Sardonicast - Sardonicast 102: Red Notice, Sátántangó

Episode Date: December 27, 2021

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Three, two, one. I still know Kung Fu. Is that the line that... Alex just watched the trailer fresh. We're starting on a cast. That is what he says. The new trailer from the Matrix. And I'm Adam from your movie Sex.

Hello. I'm Ralph from The Matrix. Yeah, I'm Neo over here. I nail everything. Yeah, God. Official trailer two for The Matrix was a good. Resurrections. Is that what I keep forgetting what it's called.

Yeah, I keep forgetting what it's called too because they've gone through all the like big R words. The Matrix, let's get it started. Oh, dude. They're going to say let's get the R word, but that was in offensive. Not exciting. What do you mean? It's the most exciting thing ever.

I'm so high. This looks like one of the classic Wachowski dumpster fires. I am so excited for this movies. This movies. This is only one Wichowski, though. right this is just i know it doesn't even matter i don't care it's hilarious yeah i was asking you before adam you said you're really excited for this for my is that like ironic enjoyment

because this is like it looks very schlucky it looks so funny it looks hilarious i'm so excited for this just when you thought that they couldn't take the franchise any lower they're like we've got it we got an idea we can do this they got keanu they have an idea that's cool the idea is just they'll probably retcon everything. Yeah, because it was wrapped up pretty clean. I don't actually understand

the context of the trailer really at all. Because they kind of wrapped up the conflict and now they've like reset it as a mystery just because I guess the nostalgia of the Matrix and they want Keanu and another one of these vehicle movies. It is one of the most. It goes beyond

just member the matrix because like it's using a bunch of the exact same scenes and imagery in a way that is like clearly trying to remind you of that original movie. But like none of it looks as stylish or as, you know. Oh, of course. Inventive as it was really fucking terrible. What I'm confused about is like what is this magical person

that needs to be reminded of those specific scenes in such an obtuse and obvious way, right? Like what is this person, right? Because if you're watching this new Matrix movie, it's because you already are familiar with the Matrix, you have some sort of nostalgia for it. Why would the trailer explicitly need to spell it out to the point where they're literally showing clips and they have like old footage projected on like a curtain or something? And it's like, you can't just have the characters say the line. You have to have them say the line and then show the clip of the first movie where they said the line. It's like, what is this person that

needs that? If you haven't seen the Matrix, then you're not a part of the target demographic because you're not being influenced by the nostalgia anyway. So who is this magical person where they need it that spelled out what it's the nostalgia era man it's just it's just the new one it's the new matrix even though most of the matrix movies are bad yeah most of the people excited for this i don't understand check the comments man it's like 40 million yeah the comments are full of uh hype for it yeah they just want to see like matrix fights again the trailer has no dislikes oh damn oh the one yeah i went on a different one and that i just like system yeah I hate to bring it to you guys.

YouTube, they got rid of those. Yeah. That's a good idea. It's the best idea. Yeah, it's a great idea, right? I was looking for how to like... YouTube is full of great ideas. I was looking for how to like install some programs.

I'm like, I don't know if this is a virus or not anymore. Yeah, yeah. A helpful tutorial, forget about it. No. You don't know if it's good or not. Yeah, exactly. Really helping everybody out. Yeah.

So I get the Matrix appeal. I wasn't a huge fan of it. I liked it, but it's probably one of the greatest, most important science fiction movies ever. So they don't just want to, like, throw that away. But yeah, the movie looks dumb. It looks horrific, and I'm so excited. Yeah, it does look.

It just looks kind of dumb. And like you were saying, the references, it's a little too much. And, you know, it's just the trailer. And already they're throwing everything at you. Like, you hear Mr. Anderson. You hear, you know, all that stuff. All of the acting looks bad, too.

Kind of. I like those actors. Who's the guy from Mine Hunter? He's like, he plays the new Smith agent guy. Yeah. I like that actor. I just don't think that that original part is very iconic, played by Hugo. Bliking on his name now.

Yeah, Hugo leaving. He does a great job as that part. Oh, yeah. You can't replace him. It's embarrassing. It's like Saw Spiral. replacing Tobin Bell, oh, I'm going to play a game, Mr. Like, it's Morpheus either.

Like, like, the fact they didn't bring Morpheus in, Lawrence. Yeah, and what is the reason for that? Like, what actually is weird? Yeah, you might as well replace Neo and Trinity. Yeah, because I was trying to figure this out and was looking through comments when that first trailer dropped because I was confused by this. And yeah, people in the comments were saying, like, oh, in some spin-off law thing, he's, like, killed or whatever.

This is, so we're going into like extra curricular activities to even understand the jumping off point. And it's like, man, this stuff is already like a parody of itself at this point. The Matrix is one of the most joked about kind of like movies in like pop culture. Like how do you make a new one? They couldn't even make two sequels to the first one that were like of the same quality. It was so iconic that it got like parody. Yeah. And in this trailer too, there's a bit of this like.

T's of kind of meta commentary maybe, of like how they're going to address or explain why they're doing it all again. I'm super curious how they're going to try to explain this or justify why it deserves a new inclusion. It's going to be done. Man, it's going to be done. I think that's for sure. I'm very excited. Jupiter ascending was so funny.

That was funny. Yeah, that was shockingly bad. I don't know if it'll be like that. But yeah, I think it'll be worse It could be. I think it'll be worse. You think it would be worse than Jupiter sending? They showed us the best parts in the trailer The trailer showed us the best parts of the movie And you know Keanu Reeves and it all looks so bad I really like him as a person

Not the most consistent actor no like in terms of his performances, right? Yeah So you know in this movie you can really go either way. He could either be okay or it could be really bad In terms of his acting I have some predictions from the trailer I think I think he's going to do a bad job. He's not like an actor I have confidence in unless he's like John Wick or like something very simple. I don't know. Yeah.

They're pushing the martial arts in the same way because that was always what he brought to those original movies was just his martial arts skill and the kind of physicality he brings. I don't know. Sure. There's just there's something inherently lost with the way they're presenting the whole digital world too. It looks so fake in a way that it doesn't seem to be intentional. But there is like a kind of grittiness to the original Matrix movie that,

seems to be totally lost in whatever they're trying here. Man, I wonder why one of the Wachowski's didn't join on. Yeah, maybe they could see how much of a bad idea it was. Yeah. You imagine like one of them is just like, we've got to make another matrix and the other one's like, no, and they just do it anyway? No, do it by yourself, yeah. I own 50% of the IP.

I'll just do it. Yeah, I just add it to the pile of like just bad, nostalgic. of bait movies. That's gonna be great. I guess the tide has turned. People want this now. Whereas like when it was like total recall and stuff, like getting these weird remakes and reboots,

it's encouraged now. People like it. I mean, it's been long enough. People just wanted more Matrix shit, you know? People just to... Yeah, it's probably gonna be huge.

I don't know. It's one of those universes too that's just fun to explore. I don't hate the Matrix sequels that exist. As I've mentioned already. Like, They're cheesy, but I enjoy them, you know, not only just nostalgic purposes, but also just being in the universe. They're making another Matrix game now, I think. There's going to be another Matrix video game to come out with this movie, pretty sure, is what I heard.

Oh, interesting. Okay. It's a cool universe. I feel like within the trilogy, they kind of make an effort to wrap up the whole, like, conflict. I'm just confused. Unless the story's set before the end point of that third movie, what is even? enough to explore, you know. They should just do another

animatrix. Yeah, that was cool. That was so cool. That was so much fun. Just fucking do that on Netflix. You know, you can have another love death robots sort of thing. Just more Matrix shit, why not? Probably be better. The Matrix Awakens is the game.

I don't know when it comes out. It's coming out. I don't know. Apparently they revealed some stuff at the Gay Awards or something. Oh yeah, I see a trailer. Oh yeah, the Gay Awards. You'd think that this would try to release around the same time as the movie, but I can't even find Awaken. Movie Tyen Games are always great.

Yeah, there's like a demo on Unreal Engine 5. Yeah, I can't find a release date for this video. What the fuck? Okay, maybe it'll come out a year after the movie and everybody will hate the movie. It's like... Yeah, it looks a bit uncanny valley, but... It's gonna be one of those weird things. I wonder if it's gonna be one of those like really polarizing films.

I wonder if half of the people are going to love it or something. Is this going to be the last Jedi of Matrix films? Like, please don't say that. No, I don't know. It's like, yeah, but I guess I'm just so out of touch with the general Matrix opinions if, like, people are fine with this to begin with, whereas I'm just more anti-making a fourth Matrix movie to get with, you know? Bring it on.

I get to watch it from home and laugh. I don't have to be in a theater. Thanks, H.Bomax. Yeah, thank God for that, at least. Mm-hmm. It seems so kind of random. Like, why now? Why make another Matrix movie now?

Like... Mm-hmm. Yeah, the cynical side of it where it's like, Keanu's had this, like, second coming. It's like a good move if they want to make a bunch of cash. They've been, like, advertising it in other movies, like in Space Jam. They'll basically tease. That's right.

It's like... It's just such a valuable IP, I guess. they just want to milk it yeah whatever i'm just happy kerry ann moss is getting work again she's like what's she'd be up to she was doing some voice acting by by man did a bit of mass effect yeah you're right gay gay man bye bye bye love it's so bad that's sad sorry yeah all right um red notice was a stupid movie oh you want to get into red notice now why not okay this was this was like the most

successful movie fucking ever I was it I think it's not surprising I could tell them before it was released yeah for sure one of the most popular movies of the year

you know it's got some big stars on the poster the rock Deadpool and Wonder Woman in a movie together for some reason because they're all big names exactly it doesn't matter what the movie is

they're in it and that will determine its success the movie is just those stars on the poster and you know that's like I guess that's just the marketing that's it's like look at these stars they're in a movie together and people they really watched it like

they are playing themselves well Rhymer Reynolds is playing Deadpool yeah the others are playing themselves I guess yeah it's like the most bland movie yeah it's like a kind of Indiana Jones like lame adventure movie like it was what a bad title too like it really doesn't set the stage

or like tone at all It doesn't tell you what it's about. Yeah, you're right. It doesn't. Yeah, it doesn't make, it doesn't like, it doesn't like imply adventure, like the kind of indie thing it's going for. And yeah, with the whole Ryan Reynolds' Deadpool stuff,

it really is, like, it's not us, like, over-exaggerating. His jokes are Deadpool jokes. I know. Making fun in that, like, meta way, like, acknowledging, like, foreshadowing within the, like, dialogue and, like, just the same meta-humor.

Deadpool does it's really strange it was the exact same thing it's really been boxed into a corner like he just plays the same character in every movie it's really weird and the same with the rock it's like I'm waiting for the reveal in one of these movies where like all the these generic rock action movies are some part of like a cinematic universe we don't know about yet and that's how they explain it because like it dude it's so generic you've seen this like picture being shared around where it's like four screenshots four shots for different movies with a rock in and it's just

I'm in the jungle. It's just like a generic guy in the jungle. I haven't seen that. That's really funny. Yeah, it's hilarious. It's like indistinguishable from you know your jungle cruises the one with Gemongi. It's all like the same.

Jumanji, yeah, it's all the same shit. And it's just like the most generic action stuff. Also with the Deadpool like humor relying on loads of references shoving in awkward celebrity cameos like Ed Sheeran shows up at the end who does reference humor himself. The references are making references now because he's like, I was in Game of Thrones. It's like, oh my God.

Did he literally say that? Oh, my God. Yes, he literally says it. I watched the first half of this movie and then I. Oh, right. Yeah, I forgot about that. Well, I skipped through it. I skipped through enough that I was like, oh, the rocks back at the jungle again.

Okay. And then I saw the ending. I was like, oh. Okay. Yeah, because it's kind of built up to this, this twist moment. So, spoilers for red notice. But it's like treated like a huge fucking reveal that the rock is actually kind of the villain of the movie working with the Gao Godot the whole time. It's really like played up like, man, you'll see something you've never seen before, right?

The rock playing a bad guy. It's like the whole thing in and of itself, right? It's just like, no. This is like the most generic adventure movie you've ever seen. Every single beat or cliche you can imagine from these types of movies. it probably does look better and is better than this Uncharted movie that is coming out, which is like, I guess going for some other thing. I bet you that Uncharted movie will be worse than this.

Really? But that's not to say this is great. Really? I mean, the Uncharted movie looks bad. I'll give you that. I don't know if I would say it looks much worse than this. But I guess we'll see. I also like, I get irritated by different things.

The Uncharted movie, I could imagine I might be able to like finish. this one was like this I was in so much pain on this film. Bad jokes, just like attempts at humor and just understanding that I'm, that I cannot gel with this humor at all. And it's like the most lazy, lazy big bang theory writing ever. I wrote a couple down because they irritated the fuck out of me. Keep making jokes or I'm going to send you to the worst place in the world.

Your Instagram account? Yeah, yeah. the fuck what do you how is that a joke you just referenced instagram you just made you just you just did a bazinga you just reference something technological that's one of the worst jokes in the movie which they bring up again later they bring it up again he like calls it back oh it's so ridiculous it's so cringe like holy fuck ha ha it's funny her instagram account is the worst place in the world he that was an insult because that means her instagram account is a bad place ha ha whoa like snap Fucking dumb.

That's what a lot of that humor like boils down into. It's like referencing like a website or a social media. There's that part where he's like, oh, I got that on Etsy. The most. It's like just him being quirky. The most broad. It's not just references at the expense of humor and in replacement of humor, but it's also the most broad and easy to get references imaginable.

Like, oh, the guy has face tattoos that's in the kitchen. He's Post Malone. Ha ha. You know Post Malone. he has the guy that is a famous singer with his face tattoos. That's it. Yeah. It's very sad.

It gets real old real quick. And to be honest, even before I noticed the bad humor, it was the level of the product placements that was driving me crazy. It starts real quick with like the rock opening a can of Coke and pouring it over the golden egg, of which gets mentioned so many times. There's a lot of high seed. I see is a division of the Coca-Cola company there we go Mm-hmm

Ryan Reynolds like drinking his own gin that you can buy oh aviation Yeah, it's so tasteless I didn't even realize that he was doing Yeah yeah yeah it's so like I want to bring up the action I thought the action scenes were just terrible awful you know it's just so bland and they feel the same you know they all feel the same they feel like a million other movies you see seen did you guys like the turret section like the car chase and it goes if I got that far this is part they're like getting chased on a truck and it goes in like first person like when he's shooting the turret you know it's like a video game it's like first person of like him shooting mm-hmm I'm like okay yeah some really like

fake ungrounded action where it's just all like CG bullshit like CG cars flying around It's very obnoxious. It's too over the top, yeah. And yeah, just the way it's shot, it's like very bland. Yeah, but just the rock being the main character, like, ruins the script. So many times it, like, it brings everything to a halt because they have to address the absurdity of the situation. Like, there's a part where, in like a normal movie,

if the rock wasn't, like, giant and, like, obviously draws attention, Like you'd have the main character sneak into the ballroom scene with a mask or whatever. But here, because it's like the rock, he looks hilarious with just like a little mask on trying to cover his body or his stature. And they kind of try and embrace it with the humor, but it's super weird and awkward. I hate. It doesn't work. I absolutely hate jokes that are like, it's all they're doing is like pointing out an absurdity in something. but the moment you pointed out for the audience,

it makes it less funny too. There was a moment where he's like, why are you wearing a hairnet? You're bald. It's like, if it was just something he was doing in the scene and it wasn't explicitly explained, then perhaps there could be like a bit of humor to that. But the fact that they have to say,

oh, there's a joke there. It's so frustrating and annoying. It's so cringe. I hate it so much. Like, why are we doing this? like fuck I hate that it's so it's the shit that I that I wrote or maybe that I saw other people right everybody did when they were like 13 you know it's like the laziest most embarrassing just cringed nonsense I can't yeah it's like overly descriptive overly verbal all the time

yeah overly describing everything referencing too hard yeah it becomes really obnoxious after yeah yeah there's no part where he literally whistles the Indiana Jones theme like going down the stairs he whistles it yeah it was not aware I don't think I got that far even as someone that only made it like halfway through the movie and then dipped

like there's so many there were so many scenes where it was just like wow this this setup is so obvious that there is no payoff because it's just you're telling me what you're doing in the setup and it's there's no there's no payoff because it's just it's just a thing

when he says like, oh, this soap is made out of something, pure glycerin. And I was like, oh, nitro, he's going to use it to, like, where, in what other context do you normally hear the word glycerin? Like, that's so obvious. And then when they're, like, why are they letting the prisoners, like, build the, fix the hole in the wall? And then it's just like, let's do a close-up shot on the tiny stone that he, that he just places there. It's like, oh, well, this is just, okay, this is obvious what's going to happen here. And I was just like There's no satisfaction to anything

Because There's no wonder about what will take place There's no question as to what will take place It's all just paint by numbers Yeah there's definitely no wonder Yeah I can't deal with this But at the same time

Part of me has to recognize that We're just not really a part of the target demographic And that a lot of people really love this and if if the objective of the movie is just making something that a lot of people want to watch then in in many ways they they'd succeeded right we have to you know take the l in a bit of a way and be like yeah they made that type of movie successfully they did create what they wanted to create we're just not a part of the target demographic yeah we'd lose some of the kind of free guy conclusion too because that movie resonates it's just it's just a new era it's a new type of

you know acceptance with these Netflix have just reinvented the it's just like the the type of mediocrity they're pushing out like it's I don't think this new at all relatively no relatively new in this grand scheme of like Hollywood like no I don't think so no it's like 10 years red notice red notice is the type of movie that we've seen a billion times but just forget about you know how like you look at any decade. Yeah, but now it's on Netflix. It's different. Yeah, but Netflix is, they have money that, like, theaters do, you know?

I don't, like, Netflix is just creating movies that will do well. That's what they're doing. And that's why a lot of them are bad. They fine-tuned what people want to see, and that's what they're giving us. And it's bad. So, like, I don't think that this is new at all. Like, studios have been doing this forever. Because it's on Netflix doesn't mean it.

It's like that different. Yeah, the thing it's, the fact that it's on Netflix makes it different. Like, these movies used to be released in theaters, and now they're not. Yeah, it's just a different format. It's just, it's just a different formula. Do you think the sort of lower barrier of entry kind of encourages engagement more, too? Because, like, you don't even have to go anywhere to, like, watch it. Exactly.

I think that's it too. Yeah, but that's, I mean, that's everything. That wasn't a thing in the 80s, you know, in the 80s, this movie would have came out of theaters, because there's no other way to see it. And they would have made their money that way. And you were just like happy to fucking get out of the house. You're right. The formula is there. It's it's the most bland movie ever.

Like we said, stars. It's the formula. You know, it's dumb jokes. Like Hollywood's been making movies like that for years. Now Netflix has kind of taken that formula. And yeah, they just put it on their site. And who knows if it's, if those ratings are even like 100% accurate? Because they're the ones releasing that.

Exactly. They're reporting numbers. Yeah. But, you know, it's definitely like, Like, it's got some weight to it. I don't think there's... I don't think it's just like no one watched it. It's a very marketable...

I mean, the IMDB user rating is 6.4. That's pretty fucking good for what it is. It is pretty good. 169,000 ratings, too. Yeah. There's a lot of people that watch... You could just watch it. There's no, like,

Deadpool. Yeah. People just watching kind of like... Unbund Woman. Rate in, move on with their lives, yeah. Damn. I see that it was no question that this was going to be successful in some way. There was no question that people were going to see this.

You can't have those three actors in a movie and have people not see it. Yeah, and it's on the front page of Netflix. Yeah. So, yeah. Like, even I didn't click on it right away, but I'm like, oh, what's this? It's got Dwayne Johnson and it's got Ryan Reynolds. You know, I wonder what it is. It's got the movie people in it. It's a big stars in it, yeah. There's a gag in the movie where Ryan Reynolds says something to the effect of, yeah, Vin Diesel has a tape out there of him auditioning for cats. I am. So I looked that up on YouTube and all the comments were like,

thanks Ryan Reynolds for this. This is hilarious. Like, no one referring to like his character name or anything like that. Of course. Like Ryan Reynolds. Yeah. So it's like,

yeah. What character name? It's just illuminating. Yeah, exactly. But I guess that's what people want and like. It's like they're friends with Ryan and they're going, like, what's Ryan doing this week?

It's like watching Homer Simpson's like, new job each week, you know? Yeah. Yeah. You just want to see Ryan Reynolds on screen. It's not about the character with a story. Yeah. Yeah, you're not like invested in anything.

Right. Why? I don't know. I'm just like looking at the IMDB page. Her dress looks so stupid. It's got like boob windows under the boot. Yeah, it does. Really bad poster.

Like, what the fuck's going on there? Anyway, yeah, these are the, I don't know, maybe three most obnoxious actors in my opinion. I don't know. I'm trying to think of a cast in a film that could be more obnoxious than this. I don't think it's possible. I think the only addition they could have made to make it more obnoxious is put Chris Pratt in it.

And the came out of him. They put Chris Pratt. Chris Pratt's like a meme right now. What I mean is I'm so tired of seeing these actors. Like, Dwayne Johnson has been a ton of movies this year. Ryan Reynolds has been a ton of movies recently. You know, it's like I constantly see these guys. I want to see someone new.

Chris Pratt is the same way. Like, he has, like, five movies in the works. He's Mario. He's this. You know, it's like, look the fog. But at the same time, we see that people are kind of pushing back against Chris Pratt in a way. Some, not everybody. We see the same thing happening with Kevin Hart.

Not everybody. But Ryan Reynolds is just so unanimously loved apart from, like, maybe some people in our community or something, right? But it's just like, it makes it so much more obnoxious that this is like, yes, this is the, this is the apex of what an actor is or a celebrity or a personality or you know like this is this is this is the one this is what humanity has settled with like that that just makes it more of not yeah i guess i guess it's under my skin too not anthony hopkins like someone it's not just that it's not just that it's all the same Deadpool jokes it's that they're all bad like i didn't even love the humor in the Deadpool movies.

It was a bit funnier than like all this other shit. But like I didn't even, it's not my brand of humor. I'm not really big on like, uh, he in the middle of explosion, it went Somo and he said, did I leave the oven on? And then he kept going. Like, that's not my brand of humor. It works for a lot of people, not for me. And so seeing, seeing this just continue to replicate that he was born to play

a deadpool, and only Deadpool. Kind of his curse. There's a reason. why so many different writers are able to replicate the exact same thing is because it takes no talent to write those kind of Deadpool jokes. There's a reason why he's playing the same character and having the same caliber of jokes and same writing across so many different properties with completely different writers that have never talked to each other. It's because it takes no talent to do. That's why there's consistency. I like Deadpool. I like both the Deadpool movies.

There was definitely much more of a novelty to it when it came out. because it was kind of fresh, you know, like, remember the superhero burnout and all that. And, like, that was kind of a fresh take on superhero movies. And that fourth wall breaking, that wasn't really, like, much of a thing at that point. So Deadpool kind of made that popular. And I think it works in those movies. But, you know, how many fucking times can you do the same jokes? I mean, Deadpool's pretty old now.

It's been a couple of years. Like, you know, it's time to do something else. Like, it's still the same Deadpool shit. Yeah, I mean, you're right in that way. I just think Deadpool's much better than this. And reference humor, yeah, but there was at least a novelty to it then because it was not really popular. Yeah, it's now. It's the copycat nature that bothers me.

Because I'm fine with it in Deadpool as well. It fits and it's like true to the character and everything and it has more going on. It's got the like gratuitous violence. Yeah, it's the commentary on the superhero stuff. True. Well, this isn't like a, it's not trying to like a deconstruct a fucking, fucking. National Treasure type movie or anything like that. It doesn't have that much, like, cleverness going on.

It's just like a really generic just adventure movie with these three characters on the poster. You just know everything about it from that poster. If you get something from that Red Note's poster, then you would like this movie. If you see Gal Godot there in that red dress and makes you want to watch it, then it's for you, you know? You see Ryan Reynolds just staring you down on that poster and that tickles you, then this is for you. If you see the rock glaring at you and that puts you off, it's definitely not cool you. And I'm in that camp. It tickles you out.

Tee. This movie's cancer. Three out of ten, I know you might think that's pretty high, but as I said, not the target demographic. They made the movie that they were trying to make, you know, at the end of the day, you got to give them some credit for that. Yeah. Yeah. Three. Yeah.

I've definitely seen worse. Like, I was probably more bored by that Tomorrow War with Chris Pratt. Speaking of Chris Pratt. Like, that is like true generic to me. I mean, not that this isn't like true general, but I don't know, I liked it like slightly more and something like that. I thought that movie was so stupid that I liked a little bit more. It was, it was, Tomoror War is stupid and it keeps me glued in because I'm angry and I, and I'm like trying to understand how the, how the universe works, but it doesn't care how it works. It's just, I guess, yeah, this doesn't even have the anger.

That's like a fun little deconstruction for me and I just keep following it. Whereas red notice, I can't deal with those shit jokes. And nothing's happening anyway. Like, there's nothing. There's nothing. It doesn't matter if I'm following the plot or not in red notes. Yeah, exactly. I'm more indifferent to.

I don't have to interpret anything. I felt like no emotions. The Tomorrow War released the same way, but they were both just kind of put on streaming. You know, like they just came out. Like, what the fuck's this? And I watched them. Like, oh, this is terrible. Both were huge successes, aren't they?

I like anticipation. You know, don't you, don't you like anticipation, like knowing when a movie's going to come out like a year before or a few months before you have like a trailer and just like build up. I kind of like that. It like builds your anticipation of the movie. It gets your mind racing. People build like expectations, you know? And like now they just like dump a movie on Netflix and it's just like, okay, it sucked. Like, no wonder it sucked. You weren't looking forward to it. You even know it existed five minutes ago. And then like it's just gone. It's a very, um, it's a very disposable movie and it's very bland. I thought.

I would probably go with a three out of ten like Adam but I don't feel strongly about it at all Yeah, I felt much much stronger about this director's previous movie a skyscraper That was like one of the ones that broke me That was all so much funnier in my mind, but I had fun making fun of skyscraper Oh yeah, that was so much fun An action movie like it's just such a bad idea all around fun to make fun of it's like shitty die-hard Yeah, this is just like generic I can use 18, I heard.

I might, yeah, I might even score this, what, two stars out of five? That's fair. It's totally fair. Yeah, just nothing. Just a nothing slightly below average, exactly what you'd expect from this director. Do you think it's worse than Free Guy? Do you think Free Guy's worse?

Free Guy personally annoyed me more because of the subject matter, I think. Sure, maybe splitting hairs. Yeah, I would definitely describe that as splitting hairs, though. But you also just have more Ryan Reynolds, which I guess is depending on how you feel about him. Tickle you or not tickle you. Yeah. All right. So there was a film recommendation, and I recommended it.

Yeah. So spoilers for Shatan Tongo is how the director pronounced it. So I hope that's how you're supposed to say. I'm scared to say the title. Yeah. Chatan Tongo. Chatan tango. Is how he said it.

Directed by Bela Tarr, if I don't know if I pronounce that right. But it does translate to Satan's Tango. So I thought I was being silly when I called it Satan Tango before, but apparently that's just what is. That makes sense. It is considered to be his masterpiece. It's seven hours and 19 minutes long. That makes it pretty unique. Very unique.

It's not the only long film I've seen. And, you know, you could, I've seen, I've binged a mini series that was longer than that in one day, you know, so continuous story in that way. So I don't really see much of the difference. Well, we can talk about television, right. We could talk about TV and like the length of that. There's a lot of movies too, or not a lot, but there's movies that are about like really long like that. Yeah. There's like another really famous, like great one that's like, you know, five hours long, I think.

Yeah. I'm going to check my. Northay end of history was great. That was about five hours long. Oh, yeah? Same director made The Woman Who Left, which I'll be watching for my 2016 list. I think that's like six hours or some shame. Yeah.

There's a few long movies out there. This one is, it is famous and infamous for a few different reasons, one of them being the length. Spoilers for this movie. There's some disturbing stuff in it, too. I guess we'll, like, kind of get into that. I have mixed feelings on it. I guess I don't want to get too specific. to that. I do want to hear what both of you think about it first.

I feel like my experience with Jean Delman, Delman. That maybe changed my outlook on the runtime of movies and certain limitations maybe that we put onto them and what can come with experimenting with a timeline and the length of a movie. And I didn't really know much about it, but before jumping in, I read that it was about the kind of fall of communism in Hungary, sort of late 80s, sort of time period, which is like a really fascinating setting in my mind that I can wait to see explored. But yeah, that runtime is off-putting and a huge barrier to entry. Yeah. I'm torn in terms of, I have a deep respect for this movie, and there was so much about it that I really enjoy.

continuing to enjoy and get more out of the more I read about it, the more I think about it, so an imagery that sits in my head. The overall mood of it, I wasn't expecting it to be kind of as confusing and experimental with the whole, its structure, which I'm sure we can talk about with the whole tango aspect and reading that it was also kind of based on a also sort of infamously confusing book, I think, helps wrap your head around it too, because I could imagine a lot of the more confusing elements working very well in a novel sort of setting where you do get to kind of hear inner monologues and whatnot

that gets lost when it's purely film and you don't rely purely on narration or whatever. But at the same time, I was still just so bored at certain parts. It's plodding. It is plodding, but it's intentionally plodding. And any suggestion to cut down its plodding nature, I feel like would defeat the whole point of it kind of in a Gene Delman kind of way

where it is about the misery of these characters and the misery of the setting and exploring the misery that comes from power structures shifting in this way and people who are left on the outskirts and dealing with that. The setting does, it all like feeds into a central theme and mood

that I really enjoy. But I would not blame anyone for being put off by that runtime because that is a big part of the discussion, yeah. Yeah, that's like the talking point. Yeah, I don't know. I feel the same way as you. Gene Dealman's a good one to bring up.

You know, I feel it's kind of the same way. I really like, it got really good around the five-hour mark. It's like a joke like I can't. You know, it's just, I don't know. Yeah, it's like a seven-hour long fucking film. It's a very hard film to sit through. Oh, did you, by the way, did you do all, one sitting both of you or no?

I paused it and like got up a couple times, a few times. I stopped at the first intermission and then went to bed, watched the rest of it in one chunk. Yeah, I'd say I was paying attention 100% because it's just so long. You know, even, I think TV is a good thing to bring out now because at the time of this movie, there might have been like a really like a great aspect to it. Like, it's this really epic story.

It's very grand scale. It's seven hours long. now we have television and we have shows like succession and breaking bad that tell stories over like hours and flesh out those characters and you know like that that idea i think is kind of dated and and also like the episodic nature of television makes it just like a little more digestible i think yeah it flows different episodes have a structure and you know cliffhangers that make them much more watchable which is why i think i can watch like five episodes of succession like and not really this It's a different pacing.

Yeah, this is like a film. I mean, it's very different. I just, I can't really wrap my mind around sitting in a theater and watching seven-hour movie like all the way through. I think that's, I think that's a lot to ask of someone. And, but this is still like, like, from what I've read about it and just knowledge of it. It's an important movie. It's all shot. Like, the acting's good.

It's just really, um, that, length is really daunting. Well, yeah, reading that it only has about 156 shots in the entire movie. Yeah, that's crazy. For that running time, too, is actually crazy when you're looking at, like, thousands for, like, a normal kind of Hollywood-type movie. Like, the first shot of the movie is just like a, like, farm animals, right? Mm-hmm.

It's like eight minutes of, like, cow. Yeah. That's what I mean. Like, it starts with that. You're like, holy shit. Yeah. Yeah. So the fan base around this film, and I guess by extension around like Baylor-Tar,

I've read into this. I've seen a particular video essay even that was featured on the Blu-ray and that somebody actually linked in our subreddit recently called Orders of Time in Motion, video essay by Kevin B. Lee. And I watched that and there was some really, really interesting stuff in there. talking about how an interpretation for the cows at the beginning would be like, oh, okay. So we're watching the cows escape, not watched by humans, going away from their normal environment.

You could make a parallel between the human beings that are later thrust from their environment, leaving the village under circumstances, blah, blah, blah. You know, there are parallels there. There are obviously certain shots that are, you know, really clearly sort of like a existing to show contrast between situations and where characters are at. So you have the doctor at the beginning and then you have him like sitting in his chair with the notes or whatever. And then later in the film when he comes back from he was at the hospital, I think. You can see just like how the environments changed and how the shot mirrors itself or yeah, there was the, sorry,

there's so many characters and so I'm just trying to remember their names too. One of them I just, I think of his Fodora man. He had almost a Fadora at some points. The guy, the guy who went to the police and made the report or whatever. And you see like this

swooping camera movement around the table when they're constructing their report. And then when the police are rewording the report, you see the same sort of swooping camera angles. So there's definitely some intention in the film that I like.

And the other really interesting, notable one that I'll bring up here is, you mentioned that the number of shots in the film is incredibly low, especially for seven hours. This video essay mentioned that the scene with the most shots in them is the one at the police station near the beginning, and it's the only scene that is shot in kind of a A, B, shot, reverse shot sort of way, where the average length of a shot there is only like a few. seconds and it's done in more of a traditional Hollywood film production sort of way. And that's the only scene in the movie. And so the interpretation there that a lot of people seem to agree on is that this is a commentary on, I guess,

the need for order, because that's what the officer is lecturing about in that scene at that moment in time. He's talking about how there needs to be order because, blah, blah, blah, you know, people aren't able to do that. And so it's a commentary on like, Okay, the order of filmmaking, the old style of filmmaking, this already existing structure versus, I don't know, creating a seven-hour movie with like ridiculously long shots. So I like those parallels there.

However, I think that there is a lot of over interpretation, even within this video review that I found very substantial and very interesting for much of it. half of it is just like insane nonsense. I don't know if you watched the whole thing, Alex. Did you, did you? I did watch the whole thing. And I picked up on the same things you did, like the cow thing especially, and there is just a lot of symbolism with animals in the movie, which I was picking up on and even the way you're kind of led around the movie

in these long, fucking minute long shots where you are led around kind of like a cow, where you are going to the slaughterhouse sort of thing. And I like all that sort of animal farm-esque imagery. But yeah, I was kind of stuck on a similar thing where it's like, yeah, how much of this am I projecting onto it out of sheer sort of boredom in some of these shots? Because I get, I didn't feel it as much during dialogue scenes because I felt I was able to just interpret a lot more from what they were saying. And the holding shot on like a single character while they are monologuing for a long time, you get really interesting, unique performances out of actors that way.

They're just given so much more room to play around and improvise. And there's a kind of improvisational nature to the way the dialogue comes across. But when it is minute long sequences of characters like refilling their drink or having a lunch break or walking for a while, like after a few minutes, I do feel like I understand the point. And I do think the framing and composition of basically every shot is pretty much perfect for what I'm looking for. It looks like you're almost like going through a gallery of photographs,

like moving photographs. It's like stunning in the disgusting misery it's showing, but it really does push you. It is intentionally pushing you, I think, to just see what it can get away with almost and what emotional reaction you get from that. I think it's not just, I agree that there are plenty of opportunities for overinterpretation in this film. It's almost a film that kind of warrants that in a way.

It attracts that sort of attention. And I don't think it's just because of the length. I don't think it's necessarily out of boredom. I think it also has to do with its presentation. the fact that it is a very atypical length of a film. So when I say not just because of length, it's not just because like, oh, I'm so bored, I need to think of things,

but also just the expectation of having a film that stands out and says, yes, I am seven hours and 19 minutes long. Not only that, yes, I am a film that is in black and white, you know? And I think a lot of that does do a bit of the work for the film in terms of like what it's going for, in terms of what the expectations for the film are

and what its perceived quality is. Not to say like, oh yeah, this film is just a bunch of bullshit and anybody who likes it is stupid or anything, whatever some people think I wind up saying whenever I say something like that. But yeah, if you look at that video essay, which again was featured on the Blu-ray, about half of it is just fucking insane.

It's just the most bonkers, like nonsense that doesn't make any sense. sense to put in a video essay. A good chunk of it is, so because this film is told in a non-chronological way, there are certain scenes that are essentially recreated. So when the doctor is confronted by the girl, before he chases after in the, through the trees, uh, you have the scene where, fuck, I forget his name from the beginning is like hiding behind the house and, uh, then goes and confronts the other guy and knocks on his door. And so there are certain scenes in this film that are recreated from different perspectives or the landlord yelling at the villagers as they're leaving.

And so this video essay that is on the Blu-ray spends a good 10 out of its 20-minute runtime talking about like, you'll notice that the first time that we see these characters, the pacing is a little bit different. The girl, the doctor falls slightly earlier in this one than he does after this. In this one, the girl runs away three seconds after. And he's like, he's heavily implying that this is all intentional and not just a normal thing that happens when you try and recreate the exact same thing. First of all, I'm sorry, if you look at interviews of Beilatar, he says they don't even use scripts on set, right? Like, some of this is kind of improvised.

So especially considering that in his own filming techniques, right? Like, it's a normal thing. Like, almost every single movie that's ever tried to go like, oh, and here's what happened from this angle. never done it perfectly because it's very difficult to get it perfect. And yet this, half of this video essay is like, oh, but perhaps this, oh, I got to find the quote here. It's like absolutely incense. In sense. It's absolutely insane. Let's see. So yeah, I just wrote down some of what happened in this video essay because I found it fucking insane. The quote is, putting these movements side by side reveals discrepancies. Here, Futaki leaves 15 seconds earlier. Are these discrepancies, unintentional effects

that mark the difficulties of maintaining continuity when filming a seven-hour feature film or can one describe these differences with cinematic significance, if not an outright intention? And so, yeah, he shows a few of them. Are these discrepancies between the shots meant to convey how different characters perceive time and space? Are they meant to reveal the gap between external,

external objective appearance of reality and internal subjective experience? And that even in the same shared moments, characters are tragically disconnected from each other by their own perceptions. This is like everything I hate about video essay. Like there's some of the shit on YouTube too where it's like, man, you just said nothing in a lot of words. And the tone of it and like the, uh, it just like the movie where it's like the implication of like, yes, I am very educated, you know, but you're not really saying anything. Not to say that the movie doesn't say anything, but there's a lot of parts in the movie that don't say anything that people overinterpret the fuck out of is what I'm saying.

Yeah. Like, holy shit. I encourage people to watch that video because it's literally half of it is just fucking insane. Like, I don't understand why anyone would put that in a video. And I was like when I fucked up at the beginning of my Sedeck-Tiki, New York review and talked about like the clock for like five minutes or whatever. But that was like, I don't know, how many years ago was that? Like seven years ago? Yeah, that's like one thing. I actually thought that was cool.

I'm like, oh, yeah, the text thing with the clock or whatever. Yeah, I feel like I try to avoid that. video essays like trying to sound like a loon. I'd rather say nothing. I'd rather say nothing than try to sound like fucking crazy. I guess it shows you the passion like behind this movie though that this video essay is What bugged to me about that is it felt like he was trying to fill up time and didn't have more to say about the movie.

So half of the essay. That's true. Was he paid by the company to make an essay for the Blu-ray and then, you know, they said it needed to be 20 minutes, but he only had 10 minutes worth of shit. to say about the movie? I don't know. I'm trying not to be mean here, but like, legit, half of it is, is just showing that there are slight differences in the timing of certain recreated scenes. And then, holy fuck, that quote of just, is this, to highlight the difference between objective and subjective reality? Like, holy shit. You could say that about

anything. Yeah, it wasn't a strong point. You could take like the scenes from Pulp Fiction and say that, like every single movie, almost every single movie that's ever tried to recreate scenes like that, done it with different pacing. You can't have it perfect unless you're filming two angles at once or unless you edit it in very strategic ways. I'll have to rewatch Gus Van Sence's elephant because I remember there were some interesting ways that that was done where he basically like you could tell that some of the audio was taken from the other take but you couldn't see the character's face.

So they were able to use the previous takes audio. Stuff like that. Like it is possible. but having a few seconds of difference in what a character does, that's not a unique discrepancy. That's a normal thing for a movie. So, yeah, some people overinterpret the fuck out of this movie is what I'm going to say. And also, I'll let you guys talk a bit more if you have more to say about it.

I've still going to rant a bit. I really don't. I really don't have anything to say. Go ahead. All right. So this is going to, there are some people that are going to be mad at me. So I've seen three Bellatar films now, well, two and a half, I guess. The Turin Horse was my first experience that was a very, very, very slow movie, not as long.

I saw it in 2011 at a film festival in Vancouver, and I had brought a co-worker from my work. I worked at Best Buy at the time, and, you know, this was our first time hanging out outside of work. And I didn't realize it was going to be one of these, like, oh, my God, slowest movie ever sort of thing. And so part of my experience watching that movie was also me being like, okay, I don't even know if this guy's seen a single art film, right? And so we like, we left before it was over and I was like, yeah, this is really slow. I don't know if I ever want to give it a second chance again because not only did this movie, not supremely wow me in that sense, but there's something about Beilatar.

There's like some part of his brain missing that allows him to not be annoyed when he plays the same song over and over and over. and over again the entire movie in a loop that just goes forever and it's like a 10 second loop that's what happened in the Turin Horse too they got they got the composer to make like a really good song when the horse is on the carriage and like moving towards and like

some nice string instruments and then he spams it the entire movie it's like every fucking 10 minutes it's like a punchline and he's playing the exact same song over and over again there is literally one song in the film The Tour and Horse and they play it throughout the entire movie this film the seven hour long Shaton Tong

is not nearly as bad, but there are long sequences where just the same fucking loop plays over and over again. Some of the music in this movie was just straight up bad. Some of the music in this movie where I could hear

the weightlessness of the shitty synthetic keyboard bullshit that they were using. And I was thinking just like, what child wrote this? What child wrote the score for this? It was so sloppy. You can hear these like, weird.

It doesn't even sound like intentional. It's, it's, but of course then a massive Bay Latar fan would find some

metaphorical reason why it is intentional. They'd say, no, the, uh, the situation of the

villagers is represented in how the song it sounds imperfect and blah, blah, blah. And I've made those arguments before with something like, uh, like, uh,

like, uh, her, the soundtrack for her. I thought that it actually fit really well for arcade fire to use at not, you know, super well-tuned piano.

But the playing never felt sloppy. The playing never felt like it was literally being done by a, a four-year-old, right? And it didn't loop forever. It didn't loop forever. I don't know what part of his brain is missing where he's somehow not able to get annoyed by that, but it's absolutely nuts. And then when we get to the actual tango scene, I've still got that song on my head. I've only seen the movie once. I can tell you right now how part of it goes, but-da-ba-da-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-da. It goes fucking forever. And then the longer the shot goes, so some directors that I really love, like Michelle Hanukkah.

I broke in record, I know I love bringing them up a lot. But, you know, the shot in Amor, where you see the entire crowd of people. And it goes on for so long, the longer that you watch the shot, the more you're able to soak in, the more you're able to see little details, the more you watch the movie. You can watch it a second time and be like, oh, wow, like that performance over there in the corner is like really natural. There's tons of extras. A lot of things happening.

When I see a Bayla Tar film, the longer a shot goes on for, the more imperfections I'm able to notice. The longer the shot went on for of the, the, the, you know, the shot went on for of the the actual tango scene where everyone's dancing, the more I'm noticing just how fucking awful the accordion playing is.

It doesn't look like he's playing the accordion at all. It's like he's doing it. Look at his fingers when he's doing it. It looks so cringe. It's like the piano playing in fucking what's that one take movie? Victoria.

Victoria. It's like as cringe as the piano playing in Victoria. And I wouldn't notice it if the shot didn't go on for so long, but it did. And so I'm able to soak in more things that are wrong about it. In that scene, notice how like

nobody's saying a word there's no single like yeah or woohoo or anything no words being spoken to each other but they're like kicking each other and doing all this weird shit it seems so fake and phony and unnatural i don't understand the longer that it goes on for the more i notice how much i hate it right and then that loop just plays forever it's like it's the most irritating thing in the fucking world i can't understand it i just don't know what it is about his fans or him that are able to just hear imagine an alarm going off for like 24 hours or something just beep beep beep that's what it translates to me as when I hear the exact same loop of the song like a 10 second loop play on for fucking 10 minutes I can't stand it I don't know how anybody else can they don't just do it with the music too there's some bits of dialogue where they do that sort of thing as well right there's like the the drunk guy who's repeating the same line over and over again for minutes and minutes it almost like puts you in a trunk It's really quite odd to experience.

And it's part of why I'm glad I watched this movie. I feel like I got a valuable experience. Not that I want to rush back to see it anytime soon, but I just feel like it's so kind of audacious to push it to this level, you know, to push it to this extreme, the seven and a half hours. But putting in that like meticulous design with that camera work with, I didn't really notice the like in that. like in that tango scene, the music playing, I'm sure I would on a rewatch now, but...

It's so cringe. It's so bad. Yeah, I don't know. I just, like, fell into it after a few hours. I had such an interesting experience. I really enjoyed the first couple hours as it was setting up, and I was just curious as to where it was going, because I wasn't familiar with this director. I wasn't familiar with the style. I thought maybe it was going to... The shot length was going to vary as it went along or something, or just how experimental.

it was going to be. I did find myself getting attached to this kind of tango structure, the two steps back, one step forward kind of idea and the kind of confusing narrative that is built from that. I do agree. It doesn't fully come together for me. And I feel like there's a lot of muddiness to it that is, yeah, it's easy to attribute the kind of you can fill in the gaps with the setting and the historical background. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, I guess that's why that consistent tone, and I was enjoying the performances and just the reveling in the nihilism, the misery of it, in this kind of false profit character who's fucking with everyone and just lying and manipulating these poor people. Like they are just, like, farm animals, just being, like, used and abused for seven hours. And it's so, like, gratuitous when it breaks down into, like, the kid and we haven't talked about the, like, cat stuff. and a massacism that comes out. That was like, okay, so, sorry, I'll let you talk about it first. Well, yeah, that was one of the things that I didn't like, obviously, it was the cat stuff. And it's one of the more controversial parts of the movie when reading about it.

It does upset a lot of people. And cat lovers should be warned, I guess, that there's some pretty horrible animals. animal abuse recorded. And I guess that it was explained as like there was a vet on set and it was apparently the director's like own cat or something, but it's still, it's disturbing to watch. It reminds me of like a cannibal holocaust type thing with it like, I don't know if I really get down with injuring animals for this stuff.

I don't know if it's fully necessary for the artistic intent. Oh, yeah. Achieve similar things without having to do that. The, uh, on the Wikipedia plot summary during that scene. let's see if I can find Yeah here we are The quote on Wikipedia Somebody wrote

She tortures and poisons her cat to death For some reason Like literally wrote the words For some reason In the wiki plots every Because there isn't really a good reason Why she is doing it Or why the movie should include it

I have an article where Bailatar responds to the questions about the cat So people asked him about like The issue of like animal welfare His response is, are you crazy? He snaps, it says in the article. I had two cats at home.

Can you believe that I would kill a cat? Never. First of all, we knew the cat scene was coming, and we knew that the cat would have to rehearse with the girl. Every day in the hotel room, they would do this kind of turning game. By the end, the cat was used to this and did not care. He continues, we knew the cat has to die, so I called my vet, who was looking after my cat at home,

and he came to the location. I told him, you have to give her a sleeping in, We will push the button on the camera when you give us the sign that the cat is getting dizzy. We shot on his signal and the cat fell asleep the whole crew stood around waiting for 25 minutes until she started to wake up. It was totally okay. The cat did not have any trouble. Believe me, all the cat noises you hear are samples that we found from the sound archive on the internet because the cat was totally silent. Okay, there's his excuse. I still think he's fucking dishonest. He's fucking bullshitting. I don't think like oh yeah, he killed a cat on set, but like cats are not acting animals. I'm sorry when the like you can see the discomfort in that guy. Stop fucking lying to people You dishonest piece of shit I'm talking about this in nine lives

Yeah cats are not cooperative Really at all You can't get a cat to fake an emotion for the camera That's not what was happening If you have any understanding of like Animal body language or anything Like its ears are like pulled back It's like clearly under distress

Like that's really fucking obvious And you can't think that shit So unless he's gonna I mean he's dead now So he can't really explain that part Unless he was gonna explain that, like, by having, like, the super acting cat that just is able to perform emotion for the camera in a way that no cat has ever done in history.

They rehearsed every day. Yeah, I think he's fucking bullshit. I've never heard anyone rehearsing with a cat. Either he knows he's lying, or he has such a little, like, such a low understanding of, like, empathy that he doesn't understand when the cat is actually. under distress. Like he's either lying or he's a piece of shit or both, right? So. But they like suspend it

from like a mesh sack and stuff too. It's like, how do you explain? Yeah, you don't. It's clearly under distress. And the fact that he's lying about it after is just like really cringe. Just be honest about it. Fucking own it if you're going to do that in a movie. Oh, yeah. I feel there's like a really great

maybe two and a half, three hour movie in here somewhere. Like that I could actually watch. all the way through and I'm like wow that was actually really great but it's it's a little too daunting for me at this point and I think I gave a good reason like I'm why I don't want to sit through a seven hour fucking thing the fact that it's seven hours didn't negatively impact my experience at all it was slow you can have a movie this slow that's like the tour and horse you can have a movie that's this slow but shorter

and I still feel the exact same way about it when I heard that this was based off of a novel my expectation was like oh finally we're gonna get a that translates the entire novel without having to summarize it, and it's just going to feel like a long story. And for the first, however long of the movie, like, I don't know, 30 minutes, it really seemed like it was going to be that way. I was actually pretty engaged and interested in the conflict of these characters. I love the sound design of, you know, when they're talking about the plot to steal the money and the clock's just ticking. And I'm like, wow, that sound design choice is adding so much tension and excitement to the scene that would otherwise just be like two people. people talking sort of thing. There's a lot that I loved about it, but over time, slowly, it's just like,

wow, the length is totally not justified at all. You could tell the exact same story in like three hours and it would be totally fine. Like, I don't, there's, there's key parts of the movie that are sticking out in my memory of things that I enjoy or even things that I dislike. But most of it is just like really unnecessarily long in a way where it's just like, sure, like it's respectable because it's balzy to be like, yeah, I'm making a seven hour and 19 minutes movie, whatever. But I was I was really hoping for something where it felt like seven hours and 19 minutes worth of story, not just the shots were longer. Yeah.

You know? Yeah. That was more of my expectation, too. And I read something interesting about the book, because this kind of screams out to me as one of those books that you would imagine would have one of those reputations as being like, don't even attempt this in, like, cinematic form. Like, you can't do something like Dune,

like the tango structure and everything is really, really ambitious and then adding in the seven-hour runtime is a crazy idea. But I read that every chapter in the book is a long paragraph which does not contain line breaks, which makes me wonder if that was this excessive length was his sort of way of trying to adapt that type of storytelling, trying to push it through that. I'm honestly way more intrigued to read the book over watching this again. which I don't know if that's a failure on the film's behalf. I do think there's something really interesting.

I mean, how it is. Yeah, there is something really interesting about that structure to me and just, it's totally unique. I haven't really seen a film like this before. And I don't know how I would ever really, just with that setting to and everything in the historical context, I really find it expressive for what it's going for, for that fall of communism for the

like depravity the lack of like self worth and lack of purpose that is portrayed it does achieve that well but yeah I don't know how far I can defend it if I'm not I'm not even really willing to rewatch this anytime soon if there weren't such irritating aspects

in this movie then I would watch it again what's honestly preventing me from even considering watching this film the second time is a lot of those music annoyances that I mentioned earlier. Like, I can't deal with that. Like, that was, that was, that was, that was so irritating and grating. Like, it's, yeah, it, it, it sounded like a fucking child playing on a keyboard, and then

they looped it. Like, I'm sorry, you can't, how, how, how do you put that in a movie? It's so, honestly, just, so cringe. It is draining. It's a, it's a draining project. And extremely pessimistic in nature, like, this, this lead, character is, I mean, he basically is a nihilist. He's talking about how like the little value and the meaninglessness of everything around him and the scathing way he describes the people of the village and how he's

just like a sociopath and just doesn't care about anything or anyone. I like that kind of relationship. There's substance in the movie. There's tons of substance in the movie. There's things about it that I like, but I almost like more in the context of a conversation about the film than I do watching the film you know yeah yeah you do have to bring up the question of the I think it was in one of the mark commode like books I read he was talking about reading films over watching them and I do feel like it it's one of those for me where it kind of I found myself reading it and just falling into it that way maybe as opposed to getting enjoyment from watching it and is enjoyment even the right word like it it's not even really

looking for your enjoyment. It's just kind of, it is what it is. It's putting it out there. Mm-hmm. I mean, I love Jean Dielman. I love that movie. And I,

the second time I watched it, I loved it much more than the first, and I might love it even more on my third, you know? Like, there's nothing in that film that is just so irritating and grating that they would put in there.

There's nothing in that film that makes me cringe because of how bad it is. There's maybe like one, effect, like, I'm not going to say what it is, it's spoiler, but there's like one moment where I'm like, that could have been done a little bit better, but that's about it. It like in the entirety of the film, whereas in this, in Beilatars films, this one, also, it's just like, I love, if I'm going to see a movie like this, if I'm going to see a movie that's like seven hours, 19 minutes long,

black and white, very slow and methodical, the implication of having something that's slow and methodical like this. I would love to see something where there's an overwhelming sense of control from the director, intent and control and precision. That's what I'd love to see if this type of tone or style is going to be reflected. And I just don't get that watching Bayla Tar's films. Again, as I mentioned, the longer that I look at a shot, the more the phoniness reveals itself. There was another shot with the doctor looking through the binoculars and that like border cut out of like the binoculars thing. And, you know, if the shot wasn't so long, then I might just be like,

oh, interesting. This is from, you know, this guy's perspective over here. And it would happen quickly enough for me not to notice the inherent phoniness of it. But because it went on for so long, I'm like, how the hell are you getting this angle from your desk? Shouldn't we see like a bit of the window in there? How come, like, nobody's ever held binoculars this still in their entire lives. This is obviously just a steady cam, right? Like, sorry, this is obviously, not a Steady camp. This is obviously a tripod shot, right? Like, no, there's not a single person that has ever held binoculars that still ever. It's not possible. He's just moving like so, so steadily from side to side, getting impossible angles. And then when it just, when the shot ends and it cuts to him

in his chair, it's just like holding it bare, uh, not even like super, uh, super firmly in his hands. And it just, I literally just laughed out loud. I was like, ha. Because it, the reveal was almost like a punchlight of like, holy shit, that's actually what the intention was here. Like, oh my God, I was like searching for, I was searching for excuses for why, why this shot would look like that. And then all of a sudden it's like, no, I guess I was supposed to believe this here. Yeah. So, call me a nitpicker, whatever, but I like to see films, especially ones with this tone and these implications of like, yes, I'm a seven-hour movie. I would like to see precision. I would like to see control and, you know, some sort of meticulous design from the direction.

and I just don't get that from this director. So sorry fans of this director. I'll give him one more chance with Workmeister harmonies, but after that I'm done. I'm never watching a bill. I don't know if the fact that I'm willing to even watch one more is, you know, more than more than he deserves. I will say I do feel like there is precision there for those visuals,

but as far as like a camera movement. It's really. Yeah, yeah. And sort of the staging and one of there's some creative really good. cool stuff in there. Some of the weather effects were really good. There's a quote I saw from the director actually on this kind of note who said, we have a story, but I think the story is only a little part of the whole movie, which kind of goes to show, I guess, the thought process of what it was going for and just how a little kind of plot there is and how much of it's one of those

sort of experience movies. And it is one of those movies where if you're inherently more willing to, you're looking for all these things. to be like pushed and changed and to some people that's like it's almost like a challenge yeah yeah it is it's almost like a form of hypnosis it is it's messing with your head it's pushing with certain formulas that you're used to um which are fun to see like push to this degree and so do you think it would just be better if it was trimmed down if it was just straight up a fucking four hour movie would be so much better and it would still be even a five hour movie it would still be even a five hour movie. It would still like make its point about you can you can still make your point about like the order of cinema and you know have the one

yeah yeah shot reverse shot while everything else is like slow and methodical. You can still retain that style without dragging things out for so long. I've seen so many movies that have that style and are making that same point even some you know that don't need to be this long. And again the length is not an issue. It's the fact that the length isn't justified really at all. They didn't use the length in any kind of useful, purposeful, meaningful way that, you know, couldn't be done the same with a five-era movie. Yeah. Casino is one of my favorite movies. That movie's three hours long. Very different film, much faster-paced,

but it seemed like, you know, I don't mind a long movie or a show. I just thought this was a little out there for me. That's my experience, though. I like watching it all the way through. I don't think, I don't even know if it's designed to be viewed that way. I have no idea. Yeah.

Yeah. It seems like designed to kind of not be enjoyable in a weird way. That's also where its value lies. It's really interesting. Yeah. That's a piece of art. Yeah. It's valuable to some extent.

Yeah. I can see how some people could really connect with this director. Like if I believed that everything that Bayelotard was doing was genuine, then maybe, sure. but I don't know. He lies about the cat shit. He lies about his hairline. He's just like a dishonest director. I'd probably watch Gene Diehlman over this.

Hell yeah. Just because it's shorter. There's a billion reasons why I would watch Jean Diehlman. Yeah, there's a few reasons. It's much more well-made. Yeah, in some ways, yeah. There's much more to read into, even, honestly, thematically.

But again, like, who knows? Like, the problem with this movie is, like, it's a film that I feel like I could get more out of on a second watch for the reasons that I enjoy it. And as I, you know, before I started ranting and yelling about the movie, I was saying some positive things and noting some of the thematic and purposeful shots, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I could get more out of this movie by watching it a second time, but it's abrasive nature is preventing me from ever wanting to do that. Like, you can't. I'm not, I'm never going to watch this movie a second time. it was a it was not just a chore it was painful it was genuinely painful for me to get through i can't believe i can't believe people can't believe people can listen to the same music loop over

and over and over like that and not i don't understand if people just don't if there's like a sense missing or if i'm just hyper sensitive to something like i really genuinely don't understand but it's like hell for me it is asking a lot of the audience i do struggle in terms of unless you have like a movie podcast where you can recommend it to like movie fans who are willing to dive into something like this you know they have to acknowledge that fact that i mean look at how many ratings that house on imb it's got like 10,000 ratings like it's inherently going to put people off but that doesn't necessarily you know yeah this is a masterpiece and like still barely anyone's seen it whatever five out of ten a lot of things about it that i really respect and admire a lot to read into about it, pretty ballsy, ambitious, but just one of the worst experiences

I could sit through, and I'm never going to watch it again, and half of it was bullshit, and people are reading into it too much, five out of ten. I definitely liked it more than you. I'm more on a three-star or a three-and-a-half star from this. I feel like it reaches really high highs, but it also does drag, and I'm still, I'm not fully sold on that that runtime it is it is asking just so much of the audience so whereas like you know we've seen films like come and see which are deal with like extremely heavy subject matter in political times which are you know heavy and get

across the similar kind of tone or if you're looking for environments and kind of interesting shots like this you could watch like a stalker you know which is rooted in a you know, similar kind of background too. So it just doesn't reach the heights of what it could go for. But I don't know. A lot of the imagery is like ingrained into my head at this point. And I am thinking about it more and more.

But yeah, I'm stuck on how just how attached or how much I am putting on it, as you were saying, and how much the community for this film is like imposing things. onto it because of the open nature and its open structure and its kind of lack of a clear plot and the traditional elements you'd expect from a from a narrative but yeah anyone who's read the book let me know in the comments I'm curious if some of these criticisms are addressed or whatnot kind of defines a rating for me this one I'd probably be around you guys five or

six out of ten yeah I just don't feel strongly about it and yeah I'm like in the middle of you two somewhere. Yeah. That's a, I mean, it's fucking seven hours long. Like, holy shit. Honestly, yeah, whatever. It was on your watch list already. I'm glad we got to see it.

It was, it was, yeah, absolutely. You had to pull the Band-Aid off at some point, you know? Yeah, I'm really glad I watched it. I took seven hours, but you had to do it. I can't say I was paying attention, like, all the way. I don't blame you. Yeah, I don't blame you either. Yeah, I was honestly hoping for something a bit more.

less boring you could like take a nap and wake up and it would still be on yeah yeah not that I did I'm not just saying well yeah actually going back to something you mentioned earlier Ralph in terms of I'm describing it as an epic I would say it's it's kind of epic directing the story's actually quite it's fairly small scale which I wasn't expecting because reading kind of the descriptions of it being like about the fall of communism around that time. I thought it was going to be way more like an epic and that kind of scale about maybe the politics of the time or, you know, not for it to be as sort of vague as it wound up being kind of meandering on purpose type thing.

It's epic and its length. Yeah, for sure. It has a sense of epicness. Maybe it doesn't live up to it. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I don't know. This is an interesting recommendation.

Yeah, yeah. Had to do it. Sure. Had to fucking do it. Had to. Question time. Okay, let's do some questions from the Saldonikas community. If you'll leave your own questions for us to answer, head over to the subreddit where there is a suggestion thread where you can ask whatever you feel like, just like candied unicorn did.

He says, what are your thoughts on the great lengths people went to try and figure out major plot and character details for Spider-Man no way home? Personally, I don't see the point in watching the trailers for a movie. I already know I'm going to see, but it seems like some people just want to read an entire plot synopsis in advance. Some people are so excited. I understand that. Yeah, that's weird. Not so much now, but when I was a kid, when I was a kid, I got really excited for movies.

I'd watch the trailers a lot. It's just like, I don't know. They like Spider-Man. Spider-Man's a very marketable character. I mean, you can't blame people. I understand that. Does this come from, like, the fan culture of, like, breaking down trailers and sharing all these screenshots.

The movie wants you to do it. Yeah, I don't really mind it. Yeah, the movie wants you to do it, right? That's why they're, like, making these things public because they want a reaction, right? Yeah, I don't really have an issue with it. Yeah, I don't understand people who read scripts for things that aren't out yet that they're going to see anyway.

That's a weird one to me. Or, like, plot leaks or whatever. People who read, like, yeah, the hate-for-late script. when that yeah it's like what are you excited for them if you're not like i don't know it's so weird yeah there are people that like will search out spoilers for themselves they like spoilers they like spoilers they like spoilers they want things spoiled before they watch something yeah it's like a type of person it's i'm just the total opposite i just the the the like less stuff you know about the story the more chances it has to surprise you especially with how bad like so much marketing is

and especially how bad the marketing is for these Spider-Man movies in particular. I think Sony's really terrible for it, like specifically. Yeah. Their posters are the worst. I don't know who's in charge of that. If it's Marvel or Sony. Their posters are the worst or their trailers are the worst. Yeah.

The Spider-Man's suits for the worst. Yeah. I'm not a big fan of the suit, yeah. It looks bad. The original suit looks better. The original suit's better. Toby one. Yeah.

Yeah, the Toby one is top tier. Yeah, they gave Spider-Man the Deadpool eyes. Yeah. I don't mind that aspect. I mind the just looks a little too cartoonish. The suit looks too cartoonish. Like, it looks CG even when it is. We always look CG, yeah.

It doesn't look like present in the environment. Yeah. It's really fucking cool. That suit. It's like fucking awesome. That's like the only way to describe the Spider-Man suit like the original one. There's nothing wrong with it. It's perfect.

Okay. People are excited for the movie And we'll talk about it next episode Because we're recording this episode And the next one fairly early Because of Christmas stuff Quondale Dingle has one for us What are your thoughts on Taika Wattiti

Adapting the In-Kal Graphic Novel by Jodorowski To film If you guys do not know The graphic novel is a lot of Jodorowski utilizing all his unused ideas For his unmade Dune film Do you ever think anything will come of this?

I feel like Tycho Attici keeps being attached to these big projects that just kind of go nowhere or through those When was the last time that I've been? Wasn't he attached to Akira? Oh, was he? He did an Akira. He was supposed to be doing like a live action Akira. Yeah, that's weird. Isn't that?

That is weird, isn't it? I don't think that's gone anywhere. I don't even think he's like the best director anyway. So if I hear him attached to like a Hodorowski concept. No offense, Alex. I'm sorry. No, I'm kind of. I know, he's a Kiwi.

Like, I'm just, I'm not particularly excited for, yeah, I'm not particularly excited for a Taika Waititi adaptation of a Hodorowski concept. That doesn't sound like something that jumps out to me as like, oh, this will be great. Yeah, like, I'll watch it. Yeah, especially if it's a graphic novel, I'd want to see someone with more of an animation background, maybe. Yeah, I've not even saying this condescending. Like, just Tyco Itty stick to the Thor movies.

I mean, you got a good gig there. Just make Thor movies Forever Why does you have to do anything else Stick to being Hitler Stick to being Hitler Yeah I forgot he did that movie That's good

Yeah it's kind of a shame if it's But if it's the only way that this Graphic novel will see The big screen I suppose I can get behind it Is it even being turned into a film? Oh yeah I suppose they're just saying adapting It might be like some

It could be like a web series Yeah It's just an IMDB web series hidden away Yeah I don't know I'm not inherently turned on to the idea Just because of Withiti's name

Being thrown in the bucket Yeah I haven't read the I don't even think it's going to happen It could but Yeah probably not I think it'll go the way of the Akira movie And he should just make Thor, Thor, is it Thor 3 or 4? Thor 4

Just make Thor's Just do thores That's it. That's all you need to do. For Thor. Just make Thor. We have this one here from Goodbye to the Beat, which is a bit shocking. Hey guys, I discovered the show after I was arrested for possession

and had to do many hours of service work for the county jail. I live in a state where incarceration is basically a replacement for rehabilitation. Anyways, during my service hours, I listened to every episode of Sardonicast that was out of the time. Jesus Christ. And I can confidently say it really helped me get through some tough times. What's it like being in a position where your

work can affect people in deeply positive ways that you couldn't imagine or predict? Does it affect your work or audience interaction in any way love from Texas? No. I feel good. Yeah, I was going to say, where is he from Texas? Yeah, fucking. That's fucked up. That is fucked up.

Possession of what? Because if it's weird, then it's like, oh, I feel bad. Child porn that I'm like, get back in jail. If you're a possession of a human being. We're going to assume they were talking about weed. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to throw out that accusation.

I'm just making a hypoethic. Yeah, some drugs or something. Yeah, I think that's funny. Yeah, it's seen the same thing. Fuck. Let's assume it's weird. Clearly, it makes us feel great. I don't know.

Yeah, it makes me feel great that people watch a show and they look forward to it and they're happy listening to it. And it distracts them. from like the aspects of the lives they may not find so great so i mean that's great and i i hope his service is up or it's done or it's up soon i didn't hear the whole question exactly but yeah i hope he's hopefully done with that shit soon because that's kind of fucked up yeah it's the worldly nature of it i like just you know your voice going around the world and people from all different backgrounds hearing it and getting little anecdotes like this are like wow

some crazy stuff. Yeah. It's, I think it's particularly fitting for like the podcast format too, because people can live their lives while incorporating that. I mean, some people say that they do that to my YMS reviews. I would prefer for people to watch them because I put a lot of work into the visual aspect of it. But can't force people to watch something in the way that you want them to. Sorry, David Lynch and who else?

I don't know. A bunch of people. Yeah, the podcast format. to help set out a lot. And I don't make it with that in mind. I don't think, like, yes, I am providing therapy for someone right now. But it is a nice thing to know. My music, I would say, is the exception to that, where it literally is therapy.

But that's more for me. And the ex, you know, if other people get that out of it too, then that's a good thing. But it's not necessarily for, not necessarily for other people. But I do have that in mind with my music, I guess. Yeah. Okay. Alex C has one for us. Hey Gang, I recently saw the list of the top five highest grossing films of the year.

They are, number one, the Battle at Lake, Shang Xin, a Chinese film. Number two, hi-mom, a Chinese film. Number three, no time to die, James Bond. Number four, F-9, the Farsarger, and number five, Detective Chinatown three, a Chinese film. So in the top five highest-grossing films worldwide, three are mainland Chinese. How do all what do you feel about this And does this say anything

About the current state of Hollywood today Well those three films Weren't made in Hollywood then I mean But I You can draw conclusions About what Hollywood is catering towards now Yeah

Mm-hmm Have any of you guys seen this about Like Shangjin No No No I've heard about it

So did Are these like Hollywood produced movies And they're like No I guess they're asking Yeah what it Yeah Yeah they're asking

About the implication China has its own like industry now and Obviously yeah huge population the people go see movies right So that's part of it they've embraced capitalism while pretending to embrace communism They turned the blinker left and then made a right turn So yeah they're a part of the global market for films there's a gigantic Chinese population a lot of them watch movies. Yeah, and so yeah if the objective is to make money, then you cater towards that audience. If the, you know, Netflix is trying to make a movie for that a bunch of Americans want to see, they put the Ryan Reynolds, the rock,

and Galgadoo in it, and it works, you know. The types of things I want to see an experience are rarely the, uh, the, uh, same as everybody else's. So don't see a lot of money put into it. That shows like, I mean, American culture and people in America, it's just like Western culture. It's very different. for it now. We have streaming and we watch movies on streaming. Like that Red Notice movie, that might have been one of the highest grossing movies of the year at some point, but instead it's on Netflix and people digest it that way through streaming. And many movies come out that way in TV. And, you know, maybe in China it's not the same way. I'm not sure. But there's definitely like, it's a huge presence of that in America with Disney Plus and Amazon and all that. Those tech

companies kind of pushing their stuff too. They're in competition with Hollywood also, you know, Hollywood has a lot of competition. I think that's, it's not like they're the only game in town anymore, like they were for a long time. And like they're the only ones making movies, you know, it's not just like those major studios anymore,

like Warner Brothers and Disney and, whatever, 20th century Fox. A little more competition now. What do you think this means for the future? Is every movie good, like every big budget movie going to be made for China? At least with them in mind

It's not even the future It's just currently happening Yeah I feel like that began 10 plus years ago right And just even like even different cultures In different countries like Chris Nolan talked about How much he loved filming in India for 10 Like he might make a movie in India He might make a Bollywood movie

You know like who the fuck knows He'd make a slumdog million He could You know But it shows it shows the um You know where audiences are and what kind of audiences want to go to theaters specifically. And, you know, the kind of movies you make for that theater experience, you know, it's very different now.

We're, us, we're more like watching movies on streaming. We like dramas. We like an action movie too, but, you know, a theater movie is usually very, like, sensational, high budget kind of stuff. And I think that does really well in China now. Yeah. I'm really hoping, like, if I see one type of movie that I want to. want being pushed by Hollywood and China. I want to see a lot of money in seven hour long black and white films.

I think that would be a really good way to take the market. If the top five grossing movies of the year were all seven plus hour black and white art house films, I think people would be happier. Yeah. No. Yeah, I think you're right. This year, there was a lot of Chinese films in, you know, America, like, through the Hollywood system, like, Shung.

She, Eternals directed by Chloe Zhao. Those aren't. Which we had criticism. Chinese films. No, those aren't Chinese, but they're like, they have Chinese actors in them. They're made with the market in mind. Like fucking Milan. Yeah, Milam was a battle.

Oh, it's even just like Hollywood accepting China into its, you know, into its grasp or whatever you want to say. But yeah, it's like these Chinese, you see the Chinese film influence in American movies with Eternals and with Shang Shi. I'd say shunks she's much better I think turtles is a piece of shit but that's me yeah

so it's definitely it's definitely impacting things I think it'll impact things more in the future yeah we're seeing it already yeah yeah need more data more time to post yeah I'm interested to see how things go

I mean like as a person that doesn't live in the United States I already see discrepancies in terms of like what films are marketed here versus like you know I can drive three hours south get to Seattle and I see movie theaters playing like weird like religious movies you know like like uh what is that heaven is for real or God's not dead like those movies like they don't even try to put them in Canadian theaters for the most

part like you don't see marketing for him here it's just like oh this is this is is America Perry movies that's another one those are America movies you know so like there's already like discrepancies in in terms of like what films are popular in what countries It is, I guess, just a newer thing to have American movies trying to, I guess, be sellable in multiple markets at once. And then you see things like Disney censoring, you know, no ghosts, no gaze sort of thing. Right. For China.

Chinese movies overtaking Hollywood movies in the box office like we saw. Yeah, it's very interesting. Fucking Zhao Shea. Like, you know, like American people or audiences, maybe they're. They're afraid again sick because of COVID, all that. I'm sure that's affected theaters over the past couple of years. I think Alex, you said, like, people start deaning in a theater. It's kind of an outdated concept now.

I'm like, yeah, I definitely get that. I don't know how it is in China, though. It could be a completely different environment. Who the fuck knows? I'm not from there. Yeah. Clearly, people aren't deterred from going to a theater in China because movies are making fucking ton of money.

Yeah, tons of money. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know what the fuck's going on. They probably have, like, also very stringent. not only vaccine and mask protocols, they probably take everybody's temperature going into the movie and scan their ID and social credit score

to the point where it's like their rights are being taken away. But that's probably how they're doing it. You know, like I've seen some clips of people in China, like even to get to like some outdoor venue, you have to get like your temperature checked and show your thing. And like, it's like, this is outside. But. Yeah.

Then they have like special built like social media. like platforms just for like China and stuff. It's all very scary. Yeah. Yeah. It's the season three premiere of Black Mirror with Bryce Dallas Howard. Yeah. Yeah, basically. Well, while we're on this topic,

there's this one from a fretful porcupine who says, hey boys, if you ever seen any movies in theater in a foreign country and experienced something different, you wouldn't in your own countries. Here's an anecdote for you. I went to Bangkok. a few years back and went to a theater to see Dunkirk. Right before the movie started, the audience was made to stand up in honor of the recently deceased king, which was strange for an American-Mexican dual citizen like me.

I also saw an old white man walk in with a Thai boy who couldn't have been older than 15. Lord knows what they're up to. Oh, shit. Jesus. Holy fuck. That's terrible. I haven't experienced something that crazy.

But I saw, yeah, it was that second Spider-Man movie when I was in the movie. like Greece or something. No, it just, they'd mistranslated the titles. So instead of far from home, it was like Spider-Man away from his place, which was quite funny. Yeah, certain American theaters, they have like fucking beds in them, basically. Some of the AMCs is just like a level of comfort and luxury that should not exist. Just, yeah, I've seen a few.

And then the, what's it called, the Alamo Draft House Cinema? Love that. But yeah, mostly just in terms of like, the consumerist aspect, I would say, in America. I don't know if audiences are that radically different than Canada for watching the film. Have you never been to like a... What's the clapping situation like in Canada? Does it depend on the movie?

Because it's like very rare to get a reaction, but the vibe I get is that you get way more engagement in an American crowd. Yeah, American crowds do more clapping. and it's mostly for like superhero movies. Like I was actually imagining, I don't know if I told you this or not, but I was imagining when I was watching, Spencer with Twilight. What's her name?

Kristen Stewart. Kristen Stewart. I was imagining because like she's a Twilight girl and we had just gotten out of seeing, I think we were seeing Eternals the same day. I don't remember. But I was just imagining like, what if we swapped audiences here and the expectations

and as soon as Kristen Stewart Stewart jumps on the screen in Spencer. Or people go like, who! Like, I was just, I really wanted to do that, but I didn't. I held myself back. That would, I didn't want to disturb the movie for people. But I was just like, yeah, it's not just certain audiences, but it's certain types of films, too. It draws a certain type of crowd.

Superhero movies, you're going to see a lot more of that in. I've never been to a theater outside of America, I don't think. It'll speak, uh, I've been to, like, Mexico, Italy. They don't speak English. Like, why would I go see a movie? Like, it's probably fucking like a different language. Some of them are American movies. They'll just have Spanish subtitles or something.

Yeah, they'll maybe put the subtitles, but, you know, I wasn't sure. If I ever visited a... If I go to Canada again or if I ever go to London, like, yeah, I'd go see a movie there. Like, an English-speaking country. You got to make sure you don't go into a theater that has the British dub, though. Because you'll need subtitles. It's English, but it's just much harder to understand. that would be so good British dubs

get on it Alex you can make a killing so I dub Satan Tango yeah yeah do it okay let's do this one from synch docky 239 excluding the bad slash mayor ones in Mississippi grind which a 24 movie would the rock

and slash or Ryan Reynolds fit best in no they cannot be background characters slash extras. They can either play a new character or replace one of the current actors. Example, Ryan Reynolds can play a new character in good time or replace Robert Pattinson as Colin Lucas.

If you took Dwayne Johnson and made him the cow in first cow, it would be a better movie. What about the lighthouse with the rock and fucking Ronald? Oh, no. Don't say that. I'm just imagining like the fucking, like a good, like, duo.

Pirate monologue with Dwayne. Hark! Yeah. Like Swiss Army Man. Swiss Army Man with the two of them. See, Swiss Army Man probably would work the best out of all those. Tone-wise? Yeah, with them?

Because it's more of a comedy. Yeah. Yeah. Hmm. Lighthouse is a comedy, too. It's just not a... The Witch? Yeah.

The witch. No. Make Ryan Reynolds like Blackfell. up or the goat. Sure. You could do like a midsummer one, like the rock and I'm going to replace Ryan Reynolds with Kevin Hart and have the like relationship drama be around them. What do you think?

In what? Midsummer. Yeah. That's a good one. Sure. But Kevin Hart doesn't want to play a gay character because people will think he's gay. Oh shit, you're right. So you can't have that.

Okay, Ryan Reynolds has to be Ryan Reynolds then. Sorry, guys. All right, I think we got time for one more Okay, let's end on this one from Buster was a great dog What's the funniest reaction you've gotten After telling someone what you do for work I'll often just lie and say

I'm in IT And people quickly stop asking questions That's funny That's quickly end it That's a good little trick If you ever want to escape That's a good one That's a good one, yeah

Yeah, I say like I do podcasting that's it. I just leave it there. Sometimes I just say like, I'm a YouTuber. Yeah, you can see that too. But I just, yeah, I feel like once that comes out, then the questions begin. So it's like a whole, you know, depending on who you're talking to, you know. Yeah, that's the thing.

It's a very uncommon position. Like, how do you do YouTube? What do you do? How do you make money? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. The landslide begins. Yeah

I would like to I would like to have this same I would like to be a fly on the wall for the same conversation but Mr. Avocado explaining what he does on YouTube yeah I eat and cry

and fart and yell we should have him as a guest mention of a lot oh man what do you think his favorite movie is that's a great question I don't know if Mr. Avocado has time for movies and is busy eating and crying.

He's never seen a single movie. He seems like he's got his schedule packed as it is. Super Size me, chef. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. I've never gotten like a super funny reaction or anything.

Occasionally somebody will be like, it'll be really clear that they're just like, oh, that's so easy. And I won't say anything, but I'm just like, oh, why don't you do it? What are you doing? Just do it. Just do it then. All right, I think that's it.

Do you guys have anything else to say? I think I'm good. I guess not. Buzzinga. All right, it's Ralph's turn to recommend a film, and it's not going to be seven hours because we only have a week to watch it because we're recording some stuff really because of Christmas.

That's the reason why we did a seven hour one last time, by the way, everybody who was commenting, how come we weren't allowed to recommend trilogies for the episode 100, but Adam recommended it was seven. It's like, yeah, well, sometimes we have more time than other times, and I'm not going to I wasn't about to watch.

There were two recommendations. We could have had two trilogies. It's not their podcast. Sorry, sorry, podcast. I didn't want to watch six movies while I'm trying to show Alex my hometown or whatever. Yeah.

All right. Anyway, go for it, Ralph. Yeah. I'm going to recommend a light one for everybody. A friend of mine and they talk about this for a while. Yeah, I should recommend it. We're going to recommend Supergirl from 1984.

Supergirl. Okay, cool. Yeah. From 84, you say? Yeah. Okay, I found it. 1984. Fade done away.

Oh, yeah. That's looks spicy. Okay, cool. I'm hyped, actually. 4.4 IMDB, 42 metascore. This looks dope. The superior movie that started at all. 1.9 on Letterboxed.

Hell yeah. Okay, this looks fun. I'm excited. It says it all. All right. Cool. Ralph coming in to save us from another shot untongle. From Bella Tar, whatever.

Yeah, another Baylor movie, double episode then. Oh, my God, yeah. So yeah, we'll talk about Spider-Man, the new Spider-Man next week also. I don't know. We only have a week. But we'll all see it before then. If you don't want to be spoiled for 1984 Supergirl, watch it for the next episode. These episodes come out every two weeks.

You can listen to them early as they're edited by going to patreon.com. Sardonicast or Sardonicast.com and sign up for premium. Only $2 a month. Also, we got merch and Christmas is coming very soon. Holy crap. By the time this episode's out, it'll like pretty much be, I think it'll be after Christmas, but never mind. We're recording some stuff. I've given you plenty of warning. You should have bought it already, okay? It's your fault if your, if your nephew's going to cry right now because they don't have a Sardonicast D-shirt. Anyway, yeah, thanks for watching. Happy Shrek. I know Kung Fu. Yeah.

Thank you. Bye. Thanks. Bye. Bye.