normal. I'm not like Ellen. Yeah. So I think if any of my contemporaries in the space had had controversies about this,

I probably wouldn't have made a joke. Yeah, especially not like within the last six months. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's worth it. But again, I think it was like a cheap joke for a YouTube short that I did. This is six minutes and 30 seconds. And address those rumors and assure you, my audience,

that these accusations are not true. Okay. I am, of course, talking. Let's get it moving, James. Yeah. Come on, mate. I am, of course, talking about the people saying that I don't drive the car during carpool car rides.

Of course. Big sign. Applaud. It's lighting up. The gun turrets are lighting up. Yeah, the turrets point to the audience and they cock. Yeah, everyone's got like a laser on their forehead.

200 times. I haven't talked about this on the podcast, but I have been to a live filming of one of these shows. Not to James Corden. Oh, really? But I went to a live taping of Lilly Singh's show. Oh. What's the most diplomatic response?

Well, yeah. I would say I think we should be absolutely diplomatic here. Just because, you know, I have friends and stuff who work on the show or who work with the talent and stuff like that. So I don't want to disrespect anybody. No, the only thought I had is that I have no opinion at all. Well, I will tell you something uh i sat near the fucking front row like side front row area and i was the splash zone because i at the time my management we like kind of like we're like management siblings like her manager and my manager knew each other or worked with each other at the time. And so I got put in the VIP section or something like that.

And that was a mistake. I was like, I agreed to do it because I was like, this will be a fun experience. I went with Jessicaessica crab um and it was well one the warm-up comic god this was so embarrassing oh wait this part sounds familiarish yeah it was like four years ago it was a while ago it must have been a long time ago because it right yeah pre-covid so the um the warm-up comic was like making jokes towards me and i can't i was like trying to go along with it i'm just trying to be a good audience member you know what i mean and what you're like the joke surrogate like eye contact like am i right sir whatever yeah this guy gets it right it was something like that and uh i don't know how this came up and he was like what do you do and i in that moment was like i want to lie i want to say i'm like a software engineer or whatever and i was like i do youtube and then he was like wait should i know who you are

does anybody in the audience know who this guy is and then in that moment i was like i want to leave this earth like please take me to mars this can't be televised yeah this bit is for no thankfully it wasn't televised because this is just the warm-up for the show for the uh thing like um but still like such a strange approach it was bad and then i had to listen as like the crowd of people decide if they know who i am or not i was like this is humiliating this is going through tsa yeah i was like i was like i get it dude but chill out like if no matter what the answer is it's not going to get a laugh no it's not comedy you're not the audience warm

and so i just listened to just like it's the most humbling experience ever because i was already on the fence about being there and then and then it's just a bunch of people go do you know who this guy is and then a bunch of people are like uh and, and somebody was like, yeah, I mean, there's a universe where anybody enthusiastically is like, yeah, now target me. Right. Exactly.

Cause you're almost asking. Yeah. You're almost asking to invite further conversation. Anybody else want to be yelled at? And I was like, Oh no, no, I'll die.

You know, you could just, you know, whip out a gun and shoot me on the spot. Like, please end this, whatever you want. I'll head.

Yeah. Yeah. Go ahead. I'll just sit on stage but that episode of lily singh was so um nerve-wracking for me being in that audience because beforehand they give you a they give you a like a talking to where they're like all right so the lily's about to come out and this could be james this could be anybody and these are just people doing their jobs but this is how this thing works i want to instill it so that's

not a thing on this happens with all these shows they're like lily's about to come out and we want to see you guys smiling we want to see you guys clapping we want to see you guys having a good time and the cameras are going to be on you and i'm like oh no so the whole time they're giving that special emphasis to the front row or yeah they're like you're in the splash zone oh you're in the exit row on the plane yeah yeah yeah we're gonna oh yeah exactly you're the extra other thing um you're actually seated in the front so we're gonna in the event of a joke we're gonna need you to laugh please chuckle yeah yeah these are the exits right here and it cuts off right here so your face is gonna be in front of a hundred thousand people i just want to check would you be willing to go for if something yeah could you if the plane went down

yeah if the plane goes down could you give a yuck yuck yeah could you pop off could you pop off a little bit could you make a meme about yourself where people are like this guy's loving these jokes yeah so does anybody anybody here know who this is we've got that bit prepared as well no Could you make a meme about yourself where people are like, this guy's loving these jokes. Yeah. So does anybody here know who this is? We've got that bit prepared as well. No, no, not again. The voices. So the whole time, I'm just like, oh my God. My face, the fucking muscles in my face were sore from all the like smiling and laughing at literally

everything that was happening because i felt like i had a gun to my head and i had to or else well it's weird when you see that one shot in a special where maybe in the edit they didn't spot that someone like far on the left was sour as you know it's gonna go viral oh yeah it's gonna be like uh did anybody notice jarvis johnson not having a good time in the audience last night well tom hanks did not like this gervais joke at the golden globe yeah and then it's okay and he's like dissociating about you know something completely unrelated from an hour earlier yeah he stubbed his toes whatever yeah and so that was what i wanted to avoid and it's why uh it was a painful experience

dude that straddling that line especially in like public spaces where there's you know a hundred people that could be being recorded i felt like there's actually a little bit of creative clash at the end oh yeah because there were people drifting around recording some rigs and stuff and every now and then i'm like okay how much how much do I, am I going to get? Wow, Jordan's pretty drunk looking in this photo. Or Jordan looks kind of bored. And then when it happens, when there's like even one tweet, like those are the shoes he's wearing?

It's like, yeah, they're orthopedic. My body is broken. I'm sorry. Well, that's a boring reply. Yeah, that happened at the last Creator Clash where it's like, look at Drew and Jarvis' face during the national anthem. Patriots?

Yeah. Yes. That's a funny idea to criticize. That's such a weird... These guys are not having a good time. Well, not my president's friends. So, let's continue with james now i really hate that i'm about to say this right but fake news okay now what's the date on this yeah hold

on wow three years ago very fucking timely 25 million views three years, wait. Three years ago, Trump was out of office. What was the date? I think if I roll over it. January 2020. That is the inauguration day. That is so funny. Or is it the year before? Oh, it is the year before.

Those COVID years. Those clans in Congress. COVID years. Yeah, you caught up to speed. A few days ago, somebody tweeted this video oh my god it's the Biebs The Biebs Who was that? Justin Bieber Trevor Noah James Gandolfini

What year is this? Hey I'm in trouble I'm not driving a car I don't do a James Bond video I'm not driving a car Dean's enjoying this one Forgot that We did a stream for Curtis' birthday I don't know. I've unlocked something. Dean's enjoying this one. Oh, yeah. Forgot that we did a stream for Curtis's birthday where we were opening Pokemon cards,

and Jordan and Dean are in the background talking about the Godfather. I don't know. Talking about the Sopranos. The Sopranos, yeah. Very cautiously discussing that. I didn't want it to be, you know, too loud or get in the way, but neither of us knew the other person also loved the soprano

so it was just very adorable holy shit we should have done a stream where we open up sopranos episodes oh yeah just one by one go oh this is the one where james gandolfini is in it yeah yeah all right good cool probably a good one i know this looks bad he's really slow rolling this crazy and it has caused uh somewhat of a media frenzy buzzfeed said james corden has been exposed aol called it dream shattering carpool karaoke who called it what aol are we really i'm sorry primary source aol what year is it i don't know if that's like you're allowed to use that headline america online so yeah aol which hasn't been relevant for a thousand years i think it's very possible that like there's people watching that do not know what aol is oh yeah that's i used to that's how i used to get online in america uh want to feel old did they

have it and you're just in britain online bol that's a good point we did have aol but only for emails oh so we had america online for sending letters that's so weird it was strange dude we i don't remember i don't remember logistics of the internet at all all i remember is desperately desperately trying to get access to the matrix online oh dude just working so hard on my not mine on my mom's dog shit pc and terrible i also tried to get onto the matrix online and it worked a little bit and then not at all dude i and now it's shut down yeah it's gone never going to get open somebody with a private server please get us involved uh yeah do they run i would like to play as the seraphim yeah if i could choose actually yeah isn't that the one where spoiler alert morpheus

dies doesn't morpheus die in online or Path of Neo? I believe he does die in that and maybe because it's canon. Yeah, it's canon. Not in the Animatrix. And then that was the whole thing about like, hey, why is Lawrence Fishburne not in the new movie? Exactly. And they're like, well, because in the Matrix online. Yeah, shit.

I don't know. It's all right. We found another one. Yeah. We found another one of those guys. Yeah. You know? This isn't Lawrence Fishburne.

Where do you think this video could lawrence fishburne where do you think this video could possibly go for the next four and a half minutes i he it's weird to have kicked it's almost insecure that he kicked it off with like that little apology sigh etc because now it's just partially like a real excuse like no well no actually i do drive it most of the time it wasn't that day. Okay, either just don't address it or only joke about it. Who cares? Yeah, who cares?

Look, I'm just shocked I've done something that upset people more than cats. Right? Hey, he's poking a little fun at himself. Hey, look, I can criticize myself, man. I'm a little unfun, what can I say? Look at him having fun. He's having so much fun joking about himself. Hey, dude, he treats his staff really bad, I heard. I forgot Reggie watched this.

Yes. The one that hurt the most was when I got called a f***ing liar, right? And that was by the Twitter user, Assgaze. Okay? No, this is rough, man. This is like some boomer Twitter. Hey, you ever notice that theernames are sometimes a little odd? I upset ass gays.

Okay, sure, pal. Well, maybe get a real name, you know? Yeah, but... This reminds me of like a bygone age. You know what I mean? Which it's like, maybe it's just because, yeah, we've fallen out. It reminds me of a time when the internet was new. Yeah, right?

To make the joke of okay get a get a real name yeah do you remember at midnight uh yes i never really watched it that was the chris hardwick one yeah yeah a great concept for a show it's a quiz no it's a it's basically like an improv like like like make a joke about a thing. Oh, points. Points. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then it just went away for no reason. Yeah.

That and Breaking Red. Whatever the fuck that show's called. Chatty man. Fucking Walking Dead after show. Oh, yeah. It's done. Time to talk. Are people watching this?

Yeah. Why is it in my YouTube shorts? Clips of The Walking Dead. Never seen it. That's wild. Please stop. My shorts are like, I took this shelter dog

for a day on the town. Someone adopt it, please. To get that, instead of the Joe Rogan shorts that I get, where every single one starts with, so there's this guy. So did you guys hear about this guy that so he does free solo but he kisses the mountain every time or something like yeah this guy had sex with space neil was telling me about it is that what joe rogan talks about i don't even know it's just all weird uh weird anecdotes about a thing that is a lie yeah like like when uh matt watson got beat up by

you know dad right i can't believe a father i can't believe a father did that to his son dude um he rules his brain's broken he's the best um and by the best i mean the worst yeah oh come on man i mean some of mine's basketball stuff some of mine, there's fitness stuff in here. Do you find that if you do watch more of, say, the basketball stuff, it starts drawing you into some Andrew Tate stuff maybe? I still have not gotten any of the alpha male stuff. What's going on? Oh, you think it's actually because I've maybe watched it for stream or something?

Oh, yeah. You watched it on your main account? It's been a long time. I moved twice since i last watched i have burner youtube accounts for my dirty youtube history that i can't expose it's usually for stream maybe it's ethan on the ip yeah he's like you're attached to a guy who just watches the worst show the most evil man i know this is Gotta clap for ass gays. That neon clap sign is busy.

There are people I would lie to in this world, but I would never lie to ass gays. It's just like the joke has already been made. What are the numbers? What did this show pull numbers-wise per episode? Because I don't know people that watch it, but also I don't know a lot of people that watch terrestrial TV. Well, this clip getting 25 million views is pretty impressive.

But I heard that the show, I actually was going to bring this up. I think the show was like hemorrhaging money. James Corden show loses money. Because they didn't just drop him, they dropped the show. Yeah, late night show was losing up to 20 million a year. It cost between 60 to 65 million a year to produce that's oh yeah how where is the money going what does james pull what is james's chunk of that that's a great question because this show i could have sworn was like the lower

production version of one of these shows yeah what is what's falling cost i mean i'm sure more but not double right um six million a year where's 10 times that going for that production? I don't know. What? Shout out, James. Okay, let's look at Cracked. Remember when Cracked.com was a website? Dude, did we travel back in time for this episode, by the way? Yo, can you boot up something awful, maybe some Newgrounds? Yeah, for real.

CBS could not afford him anymore? Though CBS has claimed they desperately tried to retain Corden for an extra three seasons before he made the decision to walk i mean damn no amount of money would make me be able to tolerate that much hate if if i was already like rich enough to retire then i don't know if i would stick around to be yelled at by two assholes on a podcast so yeah the 65 million figure that stellar was given is staggeringly high price tag for a format that historically doesn't need much of a soundstage more than a

soundstage a desk an uncomfortable couch what a straight like i mean obviously we're not the first to touch on like hey late night is kind of an outdated formula and maybe not a great investment and not super duper funny yeah but i mean there's certainly an audience right certain demographic uh it's just such a it's such an odd thing to want to emulate and launch a new version of trying to bet on like i mean some of these shows are daily literally right like every night how do you absorb how do you cannibalize an audience do you watch two of these in a row yeah

so they can both talk about the Cheeto in chief or whatever it looks like okay so the finale of the show got 1.4 million that's not a lot

that's not a lot at all yeah for a finale of a show for a the series finale of an 8 year run 60 million a year dude TV is dying man

that's rough this is this is unreal do you watch outside of like like athletics do you watch anything on TV TV

um one of my favorite shows uh The Good Doctor actually runs on network television you've watched the latest season right oh every episode he gains a new autism power

I haven't seen a single could fire lasers now um no shot james corden's middle name is kimberly that's awesome that's the best thing about him that's kind of cool actually um that and his six million dollar salary yeah mate where is 54 million dollars going how much was the desk to pay for every year reggie's bringing in 30 um okay james corden's regular viewership is 600k an episode that's a jarvis johnson gold number that's actually fucking no where's my 65 million bro wait yeah can we have 60 million for the Chad Chad podcast episode, please? Yeah, can we please?

Dude, our production, our uncomfortable couch costs, I don't know, $600. Jacob, what are we paying you? It's in the six million range, right? Yeah, when he started, it was four to six million. Right, of course. But then you were in Cats. Then he was in Cats, and his numbers shot straight up. The last episode of Sad Boys will pull better numbers.

This is wild actually. Dude, we pull better numbers than that by watching a racist reality TV show. Okay, so these numbers are good, but I mean, you think about how much they cost. Where is he on the older? Oh, he's 37. Down here. He's 37th on CBS alone.

Beat by Colbert, beat by, well, everything. Yeah. He's kind of beat by everything. Wait, does that mean he's,

is he literally the lowest on the entire network? I don't think they're showing us beyond 37. Uh, what's 60 minutes and young Sheldon right at the beat. You see a couple, couple people shout us out. They're like, my mom watches young Sheldon. at the beat you see a couple people shout us out they're like my mum watches young Sheldon actually

did that happen yeah like actually I know quite a few people that watch young Sheldon this is interesting uh name two shows on CBS that aren't 60 minutes

of James Corden. Or Young Sheldon. Actually, no, no, no, no, no. Here's another thing. True crime dramas. Not true crime dramas. What are they called? What are those police shows?

You know what I'm talking about, right? Like a CSI? Yeah. What's the CSI of CBSbs tbh uh idk uh in cis oh that one yeah that gets 6.6 million views an episode it's just a regular one it's not like yeah do you know what ncs stands for by the way no because i sex it's naval it's only the navy isn't that crazy what it's just it's like a regular crime show but then at the end of like and he killed her and had a boat he used to be in the navy i don't know that's a really good youtube that do you know what ncis

stands for is a great youtube show i can't like also i mean i don't even want to talk about it but like is it csi special victims unit no that's law and order law and a special victims unit it you know what the special element is yeah crazy crazy that a daytime drama is all about assault it's uh john mulaney actually has a great bit on this in his 2009 comedy special the top part um maybe it was 2008 where not the bottom it's the top part uh yeah it's like his bit about the king um what's it not king minus what's the one with the baby the baby splitting like two mothers fighting over their baby the the millennia bit is about how Ice-T, they will just say, like, the victim had anal contusions or whatever. Yeah.

What's that mean? What's a contusion? Yeah, it's like listing things. What's murder? It's like, you're telling me this creep got off on little kids? And it's like, yeah, you work in the sex crimes division. How are you surprised every week? So I'm just going to list off shows that are on CBS that do not sound like shows.

Can you, yeah, give me, wait, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hit me and then see if, give me the first letter of one. F. Think of police. Fuck fuck a criminal no think of think of a three-letter organization oh uh is it fbi colon something well just fbi this is a show called fbi There's FBI. What? Is there a CIA? There's also FBI colon. In the top 10 of CBS shows, there's FBI and two FBI colons. Really? Yes.

What are they? FBI International. That's a CIA. Outside of your jurisdiction. I don't know if you should be allowed to be the international federal that's just what the CIA

is and then FBI state level FBI universe so there's also FBI most wanted and then there's NCIS of course but then there's also fbi most wanted oh okay and then there's ncis of course but then there's

one but to who there's two ncis colons uh uh ncis nights ncis hawaii oh oh it's the other one location yeah uh what's regular one i don't even know the navy the water the most boring possible place considering it's a production does it happens in los angeles is it on it has to be on the coast right for navy purposes great question yeah um ncis la yes it's ncis los angeles i cannot believe you just rather done they don't want to put more effort yeah they literally are like we're i don't know here wait there's a show just called swap oh god damn it i was gonna ask you about that one just organization yeah it's just like name another organization there's a show called so help me todd what is that oh do you reckon that's one of those like young rock young sheldon it's a character from something

oh you might be right oh wait no let me guess let me guess guess It's a King of Queens style I'm a Bad Husband drama or Last Man Standing It sounds like it The series follows a talented but directionless private investigator who begrudgingly agrees to work at his overbearing mother's law firm

Oh, what the hell? How many episodes? Is Skylar Astin in it? Total, episodes is Skylar Astin in it or total how many episodes there's one season and 20 episodes but it's been renewed in February for the second season so help me Todd

so there's another show called Neighborhood there's another show called East New York what even is this these are just locations I don't East there's another show called East New York. What even is this? Is that one even a crime one? These are just locations. I don't East New York. Dude, James is taking the L to these,

to 36 of these shows. It's a drama. Deputy Inspector. Is this all about crime? It's not that crime. Why is it all about crime? East New York. Not West Coast New York west literally all of these shows

so help me fire country oh i was gonna say there's another show about i think it's about firefighters it must be it's just organizations and locations blue bloods that's another police one that's that like there's like four generations of police all at the same time or something they've got a guy that's three years older than tom selleck because if they were any older like his actual dad's age they would be dead yeah you cannot have police don't live that long and then there's a equalizer the equalizer oh like the movie maybe with danzel so yes it's a crime drama I know everyone was wondering about this. And this reboot stars Queen Latifah. Really? Yeah.

Oh, that's cool. Yeah, three seasons. All right. Speaking of network hosts, we talked about Blue Sky on one of the older episodes, and I already am not using it, but I check it every now and then. It's still just like I have one invite.

I can invite you to it now. Oh, please. But Jimmy Fallon joined it. Oh, thank God. Now it's funny. And so Jimmy Fallon joined it, and people immediately started bullying him. It's so mean. It's so funny.

So Jimmy Fallon posted this image of him playing tears of the kingdom which by the way oh it's so good it's so innocuous it's just a guy having fun yeah jimmy fallon's just like i'm playing this i'm just like you his his caption is day one jumping in jumping in he looks kind of miserable he's a little bit jumping in because he's jumping down into the world but he's also jumping into blue sky and then he's also jumping into blue sky. And then he's also jumping into a blue sky like Link in Tears of the Kingdom. Great game. Sold 10 million copies first three days.

Crazy. You're welcome. And all the videos of people making stuff are so good. Anyway, everyone saw this and said, fuck you, Jimmy Fallon, pay your staff. But I do think that he came out and said he was going to do that is he are they just referencing the writer's strike they are oh because because there was a story a while at least i think so there was a story a while back about how seth

myers was going to cover his right his uh writer's salary for as long as he could and people were like okay jimmy fallon your move like you need to do this too because he hadn't at that point because i think that there was a tweet about some writers for fallon were like on a zoom call and they were told that they would you know have two weeks and they were like whatever um but then i think he did come out and say that he was going to support them for some amount of time. And he also picketed, but that's, you know, just could just be optics. So I don't know. What's a blue sky?

What do you put? And then. Like a true social is a truth. A tweet is a Twitter is a truth. Oh, do you want to know? Yeah. It's a skeet. Are you serious? Well, that's what the community is.

Oh, okay. I thought maybe Jack just didn't know. It's not the official thing, no. But that's the term that people have chosen. Oh, man, that's unfortunate. Skeet. But everybody just makes jokes about it. I don't know.

It feels kind of like tongue-in-cheek because everybody's in on the joke. Does it feel different, Bruce? No. I mean, the people on it are a specific crowd so it feels different for that reason but hey let me just say boy am i less incentivized to use twitter now that i have to every single time i look at replies harshly swipe to get past all the blue checks oh it's like the site is just slower it's like oh i can see the replies in about 10 seconds once and then the ads also in the replies dude it's like i hate when just slower. It's like, oh, I can see the replies in about 10 seconds. And then the ads also in the replies.

It's like I hate when you're reading replies and then you find yourself reading an ad. And then you're like, what the fuck is this? It doesn't even make me want the thing. It just makes me hate everything. It's the most unpleasant time to present me an ad. Yeah, exactly. Seriously, the worst thing about the blue check thing right now,

it's not just getting prioritized or having bad takes on stuff is that blue checks are really unfunny. Yeah. So if it's a shit post, the first thing I have to see is like, um, this saving this one. Yeah. I'll just leave this here. And then it's just a laughing picture of Dexter or something. Yeah.

This is, what is this? Twitter, um, hired. Okay. So in other Twitter news. Oh, yeah. There's a funny thing. Before we talk about the new Twitter CEO, at which point I do not have a take,

I thought this was funny. I don't understand the Twitter community context, like community notes, but they are maybe the only good feature of twitter in the elon era and um so uber did this ad and uber of course is paying for the gold check um when you drive with uber you're the boss hashtag uber hashtag earn like a boss and then readers added context uber advertises earn like a boss however in reality uber driver compensation averages $11.77 per hour. And then this tweet has been deleted because there was a story.

He deleted it. Twitter reportedly lost $40 million in ad revenue after two notable companies received community notes on their ads. Oh, that's so sick. Yeah. There's got to be a link here. Oh, Dexterito is paying for the thing too, but where's the link? What's that corporate check putting them back? $1,000 a month.

Which is... For a corporation, it's nothing, but that's... For a corporation, it's nothing, but also for Twitter, it's nothing. It's so embarrassing. Because there's so few corporations who are going to pay that price tag. There's just not enough companies with followings on Twitter.

If a thousand did it, it's nothing. That's the thing. It's like it doesn't make any sense. It's a feature to support. It's a thing for people to complain about. Oh, that's interesting, though, because I'm trying to search for the Dexterito source, and it does not come up. So, I mean, now it's just hearsay. What was the other one?

Like, what was the other? I don't know, because I would love to know. Someone said 1000% Samsung was one of them. Oh, it could be because of the fake moon ad that samsung did oh is it just speculative well now it's speculative because there's no fucking link i don't know how they posted this and they didn't post the link and or didn't leave the tweet up like what the shit is that look at me i care about my sources when i resource yeah especially if you're like trying to be a journalistic outlet

there's no following all the rules yeah oh you don't lie online fake news there's a uh but yeah there's a new twitter ceo and everybody's mad that's such a god that felt good yeah because i know they're still not because what he's still having a product or whatever or nominally by title something he's he's like still divesting himself from the company i think eventually i don't know but it's having a horrible time clearly he just gets to post absolute banger memes um I also serve memes. Yeah. I'm also serving the memes. I also serve a lot of memes.

I also serve a lot of memes. He like speaks over himself. He like stumbles and then the crowd's like, yeah, man. Hell fucking yes. Hey, we're Bill Maher's audience. We have no opinions or taste. A lot of people, like the new Twitter ceo got like 400 000 followers like overnight after being announced and the all the replies to her tweets are like are you gonna keep this a free speech platform because that doesn't seem like what you care about you tweeted about the vaccine

you know that's fake right like like it's weird it's all from blue checks is that even an opinion that like elon espouses that the vaccine's fake i think whenever somebody says something like about the vaccine elon goes interesting looking into the fixing it contacting support firing whoever made it she sucks right i don't know anything about her she's an ad exec so she has like horrible political opinions oh i i don't doubt it i mean she kind of has to suck because she's like an ad exec right like oh did she get that blue check for free whoa tell us that's crazy is she notable damn it's a legacy one it may be good it might be stupid so that's may 14th she deleted it wait no because oh wait never mind never mind never mind i lied i lied i lied oh my god like dexer um yeah look at the replies this 7,900 replies

5,000 replies people want to be heard so bad I guarantee it's all blue checks going don't bring world economic forum policies to twitter we don't believe in global government of unelected elitists and neither does your new boss yeah i think she's like an advocate or member of oh and like an advocate for many other think tank style organizations which is like yeah okay so all these freaks are

they all have like financial interest in will you denounce the world economic forum no i truly do i don't even have the context and i think this is like such a weird she just supports it and it's like it's a government think tank so that's if i'm not mistaken right yeah i actually don't know about that i can get my customers to communicate and then they could also buy stuff that sounds pretty good right you'll be able to buy things just directly on twitter one click boom done but they need to feel that one click boom boom done yes you'll be able to buy things on twitter i also serve a lot of memes we don't think of polo he sounds like he's melting there is oh yeah so everybody's just like concerned about censorship you know that like the for you right now is all wonky it's not showing you know it's all over the shop i'm seeing

relatively little Elon discourse. I feel like the fatigue has kicked in a little bit. Oh, yeah. Versus even a month ago. Well, what do you think about my Doge wallet? My Doge official. That's a gold check mark saying, do you like dogs and memes? And then Elanchi Muscomkamoto responds seems so she follows dogecoin

good lord so sick that's probably like somebody told her to follow it so that like the weirdos dude she doesn't even run the account yeah she's wiser than she's like i'm here and i'm excited to uh talk about penn state football and then they're like speak on the world economic forum dude she she doesn't have the twitter trick oh the little staff the little staff one yeah she doesn't still in the interview phase yeah yeah people freaked out huh and of course's like, there's no additional reason why people may not like her specifically less than you. Like, there's no blue checkmark type people. There's nothing about, say,

oh, a woman becoming the CEO, say that they might find off-putting. Yeah. Obviously. Yeah, nothing. Not a single thing. Unless she's all hormonal and she deletes stuff am i right that's got to be a take she's got to start stealing memes do you think

crash course and how to be like an epic poster if you ever go bill maher here's here's my coat yeah exactly house style onboarding. Yeah, here's how you properly crop a meme to exclude the person you're stealing it from. Yeah, 240p is the most that really any meme should be able to be enrolled in. Lower quality means better. Your emerald mind. The other week we talked about the I Show Speed and Kai Sinat music video, the Who Let the Dogs Out. We talked about it on Sad Boys Nights,

our Patreon podcast, which by the way, I want to just say, I know we talk about our Patreon a fair amount. It's because we need people to know that it exists and it's an important part of us being able to continue doing the show. But it's not meant to like give you FOMO.

At the end of the day, it's like entertainment. You know, you're not going to miss, you're not missing anything other than more content but anyway you know free show comes out every week and uh uh but we happen to talk about the and we just couldn't because of YouTube uh YouTube copyright thing um and the fact that iShowSpeed has been like using that company that improperly copyright claims people like it's a new thing so yeah too much too much risk but kai and speed made a music video and i think they're working a lot together

recently because there's talk are you are you up to speed about the like stream stream wars of the streaming platforms uh up to speed and so that recent recent there's a real recent development yeah it seems pretty big but we'll see so you know there's kick and they paid they paid aiden ross a lot of money to like kind of shepherd their thing. And they're financed by the crypto gambling website stake. Like I think it's co-owned by the stake people. And then there's rumble, which is the sneakers on there. That's all I know. I don't like know their vibe other than that.

It's the, I mean, is sneaker's on there that's all i know i don't like know their vibe other than that it's the i mean it's the fake numbers alternative that all of the uh people that are too psychopathic be allowed on even kick right because it's people like it's like aiden ross except they like did kill someone because like i know sneaker's on there and then like aiden and sneaker have been streaming a lot lately according to i do get some of these youtube shorts of sneak sneaker and aiden talking oh jesus yeah it's it's awesome well that's where uh steven crowder went to rumble once he got booted oh and the numbers are fake they're completely fake the other part of the discourse is that people are saying, why doesn't Kai have a Twitch deal?

He's the biggest creator on the platform. All these creators are getting paid a bag. You know, Ludwig got paid a ton of money to go over to YouTube exclusively from Twitch, and Twitch isn't footing money for their creators to stay on the platform. But by all virtue of not having a deal, there's also no exclusivity in the new partner agreement.

So theoretically, and also Speed is a YouTube streamer, I should say, and Kai is on Twitch. Kai and Speed have a show that's going to be streamed that is on Rumble exclusively. What the fuck? And there is a thing that aiden said like aiden said that kick offered them 40 million dollars and they turned it down to go to rumble that's what that's what aiden said god what a frustrating source yeah literally damn it if that's true it's interesting and i hope man i don't think aiden ross knows what

order numbers go in yeah he could mean like two um he's the equalizer yeah so they're gonna stream on their own platforms but then they're also gonna do an exclusive show on rumble i've been thinking since you've been let's start our own show no man I'm getting out professional football player professional footballer man united what the hell is going on this is this is like uh deep dream yeah like what Anybody gonna watch this? Yeah, you right. You born to suck anyways, bro. You from Ohio. This bitch is from the Bronx. Bro. Fuck you.

What the fuck? Well, that's just like exactly what a nightmare feels like. Do you know what I mean? It's like the pieces make sense while you're watching it and then you wake up and it's like the pieces make sense while you're watching it and then you take a you wake up and it's like oh that was just bad just feel awful there's a tiger i think it was my dad it's like looks so expensive to produce that trailer how much do you want to bet none of that is in the show oh you know when if you watch like an anime op it's all animated

only for the op it's on clips from the show i just can't imagine how that would be live any of those clips yeah you know what i mean i mean i is are they trying to do like a wild boys jackass thing is that like maybe but live at that product i mean i guess just not going to be that production level yeah maybe they just pre-film it then put it live yeah like it. Like it's a YouTube premiere. I, that, look, I don't like that this is my opinion because it feels like such an old man take. They're so fucking loud. Oh no.

You're doing it. You're doing the thing. It's so fucking loud all the time, dude. It's so tiring. How do people watch it? It's like sour gummies. Like when you're a kid, you can handle it, like the stimulation. But now it's like uh sour gummies like when you're a kid you can handle it like the stimulation but now it's like can you just chill dude yeah like i really i finally like

got into demon slayer it's like a really good show i enjoyed it burned through it but there are parts where i've like paused it or jumped forward because there's just so much screaming like in between and not like shonen fight screaming it's comedy bits right and it's not an unfunny show but every now and then the the punchline will just be like oh yeah i can what the how do people it's giving me more tinnitus it's so much it's like stage voice but like you have to be screaming yeah it doesn't work in any other setting like it's just streaming it doesn't feel like it works with like acting yes because it's funny to be like you're from ohio but i mean you know i also have to acknowledge that like there's like a trope of like black boys being

you know kind of criticized for this where like other people wouldn't but I think that Jake Paul was this yeah I mean by some but yeah my yeah if someone's a shitty driver I'm not going to race so just like wow you crashed into a baby yeah it was bad driving no for sure for sure um yeah this is going to be interesting i could you know what i'm excited that i have no idea what it is yeah i'm so curious i'm curious to see what it is i like speculate a little bit please i think maybe they didn't know what it was yeah we know uh not a not a friend of ours but we i don't know if you've also had this anecdote someone we know was uh planning a live show prepping for a live show yes i do know this matter of fact uh-huh and planned nothing and was bragging about having planned nothing

because they don't have to you know they're just famous so it's like it's just free money yeah or whatever which is it might be extremely unethical to get people to buy tickets but they like they don't strike me as sit down and planners they don't live in the same place like i'm i think it's worth noting that where does Speed live? Ohio Didn't you Watch the trailer Oh I thought it was Kai That lived in Ohio Kai is from the Bronx Huh

I guess yeah Maybe they met up Directly in the middle Yeah Where do they have tigers? I don't know Like this just doesn't It just doesn't make sense

Yeah Yeah Oh my The more obvious example Of Rumble is Andrew Tate That's the Andrew Tate Screaming part Oh I didn't know He was on there Okay It's where they all go Sneako Leafy Yeah, yeah. Oh, the more obvious example of Rumble is Andrew Tate. That's the Andrew Tate streaming platform. Oh, I didn't know he was on there.

Okay. It's where they all go. Sneako, Leafy. I wonder, yeah, this is interesting. Because I feel like, doesn't Kick have better PR than Rumble? So that's interesting. I think Rumble maybe is making a play because Rumble predates Kick, but has no relevance to anybody anybody but the smaller andrew

tate fans you know what i mean it's like they don't have anybody with even a tenth of that kind of yeah yeah because like stephen crowder isn't popular but his audience is dumb and they're not gonna like follow you to a platform or the only reason like people like that watch anything is because it's easy yeah you want everything in their life to be easy so like i think this could actually work because they're doing something different like go to rumble to watch a thing you've never seen these two guys do right together yeah exactly so i think it'll be interesting i mean i'll no i'm not gonna go on rumble but i'll wait for takes to show up yeah i'll watch a summary yeah with the volume really a very strong compressor i've been wanting to watch the tiktoks from this girl who keeps coming

up on my i was gonna say my for you page but really just twitter feed but i don't know if it's going to be good or bad but it's in the genre of those like sci-fi pov like creative writing type it's always like ya style novels like yeah yeah hunger games anime rules or something right right where uh it's like POV, you just got expelled from your combat boarding school for wearing pink, and you just want to show off to the boys. A universe where love feels bad and hate feels good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why won't you let me back in?

You know I'm the top of my class. They are weird because they're like, there's a reason they aren't actual books, and it's because the premise is like not. It's like a little bit absurd. But yeah, so this girl has been conquering the internet. And I'm. Oh, she is especially popular.

Yeah, I think she is. P.O.V. Her name is Brianna Godry. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good.

Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good.

Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good.

Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good.

Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good.

Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good.

Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good.. Audrey? Goudry? How would you say this? Brian. Brian Naguidry. Yeah. Brian Naguidry.

Naguidry. Can we use that word? Yeah. Is that for Italians only? Yeah. She has 3 million on TikTok, so that's sick. Try that. Okay. POV, every time you fall fall in love you lose 10 years off your life

how was school great i'm in love uh-oh with who with three boys jason kevin timmy no oh my god you're dead that's more than three first of all oh you can't fall in love with people that easily every time you fall in love with someone new you lose 10 years off your lifespan don't was she gonna live a hundred years she was she was about to live to be 106 yeah uh to the audio listeners it is a uh it says she's six years old which is why she's doing at the one of the creepiest voices she's got pigtails like six rolls yeah you gotta have those and she's turning to her mom who i guess has not mentioned the rules yeah her yeah her mom let her i feel like these are always in like a wizard school and she hasn't got her like wizard powers yet

or something oh shit by the way oh by the way no don't say that you're gonna cut what kind of mother lets you cut 30 years off your life walks you into that line of questioning and then like what was the first thing she said great i'm in love don't say uh-oh with who you wait you crazy mom you walked her into that she didn't even lose it until she said it out loud yeah she was still at an empty hundred she said i'm in love don't say uh-oh with who say stop don't tell me a single thing about these guys do not feel that way ever yeah uh until you're ready to do it just once and then maybe you can sacrifice 10 years yeah it's weird right because these are always uh i mean the whole thing with

ya novels is they usually like the high concept of them is usually something that resonates with teenagers because it's like a a super dramatic version of a feeling they have right right they don't have like a lot of life experience but they have the feeling right right so whoa uh uh uh dis dis what the fuck is there's a divergent divergent is just the high school cafeteria like here's the nerds they sit over here and here's the gamers and then here's the jocks or whatever and it's just that but it's a world yeah uh like the maze runner is i don't know like the sats or some shit it's always that but this is what like love is i didn't think she'd start at six yeah i didn't think it'd be 10 years is she gonna is she gonna learn about like the issues like

so she just got explained after she lost 30 years of her life. Her mom explained the rules to her. It's a good job she was going to live to 100, by the way. Yeah. Not 40. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Like, imagine. Like, oh, you're gone.

Whoops. With three boys. Stop. Jason, Kevin, Timmy. No, you can't fall in love with people that easily. Every time you fall in love with someone new, you lose 10 years off your lifespan. Brianna, look at this picture of Jacob. Age 16.

No, what are you doing? Wait a second. The math doesn't add up. Oh, yeah. Wait. Because when she was six, she had 70 years left. Now that she's 60. Okay, so when she was six, she had 100 years left.

And then her mom. Her mom let her say three boys. So then she went down to 70 years left, which means she would live to 76. She didn't just let her say three boys. She was like, go ahead. Go ahead. Say a few boys. Oh, my bad.

And then we fast forwarded 10 years and she still has 70 years yeah maybe uh if you every time you hate someone you get 10 years back or something oh lordy's abs wow it's the best sound effect wait she's physically looking at the number yeah she can see her all right when you fall in love, falling in love is looking at a picture of Jason Elordi's abs. Losing 10 years for each ab. And it's worth it.

Oh, let me tell you. Let me tell you. She doesn't even love him. It's fake. I do love how she said, Wow. Wow. Boom.

Boom. The decade. Yeah. Oh, no. Now I'm only going to live till I'm 60. I can't. Wait. So this is not years left.

This is the age you'll live to? Oh, yeah, because it says eight years left. Yeah. So I guess. Yeah, I mean, I guess same difference, kind of. I guess. It's like, I'm just going to say the rules are not clear. This book sucks.

Ever fall in love again, so don't show me any more pictures of men with six-packs. Also, I get that this is like satire or whatever, or maybe it's not, I don't know. But like, really? Six-packs are what you need to fall in love with somebody. It feels a little bit teensy-weensy, a little bit like watching 1, 2, 3, Go.

Oh, it does feel like one two three it's it's not just okay how much is serious how much is weird it's the part that's like blowing me away is how does the human brain come up with this it's just amazing like i don't have the material i don't have the gray matter to be able to put this together right it's like it's impressive because of how it's it's like tears of the kingdom like how did you make this they optimized it so well how did you do like truly it feels impossible that you did this on such a on such a device as the switch how many does she have gotta be hundreds i've come up with that many premises it's kind of cool yeah i know are you really never gonna fall in love again no i'm. I need to live a long life.

What's left of it. So I'm going to be celibate. Class, we have a new student. Jake, he came all the way from England. Hello, everybody. Who did she say that to? Well, they were just having a conversation. Was it her teacher or her mom?

I guess that was best friend that showed her the abs. And then she's still 16. Right. Okay. Did she go to class? Yeah, so now she's in class, and hello, everyone. Imagine, dude, imagine you're sat in math, and you just hear...

And she's like, oh, no, 10 more years. And they're like, what are you looking at? And she's like, there's a 50 right here. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. Like, are you expelled? You're crazy. Oh, the British. Oh,ish oh no you found love again you know there's a way to reverse it right what really you have to fall

into hate oh fall out of love within one day oh what oh it's done oh okay pov you get chosen to test out the new ai assistant but it's not what you expected hashtag story acting viral for you scary scary uh-oh it's scary good morning brianna how may i assist you today hello mom why is there a robot above my head oh you got one oh i got this i loved it it's always um oh you got one oh yeah that's the thing it's like it's like the young adult thing It's like oh you have the thing not everybody has the only one with this thing and you're lucky Only a few people were chosen to test out the new AI assistant Hello, Brianna. What can I assist you with? No, thanks. I don't need any help. You can find someone else. Hello,

Brianna. How may I assist you? She's like, tries to walk away from the thing that's floating above her head. Yeah, it's like stuck to her foot. Okay, I thought it was going to be like, wow, this is so convenient. And then, wait, how did you know my boyfriend's name if I never, I don't know, like,

it's scary because of how much access it has. Right. And this is just like, it's following me around. I don't like like it's scary because of how much access it has right and this is just like it's following me around Leave you alone. I want to bribe is gonna fall on me Look I told you I don't need any help so just leave me alone. Hey, baby Jake I missed you so much How may I assist you Brianna

It's got a little toad now How may I It's like It's like smart house It's exactly like smart house How may I assist you Ben Just trying to help but fine

You can assist me By never speaking again. Jake! That doesn't help. Bad assistant. For the audio listeners, the AI assistant killed Jake. He shot it with a laserake just shot it with a laser

holy shit shot it with a star wars bolt in a million years i would have never guessed it just killed jake i thought it was gonna be like is it because she's like now he'll never speak again yeah or is it just you insulted me so yeah you killed him you stupid robot killed him you stupid robot oh 10 years hello i am brianna help. I'm the real Brianna. Ooh. They Freaky Friday'd. Now you're trapped in a computer. What if she kills her robot boyfriend?

Yeah. She's like, now I can finally go on a date with Jake Bot. Ten years of my life from falling in love. No. No. Not Jake Bot. Not Not Jakebot I loved him What if we started calling you Jakebot Jacob how would you feel about that

That'd be cool Yeah we'd just replace you with a robot An advanced AI scary Okay so now we're on part 2 Wait so she's back now Brianna's a person again I guess How may I assist you Brianna's a person again. I guess. How may I assist you, Brianna?

You can assist me by never speaking again. Jake! You killed him, you stupid robot! Hello, I am Brianna. Help! Help! I'm the real Brianna. Somebody get me out of here. Your line is, how may I assist you today? Hey, Bri, I've been looking for you. Hi. No, stay away from Stephanie.

She's my best friend. We are best friends. Yeah? Why are you acting strange? I am not. He did! You can't believe it's just shooting them with lasers. AI assistant.

AI assistant. This could be mech. You can't. Dude, do not question a Gundam. This could be a ghost. Why is it an AI assistant? I love that you can shoot lasers, but you can't use a more realistic sounding voice.

I am regular Brianna. I am your friend. Hey Brianna, why are you speaking so weird? Die! This is awesome. Imagine this as a YA novel. It's just Brianna walking up to people

and shooting them with a laser. What did you just shoot laser beams out of my eyes? Don't underestimate the- Hold on. Why is that the question and not? You just murdered Stephanie, my best friend. Well, I mean, even when she killed her boyfriend, she had the energy of like, oh, you keyed my car. Yeah.

She's like, oh, come on. Come on. You killed Jake. Gotta find another boyfriend 10 years in your life. God damn it. Power of AI. I am Brianna. Brianna, there you are.

I'm a part of the AI assistant software team. We've come across a problem. There is no problem. I fully thought she was about to kill him. Wait, and this is about three. I thought it was going to be like, I'm part of the FBI for robots. FBI.

I'm going to take you out. The FBI. That actually goes hard. And oh, what's that? It's now the number one show on CBS. Oh, no, please. FBI starring Queen Latifah and The Rock. She's back.

Young FBI. What's the name of the genre? The unfortunate thing is I think it's POV oh damn yeah or story yeah pov story oh wait there's another is that a different person doing ai yeah huh oh wait really are they like jack and her style? It's an adaptation to And just dub in the right language Just put in the Make it seem like me, Jordan, knew What the right language was

I think it's German It could be Dutch It could be, I guess Alright, this is Peevee Oops Jump scare I'm gonna be your shampoo I guess. All right. This is POV. Oops. Jump scare. I'm going to be your shampoo.

I guess we should talk about. Got to catch up on Enoch sometime. Yeah, we should. No. POV, you were born with a curse where if you speak, you die. But dot, dot, dot, hashtag story acting viral for you. Yeah, because word spoken, seemingly if this hits one, that's a problem. So this started at age six.

They all started at age six. You know when you start speaking at age six. No, you can never take the tape off. It must stay on forever. You were born with a curse. If you speak, you die. She's just doing that thing where for sleep quality reasons, she puts tape over it. She's got hostage tape.

Yeah. Hostage brand tape. That's a scary name for that product. Have you seen that on Instagram? Yes. Hostage tape. Yeah, that's wild. Imagine like you don't, I'm trying to think of the circumstances,

but like you walk it like I'm sleeping in or something and you need to wake me up for the podcast. You like come into my bedroom and I've just got a hostage tape over my mouth. I'm just using a hostage tape and sleepy rope to tie myself up. Yeah. I'm so tired. I'm so tired. I've increased my sleep quality with hostage tape and tie up rope. This seems like a kink.

Yeah dude, it's literally just like, I have sleep apnea so I'm taking myself to Guantanamo. Look at the loser tape mouth over there. I love that, I love the YA slurs. It's gotta be bullying but you can't say like these. Yeah, it's mudblood, you know what I mean? Which is so much worse than most names. Mudblood is a good slur. Like, I'll give credit where credit's due. JK really came up with a good one.

I mean, if there's one thing she can do. There. Shh, she's looking this way. What if she can hear us? Don't worry, she can't hear. Huh? Oh, you're so right. She obviously can't hear if she can't speak.

These kids are 17. This is wild. These are very strange children. Hey, Tape Mouth. I mean, Brianna. I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go to the movies with me after school. Dude, she actually bought it. She's so gullible. Hey, Tape Mouth. Let's trip her. Aw, poor Tape Mouth. Hey, I'm gonna trip you.

Damn. Tape Mouth, it's kind of cool. Yeah, Tape Mouth, it sounds like a band. I'm in Tape Mouth. I'm in Tape Mouth. I don't care anymore I don't want to live like this why did I just get money

she knows twists dude yeah tape mouth over here knows what she's doing. I never would have in a million years. Once again, I've been bamboozled. It's a curse, by the way. I like that, too, that there's no world building as to, like, why she's the only one with a magic curse.

Yeah. Because that's not a wizarding world, right? Yeah. Oh, shit, maybe it was. Also, giving somebody a heads up before you bully them is funny to me hey tape mouth let's go tripper time to trip you i guess you can't hear in the in their in their minds oh yeah that was very odd because you can't hear that's maybe what's another words book oh it's a sequel we gotta get the Honey, you're home from school early.

Mom, you lied to me. Speaking doesn't kill me. It gives me money. Don't speak. I did this to protect you. Do you really think the government will let you live freely with this kind of power? Now put the tape back on and never speak again. Where's it come from?

Where does the money come from and where does it go? Yeah, where's it going? Are you getting it in cash? It's in her mouth. It's being wired to an account? That's so strange. I love that. That's like a, who cares?

I don't know. Maze runner. Hey, girly. What are you doing? Hey. Since when can you speak? I'm trying to understand the logic by which like like why she gets seven hundred thousand dollars for saying hey yeah and then like ten words gave

her like five grand yeah exactly that's what i'm saying i would i would i guess only speak in long sentences and slowly build right what if it's just coming out of the pockets of like the working class just like destroying america imagine like a hustle podcast where guys are explaining like what you gotta understand is you gotta say a lot of words so that you build your money over a slow clip because if you just say one word and get 700 grand easy you don't learn to build you don't learn to grind you're building equity with sentences you they have cursors over their their they have the money counter above their head on their Twitch thing.

It's like... Alright. She's never once looked at her money, did she? That's unlike her. No, what's the total? You've changed. Yeah. Why did you just get money? Why did she see it? Wait, where did she see it? Just check a boss fogger real quick. I'm like, she can see it. Wait, what? Wait, where did she see it? Just check on Wells Fargo real quick.

I'm like, she can see it probably because she saw the plus six. She can see the word spoken. That's so much money so fast. Millions of dollars. You think Chase would maybe call you for security purposes?

They would definitely prevent deposits from being made. Hey, this is going to sound insane. You have to pinky promise you won't tell anyone about it. Oh, pinky promise. That'll protect you. You know what? Quick shout out. I think it's cool. She does do costuming. She changes outfits for different days. Pigtails for six.

Now, this is a fascinating genre, and this is genuinely entertaining. I have a secret to tell you. But you have to pinky promise you won't tell anyone about it. Of course, bestie. Pinky promise. Every time I speak, I get money. Don't worry.

Your secret's safe with me. We've located the girl. We know your secret. You're going to have to come with us. Come on. Oh. We've located the girl. FBI, CIA, TBH. Bang, bang, bang. Oh, man. Money. have to come with us come on oh we've located the girl fbi cia tbh bang bang oh man that's awesome shout out to brianna gudry godry i think it's neat like guidry it's like a very

fun short form creative writing yeah exactly it's not like my brain doesn't work like that i couldn't think of that kind of stuff but it is like i don't know it's nice to be able to burn through an idea like that without like having to because that's just that's just not a novel yeah it would be boring to do it for that long right but it's fun to just hop in and you're like yeah what if a dog had a car yeah yeah yeah um that one's so she's so good at twists no world where I'd be like yeah you get money it like feels like the things she says are not allowed like you're not allowed to go from this thing to this thing

it's too smart yeah um well I think that about wraps this episode of sad boys up but if you are so inclined we will be continuing this episode with a full bonus episode on patreon.com. It's us with that one.

Yeah. He's sad. Boys. Where we will talk about the Shane Dawson Steve-O podcast. We may watch a little bit of that. We've also got some, we're going to talk about people's crazy employment. Oh, yeah. We got some like stories. Listener submitted. Oh, yeah. We got some.

Like stories. Listener submitted. Retail jobs. Yeah. Customer service horrors. Which should be devastating and funny. But until next week, unless you want to join us for the Patreon, we end every episode of Sad Boys with a particular phrase.

We love you. And we're sorry. Boom. Boom. At a deli I worked at at someone threw a pound of liver worst at my head because they didn't like how it was sliced that's crazy.