Sardonicast - Sardonicast 190: The Human Centipede Trilogy

Episode Date: May 26, 2025

Support the Show for $2 a month and receive all future episodes early at https://sardonicast.com and https://www.patreon.com/Sardonicast. Website: https://sardonicast.com Patreon: https://www.patreo...n.com/Sardonicast Reddit: http://www.reddit.com/r/sardonicast Twitter: https://twitter.com/sardonicast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/sardonicast.bsky.social Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/sardonicast Sardonicast Highlights: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8AhJ0bzQgs5fb9m_ZCRqkw/featured Alex's channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/IHEOfficial Adam's channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/YourMovieSucksDOTorg Jake's channel: https://www.youtube.com/@ManCarryingThing Jake's movie channel: https://www.youtube.com/@womancarryingman Alex's Twitter: https://twitter.com/IHE_OFFICIAL Adam's Twitter: https://twitter.com/2gay2lift Adam's bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/yms.bsky.social Jake's twitter: https://x.com/ManCarrying Jake's bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/mancarryingthing.bsky.social Adam's Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/YMS Jake's Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mancarryingthing Intro music by: https://www.youtube.com/user/anUnkindnessvideo Fan art for this episode that likely would have demonetized the video if shown: https://www.reddit.com/r/Sardonicast/comments/1kluv9x/the_sard_centipede/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button Timestamps: 0:00 Intro, Normies discussion 16:17 The Human Centipede (First Sequence) 40:26 The Human Centipede 2 (Full Sequence) 1:01:41 The Human Centipede III (Final Sequence) 1:24:14 Questions 1:53:21 Recommendation + outro

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:04 Three, two, one. Uh-oh. Stinky. Poop. Ha-ha-ha-ha. Funny poop. Stinky. That was a quote from...
Starting point is 00:00:20 Mission Impossible? A film less than a minute long on YouTube called, uh-oh. With the description, Stinky Dinky. A classic. posted March 15th, 2016. One of my favorite films. I'm Adam from your movie sucks.
Starting point is 00:00:40 This is Sardona cast. Hello. I'm Alexi. I'm going to say, have you shit yourself again, you swine? That's my quote for the day. Nice. Okay.
Starting point is 00:00:50 And I'm Jake, man carrying thing. And you're going to be the middle piece. Nice. My favorite. It's a stinky episode today. It's a stinky episode. Don't get much stinkier than this. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:08 And so we're going to start out. We're going to talk about you guys made some stinky comments about me in the last episode while I was going pee. Oh, yeah. Wait, what? I don't remember this. Yeah, well, you didn't remember. You go that baby tired. Yeah, I went pee.
Starting point is 00:01:24 And then you called me stinky. Oh, okay. And then Alex said I was drinking too many lacroys. Well, actually, I drink. bubbly now, okay? Oh, wow. What's bubbly? I like the taste better. You got a new one? Bubly is...
Starting point is 00:01:37 Intellectual. Yeah, I don't know if it's necessarily newer, but I just, I feel like they got better stronger flavors. I like bubbly more than La Croy. Better flavors. So I'm glad I never accepted the $10 million dollar LaCroix sponsorship
Starting point is 00:01:54 because then I'd have to lie about it. Damn. Brutal honesty. Some other stinky comments. in the subreddit. How do you guys feel? There's some weird stuff going on as per usual.
Starting point is 00:02:12 I kind of wanted to hear what you guys thought. As per usual, I mean, you're getting like all the heat. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. It feels like it's a little bit of a lose-lose situation. Where like it's, I'm always like criticized for being too similar to you. But then like we have like a different conclusion and just, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:02:32 I don't know what people are talking about half the time. But it's more about you. How do you feel about it? Yeah. Look, I would just, first of all, I would like to apologize to the Normie community. Thank you. I didn't realize. Yeah, that's the big one.
Starting point is 00:02:47 I didn't realize that that was a sensitive, derogatory word. Yeah. And I promise to pledge at least $10 to the upcoming Normie Pride parade that I will be hosting. We're going to start the parade at Applebee's, and it's going to end all the way at, I don't know, what's that bad? You can't even think of another normy thing.
Starting point is 00:03:16 No, no, I could think of it. I could think of it. You can't even think of two normy things. Okay. That's how normal you are, dude. Well, yeah, I mean, that's my weakness. Olive Garden. We're going to end it at Olive Garden.
Starting point is 00:03:29 This is so offensive. Yeah, I've, It's a horrific thing I said. I'm so sorry. Yeah. You know what's funny? When you said it, when you said it, I was like, I know exactly what the comments are going to be. Like, I knew you were just doing a joke, but I was just like, yep, there it is.
Starting point is 00:03:49 That's the moment. It's a joke and it's funny, but it's also the most perfect way to describe that movie. It is a normie masterpiece. And I would just like to point out, I would just like to point out, it's not necessarily like, oh, Normie is bad. Because throughout the entire episode, I'm saying it's good a film that isn't a sequel,
Starting point is 00:04:12 you know, that's, I guess not indie, but, you know, just like, this film is doing well and I'm glad people are enjoying it. I was saying that I wish I could enjoy it as much as other people. I don't think that I'm better
Starting point is 00:04:24 for enjoying it still, but not considering it to be a masterpiece. But it seems as though I don't know. A lot of people only think in binary, maybe. So, like, the most extreme interpretations of what I said could only be the truth to them. I don't understand. I mean, I saw a lot of comments that were saying they agreed with a lot of your critiques,
Starting point is 00:04:49 but they were just annoyed with the way you said it. Just the word normie. Yeah, I think so. Like, how would you define normie? Normie? Normal. Yeah, it's a normie. It's literally. Okay, you know what? I actually prepared. I looked it up.
Starting point is 00:05:04 I searched Normie definition before, because I woke up a little early, so I had a little bit of time to be weird. To research normalcy. How to be normal? Yeah, so normie, it's, believe it or not, believe it or not, Merriam Webster has Normie. Okay. Normal. Now, plural, normies. sometimes disparaging, but the definition says, a normal average or ordinary person, colon,
Starting point is 00:05:37 a person with mainstream attitudes, interests, et cetera. That's it. And believe it or not, first known use is in the 1950s, which I didn't have enough time to look up that example, but that's what Merriam-Webster says. And then it has a bunch of quotes from published critics and artists using the word and sometimes derogatory, sometimes not.
Starting point is 00:06:01 Sorry, sometimes disparaging, sometimes not. I don't know. I feel like as a person that spent most of my life dealing with the, you know, the self-image issues and feeling misunderstood and hating myself for not being normal and trying to be, I feel like just saying the term normie is not that bad. Like I'm not saying Normie is bad Like that's a you know It's just normal
Starting point is 00:06:29 That's all it means I guess online It's often used as like a pejorative I'm trying to think like where I When I first started seeing that word And when I first especially started seeing it online Yeah Like a 4chan thing
Starting point is 00:06:42 It's a 4chan thing It's it is a 4chan thing Is when it started getting popular It was like people would pay A big man Tyrone To say like normies get out ree Right That's right
Starting point is 00:06:54 But here's the thing Even within that, the context is already, by you saying the word normie, you're doing something that is self-deprecating. You're doing something that is self-disperaging. When you say normies get out of my board, you're saying, I am a weirdo that wants to be in my space of other weirdos, right? So I don't understand how someone else can take offense to the word normie, even if it is used in a disparaging way, because it inherently, by somebody used.
Starting point is 00:07:26 using the term, it is also self-deprecating. Right? I'm admitting I'm a fucking weirdo, right? Yeah, but I think it's changed over time in that. Everyone wants to be unique. Like the whole point, like our whole era is about being unique in individuals. And when you're saying, well, this is for normies. I really think that people don't want to be normies.
Starting point is 00:07:48 I think that's a... Yeah, I think you're right. Yeah, that's weird to me. Because, like, that's the... that's such a fucking normie thing to say. Because like think about it. Like if you've lived a life where like your main struggle has been not fitting in, you don't exactly wish to be like,
Starting point is 00:08:07 I'm a person that wishes that I was normal. You know, I've spent my entire life wanting to be normal. Like so it's fucking weird that that normal people are like offended by being, I don't know, referred to as normal, like functioning, healthy, not mentally ill.
Starting point is 00:08:25 Like, I don't understand. You know? Like, is it just romanticized to be weird now, I guess? Like, I have to admit it to myself because I'm just honest. And, like, it's, of course I'm a fucking weirdo. Like, do I have to list every weird thing that I do? Like, it would just be dishonest if I didn't categorize myself that way. It's partially that.
Starting point is 00:08:47 And it's also, I guess, in the realm when we're talking about film discussion, a lot of the time when it's boiled down to, oh, Adam had a good opinion here or Jake had a bad opinion here or vice versa. It's often just like, your opinion is my opinion. And that's kind of what people are saying. And if there are more people who have a different opinion than you, then I guess you have the bad opinion then? It has to be binary. I think it stems from like people wanting their opinions to be backed up and gratified and parroted.
Starting point is 00:09:19 right and it's not enough for 90% of the population to think something's a masterpiece everybody has to and then you know if I use a word like normie then that becomes the scapegoat for yeah that's what that's what it feels like and obviously not every person you know obviously there's hundreds of i have a question or however many people yes please okay i have a question for you do you and try to be as honest as you can i know this always have been okay do you feel like when something gains mass popularity, like massively popular. Does that in some part of your brain make you want to like it a little less? No, no. I was actually noticing that that was happening with something like everything everywhere all at once, right? So there will be something and as a person
Starting point is 00:10:08 that, you know, a lot of these films I check out at a film festival and right away before it's even publicly available and accessible enough to be mainstream, a lot of the films that I love, well, not a lot, but some of them wind up becoming these huge successes. And then because they're so huge and because everybody loves them and because everybody is talking about them and trying to push them out, then there becomes a bit of a backlash. You know, I've seen it happen with everything everywhere all at once. To some extent, hundreds of beavers because, you know, even though it's not known outside of like filmhead circles, there's definitely, you'd see on Twitter like,
Starting point is 00:10:43 people were calling this a masterpiece, like, I don't get it, like, or whatever, right? It doesn't really matter to me. I want things to be successful that I love, right? If more people enjoy the things that I like, that means more things that I like will get made. That's a great fucking thing. So, no, I don't feel like that is the case. I just, I understand the, what's the word? the, not want, but the almost like predisposition, the, almost kind of like it, it's kind of an illusion.
Starting point is 00:11:21 I get why people would gravitate towards the idea that if there's someone like me that typically has tastes that don't necessarily align all the time with what most people enjoy or what most people dislike. I understand why someone would be tempted to feel as though my tastes are some kind of reaction to other people's tastes that I see this thing is popular, therefore I don't like it, or this thing is unpopular, therefore I do like it. I understand why people would think that way, but that's not the case. And most of these things I've seen before there was a consensus on it. And I've kept the same opinion, right? So... Here's a question for you. Would you call everything, everything,
Starting point is 00:12:08 all at once, a normie masterpiece as well? Not quite. Not quite. No. Okay. Because that film, I feel, does a nutley, you know, like butt plug fight scene. That's quite always. It's celebrated for its weirdness, but it also still works in a way that's accessible
Starting point is 00:12:32 to everybody. So I don't know. But what is weird? Hmm? What is weird? I mean, to me, the butt plug thing was just Reddit humor, right? At least to me, I didn't like it. Really?
Starting point is 00:12:46 Yeah. It was trying to do a lot of things at once. Oh, yeah, I hear it. But I wouldn't, if somebody were to call everything everywhere all at once a normie masterpiece, I wouldn't feel insecure about liking it. And I wouldn't get upset at someone for saying that. I would just disagree with it if I disagreed with it. I would say, oh, I don't think it's a normie masterpiece.
Starting point is 00:13:08 because X, Y, Z, right? There's no, that's the difference is, you know, Alex, you've called things on the podcast like furry bait before. That doesn't upset me, right? If I, if, if, if someone who, uh, listens to hip hop music and loves hip hop music called Vanessa Carlton's A Thousand Miles, a White Girl masterpiece, that wouldn't make me feel upset. I would be like, hell yeah, I'm going to rock.
Starting point is 00:13:38 to this white girl anthem right it's it's it's there's nothing wrong with categorizing things in ways that you're like oh this appeals to this demographic and whether or not you like it nor me or the masses or general audiences or however what we want to call it that is a demographic right so it's not a bad thing it's a it's a it's a way to categorize things you know I don't know it's just and I guess yeah we're on a platform where anyone can engage at any level and you don't even know how many of them have the context of you and your taste because like, I don't know, I know your taste. I know you're still like, you still like the Lord
Starting point is 00:14:18 of the Rings movies and like Sam Ramey's Spider-Man doesn't really get more normie than that. We recently did Unforgiven, which is like a big popular Western that like you really like to. So it's like maybe if you were contrarian for the sake of contrarian and that was a pattern as far as that stuff. But I don't know, I feel like you're more consistent than some of these people give credit. Yeah, exactly. I don't know. I thought it was funny. There are other critics and filmmakers who have DMed me agreeing with me and also thinking it was funny. So, you know what?
Starting point is 00:14:49 I'm going to continue to exist in this way. I'm going to continue. Don't take it back. No. I'm going to continue to provide catharsis for people that don't necessarily always align with the most popular opinion and most popular experience of media. And that catharsis is very fucking important to those people. So I'm going to continue being that guy. And maybe if you've never experienced that, you might not know how important that is.
Starting point is 00:15:20 So I'm going to continue being honest. And if you don't know what that feels like, then you're having a good life. And if Normie is the worst thing you've ever been called, you're doing pretty good. True. True that. Go for it. Yeah. All right.
Starting point is 00:15:33 Never change. Never change. Except when I, when I, when I, disagree with you on a film then change. But otherwise, all the other times, it's fine. Yeah. Also, yeah, thanks, um, thanks Jake for, uh, providing good feedback and good pushback and having substantive, uh, disagreements because the normie crowd really needed some represented representation on the podcast. Like, I'm just, I'm really happy that they're feeling finally heard, you know? I'm so, so happy to be representing the Normies and the Normie Americans, you know.
Starting point is 00:16:09 I'm a voice for the unheard Americans in this world. Yes. I am loud and proud. All right. So we're going to start talking about what could never be described as a Normie masterpiece, right? By anyone's definition. The Human Centipede, a film by Tom Six.
Starting point is 00:16:33 More like Tom sucks, right? Oh, ouch. Nice. Got him. Got him. Yeah, he, this is, okay. So when this film had a trailer released, it became a bit of a meme. Was it like 2008 or 2009?
Starting point is 00:16:55 2009, yeah? Yeah. So I remember the entire draw to this movie was just, oh, this concept exists, right? It's a concept. film. And this was around the time this was like just in this few year period where like memes
Starting point is 00:17:14 were starting to take hold of actual things outside of the internet. So Snakes on a plane was a movie that in a similar vein became a huge success because people shared the trailer and we're like, what? It's about snakes on a plane and they even wound up reshooting to have more Sam Jackson
Starting point is 00:17:30 yelling about snakes on the plane because they were like, oh people like this. People like that it's snakes on a plane. conceptually gimmicky stuff exactly exactly and now that type of success is almost seen as like commonplace like people are trying
Starting point is 00:17:45 too hard to capture those sort of things right post shark nato yeah even slender man yeah that's almost a little the IP things I would categorize a little differently actually
Starting point is 00:18:00 because IP that still fits within the same like just brain And popular thing equals success, whatever, right? Anyway, this movie became successful because of its concept. And I don't know if someone would make this if it wasn't their fetish. You know? I don't know who would make this if it wasn't like they're getting sexually excited. Because if you wanted to make something that's just grotesque for the sake of being grotesque,
Starting point is 00:18:34 I feel like there's other things you could do, right? This one seems like particularly weirdly fetishy. Yeah. What did you guys think? Did you like it? Yeah, I kind of feel similarly about like, the real story here is Tom Six, a Dutch fellow. I don't know if we've spoken about any, like, Dutch films. So it's the first Dutch film we're speaking about on the podcast.
Starting point is 00:18:57 Great, great representation of Dutch films. Yeah. We've never spoken about any Serbian films. True, yeah. That's kind of the same bucket as this trilogy. I had seen this whole trilogy before, each of them only once, I think. Maybe I've seen the second one twice. But the first time I saw this was before I knew, before I had any money, so I couldn't like buy it and I didn't really want to buy it and I didn't know how to sell the seven Cs or any of that yet. So I watched it on one of those like one, two, three movie type websites where it's like dog ass quality and I don't know. I still found it quite memorable, I guess. It is still like, yes, this concept is everything about it. Everyone is joking about the concept. And yeah, I don't know. I don't know if the, I can't decide if it is like a fetishy thing or he's like a troll that like enjoys upsetting people.
Starting point is 00:19:50 It might be a mix of both, to be honest. He might like both aspects of it. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if any of them I would call good movies. but I find lots funny about parts of them here and there, especially Dieter Laser, the German dude, who just gets crazier and crazier,
Starting point is 00:20:11 the more like I've read about him and learned about him and read interviews from, he's quite a character, and I feel like he's the most entertaining and best part of this movie for me, but it's also stupid. Like, they're all so dumb and, like, impossible to take seriously for me, that they don't really work for me as far as, like, genuine horror film. Like,
Starting point is 00:20:31 I'm not, like, scared. And they're so sort of, like, crude and dumb that they're better comedies for me, honestly. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:41 Where are you with this? Had you seen any of these before, Jake? I had not seen any of them. No. This was my first time. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
Starting point is 00:20:51 But you did choose it. No, I'm just reminding you. No, this is on, do not put this blame on me. Fuck you. This is nice.
Starting point is 00:20:59 on you, okay? All right. All right, guys. Yeah, you know what? Fuck it. It was fine. It wasn't that bad. Like the first, all right, we're talking just about the first one, right? We're talking about the first one. The first one, I was a little surprised that it was, it was an actual movie. It was like, all right, this is a movie. Like, it's a bad movie. The acting, and especially the beginning with the two women, the two Americans, very funny, enjoyable. The first moment that queued me off to be like, oh, this is a comedy, was the doctor sitting in his car looking at a picture of like two dogs poorly photoshopped. There's three dogs. The three dogs, yes.
Starting point is 00:21:48 And he's just like petting the picture. And I'm like, oh, okay. I lost it at that. I love that. But I think what I wasn't prepared for was the kind of really unpleasant, just like suffering of just like lingering on these people just screaming and agony. Like, I just feel bad for the actors having to just like act this out. Like, okay, in this scene, imagine you're eating a shit from someone's butt. And yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:21 Yeah, like, how do you play that scene? Exactly. There's no actor's studio. There's no method of schooling to get you to that place. So I don't, in a way, is kind of impressive. But, yeah, ultimately, like a lot of it, I kind of thought was a little boring. Yep. It's weirdly slow for a movie that's trying to be shocking.
Starting point is 00:22:47 Yeah. Yeah, it's kind of boring. Lots of, like, long, just like lingering shots. shots of like repetitive stuff, going back and forth. It just takes a long time to build up to things. And a lot of the movie is trying to be like classic suspense stuff besides the shock and gore, which is like, whatever you think of it, it's effective. I think it's pretty effective. But besides that, most of the movie is like, okay, you're, you know, creepy like suspense thriller type of thing with the dumbest characters, the dumbest situation. My absolute favorite, I laughed
Starting point is 00:23:23 out loud the hardest, maybe the only time in the movie, was when she's dragging her incapacitated friend off of the medical table or whatever, and they're approaching the stairs. And she can barely pull this woman. They're approaching the stairs. And I'm like, how is she going to get her up the stairs? And then it just hard cut to she's upstairs already. I had the same reaction. That was a weird conflict for me, because they had already, like, been outside. So I would have assumed that the lower level led out to like a backyard sort of thing anyway because like the space didn't make sense no because they were already outside doing the barking like eat from the dog bowl thing so it's like okay well you had to have either gone up the stairs already or there was a you were on ground level
Starting point is 00:24:15 in the basement Adam you're thinking about this more than anyone ever thought about this who made this film. I just figured they like crawled up and down as a centipede type thing. I don't know. I didn't actually find this as boring as I was anticipating to. There's another one I find way more boring, actually. As long as Dieter lasers on screen, I'm there. I'm like obsessive of this dude. He's apparently like a method actor. He's method on here. He didn't interact with anyone else, like on the project outside of his scenes. just a wacky dude. And I'm kind of with you, Jake Quiroz.
Starting point is 00:24:57 His IMDB photo is great. Yeah, he looks so young. There's so many good, like, he's a freaky, like, looking dude. He's, like, really well cast, and, like, I was losing it looking at his Wikipedia because, like, his dad was, like, a real, like, literal Nazi. Oh, wow. Just all of the shit, like, just craziness. Like, I'd recommend reading his wiki.
Starting point is 00:25:17 Because it's like, what? I'm serious? This is, like, unhinged, all of this. But yeah, and with Jake as far as like, oh, this is more of a movie than I remember in that like 240P. I guess I watched it in that first time. Like it was like a rain machine and stuff. And yeah, kind of looks like a movie. And there's like, oh, there's a swimming pool set and all of this.
Starting point is 00:25:38 There was some money but into this. And I'm kind of curious like how that happened. I'm curious that with all three of these, how they got funding and how they found actors and how they even got this made, to be honest. Yeah. Because yeah, the shock value kind of sells itself, but it's also making it and like finding these people to do this and kind of accumulate themselves and like get naked. Like it's, they're all like naked, basically. Lots of nudity, lots of like racism and just the worst stuff you can think of and like the edgiest way possible. And it's kind of curious from that angle. But yeah, as you said, it's also just so stupid with this emphasis on like the market. beat around this movie and this franchise being 100% medically accurate they tell again and again and again, which is bollocks. Like, what are you talking about? What do they actually mean by that? Here's what the Wikipedia says.
Starting point is 00:26:36 When approaching investors to fund the project, Six did not mention the premise of the film for fear of putting off potential backers. Financieres did not discover the full nature of the film until completion. That's awesome. That's funny. Wow. Sure. I mean, it feels like a real movie because it has like some production value. I feel like the quality or the standard for like low budget horror has declined rapidly since 2008 or whatever.
Starting point is 00:27:07 I mean, they're shooting out in the forest and they have these massive floodlights and it looks like, you know, it's like how you used to to film things before you just would let the screen be pitch dark or do day for night. really badly with the digital cameras or whatever. You know, like, there's some decent, decent stuff. It's a competency short. Yeah, it definitely is. I'm so weirded out by that because I, maybe because I've seen it a few times or I don't know. I feel like the cinematography in this one was like not great.
Starting point is 00:27:42 I feel like the lighting did feel cheap at points and the framing wasn't great. Like maybe in the context of it being like a director that no one's ever heard of making this random thing that just happened to get its, get its legs, um, through, uh, you know, online reaction. Maybe in that context, like, sure, like, it's technically a movie. It looks, all right. I get it like, not the most incompetent ever, but I do feel like, uh, the cinematography did get better in the second one.
Starting point is 00:28:18 For me, anyway, I just, I feel like it was more. realized, more well realized. There was, there was at least one, like, kind of noticeable day for night, annoying shot when, uh, they're in the back when she's like trying to escape. I don't know. I didn't, I didn't, I mean,
Starting point is 00:28:37 great visually. I'm not saying Phil Moss-Zigma shot it or anything. I mean, I, I just think it's, it's better than, um, I expected it to be. Yeah, what you would expect, yeah. Yeah, it's better than I remember, um, especially with like, I don't know, With that concept, you pictured like a shark exorcist here, like, oh, this is like shot for like $15 literally. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:58 So I guess that was like that, yeah, the bar was so low, Marianna Trench, like low. But I was going to, oh, okay, there's something, I guess, going on here. So with, with it becoming like kind of a meme or whatever back in the day before its release, the concept alone did not intrigue me. I'm not usually one to be like, oh, shock value, wow, that will be so interesting. You know, because oftentimes it doesn't even live up to its own shock. What made me want to check out the movie was at about 30 seconds through the trailer when you have the two quote unquote actors in the car as the tire gets flat. And she says, what was that?
Starting point is 00:29:51 And I was like, okay, I have to see this. But if this is what the acting is like, I have to see the movie. And that's honestly the best section of the movie for me is the first 30 minutes where it's just those two talking with each other in just like the worst acting possible. Like I wrote down another quote. There's no signal. There's always a signal. Like, just terrible dialogue, terrible delivery. And that's just fun for me.
Starting point is 00:30:22 I love cringe. I love that genre. And then for the rest of the film, they don't talk because they're not the front piece. Which is good. It works so much better with the other guy who's speaking Japanese the whole time. So I feel like my brain can't really discern as well if he's a, you know, I thought he was pretty good actor. But I mean, yeah, he was. Spoke the language, I'd be able to tell.
Starting point is 00:30:46 Yeah, to my not knowing Japanese brain, he was the better actor for sure, but it was less entertaining for me. Because I feel as though it doesn't even live up to the shock of its premise, unfortunately. It never feels like they're connected surgically. It just feels like, oh, they're actors with like some fabric over their head that they're just, oh, their faces are. close to the other persons, but like, you'd have to, you'd have to use your imagination really, really, really hard to be convinced of anything that they're saying is happening. And it just did not work for me. So, unfortunately.
Starting point is 00:31:31 Yeah, they basically all have that exact same issue. Because, yeah, once the centipede is formed, it is just a German dude and a Japanese man, like, doing all of the vocal lifting in the movie. Yeah. Um, there really, there isn't really any goal once the centipede is like together. Um, playtime. I guess it's, I guess it's, yeah, it's playing around. Feeder. Yeah. But there isn't really any like tension or, uh, yeah, anything that gives it any um, past that first act. And I agree that's, that is definitely the best bit. I find three dog, the funniest part in that weird grave. Um, yeah. I found the human centipede wiki, um, three dogs got its own entry. And that's another thing. I'd recommend looking at if you were intrigued by the shit. It's hilarious on there. The comment section is just wild.
Starting point is 00:32:19 It's just crazy. The people that like this movie are pretty passionate about it. Like the fandom wiki? Oh my God. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's crazy. Uh-huh. I got some good comments I'll bring up later for episode three.
Starting point is 00:32:36 But yeah, it is just kind of like dull after a certain point. It's like, well, I guess. Yeah, obviously the concept is so dumb. Yeah, you say it's 100% medically accurate, but I mean, as the character at the back does, like, dies of sepsis, you can't eat shit. Like, you're going to die. It's a waste product. Like, you can't live off shit. Like, it's just inherently stupid. So, like, where are you actually supposed to take that? And I guess they try. And they, like, try to shock you, like, oh, she tries to escape. So we're going to make sure she goes in the middle as punishment. It's like just trying to escalate how gross out it can be. And then this whole kind of cop angle where these cops keep coming over and there's this whole like Dita trying to get them to drink like the water. Drink your water then leave because he wants to replace him. The most suspicious human being to ever exist. I should drink this open liquid from him right now.
Starting point is 00:33:35 Yeah, everyone was such a dumb ass. Like, yeah, you're right. He's so ridiculously suspicious. And they just don't really treat him as such. And he's like going downstairs to check on the center bead and whatever while they're still up there. And it's like, well, I can't even buy into this premise because I'm like not even taking it seriously. Everyone is such a dumbass. Like, it's just so dumb.
Starting point is 00:33:55 In if we were to try and rank like most incompetent officers in film history, like this would be up there. Like they're the worst cops ever. Just the way he reacts to things is so. Like he sees his partner shot dead and he's just like, oh, oh, oh. Yeah. Like, he takes so long to react. That's where it started to become a little funny again. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:24 Yeah. Yeah, this is a movie that I'm more laughing at than laughing with, too. Yeah. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, I'm laughing at how absurd it is for most of it. Because you can't take it seriously. There's so many moments where it's like you could have just killed a doctor right now. Like the Japanese guy easily could have killed the dog easily done something.
Starting point is 00:34:44 Or even just the basic concept of like, you're attached by like a bit of skin flap that's kind of so long. Yeah, you just cut your lip. It would hurt, but you could just like tear it off. Yeah. You know. Well, even like the way the film ends, spoilers for human sense to be one. Oh no. It's supposed to be this like sickening.
Starting point is 00:35:02 Oh, the woman in the middle is trapped and she's going to die trapped. But like two cops have just been killed. Like people would. go and check in on that and find her and then I guess she'd be fine. So it's like not even that like scary of an ending. They were off the clock. I don't know. Yeah, it's like exactly.
Starting point is 00:35:19 It's like so dumb. There's only two cops that exist in Germany now. Yeah. Well, thank you IFC films for distributing this. Yeah, how did that happen? I don't know. Yeah. Because no one else will take it.
Starting point is 00:35:37 Why did he kill himself? That's my question. Yeah, I have the same question. That's a question that I ask myself in many third acts of films. You know, fucking I am legend. It's just, I don't know. People just, when you run out of ideas and you got to end your movie in some way. And I don't know.
Starting point is 00:36:06 It's just people, I don't know, he kills himself. Like he was so close to. succeeding. It's just like you fight this whole way. It was just like, all right. Then he gives like this whole backstory to justify it. Well, I think that I think the implication is that because he's Japanese, he wanted to die honorably. No, literally. I think that's literally why. Oh, God. Yeah. I didn't even think of that. Yeah. No, I think that that's the implication is just like, oh, I don't want to survive this way. I would, you know, he'd. That's crazy. I'm shamed. He didn't have a samurai sword, but...
Starting point is 00:36:43 That's really funny. Fuck it up. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Do you think this is like kind of jumping off a little bit, the sore and hostel kind of trends from the early 2000s where it's like, I remember seeing those posters for sore and that was, it wasn't quite on this level, but it was like, do you dare see Saw?
Starting point is 00:37:03 And it was kind of about like the gore and how excessive that was is just this kind of like, the logical extreme of like where. those kind of concepts go. Yeah, kind of. It's like all a concept. It's just a concept. And it becomes like, it's more of like a test that like teenagers buy so they can like invite each other out like, oh, let's watch the human sensip just to like gross each other
Starting point is 00:37:23 out and try and it's just one of those. So I wouldn't be surprised if it's sold decently well on DVD or whatever for that fact to learn because it's just so absurd. I mean, I've got a sequel. We've got two somehow. That's my question. Like, what is this guy doing now? Like, he, these must have made some money in it, you know, like, this was like a huge phenomenon.
Starting point is 00:37:44 Apparently he directed Big Brother, the, like, TV show for a bit, but he always wanted to make, like, horror movies. Like the original. So I don't know if he went, if you went back to TV or something like that. I don't know. Nobody knows. He's just gone. Well, I lowered my rating from a five to a three. What did you have?
Starting point is 00:38:04 I think I had it a five before. Right. I was a bit younger when I watched it I was like eh but yeah 3 out of 10 for me it's uh yeah it just unfortunate
Starting point is 00:38:13 it should at least live up to the shock of its premise and it just unfortunately doesn't for me yeah I'm pretty much there with you on the exact same rating one and a half star three out of 10 um I do think that doctor is like well cast and like chewing the scenery hard he's funny to me he is funny um and three dog as well is where it looks
Starting point is 00:38:35 that Photoshop is just ridiculous, like how lazy that shit is. So I'm laughing. I don't know, I didn't find it quite as boring as you guys. I was kind of actually surprised by when it ended up. I kind of flew by because it was just consistently funny because of how just dumb and stupid it is. I'm going to give it a two out of five. Wow.
Starting point is 00:39:01 Okay. You like that. Yeah. I loved it. I think, I think. I think. Maybe it was the expectations were like, oh, that wasn't that bad. But honestly, there were moments.
Starting point is 00:39:16 There were some scenes, like in the second half of the film, just watching these actors. Like, they seem, like, they are really good at expressing, like, horror and revulsion when they're in their, like, I don't know. There was something about it. I was just so bleak and depressing that was just kind of like, damn, you know, that would suck to have my mouth sewn to. somebody's butt. Yeah, that would really suck. And the actors sold it for me.
Starting point is 00:39:45 I mean, true. It's the new Salo. Yeah, yeah, that's, oh, I've never seen Sallow. He loves that film, apparently. Yeah, Tom Six, surprise a gross. Oh, of course he does. Yeah. If there's poo in there, he loves it.
Starting point is 00:39:58 He's got a poo thing for sure. Yeah. Have you guys recommended Sallow on here? Yeah, we did. We talked about it. Yeah, we did do it a while ago. Okay. We weren't huge, though.
Starting point is 00:40:09 I didn't love it, but it's still better than any of these. I'm just thinking about other poo masterpieces I could recommend some day. Master pooses. Oh, God. Master feces. So, yeah, good film. Good, yeah, we all loved it. Human Centipede 2.
Starting point is 00:40:30 Second sequence? Full sequence. That's what they call it. Full sequence, yeah. Did they add that like after the fact, or was that in the marketing originally? They each got the like sequence tag This first sequence, full sequence And final sequence
Starting point is 00:40:44 I don't know Did they like star was it And change all the titles Usually on IMDB it would say If it changed the title But it doesn't But I mean that doesn't necessarily mean that Maybe I'll have to check the wiki again
Starting point is 00:40:57 This was the dumbest Fucking piece of shit I hated this movie so much I fucking hate this film I hate this movie Oh my god This is great This is great
Starting point is 00:41:08 I fucking hate this one. I like this one. Yeah. Yeah, I like this one. No. Well, okay. It lives up to the shock and disgust of its premise. No.
Starting point is 00:41:24 If you were to try and make a movie with the goal of just making the most like depraved, disgusting, disturbing, like just nonsense. Like, it feels like that's what it was. going for and in that sense like it did a good job at what I was trying to do like I like this one the most out of it's not even funny anymore you know it doesn't have a laser in anymore it's still funny it's almost like it's so edgy like what it's trying to do yeah and I guess there is I guess the reason I'd seen this one more than one time was because this was one of the first movies I ever made a video on um on like an old old channel oh wow and it
Starting point is 00:42:08 wouldn't, I don't think I can, it was taken down by YouTube basically, because you basically can't show any frames of this film. I know. And there are different cuts of it. There's like a, there's an extended sort of extra edgy version when there were scenes that were playing, I guess that's the version I watched this time, like the director's cut, whatever it's called. Unreaded. There were scenes I didn't remember from when I made this video. So I guess there's some little soft spot from remembering how much it upset me that original time watching it. And that's just kind of how it feels it feels like just like an older brother trying to piss you off like just yeah and then the rules don't even matter like fuck you like it just feels so uh exploitable in that way yeah um and just like
Starting point is 00:42:52 it's that last half an hour it's so goddamn boring to me i'm like falling asleep is so unengaging and just really yeah i can't stand it yeah i'm serious like i'm it's boring as fuck to me wow because it's like it's the same thing as that first movie where oh you had all these chances and all these opportunities to to deal with this or just the world the film sets up is so like dumb like the first one but without the humor so like what is carrying it outside of like oh it's just getting more and more edgy but there's like a pregnant woman in there who's got her arms aren't even tied up and she can just free everybody and all of this this kind of stuff and people are just like characters will just pop in for a scene and just be doing like the edgiest thing possible yeah that
Starting point is 00:43:35 That seemed the therapist. Jake, you say something. I can't. It is funny how easily all of these people could just get out of there. They're like barely tied. And there's like, how many are there? Like, there's a warehouse full. Like, they were like 12.
Starting point is 00:43:53 It was 12, I think. It was to escalates it. Okay. And then they're all like, they're all attached with like scotch tape and staples. It like, it's just like. you can overpower this guy. I mean, I don't know. It was just like so stupid once it got to that point.
Starting point is 00:44:11 But the problem was once it got to that, the last half hour, the whole first hour is just so stupid and boring. It just makes you think like, okay, there's no logic or reason to any of this. None of this has any consequences. It's just this guy is just murdering random people in a parking garage for the first hour. And then talking to his mom who just calls him vile, horrible shit. And then that's it. There's like, what are you doing with the body? He, like, puts a baby in the car and it's like, just leaves the baby there.
Starting point is 00:44:44 Like, I don't know. There's just, none of it felt tangible. It just felt like very, whatever. Yeah. I will say, I would compliment the framing. I do kind of like the starting off point, like a mega fan of the first movie. I think that's a little bit clever. It's trying to get meta with it, but it can't carry that cleverness to anything actually
Starting point is 00:45:03 interesting. Yeah. I liked it. She steps on the fetus to drive away. It's perfect. What the fuck? That was, okay, okay, I'll tell you guys that there are three moments in all these movies that actually like was like fuck. No.
Starting point is 00:45:25 Uh-uh. For me. That was the, anything with the knees, I'm like, I got it. I can't look at that. Like that, for whatever reason. I just, I can't stand that. When he's hammering the guy's teeth, all right, that was gross. And then the fetus was just like, I was just kind of like, all right, dude.
Starting point is 00:45:45 Like, all right, bro thinks he's Hieronymus Bosch. He thinks he's so, like, edgy with this painting of agony. And I don't know, it was just like, fuck off, you know, this is annoying me. To me, so, okay, here's what I liked about it. I liked that it felt very shitposty. Like in the way that like, yeah, there are no rules anymore. This is not taking itself seriously. And in that sense, I feel like, you know, the weakest parts of the first film for me were it trying to instill some sort of sense of like tension or fear or like genuine horror in some way, which I just felt like it just didn't really succeed at that at all.
Starting point is 00:46:31 Whereas this film, it felt like its goals were just to be disgusting. And it didn't matter if things made sense. And to me, there was a humor to it as well in its ridiculousness. And it just went so far into how ridiculous it was that it does work for me. Like, much of it does work. It's entertaining. It's stupid. It's silly.
Starting point is 00:46:55 I love how he's just like, he'll bludgeon people. and he knows exactly the velocity to like, the difference between killing someone and knocking them out. And also, every time it shows him doing it, it's like the daintiest fucking thing. Like the actor might as well just be like casting a fucking magical girl wand and like saying a fucking hocus pocus spell.
Starting point is 00:47:20 Like, whopha, right? But it like kills people. And it's just, it's so silly. It's so funny to me. I love it. It just felt like a student film to me. I think that's why I was like the first one I was like oh this feels like a movie This one felt like I've seen like edgy crappy like low budget
Starting point is 00:47:38 Like this could have been a 20 minute short you know just like of the last part of the movie whatever If you want to be gross if you want to be weird or whatever but like it just felt like so Lazy like the sound effects the music was just like trying to be like almost like a David Lynch like creepy like eerie Like it felt like it was taking itself so seriously that's what like bugged me I didn't feel it. It felt like he was trying to be a taxi driver. You know? I felt like it was done with so much irony.
Starting point is 00:48:06 That was basically my experience with it. It really felt like, yeah, it felt like a big shit post kind of, you know, not quite like Lars von Trier or anything. But, you know, like in the same vein where like the purpose is to just fuck with the audience. The purpose is to just make something that is shocking and stupid. Like, he gets the, they have the original. like actor show up and then have her talking about like making the first movie and these, you know, the meta aspect kind of clues in, I feel to the ironic nature of it.
Starting point is 00:48:43 Like it's, it's a movie that's telling you it's a movie basically. And it's almost as if it's operating in similar logic to like, I don't know, like one of the terrifier films where it's just like, yeah, it doesn't fucking matter. We're just like, we're just showing some shit. We're just killing. We're just doing gore. We're just, it's nonsense. It's absolute nonsense, but I love that it feels as though it's aware of that, and it's not trying to do like a straightforward, like, oh, what if they escape and like, oh, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm almost free. And then he says I'm going to get the middle piece. Like, all of that just, I could, I don't need it. I don't need it. And I feel like this knows what it is the most out of every one of the human set of films. And I enjoy it for it. I feel like, I get the vibe that he feels like he's pushing boundaries and like. I mean, he is.
Starting point is 00:49:29 Jesus. Like, there's the reason why there's a censored version is because, like, the UK literally just wouldn't accept it. They needed to cut four minutes out of it, right? Like, this film's so fucked up that, like, it's banned in a bunch of places and, like, just needed to be edited to even get released in a lot of places. Like, it was pushing boundaries. Like, I think it pretty, you know, definitively was.
Starting point is 00:49:53 I guess, yeah, I don't really give it much credit for doing that because it's, like, That's all it is. Like, exactly. All it is is it's just trying to upset you. Exactly. But at the expense of, of like,
Starting point is 00:50:06 an atmosphere or logic or anything that, like, actually would get me involved in this. Like, when the mother character, she, there's a scene where she, like,
Starting point is 00:50:17 just slits her wrist. Nothing happens. And they just walks over to the bed and gets a scrapbook out. And so, what? There's not even, like,
Starting point is 00:50:25 consequence to any of this. It's just completely random. And it feels like the script is just a string. of like, hmm, what would be the edgiest thing for me to possibly do or say next? And that's the only thing that dictates what's going to happen next. Oh, there's a pregnant woman in the centipede. Isn't that so extreme? This is just extreme on extreme on extreme. And that's all it is. There is some ironic humor there for me, for sure. Like, there's some funny stuff.
Starting point is 00:50:49 The performances are, they are hilarious. They're like so bad. We're saying they were bad in that first movie, but they're even worse here. It's set in the UK for some reason. It's It was actually shot in London. I don't know how the hell they like paid for that. Well, how they found the people for this movie because of the scale of it. And it's like 12 naked people crawling around in a warehouse. I guess that's how they kept costs down was most of it is just in a warehouse. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:15 But the stuff these actors are saying. Some of it I don't even feel comfortable saying. Like quoting. That whole scene with the therapist character in the car. Yeah. with just some random bald dude you know what your pussy smells
Starting point is 00:51:34 gorgeous like what are you doing like you're just being an edgy teenager it feels like a 15 year old wrote this yeah yeah but I like I feel like it it's being what it is
Starting point is 00:51:48 and not pretending to be anything else you know I feel like I feel like it's honest about it it's not pretending to do something different I guess so I mean I guess I just don't like what it is fundamentally, you know, at least I guess it is trying to do just what it's doing. No pretense of like story or plot or anything like that or character.
Starting point is 00:52:09 Yeah, I mean, I got to say like props to finding people who will be like, this was full, putting your face in someone's butt crack, you know, for hours on end. Like, that was that casting call? Like, I don't know. props to these people, you know? Stop them tears. You're just making Daddy's Willie harder. That was a good quote. Yeah, that's in there a couple times.
Starting point is 00:52:38 Did you like the Schindler's List reference? Oh, maybe I didn't catch it. Yeah, like the little girl in red. It's the poo is the only color in the movie. There's poo on the camera is brown when it splats on the screen. I don't know if I would call that a Schindler's list reference, though. just like selective color. We didn't mention the film is black and white.
Starting point is 00:53:01 Yeah, but like Sin City did that too. Like I just felt like it was a choice. I don't know if I would call that a Schindler's List reference, but it was a choice that I liked. I thought it was awesome. It was apparently the only reason it's black and white is because no one would let it get made otherwise because it's just so violent.
Starting point is 00:53:20 And it kind of hides some of the violence. The same reason of that kill bill scene. Is that what it says? I'm pretty sure. It was showing color, from what I understand. And to turn it into a black and white phone. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Reading production.
Starting point is 00:53:39 According to six, he intentionally made full sequence very different from first sequence for two reasons. First, he was writing the script at first sequence. He knew people would want more blood and shit than is shown. Second, the two parts reflect the different characters. The colored first sequence with a slow-moving camera fit the story of Dr. Heiter, while Martin Lomax's character required a dark and dirty film.
Starting point is 00:54:02 Six shot full sequence in color, but was always thinking about black and white and realized while editing that it was much scarier that way. It was also Six's idea to have little dialogue in the film's second half except for moans, grunts, screams, flagellants, whimpers, and Martin either laughing or crying. So when I watch this, I know that there is a big, list of films, you know, I don't know, that, that have had to change their color grading
Starting point is 00:54:32 because of censorship. But in a way, you know, almost kind of works out better. I believe Kill Bill Volume 1. Like, there's one scene where, like, that was the, like, I don't know if that's like a pop culture factoid or if it's like real or just made up. But the story is that the black and white sequence in Kill Bill Volume 1 was, with the crazy 88's, was to get past. like a NC-17 rating or something. But, you know, even in Kill Bill, I feel as though that as an artistic choice makes it more interesting.
Starting point is 00:55:07 And in this film, I mean, I love that it is kind of, you know, doing the black and white thing, almost kind of in like a weird shitposty way. Like, I wouldn't care too much about it if it weren't for the selective color grading in that one. scene because it's that it was that moment where the first time I was watching it it like really
Starting point is 00:55:30 clicked I'm like the the fact that you're deprived of colors up until that moment makes it pop out more and makes it so much more disgusting it's it's it's spoilers for Xavier exa vallin's mommy you know it's like that scene without saying too much like taking taking what is throughout the entirety of a film like a really claustrophic Phrostrophobic framing and then changing that, right? You're adding something and adding an emphasis to it by being restrictive for the entire film up until that point. And it's a good choice and it's disgusting. But it makes it feel more disgusting and that's the goal.
Starting point is 00:56:16 And it's funny. It's hilarious. There's no other film that would do this. It's a very unique thing. I'm thinking like about pink flamingo now. because that's like a disgust film but I respect that film in ways I don't with this one for some reason
Starting point is 00:56:31 I don't know it just I don't know it feels like just so much about it is just superfluous it just doesn't matter like the whole framing of him being like a security guard in this multi-story in London and he's whipping out a gun and like pepper spray everything so you don't even care about the setting these things aren't even legal in the UK
Starting point is 00:56:53 But then like the ending too Where like is the implication that it was all a fucking dream Yeah exactly I'm like Like that's fucking annoying Nah yeah I That it takes it It just exemplifies how little
Starting point is 00:57:13 It takes itself seriously to me Is that it's admitting like it's a shit post the entire time And that's why I like it I gotta say I just respect the fact that the sequel is so different from the original, you know? Yeah, true. I feel like if you wanted to just do a shitty cash grab, you could have just done the same thing over again, you know?
Starting point is 00:57:36 But, yeah. And I think most franchises would go in that direction and try to keep like a formula going. But like these three movies are very different from each other's tonally and, and like stylistically. Like, I don't know, there was some creativity on display. So it's all right. That's art. It is technically.
Starting point is 00:57:57 I don't think AI could have produced this. Not yet. Not yet. Some of the like prosthetics are quite good. Yeah. You mentioned the teeth knocking out scene. That's quite a like effective scene as far as how it's put together or the the knee slicing stuff. Cutting the insides of it.
Starting point is 00:58:18 It's like that that's quite well done. I just wish it was in something I gave a shit about because. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it just feels edgy for the sake of it. Like, just gratuitous for the sake of it. And that's all it is. All it has is shock value, nothing else.
Starting point is 00:58:32 But at least it actually delivers on that, which was not the case for the first film. You know, that's what I wanted is like, if you're going to call the film the human centipede and if the whole catch to the film is that it's shocking, then deliver on the shock. Deliver on the gore. And I feel like this film did that. And the effects, the practical effects, super well done. super, you know, disgusting, squeamish. And it, you know, despite the logic of this one being like, oh, duct tape and staples,
Starting point is 00:59:04 like the visual, I'm glad they actually show it, you know, instead of just like hiding it with fabric and, you know, use your imagination. They actually show it. And I think that's really cool. And yeah, it's ridiculous. It doesn't make any logical sense. But it is disgusting and they do, uh, they do disgust. They'd show it.
Starting point is 00:59:24 They show it well, I think. Yeah. I really have nothing more to say about this one. I'm just... Sure. I guess my... I want Dita Laser, and yeah, I want some of that gore. I just...
Starting point is 00:59:42 This main character is so boring for me to watch. It just becomes predictable and repetitive after a while. I was like, oh, I guess he's going to kill someone in there. Not going to resist or do anything. And he's kind of like a super hero. as far as like how he can how many people you can take out and never get in trouble with anybody. And it's just like, yeah, once you get to, I guess, the payoff towards the end where he starts putting it together. And then it gets like to that scene of him taking the tools out of the bag.
Starting point is 01:00:10 And it's just going on and on. And it gets to the fourth tool and the fifth tool. And it's like, what are we doing here? What are we proving with this? Yeah, even though it is the payoff towards the end, I'm like, falling asleep by that point. It's so boring. and like, yeah, you've like made your point. Yes, you're very provocative.
Starting point is 01:00:30 You're very good at being disgusting. We got any other tricks up your sleeve? No, you don't. Okay. Oh, now you're going to kill the baby. Now you're going to do this like gratuitous sexual assault scene with barbed wire. Now you're jerking off with sandpaper. Now, oh, what else can we do?
Starting point is 01:00:44 Let's get a decapitation in there. It's like, come on, man. It's just fucking lame. Love it. I'm giving this one a low. Six out of ten. Oh my God. Sinners score?
Starting point is 01:01:03 Hell, yeah. Bates. Oh, my God. Baste. Very unbased maybe. I'd call this one a Normie masterpiece. I'm so offended that you would say that. I'm giving this one out of ten, half star.
Starting point is 01:01:25 Yeah. I'm a joke on this one, half star. Just lame, man. Just fucking lame. Boring. I, yeah. This is, this is the best one for me. I would watch this movie.
Starting point is 01:01:37 It's so silly. It's so fun to me. I'm happy you like it. Thank you. Let's move on to the, the final sequence. Sent to Pete. Final sequence.
Starting point is 01:01:50 Directed by Tom Six, with a five metastrope. score out of 100. Nice. This one to me is my least favorite. I find this one, if I were to categorize it, it would be unwatchable would be the category. Like, it's just, to me, this one's really fucking boring.
Starting point is 01:02:14 As much as I love Dieter Laser, he couldn't carry the film and just with how repetitive it is and it doesn't feel like it's going anywhere. So, you know, a lot of similar criticisms that you had about the second movie, Alex, I just, I felt with this one. Yeah, it wasn't, it wasn't as shocking as the second one. It didn't live up to it as much. Like, sure, there's, like, maybe two or three moments of, like, weird, disgusting gore that just, like,
Starting point is 01:02:45 feel disconnected from the rest of the movie even. Like, it just, I don't know. Like, it doesn't feel like it's in contact. of anything just like oh time for this shot of gore I guess like it just yeah it's attempts at humor also do not work for me so it just yeah that's also partially to me way it's the funniest one I knew I was in for a treat when the the tagline is 100% politically incorrect this is such a cringy film very holy shit it's so cringy and it was giving me like flashbacks to what YouTube was like around like
Starting point is 01:03:19 2015 but like the punchline of every, like, YouTube parody was, like, some kind of disgusting gore or, like, essay thing. And it was like, oh, my God, it was like a little flash into that past. Oh, my God, it's so ridiculously cringy. And, like, you said, it is different, I guess. Like, it's a straight up, like, comedy, political satire. Yeah. Which just falls utterly flat on its face.
Starting point is 01:03:46 And to me, I kind of feel like the first movie where I just, like, watching Dita Laser do his thing. And yeah, he's like screaming every line and there's no subtlety to everything. And there's not a single, like, good joke. Like, it's all crass and disgusting. And when I was like a teenager, I wrote this story called The Buffalo, right? And it was just like wrong, just like disgusting. Just all teenage angst, like just no one should read it and just embarrassing. And this film has Buffalo energy.
Starting point is 01:04:16 It just feels like if the other ones felt like a 15-year-old, this is like a 12-year-old that's just discovered these edgy concepts for the first time. And yeah, we're just going to be as racist as possible. We're just going to be as disgusting as possible. We're going to act like there's something to this, but it's like, it's so embarrassing to me that it kind of came back around to being funny, like laughing at it. I'm never laughing in earnest with the humor that it's trying to bring.
Starting point is 01:04:39 That's for damn sure. But like the fact like Eric Roberts is in there and like. Talking cat. These people. And Tom Lister, like both in the dark night for the record. Nice. That shit was making me laugh and reading about the whole falling out Dita Laser and Tom Six had a few years before this movie got made where they couldn't agree on the script. And yeah, I found a really good quote.
Starting point is 01:05:09 According to Laser, when the script arrived, I took the 100% politically incorrect 100% too seriously. I was blindfolded, only saw the extreme horror, didn't realize the comedy in it, was shocked to the burn. afraid and stubborn, and it escalated into my refusal to play the part. Thank God Tom did not give in. He didn't change the script, but he also didn't give up to try to convince me, and finally he managed to open my eyes for the hilarious vitriolic comedy in his THC3 script. I love when I shorten it.
Starting point is 01:05:39 And this meeting triggered the beginning of a wonderful creative time by developing together the character Bill Boss. In January 2013, the legal battle between six entertainment company and Dita Laser drew to a close as Laser agreed to play Bill Boss, because yeah, they tried to sue each other, or one tried to sue the other. Laser reflected on the situation declaring, I never ever would have thought that all our differences and misunderstandings would, in the end, lead to an even deeper and warmer understanding and appreciation of each other.
Starting point is 01:06:05 In this regard, I'm actually thankful about the whole fuss because it turned out to be an advantage and a wonderful present for our film and for our friendship. Isn't that beautiful? Yeah. Bringing some people together. What a heartwarming film. What do you think, Jake? Low key, the best of the trilogy.
Starting point is 01:06:33 I think that I'm more inclined to like it just because I feel like it's the more cartoony and like the gore isn't as realistic. It's just like very silly. Even like the actual like sewing the butt to the mouths, like it's very like loony tunes almost. It is so racist and horrible. It is, it's trying to like shove your face in the dirt and mud of rather, not the gore, but like just the most idiotic excesses of like, I don't know, America and like the prison system. I find it very interesting that this movie is set in a prison. I like the concept of like this warden just going mad with power. Deider Laser kind of gives an amazing performance.
Starting point is 01:07:31 He's like doing this Jim Carrey. He was doing everything. He was giving full commitment. Like I think I would have liked it way less if it was even just like a slight notch down in terms of commitment. He was so committed. Like I feel like Nicholas Cage and Vampires Kiss level like going. for it every single scene. Like I could barely understand him
Starting point is 01:07:55 through his German accent, you know. Maybe I'd like it less if I could actually hear what he was saying or understand it. But just the screaming, the yelling, the sniveling, the whining, you know, how he goes from just this egomaniacal. Like he's doing like Sheriff Joe Arpaio.
Starting point is 01:08:12 I don't know if you guys know what that is. He's a notorious Arizona sheriff, Maricopa County, known for like abusing you know prisoners and stuff and humiliating them he's like doing sheriff jo rapio but um like this cartoonish like cowardly dastardly version i don't know i just found it kind of like a little endearing and enjoyable um it it felt very like the kid a kid just learned how what satire is, you know? But didn't really.
Starting point is 01:08:50 It's like satires when you scream. You know. Yelling is funny. Yeah, just like, oh, I can do this. I can say all the bad stuff if I say satire. And sort of like you, Alex, I just kind of like looped around to being like, yeah. Like, yeah, this is funny. Like maybe not in the way they intended.
Starting point is 01:09:13 But it is like, it is so just over the top and. stupid and I kind of like how it, I mean, it has like a color palette. It has like some design and style. It is super sweaty film dumb to look at. Like it just looks so cheap and plastic and bad. But again, it's like doing something different from the first two. And I just kind of, I needed that. You know, after watching those first two movies, this was like a pop of energy. It's not taking itself as seriously as I perceived the second one to be taking itself. So I don't know.
Starting point is 01:09:50 I was kind of like, yeah, this is all right. That's funny. Yeah, to me, this film was just an absolute like exercise in patience. I just had, like, the first time I watched it was without subtitles and I couldn't understand a fucking word. Just Dieter Laser yelling.
Starting point is 01:10:09 I'm like, I don't even know what he's saying and he's just yelling the entire movie. That's the best one. Um, so yeah, watching it with subtitles is definitely an experience because you get to see the stark contrast between what you hear and what he's actually saying. I wrote down one of them like, I have a heart problem, like was supposed to be, I have a heart problem. That was like that. Yeah. And then, I don't know, like it felt like comedically it was trying to have its own interpretations.
Starting point is 01:10:42 of setups and payoffs, like the jar of dried clitorises that he kept eating. And then the woman's like, oh, oh, candy? I want some, after like sucking his ding-dong. Such a lamb job.
Starting point is 01:10:57 Yeah. And she's like, I want some candy. Oh, these are too salty. And then later he's like just chewing on. I'm like, is this a payoff? Like, is this like a fun callback joke? Like, oh, he's still eating the dried clitoris, jars
Starting point is 01:11:12 whoa yippee very cool so funny ha ha I don't know to me there was a really
Starting point is 01:11:22 illuminating moment when when Tom Six appears in the film I guess it's the only time in the trilogy where he actually shows up that's himself to like jerk off his own films
Starting point is 01:11:32 and he's so unbelievably bad that yeah it ludes back to being hilarious he's it's so fucking cringe worthy whenever he's on screen
Starting point is 01:11:41 that I find it really funny. And I found this BBC article where it was talking about this film and he says, But Six says his vision is not gore for the sake of gore. And then he's quoted saying, These films have a lot of layers. They are dark comedies.
Starting point is 01:11:55 They are horrible films. Not horror films, he says. At the same time, he concedes, I have an urge to shock. It gives me pleasure. And that's so blatant from this one in particular, where it's like, I was getting out with the second one
Starting point is 01:12:10 where it feels like, we're just doing this to try and piss you off. And you can clearly tell that he's getting pleasure from pissing you off. But this one feels like that attempt at comedy gives it like another angle that I guess just works for me in the inverse way that the second one does for you, Adam, where it is just. So it's going for like, I guess it's fitting with like the America setting. It's going for like scale and like, yeah, trying to have this like prison industrial complex commentary. And it's called like, what were the prison? what's called the George H.W. Bush State Prison.
Starting point is 01:12:44 Yeah. Talking about like Guantanamo Bay and all this dumb shit. It's like so on the nose and so goofy and so clearly a Dutch guy, like trying to satirize America, that it's really funny to me from that kind of angle. And then when some of these lines that D.Tal laser is coming out with, a Jew behind a Muslim, a Crip behind a blood, world peace. This is like, this is so ridiculous. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:13:09 It's absurd to the extreme in a way that I guess. works for me. Okay. Kind of ironically. I just, you know, honestly, the more I think about it, I admire the just the energy and the vitriol is showing towards the American prison system, which part of me is going like, if you're going to make a parody and a satire of American prisons, like, American prisons, like, American. American prisons are horrifying. Like, it's just so evil and so horrifying, especially like I grew up, growing up in Arizona, Maricopa County, Sheriff Joe Arpaio was like probably the most notorious sheriff in the whole country. And he, I, he came to my high school to speak, you know, like he was headlines, you know, big Trump supporter, whatever, massive like violations of human rights. Just really, just growing up in that environment and especially this movie set in the desert, I just felt like it is very much. drawing from that world in that energy, that to see it so, like, stupidly portrayed, so over the top was kind of cathartic.
Starting point is 01:14:20 Like, yeah, like, there's this sicko, weird European dude who's obsessed with weird butt stuff is like, he kind of can see the perversion behind this entire setup of the American prison system. He sees what is so fucking disgusting and like fetishistic and disgusting about it all. You know, like he and I just kind of was like, yeah, fuck this shit, you know. I don't know. There's something about something there for me at least. So the commentary worked. Yeah, kind of. Because it's more, the prison itself is more shocking than the actual like centipede solution that they wind up. It's like the inverse of the second one. It's like an afterthought. Yeah. Yeah. That really is like the, oh,
Starting point is 01:15:06 such a silly part of the movie at the end of the movie. But what I love is that the whole time, he's so obviously psychotic. He's like shooting people the second he gets there or like trying to shoot people. He's literally cutting out a dude's balls and then cooking them and eating them. And I just love all the authority figures coming in
Starting point is 01:15:23 and being like, if you do something like this again, we might have to punish you or we might have to fire you, you know, just be careful. You know, like there's no consequences whatsoever. And the guy from the second movie, he's always like saying, think of the medical expenses again and again. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:15:41 The communistic cigars thing with some kind of funny shit like that. I mean, it is over-the-top satire, but it's like, it's already an over-the-top situation, you know? I don't know. Yeah. I like how they hold up DVDs of the other movies. That's good. Yeah, and reference like the South Park episode. It's like just Tom Six and shucking.
Starting point is 01:16:06 himself off. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. It just, I felt like I didn't love the like ugly yellow color palette. I just didn't, didn't like the overall visual style. It is ugly. No, I dig it. Some of the, like, the continuity in terms of like how things were shot was just like so embarrassingly terribly done. Like when he climbs and falls out of the window, it literally just like cuts to him in the sand somewhere, but it doesn't look like he's like even near a building. But the implication in the chronology of how you're
Starting point is 01:16:48 organizing the shots, like the implication is that's him after he fell out of the window. But it's like, okay, you're just like in the middle of the sand somewhere else. Right? Like there was just no continuity to it. The second one does the exact same shit, though. does it as much yeah like you know there's that whole gag well in the second one where there's the neighbor above them that's playing music too loud and they keep knocking on the the ceiling um the second time they do that they knock on the ceiling and then the the dude the bald dude from above just like appears yeah like the doors like in a similar way where it's like what like you just
Starting point is 01:17:28 cut to this and there's like no i guess the doors just always open here or like what is happening here? Yeah, that's fair. To me, I felt like it was more shitpostie, the second movie. More than this one. Yeah. Because this one, I feel like this one's,
Starting point is 01:17:47 in terms of like what it's going for, this movie's trying to be funny. And I did not gel with the humor at all. I thought that the writing and jokes were like absolutely atrocious. To me, you know, watching a, watching someone fail at doing comment is like just really, really, really not a pleasant experience. See, I love that.
Starting point is 01:18:10 I love the cringe it makes me feel. Like, that's hilarious to me, like, how cringy that comes across. I feel like it's trying to be, I mean, yeah, it's trying to be funny, but also I think there's some awareness of, like, not worry, like, take the jokes to such an exaggerated point that it does, like, loop around to being, like, almost self-aware of. how, like, I don't know, like, how far can you take a stupid joke about eating balls, you know, like it's just so drawn out that it almost, again, it becomes, like, it becomes, like, funny to me.
Starting point is 01:18:48 Like, you're just, it's like one of those dirty dog jokes that just goes on and on and on and has no fucking point. And it's like, all right, yeah, if you want, if that's the point that there is no point, then fuck it. I don't know. It's the longest one, too. Yeah. minutes longer than the other two.
Starting point is 01:19:04 Very long and most of it is literally just yelling. I know, but he's doing, he's doing, he's doing Kloskinski doing, like, John Wayne, you know?
Starting point is 01:19:17 That's funny. I don't know. Like, he's just so endearing in this role. I don't know what it is. An endearing role. Yes. Put that on the cover.
Starting point is 01:19:31 I love when he just started screaming, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing. There's so many good lines from him. He's just crazy. He's just so crazy, this dude. On his wiki, it says that you made a contract with the devil at 14. He's just a character, man.
Starting point is 01:19:45 I love watching Detail Laze. Now, he's missing from that second movie. He is. You know, it was like 2 a.m. when I finished this movie last night. So, you know. I'm sorry. You know, I had to watch it in the middle of the night. Or else I risk exposure.
Starting point is 01:20:04 My child to these films. Good Lord. I'm like, yeah. Is he going to just bash the door open? I'm just like happy that this was the last one because it felt like a bit of relief. Like, okay. Like the first two is, I'm like, yeah, I'm susceptible to gross out stuff. But this one, it felt like this was the Evil Dead 2 of the series.
Starting point is 01:20:29 Or no, this is the Army of Darkness, you know? Yeah. Okay. That's not a bad way to put it. Sure. Similar quality. Or like what's the sequel to Texas Chainsaw? That was like a comedy.
Starting point is 01:20:40 I guess Texas Chainsaw, too. I haven't seen it. I don't know. I like when horror directors kind of take the comedic route with the franchise because it's so connected, horror and comedy are so interlinked. True. I'm not saying it's a good movie. I'm not.
Starting point is 01:21:00 It's just my favorite of the three. Wow. Okay, great. I don't have much else to say about this, so I'm fine giving ratings. I want to just bring up a couple of comments. I screen shots from the wiki. Yes. They're just like, what the fuck?
Starting point is 01:21:16 This one was actually from the first movie from a fandom user. This was in 2018. So wait, dogs eat their own shite. So why would the dog be sad to be placed in the middle? And also, what would happen if the first dog laid down? I want to know details of this three dog, specific details. Please reply as soon as possible, thanks. Wow.
Starting point is 01:21:40 Did anyone ever reply? No, that one didn't have one, but this one did get a reply. Surgeons are the most dangerous people in existence. A whole last year later, someone replied just saying, yep. And the last one I got. One from 2020, a fandom user. I found this page by accident while looking up for my six-year-old the difference between a centipede and caterpillar. This page is completely offensive and is not protected by the first, as it feeds to not just illegal activity, but anti-human activity.
Starting point is 01:22:15 I wouldn't help a fan of this crap for anything. Anyone who enjoys this sick shit isn't human. Lacks all humanity and is an enemy. Period. Just seeing this page is scary. I want legal counsel for damages, as should any human who stumbles on here. Now that's a normie There you go
Starting point is 01:22:36 Oh god Yeah So I was getting some good entertainment from that That was great Thank you for sharing Yeah that's good I mean when you think about it The dogs
Starting point is 01:22:46 Dogs don't have mouths like humans So how does that even work You know? Oh Like dogs have no You stick the entire snout up Oh I see But then how are they breathing
Starting point is 01:22:57 Oh shit I'll text my good friend Tom Six and ask him Just do the cinema sins ding, you know Oh yeah Oh god, yeah So ratings for three Yeah I can't stand it This is this is
Starting point is 01:23:14 Absolutely unwatchable for me One out of ten I just I can't It's It's cringe in the wrong ways for me Okay Right yeah It's cringe in the right ways for me But I'd give it probably the same score
Starting point is 01:23:29 as that first movie, one and a half stars or a three out of ten, but this one gets a like. Nice. It's a like, a little heart. I'd give this the same as one as well. I'd give it a two out of five. Nice. Yeah. We loved it. I loved it.
Starting point is 01:23:52 Well, you know, I think this was a pretty good discussion. This could have gone worse. Yeah. So thanks for picking it, Jake. Uh-huh. Yeah. Totally. Well, you've got some fucking payback coming your way. It's just saying. Oh, no. Help. Question time.
Starting point is 01:24:16 Let's do some questions then from the Sardinacost community. Like I said, Sardinica is really strange either. Head over to the suggestion thread over on the subreddit. If you want to leave questions for soup, future episodes. man I'm sorry I've got to put you guys through this but it has to be done just for my sake and I'll give you some context I guess once I really I know I know what question you're going to ask you know already I hope you're happy man final afternoon 3 319 can start us off here if you three were put in a human centipede who would go where this is a traditional film accurate human centipede not a weird sex position to stop you from battling over who goes first, this is a four-person human cent to be. What? Where Shane Dawson goes at the front.
Starting point is 01:25:02 Also, if Shane Dawson has to either choose to eat a pizza made out of Brad Pitt's penile cheese or Margot Robbie's scrambled ovary, extracted eggs. Which would you rather eat the digested version of? This is Shane we're talking about here. Sorry, say that whole last sentence again. Okay, okay. Did Tom six write this? Did Tom six write this?
Starting point is 01:25:26 It sounds like it, huh? Yeah. So, this, I don't know, this, maybe it counts as a mild form of harassment. There's a dude who's been asking this question for years. Wait, why? I'm talking years on the jar media subreddit. Oh. Like, he's been asking this question for years.
Starting point is 01:25:44 Oh, like specifically, wait, wait, for years, but about the jar cast and not us. Yeah, yeah, yeah, not in this. And Shane Dawson is in it? He referenced, do you want me to read that? that last bit again. So that, wait. Because I guess he's trying to. Shane Dossett, wait, so you were asked this question in the jar subreddit and Shane
Starting point is 01:26:05 Dawson was always a part of the equation? It might have like, it's been iterated on. I'll put it that way. Well, like, he's refined this question over years, I guess. I don't remember Shane Dorson always being a part of it. I think it did get included at some point in the years of him asking it every single week. And he promised that he'd stop asking it. if I read it on this episode,
Starting point is 01:26:29 saying it's a bit thematic, you know? So honestly, I don't even know if you, you can veto this if you want, because like, I'm a father, man. I have a kid. Well, I just don't like that Shane Dawson is in it. I think that makes it more. Well, you know, we could change Shane.
Starting point is 01:26:45 That's your problem with it? Yeah. I think. Not the scrambled ovaries? Oh, I still, you're going to need to repeat that part also, because I just don't know. I was zoned out when you were talking about that one. I was stun-locked a bit.
Starting point is 01:26:59 What about ovaries? My God. Also, if Shane Dawson had to either choose to eat a pizza made out of Brad Pitt's penile cheese or Margot Robbie's scrambled ovary extracted eggs, which would you rather eat the digested version of? You know, so imagine it's the dog bowl. Yeah, this is just like... Overy eggs.
Starting point is 01:27:21 I guess. That's more like food. I mean, like... What do you want me to say here? I'm assuming they're cooked if they're scrambled. Yeah. You know, I lost a lot of my dignity and pride just by watching these films, so I'm just going to refrain from answering this one.
Starting point is 01:27:39 I completely respect that. I'll just say I'll take middle. I don't care. Yeah, my logic is like, yeah, who cares? It's all like the same experience pretty much. If you're not allowed to go at the front, like, I guess maybe the back, because then someone doesn't have to eat my poop, but I'm going to be dead anyway.
Starting point is 01:27:55 And like, just, fuck you, dude. That's what I'm saying. But then you get the worst tasting poop. But you'll be dead. You might die the fastest. Or it doesn't even filter down. Maybe it's like a water purifier. Like, it just, I don't know.
Starting point is 01:28:10 I'll go middle because I could probably handle it mentally better, you know? I would sacrifice myself. Navy seal training. Yeah. It's crazy. I would do it for the good. Assuming that I don't hate the other people in the centipede, I would sacrifice myself for the greater group. That's why we love you, Adam.
Starting point is 01:28:33 That's, yeah, you care about us. That's nice. Yeah. Jesus. I mean, as a normie, I couldn't handle it. That's why Shane Dyson makes it difficult. Because I don't like it. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:28:50 Yeah. Okay. Oh, my God, okay. Whichever one's not touching him. Let's pivot. He's had too much time in the sun like this. I gave a good answer. All right.
Starting point is 01:29:06 Yeah. Let's do this one from an unlikely ad 9-850. Where do you stand on the 100 men versus one gorilla debate? This one was asked a surprising amount. Has a gorilla ever, like, killed a person? It came close with Rambay. but obviously didn't. There are no confirmed cases of guerrillas.
Starting point is 01:29:32 Wait, that's an AI answer. I'm not re-ended that. They're quite gentle, I think. All right, we're talking about 100 men. Like, I think 20 guys could take a gorilla. You know, like, yeah, you're going to take some casualties, but, like, you just, you rush them. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:29:49 It's a gorilla. It's one thing. I feel exactly same. 15 to 20, and you're good. You're golden. Yeah. You could take down Willie mammoths. I don't know why.
Starting point is 01:29:56 that one gorilla would be so much more of an absurd thing to do this, unless, I guess. Yeah, are we allowed to use tools or are we all naked? I think everyone, I don't think there's any tools involved. I think even if we were all naked, we could kill the gorilla. Yeah. I think us three, no, but maybe some three, like, really strong guys, maybe. I saw some semantics around the idea that, no, it's one at a time. It's one v ones
Starting point is 01:30:27 No But it's like No I feel like you're stretching it there It's 100 men versus a gorilla No You're just saying one guy versus a gorilla That's a different thing Hmm
Starting point is 01:30:36 Yeah no I mean I don't like it When people try to equate gorillas With like grizzly bear I feel like a grizzly bear Would be far more difficult Yeah I think I agree
Starting point is 01:30:50 Yeah I'm more scared of grizzlies Also people way overestimate their ability to defeat a chimpanzee. Chimps are nightmares. They are. They are super strong. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:31:03 Yeah, guerrillas are just big. That's my, that's my opinion. I think we solved it, boys. We solved it. I feel, yeah, I feel like 100 people could kill a gorilla. Uh-huh. Yeah. I think we're in agreement.
Starting point is 01:31:15 Yeah. Let's do this one from Jizzas. What are your opinions on the new GT-6 trailer? Oh. Why's fire? It's so good. Um, there's one shot where like the guy's shorts are like a little, a little stiff. Like stiff.
Starting point is 01:31:32 Yeah. So it's unplayable. They need to work on the details a bit better. I get, you're disappointed. I don't know. I'm excited. It looks good. I like the lighting.
Starting point is 01:31:43 I think that marketing is great. Yeah, the vibe. I'm shocked that it's even worthy of discussion that it's delayed. Have people been born yesterday? What do you mean? Yeah, it got delayed and then people are... Who was it? Like, Tim Poole tried to, like, connect it to some culture war thing and was like...
Starting point is 01:32:05 Really? Yeah. God's sake. But, I mean, I guess that's just what he does. Upset that you can kill cops in it. He was talking about how, like, it's bad that people aren't working? It's like people are lazy. and that's why it's delayed or something?
Starting point is 01:32:27 I don't know. Oh, man. It's, uh, yeah, I mean, every, every rock star game ever has been delayed, right? Yeah, it's like the cycle. Yeah. They say a release date.
Starting point is 01:32:39 They don't, they don't reach it for like two years. And then even when it's mere months before coming out, it might get a few more months on top. Yeah. And then it's a good game and they don't release an unfinished piece of garbage, right? So, yeah.
Starting point is 01:32:50 I mean, I'm curious also on the level of like, I don't think it's ever been. And again, a game this expensive ever released. They would have spent over a billion dollars making this by now. It's been in development for about 12 years or more. Just absurd.
Starting point is 01:33:07 And it kind of looks like it, too. I'm excited. I think it looks amazing. Yeah, I hope it's good. I have zero opinions on this, but I'm happy for everyone who's getting this. Yeah. Well, what about your opinions on this one by Surge Engine? What movie would you recommend to someone with a TikTok attention span
Starting point is 01:33:27 trying to get into movies? It might not be for you, man. If that's what you need, like crazy stimulation constantly, every speed racer. 12 seconds? I don't know. I don't know. I feel like someone who's just like only viewing TikTok and stuff
Starting point is 01:33:51 would actually, feel so nourished by any movie, like even a bad movie. Just watch Harry and the Hendersons, you know? Like, just a story with a plot and characters, you know? That's a fun poll. Yeah. Just go watch Harry and the Hendersons and you will see God if you've only been watching TikTok. Isn't that how, like, TikTokers watch movies?
Starting point is 01:34:14 They watch, like, Finding Nemo in 58 parts. Yeah. You know, I think that the kids are the kids. I think that people who are on TikTok and only watch short form content are like waking up, or not waking up, but just like valuing movies in a new way and like long form stuff. You know, I think there's like a backlash and like thing, the culture, you know, shifts back and forth, obviously. So I think we're going to have a new Bella Tar movement, you know.
Starting point is 01:34:45 Hell yeah. Dude, when the TikTokers discover Shantelle Ackerman, it's going to be so cool. No, man, yeah No, the movies that go viral on TikTok Always like the strangest, like what? Megan is missing That movie is like boring as fuck Holy shit, how did TikTokers have the attention span for that one?
Starting point is 01:35:04 Jesus Yeah, crazy work Yeah, I don't know, maybe just You don't have to If it's that much of an upward battle To even like get into the art form Like maybe it's not for you You don't have to, you're good
Starting point is 01:35:18 You're fine, stick to your TikTok Mithrigan. Mithrigan 2.0. That was called or does that have a clever name? It's Mithrigan 2.0. Oh, right. Mithrigan 2.0, right. Cool.
Starting point is 01:35:29 I'm going to mention this actually now, just since we talked about it. Oh, yeah, good idea. Yeah, they're trying to make it so that you're on your phone in the movie. So they had a special screening of Mithrigan, the first one, to test a... They call it like an AI chat bot, but it doesn't even... seem to actually be like AI and somebody from Variety wrote an article about their experience with it where essentially there was a a second screen chat chat butt that they did a special like re-release of the first Mithrigan for and I think they're planning on doing
Starting point is 01:36:09 it with Mithrigan 2.0 probably in some screenings hopefully not all of them but anyway essentially before the film it tells you to like message the account on Instagram with like a and just like put in a hashtag and you're supposed to do that right when the Blumhouse logo shows up. But the person writing the article accidentally did it when the Blumhouse logo showed up for one of the trailers
Starting point is 01:36:36 and not at the beginning of the film. And so every single like factoid that was given to him by the Mithrigan check butt was out of sync and too early and there was no way to fix it. And apparently he was the only person in the theater that did it. He sat at the back and nobody else pulled out their phones even though it told them to at the beginning of the movie. So it just seemed like something that nobody wanted to do. And it seemed like...
Starting point is 01:37:01 What's it supposed to add? Okay, let's see. I'll get some quotes. So apparently it says, it said, hey, Peter, miss me. Of course you did. Become your bestie. And then gives instructions on how to proceed. And then told me to click, switch me on.
Starting point is 01:37:18 I'll spill the tea about making my movie spelled with a three instead of an E and tell you what really happened while you watch and so it's kind of like a weird role playing dumb thing So you're role playing while a movie is Yeah
Starting point is 01:37:38 What? Yeah, one of the quotes Loll period I wonder how they named Mithri as in me but with spelled with a three and then here's another line from the article. I found myself wondering, was Mithrigan really going to substitute threes for every year in our three exchange three? In fact, it wasn't an exchange at all.
Starting point is 01:38:01 You can text the Mithrigan account anything you like, but it doesn't reply. Instead, it just spits out pop quizzes and trivia, according to some pre-timed script. Do you answer questions, I asked, silence. So, like, yeah. It's funny how shitty that seems, but more shitty the fact that Jason Blum and co are trying to start having people have their phones out the entire film? That seems like a bad idea. Yeah, that's a good precedent. So, yeah, let's encourage that.
Starting point is 01:38:38 Let's make that worse. Do Minecraft screenings with a Steve AI. Yeah, what's the, why? He says chicken jockey. What's the point? Why do you want that? This made me almost as depressed as the second human centipede film. So thanks for that.
Starting point is 01:38:55 Well, it seems like it's not going to take off, I guess. Oh, my God. Do you know how much money Mthregan made? Yeah, I guess. Oh, a bunch. Yeah. God, I just looked up the worldwide gross of Mithrigan won on a $12 million budget. It made nearly $200 million.
Starting point is 01:39:10 That's so easy. Why? I liked it. It was fine. It was a big. special. It was a little bit funny. I'm a little worried that the sequel is going to lean too hard into being like a meme
Starting point is 01:39:26 fest, you know, like, oh, people thought the first one was so funny because it had one scene of this little girl dancing, you know, and now we're going to do Terminator 2, and it's going to be even more like dancing and memes and stuff. So I don't know. Sometimes you can lean too hard into it. I think in the trailer for the second one, the line. said was like hold on to your vaginas. Okay.
Starting point is 01:39:52 Really? Yeah. I haven't seen any trailer. Is there a TikTok trend yet? That's really the success indicator. I don't know. I think they're trying to make one, but. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:40:01 Manufactured. Oh my God. Cool. Well, we'll hype for M3 gun 2.0. Yeah. It's even longer. It looks like two hours long.
Starting point is 01:40:08 Sweet. Yay. I don't think I'm going to watch it. Yeah. I don't really want to. I'll be there. I will be there day one. Don't worry, guys.
Starting point is 01:40:15 I'll report back. That's just. June, M3 can summer. Let's do this one from no category. 6343. If you're placed with the task of remaking a movie, which would you choose? I've actually got a recent one that upset me to my core that I would confidently remake, and even me on my own, I feel like I could do a better version than what wound up happening with them. Did you see this Jake?
Starting point is 01:40:42 The electric state, the Russo's Netflix movie? I did not watch this one, no, but I know a lot of people did. Or not a lot of people did, apparently. Yeah, so I watched this piece of shit film, just like a complete throwaway. Like, what the hell, blockbuster garbage is this? But I'd seen some of the artwork from the book, like a few years ago and always thought it looked intriguing. And after the awful film, I was like, there's no way the books like that. So I picked up the book and read it in a few hours.
Starting point is 01:41:15 It's only short, like it's mostly these like landscape shots and it's like, God damn, did they miss the whole point of it? Like in a way that's like one of the craziest, like, wow, you just didn't get this at all. Like, or you didn't care about this? And I feel like you could make a really contemplative, quiet leaving stuff up to interpretation, like 90 minute, all about like landscapes and almost like a road type apocalyptic like, hellhole film, which those who have seen the electric state know is not the atmosphere or tone or vibe that's going for, even in the slightest
Starting point is 01:41:52 and all of the potential of the idea is just completely missed in that adaptation. So give it a remake where they actually give a shit and don't have like Chris Pratt and dick jokes and stuff. Because wow, yeah, they missed the memo on that one.
Starting point is 01:42:09 Hmm. That's a good one. Adam, go ahead. I'm still thinking. Yeah, I thought recently about like the fact that we're stuck in this stupid trend where remakes seem to be made of things that are already successful and popular, whereas I feel like the things that are ripe for remake would be things that had something going for it, but you know, not quite there and could use a different interpretation could use something to get it going and to fully realize itself.
Starting point is 01:42:51 And so I thought recently about the fact that like, you know, we see Silent Hill 2 got a remake. It's like, okay, well, that you could just play the original game. You're not really adding much to the experience by modernizing it. It's, it's annoying how we got a remake for Silent Hill 2, but the one that could probably use a remake the most would be Silent Hill 4, a game that I love. but like there are things that you could definitely improve upon there are things that you could you know like actually fully flesh out like it has so many weaknesses despite my love for it that a remake would be cool you could iron things out so yeah I guess for
Starting point is 01:43:33 films in that same vein I would remake a talking pony that would be a good one to remake yeah yeah just so close to be being a masterpiece, but like not quite there. Cool. I'm going to go, man, I don't know. I feel like there's a lot of them where you see like older films that are like, oh, that's pretty good. But gosh, it could have been better if they had just taken this angle or done a little
Starting point is 01:44:03 more here. Like with a modern lens, it could be really a good movie. I'm thinking about when the Coen brothers redid true grit. which the original True Grit is a good movie, but I think they improved it somewhat. I would similarly do another John Wayne movie. I would do The Shootest, which I think was his final movie. He was like dying of cancer. That's a good movie directed by Don Siegel.
Starting point is 01:44:36 But I think that it would be so perfect for kind of unforgiven style Western today. I think that would be a really good, interesting movie with some, like, I don't know, some big star that's kind of like an older action star or something. I don't know who it could be now. Who could fill that role? I don't know, maybe Tom Cruise in the shootest. Yeah, that's what I do. Yeah, there's probably like a bunch of stuff that I'm just not thinking of right now. I'm scrolling through all my ratings on IMDB, like,
Starting point is 01:45:13 you know that's what I was doing fucking I don't know like Alien 3 XX pony boy Derek XX that could have been done a lot better
Starting point is 01:45:25 once upon a studio changed the design of scar you know that could have improved it um I don't know there's a lot of bad things there's a lot of things
Starting point is 01:45:39 that could be done better there's basically the answer is just anything that's not already perfect, or not already close to perfect, I guess. Yeah. Agreed. Let's do this one from Small Fart, 1, 2, 3. Do you think YouTube as a platform was always doomed to lean towards the route of promoting content rather than the content of expressing oneself? What do you think caused the platform to prefer the content it often pushes now?
Starting point is 01:46:07 Is it really just that more people tend to really prefer watching Mr. Beast and right-wing conservative junk or was there something else that pushed YouTube this way? What do you think should have happened so that YouTube maintain the image of expressing yourself and or do you think there's still hope that this will become the main page of YouTube? Thanks you lads for the laughs. It's money. I don't know. It's just that. Yeah, once you start monetizing it, then it's going to be shittified at some point. I was thinking about that as far as like Twitter's concerned too, where it's, I remember when Twitter was kind of fun in like 2013 and like you could like talk to your audience and it wasn't about like audiences clashing and enraging each other and then the added
Starting point is 01:46:47 layer of oh you can make money on twitter now and then it's all just like AI bots basically farming ad revenue from a rage bait shit yeah yeah yeah so it just always happens once you start monetizing it in certain ways um yeah it's just yeah it's an inevitable byproduct of monetizing it right So people were expressing themselves when it was a platform where the point was expressing yourself. Right now, the point of starting a YouTube channel is to make money. Like people go into it as a business. And when that's the idea, it's not really about expressing yourself. Sure, the two can coexist in ways, but like the overwhelming amount of people on the platform are doing it for money.
Starting point is 01:47:34 Yeah. I mean, yeah, I mean, it's just capitalism. I mean, the thing is YouTube is so vast that there are niches you can find that's just like, yeah, we're just doing it for fun. A lot of Booktube, you know, is just people who aren't like, hey, this isn't going to become a profitable thing. You know, this is just for fun. Like, there's tons of that. There's lots of variety there where people aren't looking at it that way. But I think that YouTube has done was so successful at giving an opportunity for anyone to just find massive success.
Starting point is 01:48:04 And they sold that so well through that. their platform that it feels like it is one of those things like making a TV show or being like a professional writer in a writer's room or something. And like it feels like one of those things that's slowly closing off to people in that like it's becoming less achievable or sustainable, you know, because of how it is just becoming so corporatized and all of the, I don't know, like all these huge, like all. All traditional media is going through YouTube, too. So it's not like you're competing with other random people.
Starting point is 01:48:42 You're competing with NBC and CBS and Disney and all that. Jimmy, yeah, him especially. Yeah, he's ruining YouTube. So, yeah. It's actually crazy how long it took them to twig on to the potential of YouTube as far as that stuff. It's concerned. They really did have horse blinders on, like, for so long.
Starting point is 01:49:03 Yeah. As far as, like, another avenue to build audiences. So that was, yeah, I've got fond memories of before Jimmy Kimmel. And all that was a big, big dominating force on it. Because then, yeah, then it just becomes about excess. And then all these like, oh, I'm like the son of an oil baron. And I can just make YouTube shorts about my mansion. And everyone's just going to gawk at it.
Starting point is 01:49:26 And then that's like YouTube shorts. Or it's just an AI farming. Hey, who would win in a fight? Are the Hulk or Batman? And it's just like AI, genera. shit with just random images like squirting all over the place it's just so insanely
Starting point is 01:49:42 oversaturated at this point that's why we're special you know we're just doing it for the love of the game hell yeah yeah exactly and well I mean we're trying to make a living at the same time but the goal is to express ourselves yeah if I wanted to monetize the shit
Starting point is 01:49:58 out of what I was doing you know there's so many ways you could do that if all I cared about was the clicks and the ad revenue that I would be doing things very differently. That's what I didn't get. So why did you have to make all the money? You like there's a balance. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah, I mean. You can really see it like how cynical some of these channels are. It's like it's like it's like,
Starting point is 01:50:21 it's like not a single like voice behind this thing. It's like a machine. Yeah. Yeah. All right. One last question. Right. Let's end on this one from betting flee 95. What's a movie where you love the movie itself, but you absolutely hate the impact it left. For me, it would be the first Guardians of the Galaxy. It's quite a good shout. So many films wanted to be there after. On the superhero trend, I'd probably say Spider-Verse. It's like, oh, wow, there's potential here. Now let's just do everything Spider-Bers, I guess. We'll do Ninja Turtle Spider-Bers, even though it's good. I mean, I would rather have, like, close to Spider-Verse clone than everything being Pixar clone. You know, we still have, like, a bit more variety from that, even if it is, like, kind of creatively bankrupt in ways.
Starting point is 01:51:17 For now, we'll see. The, like, so-shaded thing is already starting to get old for me as far as, like, this isn't really, like, a fresh thing anymore. It feels like, yeah, kind of like a Guardian's thing. there's potential here. We can milk this or like the Lego movie type thing. I feel like that movie comes up a lot for some of the precedents it's set. But all the copycats and the ideas that it inspired, like just no one can normally gets it. It's the perfect brand movie.
Starting point is 01:51:50 It really is. It's just like it opened the door for new IPs. I liked paranormal activity for being like an indie horror movie that was made for no money that, you know, the whole premise was just like, how do we film this cheap and do something? And it worked and, you know, word of mouth and it got really successful. But I hate what it spun, you know, like I hate, I hate all the sequels are shit. That entire, like, era of, of like, spoopy, paranormal, just awful low budget movies in that time period. suck. And then I also hate how it like discouraged saw from continuing to release a film every year.
Starting point is 01:52:33 So that will always go down in history as being like one of the worst things to ever happen. Well, I feel like Blair Witch kind of deserves those flowers, right? And it did a similar thing with like all the, uh, the copycats of the, oh, we can make these horror movies really cheap and not like show anything, um, but miss the whole point of Blair Witch and what made it cool. Yeah. I'm going to say Pulp Fiction because that spawned, um, Like, I love Pulp Fiction, but there are so many shitty, like, ironic, trying to be funny crime movies, ultraviolent with, like, obvious needle drops. And it's just of that era that that was just like, it kind of killed crime movies for a while, in my opinion. All right.
Starting point is 01:53:14 Yeah, that's cool. I guess that's it. We've done it, boys. We done it. We've done it. We did it. Woo! Now it's time for my punishment.
Starting point is 01:53:24 Oh, man. time. Do you want to tell them? I feel like, yeah, we were going through lists of tens and tens of movies until Jake came up with an idea. A good idea, a prescient idea. I'll say the first two and then you say the third, right? Okay, cool.
Starting point is 01:53:43 There's three. There are three. Oh, yeah. If that's okay with you. We want to do the early 2000s Fantastic Four films followed by, go for a Jake. Fant Forstick Okay, cool That's not torture
Starting point is 01:53:58 Yeah That'll be fun Oh, oh You're you're dying inside You're so angry You're so mad I remember I remember watching
Starting point is 01:54:05 Fant Forstick in theaters And it was funny Bro is so mad right now He can't Have you seen the other ones At him The Tim Story ones Okay
Starting point is 01:54:16 I forget Oh yeah The Rise of the Silver Surfer Was the sequel Fantastic So okay wait What are we got Yeah, 2005.
Starting point is 01:54:25 Yeah, so 2005 and 2007. Yeah. Rise of the Silver Surfer. So I believe that I watched them when I was younger, but I just have zero memory of them. Like, I know for sure I watched them when I was younger. Hmm. Okay. But not fresh in any form.
Starting point is 01:54:42 Yeah. And then Fantforcese. Okay, cool. It should be fun. All of them. Yeah, sure. Fun. Fun.
Starting point is 01:54:51 If you mean torture. You're so pissed right now, dude You are like so angry I can hear it in your voice Like we got him We got you dude You got me mission accomplished Okay
Starting point is 01:55:04 Yeah if you don't If you don't want to be spoiled For Fantastic 4 2005 directed by Tim Story And Fantastic Four Rise of the Silver Surfer 2007 directed by Tim Story What his name is Tim Story
Starting point is 01:55:21 That's his name. My name's Tim Story. I direct movies. Fantastic 4 otherwise known as Fant Forstick, 2015, directed by Josh Trank. Then watch them before the next episode comes out. They're released every two weeks. You can listen to them early.
Starting point is 01:55:41 Go into sardonicast.com. Sign up for premium or patreon.com slash sardonicast. Or click the join button on the YouTube thing. sign up as a member. It's super cheap. And also, if you don't have YouTube premium, it makes sense because you don't get ads, right? When you listen on Patreon, when you listen on our website, when you listen to the members thing, you don't have to hear no stinky, dumb ads.
Starting point is 01:56:08 And we already don't do the sponsorship thing. Maybe we will at some point. You never know. We could have gotten a good hello fresh sponsorship for this one. Stop naming brands that aren't paying us. We don't do that Yeah, help us out Help us out everybody
Starting point is 01:56:29 It's sponsored by Duolingo Shut up Did I forget anything Oh yeah Start on a cast highlights channel You can check that out Subscribe And have a
Starting point is 01:56:44 Yeah, stinky Fants Forstick Have a happy Whatever Stinky cent a bead. Yay. Bye, bye. Bye, everybody.
Starting point is 01:56:54 Thanks for listening. Bye you. Bye.

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