Sardonicast - Sardonicast 96: Malignant, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre

Episode Date: October 4, 2021

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Three, two, one. The podcast you are about to listen to is an account of the tragedy, which befell a group of three 20-something-year-olds and a 30-year-olds, two 20-something-year-olds and a 30-year-old. In particular, Ralph Seppi and his invalid brother, Alex, it is all the more tragic that they were young, but had they lived very long lives, they could not have expected, nor would they have wished to see as much of the mad and macabre

as they were to see that day. by the way the word macab is just absolutely ruined for me I'll explain it in a second this is Adam from your movie sucks that was a quote from B movie this is start on a guest recommendation yeah Texas chainsaw

yeah Ralph movie maker hi I'm from invalid everything productions I do love that opening crawl though it's amazing yeah yeah it they all have

opening cralls really well what's wrong with macab Well, so I don't have it's such an uncommon word, you know, like it's, it's not used that much in day-to-day conversation at all. You barely ever hear it, right? It's only in certain contexts. And you know that that meme? So people have taken like really bad acting from like porn movies and just posted it on YouTube, just not including the porn scenes, just the acting scene.

And there's this one that spawned a meme. It's a gay porn. And it's like, oh, shit, I'm sorry. sorry for what my dad taught us not to be ashamed of our dicks right and that's just like a huge meme bunch of twitch streamers sample it and shit and there's a smaller uh lesser known section of the film where one of the actors says i can't believe this story you're telling me it's macab and just the way he says it is so funny that every time i hear that word now i'm like ah fuck it's ruined i can't hear that word anymore a nice word i like macab it's a cool word

it's a good word it is specific enough to be easily ruined though I see what you mean yeah yeah I need to read more literature or something I think that's where I'm gonna find it people don't just say that word out loud a lot speaking of things being ruined what's the fuck's going on with the Mario movie

what's happening there I have no idea about this amazing casting that's what is it better than the old one John Leguizamo and Bob Hoskins That's a classic that I have in the scenes I'm not going to go into it That movie is terrible

But there's no one Who's the cast now? What they got? Do you want me to list these off? Yes, please. I've got the list here. Let's start with the big one. Chris Pratt as Mario himself. What?

How do we feel about this? I know. I saw Dunky's reaction too. It's so funny. Just what the fuck? Yeah, it's the one that stands out the most to me It's like, how are they going to do that? What voice is he going to do?

Is he going to do like an Italian accent? He's just going to do his own voice. He's just going to do his own. It's going to be the Lego movie. I don't know. So he's going to be Emmett from the Lego movie? No, he's not even going to fucking do that. He's not even going to fucking do that.

It's a me, Mario. They're just going to take the Mario skins, like the skins of the characters and then just have these like regular actors playing themselves sort of thing. That's like, that's what I'm expecting. Yeah. Because honestly, what's his name, Charles Martinette? As much as he is the voice of the. character. I don't know if I could fucking handle an entire Mario movie with like a bunch of

dialogue. It's a me! Like the entire fucking... I don't think I can't fucking handle a Mario movie full stop. I think it's just a bad idea. In a video game, it's different. They're all like cartoon characters. Well, I mean, they're like sound effects to like jumping. He's not really having a lot of conversation. Most of it's text. Yeah. Whenever you have a cutscene in those games. Blu-bling. Yeah. Well, I half expected them to kind of invent their own character just for the movie or something like that or have like a kid is sucked into the game type thing. I don't know. But I guess that would be better.

That actually sounds much better than what they're coming up with probably. Yeah. Get some meat Mario. Yeah. As Peach, it's Anya Taylor Joy, sort of a trending actor right now. Yeah, I don't see. She's not so typecast yet that I'm just going to be like, oh, that's impossible sort of thing. Like, even if she was trying to replicate the original Peach, I can imagine like, oh, if she does a different voice, then sure.

Like, that could, if they were trying to recapture that. Yeah, reading like anyone's name after the Chris Pratt one just seems like nothing in comparison. But Charlie Day is Luigi. How do you feel about that? It's funny. Charlie Day? Yeah. There's some reason I can see that work here more than everyone.

No. That's funny. Oh, do you not know that? What the fuck? No, I didn't know any of these. I think I heard about Chris Pratt, maybe, like being really honest. I'm probably got a genuine reaction here. But the rest of them, though, that's so bad.

Did you see another pictures of, like, Danny DeVita? edited to be like Mario like from always time. Like the fresh memes. That genuinely would be better. Yeah. They could have done something like the Sonic movie. Bowser.

Bowser's a weird one. We got Jack Black. Jack Black's voice at Bowser this time. Yeah, it's just be a voice, right? Yeah. They should all be animated. They should use like the models from the games. That's what I think.

And then kind of go with your ideologics. Like they either come out of the game where a kid goes in. Like, I think that's better. This makes me think they're just going to be set in the game just straight up all in universe like weird what was the merry game that actually had voice acting the one time they tried it and then quickly abandoned oh i have no idea sunshine oh really yeah like it had really weird cut scenes with like bowser had a voice and uh bowser junior and they talked to each other and it was all very strange yeah so i'm kind of hyped to see how they're gonna pull off

jack black is bowser poe from confu panda's gonna be bowser yeah okay um keegan michael michael key is toad Alright Miss the chance To have like Like illumination is already familiar with Kevin Hart With that bunny character He's got a shrill like Toad I just yeah

I mean like if we're If if the goal is to recapture how they sound in the games Just get the game's voice actors But you can't do that Because then your movie doesn't get greenlit So clearly they have to just change what the goal is Yeah Yeah it's weird they

Like Toad gets a whole thing But Seth Rogen as Donkey Kong. That's funny. Really? Yeah, Pumba. Pumber.

Yeah, the last three. Fred Armisen as cranky-Cong, Kevin Michael Richardson as Kamek, who's that wizard, I think? Oh, okay. I know you're talking about it. And Sebastian Manuscalo, a spike. Oh, Sebastian Manuscalo, a spike.

Scalpo. He's like an Italian comedian. He's big, like a new... I'm just trying to think who Spike is in Mario. Well, Spike Lee is playing Waluigi. Oh, really? No. Yeah, some good memes are come out of this. Yeah. I like Fred Armistin. He's a little underrated, I think. Yeah. Can you see him as Cranky Kong? Does that make you hype?

I mean, my only interpretation of Cranky Kong is from the Donkey Kong animated series, which is like nightmare fuel animation standards for today, you know. I don't, I barely remember. I feel like he could pull it off even if he was trying to do that, probably, you know. I hope it's like that nightmare fuel show. That was awesome. I love watching clips of that. Yeah, that's a fun.

There's a VR chat world where it's literally just, they play episodes of that and the entire room is like Donkey Kong themed. That's so wrong. I know. It's just so creepy. Yeah, so. I guess what most people are not talking about, most people are just looking at the cast being like,

what the fuck, obviously. Not a lot of people are familiar with the fact that it's just illumination and what baggage that comes with it, right? So that's a whole different can of worms. And it kind of explains the casting decisions, to be honest. It's like, what were people expected? Yeah, definitely. It's not surprising.

It's just going for popular people. Yeah, just whoever's the biggest name. Chris Pratt is big. He'll be Mario. effort. I go to whoever's writing it as well. And we got Matthew Fogel who wrote

the Lego movie 2. Oh God. And Minions, the Rise of Gru. Oh, I'm Big Mama's that father-like son, so we're in good hands. That's like, yeah. That's the weird part, because then also Shigero Miyamoto is credited for the characters,

but it's like, the Nintendo not going to put their foot down here, be like, just at least get someone a bit more creative on board to write the screenplay. People don't know how to interpret those sorts of credits. Like when they credit that as a writing credit and put in parentheses characters, that just means they created the characters, right? Yeah, yeah. Unless they're credited as screenplay, they didn't have anything to do with the screenplay.

It's just they're using pre-existing characters from that person. Yeah, I just figured that because all the stories over the years, like when this was announced, they tried to make out that Nintendo were going to take this seriously. like really apply themselves more so to protect the brand so I'm curious how that will play out if it can hold back the illumination isms we all know and love but I really have no hope for this at all the only thing Nintendo is gonna do is like maybe say like that jokes too edgy or something like I don't know if there's a lot of integrity going into this project I think they might

just be like no sex jokes I don't know We got to keep Mario Pure. Yeah, we'll see where their priorities are from that first trailer, even though the casting has already... No, I'm just saying, but we'll see exactly what they're going for from that trailer when it drops and explodes the internet, because it's going to be huge. You think the title will shrink the amount of words they have? Right now, the full title is Super Mario Bros. Colin the movie. Do you think they'll just call it the Mario movie? Because that's really easy.

Just the Mario movie. Yeah, the algorithm monitors will figure out for them. Yeah, exactly. Well, yeah, I saw a comment saying, hey, don't, the Sonic movie turned out awesome, guys. Like, just chill. We're in good hands here. Don't judge it for it's out. It would have turned out worse if people didn't judge it before it was out.

Yeah. Right? Wasn't that the whole lesson to, wasn't that the takeaway? It was the opposite. I just hope it's as good as free guy. Oh, God. It's as good as Frig I was and I'll be very satisfied. I hope they like change all the designs of the Mario characters

to actually have like creepy like CG faces. Like it's actually just Chris Pratt like kind of on Mario's body or something. Yeah, I don't know. At this point just fucking do the whole thing ironically. Don't even make it animated. Just have Chris Pratt wearing a red shirt or some shit. Yeah. I don't know.

You can be a crazy man who thinks he's Mario. Yeah. We just don't make it. Like it's annoying. There's so many good video games out there and so many good worlds that could be elaborated on or explored in a fun way in a movie and I know they could be a good Mario movie like it could be done but God it would be difficult I think if a good Lego movie exists then yeah yeah but that was held up by those writers you know yeah needs a good idea

a good backbone but I don't I just don't trust this team yeah not not like we would ever expect like a fucking Mario movie to be great or anything you know could yeah I'm just scared what this is about like the Lego movie or anything. Yeah. Like if you told me the Lego movie, I'd be like, yeah, it sounds like shit. But it actually turned out good. Oh, yeah. I even thought based on the trailer, it looked like shit.

I was actually shocked when people were telling me to go see it. And it had like a crazy metascore and rotten tomatoes. I was like, okay. And I went to the theater by myself. And I was like, you know what? This was actually really great. That was like one of the biggest disconnects I've had from like expectations versus like watching the film. That's cool.

For sure. and like it got high reviews and it actually deserved it. It's like some movies that come out now. Like Free Guy, Free Guy is one of them. Got high reviews and it's really not that good. But, you know. Yeah. Whatever.

Anyway, there's other movie news. It's fucking our boy, Dennis Villanuevae. Or Denny Villeneuve, if you want to be pretentious about it. He said some stuff. He was asked about Marvel movies. And now it's at the point where there's been so many times where this has What was it? The last one was Martin Scorsese and then there's probably a few other ones. There's been so many times that this has happened that now people are actually just turning on the interviewers for asking these questions. A lot of people are like, can you just stop asking directors about Marvel movies? Because like, honestly, what do you expect them to say? Right? Yeah, he said some Marvel movies are cut and paste of the other ones. Let's see. Perhaps the problem is that we are in front of too many Marvel movies that are nothing more than a cut and paste of others.

he said. Perhaps these types of movies have turned us into zombies a bit. But big and expensive movies of great value, there are many today. I don't feel capable of being pessimistic at all. So that was his quote and a lot of people are angry. What do you guys think? So that's what everyone met.

When you read it like that, it just sounds like nothing. Like, who is surprised Denise Villeneuve? Yes. Feels this way about Marvel movies. Like, oh my God. Really? The guy who directed like Enemy. Yeah, that's the guy who loves Marvel. Yeah.

Even his big budget stuff is better than like Marvel movies. Even Prisoners. Like, Blat Runner. Prisoners is like a buy the books sort of movie, you know? But it's, I don't know, it's just really, really well me. Super great cinematography. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's just kind of funny because like when people are surprised that a director like Denny Villeneuve says this, it's like, it's like, it almost kind of speaks to like a just I guess a broader misunderstanding of what types of directors these are. Like, I don't know how anybody would be surprised by it. In the same way that like Martin Scorsese, like, yeah, what do you expect him to say

about Marvel movies? Martin Scorsese. Yeah, he directed taxi driver, raging bull. Yeah. Like, whether or not you think... And then watch like, I don't know, Black Widow. Whether or not you think Marvel movies are better than what those directors make, you have to at least understand that there is a difference between them, right? you have to at least recognize that they are different things.

So to expect them to be totally into the movies that they actively go out of their way not to make is kind of weird. You know, otherwise they'd just be making those movies. I'm sure they would get a great paycheck out of it, you know? Yeah. Marvel goes for like a very broad audience and they're not, they're not really. Denyville Love's not interested in that as much. He just wants to make something great and like have a vision of something. You know, you see an artist's vision carried out on screen.

There's a clear difference. He's definitely looking for an audience for Dune. I know that much. Yeah. Yeah. And I think it extends outside Marvel movies. I think Free Guy is one of those kind of movies too. It's just like a cut and paste.

But like any Hollywood movies, you see nowadays, a lot of them, especially Disney ones or any other fucking company they own. Yeah. 20th century Fox or whatever. Yeah. Here's my question, though. Is like, there are Marvel fans. I don't understand why they would get upset at someone saying that some of the,

Marvel films are similar to each other when like if they weren't then why would you watch them right like you're a Marvel fan because you like seeing that type of thing right like you're you're a fan of that type of movie if the movies were so radically different from each other then you probably wouldn't be a fan of them right like that's that's my thought process I guess they're very consistent and yeah they're very episodic where everyone's it's kind of the same but kind of different like not every single Marvel movie is the exact same, but there are some that are kind of similar. They have a formula and they stick to it.

Yeah. But, you know, it's better than not knowing what you're going to see and it sucks, which is what, you know, people have the experience of. People don't want to see a shitty movie. They want to see something that they're going to enjoy. If it has Marvel on it, they at least know that it's that formula. And like, yeah, it's safe. Yeah.

And then movies like Dune and Blade Runner aren't safe. You don't know what you're going to get. So that's why people steer away from it. And even those, I mean, like, there's a bit more certainty because A, big name director, B, previously existing intellectual property, right? But I think the kind of sad reality is that the majority of people don't know how to discover things that they like. And so that's why that Marvel badge, that seal of approval, becomes, like, very comforting to people. And not to, you know, if you like Marvel, that's totally fine.

That's good. Like, nothing wrong with that. but I do think that people would be a bit better off if they were able to navigate films and filmmakers in a way where they could be like, oh, here are these different factors and this might mean that I might enjoy this or that I might not enjoy it, you know?

Just even knowing who directed it is something that most people don't really know when they go into see a movie. It's mostly just actors. That's why they're on the poster. Hugh Jackman's in it. I'm going to see this. That doesn't mean anything about the film's quality.

It really doesn't. So that's why people see a movie and then they go like, ah, that was shit. And then they feel safer knowing like, oh, it's Marvel. Because they might not get burned as badly. Yeah. Why it reacts so emotionally to it? Like, I enjoy Marvel movies, right?

Probably definitely more than Adam. I guess me and Ralph, we've enjoyed what they've put out somewhat. But it's more of a discussion of there. There's some better ones. There's some weaker ones. It's not as simple as that. But also at the same time,

time you can break down what this director's saying and be like yeah he he has a point it's more complicated than just yeah this thing bad this thing good full stop like why is it always have to turn into that like apparently like the dune like reviews are being like review bombed by like angry marvel dance and stuff that's that's terrible this review bombing thing is just so toxic you like why would you how is that even relevant to the film oh it's not it's fucking terrible like people who don't even they probably don't even watch the movie they don't pay attention they just like fucking yeah they have their opinion made up already well I mean like what a shocker that people that rate highly the movies that they want to see before they're out would also

rate lowly films that they're angry that are associated with people that they're angry before they're out they're like hack critics yeah and they give every Marvel movie 9-910 or whatever it's those are yeah hacks they're not like they're not master anything that has a fan base basically is like susceptible to I feel like I broke it down pretty well. It's a very consistent brand that they have. Like, every movie you go see at least you're getting a decent movie. Like, you're getting a decent experience. And like Hollywood's the same way.

Like, you know, the whole studio system there, they just produce a ton of bad movies all the fucking time. Like, when you compare it to like Marvel, like Marvel's not produced as many bad movies as Hollywood has. You know? Yeah. There's less quality. I mean, there's less volume, but still it's just the system. Sometimes

you get a bad movie. Sometimes you get something better. But Marvel more often, they're just kind of bland. But they're not bad. Like, Justice League is bad. That's why I like the Marvel formula. Because at least you get something like okay, right? Usually shit. Like, like, Green Lantern. Yeah, I'm like more

interested in DC movies because I like seeing things that are like unexpected, even if they're bad. You know? Sure, but they're all so bad. I don't know. They're not entertaining. They're very boring. Yeah, there's the opposite approach. I bought Aquaman on 4K.

Yeah, nice. I don't know why you did that. Because it's epic. Ralph. That's the correct decision. Is this a good enough segue? Speaking of director, Aquaman. Yeah? We good?

Hell yes. All right. Speaking of James One, director of Aquaman, he also released another movie. That's right. A new one. A new one. And spoilers, because how can you fucking talk about this movie without spoiling the whole thing? I would say before we talk about it, watch it.

If I were to give my like really quick review of this without spoilers. I would say you have to suffer through the first two acts of the film, but the payoff in the third act is definitely worth it. That's my quick record. Yeah, I have not seen this film. I hear the third act in me. I don't mind. I don't mind.

It's okay. Go on. No, I don't know. Okay. I heard the third act, it becomes like John Wick or something. Basically. But that sounds kind of funny. You said there's just there's a certain scene where when it reaches it, it's like,

the prison scene, right, I guess is what you're referencing. But the big reveal seems towards the end. And yeah, I don't know if I've quite experienced this before where I was, you know, I want to love this movie. I love James One, the kind of movies he makes. I love the energy he brings, but God, some of his choices can be really confusing sometimes. Oh, yeah. And yeah, you're right. For the first, like, half, well, two thirds, there's some just questionable stuff.

And it's like, where is this going? What is the tone? Like, these music choices are so odd. Very conflicting tones. It's very conflicting. During that scene where it kind of reveals what's going on, and it does erupt into this crazy violent action horror, campy bloodbath, it did win me over there, and it made it feel more of a reward,

because, like, I was noticing during the early scenes, a lot of the kind of horror slash action moments with a sort of ghostly character that I just thought was like some kind of ghoul or goblin or something but it was like it looked like a human that was acting backwards and i thought that was just a sort of typical harm movie choice yeah yeah yeah oh shit i forgot about that yeah that's what i was thinking about it but yeah but i thought it was cool that that was actually part of the the story and it was like oh all those scenes earlier then were the main character were along it's like you've put in the work somewhat for this payoff to be to be a huge pay

and make it feel worth it. It's just, I don't know if I want to see it again anytime soon, and if it would make those previous scenes better. I'll see it again eventually. Yeah, that's the thing, because I do want to, and there is something, there's something odd and unique about it. You can definitely tell he's been working on, like, huge studio movies, like, with the way he uses, like, the camera and stuff in, like, action scenes now.

It's quite a funny contrast, because a couple months ago, I just had the urge to watch the original. saw. Hell yeah. And I was kind of, I was blown away by how reserved it is compared to his style now. So I thought that was a funny contrast. Like this movie, how kind of the level it's at now. And it either really works or it really doesn't with him, my friend.

Because I think he's actually really good at action. Yeah. He makes it interesting. I feel like he's really good with visuals. Yeah. Even just the conjuring, which I've seen from, that's a really good looking movie. Yeah. Cinematography's great in that.

I'm not upset at the end. upset at the action in his movies for the most part, depending on the scene. Because there's some, like, I don't know, there's some parts in some of his, if you want to go to Aquaman, like, just all done in a computer sort of thing. Yeah. But there's some parts that are really fun. And he's got, like, a real signature feel to, there's like a certain type of scene, a certain type of shot where it's like swooping around the character as they're fighting. And the depth of field is just like, certain. off from the rest of the movie

I think it's just like a wider lens possibly yeah he likes I was gonna say he likes those wide lines yeah in just in a certain context there's like yeah there's like that yeah I'm

there's like parallels between his movies of like a very distinct shot and a very distinct shot together I'm like oh two different movies but you you know it's like Quinn Tarantino's trunk shot almost or Michael Bay's yeah go around the character's 360 degrees sort of thing

yeah you can always his toe when he's directing. Michael Bay has a lot of those, yeah, telephoto lens, yeah. So to talk about what the fuck is happening in this movie, so a woman is in an abusive

relationship and gets shoved into a wall by a guy that the only other movie I've seen him in was Stephanie Myers, the host in 2013. He was one of the boys that Sersher Ronan had to decide which to kiss

and pushes her into a wall hits her head and she's like oh and then from that moment on she starts witnessing in a kind of an out of body experience these murders happening and she's like no I like see people as they die and then she like contacts the authorities and her friend and she's like no

there's a murder over here and then they go and they're like oh there was a murder over here you must be psychic and then it turns out as we get further into the movie that as she reveals her past, she finds out that she has essentially a conjoined twin but not conjoined twin because it's more of a parasite because it lives off of her to survive. And it's literally, in the goofiest fashion,

it's like its faces behind her hair in the back of her head and it's been controlling her backwards to commit these murders, but because it's controlling part of her brain, it's making her believe that she's witnessing it in a like in an out of body omniscient sort of like like I'm actually over here

when she's actually the one doing it but backwards not like backwards like tenant but like facing backwards yeah like the end of her first Harry Potter and so we you get glimpses of the villain earlier in the film and it's like oh just some like long haired creepy skinny like walks funny

sort of thing but then it's like oh yeah it's just her walking backwards and she's got like a weird face in the back of her head and from the reveal until the end of the film it like it's so satisfying and action-packed and just like nonsensical where it's clear from that moment on at least it's very clear what the tone is it's goofy fun

before that point the tone is not very consistent or clear before that point it's just a whole fucking jumbled mess of conflicting attempts at emotions. What emotion do you want me to feel? Yeah, it's fucking bizarre. How should I be interpreting this?

Yeah. Yeah, it's really strange. So you have to suffer through the first two-thirds, basically. And then you get a really satisfying payoff. All right. Yeah. Yeah. It's fun. It's a lot of fun. Yeah.

But yeah, I... It sounds interesting. Even though I've spoiled the twist for you, you can't really spoil the experience, because me just saying that it's action-packed and satisfying. That does not do it justice. Like, when you see the last half hour of this movie or whatever, or the last, yeah. Yeah, it'll be a satisfying watch even if you know what's coming.

But yeah, wow. Yeah, I just, I wish she was able to get that campiness and maybe a bit of commentary or something into the earlier scenes. It's just like awkward, clunky exposition and like kind of done-to-death procedural, like, cop stuff, you know. Yeah, and so much of it feels oddly rushed in the story, despite the movie being like what almost two hours or something what's the length of this maybe it's like an hour 40 or so oh an hour 50 yeah yeah it is quite long yeah slightly too long i'd say for for the premise at least for how goofy and silly it is yeah the music is way over the top well yeah because it goes from like

are you trying to scare me or you're trying to impress me with like action chase scenes you're just like what for the intro of the film and for the first i don't know like I don't think this feeling ever left me but I got the feeling that it was like a fake movie within another movie like the beginning of the movie I was like they're gonna pan back and it's gonna be what the character's watching on TV you know

it's like this is a joke right now right set up to mean something but then it never never was and so it was so weird yeah he just comes up with these concepts that are just enough and they're explored just enough to carry it and make it worth it because of that energy

he brings but like it would fall apart without him. Oh my God. It's just all about his his goofy take on it. Just taking that concept to its extreme, it's funny. I'm just reading over some of my notes

and just refreshing certain moments. Like, because the soundtrack was all over the place and I have this one line that I wrote down, wrote down, Sydney, I'm adopted.

And then just like, this badass 80s drive style music immediately starts playing like, blah, that's right. It's just like, what the fuck? It's just,

It's just, it's so confusing. The epicsy's song from Frick Club, really odd. But the action's really fun. Yeah, you mentioned the, um, the, wasn't it the amnesia. It has both like amnesia and adoption as like part of the way it's structured. It's so dumb. Yeah. Yeah.

A lot of fun action. It just needed a bit more tongue-a-cheek to make it feel like you're along laughing with it as opposed to like, what? What's going on here? Yeah. Yeah. There needed to be more clear self-awareness for what was going on in the whole first two-thirds of the movie. I don't know if I could replicate something with that film's tone if I tried.

It's so bizarre. Like, it doesn't make any sense. It feels like a disaster of a film, but at the same time, there are still elements that really work about it. What's funny is, like, this feels like more of a jumbled mess than, like, Aquaman in terms of tone and that movie was like all over the place too this is more satisfying for sure it's a better movie i would say yeah it's like a whole piece oh yeah it's it doesn't have the kind of ironic enjoyment i get out of the just bloat of something like aquaman this is actually just more james one and his roots kind of coming up with the fun horror concept and properly exploring it

well half properly exploring it i'm i'm curious how it would hold up on rewatch because like this is really one of them where that will be illuminating. I think my rewatch might be better. Yeah, I have a feeling it might be. Because on my rewatch, I might be more confident about laughing at slash with the movie, I guess. I might just not care as much knowing what's coming.

Yeah, I'll definitely give it another chance. It just, yeah, just slightly too long for the past series, I think. Also, shout out to Zoe Bell cameo in the prison from... Oh, yeah, yeah. Deathproof. Yeah, she works with Tarantino. Yeah. And also, once upon a time.

James 1 and Lee Wynnell are Australian, I think, so. Did either of you see Upgrade? Yeah. I saw Upgrade. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I enjoyed that. It has some really good action. Unique take on action.

Yeah. I feel it's, I can think of like two movies in the past five years where I'm like, this is a five out of ten film, but I really like it and I'll see it again. And that's Upgrade and Malignant. It's just. These two guys. Although the tone and upgrade is much more consistent, but there's just so much stupid shit. Upgrade, it's more clear what it's going for.

Yeah, that's a fun comparison, actually. The action in particular, and I see what you mean with that kind of that energy it brings. What would you give it? I think we've talked about this. Yeah, it's definitely not like a deep movie, I don't think, but any means. It's just kind of what it says on the tin. It's a fun concept horror movie directed by James Wan. and that comes with all the good and bad it brings.

So I give it a solid three star. I really like it. It could go up with rewatch or possibly go down, depending on how boring I find it with that runtime. But check it out for sure. I wanted so badly to give it a six out of ten, but I just couldn't, I couldn't forget about the first two-thirds of the movie. Yeah, I just love that.

When you end really strong, I'm just, I got to be careful. not to forget the rest of the experience. Fun movie. I think it's good. I think it's good to end strong. I mean, that influenced on a lot of people's reading. The best part.

Exactly. Fucking whiplash. Yeah. Super strong ending. It does feel like it's building to something. That's probably why people like precious. It's better than like a movie that gets worse. I hate movies that get worse as they go on.

Oh, yeah. A movie that gets better as it goes along. It's a little more interesting. Place Beyond the Pines. Yeah. Like the first third of that movie is fucking. incredible and then the rest of it sucks balls it's terrible so fucking cliche and corny all right it's time for the movie recommendation from Ralph yeah so I recommended a horror

movie for Halloween whoop oh it's finally it's from 1974 and it's called the Texas chain saw massacre that's a fucking great title although what's weird about it's So the title is that it's chain space saw, and all the other ones are just chainsaw as one word. So what's the proper spelling of chainsaw? Not sure. That is weird. If I look up the product of a chainsaw, I'm actually getting both. I'm going to just type chainsaw or chainsaw.

Yeah, it's really, on the IMDB page, the title has them separated, but on the poster they're joined. Oh, really? It's so confusing. Yeah. Well, Wikipedia says both are correct, so whatever. Oh, okay. It feels like one word to me. Yeah, they should have just stuck with one, yeah.

But as far as what the movie's about, I guess everyone knows Leather Face. He's like the serial killer that like goes through all the series. Spoilers. Jason Voorhees. Yeah, spoilers for Texas Chain Cell Masker. Leatherface is like the Jason Voorhees or like Michael Myers of the series. But like just again, in the plot, spoilers. Once it starts, it's not really that kind of movie like in the beginning at all.

It's not like a slashing movie. You follow these teenagers, which I guess is a little conventional, but they just kind of come across this hitchhiker and the movie goes down this whole other path. And then, you know, they go in the woods for a bit after the hitchhiker does himself. And there's like, it just becomes a very, it's like very unpredictable of the film. I don't know. And then toward the end is when it gets in a leather face and all that. And you discover this, um, that there's this inbred hillbilly like family that are cannibals also. And they, they steal these teenagers.

and make them into food and they eat them. And it's, it's really fucked up and kind of goofy, but at the same time, it's so, it's so blunt and visceral. It's so, it works.

It's considered one of the greatest horror movies ever. It's macabre. It is, it is scary. It's the cop. It's scary at times. Like, you know,

there's a lot of themes of, um, female, uh, oppression, I guess, or a female, um,

you know, being, I mean, you literally see a, a guy fucking chasing a woman with a chainsaw. Yeah. And like that imagery is really scary. Like the tone of this movie and the themes of this movie are very clear.

It's about like female victimization by men. And it's about violence. And it's about, you know, Texas, how fucked up it is. There's all these things going on that are so interesting and so intelligent within this movie that is really like it's just a guy fucking chasing a woman around with a chainsaw. And it works on basically every level, you know, I feel. I think it's a great horror movie. I'm curious what you guys have to say about it.

Yeah, I'm with you. This is my third time seeing it. That's all within 2021. I'd never actually seen it before. But during one of the lockdowns we had this year, I just randomly had the urge to check it out. And I only watched, I think, half of it at that time. So I just wasn't ready for that kind of vibe at that moment.

But then a few weeks later, I jumped back in and watched the whole thing. and couldn't stop thinking about it. And over time, just liked it more and more and then re-watching it again yesterday. Yeah, this is a really unique horror movie. And yeah, you were saying that just the dedication to this concept they came up with and the kind of the fokey tales of the kind of serial killer

that lives in the middle of nowhere in Texas, the whole hitchhiker angle. It's very authentically 70s. And the way it devoled, of it does feel so natural and like there is no like hardcore plotting even though there is like really good setups and payoffs

like the whole um sure the wheelchair character talking about the slaughterhouse and how like they don't die after being smacked for the first time and it's that's one that first kills goes down later on it's just really effective horror cinema that is

incredibly expressive as well through not a lot of like wasted time in terms of just talking and pointless dialogue like we were saying and um malignant earlier with like exposition it's not weighed down by anything like that it all it all speaks for itself and like the that setting of the house towards the end that's when it really like becomes truly horrifying to me with and reading about all the behind the scenes and how like the actual flesh and smell of that room and that texas heat and just how you really see the pain coming through on the performance and even watching

the sequels, because I've watched all the sequels, which we might get into a little bit, but they just don't capture that horror. Like, even the third one tries to capture some of the same scenes, like the end scene where she's running away from Leatherface, or like when the guy gets killed and Leatherface closes the door. Like, they try to recapture those moments, and they're just not as intense and they're not as scary. Because the way this movie captures it,

Toby Hooper directed this film. Yeah, I think it did a great job. They directed the second one, too, which is much goofier. Was his first feature as well? No, I don't think so. Oh, no? Well, I looked on IMDB. He had other credits.

I don't think they were all shorts. Sure. It looks like a very cheap movie. I want to talk about the look of it because I actually like that. I'm not saying as a criticism. It's shot on, I believe, 8mm film or 16 millimeter. It looks like a whole movie almost. Like, it's really low quality.

Yeah. And that, I think, adds a lot to it because it feels, even though it's a very goofy situation, the characters are a little over the top. It does add a layer of believability to it, for sure. And it makes you feel like you're actually watching kind of a snuff film, which is really scary. Like at times, like at that end scene when she's fucking getting chased by leather face, like that's horrifying. Like it feels real when you're watching it. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. It's really great. Yeah. Like a documentary. Yeah. It's really great like horror filmmaking. Like, oh my God.

The audience was like totally into this shit probably back then. Yeah. Here's the other thing is that like you look at the. origins of so many horror franchises Halloween, Friday the 13th, Nightmare on Elm Street. Which one's the earliest one? Because many of those go into, yeah, this is before Halloween. Halloween's 1978.

Yeah, so like, Halloween, I think. That's 78. Oh, yeah? Yeah. When was this? It's 74. So I think this might be, if we were to, if we were to say one is the one, I guess this might be it, you know?

Like what? Texas chainsaw. What was like successful? and, you know, inspired a lot of copycats, obviously. I don't know, correct me if I'm wrong. There might be something before that. Well, it is one of those, like, osmosis movies that you kind of know,

know, it's one of those pop culture. Like, you know about the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, even if you haven't seen it. Also, what a fucking title. It's inspired so many things. Yeah, it's an amazing title. Well, when you say the title, it sounds like you're describing an event. Exactly.

Did you see the Texas Chainsaw Massacre? Like, what the fuck is that? Yeah. That's a great. That's why it's a great. title um and they definitely did the whole this is real thing in the title card too it's probably helped you know yeah there this is a real story yeah that title card at the beginning i think it they do that in every movie because i think it really works it makes it feel more believable

um you see like the dead body and it's really disturbing uh there's a there's violence in this movie i want to add it's not really bloody like it's not that compared to like friday the 13th or like something like that it's more about the tone and like the sound, especially the sound, like the screaming and the chainsaw and all that. That's what makes it, like, really frightening. It's not about the blood and the gore. This what makes it so scary, the implied horror.

So I watched this one and the 2003 remake, and we'll get into that with more detail in a bit, but one of the things that really stood out to me in terms of contrast between the two is the way that the same. soundtrack is treated. Because in the 1974 film, the soundtrack isn't very orchestral, it's

more ambient, right? There's a lot of droney, kind of like creepy weird off-putting noises, but it's not doing like a minor chord to tell you to feel scared or sad, you know? It's so much more effective

at its tone, and then you go look at the 2003 one and it's literally just like oh god, like Like, it's going for actual notes, like an actual orchestra. Too much information, yeah. Score. And it's just, damn, it feels so much more manipulative. Like, fuck, you really want me to feel this right now?

Like, this is so late. Yeah. But it's just so much more effective in the 74 film. And Toby Hooper did part of the soundtrack, too. He's credited. Oh, yeah? Yeah. Yeah, the sound is one of the biggest contributing factors to the scares to me.

Like in horror especially, it's just so important to just putting you off edge and taking you to those places you don't expect. And they really do that. Yeah. Actually, in combination with the editing too, there's some really creative sequences and just like flashing of frames of like weird close-ups of skulls. And it's just like there's so much density to look like the frame in terms of the set dressing and just so much stuff to look at and the environments. it's there's a lot going on and you mentioned the whole kind of the the the the woman angle and the the way it's all explored through this kind of weird family this weird hierarchy where they've got like the the grandparents guy in the chair it doesn't love and yeah I was I focused I guess

more on the whole the slaughterhouse angle and it kind of taking the teenager characters and making them kind of go into a slaughterhouse and it's similar way to what the animals go through sort of sure there's definitely yeah there's definitely a lot of yeah

yeah you can kind of yeah vegan movie you can take a lot of meaning away from it yeah yeah yeah it's definitely trying to disgust you like meat

that's what Toby Hooper said about the movie he said it's about meat that's awesome that's interesting yeah it is what it's about it's about meat yeah you're made of fucking

guts Arby yeah like he's there's even that part with the disabled guy, he's like, he has a sausage in his mouth like a cigar and he's just holding it like a cigar. It's very, very off-pitting and gross. Yeah, yeah. I love the look of the house at the end.

Like, it's so detailed and so, like you said, you can feel the smell, like, or the disgust of them. And that's not something the other ones capture, I don't think. The houses are very bland in the next movies, or at least a few of them, like the third film especially. I noticed how, like, just bland. the house looked and and here everything was like there was stuff covering every wall there was like skin and like bones you know it was really gross like I like what you said about the plotting like it feels very organic how the teenagers get to the house you know like they pick up a hitchhiker it doesn't

work out they they can't they go to try find help because you know something went wrong and then they just kind of stumble across his house and it's just like the more they try to fix their situation the more gets fucked up yeah like it just don't delves into the horror And then that's the point we're in the, you know, the dinner scene, like, there's no escape. Like, how did we get here, you know? Well, they're all kind of unlikable idiots, too. Yeah, yeah. Well, because they're fodder to be killed by Leatherface.

I mean, it's still a horror movie. That's what every horror movie is. It's like, why do you care about these fucking characters? Because they're all going to die. Like, who cares? But I think there's at least, like, some uniqueness. Like, I really like the, I guess the fatter guy. I don't remember his name.

But, like, you know, the guy acts kind of weird. Like, he's just a really funny character. Like, really. annoying really like it just adds to the mood of the movie like the oppressive mood yeah Franklin the oppressive mood of the movie he's just like oh my god like who the fuck is this guy also starting your movie off with like this is a Texas chainsaw massacre and then you start the film as like oh one of these guys is in a wheelchair shit like fuck like this is not good like that that brings a lot of anxiety to just this situation like if you're to place yourself like in the mind of a

character so many people think when they watch horror movies like here's what I would do here's how I would get away. Then it's like, oh, if I was a guy in the wheelchair, I guess I die. What are you going to do? Franklin was a very memorable character, yeah. And even in like the third, I think the second or third Friday of 13th movie, they have like a wheelchair character. I think that's like paying tribute to that.

Yeah, definitely. The whole intro actually, even beyond just that opening text, like it has that kind of montage with the photographs and the creepy closeups. Weird sound. Yeah, it's really off-putting and creative. I wonder how they got that. Yeah. Yeah.

And it's like clearly the character from like the hitchhiker guy with his camera and how it all comes into play. Yeah. Really creepy atmosphere building. I feel like they really missed an opportunity and it's just a really subtle one. Because that sound at the beginning of the camera flash, like it's so distinct and memorable and creepy and weird. Like I don't know if they used a shitty camera to get that sound. But but then the hitchhiker guy takes the picture there and it doesn't make that noise. I'm like, damn, that could have been like a real creepy moment if you heard that same noise

because then it would be like, oh, it's the same. I don't know. I don't know if it was even implied that it was supposed to be the same. Like, maybe I'm just misinterpreting it. But that could have been like a moment. That's interesting. But that was just like a little bit of a missed opportunity. To bring it back to like the sound overall, I think that it's really easy to see why this

would stand out as such a visceral horror movie experience because chainsaws are fucking loud, right? And they're able to have these long chase scenes, like really long in ways where in most films it would feel like kind of, I would get kind of impatient. And just imagining how that would be done if the killer had a machete or a knife, right? It wouldn't invoke the same fear response. Because with the chainsaw, when I'm watching that shit happen, all I'm thinking is like, oh my God, like, as he's getting closer, like, she's looking forward and she would know that he's getting close. She might even think like she's done a little bit before it actually happens, you know? Like, because it's so loud, like, the entire time.

Yeah, yeah. It's just, it's like the, it's like the second half of climax. It's just like, holy shit, this is loud and terrifying. Like, it never stops. Yeah. And it never stops. Yeah, even in the dinner scene, there's like a lot of yelling. And it's overwhelming you would sound to kind of freak you out.

Yeah. Stardle you. Yeah. Like I could, like, like, Michael Myers walking after. I think that's scary. Like Michael Myers walking after Jamie Lee Curtis, whatever her name is. Yeah, yeah, yeah, like, that's scary to me. But, like, the chainsaw, yeah, that's, like, much more startling and immediate.

I hear people, like, they say, like, creepy as if it's different than scary. Like, they say, like, creepy is, like, quiet, like, I think, yeah, I think that there's a bit of difference. And it's scary is, like, leather face. Yeah. I like the leather face character a lot. I think he's, he's very unique from other killers because he's not really, he's not driven by, like, his own will, really. He's being manipulated by his family. His family uses him to kill people and then they eat him.

Like, that's what they do. And Lutterface is like mentally disabled or like he's like, you know, he's a disabled person. Like he doesn't even probably realize what he's doing. And he's a very like just a very unique look, very unique character. Very memorable. Like, changes his costume depending on what he's doing, which has like weird. Yeah, he keeps changing like his face. Yeah.

In some of the movies he has like two different hairs on like takes people hair off and like puts it on his head. Like it's really fucked up stuff like But it you know It's a very memorable interesting character For sure Like he's one of the best slashes All the entire family is just great characters The cook

The dude at the beginning The old guy in the chair Like they're so memorable And their performances are so great That like just having that dinner table scene With all of them together It's just you know It's a horror movie

But that entire sequence is just acting Right How many horror movies do you get where you can be terrified and engaged just by acting? And that's it. Right? That's all that's happening. Yeah. It's dialogue.

It's like 12 angry men almost, like trapped in that room. You're right. Yeah. You know, so many horror movies that exist are just like, it's not about the acting. It's about fucking stupid jump scares and characters being stupid and that's it. Right? Like the kills or dumb jokes. Oh, no.

Gore. This movie just doesn't have that. It's still funny. It's still entertaining. It's just not conventional. It does everything in its own unique way, even from the look of the movie. There's no single Adam Wingard horror movie where I could say the same. There's no Mike Flanagan horror movie where I could say the same.

I know people like those people, but, you know, I think there's a clear difference in terms of what, I guess, what I'm willing to sit through. I don't know. How do you feel about the characters? Like, we talk about Franklin in general. Franklin's great. I found the most annoying person to be who we are left with the longest, which I found funny. But it's also kind of a praise to the film that I was still able to feel like kind of scared for her and sympathetic, empathetic to what she's going through and not just be like, high, you know, like, hi, wish she would die sort of thing. Even, you know, she was like super annoying.

Just because of the situation, how it's presented. Yeah, exactly. Mostly how it's presented. to bring it back to another point that you were mentioning earlier, you really do feel, like, if you were to take a, I've seen that ending shot of the film before, and that's always stuck out to me as just like, wow, she does look like she's been through an entire ordeal.

And I'm glad to say that, you know, despite how long the third act of this film is, there is not only a progression in, I guess you could say her makeup and her performance, just like looking at her. But it's also like it's you can tell that she's going through hell pretty quickly into it also. That's such a consistent thing throughout the film that helps the believability so much. And when I watched the 2003 remake, like Jessica Beale looks like she just got on set and they

spritz her with like a spray bottle. Yeah, and I'm like all made off. No, yeah, exactly. She has like these really nice jeans on. Like yeah, she looks great like in every shot. Yeah, I'm glad I rewatched that remake because it's like. It really, there was a moment while I was watching that remake, what I noticed that? And it clicked for me.

I'm like, yeah, you know what? Like, she looked, in the original film, she reminded me of like fucking Shelly Duval in The Shining. Hopefully she didn't go through as much trauma. But, you know, like it's like, wow, you look like you're actually going through this. Yeah, sure. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. It's missing in the others.

Mm-hmm. Absolutely. Yeah. When you compare it to that remake, like, every choice is so bland in that one. And this one, yeah, it's just every choice in the, 1974 one stands out. It's very bold. Yeah.

And it works. I think it works. It's pretty clever how they've, they structured the film because when you have that very obviously crazy guy at the beginning, the hitchhiker doing that whole thing, your attention is so focused on him in terms of like, okay, that's like the killer. That's like the enemy, right? That when they pull up to the barbecue place, you kind of, let your guard down a bit. Like in my head, I was thinking, like, I'm pretty sure I remember how

the story goes. So they're, like, in on it or something. But I was also thinking, like, they don't seem too threatening. Whereas in another horror movie, if we didn't, if this was like the first location they got to and there wasn't a really obvious, really loud, you know, threat before that point, then I might be thinking, oh, these guys are the killers. You know, you might be a bit more defensive knowing that you're in a horror movie and that you're meeting new characters, you know, in the middle of nowhere. But, but, you know, you might be a bit more defensive, but because there was that earlier very overt threat, then it helps to trick the audience in a way.

Yeah, there's so much in the movie like that, like that whole thing. Like, who was that guy? There's so much mystery. There's so much you don't know. And that makes it scary too. There's so much about this family that you don't know. That's what makes it scary, yeah. Yeah, the implied like rituals and stuff they have in their house.

It's just so fucked up and confusing and scary. Yeah, when they, when they got the grandpa with the hammer hit her that part was pretty funny yeah yeah it was still terrifying there's always an element of comedy there's always an element of comedy there's always kind of goofy yeah but it just feels when you're in it it's not like it feels real when you're in it it i don't know it's just the look of it and music and everything like we said yeah yeah there there is a lot of campiness to this film yeah but it's really effective where it matters much so that I you know the campiness is like really easy to overlook because you know despite it

so many other horror films that you could not describe as campy don't do anything nearly as impressive as a lot of the scenes in this film yeah it's just yeah the tone just works the hillbilly part of it makes it like I like the comedic tone I think it needs that because then it's just kind of dull yeah without that it's kind of chaotic in a way yeah I can see people People saying the movie's a mess, but it is entertaining, and especially when you watch the other ones. Do you guys have anything more to say about this one? Just I guess, yeah, the imagery of the first girl death, just her being stuck on the meat hook, like, holy shit. Yeah, that's like a really great imagery.

Her boyfriend, too, her boyfriend, that was a fucked up scene. And then he closes the door. And like, that was a great edit, I thought. Yeah. Slatming that. And I just, I just want to mention, like, the video. visual style of this film. Like, there are some really well-thought-out shots in terms of how things are revealed.

Like, we already saw the blood on the van, but I love that it was on that spot of the door where it was covering it. And then because the door closes, then it kind of reveals it again. So the characters see it. And it's like, oh, there's, you know, they wouldn't have seen it coming out sort of thing. Like, I like, I like that reveal. There's a lot of nice, like, I'm surprised that there were even, like, smooth camera movements in this film at all. I was expecting something like fucking Sam Ramey's first

proof of concept within the woods sort of thing, you know? I was expecting something like that level of filmmaking. Yeah, there's great shots in this, yeah. It's like lots of good dolly moves, even though it has that beat millimeter camera or whatever. Really low quality camera.

My biggest criticism would probably just be some of the editing choices got a little annoying at some parts. There was one there was like scream, scream, scream. And each one like kind of cut it self off and then eyeball Polaroid noise scream it's like

nah man you don't need to it's already so loud and chaotic like I don't know but otherwise I really enjoyed the film and that's all I have to say about it and I would love to hear you talk about the sequels and I would love to talk about the fucking two thousand three one with you yeah the remake yeah yeah

because I don't know if I have any interest to see any of the other movies in this franchise because I don't know I want to keep this pure because this one's just so good to me um Not a bad choice. My rating's gone up in my head at each time I've seen it.

Yeah, no, I'm curious to hear especially about the sequel, the direct sequel that the same director did, but if we're rounding off like our scores for the original, I think I've settled on a four star for this. I really, really do rate it a lot and especially just how it's

cascaded through horror. I didn't even know Ridley Scott apparently was inspired seeing this the year prior to make an alien and that had a huge influence on that. So it's in like so much, like, just creatively, it's so responsible for such a great string of, like, movies following it. Yeah.

It's very original and creative. I really wrote it. I would give it five stars. I think it's, like you said, it's one of the most influential and important horror movies ever made. And it's really scary. It really works. It's one of those few movies that actually gets to you and you remember.

Just that sound like he said the camera of flash sound like I remember that I remember him I remember imagery from it just thinking about it right now That's a you know that's a sign of a great memorable movie yeah Now I'm giving this one a seven out of ten and it might get higher when I see it another time This was my first experience so thank you for recommending it Ralph Of course the rest of them fucking suck or they're okay Yeah please please the second one the second one's actually okay I like the second one It starts Dennis Hooper or Hopper?

Which is funny. We were talking about Mario Brothers earlier. He's the bad guy in that. He's Gumber. King, whatever the fuck. But he's in this, in the text change so on Massacre 2, he's like a detective or a cop or something. Dennis Hopper. He's hunting down Leatherface in this one.

And then like the other side plot is like this, I guess this girl at like a radio station is like reporting on Leatherface and Leatherface like kidnaps her and brings her brings him to his layer or whatever. it's a very it's much more goofy than the first one like it's clearly it's like Evil Dead too I think that's a good way to describe it like it's much more of the top it's trying to be funny like Dennis Hopper is really funny like it's trying to go for that tone the whole end of the the movie like Dennis Hopper fighting fucking like the poster on IMDB I'm like what is this yeah yeah I've always been confused when when I first saw it I was very confused by it I actually didn't like it but I get the goofiness of it now I like it I like the comedy.

It's an okay movie. I'd actually recommend it the second one. Okay. It's just, it's like Evil did too. It's not as good as the first Texas chainsaw or whatever. The third one is like when it gets really bad. Those are more interesting.

That one stars Vigo Mortensen. Ooh. If you guys know Vigo Mortensen. Yes, I do. What's that? Mr. Fantastic. The third one. Oh, yeah, they all have like a bad subtitle.

Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3. So in the series. To the Texas chainsaw, chainsaw is one word. Yeah, yeah. So weird that he's third one said they changed it. The third one's called Leatherface, Texas Chainsaw Mass Script 3. Oh, yeah. And then the fourth one has like a few different titles.

When it started, it said like the return of Texas Chainsaw. There's so many remakes and there's a leather face in 2017 that I forgot about and didn't, don't think I watched. But I just forgot that that existed. Jesus, there's so many. But like the third one's called Leatherface too. They're both called leather face. Texas chain saw three leather face. That one's just pretty shitty.

Bigot Mourinsons, like this guy, he works at a gas station. And so teenagers come to the gas station. They fill up their pump or whatever. It's like a boyfriend and a girlfriend, I think. They're really boring fucking characters, like completely dull, like uninteresting. And then like, I guess from there, Vigo Mornstein gets like a shootout with some other guy who works at the gas station and they flee. And, you know, from there, they run into the wall.

woods, they meet this other guy. And it's just really fucking bad. Like, it's the same thing as the first one. You know, they get chased. They try to replicate the scene where the boyfriend, the girlfriend, go on the house. They get killed. You know, it's not as effective. The, you know, there's the whole ending scene where she runs away.

And she runs into an RV this time. And there's all this, like, really bad ADR. Like, uh, like this guy driving the car, like Mr. Jenkins, I think his name is or whatever. This is like this woman. Mr. Jenkins for it. A leather face is chasing. after us. It's like really bad that you are. It's like fucking terrible. Like compared to the first

one where that sound was just so visceral and excellent. I guess that's all I guess say about the third one. It's just fucking sucks. Cool. Really boring characters. The fourth one's like that's the one to talk about. The next generation. Have you guys? Yeah. Have you guys heard of the next generation? Have you heard of it at least like it's considered the worst? I've seen the cover of it maybe or something. I don't know. I've known it existed but it's got really low ratings. Incredibly low ratings. René Zalweigar. Yeah.

Matthew McConaughey. Yeah. It has a series. Even though it's like the campiest shittiest series, it's like, they got two Oscar winners in it. They got Matthew McConae. They got Vigo Mortensen like in it. And you know, they're good.

Like Matthew Connie in this movie, he's really over the top. He has this fucking like mechanical leg. Fuck the other one. You've got to watch. It's like this mechanical leg in it. I watched the director's great. 3.3 out of 10 user rating. This sounds hot.

Awesome. With Matthew McConaughey in it too and Renee Zelliger. Okay, this is got to be. René Zell Wicker's like it starts so like it's like a completely different movie at the beginning. It's like a prom movie. These teenage draft from and they run all. I don't know why they leave, but they leave then they go in the woods and they get stuck. I don't I forgot how and then like they get picked up by Matthew McConaughey. They get brought to the house and like Matthew McConae just tortures, especially Renee Zell Wager. He's just torches her like making fun over whatever. And it's just too. It's just. It's just. It's just. It's just. It's just. It's just. It's, it's, it's, is so, it's so funny like how Matthew Kahnahe acts in this movie, like, there's a part, she's like pointing a gun at him, because she, she's like escaping. And Bethlehem Kennedy like takes the gun, fucking like shoved in his own mouth. He's like aw! I'm laughing that's so

funny. Yeah, this is going to be a movie for me. Yeah, there's just so many scenes that were like, what the fuck am I even watching? Like, Nathan Kahnian in it. This is like a scene he jumps onto a car and it's like this goofy, oh, he does. It's like a meme. Can't wait. It's like this

noisy mix. This sounds so wacky. The fourth one is hysterical. It's so yeah. It's not good. Like I wouldn't rate it highly. It's like a one star if you had to rate it. The perfect film. Yeah. Should I read the other ones too?

Shit. Like the second one's like a three star. The third one's like a two, one star. Maybe one star. Yeah. The fourth one's a one star. So the third and the fourth are equal in quality? Well, I guess technically, but like I find the fourth one funnier because it's just because Matthew McConaughey. I like Vigal once and like he's okay in the movie, but he's not as campy as like Matthew McConaughey in the fourth one.

He goes all out. I think McConaughey actually said it's one of his weakest performances. Great. I guess it's fair, but you know, he's like he's like a Dallas Spires Club and like true detective like real acting roles. And just to see him in this like fucking acting like an idiot. Like he's beating the he's beating up women. Like he's yelling like a madman. Like, it's so bizarre to see him in that bowl.

Yeah, the poster is even like, campy schlock. Like, you could totally tell. Yeah. I would recommend that one. Yeah. So let's go to remake. Yeah, that's the next in the time. Right?

Yeah. So here's my, here's why I decided to rewatch the 2003 film is because I was, I guess, 13 when I would have watched it because that would have been the home video release. And I watched it by myself at my, like, Granny's place. And it's scared. me and I remember being scared by it. And it was like in the daytime too.

But I remember I was like looking at the window to my right and like, oh, you should I'm going to come out of the window. So, you know, it was like a scary experience for me. And what I love about having rewatched it is that I'm able to pinpoint filmmaking qualities that I was not aware of what I was 13 that really stick out to me now. Like I mentioned earlier, the soundtrack, just being shit. Because that did not influence me at all when I was 13. I was just able to be like, oh, yeah, just watching the movie sort of thing.

Another thing that really stands out to me now, there's so many fucking cuts in this movie. There's a cut every like two seconds. And like, it's just so weird. Yeah, the cinematographers, too, is terrible. And it's so embarrassing because you can tell that they're trying to recreate certain sequences from the original film. But it's just like, it feels like a trailer. Also, Michael Bay produced this. I don't know if everybody would have it's one of those Michael Bay produced

he produces a lot of those like slasher remakes like Friday 13th night around Elm Street that's like that's maybe the worst one nightmare on Elm Street the remake I didn't even watch it fucking Robert England is still alive okay fuck you he can replace in him yeah I like Jack girl Haley too but I mean Jesus Christ what a stupid decision yeah this must have been that era where these remakes actually weren't popular like they were trying to get them off the ground like they're so bad yeah they try to make believable. The attempt is to make it more realistic by

I guess making it all the cinematography brown and by just making the characters really bland and like just having all this handheld camera shit and like quick cutting and it fucking sucks. It just looks bland and it looks like an early 2000s like shitty horror movie. And then it's got good actors in it

but they're not really given anything. Like Lee Irmy he's like he's the guy in the full model jacket the drill sergeant like he's an excellent actor and this he's like you know he's okay Hey, he doesn't, he's not given much. And Jessica Beal is too pretty. Like, she doesn't look beat up, like you said. Like, she's getting fucking chased by a guy with a chainsaw.

She should be, like, dirtied and like, and there's just so many, like, conventional horror movie fucking things. Like, she hotwires a car. Like, how does this woman know how to hotwire? Like, what? It happens twice. It just doesn't make sense. Like, when you grow up in Baltimore?

Like, with no tools. Just with her fingers. It doesn't make any sense. It's just like shitty writing. And, like, it's just about having. those horror movie moments with the jump scares and the scene like, oh, is she going to start the car before Lee Army gets to her? And it's just that. It's very bland. And it's not what the first one was. And I don't even think it wants to be. It just wants to make money. And it did. It very much did. It was like $100 million, yeah, $107 million at the box office on a $9.5 million budget.

So, bank. Cheapest shit. Yeah, they made a prequel after it. How's the runtime compared to the original? because you didn't really mention that. It's really short, the original. Yeah, the short is. Which is nice.

It's like an hour of 20. Yeah. This one's like 15 minutes. Longer. Mm-hmm. Doesn't need to be. Yeah. There's a lot of weird decisions.

Like, the ending's not as memorable. Like, we talked about the ending of the first one. It's like very memorable scene. This one's like, whatever. So like when I was saying earlier with the original film, how there's a very clear and obvious threat from the crazy guy and then he runs away.

and then your guard is let down from the other characters you meet at the gas station or the shop or whatever. That does not happen in this film because instead of the crazy guy, they get just a girl wandering the streets. And it's obvious that she escaped from the thing, right? And so it's like, oh, this is a victim. So now your attention is drawn outwardly instead of focused on just one thing. It's like, oh, well, who else is the villain here? And also, so she gets in the back of their car and she's like, drug, or tired or something and

she's like, oh, don't take me back there you're going the wrong way, just like really quietly they're like, what's wrong? And she pulls a revolver out of her pussy. I'm not kidding. Well, from between her legs. Maybe it wasn't all the way back there. I don't know, but it is kind of funny.

From between her legs. And she immediately just blows her fucking brains out in the back of their car. And now the plot is, well, we got a dead girl in the back of the car, like Pulp Fiction except trying to be. more serious. And so they're trying to figure out like, oh, but we were trying to smuggle weed. So now we got to get rid of the pinata fold of weed because now we got involved in the cops about the dead body.

And so they find the sheriff who's played by the guy from Noep, full metal jacket, the sergeant. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Lehorne. Yeah, and he's pretty funny in the movie. But yeah. And then they, yeah, there's a lot of, there's a lot of parts where it's like they're trying to. Yeah, and he's trying. to recreate moments or sequences and I'm just like, damn, you really don't understand why that works so well. Like the sliding metal door part, it's such a close shot that it really doesn't have the same impact as it did in the 70s film. Because in the 70s film, you have a wide enough shot where you're able to see the door in the center of the frame

and the house, the rest of the interior of the house around it. So that when the metal part of the door comes out, you're like, holy shit, that doesn't belong there. There's like a dungeon or something in there. But when it happens in the 2003 film, it's just like such a close shot that all you see is this metal door. And it really loses the impact. Really loses the impact so much. For sure.

It's like they didn't want to have an impact. It's like they wanted to make the most... I think they just didn't understand. Maybe they didn't want to scare people too much, but that's the point. Yeah, don't take it too far. Yeah. They're like, no, we can't be too much. I mean, and that goes along with just like those early 2000s.

They were so tame those movies. And, you know, horror movies in the 70s and 80s were much more visceral. And those filmmakers just did whatever they wanted. They made really scary stuff in that way. There's different trends that happen. You know, early 2000s is when the saw torture porn stuff was going on. Like 2004, like the next year, that was the big trend. So it really depends.

But I don't know. For a film like this, it's just like, man, it becomes so apparent, like, The more cuts there are in the film, the less of a vision you have to have. Because you can always just figure it out in post and somebody else is going to, you know? Just like... Yeah, sure. It's so much less... Not in all cases.

In this case. Yeah, not in all case. Yeah, not in all case. And this didn't feel purposeful. Yeah, exactly. Oh, my God. That's the perfect way to describe it. It's not purposeful.

It's just a remake. It's just a bland remake. Hearing you guys describe this movie actually reminded me that I have seen it, actually. Like, I've seen it. It's just really boring and generic. I just forgot I'd seen it. Oh, that's great. One of those.

Intro and stuff. I have definitely seen it, yeah. Maybe even multiple times. But yeah, not good. I want to, uh, I want to play a sound effect for you. There's a lot of these in the film. A sound effect. That was just from my phone.

And I found that by searching Hell's Kitchen sound effect. And because I've seen so much of it, Gordon Ramsey shit now, like watching the film now when it was done unironically. I'm like, oh my God, Hell's Kitchen. So like every fucking five minutes, I was like, holy shit, this is so funny. It's like ruined it unintentional because it used to be like a serious kind of sound effect. Yeah. But now it's just like you can't do it unironically anymore. Oh, that's amazing.

Because reality television has just fucking ruined it. We've walked it. It's not like a great sound effect in the first place, but it's just so funny that I was just thinking of hell's kitchen the entire time. Oh my God. The outdoor lighting scenes in this film. The outdoor scenes lighting. It was so weird The moon is very bright

Well No there's like There's like two or three different situations where they're outside And I'm like this looks so weirdly off And it was in a different way like Okay clearly this is Really bright middle of the day shit

And you're pretending Like there's some overcast in post And you're like dimming it down But you can like there's something really off About like the shadows and how the lights hitting the characters And the color And it's just like it's just like It's so weird.

It's so bizarre that they just like, fuck, I don't know, laziness or just unlucky with the weather. They did day for night, day for night, which is usually what they do in like cheap big foot shows, but not in a feature film. 9.5 million dollar budget, I guess. Yeah, it's cheapest shit tonight. Unless that went to the actor. The majority of it. Yeah. Jessica Beale, Lee, Lee, Army.

Yeah. So in the original 70s film, and I guess tell me whether or not this happened. in any of the sequels Ralph. But if I remember correctly in the 70s film, they never showed Leatherface's real face, right? No. No. Did that happen in any of the sequels?

Because that happens in this 2003 movie. I don't think so. Wow. I don't think so. Yeah, they did this really stupid reveal where it was like, look, he's deformed in missing a nose. Like, I don't know. You're kind of ruining the mystique, though.

Yeah. Uh-huh. Exactly. It ruins the mystery. Yeah. That's part of the horror. The more movies you make about something inherently, it gets less scary because you learn more about it.

Yeah. doing a real origin story. Like, we know leather face now. We've seen them a million times. Yeah. I never actually watched the prequel that they made. Texas Chainsaw Massacre at the beginning. I wonder how shitty that is.

Oh, yeah, the beginning. Yeah, probably really bad. I think I have seen that. Oh, yeah? Who directed it? It was another produced by Michael Bay one, but I think it's a different director. Let's see.

Yeah, I think I have seen it. I didn't rewatch it for this. Yeah, different director. Jonathan Lieb... It has a lot of the same cast. He directed Darkness Falls in 2003. I watched that horror movie. He directed Rings, the sequel to The Ring, but was bad.

Wow. Battle Los Angeles. Halo TV show. Oh, great. Do a little. Uncredited director of reshoots, apparently. Oh, did he do Wrath the Titans? I feel like I remember that.

Yeah. Yeah. That's right. Yeah. Right. Apparently, Rings is listed as a short film. Oh, okay, never mind. It was on the extra disc with a re-release of the ring on the DVD.

So it wasn't the Ring 2. Yeah, where was I? I was talking about dumb shit. The lighting was so weird. It's just so much of this film is just like they made it in post, but not in a good way. You know? Yeah. Oh, God, yeah, I remember.

It's a very studio movie. Fucking. That's like, you know, the whole movie, the whole point of the original movie is that it isn't that like it's so against the grain yeah you're right you know just to see a complete remake of it that's completely bland yeah i want to see something that's like sanitized when you think texas chains it's very sanitized yeah raw raw mate uh there's a really really funny shot where leather face is wearing uh jessica beale's character's boyfriend's face and it's like see kind of cg and bad

And it's just a really funny reveal. It's like, why? There's also a part, when they're in the car at the beginning, they change a lot of the dialogue and make it just so much more trashy. Like, it's all about drugs at the beginning. They're not having like any interesting conversations. There's just like weed, Mexico partying. And then Jessica Beal, like, I thought you were, like, you know,

maybe you could put a ring on my finger because I were boyfriend-girlfriend character as he's like, yeah, as if. And then later when the boyfriend character gets killed, uh, leather face is like digging through his pockets and finds a, like, wedding engagement ring it's just like why do we need that like we need the oh he was going to marry her for real like yeah why does that matter this character that died you're supposed to care about it yeah and she never finds it i thought for sure when she was like in the basement she was going to find the ring so it really leads nowhere it's just for the audience and it doesn't matter fuck oh yeah the uh so they have

the one other friend up on the meat hook or whatever uh his legs cut off and just Jessica Beal, he's like over top of a piano and she's like, oh, I need to help get you down from there. And she can't because she's weak or something. And then he's just, she grabs a knife and he's like, do it. And that's all they say, that's the only communication that they have. It's just do it, just implied like, oh, I guess Jessica Beale should put him out of his misery. She stabs him in the gut once and then he immediately dies. It's like, that's the worst place to stand.

That's like a slow and painful death. Agonizingly painful death that you're just going to put it through. But the movie pretends otherwise. Like, fuck, cut it. I don't know. Like, maybe just cut him in the arm and have him bleed out if he can't reach his, like, throat or his heart. Just shoot him in the head.

Yeah, that was really funny. And the music during that scene, too, it was like so clearly trying to enforce this, like, this is so sad. This is so sad that she's killing him right now. It's like, oh, my God. Fuck. So much wrong with his movie. But it was very funny, and I'm glad I watched it.

It was like one of those really like, oh, this is trash and I'm enjoying it because it's so bad. They're all trash. I think you're really like the fourth one. I'm excited. That's really trashy and funny. Yeah. That's what you're looking for more so than this. Like this is kind of bland, I thought.

I didn't hate the movie. I don't hate it as much as the nightmare on Elm Street remake or like the Friday the 13th one. This is not, yeah, it's really not good. It's bland. Brown. Yeah. It's like every Michael Bay remake. It's brown, whatever, like bland.

Like, everything's brown. Everything's yellow. Like, it just doesn't look interesting. It's just ugly. What'd you think about that one shot that went through the girl's head? That was a pretty cool. That was cool. Yeah.

It's like the one shot in the movie that doesn't look awful. Would you mean it goes through her head? Yeah. So the girl blows her brains out and the camera shows the characters in the car reacting. And it goes back. It dollies back through the head wound. and then the head like tilts back as it keeps going out through the car and it's like oh there's that involved some planning that involved some coordination there yeah it's kind of cool yeah

that was like the money shot yeah and then the rest of the movie looks like shit and it's just too many guys you'd think for a movie that like actively understands that they're putting effort into a specific shot where the entire appeal of the shot is that it's one unbroken shot you'd think that the same people making that shot would understand how shitty that the movie looks when there's a cut every few seconds for the rest of it, right? You'd have to have an understanding of how shitty that is in order to think that that shot looks cool. Right? Yeah, the editor is in charge of that shit.

Yeah, I guess. The film crew has no control over that stuff. They don't know. They don't know how it's going to turn out. Yeah, it sucks. It's very bland editing. Oh, you know what also really fucking suck. So every time that Leatherface is destroying something with a chainsaw in the 1970s film, correct me.

if I'm wrong, but they're just actually cutting something open with a chainsaw. That door, just fucking, like making that X symbol and then like tearing it apart. There's so many parts in this film where they have the same concept of like, okay, there's a door behind it his leather face is going to get through it with a chainsaw where it's just like they just rigged a fucking thing to explode. Like he didn't cut through it with a chainsaw.

He like poked it and then some foam that looked like a door just exploded in one hit. Like you could poke it and just boom, right? just like, damn, that doesn't feel real. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I never would have noticed that when I was 13. I never would have noticed how fucking stupid it was that, like, leatherface teleports in front of the guy in the, in the, uh, the sheets scene where he's being chased through the laundry or whatever.

Yeah, that doesn't make sense either. Yeah, when I was younger, I was like, that actually scared me because I guess part, I remember the thought process of like, yeah, it's scary that he could teleport court in front of me. But now as an adult, I'm like, well, if I'm, this isn't a supernatural film. So you're kind of ruining the believability. There has to be some. Leatherface isn't a ghost. Yeah. It's just a guy. It's like a disabled guy. When I was 13, it scared me. Yeah. Yeah. So much bullshit. Yeah, they don't, they don't make leather face. Leatherface isn't right in this. He's too, uh, he's too mean. He's too, like, too much like Michael Myers or someone like that. Like, he's,

yeah. He's the sad character. Like, he's just, he's used. by like other people and he's just you know there's nothing he could do he's just he's got the guy he's got the chainsaw whatever there was some just a prank bro jump scares

those are always fun oh my favorite or one of the characters is just an asshole yeah whoa my arm like who does that stop

stop hanging out with him yeah it's just the shitty horror movie yeah very bland but it was Very funny. I would recommend it. It's really funny.

I'm glad you found it funny. Yeah. I was enjoying it. I like looking at Jessica Beal. She's very pretty. Yeah, I guess one last thing to mention. How do you feel about them clearly, like, injecting this Blair Witch shit at the beginning and end of the movie for no reason? Just like, oh, we're going to have a found footage of the cops that are, that checked out the crime scene.

And what's weird about that is in the opening, they say, like, 30 years ago, right? but then the entire movie plays and it never once feels like a 70s period piece never once does it feel like this is in the 70s it feels like so weirdly modernistic and then at the end of the movie it's like clear because they do the close up shot of the male character

being dragged down the stairs he's like oh he left those scratch prints right like that's so clear and then at the end of the movie they're like investigating in the Blair Witch thing or whatever I'm like wow that whole thing was supposed to be in the 70s it never once felt like it it never once it felt like a 2000 and three characters and

feel movie the entire time. Like, holy shit, that's a bad job if you were trying to make a period piece. Damn. Three out of ten. It was a lot of fun. I enjoyed it. Yeah, I'd give it one star or one and a half.

I actually give it the same thing, one and a half. Perfect. Out of five. It's terrible, but it's, you know, it's just like a bland remake. I won't even say it's terrible. It's a bland remake. And to me, that's terrible.

But it was a bit nostalgic for me. It's other people. Of just shitty 2000, 2003 horror movie bland nonsense. First one's definitely better. If you want like a funny bad experience, I'd say watch the second one or watch the fourth one.

Like those are funny bad movies. This is kind of like eh. Yeah. Like you said, the film stuff at the end that was really thrown in. Yeah. They're trying way too hard. That's why I said they're trying too hard to make him scary.

Like leather face. Like they have the freeze frames on them. It's not, that's not the point. You know, this I felt bad for a letter face I thought

he's just a big baby yeah I like him as just a big baby because that's what he is yeah a big child but at the same time that's scary because when you direct

the child in a direction he's just like okay I'll fucking kill this woman I don't even know what I'm doing like that's scary that is scary you broke the door that was a good scene

yeah they like yell at him like they treat leather face like shit his family yeah it's so much interesting um So there's another one after Texas chainsaw, I think 3D. Yeah, which ones have you seen?

Alexander DeDario left here. Yeah. I think, yeah, Texas Chainsaw 3D. That's the next one. It's 2013. Well, the beginning is the 2006. Texas, the prequel to the Michael Bay. I don't know.

I don't remember anything about it. I didn't see it. And then, yeah, Texas Chainsaw 3D. It's just literally called Texas Chainsaw 3D, 2013. Which is a bad title. Did you watch it? Yeah, it's just shit. It's like a very bland horror movie.

Very cool. Yeah, they've got like, yeah, it's just bad. I don't even say it. You don't want to talk about it. Don't feel pressured. And then there's leather face. I don't know. In 2017.

Yeah, that one, that I didn't see. I heard that one was bad too. Yeah, I think one of the I'm curious. I'm ratings on that. Let's see. Really well. But, you know, I'm, I like, I like the tone. I just, I would watch more of these, the goofy tone.

I don't mind that. Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2021, apparently, produced by Fide Alvarez, who did fucking Evil Dead remake and what was that? Crocodile movie?

No, Alexander Aja did that. Never mind. Let's see what else Fide has done, if however I pronounce his name. He directed Don't Breathe, and the girl in the spider's web. Are you talking about Lake Placid when you said the crocodile movie?

No, I was talking about the newer one that Alexandra Aja made, where it was like Florida flooding. And like every character that died was somebody that literally just showed up just to die in that one scene. You should watch Luke Placin. It's like, it's like jaws except with a crocodile. Oh, I've seen it. Oh, yeah.

That would be very nostalgic for me, actually. It's just with a crocodile. If you ever want to recommend it. Yeah, yeah, totally. I could definitely watch that one. That's definitely on my alley to recommend. I remember the ending. I won't say it.

It's like five sequels too. Oh, shit. Yeah. So Fetti Alvarez is producing this new. Texas chainsaw massacre and the director David Blue Garcia has done nothing he's directed a movie called Teano which nobody watched

okay all right I guess there will be another Texas chainsaw massacre and I haven't seen any ads for it yeah that's weird I feel like it's being released this year I don't even know yeah it's weird I haven't heard anything about oh my god on IMDB it just says 2021 in parentheses internet. Maybe that's not accurate. Maybe.

It's a web show. No, usually they say that for the home video release now. Like iTunes and stuff. I'd say like the film, the series as a whole, it lacks consistency. It's not about like a continuing story or continuing characters. It's just about like, if you like that tone, just watch it. And each one is like completely different. Yeah, sure.

That too. But it's just, yeah, each one is completely different. And, you know, you see what you get. they'll have leather face in it that's for sure they also always have the old guy the old guys in everyone the you know he stands still um apparently then the new one is an alternate continuity to the original film so i guess a direct sequel to the 70s one oh yeah i feel like they did that pretty time pretending like the other sequels didn't happen basically that's what they did with Halloween that's what we need that's what we need cool

Thanks for letting me recommend that. Yeah, that was a real cool one. Thank you. Let's do some questions then from the Southerncast subreddit. There's a suggestion thread there where you can ask whatever question you'd like first to answer. C.C. Buddy R. Ryder is going to get us going. For Ralph slash Alex, who's your favorite Disney villain? For Adam, who's your second favorite Disney villain?

Oh, okay. Hmm. Scars pretty good. Disney specifically. Yeah. They're known for their kind of villains, aren't they? Like, for me, for me, Hades from Hercules stands out. That's one of the best.

You got it. He's fucking amazing as far as like an animated character design is concerned. Like when he gets angry, the blue flames turn red. He's so expressive, the voice acting and everything. And the design as well with the artist who did like the pinkfoils, the wall stuff. Oh, cool. Yeah. The art direction for that movie.

So it's got like a kind of weird tinge for a Disney movie. Yeah. A bit more creepy. Not gonna lie, checks a couple of the same boxes for me. What are those like the voice and the... Yeah, just like, I don't know, I like the kind of like, I guess they both got like yellow eyes. Just kind of like evil smile, kind of like sarcastic personality sort of thing. Yeah, suave.

I haven't seen the movie in a long time. The voice is not as good for me, obviously. Sure. I looked up a list of like Disney villains. They counted, like, there's some word once you won't count, like Sid from Toy Story. Like, that's a villain, I guess, technically. Yeah. Yeah, if you want to throw Pixar in there.

The fucking, what's the lizard from Monsters Inc? Oh, Randall. Randall's good. Randall's amazing. Sure. Sure. Okay. Does Marvel kind of Disney?

I like Loki. And I guess, I would say if you go on like Disney classic animated, like I would say Captain Hawk for me. I think that's my favorite. Yeah. Captain Hawks probably Ursula's very memorable Yeah

Little mermaid Yeah Just to mention a girl Yeah I know some people probably want me to say Cher Khan or something but nope Boy sounds too old Sorry

Ogie Boogie from That's a good villain Nightmare on All What is it? Yeah actually Eaggy Boog is a real good one I'm sorry I can't remember his name In The Incredibles was the like kid

The Alvin in the Chipmikes guy Syndrome Syndrome, that's his name, yeah Syndrome's great I think that's a cool villain Yeah, syndrome is good Yeah All right, I couldn't pick one

But you got a couple, so Darth Vader That's I mean, it wasn't a I don't Not back then I guess, yeah I guess it's a Disney

Kylo Ren's gonna stretch it Yeah Kyler Rand's okay It's definitely the best part of those new ones For sure Like not even a doubt Tyler Rand Darth Mall

Oh, yeah, his cool lightsaber and no character, aside from that. Count Duku? That's my choice. He had a cool lightsaber, too. It had like a little, it looked like a comma. You know, like, those lightsabers were straight. His was like, his was kind of slanted, like flaccid. Great, great writing, George Lucas.

I guess seeing as this will be coming out in October, we should have a horror-related one. M-night needs an Oscar left this saying, What's the best popcorn horror film? A movie that delivers on scares and tension, but doesn't necessarily push the envelope with filmmaking. Okay. See what flashes in my head is like the first saw. I think it's perfect for this kind of thing.

It's quick, snappy. It's before it turned into like gore porn. I actually actually gave a shit about scaring you a little bit, building up an atmosphere. Sure. Adam, you recommended Drag Me to Hell. I really like that. I think that's count that as one of those.

It's like not groundbreaking, but it's a good one of those. really entertaining great horror. Yeah, that's a really good one. Yeah. And, you know, not rated R, which is unconventional, too. You know, if I were to say popcorn horror, I might be pushing the genres a little bit,

but one cut of the dead is fucking awesome. There's my answer. And if you're going to watch it, anybody who's listening, do not search up anything about it. All you need to know is that it is a single take zombie film. where you're supposed to keep watching after the credits, and that's all I'm going to say.

Neither of you have watched that. Interesting. No, I will watch it. No, not yet. Noted. Yeah,

a lot of those great horror movies were, like, game changers, you know. Yeah, it's hard to pick one. Trying to focus more on the popcorn. Like,

silence and lambs, like, American Psycho, Alien, the thing, like, those are all, those all have,

even shot at dead. Like, that had a huge impact, I feel. Scream. like these are all great like I can't I can't name one that's like what about like it follows or something along those lines sure it follows fairly unique time you know don't breathe don't breathe is a yeah I feel like that's some memorable that's like what a conventional horror movie should be like it's

not great but it's it's like it hits all the check marks and it's entertaining right yeah there's some there's some memorable parts about it did you see they've like made a sequel like don't breathe too that came out like the other week or something yeah I didn't Watch it. Weird one to make a sequel to I read the premise. Oh yeah, I wanted to see that.

It's about the blind guy, like going to save a girl or something. Like weird premise. I don't know what it's like. Yeah, the bad guy's like the good guy in the second one. Yeah,

that's the spin. Yeah, that's like the spin. He has got to rescue someone. We're considering that what he gets up to in that first one. You know, the collector in the collection? I just thought of that.

Oh, yeah. Those are fun. Those are popcorn. Oh, yeah. This is like a bunch of like killing. This is like killing. Not that those existed.

Cuthies fuck. Those are really fun. Yeah. I remember Adam, you took a picture like your brother or something and he's got like the collector mascot or whatever. It looks like. Oh, I don't remember. I remember tweeting that idea.

That was really funny. I haven't thought about the collector in so many years, man. Oh, my God. Yeah. That was a good one. I like the collection and the collector. Those are very campy. Fuck.

Those are like high art, but they're funny. Cube? Cube is great. Holy shit. I love Cube. A lot of fun. You know, not like, uh, No, like, I don't know, the exorcist, but it's up there.

Canadian movie? It's like a good, it's a really good concept, and it's, it makes great use of like that one set. Like, the whole thing is just sending that one fucking set. And it's like, it's how they use the lighting and how they use the actors and the characters really. That makes it work. Like, that's a great horror movie for sure. Yeah, awesome. They make great use of those limitations.

Yeah. Next question? proud asparagus 1934 has a sad one for me do you guys think Ralph's going to win the bet Sony and Andy Circus have been saying it will happen for a while now and Tom Hardy is wearing a far from home hat

in a photo so he could be in that film we'll cross that bridge when we come to it guys hold money I think someone okay if you want to see a conclusion of this bet just you find that original clip of the exact words we used and just hang on to it and then when it happens of like, fucking, from like two years ago.

Right? Yeah, it's ages again now. Yeah, we have to, I, I, I don't care about it, so I keep forgetting what the specifics of the bed are. So if you listening, I think I'm screwed here. I want to just hang on to that clip for a while, then, sure. Can someone just find it for me? One of our fucking, like, how many listeners we have?

We have at least three listeners. I think someone did that array. I didn't even watch it. In my mind, it sits as me saying that Venom, Tom Hardy Venom will never be in the MCU and if he's in this new Spider-Man then I'm wrong and I'd lose the vet Yeah I know like when I watch like

Listen to Spill or whatever Like back in the day or whatever I memorized everything Like I know every fucking episode For sure Yeah yeah So if one of our listeners can't fucking go back to that clip Then you know maybe we should just end this podcast

I'll find it Yeah I'm not feeling good about it I think I'm screwed this time I could find like the exact clip of like Corey's saying something like it's spill. Yeah, yeah. I memorized everything.

Dung porn alt has an interesting one. Interesting name. Yeah. Of all the top movie lists, sound and sight, AFI's top 100, 100, 100, 100, 100, 100,0001 movies you must see before you die, IMDB slash letterbox, top lists,

etc. Which one do you think is most accurate on listening, sorry, on listing, what should be considered the best movies of all time? Fuck, do you have any of these open? What are these again? I actually have the 1001 movies, like, book. Yeah, yeah.

There's a new one coming out with, like, Brad Pitt on the cover. It's Cliff Booth. Yeah. I ordered it. I'd say that one's, like, pretty damn good, to be honest. It's pretty extensive. I mean, it would have to cover a lot if there's 1,000. Yeah, true.

That's a lot. A lot of the recommended movies on Solonica's that often are in that book, too. And I used to would have, like, point at the IMDB. list like once upon a time a few decades ago while a decade ago it was okay as a good like sort of starting point to jump in some of the biggest more important movies you might know but we mention it again and again it's getting more and more diluted as more new movies come out and the scores all kind of fuck it up and the ratings of everything but yeah let the box I suppose is a bit more consistent for that stuff there's still a lot of movies I would need to see before I would ever feel

confident about making that kind of list. There's still a lot of letterbox movies that have weird ratings yeah for sure what did you guys do when you're first like trying to find what you wanted to see you know because it's like a lot of people mentioned earlier I think like I had a Microsoft Word document

on my computer in like 2006 that I would just add things to but I didn't take I didn't get like a whole like list from someone else and add everything to it it was just slowly you know someone would recommend something and I'd add it to it or I'd see a trailer or a poster.

A lot of what I wound up watching when I was younger was literally just from me walking through a video store, looking at titles and then just writing down some of the DVD covers like, oh, that looks interesting. A lot of movies that I really enjoyed I found through that. And then obviously as the internet grew and it became more commonplace and IMDB and, you know, all that shit, it became a lot easier for me to find things, you know, Criterion released Housoo. And I looked at the poster on the Criterion website.

I was like, that looks fucking cool. And I watched it and one of my favorite movies, you know. so right right yeah these uh these top movie lists are just playing with fire that like like when empire puts them out whatever uh half feels like it's just just to annoy people a lot of the time do tell you know it's just like really like what are you going to put in the top 100 if it's only a hundred like a thousand yeah you have a lot more room but a hundred like you're going to be leaving stuff out that's just going to annoy people and that's just always what it turns into just people walking them and pulling them apart yeah that the book i

God, it's 500. It says a little more. A little more. Yeah. When you only include 100 and then you include some that are just like kind of shit, remember that best actors list that we went over? And it was like, who was in that?

It was like Keanu Reeves and there was a couple other like really, I think Denzel Washington was like the number one of all time. Yeah, it was Minnesota McCarthy too. The Desil Washington's a good actor. I like Keanu Reeves. He's not a great actor, though. Keanu Reeves in the top. McDormit, Daniel DeLois,

Morland Brando. I think it was even like top 50 actors of all time. I think it was something stupid like that. I'd say Daniel DeLois by far is number one. And like Merrill Streep is up there. Like all these fucking people that are like Keanu Reeves, Tom Cruise, really? Yeah, I don't know. Because like if I'm looking at especially a top 100 list,

I'm scrolling through this one on Empire right now. Avengers Assemble is on it. Interesting. But other than it's just, I'm looking at all these. I'm like, these are all just the ones that are on everyone's list. If somebody, if a publication makes a, top 100 movies.

These are just the same movies from the, like, I don't see anything unique about this. So what's the point? I guess the point is for people who don't know the top 250 on IMDB exists or something. Like, I don't know. Interstellar, that's a weird one. Well, there's some, like, variety. Interstellar, that's a good one. Like, that's an interesting choice.

I think that's really interesting because it's more recent, you know? Yeah. I love that movie. I think it's great. To put in just, I don't know, 100. But you're right. It's usually like, it's usually the godfather, like Citizen Kane, Pulp Fiction. Yeah, like I can read them all out.

These are just really obvious. Taxi drivers, Seven, the Big Loboski, Casablanca, the Good, Bad and the Ugly, Heat, Terminator 2, Matrix. Like, these are all those. Yeah, those are great. You should see these movies, for sure. Those are the classics, right? But like, what else is there, right? Like, I'm looking for some a little more now.

Yeah, just count Lord of the Rings as one movie. Jesus. Uh-huh. They're taking up three spots on this list. you have the Dark Knight trilogy on this list yeah Dark Night for sure Raiders Goodfellas Pulp Fiction Shawshank Dark Knight Empire

Godfather Yeah Shawshank Way to win I'd say Godfather's the best And then Goodfellas and Pulp Fiction But like everyone has that But you know those are also You know those are great movies

Like you can't really argue Yeah I don't have a lot of issues With that empire list It's just the list that people do if there was something on there like I don't know like Pixar's inside out would trigger me a little or something I'm just trying to think of when

where like I don't know precious or precious yeah that's a little pretentious but you know I feel like the most part's fine it's like whatever they you know whatever whatever no strong feelings

yeah I don't really have any strong feelings about it I just there should be a more you like unique less like top hundred action movies maybe top hundred horror movies so you get more variety and like yeah what the quality and like genres are very different like Texas chainsaw if those same qualities were in like a drama it might not work as much

but in a horror film it really works yeah it's just like you know very different it's like um the Oscars or whatever when they just like nominate best movie whatever even though the Golden Globes got a fucking ton of criticism ton of criticism I fucking hate the Golden Globes so like at least they go do like comedy and drama like at least they acknowledge it

different. I feel like I would be pretty confident making like a list of like top X movies you might not have heard of from the year like 2010 to 2021. Yeah. You know, and I'll keep inching back to like, I don't know, like yeah, 2007 to 2021. Any year that I've done a list video that I'm like pretty confident about finding some some real true hidden gems sort of things. Some gems. And I feel like a list like that might actually be useful to some people, I don't know. Yeah, for sure. I guess it's just opinion. Okay.

Al Pesinas says, have you ever lost a friend because of a movie? Either because you laughed at a movie they found serious or endearing, or being insulted by the fact that they enjoyed a certain piece of media and vice versa. I had a friend who talked during a movie. I didn't see them anymore after that. Like one of those like constantly talk, like. Yeah, he was just like,

Shadow jokes like I don't know like the aliens were bleeding so it was like jizz or something like oh what is that jiz like dumb shit like oh it's so annoying read the room yeah yeah read the room yeah it's like a movie theater

yeah there I was in I was kind of dating a person and they showed me writing the bus with my sister and they were like really seriously emotionally into it and I was like trying my goddamn hardest but it was so fucking awful

and I was just like I can't It's pretty hilarious It's like so funny though Rosie O'Donald I mean if anybody's curious I made a review on it a while back Yeah I saw the bus with my sister She is not a convincing

Not a convincing like disabled person for sure It's such a funny movie It's mostly boring actually It's just to see someone not act well Just to see like the acting I mean Like from Rosie O'Donnell Like she's clearly not disabled

but she's like, oh yeah, the way she talks is just so insane. That's not good acting. That's actually kind of offensive. Like, why you, blah,

like whatever. It's so weird. Yep. I'm not even going to tell. I could probably replicate it, but I'm not going to. Yeah, it's just not like,

why would you, yeah. There is something uniquely horrible about when you're like sat down to watch something and like the person you're watching with isn't, doesn't feel the same way.

Yeah. It's the total opposite. When you hype it up a little. Yeah. Yeah. I've never, like, lost a friend or anything because of it. It's just more of a case of, like, if someone says their favorite movies, like Step Brothers or something, then I probably just won't bring it up or whatever, you know.

Yeah. One thing that does kind of pop into my mind is, like, a weird, what's the best way to describe it? I, like, lost a friend for reasons that were, like, quite religious, like, really heavily, religious and that came in the way I guess but it was just like weird to me because he like was obsessed

with Halo the video game Halo and the franchise Halo I just thought it was ironic considering what the like games are about and that love never left him it's just quite weird that is kind of funny well I don't know if funny is the right word

but I suppose there's humor to it okay yeah this can get over Rosie Othano I know There's nothing worse Well, music's the same way Like any kind of performance Trying to replicate that

It's very difficult performance to pull off Was music this year Sorry? I keep thinking about music Yeah Remember music? Oh yeah, okay, sorry You were talking about the film

Yeah Oh yeah Yeah, yeah It's so difficult Yeah, music And even then you're see You could be talking about Yeah, true, I didn't even realize

That's stupid Terrible title Terrible title I don't even think about that. Wait, broad. Yeah, that's so bad. That does invoke riding the bus with my sister.

I think I did make that comparison. Okay. Yeah, there's just this one scene from that movie that I keep revisiting because it's so fun to me. It's one of the, like, musical numbers where the guy who, like, holds down music to calm down has, like, a musical number where he's on, like, a treadmill with, like, the David Byrne big suit on. Yeah, it really tickles me for some reason whenever I watch you.

Yeah, it's so bad. I have family members and friends who I love or, you know, autistic or whoever. And I love them so much. But like when you see it in a movie and it's just like some guy going, blah, blah, blah, like a really bad actor. It's fucking terrible. It's not convincing at all, especially when you have experience with that kind of thing with those people.

Sure. Yeah, of course. But Dom Johnson asks this. Oh, great. Simple. Favorite swear word or phrase? Hmm. I've watched Deadwood recently.

They say cock sucker a lot. It's a fucking... I say piss. Never really used that much. I say piss more average than the... Or sorry, more than the average human being. It just comes up. How about shit?

I like shit. I say shit a lot. Piece of shit. Holy shit. The son of a shit. And then fuck. Shit and fuck are my favorite. Piss is one of those ones that not a lot of other people uses frequently.

And if I'm playing a video game on stream, it just comes out. Which one? Sorry. Piss. Piss. Just exclaiming. Oh, yeah, yeah. No, piss is a big one.

Piss is a good, but it's tame. I like shit and fuck. Those are hardcore. Yeah, fuck has a certain energy behind it that nothing else can match to me. Just a good fuck. British people can say cut. Australian people. Yeah, true.

That was more of Australian. And Australian people, yeah. You're more into that in like secondary school. You just every other word is real bad. Yeah. Also, fag. yeah that's who yeah i can't see yeah

um you're the one person that can't say it on the podcast yeah yeah yeah that's funny that's our privilege yeah just saying Jesus like just saying Jesus Christ

blaspheming quite like that yeah yeah Jesus apparently blasphemous yeah like you don't you wouldn't think Jesus Christ is a bad like a swear but it is

To use the Lord's name in vain in any way Like some people get really offended Yeah, it's a weird one Yeah, yeah Because some people think hell is a swear word Also that's weird That's like a location That's like a such a low

For me that's such a low Like that's a one out of ten Cursewell Like it's so tame Like you hear that in Fresh Prince of Bel Air Like Wilson says hell Like that's how tame it is You know it's so tame

Actually yeah Like the religious words Like adding holy before shit does make it something new and fresh but holy shit it does kind of hit different to just a normal yeah yeah for sure

well good thing this is at the end of the podcast and not the first 30 seconds or we'd be demonetized because that makes it different yeah sure fuck shit fuck fuck fuck yeah

swear words are fun but they you know I don't know they have as much power as you give them I've always kind of had that mentality you know like if nobody freaks out about them They don't mean anything. It's not magic.

This isn't a curse. I know we call them curse words, but it's not an actual fucking curse. Okay? Grow up. Their words. Sure, words have context. You can be offensive in certain contexts and others. But even if you ignore, you know, like, what's more offensive?

Somebody's saying fag or somebody saying, I don't believe gay people should have rights, right? You can say that, you can say more offensive things without using like a word out of context. I've always kind of had that mentality. But you can't win them all. and some people are sensitive and so I just try not to be rude. Yeah, the more you like break down language, the more just, God, it gets complicated. Yeah, exactly.

And like, as we've already mentioned, cunt means something incredibly different, depending on what country you're in and also fag. Yeah, like Edgar Wright said cunt in interview. It's not even anything now. Yeah. But like an American saying, that, like, their career would be over.

Like, I imagine a politician saint or some shit like that. It's not the same, yeah. It's so weird. Yeah, politicians say, what, pussy? Yeah. My prime minister did blackface. And he's elected for the third term. Fuck.

Hey, no one's perfect, you know. Yeah. We're bringing it back. All right. That's a good last question. Yeah, like when the president talks like the saloon owner in Deadwood. Yeah. We've all got really funny leaders in our country.

right now. All three of us. There's some amusement. Yeah, I guess Trump's down. Yeah, I guess Trump. But he didn't win. Biden didn't win the election, though. Sorry, I won't go there.

Yeah. He's the leader of the Republican party. A few years when he's out. Biden's kind of funny, too. Biden is funny. Fools asleep. Sleepy Joe. I don't mind Biden.

I'm more, I don't mind him. Yeah. We'll say, like, I don't mind him. All right. All right. Great last question. He's tolerable. I think it's time for a

recommendation from Alex. So, yes, my recommendation, and I wanted to keep in the horror theme, I kind of want to recommend a double bill, but I don't want to push it. That's fine. We can do double bill. Sure.

I just think it would make sense as all. It might make sense if I say the movies. It's actually a director. We've covered a fair few of his movies on this show, but this is all my favorite. from him by being Peter Jackson's brain dead Fuck yeah

Never seen What's the other one? Well, I've never seen bad taste But it is like a horror comedy In a similar vein I feel like Maybe putting them together Makes sense

Sure Horror one too Okay Yeah, I'll watch both of them Sure I've seen brain dead The Blu-ray is very Difficult to get

But I got one It's also Also this is very important Alternate title Is Dead Alive So you might find it under that. Oh, yeah.

Sometimes it's dead space alive. Sometimes it's dead dash alive. But, and sometimes it's brain dead. So you might have a difficult time finding the movie, but there's only one cut of it, I think. Yeah, that's weird. I don't know. Sometimes titles get changed. Is it because it's from New Zealand?

Distribution thing. Yeah, who knows? Yeah. Like in New Zealand, it had different title maybe. Never seen bad taste. Yeah, cool. So brain dead, dead alive and bad taste. Perfect.

Awesome. Excite. Hype. Damn. Okay. Yeah, if you don't want to be spoiled for brain dead and bad taste, watch them before the next episode. These episodes come out every two weeks, but you can listen to them early as they're edited. If you go to sardonicast.com and sign up for premium, only $2 a month.

That's like 50 cents a week. And also, we didn't bombard you with a bunch of sponsorships. You listen to other podcasts? They do that. Also, Patreon.com slash sardonicast. and we got merch so maybe get that Christmas is coming do your shopping early and then yeah for anybody expecting us to cover Venom let there be carnage we might not all be able to see it by next episode so probably the episode after just because of the different releases in different countries sort of thing so be patient about that one and we should be able to do it by the episode after next one yeah thank you all for listening happy shrek don't get chainside Thank you all.

Bye-bye. Bye, buddy. Take care.