Sardonicast - Sardonicast 144: Indiana Jones 5, The Boss Baby 1 & 2

Episode Date: August 7, 2023

Support the Show for $2 a month and receive all future episodes early at https://sardonicast.com and https://www.patreon.com/Sardonicast. Buy Sardonicast T-Shirts, and other merchandise at https://teespring.com/stores/sardonicast. Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/sardonicast Website: https://sardonicast.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/Sardonicast Reddit: http://www.reddit.com/r/sardonicast Twitter: https://twitter.com/sardonicast Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/sardonicast Sardonicast Highlights: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8AhJ0bzQgs5fb9m_ZCRqkw/featured Ralph's channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/ralphthemoviemaker Alex's channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/IHEOfficial Adam's channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/YourMovieSucksDOTorg Alex's Twitter: https://twitter.com/IHE_OFFICIAL Ralph's Twitter: https://twitter.com/ralphsepe Adam's Twitter: https://twitter.com/2gay2lift Adam's Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/YMS Ralph's Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ralphthemoviemaker Intro music by: https://www.youtube.com/user/anUnkindnessvideo Fan art: https://old.reddit.com/r/Sardonicast/comments/158gmyu/well_miss_you_ralph/ https://old.reddit.com/r/Sardonicast/comments/156msfz/so_long_ralph_well_miss_you/ https://old.reddit.com/r/Sardonicast/comments/14yjrms/made_fan_art_of_ralphs_last_recommendation_and/ Timestamps: 0:00 Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny 37:21 Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One 39:00 The Boss Baby 1:14:26 The Boss Baby: Family Business 1:47:27 Questions 2:06:17 Ralph says goodbye 2:13:50 Outro, Recommendation

Three, two, one. It belongs in a museum. Did I do that one last Indiana Jones episode? I don't know. I didn't re-listen to it before this one, but fuck it. We're doing indie again for a little bit. So I'm Adam from Sardonicast. This is your movie sucks.

Hello. I'm Ralph, the movie maker. But this time you're talking about Harrison Ford. That's the difference. He belongs in a museum. Yes. At this point. Yeah, that's the difference.

Yeah, I'm Alex from Aichi. Fart poop duty. There you go, there's my addition for the intro. Oh, yeah. Nice. You like that? You like that guys? Oh, yeah, thank you.

I was like, I was trying to remember a specific quote from Boss Baby, and I didn't really feel like going through all my notes to land on something. So, uh... You have notes for Boss Baby? I have notes for every movie we talk about on this podcast. I don't. I got notes on notes for boss baby. The movie was so imprinted on my brain.

I don't need notes. It is memorable. Yeah. So we all watched, before we get to the epic bossiest boss of all babies. The epic double feature. The epic, the most epic featured of baby features. Of boss babies. We saw the inverse, we saw a very old man in Indiana Jones 5, the dial of destiny.

That's true. I didn't think about the, uh, that's a funny, like, I don't know, theme. Yeah, we're Benjamin Buttoning here. We're doing old first. Right. We did a movie about babies and then we did a movie about an old man. A geriatric. A geriatric patient. Yeah. And to be perfectly honest, the only reason I watched this is for both of you because you said you'd watched it. Oh, that's nice.

There's a potential like, hey, we could watch this the next episode. I was never going to fucking watch this shit. I was never going to watch it. And I watched it in theaters for you guys. So, you're welcome. So you enjoyed it then? No. No.

Yeah, this is a weird one. How old is Harrison Ford now? I'm just looking. He was born in 1942. He's 80. Good Lord. Yeah. That's crazy.

Quite a weird movie this. Director by James Mangold, like first and foremost, not a bad director. I actually like his movies quite a lot. I love Logan. Logan's great. Yeah, Logan's awesome. Ford v. Ferrari's good.

Yeah, he's done some goodies. 310 to Yuma. Yeah, 310 of Yuma is great. But yeah, it's a weird movie. I forgot that that was mangold. 310 to Yuma? Huh. Yeah, pretty sure.

Yeah, girl, I'm interrupted as well. Yeah, he's got a, I don't know, he's got a broad catalog, but none of them are really that popy or pulpy. I mean, quite like Indiana Chances. That's true. He's got some good movies under his belt But he's not a director that I could point out and be like This is one of his films without hearing that he directed it beforehand Like he doesn't have a distinct style is the problem

I can't watch one of his movies and be like yeah this is really mangould Like I could watch a fucking like you know like Tony Scott or like Oh yeah Michael Mann or like Quentin Tarantino or like Michael Goy It doesn't even have to be like a fucking big name you know Neil Breen There's certain directors where you know it's from them.

Right. Yeah. This is not one. Something the Red Letter Media, the Red Letter Media review pointed out is like he's not like a really like a comedy director, like a comedic tone director because like Logan's very dour and... Yeah, I guess he doesn't have much experience in that. Yeah, you need like a little bit more like lightheartedness and that's like something Spielberg

balanced like really well, like the humor and the action and the tend to. and the horror even like in Temple of Doom you know that's a pretty dark movie and this is like uh you know there's like jokes thrown in there but they don't really feel organic i didn't really like the fleabag girl in it like like not that because i was like defending her last episode i don't you know there's a lot of like sexist stuff thrown at her but who was that again the his like goddaughter in the film yeah she was a little too quippy to where it was like it was hard to take anything going on seriously. Like, you know.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like, I was thinking of like, you know, Raiders of Lost Stark when he's fighting like the big guy in front of like the propeller plane. Like, there's no quips really, you know, because he's too busy getting his ass kicked to like, you know, make a quip.

Like, you take the action seriously. Here it's just like a lot of dumb jokes like getting thrown around and none of it's really funny. Like, that was a big takeaway for me for the movie was it wasn't really funny. It wasn't really that funny. No. Yeah, because it's some pretty big shoes to fill, isn't it? Yeah.

Or Spielberg movies. And they couldn't even do it with the fourth one, you know, the Crystal Skull or whatever. It kind of fumbled then. It was almost out of, the character was out of time then. And what was that, 2008 or whenever it was? Yeah. You kind of belongs in the 80s. That's where his character kind of lives and should die.

Because it just feels bizarre, especially because this last week I saw like Mission Impossible, you know, And it's like just a completely different caliber and it feels like a modernized like action franchise. And it can't really keep up. It's just a strange thing of like an 80 year old man like leading a popular action serial. Like it just doesn't make sense. And the movie doesn't lean into it enough either. You probably could have done something a little bit more clever with that maybe and leaned into the oldness more or made some kind of deeper commentary. But it's also just trying to be like a silly, pulpy Indiana Jones movie.

and it can't really decide where it wants to sit with that because mad, I don't know about you guys, but this, this one was boring as fuck. God damn, like that middle section was sagging so much. It's two and a half hours long. Why? Why? Yeah. Way too long.

Absolutely. Yeah. Like my whole, uh, my whole crowd was like either old people. Yes. Lots of old people. Like checking their, they were checking like their medicine. Like, oh, it was in time to take my medicine. Like, they kept taking out their phones and like, check.

their watches or whatever or there were like young people who were just like completely bored like they just kept talking and taking out their phones i had to shush people a couple times yeah just playing fortnight whatever that's what my audience was doing like they just kept leaving yeah right yeah well because they were dragged there by their like parents or grandparents yeah because they're like looking after them yeah it's not even for them they're watching this old man right and you know i love harrison ford he's great on like the conan o'brien podcast recently like he's hilarious but You know, that being said, like, he's an 80-year-old man, like in this action movie. It's like, you know, like, what are we really doing here?

Like, can't you find, like, someone else to be Indiana Jones? But I guess at the same time, you can't do that because Indiana Jones is so tied to Harrison Ford. You can't really, like, make a movie without him. And that's, like, where they're kind of stuck. Because they already tried that with Crystal Skull and Mutt. That was clearly what they were trying to do. But, like, no one liked it. They were going to pass the torch.

And then, spoiler alert, they really overcorrected it with that one. they're like actually he's dead now. He died between the last movie and now. It's like, it's kind of weird and dark. It's kind of bizarre thing to just say and not even like film any of it also. Not even say his name. Like they're like his son. My son died or whatever.

Oh yeah. Leave it open in case it's like, oh, he had a second son. Just in case they want to bring it back. Maybe. Yeah. That was odd, right? I wonder if they would have kept Shia if he hadn't been like, I don't know, he's got like some problematic accusations or something. I don't know.

Yeah, something like that. Not like his inclusion as a character. I think, yeah, people just didn't like Crystal Skull. So it's weird even making this to begin with, in my opinion, like, all the things we've already said. And that just bloated runtime. Like, I don't know how you guys felt about that first, it felt like 40 minutes that like opening action scene. It just goes on and on and on. With the deaged Harrison.

Yeah, with the deaged Harrison. Yeah. That was a huge part of the movie. A huge part of the movie for no reason. Yeah, what did you think of the CGI on that? I couldn't get into it because of that factor. Yeah. It's so distracting to me.

I mean, there's a few factors. Well, yeah. Well, yeah, one, that, it's so long. And the de-aging Harrison Ford, like, in some shots it looked okay. But in a lot of shots, it looked very odd. Like, it looked like a CGI effect. The overwhelming. The majority.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This whole de-aging trend, like, it's just, I've only seen it use like really well like once or twice, you know, I liked it in Blade Runner 2049. Exactly. Because it was kind of the point that it's supposed to look off, you know, it's supposed to be like an Android monster.

But here you're supposed to like believe it and it. And that's like a quick scene. They didn't change his voice. Yeah. Oh yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's so it sounds like old. And it also looks better. It also looks better in Blade Runner 2040.

Even if they were trying to pass it off as like not. like an android. It still looks way better. Yeah. It's under the, it's under the specific conditions and angles and like, you feel like,

if you know, it's just like much more of a competent director, especially when it comes to like digital effects, something that was made very apparent in 2049. Yeah,

it's more clear like what he wants. Yeah, yeah. And it's such a restrained scene in Blade Runner. Like, yeah, the character kind of just walks in and stands still, whereas this is like full action scenes

and he'll look up the track. and so his craziness. Yeah. They literally just like filmed the entire section and we're like, we're going to CG over his entire face. We're going to like deep fake this shit thinking it would be fine. Just be like, oh yeah, it'll just be dark. You know, you won't be able to see all of it.

So it'll probably be fine. It's like, uh-oh. It still looks like shit. And not only does it look like shit, his voice sounds really old. And so it's really off-putting like that's not young indie's voice. He still sounds like an old man. There's like a shot. He's jumping from like train car to train car and it looks like a cartoon like just the animation on it.

It looks so bad. It is. And that's, um, yeah, we're talking about the de-aging. That's mostly like Lucasfilm that like does that because they did that with like, you know, in that Bubba Fed show they de-aged Mark Hamel. Yeah, the Mandalorian as well. And in, uh, you know, Leia and like Rogue One or Tarkin. Right.

It's mainly them and yeah, I don't. I tend to like the Lucas film stuff for like. I like a lot of their stuff recently, so I was kind of like surprised by this, kind of how like bloated and dated it felt. Like the action, that was a good comparison to bring up Alex, like the Mission Impossible movie, because those have some really memorable action scenes, the new one, like fun car chases. And this, the action scenes were so mediocre.

Like, they just came and went and I forgot about them. Very mediocre action scenes. And those are the best parts of Indiana Jones movies usually is the action. So I was shocked by that. Yeah. Each one of the original trilogy has at least one or two like incredibly memorable set pieces that sit in your mind. Oh yeah. Often the best ones have like a sense of realism to them. You know, they're like clearly using a bunch of real stuff, no green screen.

This all looked like it looked like a video game. Yeah, this one looked like fake. Yeah, it looked like a PS5 game, the whole movie. Yeah, it's like good CGI, but it looks, you know, it still looks like CGI. It doesn't have that great. Yeah, that's the thing. Yeah. Like, I still don't think it's that bad of a film, like, it doesn't come together, but a lot

of scenes in a vacuum are just fine to me and like, they work fine, they do the job, but then just when they're all stitched together, it just doesn't work. Like, it doesn't flow, it doesn't... Yeah. Tell a compelling story, uh, even though a lot of the pieces are there. Like, the characters just suck. Yeah, yeah. They did, like, Teddy sucked, the kid.

That was... That kid sucked. And so did, like, Antonio Banderas is in the movie's fucking... Wasted. Seems like it. It's barely in it. It's like, oh, it's my old friend. Yeah, they should have swapped that kid for Banderas' character. I'm having fooled that role or something. Yeah. Yeah. That was pretty wasteful.

What I felt was really missing from this movie was the cinematography. Because, you know, like Spielberg or not. Like he has, he does a lot of really competent, like, wide shots and like action set piece shots where you can see everything happening and it makes sense how they're filming it and you get a nice visual and it feels a lot more expansive and not like this weird closed contained like really narrow frame shit and it's like even when they're filming the action scenes in this movie like you can barely tell what's going on because it's just so close like you never get a good wide shot yeah not not like bright memorable like even crystal skull

had some good moments with that like I remember when like Harrison Ford or like mud or eating like at the bar there, what steals a drink and then Harrison Ford puts it back. Like, that's like fun. Like, you know, little things like that. And there's nothing like that in this movie I felt. Yeah. And I guess it's just like, yeah, mediocre in a lot of ways. Very, very meh.

Very meh. Very bland. Very boring. And just way too long. Like, how long was fucking Crystal Skull? Shorter than this. Why is every fucking movie so long now? I don't know, but it looked at Temple of Doom.

Temple of Doom's like an hour 58. Perfect. Yeah. Yeah. Film like this. Like, it needed to be some two hours. I like Temple of doing much more now. Good.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I love that movie. I mean, even before seeing this movie, but definitely now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I just don't get the whole.

I thought it was kind of funny in the beginning, though, when Harrison Ford was just like an old man and he like got out of bed in his underwear or whatever. And he's like, you know, he goes downstairs because kids are playing music. He's like banging on the door. Hey, go shut up, you damn. kids. Yeah, threatening them. That was actually funny to me. It's a relatable one for the audience. Yeah, it's relatable and it's like, okay, at least we're acknowledging that he's like, you know, an old man. And that was like, I felt, I felt like the movie should have done more of that kind

of stuff. But it does just kind of devolve into like, well, we got to try to be cool. We got to try to like throw in a ton of action to appeal to the the kiddies out there who watch like Avengers and whatever. And yeah, it just did not work. Like, it felt so dated and yeah. Yeah, it's good you bring up Avengers actually, because that's part of what was like bugging me about this movie is that it's just so out of its time. Like, ironically, with it being about what it is with the dial of destiny and everything. But it just doesn't make sense to make an Indiana Jones movie in this time period. Like, they were so restricted by the concept and by Harrison being 80 years old and all these different things. And like, you've seen decades of films inspired by the pop action of Indiana Jones.

We do have Avengers and Mission Impossible. And we've seen it all, frankly, and like the scale and everything. So it's just too much. Like it can't find any angle, you know, like it even that uncharted movie from a year or two ago that's basically, it's like this weird incestuous circle of like the uncharted games, inspired, Indiana Jones, and now we'd come back to. Yeah. Also with Antonio Banderas. That's true.

True. Yeah. And that film was like unbearable as well for different reasons. Yeah, that was worse than this one even. It was worse. Yeah, much worse. Much worse. Yeah.

Yeah. But yeah, it's just like, you're out of time, I'm afraid. It's just, this just doesn't make sense. No, it doesn't. And I think audiences are agreeing. You gotta know, you the dial of destiny. Go back to the best. Oh, yeah, well, that was, we wanted to just, like, talk about the ending.

Yes. That was weird. Yeah, can we talk spoilers? The last half hour? Yeah. That was so odd that I almost kind of liked it. I should have started that earlier. No, I fully.

loved that. Yeah. I was like, oh man, there's quite a good subversion there. I'm not the only one then. Okay. Yeah, I actually enjoyed that. No, because it was like the, yeah, when, because the villain is, uh, Mads Mucklson, who's like a super Nazi. He's such a Nazi that he wants to go back in time and like take Hitler's place and do it properly. Yeah. That's very funny. And that's like kind of a funny, that is a poppy motivation for him. Um, but like he gets the calculations wrong and then winds up in ancient Greece. Like straight up go back in time. Yeah.

That was awesome. Except he doesn't get it wrong because they found out that it only goes back to that one point in time anyway and that Harrison Ford was actually just talking out his ass. It's one of these loops, yeah. Yeah. It's like, oh, he was looking for help. Yeah. You know, he was trying to get help in the battle.

Yeah. But like by that point in the movie, I was like so checked out. And then when it did that, I was like, oh, this is kind of interesting. This is crazy. And I like the feeling of when the aliens show up in crazy. crystal skull, it's like this. This doesn't gel. This like doesn't make sense.

There's not like the historical angle. Mm-hmm. Yeah, the historical angle. Yeah. Yeah, because they set it up at the beginning where he's like teaching his class about ancient Greece and yeah. Phoebe Wallace whole thing is about that time period. And yeah, so bringing it, bringing it full circle to that is, is kind of fun to me.

It takes way too long to get there. And the way it concludes is kind of a shame as well. Yeah. I was kind of liking like if they were willing to just leave him there. In ancient Greece, that would be kind of a cool ending for me. That would have been cool, honestly. I would have loved that, yeah. That would have been great.

Just like end the character there. The character ends, like, living in ancient Greece. Because it did work for me because it was like wish fulfillment for the Indiana Jones character. Like, he's an archaeologist. He loves history and he gets to like live in ancient. Yeah, it's like his dream come true. Exactly. Yeah, exactly.

I thought that was awesome. But then I guess some studio head came in like, no, you got to end the movie with, you know, he's got to meet Marion again. And we need to be able to make another one. Yeah. We need to be able to make more. Yeah, right. It's like, why?

Like, he's, the dude is 80. Like, you can't make another one at this point unless you recast him. And no one wants to watch that, you know? Yeah, and it's bombing, of course. He's probably sold his likeness to Disney so they can make an AI one. Oh, yeah. Yeah, but no one likes the de-aging thing. And, you know, this movie did kind of bomb, which is crazy.

It did, it made money, but it bombed because it cost so much money to make. Yeah. That's just like, we've been saying this a lot about these summer movies. they cost too much money to make. And this one's like 300 something million dollars. And yeah, like, why do these movies cost so much? They cut the runtime, they'd be cutting the budget. Yeah.

Yeah. If they trimmed out a fifth of the movie, they'd be spending a fifth of the money maybe. Yeah. But it's like you said, Adam, like, they want, you know, more people to spend more time on Disney Plus. So they make the movies, like, inflated runtimes. Yeah. But I don't understand why they don't have, like, extended versions on Disney Plus

and have like shorter ones in the theater, you know, if that's really what they wanted to do. Yeah, that's what they do with the Hobbit movies. Yeah, because like HBO Max is like, or Max now, a bunch of... Because then you have to give people a choice of whether or not to watch the longer one. And if they choose to watch the shorter one, that's the wrong choice. Yeah. For them.

It's too much content. It's too much. Yeah. Yeah, the movie is so long. So they get to the... They go back in time. and I like that in concept, but some of the shit that they showed was just like so fucking cheap looking. Like some of the action moments where it's like, okay, you just obviously sped these characters up, you know, or like it's just terribly framed. It's like, fuck.

Like they're wearing costumes, but like none of it feels real or genuine. Like even without the CG, it feels like so fucking weird and cheap. Like, I don't know what the hell he was doing. with this section, but that was just bizarre. Yeah. And she punches him in the face. And then he blacks in and he's big. Yeah, that really like sapped all the momentum away from that moment.

Because it was kind of winning me over like as it was going into that. And it's like this is this is so crazy. It's kind of working for me. Yeah. And then right, as it's kind of wrapping up and getting to its emotional crescendo, then, yeah, Phoebe Waller knocks him out and then that's the conclusion. Yeah. They should have went into the clouds into the past at like, I don't know, 40 minutes through the movie.

That would have made a better film instead of just like right at the end. That's like when the prologue was wrapping up. I know. Like what happened between the beginning of the movie and then? Like we had a prologue. Then he got captured on a boat. Yeah. And then they tricked Mauds Mickleson into thinking like it was somewhere else because she's

oh I'll just pretend like I know the whole decoding thing yeah that seems that seems kind of dumb they went the opposite direction and mods with his binoculars looks and says they're going east and not west and immediately figures out what they're doing yeah exactly it makes no sense because he's just like yeah let's just follow them and follow where they go yeah so it's like their whole plan is so stupid right you skip to like two half an hour chase sequences as well because that are totally forgettable. Yeah, the whole thing about her getting married to this other guy. And yeah, they chase her through the fucking, and that doesn't go anywhere.

It's almost like they're sending her up to be Indiana Jones. But yeah. The chase sequences in this film, I was getting flashbacks to my experience watching the Jurassic World Dominion where like the chase sequences in this film, I was kind of just like struggling to stay awake. I'm like, this is a sleepy movie. It even looks the same. Yeah, that like chase scene and what, it looks like exactly the same. It's like the velociraptor chase or whatever in Jurassic World Dominion.

I did the exact same thing in this film as I did with that other movie. I went and I grabbed the beer from concession in the middle of the movie. There are two movies I've done that with, maybe in the past decade. It was Jurassic World Dominion and this one. I was just like, I'm not really missing anything. Oh, yeah. Let me just mention this while I remember it. So there was like this couple they walked in when there was like 20 minutes to the movie left.

I have no idea like why. They like walked in with popcorn and concessions and everything and they sat down. They were early for the next one. But they must have thought they walked into the wrong movie because they see like, you know, like Roman times or whatever like you know, the ancient fucking battle. There must have been like what? I thought this was an Indiana Jones movie. What the fuck is this?

What the hell is going on? Yeah. I don't know. So silly. I did enjoy that. part that was kind of you know so dumb that it was fun and but then yeah they just kind of like they negate that by the end of the movie and just becomes the same crap yeah you kind of soured me on this yeah because I think I would I think I

liked it more watching it than like now but yeah there's not much I remember about it not much action that's like stands out or character moments no like those those other movies have great like you know even just like dialogue scenes character moments of great shots. Even Crystal Skull has those. Yeah. So, yeah, I've really soured on this movie. Yeah, there were one or two character moments.

I didn't mind. Like, um, you mentioned the whole mutt death thing. Things are in spoilers, I guess. I didn't, I didn't mind that scene where Phoebe Wallace is asking. Like, what would you do if you could turn back time? I'd have it so mutt didn't die in the war or whatever, you know, that was, that was okay. Um, but again, yeah, it's just too much of it. Way too much.

You could just, you could come at this with a. pair of scissors and trim an hour probably out of this and it'd be just kind of fun and okay because I thought parts of the chase scene in Morocco were kind of fun but by that point is that you're so exhausted already and it's like the goals really aren't changing enough like they're just you know why the fuck was the opening scene that long I don't know why like well for what purpose it wasn't fun wasn't exciting no yeah it's like fun for 10 minutes, but then it just keeps going and going because it's like, yes, establishing the McGuffin, it's establishing Indy's relationship with the British guy who's Phoebe Waller's

dad. But that's kind of all it really needs to do and MADS as well, who gets like hit by that on the top of the train and... Yeah, it gets hit in the face and then like they never bring that up. I thought that he would have like, you know, be missing an eye or some huge scar or something, but yeah, they never really like... Yeah, like a cool scour or something. Yeah.

But yeah, they don't really, yeah. Like there's just like so many scenes, yeah, then I would cut out. Like, there's this scene like Mads Mikkelson has food delivered to him in his room. And it's like, you know, it's like an African-American man so he's like racist to him or something. It's like, okay, did you really need that scene? That's right, yeah, because he helped, he helped the Americans get to the moon, right? That's like why they're helping him. They're using his science, his Nazi science.

Yeah, it's odd. And then like the CIA agent. that just like gets killed like halfway for the movie. It's like, all right. Like, there's like so much shit in the movie that like I like just remember just now. Or like even the whole opening, there's like, like it starts with like Indiana Jones. He's like he's getting hung. But then there's a bomb that comes through the ceiling and I don't know.

It like goes on for so fucking long. You can't even remember like certain scenes. They just like gloss over in my brain. Yeah, it makes you feel late years old by the time it's over This movie didn't really need to be made It didn't really need to be a movie Yeah, that's why I couldn't escape Yeah

Could have been like, it's honestly long enough to be a mini-series I don't know That might have been better There were kind of less member berries than I was expecting as well On that room Yeah, that is true Yeah, they had like three Yeah

Oh, eels are like snakes This belongs in a museum Yeah, this belongs in a museum Yeah, this belongs in a museum He says it like twice. I have the same hat. It was really simple. Yeah.

Yeah. So do either of you have a definitive answer to whether or not this is better than Crystal Skull for your own perspective? I don't think so. At first I was thinking it was. It's pretty even. Yeah. It's like about the same.

Maybe I think I like Crystal Skull more. At least it's the people who like made it, like messing it up, you know? There's like a different patina over it when it's like this gross like modern day Disney and like all these people trying to mimic this thing from the past, you know, there's like a whole different thing. It's bad in like a different way. It never like I guess the highs are kind of higher in Crystal skull and the lows are lower. This is more just kind of boring right down the middle. It doesn't really move the needle at all. Like you're never emotionally invested enough to even get upset at a fridge scene or swinging through the. jungle with the monkey's scene. Like, it never goes that far. But it also, like, never has anything that interesting going on either. Except for that ending, which was, which was fucking wild. Even the ending, it's like, it's like a breath of fresh air of like, oh, you're finally

doing something. And it's not really pulled off well in any way whatsoever. It's like, it's one of those, it just, it feels better because the rest of the movie was so boring. Like, oh, thank Christ, you're doing it. Yeah. Yeah, something's happening. Cool.

Like, removed from the context of how boring the rest of, you know, it's just, you know, of the movie is, it's not like, it's not that crazy. Yeah. It would have been cool if they just did it earlier. I don't know. Like, just start the movie that way so that you have like a better jumping off point. Maybe have more of the film. Like, do fucking Ash versus Evil Dead or some shit, you know?

Just do something crazy. You've got, it's the last movie you're making anyway. You might as well just fucking do it. What are you scared of, you pussies? What are you scared of? You cowards. Well, that's what I was scared of was with this whole, the whole doll of destiny. like time travel thing. I was scared they were going to be like de-aging jumping into the old

movies or something awful like that, you know? Like, that would be like worst case scenario. Yeah, multiverse. Yeah. And they luckily didn't go that level. But yeah, never really justifies its own existence either. All right. I'm done talking about this one if you are. Yeah, is there anything else of note? Like what else even happens? That's kind of the whole movie. There was one scene. The score is John William's score. We didn't even mention. John William's score because there's nothing to mention it. Yeah. It's just like recycled.

They played the main theme at the beginning and then the end credits. Yeah, it was quite disappointed by that. Which, I mean, is good for me because I thought it was spammed in the other movies. But yeah, it was really unnoticeable throughout the entire movie. Like, do something at least. I love the music in the original trilogy. Yeah. I love the theme.

Yeah. Yeah. And there's just nothing really memorable about anything. Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's kind of just wasted in this movie. And yeah, like Karen Allen, like, yeah, you could have done something worse. she was in the movie more and they go back in time. That could have been fun.

I don't know. Like with her, but she's like barely in the movie. I think she said she wanted to be in it more. And she's like, I don't know why they only asked me for one scene. I would have been in it. Like, yeah, like, what else she got going on? You could have, like, thrown around. She's only in, like, one scene at the very end.

I don't know. That was kind of a waste. The whole movie felt like a waste. And the Sala character, you know, Gimley, when he shows up. Yeah. I love that actor. He's got, like, he has that poppy fun presence. But he's only again, just kind of sprinkled in a little bit.

Yeah, right. I would have been fine with those member berries. If he went on an adventure with him, that could have been fun. Like the two old men, that could have been something. Yeah. Sure, why not? But instead, you got Teddy. Amazing.

Who? Amazing character. It's so memorable. Yeah. There was one part that kind of bugged me from like a weird logic, practical sort of thing. They like kidnap him and then they're going into the protest. and he's like trying to blend in with the protesters kind of and then he punches them and then he you know ducks into the crowd and their response is like okay we're going to shoot the gun once into

the air and then everybody like fucking video game NPCs just like ducks without doing anything and then indie's like oh no and he's the only one standing and they're like ha ha there he is it's like I don't know if you fire a gun in a crowd surely there's some people that are going to like run surely there's some people that are going to panic or something. Not everybody's just going to like duck and be completely silent and not move. Like that was fucking weird. That was like a video game moment.

Like I don't know. That just, that's so awkward. A lot of, a lot of video game moments in this. Yeah. Yeah. I think it was trying to be funny as well.

Like, it just doesn't know. They could have thrown a short round in there. Yeah, I was just thinking that. Could have like an old short round in the movie. That would have been cool. Yeah.

Honestly. That would have been cool. Maybe they couldn't get him. Maybe he was busy. Yeah. That would have been great. It was like, yeah, old short round, old indie and, you know, Sala and Marion going on an adventure. But, like, yeah, it's just throwing them.

Like, it's already like a nostalgia bait movie. Like, you might as well. Yeah, yeah. Like, who even cares, you know? Who cares? I guess, yeah, that's kind of why I'm not even that upset because we, the nice ending of the trilogy was already ruined by Crystal Skull anyway. So it's like, well, I guess it's just another one. Cool.

whatever Yeah down the drain Nice But it's such a waste Because like you can't make another one after this Unless you get a new actor Which is a

That's a waste too They Just fucking get short round To continue it okay He's 30 years younger He's still old also But Drenches of short round

Yeah Yeah like a spin off Yeah That would be fucking cool If you did short round To continue Indy You know how fucking cool that would be

I think we're ready I think we're ready I think people will be into that, yeah. I would be into that. They could have set that up in this, yeah, but they didn't. They didn't set it up. Instead, they got the fleabag woman who was not that great in this movie.

They should have set that up. Damn. It seemed like they were setting her up to be indie, but I'm like, please don't do that. That would not be a good idea. Yeah, I was scared they were going that way, but yeah. They always could. And Kathleen Kennedy could be like, yep, love it. We'll see.

The AI would do it. Yeah, the AI will do it, or Kathleen Kennedy. Mm-hmm. D.A.'s Kathleen Kennedy is Indiana Jones. Like with Star Wars or whatever, you know, like, you don't need like Harrison Ford to make like a Star Wars movie. You can like make spin-offs of Star Wars because the world is so expansive and like, you know, there's tons of characters or whatever history.

This is like, you know, like you can't have an Indiana Jones movie without Harrison Ford really. He's like the central focus of everything. So you can't really do that and if you try it kind of like falls apart. And they're corny adventure serials, like, it just, an old man doing this stuff just is crazy. Like, it doesn't, it doesn't work. It's not fun to watch, you know? Yeah, exactly.

I'm giving this one a four out of ten. It's the same that I rated the other one. It's, uh, don't remember much about the, the crystal skull, but I guess I landed on the same number. Um, it would be more of a disaster if I was, you know, that hyped about the original. films. I think they're fine. But yeah, this one's just very much worse. I'd give it a two and a half out of five, man. I wish I could rate it higher, but it's just not that special. Yeah, I'm right there with you, Ralph, from the two and a half star. I just imagine the crystal skull in this movie is like just old Indiana Jones fever dreams and the actual ending of the movies is the, uh, the sunset

shot from the third crusade. That's where it ends like in my mind. I just forget about these. They're Just a waste of time. It's a bad idea from every angle you look at it. And it's really not that surprising that it's kind of bombing the way it has. I think it was like a team of a hundred animators just on the de-aging stuff alone. It's like, why are you doing this with your money, man? Yeah, such a waste. Bloated budget, bloated everything.

It's just such a dumb idea. Why didn't people come to see this movie? Why weren't they excited for it? Why? What? They just asked a bit. Yeah. It's a bomb! They're wringing that flannel would so dry. All their IPs just, man.

Are we done with old men? Yeah, they're like, don't listen to the critics like it's Goddy. Yeah. It's fucking Indiana Jones, like it should be doing well. I mean, come on. Ideally, yeah. Yeah, such a waste. Yeah, like no one cares. I mean, it's like, yeah, the dude's 80. That's a saddest part, yeah, it's just like come and gone, like in a weekend. No one cares. Yeah, yeah, right. There's so much.

competition out there, right? It's shocking they thought this could like compete. And like, I think Elemental's doing better probably. Yeah, I think you're running. So at least it's like, you know, for kids. It's the only kids movie that's out. So it has like that and that fucking cracking movie that bombed horribly. But it's really like Elemental is the only one.

Elemental's not even do it. Like there's these weird fucking really deceptive headlines coming about out about Elemental. Like Elemental is Pixar's, uh, highest grossing film since Frozen 2. And it's like, okay, that was directly before, that was directly before the pandemic. Okay?

Like, half of the movies they released between, most of them, they dumped on Disney Plus, right? Of course it's doing better than those. Everybody's like quote tweeting this. Like, whoa, I thought it was doing bad. Apparently it's doing great. It's like, this is very deceptive.

This is just a way to fudge the numbers. Yeah, it's all this deceptive headline. But yeah, Frozen 2 is not even a Pixar movie. That's Disney animation. Unless the headlines said Disney animation. That is a weird thing to say, yeah. Yeah, unless it's just said Disney movie. It's like the highest grossing Disney animated movie, maybe.

I think they said, eh, I think they said Pixar, but that is a weird way to phrase it because that's not even a Pixar movie. You're right. Well, that's just, that's not even deceptive. That's just wrong. Yeah, that's just incorrect. That's just factually incorrect. That's very funny.

Yeah. Yeah. It's just so you can see the 300 million on the screen a lot more with like the latest Mission Impossible, which is like a similar length and similar budget. And yeah, it definitely pays off more in that than the 80 year old man running around. For me, it's just hard to see. Yeah, 300 million on any movie at this stage. That's just like a crazy amount of money.

It's eye watering. Yeah, yeah. It's so inflated. It's so insane. I don't know what is going on with that. Yeah. I think just like everything costs more now. Yeah, that new Mission Impossible was, it was good.

I walked out toward the end. Yeah, I watched it, but I had to walk out toward the end because I felt sick. But I'm going to see it again. Yeah. Got like a little stomach bug. But I watched like up to like the, when he like does the big stunt where he like drives off the cliff. Yeah. So I miss like the last half hour.

Yeah. It's good though. It's a good movie. Very exciting. Like great chase scenes. I love that chase in like Italy. I was into it. I still think Fallout's better, but...

Yeah, especially compared to Indiana Jones, that like whole chase. Oh, yeah. Yeah, all the fun gimmicks. Yeah. It was really fun that scene. Awesome movie. Is it awesome in the same way that the last one was awesome? Yeah.

I mean, I don't feel like... I don't feel like you'll think much differently. I don't know about it. I do like Fallout much more. Yeah. Yeah, I thought that was better. Yeah. Oh, you thought, I like Fallout more too, because like the whole Henry Cavill

villain character was interesting. Yeah, I watched Fallout again, actually, Alex. And with my mom, I watched it on like my TV. We loved it. I like it much better now. Yeah. Like the first time I saw it. Yeah. I think that's really where it's going to peak as a franchise. Yeah.

That and like the Brad Bird one. Those are my two favorite. If I could just like take Mission Impossible Fallout and watch the action scenes and then just like go to the other room and make a sandwich during the non-actual. scenes you don't like the Alec Baldwin scenes what are you talking about yeah perfect time speaking of Alec Baldwin we had a film recommendation from Ralph a double feature yeah in a week yeah called boss baby yeah Alec Baldwin before

he killed someone yeah before he put someone with a gun no here's the question are they making a bus baby three and is it going to be without him right they could do it without them because that uh that secret life of pets like you know louis c k's in the first one they recast them with patten oswald in the second one yeah so they just get another fat comedian yeah it's not like the target demographic would notice if they swapped out all of the voice actors pretty sure he's not in the bus baby Netflix show or something right i'm gonna make a wild guess let's see oh yeah there's like two spin-off shows Totally forgot about that.

I should have recommended that too. Well, I'm glad you forgot about that. Did we not watch all that? Because I watched every episode of those as well. Back in business, back in the crib, Christmas bonus. There's three of them, apparently. I feel left behind now. And it is not Alec Baldwin in Back in Business.

And I don't see Alec Baldwin in Back in the Crib. and I don't see Alex Baldwin in Christmas bonus. So, that's usually how those spin-off shows go, is they just don't cast the name actors. It'd be too expensive. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, so, Boss Baby, what is there to say? Oh, yeah, well, you should describe the movie. You should describe the plot.

What is it? What's Boss Baby? It's about a boss baby. It's about, well, really, if you like want to actually talk about, like, what the movie's about. It's about the boss baby's brother named Tim, who's played by Toby McGuire as an adult, which is funny. I did not expect that. It said Toby McGuire in the credits.

And it's about him. And then the parents get a baby who's the boss baby. And it's about them not getting along and they're like brotherly conflict, I guess. But the way the movie sets it up is so bizarre. It doesn't make any sense to me because it's like the baby comes. in through like a taxi cab he just like shows up at the house one day even though you see like the mom is pregnant but like the mom doesn't give birth to the baby they aborted the other baby I guess that's that's what that's must have been what happened I mean because it doesn't make

because like you see you're pregnant then the next scene the baby just shows up in a taxi and then there's like this whole thing or like I guess in like some like baby land or heaven or something in the clouds. They like they sort out the babies and, you know, some babies are normal babies, but then some are like too intelligent. So they sort them into like a different category where they like dress and suits.

Which is determined by if they're ticklish. Yeah. Yeah. That's right. If you're ticklish, you're dumb. Yeah. Yeah, right. He's just a normal baby.

And then, but if not, you send you in a suit to work for like a corporation. And like it's like, obviously like convoluted to where it's supposed to be funny and it could like almost work. But that's just kind of like the whole movie. Like it almost works, but it's just not very funny, which is the problem. It's just like it doesn't make sense. And it is it's like absurd humor, but it's not funny absurd humor.

It just makes me more confused by the whole like premise of the movie. So it's so lowbrow. You know, you probably could write some funny jokes. And that one where they're going through the sorting process, I get I guess the joke they're trying to make is like if you're humorless then you go into management you know that's like kind of the joke they're making with the boss baby thing yeah but Adam said already about the target demographic but like who actually is the target demographic for this movie it seems like it's only the parents of of like little kids yeah it's not a kid's most of the jokes

are like they make like HR jokes like where's HR when you need them you know and it's like what kids is going to get any of this is clearly for the parents but then I don't know, I got like a bunch of younger cousins, they're older now, but like, man, they hated like baby imagery, you know? They like how to train your dragon and cool stuff, you know, things like, something they can look up to. It's not for kids. No. It's literally, it's literally for moms. And then they drag their kids to the movie to justify to enable them going.

They just use their children as an excuse to watch a movie about a baby. And they're like, oh, this is for my kid. No. as soon as you're old enough to even understand what a movie is you don't relate to babies anymore you don't like it when someone calls you a baby right like that fucking Nathan Fielder sketch

is like oh you don't want to be a baby you better have this toy you better have the doinquet I don't want to be a baby like that's that's that's the number one concern of children ages 2 through fucking 13 is not being called a baby right yeah they don't want to watch a baby movie

they want to be an adult it's like one of those saccharine like Facebook mom like minion posts as a movie, you know? It's like so corny and it's just loads of like baby butts and like nappies. Yeah, lots of baby butts. Yeah. Just the stuff like moms would love. That's it.

Yeah. Yeah. And the second one has like Shawshank Redemption references. It's like what child- On the references man. Yeah. That's my least favorite part of this movie. What child has seen Shawshank?

Let's keep the second one in our pants. until we get to it. All right? This is a discussion about the first film. Yeah, keep that in your diapers. Yeah, keep that in your diapers. Yeah, the references are just like,

what kid is supposed to get this humor because no kid has seen these movies? Like, you know, at least like the Toy Story movies, they reference like Star Wars or whatever. Like a kid might have seen Star Wars or at least it's made for that demographic. It's like, who the fuck? Like, yeah, it's made for adults, really,

at the end of the day, which is not. mom's good and grandma's it's and the humor is just like so lazy yeah grandmas would love this yeah it was hard for me to even get into the premise of it because it makes no sense the reference stuff man like I've got to say it has maybe the most annoying bit side character like in any film ever that that alarm clock Gandalf thing oh my god annoying like unfunny they just he just keeps saying Lord of the Rings references that's it that's all thing oh my god hey get it, I'm Gandalf. What are they doing with that?

That was atrocious, yeah. Fucking eight times. Like, until the end of the fucking movie. That's the only joke, that's it. That was atrocious. There's no other point. Is it a joke even? Like, it's just, it's not a substantive.

It's a reference. It's literally just a reference. For mom. Maybe for that one's for dad. That might have been the worst part. No, the dad one was the Elvis references. That was for dad. Elvis said.

Oh, Elvis said. Oh, yeah. That was for Bos Lerman. Yeah. That part. Yeah. There was actually an Indiana Jones reference as well in the movie. I forget.

Remember that? They're like in that, they've got to do the thing India does in the crusade with this. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Right. But like the kid's not going to get that.

Yeah. There's a lot of just ancient shit. They had a reference to Mr. Magoo. You know, that's a, that's an old. old person thing. They had a reference to Julia Child. Yeah. A reference to the mouse trap board game for millennials who are having children right now. Oh, the $6 million man. They had that sound effect in there.

Yeah. Yeah. Lots of references, no substance, bad jokes. And, uh, yeah, just, uh, I don't see a single thing in this film that kids would like. You know? I don't see a single thing in here that it's like oh yeah kids would love this other than it's just like brain rot and it distracts them for a bit yeah that's why I think they'd like it I think because kids are pretty dumb so you could just like put on whatever for them like that it's that kind of movie it's it's it's manic they're absolutely manic these movies so I don't think any shot last longer than like one second you know there's always just something crazy going on they're doing crazy exaggerated faces all the time there's always motion there's

always crazy colors. I guess that's what is for the kid audience just to be like bamboozled by what they're seeing. It has the exact opposite effect on me. The entire movie just bounces off my fucking brain. It's like the reverse Synecdochie New York for me. Like, I don't absorb any of it. But there's like this forced sentimentality with like the brother and their like relationship.

Yeah. Like, oh, they actually get to love each other by the end of the movie. Oh yeah. Yeah. And it gets really dramatic between the second and third. third act where they hate each other for 10 seconds. That's a, that's on the checklist, so you have to do that. So the second it hits the hour mark, yeah, they've got to fall out for a little minute.

Yeah, they miss the plane. They're like, I don't like you right now. And then it immediately resolves itself. Yeah. Yeah, the pacing is bad for it because like the whole movie basically wraps up and then it goes on for another 15 minutes or so with like the little epilogue there where the baby goes back to his corporation and realizes he, you know, we love it. his brother and he goes back. It's like, it's so long. I was watching my brother, we're like,

why is this going on so long? Like the movie's over, like they defeated the villain. It's like, what is this? Yeah. Well, like the, the boss baby's motivation is that he wants a corner office with its own nice bathroom. Yeah, golden toilet. Yeah, kids are gonna love that. They're gonna really relate and understand that. Yeah. Like, it's, it's infuriating. It's legitimately infuriating. that I needed help understanding the fucking plot to this. I was like, why is any of this happening? Like, it just bounces off my fucking brain. Oh, yeah, it doesn't make any sense.

Yeah. It's so not important. But I think the point is that it's so absurd that it's like, oh, you're stupid for trying to find logic in it because it's like all absurd humor. But it's not very funny, like absurd humor. Exactly. It doesn't go absurd enough to be like interesting. It's just dumb.

Yeah. It does be kind. dumb and not in a way that people people use the excuse like oh it's dumb because so kids connect to it it's not even dumb in a way that kids would connect to it like no one's connecting to it no it's just it's the plot is just there it's only explained out of obligation it's not there for any artistic reason for any person in the audience you know like it's literally just uh we got to pretend there's a motivation here somewhere yeah because it can be done like if you think about something like monsters ink right that's pretty absurdist but they they like set up role

You know like they turn laughing or beer into a currency and they have like all this fun action and they're stakes They present it in a way that like kids and adults can yeah Stakes and has Steve Bouchemmy as a villain too The villain is just oh yeah yeah Yeah, God again he's so uninteresting he's like he's like a used to be a boss baby but he's like He can drink the milk that deages you so he's got a chip on his shoulder about that so he invents a A type of puppy that can't age because there's a limited amount of love in the world and in the pie chart of love,

he wants pets to overtake babies, so no one has babies anymore. Yeah, and the, sorry, sorry, that chart, it was like 10% cats. I thought cats would be like a little bit. It was like the same amount as like, I don't know, like snakes or something, like some other thing. I was like, no, cats would be a little bit more. It would be like at least 20% or something. I don't know. It's a little thing I noticed.

The movie would have worked better if instead of babies, it was cats. If the whole plot is like we got to stop dogs from being the cute. It's literally the same plot as that movie Cats and Dogs. Remember that shit? It's the exact same plot. But they replaced the cats with babies, which makes the movie worse inherently already. And that's got Toby McGuire in it too. Oh, yeah.

You're right. Yeah, there's a lot of similarities. Yeah, it's all just linked. It's all just the one thing. But like, this is all bad, right, in and of itself. But I have the budget on this. 125 million for this. Yeah.

Crazy. Is that more than Spider-Verse? What is it? Yeah, it is. Yeah, yeah. In 2017 as well. So, like, that much now must be like 200 million or something. But it made half a billion dollars.

Sad. So it was like, no one connected to this. Clearly, someone did. It's like, where did that money go? Like, it, I don't know. A couple of, like, creative scenes, I guess. From the name actors is where it went. The seven-year-old boy, the, uh,

He keeps having these, like, he's supposed to have an active imagination. So they kind of change up the art star now and again, make things a bit more extreme. But again, they don't lean into it enough. It's just like little vignettes here and there. The majority of it, like these chase scenes, like the one in the garden or the one through town. Like I was really looking at the backgrounds. They're the most like boring flat, like the, they've got no detail. They're totally out of focus.

Yeah, it's like those despicable me movies. Like, yeah, they really felt like that. Reused assets. Yeah. Definitely. Oh yeah. And then every imagination scene was like an excuse to have really low polygon, simple texture. Yeah.

Simple colors. Yeah. Wow. Like every imagination scene. They're like, we're not going to draw in background characters. Every person in this crowd is going to be a stick figure. It's like, okay. Because it's imagination.

I see. Yeah, exactly. Good excuse. Uh-huh. And then the rest of the movie's happening and it's kind of like heavily implied that it is as imagination even when we're not seeing it through that lens because like, you You see the chase scene in the backyard. And then the parents look through the window and it's like, okay, through their perspective,

he's just going like half a mile a year or whatever. Like, he's going incredibly slow and just dragging onto the back of it. It's not happening the same way that we're seeing through his perspective. So that's the heavy implication, which gets thrown out of the window in the second movie, which I guess we'll talk about it a bit. But like, so that's not, I don't even know what they were trying to imply or if it matters at all, which I guess it just doesn't. and nothing matters and it's fine because they don't care.

They tried to frame it as like, it's a story. It's a story older like Toby McGuire, Tim is like telling his daughter. So like the logic of it is like confused and like over the top, I guess. Unreliable narrator type thing. Yeah, that kind of thing. But yeah, it doesn't really like work. Like it doesn't make sense. Yeah.

Yeah, there's just like a little more logic to it. Like I get the absurd thing. But like just like a little bit more to like ground the movie would have definitely helped. There's something to care about. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For sure.

It's all just like nonsense. Character sucks. Really. Character suck. There's no real stakes. Like who gives a shit if puppies are cuter? Yeah. All the jokes, they're like, they're the extreme sides of like the spectrum, right?

There's one one side where it's like the lowest common denominator, slap jokes, fart jokes, just baby being gross jokes and then it's like promotion jokes or like the stocks are crazy today and like a Long Island iced tea joke and it's like it's so extreme with that stuff

it's so like it's a family movie that's only for adults it's crazy the people of Long Island do not know how to make an ice tea right yeah not to sound like a dad or whatever yeah there's some humor like that and even just like the conflict of the movie where it's about like this older brother who hates his younger brother I'm like

this character's an asshole like when I got a younger brother I loved him like you know like I enjoyed having a younger brother I don't get why this character is such like an unlikable like oh I hate my brother it's such like a bad message for kids it's such like a bad thing to show them

yeah I agree because like kids will imitate what they see in media so when you're presenting a scenario like that some kids will just do it because they think that they have to I think that people are wildly wildly irresponsible with child-centered media and what is shown to children. I think that people are just to have no fucking idea what they're actually doing.

It's mostly just adults making things for themselves and using kids as an excuse. Yeah. That's how kids get like weird fetishes like that. Yeah. Fart fetishes. Yeah. Yeah. They all weird shit.

Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. People have no idea what's going on. People have no fucking clue. Mm-hmm. Yeah. That child psychology.

Yeah. It's like important. Yeah. We're all just, we're all just kind of doing this experimentally and then like, you know, another generation goes by. It's like, oh, shit, why has everybody got these weird fucking fetches? Why are those increasing? Oh, I have no idea. Why does everyone have a foot fetish after watching like Dan Schneider stuff?

Yeah. Yeah, I wish I could like hate the movie, but it's such like a meme. Like, not even the movie itself. Just like the poster. is a meme and like I would just like I don't know I feel like you just throw this movie on for like kids some afternoon it would be fine like that's like the purpose of it really my kid yeah I just like yeah I don't know like I don't really hate the movie I just like I'm so indifferent to it I hate it I think it's socially irresponsible and I want to lock up the people that made it I think that

they should be behind bars starting with Alec Baldwin lock them all up oh yeah lock these people out. And Jimmy Kimmel. Get Jimmy Kimmel in there as well. Holy shit. I can't believe I forget of it. Jimmy Kimmel. That pissed me off. I was hearing his voice act that I was like, who's this voice? It's very annoying. Yeah, come on, son. Who is this? Yeah. Holy shit. Yeah, super lame. Cast all the worst people in a movie except Toby. Toby's free. He can, he can, he can stay out of prison in my dictatorship. But Steve Bishemi, he's got some goodies. Yeah, but he didn't try it. So he deserves to be in jail for that performance. It's a smaller sentence.

Yeah, we haven't mentioned the director here, Tom McGrath. You know, he's responsible for co-directing all the Madagascar movies. Oh, yeah. Mega Mind he did. Yeah, it did Mega Mind. Those are the big ones. This is some of his worst stuff, though, this. This and the second one.

Yeah, this is definitely his worst stuff. Obsessed with his slap jokes, though, that the Madagascar movies have loads of that kind of humor as well. Everyone's just slapping each other all the time. That's the one joke they got. Yeah, yeah. That's odd. If it ain't broke. Bad impression.

Mm-hmm. Bad impressions for kids. Yeah, that's the thing. Like, it's nearly on that level to me where it's so bad and like such an insanely terrible idea that it's almost there, but it's just, it's just so boring, man. It's not an ugly to look at and like irritating. It feels like those like ADD TikToks like strung together, like even though it's made in 2017.

It's like... Yeah, that's why I think kids would like it. It doesn't make any sense. They're just like, oh, it's for kids, who gives a shit. Yeah, it's main joke is the, it's the deep gruff voice of Alec Baldwin on a baby, and isn't that so hilarious? That's like the whole thing. He's known for playing adults. That's why it's funny.

It's an adult boy's on a baby. He wants to do business. He wears a suit. That's funny. Yeah, that's like the whole... But it was like a meme, though. It's so unrelatable for like a little kid. The most unrelatable.

Like there's the bring the kid to work day bit and it's because the boss baby's parents are working advertising. Again, like other concepts like, do you think a little seven-year-olds know what like madmen is and the advertising space? Like it's just bizarre. Do you remember near the beginning of the movie? There's like that part where all the other babies show up and he's. He's like going down the stairs and then the one baby has like scary green glowing eyes and is like a dead baby zombie for like five seconds and then he snaps out of it.

It was like white eyes and like a dead face or whatever. Like why, who's that for? Briefly. Yeah. Like that happened for a little bit. But it was like a genuinely like, okay, that's just going to scare children. Who's that for? Oh yeah.

No, I know you're talking about. Oh, ha. It was scary for a second. Like what? What, think about, think about what you're doing. Think about what this movie is going to do to people when they watch it. Like, why would you want to just needlessly traumatize a kid like that, even if it's just for like five seconds? Like, why would you want to do that?

Oh, and, um, whenever that phone showed up, the one from Skinnamarink, I just kept thinking of Skinner, rink. Yeah. I was like, oh. Yeah, forever changed. That's all I had to add to that. Yeah, this is your dream work said it's worst you know like Monsters versus aliens kind of tier where it's like it has nothing to it. It's just like a string of references and a bunch of like the lowest common denominator jokes. They got a Mad Max Fury Road reference in there as well.

It's just like cool. Yeah. Nice. You referenced that one. Cool. I'm glad you did that. That really adds to this experience. Yep. Kids have seen that movie. Rated R movie. Yeah, and it's like a baby like making an espresso martini. It's like crazy, but not in the awesome ways. It's just, it's so, it's just too much. It's too much. Just chill. Yeah, you can still have something that's like stimulating and kind of like ADHD and fun,

like the Lego movie. The Lego movie is fucking awesome. It's great. You know, you don't need something to have like a lot of, you know, fake sentiment mentality and like you know you don't need something to have like all these strict rules for the universe you can kind of just be like oh you know like what if what if things functioned like it was you know someone playing with Legos or whatever that's fine right that's all you need right like the boss baby like I just I I hate how they how they explain things and how it doesn't matter and so it's like okay why did you even explain it and then nothing matters anyway and the consequences don't matter and the characters don't matter and the characters don't matter and ultimately nothing matters and the movie's boring and it's bad and it's just a lot of baby butts And that's it's crazy amount of baby butts well Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah if you took those exact images and some like Twitter artist made that exact same thing

They'd be like fucking cancel like it'd be like why are you drawing Why are you fucking posting that shit like people don't want to see that Yeah, why is that what's in your imagination? What are you doing? But it's funny. It's funny for the moms. I guess so. Grandma loves it, yeah.

Yeah. It's a baby butt. Man. I'm sure you guys love the Hans Zimmer score, though, right? He definitely made this. Oh, it was Hans Zimmer. Wow. Holy shit.

Yeah, it was Hans Zimmer at his best. Hans Zimmer does like everything, yeah. He's got such a range of quality. I am, I've heard down the grapevine from like people. in like music industry in colleges and stuff like it's like a well-known secret allegedly I this is I'm not saying this is factually but backed up by anything that it's a well-known secret that Hans Zimmer just gets like a bunch of his like students to to do a lot of the scores for his shit his intern yeah yeah he runs this business through his academy where like he doesn't really compose

a lot of the music he's credited for and so he's like that would explain a fucking lot honestly Yeah, they would explain a lot. Allegedly, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That sounds about right. It would explain a lot.

It's just like his understudies to like, yeah, do it for him. Yeah, he's got this like this whole fucking thing, maybe allegedly. Yeah. Why would he waste time with like boss baby? Yeah, exactly. He composes the stuff he like cares about like interstellar or whatever. Doing or whatever, yeah. Yeah.

So there's, okay, so let's go. Let's think about kind of closer towards the ending right now. So they do the whole men in black thing without, I mean, it would have been cool if they used the men in black things as a reference, but they kind of just did it without directly referencing. Oh, the memory wipe things. Yeah, they're like,

you will forget about having a baby, which seems kind of morbid. Yeah. And for some reason, the babies, like, to the brother, they ask him permission. They're like, would you like to forget about the baby? He's like, nah, they're like, okay. So it doesn't really mean.

Like, I don't know what kind of the fucking operation is here. I don't even know why, like, it matters that people don't know that the babies can talk. Like, why this organization is in secrecy? Like, how did it start, right? Because you're saying the entire point of the organization, if I'm not mistaken, is to combat dogs being cute, but that the dogs being cute situation as a problem only started recently. So what was this? Like, it seems like you have a lot of infrastructure here that existed before that was a problem.

I don't know how this started. Yeah, what are they doing? What are they doing? Where is it, is it like, is it in VR with the baby soothers? It doesn't really exist? Because it showed before you were born that you were on a real conveyor belt and something. Is there different planes of reality? And yeah, you can also like, you can like just close your eyes and you're,

ghost will appear there and like you can like look around without interacting with anything and like no one will see you that's like a thing they set up i don't it's like why it doesn't make any god damn it's it's all in tim's head it's all in toby mcguire's imagination he's made it up in his story i guess they told his daughter that's why yeah so don't don't try to find logic in it Yeah, the tease at the end of the movie was just like, ugh. Well, clearly, they were saving all of these threads to explain in the sequel, obviously, guys. Exactly, yeah. That's what they were thinking.

Yeah, the incredible boss baby. They probably sat up for a trilogy, but the second one bombed. Or I don't think it, I think it underperformed. Yeah, I just, you know, it's whatever, this movie. I really like that song, Blackbird singing in the Dead of Night, but now I'm not sure I like it anymore. Well, yeah. It was really corny in this movie.

It was so... I maybe died for a bit when they played it at the end. Yeah. They kept playing it. I was like, okay, you know, I like that song. They're kind of butchering it, but whatever, it's just in here. And then the way that they kept reincorporating it to the point where it was like, oh, now this is going to be like some weird fucking bullshit sentimental thing,

like at the very end of the movie or like the... the climax or whatever like oh you gotta get him off the thing the baby i like i don't even fucking remember how it was used i was just like i just yelled shut up and i fell on the floor yeah i wrote in my notes towards that point just i can't stay focused on this shit that i was like so tuned out at that point like i couldn't even like pay attention like it's just so there's nothing it's simultaneously wants to have that emotional resonance but also be completely absurdist and everything's just a stupid meme you know Yeah.

It's such like a cut and paste like structure too. Like everything about it's like you know like yeah, writers should be paid more except for the writer who wrote this movie. Except for whoever wrote this movie because it was like such a lazy hack job. Yeah. This must have been one of those afternoon jobbies, you know? Yeah. Like they wrote the wonder after this in an afternoon and we're like, cool.

Right. Who cares, you know? Like whatever. Exactly. Like the concept like the boss baby. That's all you need. Just make it up as a go on. Just throwing a bunch of dumb jokes.

Just the anime is improv and just do wacky poses. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So at least there was that. One out of ten. Hated it. Cancer. One out of ten.

Yeah. One out of ten from me. Just that smug face they always be pulling with the boss baby. They're doing that lip thing. Smug little baby. Motherfuck it. Little bitch. One star.

I give it a two out of five. So I like that more than you. Because yeah, there's some fun, like, animation and yeah I would throw it on for kids like one afternoon even though there's there's horrible messages in it but whatever hopefully they just like forget about it at some like it's just like something yeah we can only hope waste time yeah I guess just for like reference right this is 2017 some of the competition with animated movies Captain underpants they released that year

Dreamworks as well way better than this so much better than this the emoji movie Despicable Me 3 cars 3 Coco and the Lego Batman movie. So that's the kind of space we're talking about. It's pretty low out of all those. You know, there's some shit in there too. Yeah, yeah. It's probably, yeah, Cars 3 is probably better.

Yeah, no doubt. Did you guys see, somebody posted this in my subreddit. There's like some test animation footage. And it looks like they got pretty fucking far. There was a movie that they were working on that they canceled called L-A-R-R-I-N-S. Oh, I saw this. The Australia one, right? Yeah, and it was apparently scrapped in favor of the boss baby.

And it's like, looks better. Like, it looks better than the boss baby. Yeah, it wouldn't make boss baby money, though. I'll tell you that much. Yeah, it probably would not have made that. Because apparently this film like just dominates on streaming for whatever reason. It's like just always like in the top 10. Yeah.

At least in the UK that I was reading. It's just like wedged in there. A lot of moms searching up the word baby. Yeah. probably thinking that they'll find content to put on for a baby and then that'll be the first thing that yeah right that's basically what's made for it's made for babies who like can't discern like a plot or like any kind of like anything yeah it's basically the demographic for the movie yeah it's probably it's probably great for google search results actually yeah you search a baby you know

baby movie yeah look up baby movie whereas yeah larikins probably wouldn't have you know yeah too honestly yeah I'd be, I would, I would raise this a point if this was called the baby movie. You know? Like the B movie? The baby movie. I feel like you get more mileage out of, if you started with the title, I think you'd get a better concept if you just started with, okay, we're going to do the baby movie.

Like, what do we do from here? It's like the Lego movie, just babies, you know? I feel like you could make something entertaining and interesting. That's not the boss baby. Yeah, I don't got it. It's just the whole management business side. That's the craziest part to me. Like, include the spy angle, spies in disguise or cars two or whatever.

Like, kids can understand that. This is just, it's like, it's boring. I know that's supposed to be the whole joke, but it's just, it's dull. Kind of like a stock market allegory almost. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's true. That's, yeah, that's definitely true. It's like, yeah, why do kids care about business?

It's not like a, it's not compelling. Yeah, right. So stupid. And they use. It's so stupid. The writing is on their level where like, the line fart poop duty is like said early on in the movie, right? And they call back to it later on as if it's like, yeah, this is the calling card for this movie. People are going to be buying like the plush and they're going to be pressing.

The t-shirt. It's going to be saying. Yeah. Fart poop duty. That's the one. Yeah. Yeah. The writing is so bad.

It's so. contrived. Would you, I feel like that would be something that you would put on a t-shirt for jar. I feel like that's a jar-branded thing. Yeah. But that would actually be funny. Yeah. Give me $125 million to make that. And then, yeah, I don't know. Like, what, like when the villain showed up in the movie for the first time, like, you're not supposed to know it's the villain, but I'm like, oh, that's the villain. Like, I call it, like, right away. Yeah, they didn't even try to hide it. It's so obvious. Yeah, exactly

Yeah And like you know Monsters Inc does that much better And I don't know It's like the reincorporation Like with a handshake Do like a special handshake I'm like oh that's gonna come into play

At the end of the movie They're gonna do the hand And then they do It's like ugh I hate stuff like that When you can like see it coming From like a mile away It's so like it makes me cringe

Yeah it's like the formula It's like the plug-ins It's all just like automated It's a checklist Yeah they definitely wrote this In like a weekend Yeah it's like effort putting this shit no but these must be the best for them you know like you're just

you have total freedom to just make like complete shit and it doesn't even matter what you make because it's like you you have your 125 million in the bag and you got alec Baldwin who cares that's how it feels like it's just who cares yeah right there's something liberating about that it's why I like it more than you guys I like the I like the total nonsense of it yeah because at least it's like yeah like toward the end it starts getting like more into the plot again it got boring again but yeah it's it's just so fucking crazy that I'm like I don't know I wouldn't mind showing this to like some kid I would never show this to anybody as long as they were my kid not a random kid

not like Ezra Miller kidnapping children when I am dictator this movie is becoming one of the burned books You're first to go. It could be a lot of media. Yeah. Big pile of boss baby Blurays burning. That was a lot of alliteration right there. Yeah.

That joke dancing in the fucking film. Yeah. I write a song about boss baby burning. Boss baby burning in the... Yeah. Please. Yeah. Yeah.

All right. Well, I was just right. referencing stuff now like like boss baby uh there's a second movie thank Christ we watched the sequel and boss baby back in business right is that what it's called sorry yeah the family business family business i think you'll find family oh okay whatever more alliteration yeah uh yeah there's a sequel for some fucking reason because it made well it added actually added a lot to the movie you add a lot of context to uh the first film and uh it's uh it's uh It's James Marston this time, right?

Instead of Toby McGuire. Yeah. Because why not? I thought it was Paul wrote at first. He sounds like his voice is so similar to it. It could have been. It might as well have been Paul. Yeah.

It could have been fucking anybody. Yeah. Why not? And they like, so like at the end of the first movie, they become adults. Like that's like a big thing about the end of the first movie. They're like adults now and they have their own kids. So it's like, all right, how are they going to write it so that their babies again? or they do like a flashback or something.

But in this movie, they just like drink the baby formula from the first movie and it like slowly deages them. So like Tim, because I was thinking like, okay, so if they both drink the formula, they'd both become babies, right? And that could have been like maybe sort of interesting if they were both babies. But like they slowly deage like as they drink it. So Tim is the same age as he is in the first movie. And the boss babies, you know, baby, like, by the time they're drinking the formula.

It's funny that they just kept the same character model. Yeah, because, yeah, then they would have to make a new character model. This movie has a lower budget than the first one. It's 80 million. That's because they reuse all the same shit. It's like the same house, like the first 40 minutes. Yeah. It looks much better, though, than the original.

Yeah, it does, but it's all the same, like, assets. Like, you know, it's like the, you know, it's all the same character models and the character stuff. and I don't know. Yeah, it's even the same story pretty much. Like, but to me this is basically what the first one should have been, but it's a bit more appropriate to its audience, you know? Really? I just go like this one more.

I think this one's like significantly better. Really? Yeah. Which isn't saying a lot, but... I thought this one was worse. Really? I thought this one was actually much worse. I thought this one was boring.

This one was actually fucking painful. This one was boring as fuck to me. Really? Yeah. This one at least had a few. few things that kind of kept me a bit more interested, right? Like, and at first at least, like I mentioned the first movie, um, the whole business angle and them going to this like advertising firm and all this stuff kids would not understand. At least most of this movie is like

set in a school, you know? It's like a framing that like little kids could at least relate to and understand at the very least. So this is still pretty basement basement level. Yeah, but it's like a, it's like a robot school. It's like a robot futuristic. scores. It's like controlled by like I don't know. Yeah, but I guess you're right. And you got what, the Jeff Goldblum villain who's kind of the same concept as the villain from the first movie, except he turns out to actually be a baby. I kind of enjoyed that villain as far as how he's presented. He's like in a mech suit for some reason. He's just animated in a way more interesting way when he's when they're in like the classroom and he's on this, it's this weird little like

robot TV screen that's going around and it's like missing out frames and it's all I don't know it's at least something you know I'm contrasting this to the first movie right like this is still garbage uh it was it was at least something I didn't mind that I thought his performance was fine annoying like annoyingly written um but at least wasn't as grating as some of the stuff in that first movie um the reference stuff at first like for the first 40 minutes or so I was like man they've really they it was even kind of self-ful deprecating. They like kind of make fun of the first movie a little bit. Um, when his daughter is talk, he's talking to his daughter about the story of the first movie. And he's like,

at least the jokes were good, right? She's like, nah. So yeah, I don't know how intentional that was or whatnot. Yeah. I don't know. It seemed like they actually kind of at least made a movie appropriate for his audience here for like a fraction of the first one's budget. Um, and yeah, the reference stuff was way toned down. They still, I was, I was, I was, like in a ball on the floor when they pulled out that Gandalf character again, but he wasn't as annoying. Oh, I thought he was so, I thought he was worse in this one. I guess he's not in it as much, but... Yeah. I don't know. I just can't. I don't understand. Or the other self-deprecating joke as well, the, uh, they make fun of Dreamworks a little bit with the, the, you know, the spirit

horse movie. There's that one guy in the theater. That was a weird reference. Fucking stallion to the Zimmerin? Yeah, it's like weirdly self-deprecating. Yeah, he's wearing 3D glasses. Wasn't expecting that one. Yeah. Yeah, that's actually, it bombed, so there's one guy in the theory. All right, that's actually, that's not bad.

Yeah, like that's a better joke than anything in that first movie, you know. Yeah, like I said, the Shawshank references and whatever. I don't know, like, is a kid supposed to have seen that movie? There's, you know, there's stuff like that in there. That just kind of threw me off. And yeah, it was just so fucking boring. It's kind of interesting because Hun Zimmer scored this one as well. But the music was very different.

A lot of the references in this film were in the music. And they were like more subtle. Like they play the music from Shawshank. Yeah. Yeah, there was like a great escape kazoo kind of like similar thing. Yeah. Yeah, there was another, I forget the other one. I wrote on my notes, but like,

Can't find it right now. I'll bring it up later. I don't know. It was longer than the first one. Oh wait. No, yeah. Here we are. They literally, they did a soundtrack of,

they did a parody of the Brazil soundtrack. That, I liked that. Oh, did they? Okay. Yeah, they did. When they're first introducing themselves into like the, into the, like, office environment and everybody's kind of like running around.

It's like a, it's like a, it's a parody of Brazil. I even know. It's very subtle. Yeah, I didn't even know. I didn't twig that. Because it's in the sound. track and it's not like a like ooh they're doing the same notes but they're doing they're they're playing it's the same instrumentation and the same tone so it's like it's really the the references in

the soundtrack are really only noticeable for like music people which i kind of like yeah it was it was more subtle in terms of how they were doing the references so that was interesting to me yeah that's Crazy. Some of the like imagination scenes are a bit better too. There's like a trial scene, kind of like the wall. I'm like grasping its straws here like trying to pray because it still is. It's the same it's the same foundation they're building on. It's just like a tiny as bit more stable than the first one to me at least. Like the chase scene through the city much better than any of the ones from the first movie with like the callbacks. to all the characters from that first movie. They really, like, treated it as if, like, yeah, we really want to see all those elements come back in somewhere. You've got to see the Gandalf toy. You've got to see the classic triplets, you know,

and all the guys you remember from that first movie. Yeah. Yeah. I just thought the movie was so boring and, like, redundant. Like, you know, you have that first movie, fine. Like, it didn't need any more. elaboration. Like, there's just nothing for me you can do with the concept past, like, the first movie. And they just, like, let's, let's see, like, what we can, like, throw together.

So, like, throw in the school and I don't know. I felt like just like another episode of, like, a TV show where you have, like, all the same characters and just throw them in a new scenario. Yeah, it's the same thing. Yeah, I get what you're saying about the school, like, that being relatable to a kid. Like, that's a great point, I think. But yeah, I was just so, you know, I'm not really a kid, so I don't really care. And yeah, it was like, the whole movie was so redundant to me and just not funny and fucking horrible, which is like what the first one is. But it was something particularly about this one.

Both movies are absolutely horrible. But I feel like if I were to judge this in terms of what it's trying to do, if it's trying to be like a kids movie, I felt like this one was a bit more like stimulating in terms of like, what's happening in like the different sets and like there was a weird fucking like miniature horse that just showed up and left and came back and look for some scenes and like it's like an ongoing joke yeah yeah and like there was there I don't think there was significantly less maybe not any uh baby butt in this film I found myself being less like disgusted at what they were doing I found myself being less like why would you show that like

I was less actively pissed off sure it was born I also like Amy Sedaris I like Amy Sedaris I'm glad to see her do more things Yeah, it's the other boss baby yeah She's in like Mandalorian too Yeah, Bojack Yeah she was like you know She was fine

I think like maybe the first one had a little Like the conflict was a little more Like a parent Like the whole brother conflict And this movie they just get along But who gives a shit about that? So it's not there's not really like any kind of like Driving force to like the

plot for most of the movie until like they introduced the villain like later on but a lot of the movie just felt like aimless to me it was just like going along it's way too long it is incredibly boring but that yeah a villain came in was when I was kind of more engaged to be honest yeah yeah I kind of yeah sure and the you know his daughter character there I wasn't too engaged in her story either I just felt like it was so like oh we gotta go to you know she's got to do the singing pageant and he's got to sing this the big song and whatever.

I was not really engaged in any of that. And it got kind of like, super, like, weird and disturbing in that one part where she, like, she finishes her song and the whole audience is just,

like, quiet. It's just, like, dead silent. And she's, like, breathing heavily,

like, looking at all these people, like, in the shadows. And it's, like, this really uncomfortable moment. I was like,

holy shit. This is, like, a fucking, like, lynch film all of a sudden. Mm-hmm. It's so bizarre, that scene.

It was also kind of, just uncomfortable the whole like the de-aging milk shit you know like where he's yeah I thought they're gonna almost go for some weird um Freudian back to the future thing where he's like dad was like de age talking to his mom and like having all these weird scenes and there's a scene later in the movie where she's like oh my god I told him so much stuff and it's like what the and the narration at the end like digs at it as well like that was weird It's just just just just the whole idea, the whole premise, yeah, didn't need it. Yeah.

But at least this to me was like them kind of correcting some of the stuff that giving like the slightest little bit more depth, you know, like at least the villain here, you know, he's got a little bit of an arc. It's like wrapped up with a bow. He like goes back to his parents at the end. He's got that. I can remember at least some character traits. He's like always eating sugar in every.

scene like a death note or something. Mm-hmm. Yeah. But, you know, still irritating. Alex is really, he's really selling me on this movie. I like it. No, I don't, I don't like it any better. But, you know, I just like, I just found it completely boring, whereas the first

one was just like nonsense. And I could get along with just nonsense as opposed to like actually trying to make me care about like these like this boss baby concept. and like these characters and it's I've just you know the first movie did it all it didn't really need a sequel and it just felt so pointless to me and it was just so boring yeah it did do it all yeah it did like nothing it's it was attempting to do nothing and it did that really well you know it was really like I felt I felt watching this movie it was like a breath of fresh air in the first like at least 10 minutes just because Alec Baldwin wasn't in it

and it was just like Amy Sedaris on the other characters. I was like, oh, okay, like fuck. Yeah. That's not put Alec Baldwin in the movie at all. That'd be nice. Of course he comes back. And so I was like, okay, whatever. That's the hook.

Yeah. I was disappointed in that. And then I got more disappointed as it started going towards the end. Because there were just weird fucking like, I don't know if you guys caught this or not, but Jeff Goldblum, when he was like trying to scream in the final part of the film, he was like, ah. Yeah. I don't notice it.

Like, it's held back. Like, are you just a shit actor and we've just liked you because we like that you play the same character every time? He just doesn't care. I just, yeah, he doesn't give a fuck. Yeah, ah. You don't even know how to scream. You're holding back your performance.

Come on. You can't even scream. Eh. Ah. But that's something I didn't mention in the first movie. Like, there's some notably bad voice acting. Whoever does the Gandalf toy just awful, like little bit parts on TV and extras, they all are noticeably bad performances, like really bad. And yeah, Jeff Goblin, he's not great, but whatever, I mean.

Yeah, he's Jeff Goldblum. He's the boss baby. Yeah, he's just, I'd rather hear that than I guess, I don't know, I would be more. True. Yeah, I felt like people wanted to see the boss baby, though. you know then and there's no boss baby in this movie till like 25 minutes in the movie like it takes so long to get to the boss baby you got the go boss baby I get you guys hate the boss baby but I do a lot boss baby yeah yeah there's there's a couple there's a couple issues

I had with this film that are a little a little me but uh we have the there so the Jeff Goldblum he's like on a TV screen that's like going around the classroom or whatever and it took a while for me to figure out like what the actual implication was with what they were showing visually because it was like oh okay it's it's like kind of got some glitch effects like a weirdly low frame rate like it's stuttering like it's struggling to to display the feed or something but the background image behind him in the same within the same TV frame was not glitching

at the same times and it didn't have the same frame rate it had like a smooth frame rate the entire time while he was just glitching in the foreground and I was like well what's the implication here like it didn't make any sense like you should glitch the background with the foreground

like the two layers were separated it didn't have a cohesive effect that was annoying to me I really hated the when they were trying to explain like oh yeah you know you know that saying infinite monkeys on a typewriter well we have a factory of babies making apps it's like well that's not infinity you don't have infinite babies doing it and you don't have infinite time you fucking like this is a contained environment taking place on planet

earth with a contained amount of time that's not how this shit works you don't even understand what you're saying you don't even understand what you're referencing and so yeah that was annoying. Yeah. Yeah. But what can they even do? Like, what motivation could like baby characters possibly have? Like, the stun lock by their own concept. Like, what can they even do? Should have been cats. Right. That's why, there's just no reason to like elaborate. Like, just make something fucking stupid. Well, the, the villain's motivation is that he was too smart for his parents and he's convinced because the, I guess, the, what, the plasticity of a baby's brain is like smarter is like his logic I guess

he's got like a bunch of babies working for and making apps and the apps like hypnotize adults yeah and he wants to control the world that's his yeah that's a message of the movie get off your phones kids get off your phones and live in the real world yeah which I guess this could be a good message for kids but yeah it's just like so on a phone on an iPad yeah yeah I mean that is kind of contradictory yeah it's like

a fight club. It's like against like Hollywood and whatever but it's like a Hollywood movie. That whizzy guy his name is James McGrath who plays him. I wonder if he's like related to the director. Oh it's probably like his brother or something. Yeah, something like that.

That's like what I'm thinking. Yeah. Yeah that makes sense. Yeah another Tom McGrath masterpiece this one. Yeah this is really bad for me. I just saw this was fucking painful. Fucking painful this one. Oh my God. Well, it's like for me, it was a double bill, like feature sit down like three hour,

well, four hour boss baby marathon. So for me, it was like, it felt newer. Even with that lower budget, there are only a couple of times. I was noticing that motion blur, interpretive frame thing. A lot of the cheaper animated movies do. A lot of illumination movies do. I guess they're under the same banner now, so they're probably sharing animation tricks and tips. So I don't know.

But yeah, I thought it was way better visually compared to that first movie. Yeah, that I could see. Even though they've reused a lot of the same stuff, like the character models or whatever. It did, yeah. Yeah. The rendering. And like the jokes, yeah, they're garbage, right? But I just, it was better to me.

Like it wasn't doing the, it didn't feel as like Facebook mommy. I mean, it still definitely did, but like not to the same degree where it's like that's all it is in the first movie. There's like nothing. Yeah, this felt a bit more bland somehow, you know? Yeah, it had like a bit of a broader appeal. It felt a bit more like just a bad kids movie instead of like an exceptionally disturbing. Immoral. Yeah.

Piece of crap. Yeah. All right. I could concede a little. It's got like a musical number and stuff like that. That was weird. Oh, I hated that with the girl singing. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I hated that. That was terrible. That's like something original. I can point to, you know, whereas like, it's just like a string of references to other movies in that first one, you know, whereas he says something. They wrote a song, you know, I can give them that. It's not a good song, but they did do that. Yeah, it's just wasn't a good song.

It felt like more work was bitten. Maybe. I can definitely see your point. And with that Gandalf character, like in that first movie, he is just, from the word go, it's just references to Lord of the Ring. And like that they're weirdly restrained with him in the second one until they just had to do it like they just had to throw out the you shall not pass thing. It's like I don't even remember them doing it in this movie, which is kind of funny. I think I was checked out. Yeah. It's like they were holding it. It's like they're one trap card like the waiting. It's the ultimate gag at the end when they're all the adults are zombies. And that's another they just bringing back all these things. Jimmy Kimmel comes back for that last little, well, it's all. old Jimmy Kimmel this time. Yeah, yeah, he's a grandpa. Grandpa Jimmy Kimmel. There was less Jimmy Kimmel in this film and less Alec Baldwin, I think. I think I know why. Yeah, there definitely, yeah. There was less Alec Baldwin. Mm-hmm.

Be like, I feel like people wanted to see the boss baby. Bring on the boss baby. I want more boss baby. I was like, where's the boss baby? So I can hate him, but... Where's the baby? There was a steroid joke. I noted that down. I'm drinking the de-aging milk at the beginning. And I had Alec Baldwin's like, I think some guys at my gym take this. That was a joke.

Yeah. That was a good one. It's a good one. It was at least some humor that wasn't like business humor, you know? Yeah, references to movies, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. All right.

You guys really sold to me on this. if we're going to get into ratings Yes Yeah I get what you guys are saying to me There's just I could not get over the fact that I was watching a boss baby two The whole time

And I was just like yeah fuck this movie This is a I give it a One and a half out of five So a half star lower than the first one And I think I prefer the first one Actually to this Okay

It's just shorter and it's just it's fucking nonsense like I could put that on I guess I could put this one on for kids like kids will watch anything really it's just like just show them fucking anything I guess yeah both of these are fine movies for that that that fuck you feeling you got from this one I got from the first one you know so it was like improvement from the shit but it's still shit they're both definitely bad yeah we're really like grasping like we're splitting hairs here definitely Yeah. But I don't know, like, I still think there might be worse DreamWorks than this home.

That's a particularly bad one. Never saw it? I've ever seen that. Rihanna. That one, that one's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, we did, we've done the DreamWorks movies before. I figure these are like some of the worst. Like, Shark Tale's probably worse.

B movie might be worse. Yeah. Oh, B movie? Yeah. I think I, I think I prefer B movie to these. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know.

This is a very low two star. Four out ten. So you loved it, yeah. It sounds like I loved it. Yeah. Yeah. This movie feels, these two films, feel weird in the DreamWorks catalog. Because for the longest time, and I think I've been corrected about this, an infinite amount of times and I just keep forgetting.

I would just assume this was like a Sony animation movie and not DreamWorks. Like, it doesn't feel like a DreamWorks movie. in terms of like what they're presenting conceptually and then just how cheap the animation looks and like Jesus it really doesn't like they were making other shit around the same time period that was not like this horrendous so it's just confusing kung fu pandas 2008 yeah yeah boss baby the first one is 2017 yeah house screen your dragon 20 10 those are those are much better it feels like a new animation studio trying to compete not like an established one that had already made like several films, you know,

trilogies or like how to train your dragon and shit, you know, like, fuck, it's so, it feels so weird in their catalog that I just keep forgetting it's actually a part of it, which just get rid of it, dispose of it, you know, get fucking burning. Erasing. Yeah, the fact that they tried it made it to make it like a franchise is like insulting to me. It was successful enough that they had to, I guess. Yeah. What was fucking crazy about this is the first movie got nominated.

for an Oscar for Best Animated Feature because they just love just throwing in random like whatever was popular that year sort of thing and I think that the reason that they did original songs in the next in the sequel was because they were probably writing that high and just being like well we were nominated for a fucking Oscar for the first one we might get some original song nominations

like if we just do a bullshit out of song like there's tons of movies that do that right so why not? That seems to be an explanation for me. Yeah. It's a con-nominated boss, baby. It was literally not a year for an Oscar. Yeah.

As it deserved to be. Yeah, I'm giving this one a two out of ten. It was refreshing. It's a refreshing breath of fresh air. And not good. It was really bad. Two out of ten. Yeah.

Yeah. Can't stand. It was less cringe than the first one. But still pretty fucking cringe, yeah. It's still really bad. It's just insulting. It's insulting that a Boss Baby 2 even exists. It's insulting that a Boss Baby 1 exists.

Let's be real. Yeah, but at least you could go like, all right, it was a mistake. You know, they made their money. Like, okay, I get it. You know, boss baby. It is crazy to like double down, yeah. Yeah. And then they made a second one and, like, I don't know.

It is, it is insulting. Playtime is over. Yeah, play time is over. That's right. In June 2021 during a Q&A with Alec Baldwin and Amy Sedaris, a third boss baby film was announced to be in early development. But his murder or manslaughter or whatever we're going to call it happened in October. So that was after that. So who knows?

I couldn't get that out of my mind when watching this. Like, man, that's an insane story. Yeah. A mob boss baby. This industry is fucked, man. He should have served some time for that. I don't know the exact details. Wasn't it like the armorer like messed up or something on set?

There were unsafe conditions that he was responsible for as producer. There were a lot of things that... Oh, was he reducing it as well? He was also producer. He wasn't just the person that pulled the trigger. I wasn't sure if he was just acting. Yeah, yeah. Mm, yeah, that does that complicate it.

They were like, they were using the same gun for like, real live ammunition for target practice in between shoots for no reason. Wow. They're like just a lot of just insane shit that just should not have happened. And they're kind of like, yeah, well, you're famous and it was an accident. So, okay. He should have gotten like at least a slap on the wrist for the murder, manslaughter or whatever. Yeah.

As producer on the film and the unsafe scenarios that led to that death. Yeah. Yeah, definitely. He was responsible in some degree. Yeah, what a crazy situation. Whatever. Question time. Yeah, let's do some questions from the Sarduncast community.

Head over to the suggestion thread on the subreddit if you want to leave questions for future episodes, just like creationary did. Recent Disney slash Pixar movies like Elemental, Lightyear and Strange World have flopped while movies like Spiderverse, Person Boots, and Mario have done well at the box office. Do you think it's, of course, Disney slash Pixar to change their approach? to movies. No, they'll just make another toy story. Yeah. I think that's really confirmed, isn't it? Yeah.

Isn't that what they thought with like indie? I don't know. Toy story people will fucking watch though. Toy story, it doesn't even matter what it is. People just continue watching Toy Story. That's one that they've got in the bank. As long as it's not Lightyear then. Yeah.

It has to say Toy Story. It has to be like a Toy Story movie. Yeah. I'm supposed I didn't call it a Toy Story story story, light year, you know, or something. Yeah, that movie's a fucking mess Was Light Year a COVID one? I'm kind of surprised that one didn't do better. Slightly after.

No, because you can't really argue it with that one because that was like after, you know, no way home, which was a huge hit. Yeah, you're right. And like, it's around the same time as Top Gunn. Well, think about it this way also. Like, the trailer for Lightyear and the marketing for it, they're like presenting it as this weird,

dramatic, serious, like, space adventure thing. And it's like, okay, even if you like Buzz Lightyear, A, not the same voice actor B, no dynamic between him and Woody C, C, like it's supposed to be like a show Within the fake universe already And like, it's not the right tone Yeah, it wasn't even like the cool cartoon from the 90s

Yeah With them marketing the film Anything that anyone would like about Buzz Lightyear They wouldn't get in that film anyway So it's no surprise nobody fucking watched it Yeah, I suppose I had no word of mouth. Also, it went woke and two people kissed him. Yeah, that too.

But it just wasn't a good movie either. Yeah, that was shockingly bad. Yeah, I mean, the Cracken movie bombed from DreamWorks. But that was them trying to make like a Disney movie. Or at least satirize it, maybe, like with Ariel. Yeah, didn't have enough babies farting in it. Yeah. I didn't have enough baby butts.

That was the... Yeah. issue with that yeah dream works has always been like the low brow one and now they're making better stuff like that Puss and Boots movie and you know stuff like that yeah how's train your dragon and all this yeah yeah yeah well seeing as we're kind of on this humble wind says a big reason why recent Pixar films have flopped is due to the fact they actually pay their animators relatively fair amounts of money compare this to spiderverse which apparently had awful working conditions is it worth it that better movies like spreeks

Spider-Berverse and Puss and Boots are being successful even though they treat their work as poorly, while more generic Pixar movies are not being successful due to the fact that they actually financially support the people who do the heavy lifting. What do you think of this? Yeah, that's true. That's probably why Elemental costs so much. I don't think you have to choose one or the other. I think you can have a good movie and pay your animators. I don't think there's any reason why you can't have a good movie and pay your animators at the same time. But that's why like Elemental costs so much. That's why all these movies cost so much now because they're paying the at they're paying everybody more like it's a little more

balanced and fair um but it it makes it hard to make money you know yeah i mean if it's fucking unsustainable then maybe think about what you're creating like you can't really like yeah you can't really take a risk as much if you're like spending you know 300 million on a movie but yeah i don't know well like you know spiderverse right they could have made the same movie and just paid their animators more and it would have made money like you know because it made that that made 500 million take the budget of Craven the Hunter and uh different between the animators and just yeah use your money a bit smarter yeah but that is true yeah I want animators to be treated right they're very I mean they should unionize

unionize well they were unionized when they were like 2D animators but now they're not considered animators they're considered visual effects artists so they're not union. Yeah, exactly. Which explains why the trend went in this direction, really, in that cynical way. But what Disney used to do, like, so the budget of the original Lion King is like 45 million. Like, we ingest that for inflation or whatever. It's probably still going to be under like 100 million, right?

So I'm assuming, like, even with them being like unionized, which is my understanding of that at the time, I hope I'm not spreading information. Like, that budget was still lower. Is it simply just the method of animation that is caused? this? Like, or what's, what's changed? Like, what, why are, why are the budget so high? Like, yeah. Are Pixar animators making that much more than all of the supposedly unionized animators that worked on the Lion King and all these other projects? Or is it the runtime? Like, what is the runtime of Elemental? Let's see. Because the Lion King was 90 minutes. Elemental, only 11 minutes longer

than that. Something that really sticks out when you look at like Disney Renaissance films, I rewatched The Little Mermaid before, you know, watching the remake. And it's a really short movie, hour 23 minutes, like less than an hour and a half. I wouldn't mind, you know, if it helps make these projects more sustainable and more reasonable to create and make money off of, I wouldn't mind shorter movies. There's nothing wrong with a shorter movie. Just tighten up the script? Yeah.

You know? I always champion short movies, yeah. Tighten up the script. Absolutely. I don't think Elemental was that long. I think it was like an hour 40. Yeah, it's an hour 40. But yeah, I was going to say there should be an editor's strike at this point because these

movies are too fucking long. No more editing. Yeah, I think the entertainment industry has just a lot of issues, huh? A lot of numbers that don't make sense. I was like, where is this all being funneled? Like what is actually happening? Yeah. Where's this going?

It just doesn't make sense. A $300 million dollar Indiana Jones movie? It's like what what is going on? Why does the boss baby cost $125 million? There's probably a lot of money laundering. Would be surprised. No doubt. It's probably a lot of shady shit going on.

Probably a lot of expenses that aren't really being spent on the movie or some shit. This one's going to management. A lot of money going to producers. Yeah. A lot of money going to producers, right? Which I wouldn't be a surprise. Got all the boss babies in the building. Yeah.

Yeah. Limo trips. Uh-huh. Yeah. Do we want to talk about it? the writer strike stuff because there's kind of some interesting stuff that's been happening. Yeah. You've seen that video of Ron Perlman basically making direct threats to Bob Eiger?

That's pretty insane. I haven't seen it, no. But I saw like the story. It was on our Reddit. I haven't watched it, but what does he say? He's like, well, so he essentially says he makes like a little Instagram or whatever video of him talking to the camera. He's really serious and stern and like kind of fucking scary.

And he's like, listen. Yeah, Ron Perlman's scary. Yeah, and so he's talking about, he's like, so without naming him, there's somebody that we know that's making like $27 million, $270 million a year off of creating nothing. And you thought there are demands were unreasonable and you think that people should lose their houses? Because literally, like Bob Eiger, I think it was like in a billionaire's meeting or something when he said this. He's like, oh, yeah, their demands are unreasonable. So our plan is to just wait until they have to come crawling back to us because they can't pay their rent or whatever. Like he was literally just saying out loud like oh yeah that's our plan and so Ron

Perlman is like you think people should lose their houses there's plenty of ways to lose a house and we know where you live it was like oh that's fucking you have poor sons of anarchy yeah holy shit I have a feeling he might get blacklisted at some point I don't I don't fucking know how many strings Disney can pull to blacklist him from everything maybe he'll only be showing up in like indie projects from now on I don't fucking know but geez sure he'll be fun he was kind of scary and then I think Sean Gunn made like a more palatable less controversial

video on the subject and he was essentially just saying like okay the the average CEO page 50 sorry the average CEO wage 50 years ago was 40 like 30 30 or 40 times what their lowest paid worker made now it's like 400 there's something wrong

with that and it's like yeah I agree like you know there's there's a lot of people looking at the situation and being like oh what, fucking writers, a lot of them get overpaid anyway, or actors, like, they're all rich anyway. It's like, this isn't just for the top people making money in Hollywood. This is, even if, let's say, every single writer and actor was doing fine and they weren't in any kind of financial crisis, and there wasn't like huge inflation and rent crises, especially happening in, like, Los Angeles and shit, if let's say every fucking actor and writer that this

affected was entirely well off, I would still agree with them, because the people hogging all the fucking wealth are just the people that own the properties and it shouldn't be rigged to this extensive of a degree. Yeah.

The pay disparity is ridiculous. It should be more reasonable. Like, the Overton window has shifted so far that what we accept as normal is not fucking normal. It's not fucking normal. This is extreme

and we should have been complaining about it and doing something about it fucking 50 years ago when it started happening. Like, holy shit, this is really late stage shit that we're talking about.

This is not normal. and it shouldn't be normal. Yeah. The pay disparity is way too much. Yeah. It's ridiculous. And, you know, I can agree that, like, you know, an assistant editor is not as important of a job as an editor.

They have more creative input in the movie, so they should be paid more. But not by that much. It shouldn't be, like, yeah, 400 times. Like, you know, what an assistant editor makes or what, you know, like an animator makes, like, one animator working on the movie. It's not the same as, like, a creative director or, you know, one of the, those jobs but you know there needs to be a little less of a disparity for sure I mean it's not even like I feel like most people would agree with that there are

like residual problems as well right like yeah I think I saw something being shared of one of the oranges the new black actors like sharing their residual paycheck and it's like 20 dollars or something insane yeah that's what's insane about it is like especially because of streaming that's why they're protesting is because you know the the contracts that they've had for these films, you know, there hasn't been anything that mentions streaming specifically and anything that does mention streaming specifically. The amount of money that they're making off of each click is just so much worse because of course that's how things work. You know, as soon as there's

an excuse to change things, it won't be in their favor. It'll be in the favor of Bob Eiger, who could realistically take, like, I don't know, a 50% pay cut and his life would be no different. right? Like, oh no, oh, I can't buy a second island this year. Like, what do you, what do you, why are you hoarding everything? Your lifestyle isn't going to fucking change. Like, what are you doing? You're not spending all that money in a year. You're just hoarding it. You're piece of shit. Yeah. Yeah. No, I've mentioned it before. In our lifetimes, it went from billionaire status being like a comical, literal comic book trait for Batman. And now it's just like our reality. Like, there's just a bunch of, of them and they just own everything. It's like nothing left. They buy Twitter on a whim. Very useful. Yeah.

And speaking of that, man, I opened Twitter the other day, right? And like the main tweet that was the top of my timeline, it was a pirated French copy of across the Spiderverse like the whole movie. Yeah. Pretty good quality. Like, yeah. It's just like, what is going on? Yeah.

The website's like mostly bots at this point. yeah it's yeah it's terrible that site and it's like you know you open up twitter on the main page usually Elon Musk posts i've blocked him so you know it's just like it's it's i got sick of it well i mean like if you go like if you go an indigo mode right you just go to like twitter dot com and like you the top post is usually an Elon Musk thing it's like his spaceship that blew up yeah sharing his like Eldon ring build or whatever he's doing whatever game yeah right it's just it's just like a promotional tool for him now.

It's his own truth social, which, you know, Trump made his own website so that he could just be the main character of it and now Elon bought Twittered so he can do the same thing. Yeah, so you'll be the main character. Just defeat the egos.

Exactly. Yeah, very useful. It's a public town square. An internet town square, whatever fuck you said. Yeah, he fucking destroyed. Unless you say the word sis, apparently, which is going to get you ban.

Oh yeah, you can't say that. That's a slur now. Yeah, that's a slur. Which is fascinating. Yeah, that is actually fucking crazy. Yeah. What a crazy story. That was in and of itself.

Man. Would they rather be called cisgender? Is that the thing? Or are they just don't want to like have any classification? And they're just like, no, I'm normal. I'm not anything. Yeah, they're just normal. And yeah, they're normal.

Like, is hetero a slur? now? Like, is heterosexual a slur? Is that, like, or if you're being consistent, then that would be too, right? Like, I don't understand what you're saying. Right? Straight people are normal. Everyone else is gay. Everyone else is gay. Yeah. People thought he was like Ironman as well when he first, like, was appearing on podcast and stuff. So, like, cringy. There's some really funny YouTube content that aged like milk of like people being like

this guy's the Iron Man it was a it was such a Reddit thing at the time you know like just everybody just circle drinking oh he's gonna save those Chilean children that are lost in the mine yeah yeah yeah and he just called someone a pedophile

he just called the guy a peter for that's right yeah exactly you make my idea don't look good you must want to fuck the kids What are you talking about? He's such a joke now. It's so insane. Yeah, he's a total joke, yeah.

That happened to a lot of those guys now. He's got this whole army of fans on Twitter, and there's this particularly, like, cringe tweet that I've seen, like, shared, um, relating to Spiderverse. It's like, you know, it's, you know that shot in Spiderverse where, like, Miles, he's got his arms behind his back and he kind of, like, falls into bed. Like, the phrasing of the tweet was,

something like my last few seconds existing as Elon Musk and Elon Musk's body right before I come back. Some green shit like that. Like just imagining themselves as him. Like, no, I think, I think that was like him jumping off the building. Like, like, the joke was he jumps off the building and then he like, you know, Elon Musk comes back into his body and then he like falls to his death. I think that was like the joke actually. That'd be fine. I might be wrong, but I think that was it was more like a diss at Elon Musk I think that might be wrong have you seen those like creepy weird accounts of people photo like they're doing these weird I guess AI created images of like what Elon Musk would look like as a child and then they're like this is what his children

would look like even though he like has real children but like that are that are not associated with him anymore. They've cut ties with him. Yeah, they like hate him. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, there's these people like, oh, this is like the cutest little girl. And it's like just Elon Musk's face on like a four-year-old and they're all sharing this

fucking, it's like grandma Facebook shit. It's on Twitter now. We've gotten everyone's grandma's on Twitter now. It's the grandma verse. He must love that stuff as well. I see in it. He is like the most desperate for validation person on the fucking planet. Yeah, it seems very insecure

Yeah Yeah, he's awful Ruin Twitter Rewind everything I mean If he was There's a lot of Good things his money could go towards

And he bought Twitter Yeah for a ridiculous amount of money It's just like George Lucas sold Star Wars for like 4 billion he bought Twitter for like fucking like 48 billion dollars Or something Like, it's fucking ridiculous.

So fucking unnecessary. It's sad. Brie Tarson says, How do you make the worst apology video imaginable? Oh, yeah. I'd break out the ukulele. Yeah. It can't really get much worse than, like, the real ones that exist, you know?

Like, that ukulele one is just insane. That was this really creative one. I haven't even heard of that woman. until that apology video. Oh, you didn't know who Miranda sings was? I don't remember her in the Reket Ralph 2? No, never heard of her in her life. She's in Reket Ralph 2.

She has like a whole cameo. Yeah, which I've never seen. Oh, really good, yeah. Oh, that aged, well, that age, like milk. She's, she's in the fucking, like, driving with fucking Jerry Seinfeld. Oh, comedies and cars getting coffee, yeah. Oh, God.

And she's so fucking annoying, like, on one of my accounts, I think when I heard the news of her Netflix show getting canceled, and this was like a decade ago, I was like, fucking finally. Like, that was my response. Like, she's so annoying. And it was like, obviously like,

okay, I guess just children love this or something. I'm like, okay. Yeah. And then now it's like, okay, I guess it really was child focused. And that's what she was doing things very inappropriately with children. Okay Yeah Yeah

Yeah she's grooming Kids or whatever I looked up on Netflix The other day though It's still there to watch that show I mean if cuties is still on the platform Who gives a shit Whatever

They're never gonna remove anything from their platform No Disney Plus they remove stuff all the time Yeah I would rather have things Be media preservation Than disappear Yeah I don't really care if it's still on there People want to watch it whatever

I just thought like her Her apology video I haven't seen it, but I saw some guy like put it on guitar hero or the modern day like equivalent of guitar hero. So he was like playing along with it. That's like what I watched. That's like really funny.

It even has the lyrics on top. Like, not a groomer, just a loser, whatever. It's the most tone deaf thing you could create. Because she... It's almost hilarious if it wasn't like for the subject. You could almost understand her being so bullion.

shitty in her response if it were something where she just turned on a live stream and just started talking and it's like okay well you know you might not realize that you're saying this but like how are you taking accountability when you're saying like oh it also didn't happen but i'm taking accountability accountability for what like all this weird shit about it but she wrote an entire song and scripted and rehearsed it down to the fucking sad puppy dog eyes in the camera like yeah in between parts and that's like she she rhythmically planned it out and still released it. Yeah.

And still... Yeah, that definitely wasn't a first take. Mm-hmm. No, absolutely not. Yeah, like, and didn't understand that, like, you creating it in this way is going to get way more attention on it.

And if people are just showing up to your apology video, they're going to discover all the shit you've been doing. Like, you're canceling yourself further. Like, you might have been able to salvage something if you hadn't made that video. You might have been able to, like, just ignore it. you know, maybe get another Disney cameo or something, but after that video, it's like,

now it's a huge meme, it's a huge news story, like major news is like covering it, like, everybody's talking about it. Yeah. Like, what the fuck is, what were you thinking? She's got kids herself too. That was totally psychopathic. Yeah. It's totally insane.

She seriously thought that like her whole manipulative puppy dog eyes shit would work so well that people would like just feel sorry for her. And if she's like, oh, I made a song and I'm sad about it now. Like, okay, now like, now it's obvious that you're a manipulator because that's what you're doing right now to us. Yeah, to everybody. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, apology videos are such a joke now. There was one in the late Spiderverse, wasn't there? Like, Miles has to apologize for his, doing a sponsorship. Yeah. He did a sponsorship for, like, baby powder or something. Yeah, that was funny. Yeah, that was funny. Yeah, that was pretty fun.

Yeah, totally psychopathic behavior. Fucking insane. I'm wondering how I could make a worse one. Because that was the question, right? How do you make a worse apology? Like, she's really raised the bar. Yeah, I think it's impossible. Because there was that, there was the, was it, Jake?

Was it Logan Paul with the Suicide Forest? One of the pools. It was like, it was like, the example is so extreme. It's like, what can you even? You can't, you'd have to, like, be really creative. Is the person, yeah, someone did like an interpretive dance. to one of them. Yeah. It's unbelievable.

Colleen Ballinger, Miranda sings. Like, you've decided to make a ukulele song out of it. You turned your whole thing into like a weird joke and still tried to make it serious somehow. You apologized without actually apologizing for anything. So it's not even an apology video because you're just doubling down and saying like, actually, this is a toxic gossip train and you're being mean to me. Yeah. And it's like, well, you're not apologizing.

Well, if you want to apologize for something, you just, you just apologize. You say, I'm sorry, I did that, I shouldn't have done that. So what's the point of the video? Yeah. I'm sorry. Yeah, like, that's all you need to say. Like, I shouldn't have done that, no excuse. I'm sorry.

But, you know, it's like, but she thinks it's okay, clearly. Yeah, like, that's all you need, really. Yes, I make a fire joke out of this. That's the whole process. Yeah, when I was, when I was talking to kids about my sex life and doing weird shit with them, like I was just trying to be like a cute little aunt. It's like, okay, it's still bad. I don't care.

Like what you, like, there should be a moment in your life where you reflect. And even if you had different intentions going into it and they weren't like malicious or whatever, you still did something that affected kids and have them, you know, retrospectively uncomfortable as they're growing up. Right? You still created that situation where they feel bad about it. You should, you should avoid those situations. and if you want to learn from it, you should reflect on it in some way

and not just be like, yeah, well, I didn't do anything wrong. Like, fuck off. Try to reflect on it. Just try. She's like incapable of it. So, yeah, this is one of those things where it's like, I didn't like her to begin with.

Turns out I'm a great judge of character because a lot of people I don't like just wind up getting canceled. Ezra Miller. You know, like, turns out I can fucking tell. It gives me a fucking vibe. That was unbelievable. the way she did it with the ukulele that was just like absolutely crazy you can't make it up

like I'm gonna just go ahead and say it's impossible for us to answer this question because we can't outdo what's already been done no one's that's that gonna be an absolute psychopath to like come up with that yeah even like yeah like yeah like there's no other I'm trying to think of scenarios like what you make a porn put it on porn habit's apology like even that wouldn't have wouldn't be as bad because it would be like so ridiculous that it's like yeah this it's like is obviously not even serious whereas this is like trying to do something like be persuasive through emotion you know like there's something really funny about that oh yeah for sure unbelievable insane space yeah it is

unbelievable all right you got one more okay let's um end on this one one for from Gavinum to the three of you. What is your favorite episode of the podcast so far? And thank you so and thank you such. Oh man, why do they write it this way? Thank you so much for great entertainment and perspectives. Ralph, best wishes for your future. Movies, hope Alex and Adam discuss them in the future.

Thanks. Yeah. Thank you. Rediter. What was the username? It was. Brie Darsen? Oh no, that was the last one. That was a funny use.

That was the previous one. Gavinum. Well, thank you. Yeah. Yeah, I wanted us to have a normal episode before I'm like, yeah, this is the last one for now. I'll be back on. Yeah.

So what's my favorite one? Yeah, some good memories you go. Oh, man. I love the trilogies. The Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit ones are really good. I'm really proud of those. The Hobbit one especially was really good. And yeah, I like the heat one.

I felt like I expressed myself pretty well on that. Like, that's a good movie. I like express myself pretty well. Because like the good movies are hard to talk about, but I felt like I had a lot to say about that. Yeah, I like a lot of the recent ones. I feel like we've gotten better or I've gotten better. So that's like, that's a good thing, like that you're improving or whatever.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I like a lot of the recent ones. The Valerian one was very funny. Yeah. Yeah, that was a great. Yeah, that was great. I mean, we got a lot of mileage out of that one. Yeah, that was really funny that one.

Yeah. What about you guys? Yeah, I'm with you on the trilogy ones. I'm big fan of those. Yeah. Great idea. I just think, honestly, we've covered, like, such a breadth. But I've got to go back to that Southland Tales episode.

I regularly revisit that discussion. Oh, yeah? That's a good idea. That movie's fucking awful. I think I was a little too lenient on that. That's what I mean. I've gotten better. Like,

seeing through the shit. Yeah, like that movie sucks. That's terrible. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that one's...

Yeah. Yeah. Trilogy ones. I agree with that. Fucking Madagascar episode is a classic. Yeah. Yeah. The fucking Jenny Nicholson one was really good, too.

That was a fun one. Yeah, that was a good episode. Yeah. Yeah. She's, yeah. my favorite guest probably and um was a carston was a good guest carston was great yeah the guest ones are good when we have like a good like a really good guest like like matt johnson and he was he was great he was very funny matt johnson i felt he's he's he's a particular character i felt great

when he laughed at my jokes yeah it felt great it felt great to make like him laugh like because He's a very funny guy. So, it's like, oh, that's good. I made him laugh. Yeah. Did I think you see Blackberry, by the way? Not yet. I'll see it.

No. Yeah, I've been meaning to. It looks amazing. It looks great. I can't wait to see it. Yeah. I just haven't had time. You know, I've been too busy watching Indiana Jones and other three hour long movies.

I need to like take a break. Yeah. The most important films you could watch. They're organized by priority. Yeah. Every movie's fucking three hours. Yeah. There's a

So, so yeah, Alex and I are going to continue doing the podcast. We've had a couple episodes with Ralph already. I know a lot of people are asking like, oh,

are you going to have a third member? We're not thinking about that right now. We're getting like really close to like film festival season and like just fucking busy as shit right now. So like we're, we're going to just, you know, coast for the time being.

Maybe we'll have guests on more frequently. and we'll see how it goes. Yeah, you guys can do it on your own. I mean, I trust you too to like, you know, do the show. Mm-hmm. Carry the tool. That's partly why like, you know, I'm leaving,

but I'm like, you know, I trust these two. Like, they got good sense of like what the show is. Mm-hmm. And like, they're very smart with their decisions. Yeah. So I'm not like too, aw. I'm not like too worried about the show, you know.

I think you guys will be fine. And yeah, like, uh, what, like, you know, I've, I've made movies before. I'd like to get more back into that because I've seen like my peers like excel so much in these past like five years I've been doing the show. And it's like, you know, I like, I would like to focus more on that. Not that the show is like a distraction at all. I mean, obviously I love doing it. But it's like, yeah, it's hard to like reconcile like shitting on movies for like two hours

at a time. I'm like and like you know we're like being critical of like movies that come out when like I'm a filmmaker myself and I need to like you know put my own stuff out there and yeah Chris Steckman recently had yeah some thoughts and similar thoughts like that yeah right and it's like you know I don't mind being critical on my own channel like I don't mind calling a spade a spade but like you know if a movie's bad like you know Valerian's a bad movie we don't we all pretty much all agree on that but like you know, when it's on my own channel, I can control the conversation a bit more rather than like in a podcast setting where it's like, oh yeah, let them, you know, I don't want to like

control the show or control anyone's thoughts here. So like, you know, let you guys do your thing and I'm going to do my movies and whatever and hopefully they work out well and yeah. But, you know, I'm pretty confident about it. I'm pretty excited for like the future and whatever. But yeah, you know, the show's amazing. It's great. I'm really proud of like our community. They're so, yeah, enthusiastic and passionate about movies. I'm like really proud of that, especially the Reddit and all that.

Yeah. This is super fantastic group of people we got watching the show. I'm proud of like the breadth we've made together. It has been like a crazy, long amount of time that we've sunk into this. And I do appreciate all the all the work, all the like what is it? and a half years more. Yeah, it's just a long. That's a last time.

It's five and a half years. So, yeah, I'm really proud of this whole thing. Sad to see you go, but it has to be done. Yeah, yeah. It's going to be a good thing. And yeah, I'll be back on. There's tons of more bad movies for us to cover. So that's what I told you guys earlier.

They announced an A24 horror Barney movie. Oh, yeah. If you want to come back on for that. Yeah. We want to plan for that one. It would feel weird covering that without you, right? Oh, yeah. Well, yeah, 100%.

That would be great. All right. That's a good one to aim for. So, the very latest, we'll have Ralph Beck on for that one. Yeah. Yeah, it's been great having you on. Yeah, I love the community we've built together. Yeah, of course.

It's been a pleasure. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you guys for letting me be a part of it. Of course. Yeah. Yeah. An awesome, awesome five years.

And yeah, we'll see where things go from here. But yeah, for the meantime, Alex and I are going to record, you know, the next few episodes. We'll see if we bring on some guests soon or not. Like, we don't know. We're not thinking about it right now next to the episode after this one's just going to be Alex and I. And then we'll figure, yeah, we'll figure the rest out. I've got bunch of shit I'm doing. So with that being said, I guess it's your turn, Alex, to recommend a movie?

Yeah. I've been saving this one for a little one. Well, waiting for the time to strike and I think it's now. Good fellas. I want to do the 1980. No, not a different 80s movie. The 1985 film, Tampopo. I've heard the name.

By Juzzo Itami. It's known as like a noodle western or something crazy. I haven't seen it myself. 1985. Okay. It's on my watch list. I've just heard very good things. Yeah.

any excuse to watch this now. Yeah, I'll watch it at some point. I'll put it on my list. I think it is on my list, my watch list. Yeah. So, even if I can't discuss it with you guys. Also, I have my own podcast too. If you guys like, if you want to listen to Ralph, yeah, let me just mention that.

If you want more Ralph in your life, you can just listen to that. You can find it on my main channel. And that is, is that just on the Ralph, the Movie Maker channel or do you have it like uploaded to like podcast stuff as well? Oh, it sounds like Spotify, yeah. If you look up like Ralph the movie maker, it should come up. Yeah. Sweet.

So yeah. Ralph Solo podcast. If you're missing Ralph. Yeah. So like you'll never hear me again. Yeah. Yeah. Daily dose.

Yeah, exactly. So yeah. Daily dose of Ralph. Cool, cool. Yeah. Right. DDR. All right, guys.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Very good. All right. It's been a pleasure. Have a fucking happy Sardonicast, everybody. Yeah, happy Sardonicast. Thanks for listening.

We got, I forgot all the other outro stuff. Oh yeah, sorry. We, $2 a month, sardoticast.com. You can listen to these episodes early as they're edited. Sign up for premium. It's only $2 a month. Also, Patreon.com slash Sardonicast. Also, we got merch link in the description.

Also, there's a Sardonicast highlights channel. You should subscribe to that on YouTube. on YouTube, subscribe to Sardonicast, hit the bell. Subscribe to Ralph the Movie Maker channel on YouTube, hit the fucking bell. Subscribe to his solo podcast, RSS feeds, or however you do that. I'm not a fucking boomer.

I don't know how this shit works. Subscribe to YMS and Adam plays, which is actually my channel name now. Yeah. Oh shit. I changed my name. I thought you were taking YMS gaming. Snatched it up. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, that's right.

You're snagging all of them. Yeah. Every possible combination. Yeah. All right. Have a happy Sardonicast. Peace out, everybody. Thanks for listening.

Bye bye. Bye, everyone. All right. Bye-bye.