Sad Boyz - We Ranked The Weirdest Sports In The World

Episode Date: December 6, 2024

Jarvis and Jordan recap the recent Sad Boyz LIVE show, our unique dining experience, and we rank uncommon sports. Exclusive $35-off Carver Mat at AuraFrames.com. Use code SADBOYZ at checkout to save! Head to https://factormeals.com/50sadboyz and use code 50sadboyz to get 50% off your first box and free shipping! Trying My Best merch: https://jarvis.store Sad Boyz Nightz #91 Weekly bonus episodes for only $5/mo at: https://patreon.com/sadboyz Join our Discord ▸ https://discord.gg/Hw82Dhun4m P.O. Box ▸ 3108 Glendale Blvd Suite 540, Los Angeles CA 90039 Play Sad Boyz BINGO ▸ https://sadboyzpod.com/bingo Write To Us ▸ [e-mail] Use the subject line "Pen Palz" and we could read it on the next episode! Our Links ▸ https://linktr.ee/sadboyzpod 00:00:00 Joe Rogan: Fear (is not a) Factor 00:06:52 Sad Boyz LIVE Recap 00:07:56 Performance & Authenticity 00:18:24 Sponsored by: Aura Frames 00:19:49 Sad Boyz Comedy Hour 00:26:16 The Ethics of Christmas Caroling 00:31:52 Sponsored By: Factor Meals 00:33:48 Toad In The Hole: British Cuisine Review 00:37:55 Spotify Madlibs: Angry Goblin Sleaze Rock Ballads 00:42:56 Ranking Uncommon Sports 01:45:03 Sad Boyz Nightz #91

Welcome to Savoy's, a podcast about feelings and other things. Also, I'm Jarvis. I'm Jordan. Oh, I stretched at the wrong time. You're also a ghost? Oh, I stretched too much, I died. You're being haunted by the stretch. Oh, I'm a northern ghost. Oh, now you're a northern ghost. Oh, I died from being from the north.

It's kind of what happened. What happened to you? I don't know why i hesitated what what what what happened it's gonna be so true if heaven's real and we end up there imagine today imagine if i freaking died would you be sad uh okay what are we talking about today i imagine if we go to heaven i mean you know how hard it is to like if someone asks us what we do when we're in an uber imagine how much harder it's going to be with the pearly gaze. Like, what did you do? I'm like, oh, fuck. So it's like, do you keep an eye on Earth? Have you seen some of the stuff I was introduced?

We're kind of just talking, and that's kind of it. That's kind of the end. Oh, like Joe Rogan. Well, it is like, it's not, you're close enough. He's here. He's the new God. Wow, what great or bad timing. Why? How come? Just because uh i don't know what is joe rogan gonna think of me in the pearly gates oh uh-oh bye see ya yeah it's pretty um

homogenous up here now there's a lot of certain types missing he's certain types i don't want to get into it is this the voice of joe it's all mma up here now oh i see that's the type you're referring to when he was hosting fear factor and this is not a joke i did used to watch a lot of fear factor fear is not fear is not a factor for me is what i learned you were bored unless i have to eat like boar nuts or whatever the hell yeah a lot of that show was not like fear as much as it was yuck. It was just disgusting. You have to walk across a thousand tarantulas and they'll all kill you. Or you got to look at my poo-poo.

Yeah. You got to eat the poo-poo of a bad guy. It's like, wait, why do you have to? Are you scared? It's like, well, I wouldn't. Scared isn't really the word I would use. Bothered factor. Yeah, bothered factor.

Disgusting factor. Uncomfortable. It looks like disgustingness is a factor for you. And I'd be like, yes, Joe, it is. Yeah, it is. I'm going to head home, man. What do I win, like 200 bucks before tax if I win this show? Right. I don't really get any sort of fame or fortune out of this. Three bowls to eat. That'll all be going to you.

I used to watch that show, too. And the only thing I remember is that one woman got eliminated because she was putting mascara on and she accidentally scratched her cornea with her mascara brush that's scary for you she's scared yeah i was gonna say i would have been so it turns out that fear and bodily harm are a factor getting hurt factor getting hurt is a factor for you. I was very unironically a big Joe Rogan fan in college because it was just him talking about karate and where the monkeys can drive. And there was no, at the time, very little element.

I think you and Gabrus kind of have the same. Or no. No, you and Hassan. Yes, yeah. I'm a lot like Gabrus and Hassan. I'm jacked. Yeah. I'm jacked, beloved, that kind of shit.

I get it. I mean mean i remember when i first started hearing about him uh again i just kept thinking like from fear factor with no hair now what happened okay whatever you say that just wrote his podcast is really good okay and i should listen to it because it's so long it's's got to be long, but there's only one episode, three a week. He did three of those five billion hour podcasts a week? Isn't that insane?

That's ridiculous. Go see your kids, man. What are you doing? Dude, wow. Can Ben Shapiro hang out that long? I assume you'd have to put him for a down for a nap. I can't do this show that long.

But it's because we don't have Ben. Can you imagine hanging out with ben shapiro for three hours no go insane i'd lose my hair i would go insane for any amount of time he'd probably just tell a joke where you have to smile and nod but you like know immediately based on that joke that you would not get along no no who's there um ben. Okay. Ben who? Ben Shapiro. Okay. Well, that's pretty funny, actually. Yeah, that cursed. That was pretty good.

Yay. I don't know what credits do. I love winning at jokes. Because you know when he makes a joke himself, he has a little self-satisfaction, a little smug look on his face. Because one of his side cameras is like, I did it. And I seeiden is going uh to uh across the world i wonder if he'll need an app because he's so old i know he hasn't full i mean i know he's like still famous and like doing his thing or whatever

but i feel like discussion of ben shapiro has dramatically dipped that's good i hear people making fun of him last which i miss i do miss people well yeah i guess it's just like there's like a silent majority of people that are like or maybe it's a minority it's definitely a minority but it's like a a silent cohort of people who are still like enjoying him yeah i feel like they are maybe they're feeling shame engaged now and he's also less like uh he is a very and has always been to a degree but he's a very difficult like um surrogate to have in the environment if you're like okay well this is his son this is who this one side has and it's like a handsome jacked fun guy right and we've got a thimble sized creep yeah i don't know who ben shapiro is for when you have the nelk boys it does make me feel it i guess that's what being

out of touch from like age or culture or whatever is in that like i will hear a reference to like i hear the nelk boys and i go like oh i do not really understand what they are really. And I will die that without learning. I remember I was working on a Nelk Boys video in like 2020, 2021. And I'm really glad I never put it out because I probably would have had to take like, these guys will never interview the president. Yeah. That being the script was a weird choice. It wouldn't have aged well.

When was this probably? 2020 to 2021. This COVID isn't going on for much longer i do have a covid joke in an old video but it's like it was like 2017 just early enough that i think it's like a joke that doesn't age well because i'm like talking about someone coughing on a plane or something oh i see okay and i can't remember like where it goes but i just know it didn't age well i might be misremembering i think the joke was what is this the china did say so america

yeah you are misremembering okay yeah you're misremembering it so much that i didn't say any of those words or those sounds oh i misremembered it i guess yeah you misremembered it like maybe i'm misremembering there was that time when you said i'm jordan and i'm gonna you aren't entirely misremembered you're closer than my one was i think we have to bleep that out still even though i'm saying it anyway um how you doing how you feeling uh you know it's the funniest thing so we just did the live show we did thank you to everybody that came along and boy are my arms tired yeah we, it was a lot of fighting. We kicked everyone's ass in the audience. We did two live shows on the same day.

So the first of our live shows will be available on our Patreon at patreon.com slash sadboys on December 9th on Monday. And we had some great guests for both of the shows. We had Shane Topp. We had Brian David Gilbert. We had Sandwich. We had Caroline Kwan. It was Brian David Gilbert. We had Sandwich. We had Caroline Kwan. It was a great, grand, old time.

Lots of sad boys' heads came out. A lot of sad boys, including our heads. We were bumping around. We were arms tired. Oh, by the way, the live shows will be available for like three bucks if you want to just purchase them outright. But they'll also come free with a $5 subscription to our patreon if you fancy doing such you are not obliged to it if you fancy but don't don't worry about it it's just content at the end of the day we did that live show and it was like a nice little nice little high nice little bit of fun and then

i remember thinking during the show uh because it's definitely more of a performance right it's a little bit more character on stage and i remember thinking like i am having a good time right now inhabiting this character but i i almost out loud on the show do i okay hold on let me stop you this is a thing that you talk about a lot and i still have no idea what you're talking about i don't know how to describe it like um it inauthentic less authentic but like who cares yeah good i think it's a um you know what it is it's it's it isn't it doesn't matter and i think what it's what it actually is touching on is um i i would say pretty resoundedly that when i was like 15 16 around that age maybe early college too i would i could very much be classified as the

annoying guy and i and not by you know obviously i have my friends and it was like oh geez the funny one doing the jokes but i think that was at the sacrifice of being sincere at the time. And then we've San Francisco in an environment where people are a little more welcoming of the genuineness and the sincerity. Right. Sometimes to a fault. Sometimes a little too sincere. Absolutely. But then I kind of enjoyed that, and it does feel a little more fulfilling.

And then all this to say, in the spirit of Sad Boys that i'm i'm really struggling a little i hear you and i don't think it's conditional and it's i want to get your opinion on this okay i feel like i mean certainly there's plenty of conditional things health well you know it's a bit of a tricky one but i really the it getting darker and gray really fucking bums me oh yeah it just does and anyone that it's whenever people are like i just love the winter i mean no no you're thinking of being comfy with a scarf you're not thinking of it being dark all the time i'm one of those people though who loves the winter but i do hear you but the reason i love the winter is because i uh sweat the second that it uh drops this a drop above 70 degrees fahrenheit and i'm sweating and so like that's more of like a personal discomfort that i'm like not in during the winter uh but i'm also not in a place where it gets like truly truly cold but uh yeah that's super valid i mean like uh what is it like seasonal

effectiveness disorder yeah and i don't it's i always have kind of a little hesitancy with whenever it comes to like um categorizing depression right like here's the reason and i found it and i can fix it i can't fix it it's it's you know way more contributing factors and there are real things like specific things that i'm i'm wrestling with but at the same time i just uh actually thanks for pushing pushing back on that because i don't i think maybe it just is me being unnecessarily insecure about it well i don't well i just want to validate that like you're allowed to feel like that um and but also this is a safe it's like our show is very come as you are and no one's holding you to any standard other than, you know, maybe what you're holding yourself to because we got the whole team here and everybody's like, that's true.

Oh my gosh, we're just showing up here. We're hanging out because I feel terrible. I'm very tired and I don't know why uh it doesn't even matter how hard i try keep that in mind i designed this round to explain in due time but no the um and i feel this way often lately and i'm also like dealing with like depression and et cetera. Depression plus coming to training services. You go to family. But it's a thing where I'm just like, we just have to like do sometimes.

And I think it's like totally okay. Like we, and our audience understands this. Like there's no necessity to be our most authentic selves because at the end of the day our show dips into a degree of vulnerability that can sometimes be very like emotionally taxing and so like on a day-to-day basis it's like maybe we can't always offer that don't always have have it to give i definitely you know feel that some days more than others especially if we're spending time at time off the show ruminating. Sure.

Yeah, absolutely. We roll up. We got the... We rolled heavy today. We rolled heavy today. We brought the whole crew. Four of six. Four of six.

We outnumber you by 200%. Okay. Jacob, do not let me showcase my training. Yeah, not only a threat, but a mathematical fact as well. I like that. Jacob, you can friggin' catch me with the Hubble telescope, brother. Teleport directly behind you, and then your head would fly off a big spot of blood. Jordan, do you have one of those UV lamps?

No. I just got one, and I love it. My psychiatrist did tell me to do that and so i shoved him i said you're a damn quack well so your quack is right because don't talk about him like that leave kyle alone daffy ducks therapist be like no i i do or like when it's sunny out just go sit outside for like a few minutes and it is so weird how much it helps like it almost creeps me out a little bit it makes me feel like a little animal it's like yeah we've talked about it before that like if you go out even for a walk and you're like fuck it helped i know that's kind of where i've been lately where i need to go on a single walk and i'll

probably it'll probably do wonders for like the next several days but uh we had we all went to dinner last night and it was i i gotta tell you i was taken off the i had a weighted vest of depression on it right before i know i will feel better if i do it yeah yeah listen to him this theoretical future listen to the quack yeah do it for him do it for i i i definitely yeah i definitely relate to that i had a uh conversation with a therapist uh recently basically about how like i know like i found myself engaging in these habits that are not productive for me. Like, and I don't want to go into specifics because I don't want to rehash my

actual therapy, but I'm engaging in these habits. And I know that to get myself back. And we talked about this before on the show, but like to get myself back on the train of healthy habits, all I need to do probably is like go on a walk and that'll like set in motion like some momentum that i can kind of ride to valhalla uh aka uh having slightly healthier habits and um but sometimes that like the the start is the toughest part. And, uh, and it's hard not to be like mean to myself about,

oh, it's so simple. Just do the thing. And, uh, but just like, I'm trying, I've been trying to like practice, like being kinder to myself about that and kind of like holding space for the time it takes to like, kind of get myself back on the horse, um, rather than, uh, being, being too self-critical. Cause at the end of the day, that doesn't like help me get on the horse any faster. It just makes me feel worse in the interim. It would be a very poor service to someone else that was struggling. Yeah. If you have a, if you were to tell me like yeah my friend uh reached out to me he said he's really kind of struggling his rhythm is off he's disappointed in himself and so i gave him the advice of just fucking do it right i'm being so lazy just like be more of a uh rise and grind

brother kind of actually have six days in one day yeah i have six days in one day you've got it sometimes you just got to push through i don't it's like everybody's different and so like that's why some of that stuff you know doesn't apply to people because not everybody's fighting the same demons when it comes to pushing through you know and the solution has never been pushing through yeah because it i've we've been down and then up again and the solution has never been pushing through yeah because it i've we've been down and then up again and the solution has never been exclusively willpower right right but there are like bouts of like you know taking on the battles like taking on a boss battle that like you're like okay i think i i think i've got the right build for this i obviously i could go level up but i don't want

to be over leveled for the battle i think i I've got an 80% chance of doing this. And that could be an example of like going to dinner last night where it's like, okay, I've got this weighted vest on. I don't know if I can kind of trudge through this extra weight to get to the place where i could take it off and actually feel like a little bit lighter but um i'm gonna try and i think that that's all you really can offer yourself is like especially when the stakes are like what's worst case scenario a respawn dragon yeah this dinner if i wasn't feeling it does not then impact what could impact my following day is dwelling at that well that's not just could definitely will guaranteed right yeah the dwell the um the i i've done a bad and now i'm gonna like sit and fester on that is like

the the one-two punch of like depression where it's the vicious cycle and you kind of can't i mean you can and i will uh but but it's like that's the really risky thing you don't want to like feed because then it becomes a cycle of i let everybody down and now i'm sad that i let everyone down and as a result i am gonna continue to let everybody down and then be sad about letting everyone down my b my b except not my b i know's not. Except my B. Actually, it is my bad. And actually, it's more bad than before. It's my A, B, and C. Yeah, my alphabet, man.

My alphabet. Shit, dude. I have a children's book, but it's like A is for anxiety. B is for my bad. My bad. C is for crap. Yeah, B is for bad. My.

But B is for bad. Jordan. Bad Jordan. Let's be honest. What most people want for the holidays is to see their favorite people more often. That's why this year, the best gift you can give outside of plane tickets is an Aura digital picture frame. Named the number one digital photo frame by Wirecutter, Aura frames are incredibly smart and incredibly easy to use and allow you to upload unlimited

videos and photos directly from your phone to the frame. Plus you can order the frame online and preload it with whatever photos you want directly from the Aura Frames app so it's ready to go right out of the box. Obviously we have frames of our favorite people here oh this is yours whoops I can swipe through them um to get to more favorite photos of myself obviously these are who's that the Rizzler and one cool feature is that it automatically turns off when the room is dark so you don't have to worry about it being a night an unwanted nightlight are you sleeping sleeping well champ maybe you're sleeping in France. Aww. It's me.

I want that. Actually, I'm going to put this somewhere special. Hold it. Save on the perfect gift by visiting AuraFrames.com to get $35 off Aura's best-selling Carver map frames by using promo code SADBOYS at checkout. That's A-U-R-A-Frames.com, promo code SADBOYS. This deal is exclusive to listeners, so get yours now in time for the holidays. Terms and conditions apply. But, yeah, so it's like I am a little bit of loneliness, a little bit of disregard.

Sorry, just got a lot of Linkin Park lyrics on the brain. Emo. You're in an emo mindset. But my Spotify wrapped, no Linkin Park, so where is it coming from why is it in my head oh you're trying to get it next year yeah i'm by saying it out loud i'm shooting for the music next year i'm trying to set myself a 0.5 of the the primary listeners i mean you know rising grind but yeah like i don't even know what i was talking about but i'm um i'm kind of i'm hoping that i'm before i'm like right before the the rise again you know before the dark knight rises oh shit and um because arkham needs me yeah that's true we both i've been letting down metropolis and you've

been fucking up uh gotham all the better yeahin you have not done anything uh in the flash of it i don't know what you're talking about i'm i got this warm salty breeze on me it's hard to be sad when i'm on the ocean fishing oh yeah we should yeah we should mention uh there's been a flood at a direct line behind the camera i just realized you're wearing like uh pants that look like that look like you are fishing i can can't even see his legs. I'm dressed for the job I want. Dressed for the job you want. Duck Dynasty. Austin, who's Canadian, is enjoying the weather that is not cold right now.

Where are you with? I mean, also, I'm literally fishing right now. Yeah, I have Austin playing old school runescape for me. Because I... There's a league happening right now. I decided, I consulted, I consulted my team,

texting a few friends. And I decided that I'm going to, I'm going to dip my hat into the ring, AKA logging into RuneScape for the first time in three years. And we've got the, the bencher. And then of course like of course now that i'm playing runescape there's no xp waste no no time can be spent not gaining

experience um so uh i have austin fishing shark uh while i'm fishing for snark on my podcast yeah and we're we're let me tell you big catch yeah huge success so far 99 snark over there I'm a golden god and you're a guy named Rob you are the most fisherman coded you're most angler-y of the yeah you're the angler of the group of the room yeah I would say I would agree with that

look at Jacob look at his hat Jacob's hat versus Austin's pants this is like a immovable object versus an unstoppable force. Actually, Jacob might be fishing. You're duck hunting. You're unsuccessfully duck hunting.

You do kind of look like any man that I would see in Missouri this time of year. You look like you'd get shot by Dick Cheney. I look like I'm carrying a shotgun in the woods. You look like a man in Missouri and we look like two men in misery. Yeah. So maybe somebody i don't know welcome to sad boys is that new oh i mean before we move on if we're a bit of levity

peeps you gotta tell everyone your joke because i have a really good joke to tell everyone now i don't want to i don't want to over set up. I don't want to front porch this too much. You are going to die laughing. You are going to blow up. You're going to laugh because you also texted it to pretty much laugh me.

If you don't laugh, you're going to get blown up. And let me tell you, again, not to set it up too much, you messaged it to most members of your family and they did not like it very much

they did not appreciate well they don't appreciate comedy god it's so funny I'm a comedy enjoyer I think you're chucklesome yeah so came up with it myself last night you said that a few times it's making me think that you didn't come up with it yourself

it was my original joke and idea. Okay. I believe you. Why did the tricycle fall over? Why did the tricycle fall over? It's so good. Wait, I got to think. Yeah, I guess I don't have to think.

Why? It was too tired. Oh, so it wasn't a tricycle. It was a bicycle. No, it was a tricycle. Wouldn't it be three tires? No, the tricycle was two tires.

Oh, so it fell over because it only had two tires. No, it was a tricycle. It has three tires. But it was too tired. Maybe one was a wheel with no tires. One was a wheel with no tires. I do think it would be able to stabilize itself.

But it was a little tiny wheel. It was a little tiny wheel. I guess technically... It just stabilizes on a bike. Yeah. Wait, wouldn't it be a bicycle if it was too tired? That's what I was saying. See, you're not hearing me right, though.

What you don't understand is it was too tired. What you don't get is that the tricycle was too tired. Oh! What? Wait, but it can't... No, I never said that it has two tires. I'm saying that it was too tired. I didn't understand that we were...

So it has a brain. Well, okay. Something I do want to highlight is that this is... Most people that you told this joke to, it was over text. And this joke cannot operate in the written form. I don't think it can operate in the spoken form. I think it works spoken and written. Yeah, because it means the same.

I say the same thing, spoken or written. Oh, I understood it perfectly. The issue is that it is, by definition, is not. Why did the bicycle fall over? That's someone else's joke. I can't just steal a joke. Oh, it's someone else's joke. So that's the foundation of the joke.

So the joke made sense if it was a different person's joke with a different premise. So when you say you wrote it. Because you could scale this up. You could just do what did the car fall over. Because it has two tires. I have to say that I'm a little bit worried for you that i think you're following down uh a dangerous path similar to jordan's yeah this is i could see where this could lead to your comedy style just being lying wait no but that

wasn't a lie that That was just a joke. But it sounds like a joke that Jordan would really enjoy. I do think Jordan's a bad influence on you. I think Jordan's a terrible influence. This is an intervention. We talked about this last night at dinner, which also was at a really great restaurant that everyone loved that had carolers.

It had two sets of carolers with the first group i was too caught up in like what should i be doing with myself while they're standing by our table and i saw that anastasia was recording and so i was trying to like act natural and it didn't work i was like nodding my head too much during the first group we started getting into a little dance and then i i realized that it looked unnatural what would i want is you know what i mean if i'm caroling professionally table to table i'd probably want to not be in that situation yeah i think that like i immediately because i think that one thing about caroling that we don't talk about enough is consent and i think that if if you are consenting to be sung at then then it's your responsibility to hold up your end of the bargain from a nodding and smiling

it should be like a trick or treat and the trick is them singing at you but you can give them cash to go away but i but i do feel like if you walk up to the group and say what song do you want your answer is not no song go away i was gonna say like they did they went up to every single table which was a lot of tables at the time they were awful every single table and got a requested song from each of them and so at that point we were one of the last and i feel like we couldn't just be like no we're good it took two tables for it to sink in what was happening for me i went like oh i thought this was, maybe it was someone's birthday. That's what I thought originally. I was like, oh, this is a birthday thing.

Okay, so this is when I need to make amends to you all because I knew. You were not forgiven. Well, I made the reservation. I chose the restaurant. It was a great restaurant. It was very good. I saw on the website when I made the reservation that it said, starting December 1st, we will have carolers at dinner.

And I thought, oh, how fun. We regret to inform you that we will have carolers. The thing is, I learned in that moment that there's a lot more variables to just caroling, right? Because if there's carolers and they're away from me, like, for example, if they were, were like out in front of all the tables and just doing a series of songs yeah totally fine no problem with that non-diegetic it's the background for us it's the fact that it was a group of carolers that went up to every table and asked them specifically what song do you want yeah

uh i didn't know that i had to be a participant i didn't know that i had to be a partial dj to the set list that night and they didn't know any kendrick which was bothersome to me yeah uh i i do think though that my my entire vibe changed when the second group came and i felt like i could have a beer with them yeah you know what i mean cool. They were nicer and I liked their sound better. I did like that the other group had an old Italian man. They also were all wearing period costumes but also Christmas

like Victorian Christmas. Like Scrooge McDuck level costuming. Or like just regular Scrooge from A Christmas Story. Specifically the duck.mas carol there we go well that's where they got the idea for a christmas tale i feel like hasn't there been more caroling in history now net time spent calorie calorie low carols there has been more

time spent caroling by people in period costume in the 2000s onwards than there ever was in the period they're wearing the costumes from. There's not that many people back then. How many? I just don't know how common caroling was back then. Why do we associate it with that? You know that song about wassailing? No.

No, I do not. I mean, no, of course not. Did you think we would? No. What part of you thought that any of us would know that? Doesn't wassail, I don't know what wassailing means, but I think it means caroling, right? It's a side or something. Jekyll.

Hey, Jekyll. Jekyll Scudo. Wassailing is a winter tradition that involves singing, dancing, drinking, and merrymaking. Okay, that's a fun verb. Merrymaking in orchards to ensure a good harvest. It comes from the old Norse word for good health. Did the harvest have already happened in winter? Wassling is still a Twelfth Night tradition practiced throughout Britain in areas where fruit orchards, particularly apple and pear, are grown.

Good news to me. I grew up in that. There are no songs in my life. This is what you've got to keep away from the British. What's the Twelfth Night? It's the play by Shakespeare. Anytime you go, they wassail. I think it's also like...

Christian Festival on the last night of the 12 Days of Christmas. I didn't know there was a DLC to the 12 Days of Christmas. Oh, you didn't play this season? have you guys seen that thing that someone calculated like how many birds you receive after singing the 12 Days of Christmas by the way not hard to calculate it you just add the numbers together

it's basically a rhythm of things it was a child scientists have finally figured out oh numbers that is I don't know do you know the number though I haven't it's like 144 birds

that's very funny I'll pass I don't want to you're crazy I have to look after these things every year yeah don't gift people animals

yeah a goldfish is too much yeah I did have a I had a nightmare a few weeks ago that I gave a friend

too big of a dog I like gifted them a huge dog not that you gave them a dog big of a dog. I like gifted them a huge dog. Not that you gave them a dog. Like Clifford. Oh, wow. Just fucking enormous. Very big dog.

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Well. Because the name of the dish. With reverence and kindness, yes. So. Politely. So, I ordered the most British sounding entree I've ever heard. Dinner.

Supper. Dinner. Supper. It was called Toad in the Hole or A Hole. No, The Hole. Okay. Yeah, it's called Toad in the Hole and looking at the pictures here, it does not look like that to us. Yes. I was somewhat bothered. I was bothered. That looked like

Wait, hold on. Can we go back? It's sausages. That looks like someone went, oops. I dropped sausage in my cheese pizza. That's Boston style. British style. So what was yours? Chunks of meat? It was like a beef stew.

Ours was like beef stew on the top. Which does not, a Yorkshire pudding does not have the constitution to handle that much liquid for that long. A Yorkshire pudding is a giant bread bowl essentially except it's in this case It's a giant holy bread bowl not like religious but like it was full of air. But it made me religious

the taste, the freshness. It was as big it was also it was as long it was bigger than peeps. Yes, that's true. It was about the size of your head.

Peeps could fit in the bowl. You had a nap. I ate maybe like a fourth of it and I was like guys I can't do this anymore. Peeps could fit in the bowl. You had a nap. I ate maybe like a fourth of it, and I was like, guys, I can't do this anymore. Peeps in the hole is a different holiday delicacy. Oh, dude. If you fell down a well, I would not go down.

I was making eye contact with Jordan when he ordered to the server, to go in the hole, and he did make a raise eyebrows. I ordered it based on name alone, and I don't feel like, based on the fact that when you Google it, it doesn't look anything like what we ate. This is, I was shocked when it arrived, because, oh, you know what it probably was?

It was probably an Irish version. Or Scottish. Wait, before we, hold on, before we scroll away, Jacob, can you go back? I just want to look at this disgusting plate of peas and like half a hole Okay, first of all

the greatest delicacy at the pub opposite the house I grew up at I've got no problem with peas I just feel like the plating on this is horrible. It looks like me bedriding on a couch You need carrots Let's say something happened to you

well i'm like i i'm bed riding next to an apple tree and all the apples have fallen onto the this is called jarvin the hole that is his bed yeah they should have like an additional piece of yorkshire pudding that's the tv and i haven't changed the channel because i don't have the energy to reach the remote right there's like a tv remote is the only thing missing from the plate um i would love if we could take a team trip to jordan's hometown someday and do a little tour of the cuisine they would love some of you could you google like toad in the hole beef yeah also before somebody gets fussy in the comments a normal yorkshire pudding is smaller than the one they use for toad in the hole relax you already left the comment but they but but it is like it's on the wikipedia page for

toad in the hole that it's yorkshire pudding so they can just shut the hell up well also jacob got a smaller yorkshire pudding on the side of his... Yeah. Little crunchy. We'll say that. Bit crunchy. Too crunchy. They made it that crunchy to hold all the toad. Oh, that's right. See, if the hole were bigger...

If the hole were bigger, we would all get lost inside of it. It was a very large hole. We already lost it in two. No one take this out of context. We're talking about British delicacies.

Oh. Okay. There's so many British foods that sound naughty. Like spotted dick. Mind trouble. Oh, okay. There's so many British foods that sound naughty. Like spotted dick. Mind trouble. Like spotted dick. Spotted dick. Spotted dick, yeah. Have you? Or about.

That comes in a can. Oh, it's one of Jacob's tabs. Would you want to share the video that I took of you two? Or no? Yeah. Let's watch it right now and react. It's you guys saying Toad in the hole. And then me doing my cinematography.

Yeah, that way people can see. You are a gimbal. Oh, wait, no. First, can we listen to Indie Sleaze Power? Go back to your Spotify. Can we listen to Indie Sleaze Power Valid Wednesday morning? What the hell is that?

What have we got on here? Oh, this is like their day list. I hate the words that Spotify uses to describe playlists in music genres. I don't know. I know it's probably not like the most commonly used app, but like Partiful is an app that gets used a decent amount with an extended friend group for organizing events and stuff.

It is achingly old tech copy. There's a poke. It's called like a boink or something. Every time you accept something, it's like a boink or something every time you accept something it's like um this sigma's about to go party mode that's actually cool that's how i was gonna say i'm i'm on team austin here actually wait oh i'm cool too do you guys like me also no no let's heaps just got a bitter angst playlist bitter angst wednesday afternoon and it says here's some bitter angst, rage, mystical, goblin core, and cleric music.

Fuck off. Goblin core? You're 35. Cassandra. Kind of fitting for me. Yeah, unfortunately it's correct. You are goblin core. I mean, my day list just says cold, fresh Wednesday afternoon.

Wait, where do I find this? You are cold, fresh. Do you go to Spotify and search day list? Daylist? Mine's going to be like some basic ass bullshit. Mine's going to be about the baldest face. Here's some mustard. Here's some bullshit, idiot. That's crazy.

It's crazy how my phone doesn't work. Okay, here we go. Mine says I'm ugly. Daylist? Yeah, just search Daylist and it'll be the first one. Fighter of the Nightlist? Okay. That's just for one time. Yeah, mine just says angry rock radio afternoon. Angry rock. What the fuck is that?

And it's a fallout boy song. They're not angry. They're depressed. Uppity. My school. Uppity. Rude. Back of the bus.

Beat. Okay. Mine is racist. Wait. Yeah. No. Listen to this. Angry rock.

Okay. Anastasia says, let me read it. Anastasia says, 80s soft rock, blue eyed soul. Wednesdays. Wait, isn't blue eyed soul a thing? It is a thing, but isn't that kind of, we don't want that. Is blue eyed soul like when they're like white people do it better? No, it's like white people stealing black.

Right, right, right. They're like, I see you're white people and I music. Right, right, right. They're like, I see your white people and I raise you blue-eyed, which is better. We're just going to take some jazz. Not scary version. I want to read the artists in my angry rock radio, by the way. Fall Out Boy, Mike Shinoda. Oh, angry. Paramore.

Oh, too scary. Hozierosier angry so very angry yeah he's so angry some 41 okay that one tracks they do seem angry in their music uh yeah what i think the most unhinged one that i have seen so far um curtis tweeted it um and it's July was your coastal grandmother finger style yacht rock season grandma finger style that sounds like some Candyland shit wait let me look at my Lord licorice spindle wapple Thursday oh yeah

I had a and I don't know why because I don't know the song that is playing right now I've never heard before in my life. They said June was, here we go. Achingly slow. Insane how long it takes. Here we go. Yeah, wow.

This is just too much. Why the animation? June was your indie sleaze strut soundtrack. Yeah. What? You don't remember June? That's true. You were strutting a lot.

It was my indie sleaze. You were a fucking sleaze. I have the most boring day list, by the way. Chill hip-hop collaboration afternoon. That sounds like a mistranslation of anti-pop or something. Right. Chill hip-hop collaboration afternoon. Oh, I love musical sounds.

I just can't get enough of music sound based music. I'm a human, by the way. Ah, a delicious sustenance. Yummy. Can you pass the food? I do love food. Oh, man. Oh, we also had, I think they called it scotch rare bit.

I think normally it's Welsh, right? It's usually Welsh rare bit i think normally it's welsh right it's usually welsh but yeah but it's just uh uh less spiced up queso it is honky queso you can say it i had well i had something that was blue-eyed it was called like it was called brisket burnt ends right yeah and it was like it was like meat i i feel like if it's a burnt end it shouldn't be like medium cubes of beef but it was like all of the meat was like not burnt

it felt like it should have been charred right it didn't even feel charred it just felt like barbecue beef I was more expecting it to be like jerky almost or even like when you like the edges the burnt edges yeah like burnt that being said we had a great time Or even like when you, like the edges, the burnt edges of like a. Yeah.

Yeah, like burnt. That being said, we had a great time. Yeah, it was great. Food was great. Yeah, I mean, it was like almost there, but not quite. It was like a little too. It was just a liar's menu. Yeah. It was just full of lies.

We've got something on our topic board that every time I ask about, Jacob and Anastasia chuckle a little bit and they say no no no we'll tell you on the show and i want to know save it for the little finger wiggle their little finger and i'm like what is it and so allegedly apparently there's a list of interesting sports that we are gonna now create a tier list out of with and boy i'm looking at some of these names and they truly are either they either make no sense or sound completely impossible we should try to guess what they are too oh that's fun you greasy pole all right wait so so maybe spotted dick yeah hi hi greasy pole is also british yeah yeah is it Is it a sport or is it a British food?

It's a wet banger. The first sport we have is Extreme Simon Says. Hell yeah. Brought to us by Red Bull. Okay. This happened at Ludwig's. Yeah, I think I might have seen it. Okay, Red Bull loves shit like this.

Yeah. I would love to be on their partnerships team. She's like, what do we got? What do we got? Yeah. of shit like this yeah um i would love to be on that partnerships team she's like what do we got what do we go yeah i went i've gone to well a couple years ago i went to a couple of random ass like events that red bull like brought me to what one of them was like a crypto conference but it was a different time back then like a sport i thought you were gonna say a crypto competition no crypto was like it was a kind of new ish back then who can scam the most fans within a week yeah but it was it was in um

Zurich so I was like sure I'll go to Zurich I'll open a second bank account I'll take a haven and someone commented uh somewhere in here like this is the safest sport Red Bull's ever promoted that and crypto

they do a lot of extreme they do i mean they sponsor like uh they sponsored the the jump from the atmosphere from the that's right yeah um gosh i think i would probably i'm so timid my heart is so timid if i was on the red bull team my suggestions would be like oh what about like a nice walk yeah what about a big you have to jump up who can jump the most well elon would win that one yeah yeah make an x as quick as you can with your body oh who can sing the uh say usa wrong usa usa you usa so okay let's let's see a little example of this one obviously this was this one's pretty self-explanatory. Hands up, hands up, summits his hands up. Hands down, hands down, summits his hands down. They're good.

Summits his lean forward. Good boy. Summits his hands up, summits his hands down. Hands up, summits his hands up. Hands down, summits his hands down. Run in place, run in place. Jesus. Summits his stop, hands up, summits his hands up.

Wave it around, wave it around, summits his wave. Summits his stop, wave it around, wave it around. Summits his wave, summits his run. Summ Simon says stop, wave it around, wave it around, Simon says wave, Simon says run, Simon says stop. Hands down. Do you think he was improvising or going off a script? Wait, can you go to the reply where they say the girl is mad impressive, right there? No, no, no, you just scroll past it, you were on it.

Was it further down than this? The girl is mad, I was just thinking maybe they'd say her name. Okay. Well, I wish we could. I don't know. Maybe I'll be able to find it. Yeah.

Anyway, I'm pretty impressed with the orator, the Simon. I know. Why doesn't he get... First of of all stop talking about yourself the third person simon i say i'm impressed with simon me well if he said uh if he said if he said i if he spoke in the first person he would sound like falcorn leghorn i said stand up i say sit down sit down i said now i said no no no i did not say i'll say now i say now, now, I did not say I'll say. Now, I'll say, now, now, listen here. Let's just do people standing still while he says all this. Simon says, I'll put that in B tier.

Yeah, I like, I mean, I will say, no way I could do that. I can't do that. No way. My brain shrinks. I couldn't be any of the people involved. I couldn't be the audience. Do you know how many they started with? No.

Because imagine being the first one out. That would feel so bad. And your name's Simon? It'd be like Squid Game when you get shot. Oh, yeah. Dude, if I was in Squid Game and I got my head blown off in the first round, I would be so embarrassed. Yeah, exactly.

I would be in heaven talking to Joe Rogan being like, you're not going to believe how I ended up here. Fear is a factor for me fear is embarrassing myself in front of tons of people I gave everybody the ick and Joe Rogan was like I don't speak Korean man I have no idea what you're saying

does anybody have subtitles for me can I listen to the dub please our next interesting sport is reindeer skiing oh wait now is the which are the reindeers on skis interesting sport is reindeer skiing. Oh, wait now. Is the... Which individual? Are the reindeers on skis, I think, is the main question.

I think the answer is no. Oh, that is so cute. So instead, you're on skis and a reindeer's in front of you, so it's like a... It's just sledding, right? It's like a sledding thing, except for you are the sled. What is it?

Where they race with the dogs in Alaska? Yeah, that's a... Iditarod? Like the Iditarod, yeah. Whoa, that's what it's called? But they're on a sled, too, not just... That's sled. Yeah. That's a...

You guys all knew the name. I was like, dog sledding? That was amazing. Come on, guys. I thought it was just called dog sledding. I've just seen the Cuba Gooding movie. Cuba Gooding movie. Cuba Gooding. I've seen the Cuba Gooding movie. Cuba Gooding movie. I've seen the Cuba Gooding Jr. movie, Snow Dogs.

But I think Iditarod is a very specific race. Yeah, it's like the Grand Prix of like... It's boy-boy's friend. Oh, so that's the name of the race. Iditarod. That's funny. All right, you got one today. I'm done.

Where's Roe for Nip where's rovin freedom of jail clips inserted of babies being born same time the man has murdered the beginning and end oh that looks dangerous that's oh that's what reindeer look like where's it oh they've got rains god i christmas propaganda has messed me up so wait i'm just realizing It's a pretty short race It's a reindeer named for the rains? So it's just a deer? If it's wild, it's just a deer? Well, but it's not just a deer Because it's like a

It's a very specific It's a specific type of deer in a specific type of climate Oh, but it's named after its utility? That's rude Well, we often, we do that a lot No, maybe it's like a king's rain Like it rains over other deer They're so cute, I love them It looks kind of like a king's rain. Like it rains over other deer. They're so cute.

I love them. It looks kind of like a hippo. Yeah, it's a little stubby. Yeah, what? Are they trimming his horns? Or is that just Christmas propaganda that I believe from Santa? A famous liar. I feel compelled.

They do trim their horns, it looks like. It looks like they have little nubs. By the way, the hands up looks like they're going, oh, no, my reindeer. Wait, go back. Oh my reindeer is loose it's gonna fly away it just starts lifting up i love that it's tugged though it looks like it oh i feel compelled as a lover of animals to say as a former sled rac. I don't like any sport that involves animals. That's fair. You know what?

The reindeer doesn't want to do this. I'm not going to fight you on that point. Tell you what I can get on board with, or could if it weren't for the fact that the industry is notoriously full of bad people, is greyhound racing. Because they do love running oh they love running but they don't love is they then get murdered yes that's the that's bad what's up with the do you reckon

you have the exact uh bill to be a jockey like a like a jockey that's on a horse because it's like a size and weight thing right like it's i don't know what the build is. I would say just from having seen a jockey or two. Of course you have, by the way. At work? When did you see? When you worked out of bookies. That you do. Oh.

Can I just point out that, Jacob, did you make this? I'm going to be a jockey. You picked up the cutest reindeer sledding I just looked up reindeer skiing and it gave me photos of reindeer skiing that's way more wholesome by the way than what we actually witnessed so that image gets an

S tier but the actual sport I think gets a C or D for me and I'll say also very very short race that's what I was saying weirdly short race I feel like they don was saying. Weirdly short race. I feel like they don't have time. If it weren't for like, you know, don't make the animals do that, it would get an immediate S tier for me because they're my favorite animal.

Cute. The reindeer is? Deer. Yeah, just deer in general. Pick one. Pick between the two. Yeah, you got to pick. You can't just say deer.

No, it's the, what are they called? Fallow deer. Fallow. What's the next sport? Our sport hey sport is hobby horsing hobby okay we're finally at hobby horsing all right i kept asking i asked anastasia i asked jacob i asked anyone who would listen what is hobby horsing why do we keep saying and i said none yeah you said none yeah and then i googled it and and uh i found out you were making a joke and making fun of me i said oh it's maybe maybe none yeah we'll explain it and then i find out that's short for none yeah business now egg on my face i look like a fool why would you say that to him i say it to him all the time yeah a lot of stuff

in this business i suppose let's watch's watch. Finnish dressage championships. It's always them, isn't it? Dressage. So dressage is actually a sport that you do on a horse. A real horse. But this is the hobby horse. If you don't have a horse, it's just dancing. Dressage?

Dressage is a sport you do on a horse. That's like where the horse dances. No. Should we just watch some dressage real quick? I used to work at dressage events serving PIMS to posh people. What? And then I would say stuff and they'd go, what's happening? Dressage horses for sale?

Why did that be autocomplete? The best dressage horses in the world. This is Jacob's Google, so he probably looks for dressage horses. I cannot ride this top dressage horse. Oh, look at that guy. What is this world? Elphic event ponies. Welcome back to my pony

YouTube channel. Today we're talking about the pony that I cannot ride. Okay. Okay, this man is dressed like he's in the wrong time period. We were told that he would show something dramatic. Here we go. Here we go.

We were told that the horse was going to do something cool. Perhaps a backflip. Is this the cool thing? It's going to be dramatic to start your test off with a double canter pirouette. This has to be the most British thing of all time. It looks like the horse is skipping. No, if this was a British sport, it would involve some kind of horrific animal torture. I mean, this might be would involve some kind of horrific animal torture. I mean,

this might be... This does kind of... Literally, at one point, it was a British sport of, I believe, fox throwing. Oh my god. It's all stuff like that. It's all like bear punting and things like that. It just looks like it's limping. But he's doing it on purpose.

He's doing it for the beard.ping Wait so this is dressage This is like the top level of it is the horses doing a little We shouldn't have this great actually we know it was it's a little skip the horse is doing a little skip It's oh, it's doing a little cross Not like us skip. The horse is doing a little skip. Oh, it's doing a little cross. Doing a little cross. Not like us. He has to keep the positioning and the bend in that cross. Oh my god. Okay, so now you have an idea

what dressage is. I can't believe that... Okay. So now hobby horse dressage. Okay. So it's... I mean, I have a... I have some theories. Oh, the reveal. This is way better, by the way.

This is so much cooler. How did that work? That's tiring. Well, and no animal was harmed. Well, except for the horse that's been beheaded. Yeah, the poor little pony. So Hobby Horsing is essentially doing equestrian sports with a prop horse. And you are the horse.

I'm in favor of this because the horse sports make me uncomfortable. But this reminds me of Quidditch. Oh, it does, yeah. This is kind of like the impossible burger of horse dressage. It's like they had to make some compromises to make it vegetarian. Can you now back up 10 seconds or whatever hit the left arrow

and then hit forward. I have to tell you to pause at a specific moment. Whoa. Okay. That's pretty sad. Actually, I just

want to analyze the form. Okay. We're approaching. We're approaching. Keep going. Keep going. We're approaching

and on the left side. Look at how dopey that little horse is. That's a pinata. Also, welcome to the arena. Yeah. I love the arena.

It's the arena. I do think this takes a lot of athletic skill. It does. I could not be so graceful as this performer or athlete. I don't know what you call it. It's like people always, when the Olympics are happening, they'll look at synchronized swimming and be like, I could do that. And I'm like, you don't know how much form that takes. I sent you a TikTok.

Oh, the jumping is wild. Oh, that's scary. That's huge. Maybe for you. That's really cool. Yeah. It's tough because you have a hobby horse. This is like reverse limbo where they keep raising the bar.

That kind of reminds me of my own work because I'm always raising the bar. Yeah, getting better. Oh, my gosh. Oh, yeah, that back kick, getting the knee over that's tough this is i mean it's just like a high jump but you have an inconvenient horse right because you can't do the normal high jump stuff you gotta jump earlier and you gotta jump with a different technique because you can't do the all right i don't mean to critique but i'm british so i have i'm the horse whisperer can you jump back to the last person? They kind of

gave up on the horse aesthetic during the run. They kind of just started running. Yeah. Holding the horse up. You just take the horse out and you hold it up. At some point you become the horse. Oh right. Yeah I noticed that they

bowed at the beginning. I thought the horse was supposed to. Yeah you are kind Yeah, I noticed that they bowed at the beginning. I thought the horse was supposed to. Hopps the... You are kind of the horse in this sport. I'm so ashamed of how short my vertical leap is. I'm so tall. I'm ashamed of your vertical leap, too. There's like a foot between my...

But I can just, you know, put it in the basket. I've got a... I can jump pretty high so at the live show a couple uh fans did say i was shocked to see how tall they are yeah that's the go-to it's the go-to as much as we try to tell people they just don't and we're not even that tall like grant like on the grand scheme of things seven foot one seven foot five yeah do you think it's because of the raw muscle and it's making people think we must be like smaller and denser right right

so that one actually hobby horsing i'm close to an s if i mean let's throw it in s for horse it's very impressive i was nervous because when we first started talking about it i i i you guys talked about in such a cagey way that i thought I was going to witness something horrible. Well, here's the thing. Oh, but I had to know. I think hobby horsing gets a lot of criticism or memeing on because people just think it looks silly. Fair. I mean, sure. I'll take a swig at regulars. It doesn't help that it's popular amongst young girls.

That is where the hate is always going to come from to something it's funny because my cortisol levels were at their highest when i was watching the real horse do the dressage that was stressing me out but but seeing a person do it it feels more like a dance it feels more like a like a ballet yeah and you know i i feel like some people are like, this is silly because it's like a child's toy. But like most sports were at one point for children. No one could afford a horse. This is accessible. It's like, it's so funny because you just don't think about like basketball was invented by a guy who.

A Canadian. Okay. I didn't know the fucking Canada Tourism board was sponsoring today's episode but it's the national basketball but uh uh anyway the inventor of basketball was just like looking for a way to occupy his students times but yeah that is a good point it's like uh there's always those things that like twilight and justin bieber come to mind from my old my own childhood where it's like if teenage girls like this then it must be something that we make fun of and i absolutely participated in that during maybe the beginnings of it like twilight i was always just like oh i'm more a

harry potter guy and that didn't work out for me unfortunately but um the uh yeah you staked your claim and that was unfortunately but i do i do remember just unironically fucking with Justin Bieber's, even his first single one time when he's like a child. Because I think I'm like maybe a year older than him or something. Maybe two. Uh-oh. How old is Justin Bieber? Is he exactly my age?

Do we have the same level of talent, you're saying? No. I'm going to ask you. He's 30. Okay okay yeah so you should ask me well you asked uh so anyway i remember when uh jesse beaver single came out and i was like i messed with this and um but then everybody was like actually it's for girls and i was like oh yeah i know it's bad actually then yeah Yeah, Justin Bieber's gay. Yeah. No, that is true. Oh, no. Oh, no. Yeah.

Ew. What would even, how would that even work? What is that? Where do I find videos related to this, baby? Jacob, like, yeah, Justin Bieber's gay. I'm going to give relationship advice on purpose to straight people. When I married my woman wife. A lot of Canadian mentions today.

Yeah, true. All right, dude. You're like my Greek grandma who would always be like, you know he's Greek. Giannis Antetokounmpo. I had Rolling Stone magazine with Anthony Kiedis on the cover she's like you know he's Greek

I'm like grandma he's got a sock on his dick do not talk to me about this talk to me about the sock do we have any more sports oh yeah we've got more sports sorry not to be a jock but do we got any more sports back there

this is a sports podcast now our next extreme sport i do like that it's extreme it is extreme it's more extreme than oh dear oh yeah this no is this oh no oh that's crazy okay so that's what 50 feet drop this is so sick but it's a parkour adjacent. It's parkour adjacent. It's like feels like skateboarding adjacent because there's a lot of the same like places that you do like a skateboard trick, but there's way more flipping. The boys. I don't know my relation to this person in my family, but someone I'm related to does this at like a world competition level.

Oh, wow. Doesn't this feel like Austin's? It's Austin, but he's like trying to test the waters. I don't know which member of my family. Me. I don't know. Like, there's like this freaking video I made. Like, you can watch that shit. Pogo Palooza. We all admire these athletes. Is this Pogo Palooza?

Wait a second. Why does that guy look so familiar to me? Wait, go back. It's in Austin's family. In the hit play? Yeah. He kind of looks like Mutt. Who is? Oh, I He kind of looks like Mutt. Who is? Oh, I know who he looks like. He looks like, he has the same mouth as, God, what's his name?

That doesn't matter. That's, all right, that one wasn't a trick. That was someone just spinning it around. Pogo police. Nebraska. Nebraska. Have you guys ever p around. Pogo police. Nebraska. Nebraska. Have you guys ever pogo sticked? No.

Yeah. A little bit. It kind of went the same route as anything else I wasn't immediately good at as a child, where my instinct was to go, it's actually bad. Yeah, when something gets extinct like that, we call it going the way of the pogo. I like that this guy's name is Anthony Tone Stobbs. What do you think he did to earn that nickname? It's funny because I was more of like the skateboard version of this.

This is like an alternate universe where pogoing was what skateboarding was. But you just abandoned the... Is that a win? Yeah, I feel like this is funny because if you do a skateboard trick and then you just backflip, like, you don't land on the skateboard. It's like dropping the horse when you're jumping over the hill.

Yeah, you can't drop the... What is it called? The hobby. The hobby. You can't drop... I mean, I drop a lot of hobbies, but... Dalton Smith. Dalton Smith.

Great names. Can I... Wait, I just want to throw out, like, big respect to anybody who like absolutely got clowned on for bringing a pogo stick to the skate park but stuck with it i feel like even the kids who brought like scooters to the skate park made fun of the kids who brought the sticks yeah it's like how a clown makes fun of a mime yeah then you do a rad trick and it's like no one can say shit that person's name is lobster

that's cool wait i need a nickname i okay so my thing is shadow i'm imagining i'm imagining this alternate universe where like skateboarding has thrasher magazine and like pogoing has bouncer magazine bouncy boys whoa that's so sick whoa this now there is the one trick where you just bounce and then do a backflip away from it and I don't know what I think of that

because then it starts to feel like oh Dalton he did it that's the most esports crowd I've ever seen he did say he merged

with his pogo stick they are one no fuck from Hamilton from Hamilton Ontario Canada shut up

ugh okay next sport pogoing I think it's an A for me yeah it's a solid A. You don't want to let them down? Throwing that one trick where they

throw the pogo stick away. I think it's just, yeah, doing it, I'm sure, like the athleticism obviously is appreciated and it's very difficult, but as a sports purist, I like it when you land on the thing. Yeah. I'm sure it's like bad for your knees or something

to do that, but it's bad for your knees or something to do that but it's bad for your knees to land on a skateboard you could say that they're bouncing on it in incredible ways stop just so the greasy pole sport is where you run as far as you can on a greasy pole oh to get the flag oh this thing isn't this isn't this ir Irish? They're in Gloucester, Massachusetts, which is, you know. Close. Yeah, Gloucester, right? They almost appropriated my home. Yeah, that was very close.

Because you're from Gloucester Shire. I'm from Stroud, Gloucestershire. You're from the Shire of Gloucester. Oh, yeah. And I'm still thankful. Oh, my God, it's so greasy. What? Ew, ew, ew, I hate that.

Why is he Shrek? What is it greased up with? Or the Hulk, I guess. L my god, it's so greasy. What? Why is he Shrek? Or the Hulk, I guess. Probably Lard or Crisco or something. Now this doesn't seem fair because the grease is reducing with time. Oh my lord. Oh my lord. Oh my lord. Oh my lord.

Each will try to be the first to cross the slippery pole and grab the flag. Oh, Power Ranger costume. I don't get why they're oh dear cowboys why are they doing that he didn't why are so many yeah this okay so so far greasy pole is giving me like a frat kind of vibe uh but i do like the red power ranger costume um does anybody actually get there wow that guy's going so far respect now this even though injuries are commonplace drowning earn their places local legends okay relax local amongst the pole community i walked i walked the the greasy pole.

Is that the legend, MrBeast? Have you guys ever been to like Highland Games? Where they like throw the big pole? Oh, like the Highlandge. Yeah. I've got to throw a big piece of wood. Oh, where's my wood gone? All right, I threw it.

And they also like run on the like spinning rod the like wait but this one doesn't have as much lard doesn't have as much lard yeah i know that there's not nearly as much lard that's just a pole whoa whoa how do you do that in reverse it's a story about a man who flips out of water who put a flag back and walks his way back i guess somebody does have to put the flag back yeah how do you get out there what if you just ran and then belly i was thinking about that the same thing probably against the rules yeah probably you got to be on two feet or something kind of thing where i feel like i would be like yeah i could do it oh i know for a fact i cannot do it i would struggle to like probably get to gloucester. I would give that a B.

Like right now, I would give it a B. It's a B. The frat bro energy is damaging. I don't like the frat bro energy. It's dinging it. But the pole, perfectly graced it. Our next one you may have heard of. Football.

It's a professional tag. Professional. Oh, I have heard of it. Oh, this shit rules. Oh, this is really fun. Oh, that's cool. I feel like I've... God damn.

Why have I seen... Have I seen this in person? I actually wouldn't be surprised. Look at Assassin's Creed. God damn, dude. This is like hardcore, too. It's cool because, yeah, it's cool because you... It's like it gives you a different outlet for your parkour

skill. Yeah, it has like an all new utility other than just being French. Oh, he's British too. I'm not sure. This feels European to me. Oh, what flag is on the loser? Oh, he's also British. Shit. Well, it's on ESPN, so. I know, but

they, like, it just feels like parkour was more popular. This is resoundingly in the, well, I could do. Oh, no. Providing the other person was also very unathletic. Then I could compete, maybe. Oh, he got him. He fell and he got him.

It wouldn't be running. It would be walking around it. If the other person was slow. Oh, ouch. And he recovered, though. That was incredible. Can I tell you an extreme tag story? Please.

Why do you have one? I ask this question often, but... I had some friends from Page, Arizona, which is a very small town. It's a smaller part of Book, Arizona, which is a very small town. It's a smaller part of Book, Arizona? Yeah. That's the county.

Devin Booker's from there. Oh. So Page is a very small town, and my friends were from there, so we drove there, stayed the night. And overnight, we had two teams. I guess it's like a capture the flag sort of thing. But we had two teams. One team had protected the home base. And the other team was like, you know, trying to get to the home base before they got tagged.

And we did it throughout the entire town. Honestly, one of the most exhilarating, fun nights ever. That really is just the crackerized version of the running of the race. The running of the white people. I actually think that after this episode of Sad Boys, you yourself can listen to one of the most exhilarating nights ever. Because on Patreon.com slash Sad Boys, we're doing our patreon exclusive podcast sad boys nights it's going to be exhilarating on today's episode of sad boys nights we're talking

about the origins of the ninja turtles the jim henson company we're talking about the muppets the difference between the muppets and sesame street uh fraggle rock dark crystal really just going through the jim henson archive and uh we're learning lots no spoilers but this is jordan no okay so that to me well said it worked we'll see you there all right cool well anyway we'll see you there uh which you can get sad boys nights by spending five dollars of your discretionary internet spending don't overdo it don't overdo it uh be responsible be responsible anyway um what's the next where does tag go oh uh tag it's a little it's a little basic a a i'm in a b i'm in a b mode i'll go b mode the thing that i'm nervous about uh Barry B-mode, my worry is that someone's going to jump going for a tag

and they're going to hit a pole. Oh, your concern is the well-being of the competitors. Why aren't they wearing helmets? Why don't they have horses? Honestly, this would be made better by, there we go, but hobby horse tag. So no real horses are harmed. I think horse tag is uh like uh lansing

it's also a town in michigan are there any sports or like games like physical games that you guys do that you get like way too into like mine is laser tag oh that's tracks by the way. What I'm going to say will be the whitest thing I say here. Which is ultimate Frisbee. Oh. You have the haircut of an ultimate guy. I fucking love ultimate Frisbee. Ultimate Frisbee is cool. Sport. Is it wrong for me to just say basketball?

Hiking and seeing a beautiful bird. I used to play a lot of... You might have said the whitest thing, actually. Never mind. No, Joe has already said this. When he goes to the club, he seeing a beautiful bird. I used to, I used to play a lot of... Wait, you might have said the whitest thing, actually, nevermind. No, Joe has already said this, when he goes to the club, he sees beautiful birds. I see my beautiful birds and I got to spread my wings. And I'm looking pretty fly as well. I got to spread, I've got to spread my wings, see? I'm a pervert.

I also used to play a lot of flag football. And sometimes tackle football with no pads at a park. Insane. Insane. Insane thing to do. That's just fighting. Because I've always been like a bigger guy, and I like to be big and strong. And so I like when I run, and then nobody can stop me because I'm so strong.

Yeah, I'm sick of being able to stop me whenever i do anything you know what i mean yeah i remember in middle school we'd play four square every day at recess and we were very serious about it it was like four square is always like the most intense or i don't know what you guys used to call it but in where i'm from we called it red ass which was like all right no no no no why is this the time where you say where i'm from, we called it red ass, which was like... No, no, no. Why is this the time where you say where I'm from instead of being like Canadian, by the way? Canada. Has anyone mentioned Canada? Because I have heard other Canadians

call it different. People call it wall ball. I guess that's like... So the options are wall ball and red ass and you went with red ass. Because that's the opposite side of the guy. Because it's funnier. Why is your ass red at any time during this game? Yeah, the objective.

You get a spanking if you do a bad job. Well, the reason why it was called it was because it's like, I mean, you would throw the ball at the wall, and if you missed it, then your person would have to pick up the ball and try to throw it at you. Oh, we did play that when I was a kid. And the idea was to hit the other person in the ass

and then make it red. But do you have to turn around like a firing squad? Yes. So it's like if the ball goes off the wall, if you fumble the catch on it, you then have to run and touch the wall. If you don't touch the wall in time, but before the ball hits it again, you go and you stand up execution style against the wall. Yeah, I do like that. And the other person had to throw the ball at you. I like whenever.

And try to hit you. I like when there's a sport or like some kind of game in like middle school, elementary school. And I'm like, how do we spice this up? Violence. Yeah. Just hitting all... We had a game called...

It's a game called Bulldog. And you just run at each other. That's the game. You go to... Two of you go to opposite sides. And every time that like... Whoever gets through like joins the other side. Is it like Red Rover but like

Yeah I was thinking about Red Rover. It's that but you just run at each other and whoever doesn't get through gets like conscripted to the other side. Conscripted into the Royal Army. Which makes no sense because you can't win. You just keep going until everyone's on the other side again.

So you keep going? Wait so you run run out, so like jousting almost? Like you just run at each other and try to- Yeah, but you don't tackle them. You just bump into each other and fall over. That sounds so dangerous. Yeah, it was really cool. It's more than double digits number of times kids lost teeth. Alternate names for red ass include butts up, fireball, and chunkus.

What region of Canada is Chunkus? I can't speak on Chunkus. That's Quebec. Le Chunkus? I can't believe that you just said those three things that you said, Jacob. Because one of the options was, what was the... We have an article from Defactor.com. We need to talk about Chunkus. Oh, Butts Up.

Butts Up being where it started. And I was like, there's no way Butts Up is not going to be the funniest thing that Jacob says in the next two seconds. The alternate names are Butts Up, Fireball, and Chunkus. Wait, don't click Butts Up, Butts Ball, Fireball, Ch Buttball. You can't lose that one. Butts up, buttball, fireball, chunkus.

Buttball. They didn't list red ass in this article, but this is what came up when I searched red ass. It redirects from red ass, yeah. Well, then alternatively, they should have red ass in the alternative name. We need to talk about chunkus. Oh, so did you ever encounter any of these other names? No.

It was always either wall or red ass. Oh, my my god look at this photo it's a it's a boy who's dressed oh like a boy he's dressed he's wearing a little sailor uniform this is the most like he's he's in like baggy cargo pants and you can tell that this is like where he feels the most powerful and then also there's a another man off screen uh in a bruno mars cosplay because he's wearing sunglasses indoors and a backwards baseball cap you say man but these are children i guess that's true well after butt bowl it makes men it creates men actually it's like war it's like war very similar yeah and the other boy's weeping by

the way as this all beheaded yeah he's weeping or his head's gone he's ready to receive he's butts up is what's happened yeah he's chunk he is he's butts up in preparation for red ass so go trojans whatever the team that that go Trojans. Thankfully not a racist one. Yeah, the Trojan Chunkuses. Does anyone want to play Trojan Chunkus? Trojan Chunkus. With a javelin? That's like what I tell my doctor I have.

I think I have Chunkus. Bad case of Chunkus. Oh, no. Anyway, let's move on. This is an educational podcast. Our next sport is... Sport. Hockey, but it's underwater.

Oh. And what's its name? It is underwater hockey. Of course. Oh. Utensils. I wish I was this good at swimming. Doing it with...

I will say the only athletic thing I've ever been good at in my life is swimming. And for the life of me, flippers. I just can't do it. Yeah. My feet are long enough. You got like built-in flippers. Yeah,'t do it my feet are long enough you got like built in flippers yeah natural flipper what'd you call me

is the snorkel really necessary yeah you're underwater well you have to see a goggle I could put goggles on why isn't there a team defense I'm confused because everyone's together and I don't I thought hockey had like goalies in another team Why isn't there a team defense? I'm confused because everyone's together.

I thought hockey had goalies in another team. I don't think I'd be able to tell by flip. This looks like find the hockey puck underwater. With your friends. And then swim around with your pals. It does look like it'd be very chaotic. Where's the goal? There's no one to stop the goal where is the goal

it's at the end they did put the ball in a little the pucks sorry you see it was like a little no wonder don't hang on

the local Canadian we don't take credit for this one you don't have any water you only have ice yeah I think this is shirts versus skins. Fully nude. One team has to be fully nude.

That one's okay. So maybe we can listen to it with them speaking about it because without audio, I am truly confused. And maybe they can just say stuff about the sport that makes me go, oh, I get it. It really is the ultimate team sport because there's no puck hog that can just do everything for your team.

Eventually, that person's going to have to... It's funny to just be like, it's really the ultimate team sport and then cut to a knot of human beings underwater. It was just like... Do you ever use to play puck hog? No, I was playing face down ass off. Red butt ass chuck. I was playing face down ass up. Red butt ass chunk.

I was playing... We got no answer to chunkers. Well, that's why we didn't talk about it. No one should. This is a very funny sport and commentary because they're like, well, yeah, not one person can just be the best in your team because they're going to have to breathe eventually.

We've lost a lot of competitors. A lot of the best players stayed underwater too long. There's that Aquaman comic where he gets really good at underwater hockey because he just kind of doesn't have to breathe. He's got to get PEDs. He's the Michael Jordan of, yeah. Michael Jordan didn't have to breathe.

Yeah, well, he doesn't. Telekinesis. Yeah. Do you think you would get kicked out of basketball by using telekinesis? Because Air Bud rules, it's not in the rules. They would make it in the rules and then kick you out. The hell? That's not very competitive.

Underwater hockey. I feel bad because it's like a real sport and people are clearly very passionate about it but I'm giving it a C no pogo I have to say like sometimes sports don't take off because they're hard to watch yeah I was just like

I felt like I was just watching people like being like in a cuddle puddle underwater I was just watching a school of people yeah exactly like wow it looks beautiful underwater basketball Like in a cuddle puddle underwater. I was just watching a school of people. Yeah, exactly. Like, wow, it looks beautiful. Underwater basketball.

Oh, what? No. I was so curious. No. We've got the classic cheese rolls. Okay, I'm not kidding. When we looked at the other thing that was in Gloucester, Gloucester, I was like, oh, that's funny.

If we went to Gloucestershire, it would be cheese rolling. I have done this. Okay, I'm going to need some more explanation. Let's watch. Oh, dear. Oh, dear, that is bad for your body. That's not what cheese does. Where does cheese come into it?

That guy's just running. Here's the thing. You've never rolled cheese, and it shows. I guess they're not showing it here. But essentially, what they do is an administrator of the race goes to the top of this hill and throws a wheel of cheese down the hill. Then all of the participants roll down the hill in a similar fashion to the cheese, and whoever gets to the bottom of the hill first wins the cheese.

It's just crazy that you're all pretending you've never done this. We've all done this, right? This person in C-State... By the way, in C-State, how'd you get to the UK? That guy's just running. Can we hear this accent? I think a lot of people travel to this. That's ridiculous.

Not the ones I used to do when I was pro. That guy's just running, and I don't like him. But he bounces on his butt like I've never seen before. How many people have? 50-50. I don't want to break my bones. Do you like cheese? No.

Okay, what? That's like asking somebody who plays basketball if they like it. Team Canada, shut up. How do you get in there? Get out of here, man Are you a big fan of cheese or what other reason? No, they just seemed like a good idea at the time So hold on The person doing this interview

They're taking the piss, to use a British phrase They are taking the piss Because no one gives a shit about cheese Who's doing the cheese roll That's not why you do the sport They just want to roll that in hell Because no one gives a shit about cheese. Who's doing the cheese roll? That's not when you do the sport. They just want to roll that in hell. Yeah, well, personally, I really did want to get the cheese.

But I lost every single time because I didn't want to get hurt. So I would do a little bit of running, and then I would start rolling with my kind of legs tucked initially. I would bump into a rock or something, and then I would stand up and I would walk to the side crying. There's got to be a gymnast who can just turn themselves into a rock or something. And then I would stand up and I would walk to the side crying. There's got to be a gymnast who can just turn themselves into a wheel. Yeah.

And then just crush this competition. Just doing tumbles all the way down. Yeah. There's them rolling the cheese. Cute. And then everyone goes. I don't like this criticism.

You can describe, it is funny that you can describe this as somebody who just, they just really wanted cheese. Yeah. And then this is how they respond. It's cheese chasing. Watching the people fall is very funny.

Why is there a rugby team at the bottom? They have a rugby team to catch people at the bottom of the hill. That's what they're good at. So they don't run into the crowd or what? Yeah. So they don't get the cheese. So they don't hurt themselves, obviously. This is like Walmart on Bethlehem.

So this is like It sounds like somebody's never won it. I think that's Jordan it went back up I think Jordan's the guy putting the winning scarf the natural cheese scarf Well, I'll see me come over here all year. It makes no sense. Well, I should have come over here during Canadian Thanksgiving. No, you'd go home. It's like, here you go. You forgot your Gryffindor scarf. Watch out, mate. You've only gone and forgot your cheese.

Wait, wait. Is that even real cheese? Or is it just like a cardboard face cheese? It's like Rochester Shire cheese. It's Rochester Shire cheese. Could have done it better myself. Come down to Gloucester. I'll get you a wheel, whatever you fancy.

You need some cheddar? I do actually want some cheddar. A bit of Welsh rabbit. What's he saying? I want to hear the winner. My knee got it. I'm going to get it to her, so she's going to get the cheese. Oh, God.

How was it for you? What the fuck? What the fuck? Oh, yeah. He did this. I show speed. What is how was it for you? What the fuck? What the fuck? Oh yeah, he did this, this last time. I show speed. What is I show speed doing here? That's crazy that they buried that three minutes. That is insane.

They didn't mention it. They didn't even show him doing it. What do you mean I show speed shows up three minutes into this fucking video? He was just unrelatedly running down the hill. And then Jacob just hitting us with the, oh yeah, speed's in this. Yeah, I think he made his own video about it too, but...

Wait, back up, I wanna hear what Speed has to say. One big question, do you like cheese? Yeah, of course I like cheese, but I promised my grandma that I'm gonna get it to her, so she's gonna get the cheese. She's a rat. I'm still, fractured leg, but hey, we still livin'. Yep, we still livin' though.

What was your technique on the way down slight but when i was like i wanted to get up and run but i couldn't because i was too slippery so i just had to keep sliding but i just gotta thank god i want to thank the team we might have lost this time but you know it's about the grind it is very interesting to see him like in this context wait i'm genuinely interested in what he's saying his eyes are following me so i just had to keep sliding but i want to do it again because i know how to win now i went like fourth place my first time with no technique with no videos but yeah i did it though you can have another go yeah

oh he's got a he like hurt himself fractured his leg is that ronaldo said fractured leg but we're still living. He got fourth place at this? Of course he did. Dude's an athlete. It's like all the... Yeah, I constantly will get shorts, which is just essentially fan cams of him

hanging out with gymnasts and being able to almost do the same stuff. Yeah, they'll do something, and then they'll be like, okay, now my turn. And then he does it, and they're like, I am an Olympian.

A generational athlete like when he raced Noah Lyles yeah isn't he trying out for the Olympics like next time he said that he's gonna

I don't know if he's gonna do it for real they wouldn't let him join because he's too good at sport since it's Jordan's culture I'll give that an S

that's an olive bridge to me and the I actually loved it the Brits S for slippy sliding down the hill S for showing speed. Or Swiss cheese.

Yeah, there's a S, baby. I do like that the image is the man holding the wheel of cheese. Honestly, two very British. Cool classic Gloucester cheese. It is good, too. Gloucester cheese. This is making me kind of, I'm very rarely nostalgic for home. This being the thing that made you nostalgic is i'm gonna say it surprisingly reminds me of an era drinking vodka at the park getting yelled

getting yelled at for drinking vodka at the park having my vodka taken away because we were like 15 you'll never catch the cheese wheels and then that's what you called your gang of misfits let's get out of here we try to tum to tumble away. And then you just turn into your transformers, but for a wheel of doom. Roll, boys. But we're on a flat surface. Let's roll out. And then you just all wheel away. We're on a flat surface, so they catch us easily.

Right, you roll very slowly because... All right, we've got just a few more to finish up our interesting sports. This one is camel jumping in Yemen. Now, wait. Camel jumping? Are you jumping over the camels or the camels jumping? That's a great questionel jumping? Are you jumping over the camels or the camels jumping?

That's a great question. I think you're jumping over the camels and I think we're about to see athleticism. One could only comprehend. I think we're about to see speed leap over the entire tour. You want to jump halfway through? Honestly, I got fourth without any trying,

without watching a video. He jumped over five camels. I bet I could win. I do have a broken leg, so my 90-foot vertical would have been much higher. The camels bit both of my feet off, but I was able to do a front flip over the entire nation of Yemen. Did you know that... Oh, here we go. No, no, no.

Here we fucking go. But it's kind of common for camels to bite people's heads off. I would dodge. Off? Off? What do you mean off? I would dodge. Off? Off? What do you mean off? Their mouths are so small. No, they'll just pop you like a bubble. What are you talking about? Off. I swear to God.

I'm not making this up. To God. Because you're going to hell. If you're wrong, you're going to hell. I swear to God, if you make us watch a camel beheading video. Fine, put it on. I've never seen Worldstar. Don't look at videos camel bites owner's head off after being tied up all day the independent well yeah i guess yeah you just don't tie a camel don't do that yeah don't do that off i mean i know that big but that's big

look at that mouth look at that camel mouth what that mouth there and then look at how big the camel's eyes are and then look at how those eyes are looking at that head he could just bite yeah he's like i'm measuring the man who jumps the furnace sorry we gotta get a replay on that that was i want the side view to a landing area positioned behind up to six camels demanding oh he goes off a little ramp, I guess. But still. Damn, no shoes! And he kicks out.

He could have done another one. He was doing, him kicking out was like showing off. That was like him doing a kickflip. Zaid Omar is one of the best jumpers in the South. I did, uh, once when I was a little kid met a guy from Yemen and he said I looked like I was from Yemen, so. Yeah, okay, so there is an up. Oh, one cam.

There is a ramp. There is a ramp. I thought there was multiple camels last time. Well, I think they're two different videos. I was 12 years old when I first started camel jumping with some of my friends. I've been training regularly ever since, and I've improved a lot. Now I can clear five to six camels, and I'm the best among my friends. Five to six camels. And I'm the best among my friends. Five to six camels.

I don't think I could get on a camel. I don't, yeah. That is insane. What? They should be in the Olympics. Right. This is my Spider-Man. They just don't have the opportunity

to like get into it. Next time somebody's like, did you know that Tom Holland did his own stunts for Spider-Man and it's like him doing some like, did you know that Tom Holland did his own stunts for Spider-Man? And it's like him doing some gymnastics, which is seemingly impressive. I'm going to send the most impressive video

I've ever seen. Which is a man saying that now he can jump over five to six camels. This guy should be in the next I'm Going Home or whatever. The big Spider-Movie's called. Spider-Man, I'm Going Home. Spider-Man, I'm Home.

Did he like leapfrog? He kind of free ran. I think this one was'm- Oh. Did he like leapfrog? He kind of, uh, free ran. Woah woah woah, that's- I think this one was, uh, you know, he didn't, he didn't get over it. This, this uh- Oh oh. This, that look though is a Spider-man. He did the Spider-man for a second.

I hope he's okay. The danger of getting injured doing camel jumping. It could bite your head off. You are at risk until you land. If you do not land on the ground correctly, you could really hurt your legs. Camel jumping contests are usually held at local festivals. The woman didn't fricking, like,

just let it on throughout the year. To excel, competitors must be both strong... It's fun to, like, the BBC or whatever is trying to embellish it with a little flavour when the sport is jumping over a camel. To succeed at the sport, you need to jump

and it needs to go over the camel. You might think that you're allowed to land before you get to the camel. That would be wrong. A common mistake. An amateur's move.

A common mistake that has cost the lives of many. A thousand, you mean? Yes. One man jumped directly into the camera's

mouth. A rookie mistake. Whoa. This guy's getting reached up. David Attenborough's going to show up doing the narration for this. Where's this going? Oh, S. Oh, S, 100, S+. Like, look at that thumbnail.

Yeah, look at that. What is that? What are you doing you have no respect for the nation my figure couldn't go any further up on the track he's racist i can't i have to leave cheese rolling and dressage i just okay here's the thing though uh i got nervous when the camel was nearly you know landed upon so it kind of does make sense the camels eat people or bite their heads off god does that I got nervous when the camel was nearly, you know, landed upon. It was ironic. So it kind of does make sense that camels eat people or bite their heads off.

God, does that put it in A? But it's so cool. I know, it does include an animal. And the camel, honestly. The camels are like a little bit less involved than, you know, with the reindeer. So that's like the thing. I was going to say that the nice thing is the camels just kind of hang out. Yeah.

But the bad side. Why is it camels? It could just be a wall. It literally could be anything, right? The bad part, though, is that if they're bad at the sport, then they would land on a camel, and that sucks. It's a tricky one to start. It's kind of like being in the Blue Angels or whatever,

where it's like, if you fuck up ever, even once. Yeah, what's the learning curve on that? Like, how do you learn how to do that? I want to know the origin. You get a fake camel that looks like a stuffed animal. They start with a dog. Pommel camel. You jump over a Jack Russell. It all started by jumping over this rock

that looks kind of like a camel. And the guy's chatting, and then the translator's like, I remember the first time I did it, it was by accident. I tripped and tumbled over a camel. And the guy's chatting and then the translator's like, I remember the first time I did it, it was by accident. I tripped and tumbled over a camel. And I thought, what if I'd done it on purpose? Our second to last sport. Okay, I'm excited.

War. Is. Blood sport. Pumpkin kayaking. Whoa! Giant pumpkin regatta. Is this like the flying machine thing where they're just kind of like fun

it's not practical wait now I'm obsessed with like the news anchor introducing a local interest story like it was written by Chad GPT where they just say basic things about humans often gather

and engage in sports. Social animals, known as mammals. It does have a similar vibe to like what, like soapbox racing? Oh yeah, wait, can we back up? I want to hear them vamp a little bit about Hard to believe that giant pumpkins can not only float, but be paddled

competitively by creatively dressed humans for fun and prizes. Vsauce? By the way. Did Chad Sheehy be teaming up with that? Me, a human, of course. Run on sentence. It's that TikTok rocket raccoon voice. Me, when I'm going on a boat in the ocean.

I love water, which is the opposite of solid stuff. I'm Bradley Cooper, by the way. Hey, what's up over here? It is Bradley Cooper, right? It is Bradley Cooper over here. boat in the ocean i love water which is the opposite of solid stuff i'm bradley cooper by the way hey what's up over here it is bradley cooper it is bradley cooper over here i'm in a giant pumpkin regatta i don't reckon that's the real captain racing here are the giant pumpkin regatta part two there's racing in giant gourds sometimes they'll get a little too hungry and eat the gourd they're sinking and never coming back. This is Captain America inside of a giant pumpkin. It looks like he's standing up. And he's not at all paddling the boat.

Here's Captain America in a big gourd. Weird, isn't it? It's weird. You'd be surprised. Before you step inside one of these hollowed hulks, though, be advised that... This is like Mario Kart. It's a Mario Party minigame. Pumpkin palaver.

Of course it's an organ. Wait, are these real? Yeah. They come that big. Yeah, they have competitions where you grow a big pumpkin. And I assume that the losers get carved and turned into boats. So wait, hang on. Are we eating these? No. And I assume that the losers get carved and turn into boats. So wait, hang on.

Are we eating these? No. So part of the sport is gutting it. Yeah, do you have to do it there? You fashion it right in the moment? I think that you fashion it in the moment. That seems impossible. Ooh, that'd be cool. A sport where you have to make the kayak before you race.

That'd be fun. You don't want that water lapping over and into the pumpkin, correct? Right, it doesn't have a drain. Right, it's a boat. This is an alien. This guy's from space. I, wow. No, you don't want the water

coming into the gourd. Right, because the whole reason it's floating is because there's no water in the gourd. Right, and you want to keep it on the top of the water or sink? Now now if water gets inside of the gourd then it would no longer be a boat that was functional right there's no drainage oh well i think you should just add a drain now within the sport of cheese rolling you don't roll up the hill correct no you got to roll

down the hill right that makes sense i show speed would be able to do it. Actually, he would be rolling up the hill. He would be underwater pumpkin submarine racing. Also not to be pedantic, but pumpkin. It's a gourd. Well, the title is giant pumpkin, giant gourds. This is a YouTube title. Giant pumpkin regatta racing in giant gourds they could just add like finger

family spider-man Elsa and then it's like a children's video animation pregnant Batman the Joker the Jerker you know play chunkers in the Jerker in school what's stopping somebody from putting

like a propeller on the back of one of these ambition because that guy's built a whole like entry pod Dude, what's stopping somebody from putting like a propeller on the back of one of these? Ambition. Yeah, because that guy's built a whole like entry pod. Oh, risky though, isn't it? Oh, you get stuck. Oh, it tips over. Jordan just unlocked a new fear. Look at his eyes.

Whoa. Now you're putting a portal in that thing, huh? Yes. Is that legal? Anything's legal but a motor. Oh. Oh, anything's legal but a motor oh oh anything's legal but that answers my question okay giraffe face paint presents a unique issue because the density wise you are bridging on blackface once there's enough spots closer together yeah that's close he's yeah well that Well, that's a situation where his brother

actually had his head bit down by a giraffe. And he had to take it back. It's a hobby giraffe. This one gets a G for gourd. Yeah. Can I give this a G for gourd? I don't know why this one doesn't get my gourd. I think it's reindeer level.

A D for gourd? It's a reindeer game. Jacob's putting it in's reindeer a d for door game jacob's putting it in c jacob's a renegade jacob's putting it in b now jacob's loving it that's restored oh that'd be better yeah let's put it in d i'd put it in f if i could i don't know why but i just don't like it okay so already it's hockey with a tennis ball so there's less hockey than underwater this one feels like a place where people flex if they can ride a unicycle i mean you probably grow the hockey with a tennis ball sometimes i don't okay i never that's the most canadian thing you've said all day and you said i'm from canada you said oh oh that's pretty cool though no this is cool it's pretty

violent it looks scary. This looks hard. I knew a kid in college who would ride on a unicycle and then juggle. What's the clown? I think he did go to like clown camp or something. This is pretty cool actually. This is fucking sick. Right now it's honestly, it's wheeling towards an S.

There's no animals, so that's already good. Big help. Oh, wow, he's bouncing it on the, yeah, this is sick. I'm going to give this an S. It's a very effective team sport. One of them's got a cool orange wheel. That's fun. It's so impressive to me when people ride unicycles

how they can not only go forward, but very quickly switch to going backwards. Yeah, that's, Whoa, look at that. He's playing by himself. He's playing wall ball. That is pretty sick. That's pretty cool. I'm going to give that...

I would give that an S. I hate how cool all hockey is. Because you guys don't deserve it. Don't tell Austin this. I'm too late. I heard it. Do you play hockey? I did, yeah.

My whole life. That's crazy. Oh, okay. I feel worse now. You can do curling I've done curling but not a lot was that the last one

or what's this one where the guy's holding something well this one I wasn't gonna include this one well let's include it for bonus okay bonus this is it's

that's what it's called it's catfish noodling have you guys heard of this no okay so this is this is like a midwest southern thing That's what it's called? It's catfish noodling. Have you guys heard of this? No. Okay, so this is like a Midwest Southern thing. So you have fishing where you can catch fish. I've never heard of that.

And then there's noodling. Where you catch noodles. Yes. Where you... That guy's hair is so shiny it looks fake. It looks like a Lego hair. It looks like it's inserted. Basically what you do... Is he peeing in the water?

What's happening? Yeah, what's he doing to the fish? You find a catfish den, which is a hole in the mud or dirt where catfish live. And they put the toad in the hole. I don't like it. And you put your arm in the...

I don't like it. I've seen this before, I think. That's you. So far, I don't like it. What? What? Look what he found. Oh, my God.

She was in there. Oh, my God. So you find where the catfish lives, and you basically stick your hand in there. It bites your hand, and then you grab it. It's not going to hurt your hand. No. It's not a camel. I mean, a lot of people wear gloves, I think.

Hey, it's slippery. It's a fish. Have you ever heard of the goonch? What the fuck? Is that like crunk or whatever? The goonch is a big scary fish. It's a massive catfish that actually eats people. No, it doesn't.

No. What? I have to stop you. And it's alive today? Yeah. Is it like the Loch N you. And it's alive today? Yeah. Is it like the Loch Ness Monster, but for Capcom? There's a whole episode of River Monsters. Oh, with Jeremy Wade?

That show fucking rocks. A mysterious fish that appears in multiple episodes of an Animal Planet show. Are we sure it's real? Yeah. There he is. That's it. Oh, I think I've seen this episode of River Monsters. Yeah.

It was a great episode. I absolutely loved it. If there's one I've seen this episode of River of Monsters. Yeah. It was a great episode. I absolutely loved it. If there's one thing I love, it's finding a monster in a river. He is miserable the whole show till he gets to go fishing. Yeah. It's always him talking to a very delicate Peruvian boy describing how their mother was carried away by a big fish. And he's just going like, I miss my mother.

She died. And he's like, right. I don't care. Let's get to fishing. Okay. I, this is, this is entirely too much for me.

Yeah, no, I have, I have an uncle and a cousin who have done catfish noodling before, and they invited me to go with them one time. And I was like, you were the bait. I was like 11.

I was like, don't eat me. I was just shocked by that woman who I wasn't expecting to pop out of the water. I thought he was in the hole. I thought he was in the hole. I think he was there to grab her in case the catfish got her. Oh, he was spotting her.

He was spotting her. Why does it look like he's wearing medieval armor? Pretending to be. There's something about him that just looks like he's in the wrong time period. He's emerging from the machine. This is how I look about peeing in the pool. He ain't happy.

I'm fine. Everything's fine over here. How are you doing? Nothing? Nothing's happening. I just can't move. And I've birthed a woman. Oh, no. I had a kid in the pool.

How embarrassing. Alright, well. C for catfish? I will give the catfish a C for catfish. A C for... Catfish. A cheerless, but you just organized by alphabetical order. I don't understand at all. catfish a tier list but you just

organize by alphabet I don't understand at all that's at the top or is it M organizing alphabet tier list

where you're like hmm A I guess that's gonna go in the A tier that's like ranking numbers number 10 one

it's gotta be a four it would be genuinely really fun I finally come back and stream for the first time in like two years and i i stone-facedly never admitted to joke do a tier list and it is by letter it's like oh okay what do we have uh oh cake see a is for. The cow goes moo. Well, well, well. Would you look what we have here? You watching slash listening to the episode of Sad Boys. POV, we're bullying you. Ooh, what if, ooh, what if, ooh.

For some of you, we're in your TV right now. And for some of you, we're on your little phone. Or maybe an iPad. Or an iPad, a larger phone. I'm looking at all your files i'm feeling them with my brain oh this one's disgusting you've got nasty files in my arm in there like a catfish hole i'm pulling it a woman oh no what the hell oh no the woman that lives in your phone oh i'm looking at your your secret texts and oh i can't believe you sent that i'm revealing it to everyone i'm

sending it to your family they're not going to want to text you back about. I can't believe you sent that. I'm revealing it to everyone. I'm sending it to your family. They're not going to want to text you back about that. No, don't look at my files. Stop it. No, you're in my brain. We're going to head over to Sad Boys Nights where we're going to do some fun things that you heard about when we said it in the moment.

Worry not. That's happening for the low, low price of $5 a month over on patreon.com slash sadboys. Only use discretionary entertainment spending for that. Thank you so much for listening to us, two tired boys. Two tired boys. We end every episode of Sad Boys with a ridiculous rate. And we're sorry.

The government wants you to kill me. I'm invasive. I'm an invasive species. I'm a racial piece. I'm eating Reese's pieces. Racially. Racially. I'm eating racist.

Racist pieces. Racist pieces. We're having fun. We're having a good old time. And we feel great. Oh, and we're not tired. So many lies. I feel better every day.

My knees are getting healthier with age. Future girl, future girl, how you doing? How you moving, girl? Moving, girl, how you delicate? Future girl, future girl, yeah, we on now. Take my money, go away, all you wanted. Go to rich for me.