Scheananigans with Scheana Shay - BravoCon Chaos, Psychic Misses & Erectile Differences

Episode Date: November 14, 2025

This week, Krystina Arielle is back in the studio with Scheana discussing everything from who they are excited to see at BravoCon to bedroom compatibility. Scheana shares how Brock tore his Achilles pushing a truck by himself (“he thinks he’s Thor”) and will be hobbling (or wheeled) around the convention center this year. They also dive into the latest RHONJ tea, discussing which cast members might be returning, plus what psychics got wrong about Kim Kardashian’s Bar Exam. The two get real about parenting meltdowns, emotional regulation, and why a child’s breakdown can actually mean you’re doing something right, not wrong. Then things take a spicy turn as they unpack Haley Kalil’s viral confession about her ex’s, uh, superhuman proportions—and why bigger isn’t always better. It’s the perfect blend of Bravo gossip, humor, and heart. Tune in! Follow us: @scheana @scheananigans Co-Host: @krystinaarielle Purchase your very own copy of the NYT Best-selling book MY GOOD SIDE at www.mygoodsidebook.com!Episode Sponsors:Don’t miss out on early Black Friday deals. Head to Wayfair.com now to shop Wayfair’s Black Friday deals for up to 70% off.Head to REVOLVE.com/GOODASGOLD, shop my edit, and take 15% off your first order with code GOODASGOLD.Head to https://www.squarespace.com/GOODASGOLD to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code GOODASGOLD.Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a dear media production. Hi, everyone. I'm Peyton Sarton, host of the Note to Self podcast. Note to Self is a space to embrace your unique qualities, get grounded, and ultimately have honest conversation. No topic is off limits. I began doing social media seven years ago, and since then, I've started a clothing line and this podcast. Note to Self is a place where people from every stage of life can come for advice, new perspectives, and to feel a little less alone. Whether I'm recording by myself or bringing along a friend, we will explore topics ranging from relationships and mental wellness to social media and entrepreneurship.

Tune in to note to self every week for the sisterly advice you didn't know you needed and raw conversations you've always wanted. From Vanderpump rules to motherhood and everywhere in between. Warm up the kettle, it's time to spill some tea. Let's get into some shenanigans with Sheena Shea. Hello everyone, and welcome back for another. week of shenanigans. I've got my girl Christina Ariel back in the co-host seat with me. How we doing? I'm good. It's good to be here. I get to hang out. Yes. I love the blue. Thank you.

What color was it last time you were here? Maybe it was blue. No, I think it was green last time I was here. Yeah. Because I don't remember. Yeah. I think it was definitely green. Is there any color of the rainbow you haven't done? Oh, no. I think I, I don't know. I really didn't start color my hair until like a year like two years ago yeah and then i just was like oh i'll just like i like i like it makes me feel good and i'm going to go with it when i met you you told me to put your name in my phone is tina pink hair and so on snapchat it's still tina pink hair but i've changed it in my contacts and my little snap moji still has pink hair when it sent you a message it does you were the only person that i talked to on snapchat like i don't have i like didn't even use my snapchat but you

I have Snapchats totally because you mess to be on Snapchat. I love it. Well, today is 1111. Is there anything you are manifesting? I'm manifesting that this year was a building year. And next year I'll see, like, the fruits of the work that I put in. And I just want to, like, see my family thrive and be happy and work hard. And, yeah, that's what I'm really excited about.

I'm trying to get my life together, my fitness. Yeah. So I'm manifesting. While you are, you're looking. Good. Thank you. Take a Pilates, which not in like an exclusive, like an exclusive Pilates kind of way. L.A. Fitness actually has Pilates now and they charge $119 a month, but it also gives you access to the glute room. It's really fantastic. Hashtag not an ad. Boom. It's not an ad. I'm just saying. No, I love that. But if you want to

pay for my membership, it's like their like COVID bounceback thing. Like they've made like all these like really nice. It's a reformer studio. And it's like, it's really like, it's really nice. then it's not like you can take all the classes you want in that month. I have made a commitment with one of the moms at summer school to start doing some Pilates with her after drop off. Every morning she goes to Pilates. I usually will go for a hike. She was like, you should join me sometime.

And I was like, okay, I will. And I said that last week, and I didn't put it on my calendar. And if it's not on my calendar, I will forget. So then I scheduled, which I love saying this, Brim and with Simon. And I felt so bad because I saw her that morning. I was like, oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. I was like next week.

And then I was sick all week. And so I was like next week and she looks at me yesterday. She was, I'm holding you to it. So now I'm putting it on the podcast. So I'll be at Pilates next week. Listen, you're going to feel, I like, listen, I'm not, I feel like I'm becoming a Pilates girl. I really am. Like, I don't know who this person is, but like, I got up early.

Like, I got up early on a day. I could have slept in my kids didn't have school today. I know. It's a holiday. Yeah. Well, I stayed up until four and I went to bed at seven. Girl. Four?

I mean, I know, but yeah. I got distracted. Yeah. It's the ADHD. I get it. I get it. So you're coming to BravoCon with me this week. What are you most excited about panels, people?

Do you have your outfits sorted? What's your vibe? I did. I curated all of my looks. Like right when you were saying you had just got done with yours, I was online like figuring out what I was going to do. and I'm just excited to be there and then I have a lot of friends

that are in the Bravo community that live in different places that I'm gonna see in one space and just like if you've ever seen any of like the um actually skits you know how much I love Bravo so this is like

I've done a lot of conventions but this one is this one is near and dear to my heart that's what were your first one right it is it's my first one I'm super excited is Sheena was like you can go and I was like

if you can't see my face it's a pulled, really excited one because I'm, oh, it's going to be so great. And I might see Sierra Miller, which makes me really happy because she's from Georgia and she's also gorgeous. And I just want to be like- Oh, for sure. I was just with her at the Glamour Women of the Year awards. She looked stunned. I mean, she's just a walking supermodel, you know, she would look good in a trash bag.

But she's hilarious. I know, I love her. And that, like, that is my, like, my goal. I want to say, what's up to Sierra. We'll make it happen. I'm going to like. That's an easy one. I think I'll mix it.

I'm going to sleep. I'm going to use blackout curtains and I'm going to sleep. Oh, that's different for you. Oh, my gosh. Yes, I'm so excited. I know. It's going to, it's, I'm just excited about experiencing it. Like, the rush of a convention.

Like, I'm used to going to conventions where it's like, we're talking about comic books. We're talking about all superheroes and TV. But this is, like, reality TV getting the respect that I believe it deserves. Because it is such a, like, it is. You know how I mean girls are like, it's like, It's like watching a dog walk around on its high legs when you see a teacher outside of it. And it is.

And it's nice to just kind of see people as they are and not what you're shown. And that's one of the great things about getting to know the people that I do know within that circle is everybody has been very genuine. And it's cool to like go in with no preconceived notions. It's like even though you know stuff, you're just like, it's still just a person with a cool job. Yeah. And there's so many fans who have, you know, paid thousands and things. thousands for these VIP tickets, but you can't pay for a backstage pass. You've got to know someone. So, listen, Sheena Shea knows everybody and I know Sheena Shea. Yes. I love it. Well, I'm so

excited you're coming with me. It worked out so well that originally, you know, my sister was supposed to come and then we hadn't talked about it. And so she made other plans. And I'm like, I don't know that I can switch the name on this ticket, but I did. So it's officially in your name. And then when a Brock's friends who was supposed to come couldn't come last. minute. And so my friend Mandy is flying out from New York. Oh, you got a full pass for her. I got a full pass for her. Oh, yay. Yeah. She's so excited. She's been coming with me ever since I've been on Bravo to every watch what happens live. Every event, anything I ever have on the East Coast, she's there with me. So to get to bring her to BravoCon, I'm so excited. It's going to be so much fun.

What are you excited about for BravoCon? Excited. What are you looking forward to? What are you dreading. I'm excited for my outfits. Thanks to Lisa Rina. She set me up with this amazing showroom that has the dopest looks because anyone who knows me knows I'm not a designer dressing girly. You know, I'm not going to go out and buy a Gucci dress, but I will rent one and that I did. So I'm excited to just be extra, extra, I guess, a little fancy. That's not really me normally, but I'm trying to up my game with the fashion. So I'm excited for my looks. I'm excited to see all of my friends.

Maddie Reese from Southern Hospitality has a DJ set at Zook Thursday night. So that's going to kick off the weekend. I'm going to go to that. Brock, unfortunately, tore his Achilles. We're waiting for MRI results. So he will be either hobbling around or I will be pushing him around. This was last, when did he break yesterday? This weekend on Saturday?

Running. No, he will. was helping out at Salty Horse with the coffee truck, the VW van that he restored. Yeah, did all of that. He was pushing it and he thinks in his mind that he's like Thor, that he's an actual Avenger and he can just do anything. And so there's a video of him. We'll pop it up here.

And he's pushing the van by himself and it just snaps. And he felt it. And in that moment, my sister was like, oh, just tell me what I have to do. I'll do it for you. And he's like, Courtney, you can't just like push this. I'm like, but Brock, you shouldn't have been pushing it by yourself. So now we're dealing with that. So he's been hobbling around.

He just, I love him. But I'm like, you are 35. You're not 25. You're just, you're not Superman. You know? Yeah. So him and Jason, maybe we'll just be pushing him around in wheelchairs or hobble. pulling around on crutches.

Listen, it's a wild time. I really hope it's accessible. I think about that so much more now with my mom, like being in her wheelchair. It's just like getting into the places. And like, it's a lot. There's a lot to wheel around and trying to like get over spaces.

He'll hobble before he lets me push him in a wheelchair. I know him. Pride comes before the fall. And you don't want to fall at BravoCon in front of all them people. They got cameras. Yeah, but he wouldn't care, honestly.

That tracks. Yeah. Did you see, speaking of Bravo stuff, that Gia and her uncle Joe Gorga are now following each other again on Instagram? And I guess Joe and Louis are as well. Oh, well, they... This is just from my Bravo news sources. I'm like, wait, do you have tea that I don't know?

So they had been working on a reconciliation between Teresa and Joe. I guess they've, like, had a couple of different meetings. Okay. So I'd assume if Teresa is good with Joe, then Gia's good with Joe. Yes. So, like, her, like, 1,000% allegiances to her mom and how her mom is leaning.

And so, and I think that's really good to see them get back together. Like, I hated to see them sitting there going at it, especially that's her godfather that's her uncle. I know. They were so close. And it's just, I feel, especially if you look back and you go, like, all the way back to the christening.

Like, we've seen them, like, through so many phases. And you hope at one point that everybody can just, like, put the sword down and just say, listen, Like at the end of the day, we're family. There's been a lot of hurt on all sides. Like, let's just wash your hands and keep it moving. And I hope that's what they're doing. I do too.

I also hope that assuming Real Housewives of New Jersey comes back, that we might see this reconciliation. Aren't they test filming? So from what I've heard from Little Birdies is, and I'm not going to say who, three of them are for sure coming back. But I don't know. that both Teresa and Melissa are one of those three. And that's all I'll say.

But I think that's part of like the reconciliation stuff. I think it's like, you know, I've got to like figure something out. But I also am interested to see what's going to with Dolores going to Rhode Island. Wait, she's going on that one? Yeah, she filmed for Rhode Island. What?

As like a friend of though, or as an actual housewife? She's like a friend of. Like, she's not like a housewife, which I love when they do housewife trades. It makes me so excited. Yeah. It's like, it's kind of like when they started doing like, girls trip and you got to see

everybody together. That's what I want. I want you to throw everybody together and I want to see how they interact because I hate when we pretend that these people do not know each other and everybody genuinely knows each other. That's what I love about Salt Lake right now. It's like below deck down under with the Salt Lake Housewives. And that poor

crew, every time they try and like check on them, Captain Jason comes to have dessert with them and he's like, nope, I'm going to excuse myself. Jason was not with it at all. The way he got up from that table and was like, And Daisy's like... Do you think him and Heather Gay hooked up?

I mean, she had like a drunken admission. She... But then she's like, wait. The way she said, delete that, delete that, delete that in the confessional, I feel, listen... I'll get the tea. Heather, Heather, Heather, do you... He's one text way. I wouldn't...

Listen, I want to know so bad what was going through that man's head because his face was telling 47 different stories on that... Right? Salt Lake is one of the greatest shows on television. It is so good. And it's like, they're in costumes sitting there like mascara running all over the face, dressed like zombies. Bronman's got an octopus on the side of her face.

And they're just like going at it. And, oh, my gosh, Meredith. What is it? You are a liar. And she said. Oh, my God. It was so good. It was so good.

Oh, my God. Oh, and a malicious person. Oh, my God. I love you, Meredith Marks. No, it's so good this season. I still can't wait until I have time. time to go back and watch the first few seasons because they never saw any of it. I know.

It is art. I wonder if Meredith's going to DJ at BravoCon. She is. There's something, I think, on the schedule. I remember seeing something somewhere. I don't know. But I do think so. But don't hold me to that.

Anyway, let's take a break. I'll see if I could check that on the break. And then we'll be right back. All right, y'all, Wayfair. I'm here to talk to you about it again because it is the place to show. shop for all things home. Everything from sofas to spatulas. I mean, you name it. They have it and you can get up to 70% off during Wayfair's Black Friday sale. So it's the holiday season. You know, whatever you need, Wayfair has. I personally needed some new silverware. I wanted a nice flatware set

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wardrobe is just one click away. Head to revolve.com slash good as gold, shop my edit, and take 15% off your first order with code good as gold. Fast two-day shipping, easy returns. It's literally the only place you need to shop from. That's revolve.com slash good as gold to shop my favorites and get 15% off your first order. with code good as gold. Offer ends November 28th, so happy shopping. Okay, I don't know about the Meredith thing. I guess we'll just have to look and find out or wait and find out.

To watch what happens live. Hey. I'm excited for those. There's got to be a squash the beef moment. I saw there was something online and it was like, who do you want to see squash the beef with? And it was like, Sheena with and then it was like fill in the blank. Oh, was it Gibson? I don't know. My friend told me she saw it. Gibson had posted this thing and it was like, who do you want to see? It was like Sheena, Tamara, and Katie. And then there's like a, oh my gosh, listen, there's no way they're not going to bring back out that squash the beef little like casino slot machine, which I think is fantastic. But I just wonder when it's going to be. Is it going to be at the Bravo's or at the holiday thing?

I don't think it would be at the bravos. I feel like what, like last year I feel like they did like two. They kind of like threw in another one. I don't even remember the shade assassin thing. But there's a, I think it's going to be on. something where it's like, it's got to be one of the ones where everybody is there. Anyway, moving on from Bravo and on to my girl Kim Kay. So there are some new clips making the rounds of Kim Kardashian on the phone saying that

four different psychics told her she would pass the California bar exam, which she just announced over the weekend that she didn't pass. So, I mean, first of all, the fact that she's even doing this, like huge kudos. You know, I mean, she has nothing left to prove to anyone. I think she is just top tier in everything. You know, she's built a billion dollar brand. She's raising four kids as a single mom, filming her own reality show, starring in a scripted show that was literally built around her. She is doing so much work with prison reform.

And also studying for the bar exam in her so-called free time. I mean, I don't know how she does it. I don't know how she does a quarter of what she does. But somehow she does it all. So zero shame in not passing the bar. I think it's inspiring that she's even attempting it. But I'm also wondering, because I am a big believer in psychics, did they tell her that she would pass just in general in the future?

Or did they say, next time you take the bar exam, you will pass? Because I do think she's the type. of woman where she's not going to give up until she reaches her highest potential and gets everything she wants in her career. She's going to keep taking that bar exam until she passes it. So I feel like the psychics

probably just meant like eventually should pass, right? Yeah, and I mean, listen, I love a psychic. But I feel like they are also like a little more vague than that. Like they're not really like direct about like on this day like this is going to happen.

I have had psychics tell me, like around next July da da da da da and i'm like oh shit and then i'm like in my head because i'm like okay so next july you know this might happen but kim told her friend on the phone that the psychics must be frauds and i was like okay wait a second first of all kim's not calling random like hotline readers you know she's not like one 800 psychic like hi am i going to pass the bar it's like this is Oprah's psychic yes that's what i'm saying she's like probably getting recommendations you know from people in her circle who swear by these intuitives like i mean she was on, she had a reading with John Edward, you know, I mean, there's like Sylvia Brown, like these

people who are huge psychics, I'm sure, are the ones that she's talking to. So it's like, how would four psychics all get it wrong? She's going to pass. Do you remember, was it, was it on Mori or was it on Montel and he used to have this psychic that came on Sylvia Brown? Yes. And she'd go, no, is that the bottom of a lake? Yes. Is not going to call you back? And like, no, I remember watching this, like growing up, I mean, she found missing persons. Yeah, but it also makes me think a real husband in Salt Lake City and Mary when she was like, nah, I don't want to talk to the psychic. Those are soothsayers. It's like, the devil speaks to them too. Mary is hilarious. Her, I mean, I love Meredith, but when she's like, I think you're boring. I think you're a bad friend. I was

like, ooh, tell us how you really feel, girl. Listen, filter list is great. I know. But I will say, like with regard to that, anybody that picks up a book and goes back to school, especially like, like, I can say like, she's, we're around the same age, like, at my big age, like, I'm not trying to go back to anybody's school except for like something that's like a hobby,

not trying to get a whole law degree. Yeah. So, listen, do you? And I don't know. She's one of those people. She does do everything. She says she wants to do. So she does it all.

I'm sure the best. With psychics, would you rather know an outcome in advance or go through the journey not knowing. Ooh, that's tough because I'm very nosy and I like to know stuff in advance. It's kind of like when you go and you read ahead about what's going to happen and something like I'm that person.

I need to go and like look at an IAMDB and like find out like what's on it. Ooh, I don't know. I had a psychic tell me like three psychics in one year tell me that I was on the right path and to keep doing what I was doing and that was the year that I like left my job and like started my career career.

And so I'm a big believer in just, like, hope and step it out on faith. So. Trusting the universe. Yeah. Manifesting. Yeah. Like, I don't believe there's anything that, like, I can't do if I put my mind to it. But I also do want to know sometimes. But I don't want to spend the money to know. Yeah. And I think that's what it comes down to.

But I will read my horoscope. And I feel like that's kind of in line. It's in the same vein or getting one of those, like, apps on your phone that tells you, like, hey, like, this is your psychic outlook. But I'm, no, I think I'm scared to know. I'm a big believer in psychics. And so when I was coming to the decision of, am I going to film the Valley, am I not? I did consult not one, but two psychics. And they both told me not to do it. That's not the reason why I didn't do it.

But with just hearing what they had to say and seeing red flags and whatnot, and I was like, you know, my decision, I was feeling like I was being pushed in one direction, but I needed to go in this direction. And so we'll see if the things they said are going to happen from me walking away happen. But it's 11-11. It's a big manifesting day. I'm going to do my moon rituals and stuff tonight

and burn some bay leaves and light some shit on fire. I genuinely, like, believe that, like, in people who have intuitive thoughts and things of that nature. And I, like, I've had dreams where stuff happens before. And, like, before it does. and obviously, like, people that believe in deja vu. Like, I've experienced it. I love it.

I just think it's so powerful to, like, hear a message from somebody else and have them say, like, this was on my heart. It's kind of like when your friend is having a bad day and you instinctively, like, pick up the phone and call them. And you have that connection. Like, I believe all of those kinds of things are here, and I think they're really beautiful. Yeah.

Do you believe in telepathy? I do because of my sister. Yeah. I feel like there's no way my sister exists in this world. and we can communicate the way that we do without like a little gene gray going on i can't remember where i heard this recently but it was something about nonverbal autistic children and just people in general who are able to communicate with telepathy and like there's this whole other world of how they're able to communicate it was i need to find that because it was wild i know i totally believe

With your kids, like you knew how to, like, figure out what your kids needed to into it. Like, they found their way to connect to you, like, as a baby to let you know what they needed. Like, you had to form that connection to know, like, how they survived. Yeah. There were, like, studies done, and it was, like, a mother and her kid. And it was exactly what the kid wanted, but it was a nonverbal child. And the mom, and they were just able to communicate like that. And they said that they can tap in just, like, with, like, different frequencies and

energies and all of that, but that they can tap in and communicate with other nonverbal. No, I think that's, there are so many, I think even like Brittany posted about it, there's lots of things that you can use to communicate. Anything that helps a child feel heard when they can't speak out for themselves, I think is extremely important. And I just like anytime something like that, like there's a breakthrough or something that could help. As a neurodivergent person, myself like it's very important to me to like know how think that people are working on it and that people care enough to do something about it yeah for sure okay now still kind of sticking on the topic of kids but obviously we're both busy working moms you know just balancing a professional

life with real life parenting and all of that do you ever have those moments as a mom where your kid is an angel at school perfect for the babysitter grandma, nanny, whoever, but then falls apart the second they see you. Oh, yes. Absolutely. Okay. So this happens to me a lot. And I was reading something recently that the meltdown is not a reflection of bad parenting.

Because sometimes it's like, and my mom makes these comments where she's like, well, she doesn't act like that with me. And then it's like she doesn't act like that at school. And I'm like, oh, okay, so you're saying I'm the problem. but no, it's actually proof of trust. So I saw something and it really stuck with me. It said your child's meltdown when you walk in the door isn't a sign you're doing something wrong.

It's actually a sign they feel safe enough to finally let go. It's like all day they are doing just the work to be on their best behavior. You know, they're doing 100 to do everything correct at school to just make their teachers happy to not get in trouble, whatever it is. And then the second they see you, it's like, Okay, I can let it all go, you know. And so I said this to my mom and she was like, oh, that actually makes sense. I'm like, I'm her safe space. Brock is her safe space, but more so it's me. But she does act differently with us. And so I'm like, mom, it's not like we're doing something different or our parenting isn't the right style or whatever. It's I'm her safe space. And so I just want to put this out there to any parents who are listening who feel like,

like, they're doing something wrong. You're not doing something wrong. You're doing everything right that you're your child's safe space. And when I saw this recently, it just made me feel so much better. And also, any time I can just prove to my mom that I'm right and she's not, I love. Because my mom did an amazing job raising me. And we go back and forth with this where I say something about therapy and she's like, oh yeah, you just had such a horrible childhood, Sheena.

And I'm like, no, mom. I've never said I had a horrible childhood. Okay. That is being extreme. I had an amazing childhood. But there are things that I've now learned. There are tools that we are given now where we can parent differently and give our kids those tools. And so there's nothing that you did wrong. And there's nothing that I'm currently doing wrong. It's not that your way is better than mine. It's just now we understand our kids a little bit better. And I saw this child psychologist, Dr. Suzanne Zedek, studied emotional regulation and young children across different caregiver contexts.

Kids who fell apart with their primary caregiver show stronger attachment security, not weaker. The meltdown is proof of trust, not evidence of poor parenting. So there was also a neuroscientist, Dr. Bruce Perry, who calls this restraint collapse. It's like your child's nervous system has been in a low-level stress state all day, managing social rules, suppressing impulses, regulating emotions, all of the things. school or, you know, wherever they are. And when you get them back, it's just like, they are able to release it all. They're able to have that fit. Act crazy. Scream at you. Yeah, but it's like,

I would have breakdowns where I'm just like, I feel like I'm doing everything wrong. I remember specifically a time when Janet and Jared were over and she was giving me the hardest time. And I just went outside and was just like sobbing and I'm like I'm such a bad mom and they're like no and I didn't know I thought I was doing something wrong and then once I saw this I was like oh my god I'm just her safe space so I felt like this was important to talk about especially with you a fellow mom because I think that so many people can relate to this and it's easy to blame yourself but it's like no we're just who they feel most comfortable around that they can act insane and it's it's okay because you're there to comfort them.

Before I answer this, give me your hand. Okay. So I feel very passionately about this. I, like, those are my kids. They are, oh, they're so well-behaved, which a lot of that comes down to, like, I'm from the South,

and so much of what you learn, part of it, especially being a black woman, is about staying safe through respect and things of that nature. And so I find myself, like, reminding myself that they're kids and, like, they don't have to be perfect with me, like, that they have that space. Because, listen, my daughter will, before I left today, she's like, I don't want you to go to work. And I was like, okay, I'm sorry, like, I'd have to, but I love you. And she throws herself on the floor, and that's the moment, like, I can't get upset with her.

She's three. She doesn't have the emotional capacity to process this feeling except for, like, my mom's leaving. I'm sad about it. And all I can do is, hey, like, sit there, give her a hug and hold her. But the fact that she can communicate with me, that Ezekiel can communicate with me and tell me about their feelings, it's so, I'm glad to be their safe space. My big thing that I say to myself all the time is I don't want to be my kid's trauma. Like, that is my greatest fear is like. Same.

I think that's every parent's biggest fear with. I think it's being, like, especially considering, like, the nature of what we do for a living. And people will say, oh, like, you're gone all the time. It's like, no, what you're seeing. Like, I am home. I am in class. Like, I do not remember my mom being, like, as necessary at school as I feel like with when you have, like, parent-teacher conferences, but you also have, like, different assemblies and things like that throughout the month while also trying to, like, be present. I think I've missed one event at school.

And I just like I want them to know that they're loved and I want to show up for them in every single solitary thing and to go to school and be in that space where you do have to like be on your guard. This is always first year of school like going to preschool and going from being like absolutely feral in the house like we're going to jump on the table

and like my house is not like pristine. My house is pillows and a couch that is for jumping and I love it and I love when they're okay not when it's seven o'clock in the morning and somebody is like jumping because they want to climb on my headboard and I'm very very tired like that doesn't count but that's neither here nor there but I love that our children trust us I love that we're of a generation where we're seeing our children as people and giving them the space to have their emotions we're allowing them to have big feelings we're identifying those big feelings and so much of what they learn about it is from us if

we're reacting to them in like, and I have to check myself about like putting my anxiety on my kids, especially like when we're out. And for me, like, sometimes it's hard because like my kid may be bigger or this and like my kid is full of energy and I don't want somebody like thinking that he's like rough or he's like being too much or anything like that. And then I don't want to ever feel like I'm making him feel like too much. And I have to check myself on that. I don't want him to like feel that I just want them to always feel like they can be exactly who they are. And you have great kids. You are doing such an amazing job. Your kids are so well-mannered. They're so kind. They're so sweet. Like you have really, really great kids. And I love that we can

have our kids grow up together and that their kids, I want mine to be around. You know, I would never have to worry if they're in a room playing together that one of them's going to say something out of pocket or hit summer or any it's like they get along so well and I love when my friends kids and mine just click and that goes down to parenting you know so if no one's told you that today you're doing a great job you're doing a great job oh it makes me think about that bluey episode there's an episode of blueie and it's like you're like you're Oh, baby race. Yes, that one.

Uh-huh. I know exactly what you're talking about. There's like this mom and like, Bluie's mom is like, oh my God, my baby sat up. My baby sat up and so excited about it. And then it's- The competition of it. And then this mom's baby is standing up and she gets so intimidated by it that she stops going to this day care, like to this mommy group. Because she just feels so intimidated. And there's another mom that comes over and it's like, oh, why didn't you come?

And she's like, oh, like, I just maybe it wasn't for me. I just felt that. And she just puts her hand on her and she says, you're doing a great job. And I just remember watching that episode postpartum bawling my eyes out, like with a sleeping baby with the life lessons. Listen, that show, I feel like I'm a better parent because of blueie. Yeah. I love it. It's so good. It is.

And it's like we, listen, listen, I love me some summer moon. And my kids love the summer mood. And it's just great that they, like you see that in them. Like, summer is extremely sweet. She's so kind. Like, she just, like, she's so sweet with Zoe. And Zoe is smaller, but Zoe thinks that she is also four and five years old, like they are. And it's like, no, you're like, but you can't tell her nothing.

And I love that. I love that my child is like, I don't want her to argue with me. But I love that she feels safe enough to, like, say her feelings. I went to a parent teacher conference and her teacher told me that she stands up for herself a lot. Like she and I was like, oh, that's fantastic. Yeah. I was like, I want to hear that. I want to hear that my child has a backbone.

I don't want to hear my child as being disrespectful. But I want to hear that my child knows that she can advocate for herself at three years old so that she carries that through the rest of her life. I want all of my children to be able to advocate for themselves. And we're creating that world. We are so responsible for the world that they live in and that they're creating and that they're going to take out. We're sending people out into the world. And it's up to us to make sure that those are good people, kind, people, empathetic people, because the world needs more. Yeah, and not raising pushovers.

Yes. Yeah. Stand up for yourself. I love Summer does that too. And I think since she's been in school, she's gotten better with that. I think jujitsu has given her the confidence. Then now she's just like, you know, this is what I want. And she doesn't let her little friends walk all over her.

If they're like, this is my, I love to see it. He's also super independent. Like, she's, the way that you guys, like, let her do stuff. Yeah. Just kind of, like, you don't just say, here, I'm going to do this for you. Like, you teach her to do it for herself. And that's really, like, cool to see that, like, watching her with Brock, like, build something. Yeah.

They're literally, like, she's got her Timberlands and her, like, work vest and all of this stuff. Her little tool belt. And it's just, like, it's cute. And, like, that's how tone is with the kids where it's, we're going in the backyard. And we did a fire last night. Mm-hmm. And Zoe, like, wanted to chop Because they were chopping wood

And she's like, I wanted to her. And so she got to chop in. So we're, like, holding her, like, making sure that she's safe and everything. But she, when she got that thing through the wood, she was so proud of herself. And it's like, that confidence comes from, like, letting them do stuff.

And I have to learn that. And it's scary at times, but you have to let them. Okay, we're going to take one more break and then we'll be right back. And now I'm back to talk to you about Squarespace because this podcast is sponsored by Squarespace, I have used this personally for my website, for selling merch, for whatever you need. If you're starting a new business, if you're growing a brand that you already have, Squarespace makes it so easy.

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website or domain. Okay, still sticking on the topic of meltdowns. I mean, we know that that's actually a sign of security and not failure. I feel like I can know all of the psychology in the world, but I'm still going to feel my blood pressure. spike whenever she is having a meltdown because I still, no matter what, feel like I'm doing something wrong and I need to fix it like immediately. But there are some tips and tricks that I read about and it's such a relief to realize that those meltdowns do mean that you're the safe space, you know, but it still doesn't make them easy. I still just feel it in my nervous system, you know. So I wanted to go through a few tools and mindsets that can really help in those

moments for you guys. And these are things that you can say or do to turn your chaos into connection. The first one is name it to tame it. It's like you worked hard all day and now your feelings are catching up. Naming emotions engages a child's prefrontal cortex and helps them regulate their nervous system. The next one is don't fix, just contain. You don't have to stop the emotion. You just have to be the container for it. Sitting beside a crying child calmly actually teaches regulation through co-regulation and avoid using phrases like calm down or you're fine, which I have to tell myself because I'm always like, it's okay, you're okay. But instead, if you use calm, present, soft tone and proximity instead, rituals of safety have a transition

ritual after school or daycare, snack, cuddle, decompress, you know, play soft music or do a no-talk car ride for five minutes. For toddlers, maybe a cozy corner or a hug break. I know summer sometimes when she's having to meltdown, I just, I hug her. I'm like, it's okay. Just I give her a hug and then eventually she calms down. Another one is regulate yourself first. You know, if I'm escalating, they're escalating.

And your reaction, like, perfect example, Christina, your reaction when. Zoe, but I'll have your back on this one. But when Zoe fell down when we were at the Travel Town Train Museum and her shoe did fall off. Her shoe, the way it fell off, Homegirl looked like her leg was twisted and broken. I was screaming.

And I like, my chest, all I heard was like hers. Like the kids were like running around playing and I just heard her screaming. And I get over there and I look down and it looks like like her shoe is turned so her leg looks broken. It did.

And Tony and Brock are laughing. They're just like, because they knew she was fine and it was her shoe. And me and she and are like, but like the reaction of when you go and you scream like, then they're like, what happened? What happened? Like she was fine.

She just slipped. Her leg was not broken. She was not injured. She was fine. But then when we have a crazy reaction, which you know what I also realize is I have a bigger reaction when Brock is around. When I'm by myself and she gets hurt, I'm calm as fuck.

I don't know how. But when he's there, I'm like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Because then he'll call me and it's like everything's fine. But that's the big thing is you got to regulate yourself first. So we have to work on that, you know? But it's like sometimes I feel like I have to narrate my own regulation where it's like, Mommy needs to take a deep breath.

Everything's going to be okay. She's a child. It'll help both of us. But the last one is shift the goal. So instead of stopping the behavior, aim for restoring. connection. When kids feel safe again, the behavior resolves naturally. So it's kind of freeing once you realize your job isn't to stop the meltdown. It's to be calm after the storm. To not scream when you think the leg is broken because what is that reaction going to do other than terrify your

child? If you stay calm, it's going to help them. And easier said than done because I've had both reactions. But when Summer actually broke her arm, I was calm as fuck. I don't know how, but I just was like, if I scream, it's going to scare her more. So I just need to stay calm. But girl, I felt for you in that instance because when I saw the leg, I was like, oh, they weren't laughing at the child being like possibly hurt. No, they were laughing at your reaction. Screaming. Yes. It's just because I was brought out of a conversation. And I know that I can work on that. And I have to regulate myself before I can regulate and also get. down on their level is really helpful.

So next time your kid loses it over whatever it may be. It could be the wrong color straw in their cup, which summer has had meltouts. I wanted the pink one. And I'm like, well, you're getting red. The pink is in the dishwasher and the dishwasher is running. Like, deal with it, you know. But just take a deep breath and just say, this is emotional intelligence in progress. Or just maybe, you know, pour yourself a glass of mescaloom after bedtime.

You know, whatever works. Smoke a joint, whatever you need to do. But anyway, moving on to a couple other fun topics. Do we want to go with Barbies and Hot Wheels or divorce because of penis size? I would like to know what's going on and why this divorce. Like, I want to know what is the, is it the, is it the, uh, too large or do I want to? Well, Haley Kalil, former Sports Illustrated model recently revealed that her marriage to NFL player Matt Kalil ended not because of emotional distance or infidelity,

but because quite literally their physical compatibility was impossible. She said he was so well endowed that sex became painful. And despite trying everything, it just couldn't work. Okay. I mean, I've heard of irreconcilable differences, right? Isn't that what every celebrity marriage that doesn't work out? I mean, honestly, I think that's what we filed for in my divorce and they're done that. But this is next level.

It's like my husband's dick is too big. It hurts. Irrectile differences. Oh my God. Don't make me laugh. It makes me cough. But Haley just said that the reason she divorced her husband because he was too big. Like two or three coat cans put together big.

I mean, ow. Also, been there, done that. Wouldn't marry it. Just, I mean, you know how big it is before you marry him. But like. Unless you don't. Just drive the car. I guess.

But in this instance, you know, maybe bigger isn't always better. I don't know. I am of one mind about this as I try to process my thoughts. It comes back to one thing. There's a song on TikTok and it's like, I would like to know less about you. And like sometimes I'd feel like sometimes, yeah, okay. Mm-hmm. Maybe we say, you know what, we were, that's why I reconcilable differences exist. Yeah, I mean, sexual compatibility isn't just about attraction. It's about physical comfort, emotional connection, mutual satisfaction, you know, all of the things.

In Haley's case, it's literal physical mismatch. But it opens the door to a broader... I wonder how long they were married. I don't know how long they were married. But it does open the door to a broader conversation. Like, what does compatibility really mean in relationships? Because I feel like people think sexual chemistry is automatic if you're attracted to someone. But that's not always true. I feel like there's technique, comfort levels, communication. And yeah, sometimes biology just has other plans. It's like trying to plug an HDMI into a USB port. You know, some things just don't connect. Some things just don't fit. I mean, that certainly wasn't fit in another hole, you know? But, oh, you know what? I did forget to say this because she also did mention that she was

a virgin before marriage. So that is another layer, which she had no frame of reference. But that's also where it's like, okay, do you think waiting until marriage can sometimes make it harder to know if you're sexually compatible? Well, 100%. You know? Especially if you're not, like there's people who don't even kiss until they get to the altar and things like that. And I think that that's one of those things that does lead to like the downfall of a marriage. If you're not like somebody has a drive that's more so than the other. That's why I believe in living with each other before marriage. Because I feel like you don't know somebody until you live with them for an extended period of time and you see their habits.

It's like traveling with somebody. And there's people who cannot hook up unless you're mentally attracted to someone. So let alone like being in a situation where this is her. first situation and that's what she's going into. And I feel like we're kind of setting people up for failure when we don't prepare like, prepare like girl women to go into this life or our kids periods. Like these are important things that you need to know. And instead of being like deeply involved in like stay pure, stay pure and putting all of this weight on this like moral complex about it. Like we should be talking about these things. Right. What are you going to do?

Yeah. Well, kind of piggybacking on that and this. likely be a controversial thing to say, but here I go. I feel like there is so much romanticizing around a woman being pure, you know, before marriage and all of that. But honestly, it's like, I think you can learn a lot about yourself and your needs as a woman through experience. And I mean, I can speak about this from personal experience because like I never had orgasms before Brock. I never masturbated or had a vibrator before Brock. I never had any of those things. And it's just like I felt like I wasn't really in touch with my sexuality. I had a lot of sex, but I never came to completion, you know?

Because you're taught so much about pleasuring somewhere and else that you don't necessarily take the time to learn about pleasuring yourself, that it's important to know your own body and what you enjoy. So it's great when somebody can call that out and say, this is not for me. Yeah. And like physical pleasure has way more to do with communication, trust, and rhythm than size. I don't think bigger is always better. I've had bigger.

Wasn't better. It just, I mean, it all comes down to as long as the motion of the ocean. But, I mean, those things really, it is important to make sure that you're compatible because this is the person that you're presumably going to be with for the rest of your life. And you're going to either get used to each other or not. Yeah. Somebody's going to be miserable. And would you rather stay in a situation where she could stay in literal pain?

Yeah. Or just say, like, hey, like, let's chop it up. this is just not going to work. No, and that's like heartbreaking for couples who actually love each other because as wild as their story may sound, it is a real reminder that compatibility comes in all forms. You can love someone to death and it's still not be a fit, you know, and that's okay. It's like, would you rather date someone you have instant sexual chemistry with but no emotional depth or someone emotionally perfect but where physically like there's never quite that spark that

clicks and yeah it's um it's a tough pill to swallow sometimes and sometimes it's too big listen i'm chilling anyway to wrap it up jack's hole of the day i'm just going to give it to all of the people poking fun at kim k for not passing the california bar exam because my girl does it all and we need to keep that respect on her name so thank you guys all for listening thank you christina for joining me on the podcast and bravo con this week I can't wait. I hope next week's shenanigans are going to be BravoCon filled. And if you haven't gotten a copy of the New York Times bestselling book,

my good side, head to my goodsidebook.com. And, uh, yeah, off to Vegas we go. Yay. Woo! Thanks for listening to shenanigans with Sheena Shea. Tune in next time for juicy updates from the world of reality TV, pop culture, and more. Download new episodes every week. on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you like to listen.

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