SciShow Tangents - Bonus Backlog Bonanza - Minions Movie Commentary

Episode Date: August 26, 2025

This bonus episode was originally posted on Patreon on February 14, 2024 titled "Minions. Commentary. + Announcement."Original Patreon description: Besties, Followers, Fangents, we've been so busy putting the final touches on this GLORIOUS Minions Movie Commentary and planning for our time on the Project for Awesome livestream, that we won't be able to do a bonus podcast episode this month. You'll probably be too busy queueing up your copy of the Minions movie to enjoy one anyway, but we seriously hope the shenanigans of the livestream make up for how much you'll miss us this month and we'll be back to our regular programming next month.SciShow Tangents is on YouTube! Go to www.youtube.com/scishowtangents to check out this episode with the added bonus of seeing our faces! And go to https://complexly.store/collections/scishow-tangents to buy some great Tangents merch!While you're at it, check out the Tangents crew on socials:Ceri: @ceriley.bsky.social@rhinoceri on InstagramSam: @im-sam-schultz.bsky.social@im_sam_schultz on InstagramHank: @hankgreen on X

Hello, everyone, and welcome to a minions commentary. That's what they call it. I'm here with Sarah Riley and Sam Schultz. Hello. Hello. And you're getting this because you're a patron of our Patreon of SciShow Tangents. And as you may or may not know, during SciShow Tangents, we have asked the real questions. Like, are minions just little animals full of their own piss?

They just fill up with piss, and that's why they're yellow. So we want to test our hypothesis by watching the 2015 Minions movie. Do you want to do some Minions, some Minions predictions, what we think will happen in the Minions movie? I predict some, a Minion will indeed urinate, and it will be the best moment of our lives. That's my guess. I think, I think a Minion, I think I'm going to see a Minion's ass. That is almost 100%, 190% guaranteed. I think the minions are going to pretend to be a creature that they are not,

whether it's three minions stacked in a trench coat or a cow or something, and everyone's going to be fooled for a little while longer than they should be. Then they'll say, hey, this guy's a minions. Yeah. No freaking way. What movie are we watching? It's just Minions is the title of the movie, right? So I've never seen a Minions movie.

We're watching Minions. Minions, the prequel, I think it's the fourth in the series. I think there's despicable me one through three minions and then Minions Rise of Guru, I believe, is that. No, I don't think that's how it went. This is what I researched because I didn't want to do the wrong movie. I did research. I did do a little bit of research because I don't have Netflix anymore. I was using my dad's account and then got kicked off.

in the great Netflix wanting you to have your own account situation. So it was Despicable Me, then Dispicable Me Too, then Minions. Minions was Minions in 2015 was the third movie that was released, but it is the earliest movie in the sequence of the Minion of like the Dispicable Me extended universe. Then came the Minion's Rise of Gru. Okay. That's a separate one. It's a separate movie. and then Dispicable Me 3 came out, and Dispicable Me 4 is in the works, apparently.

So, we're earliest in the Dispicable Me timeline, but middle of when they were producing movies. Oh, so it's like, so this is like a prequel. Yes, this is a prequel. This is going to teach us a lot about characters and stuff we don't know nothing about. Can I make one last prediction? Yeah. Yes. Before we start this movie.

And we're going to count down. We're all going to play the movie at the same time. And by all of us, I mean, you at home and us, and we're going to watch it at 720P and a discord call. That's right. I'm going to predict, and this is risky, this is my risky prediction, that the minions will abuse some substances. I think they're going to get high. It does take place in the 70s. Nice.

There's many different substances they could abuse. Yeah. And there must be a reason that they are beloved. Two? Yes. Oh, absolutely. I hope so. They'll be hiccuping.

And then they'll pee. Yeah. And then we'll all be happy, won't we? It's true. They're going to drink a lot of coffee, a lot of alcohol, a lot of water, and all that's going to go straight into the bulk. Okay. Okay. We're ready.

All right. We're going to push play at the very beginning of the Minions movie in three, two, one, go! Okay. all right we've this is the part that we've watched several times before we're setting up the call very familiar at this part we hated it then and we hate it now the sweet songs do you guys like minions or hate minions um i'm i like minions i think that like as a wow i am having a problem right now i think that like i would suggest not watching that part five times Or are we going to get some science to start off with? We've got definitely... I think it looks like it. Is that the piss in the corner?

That's the piss that will infest the... Oh, wow. It's living piss. They don't have a nucleus in their cells. They don't have anything. Are they evolving? This is not how evolution works. Just by the way.

We're going to have to make a whole video on how this is not how things work. Oh, no. It led some ancient. Yeah, you can't just poop out a flagella. If some of them have two eyes and some of them have one eyes, does that mean that they're different species or what? Nope, they're the same species. It's just dimorphism.

I don't know if it's sexual dimorphism because I don't think they have sexes. I'm pretty hopeful that they don't have sex. Well, they've got to refra, I guess then they would, they have to have some sort of reproduction. They could bud? They definitely bud. Well, they buttoned already. I think what we're seeing is every minion that ever will exist is existing right now.

So they don't make any more? And they don't die. Minions are immortal. It's possible that this house has Korean subtitles. Oh, no, it didn't. It just did for the word minions. Okay. It's always legitimate when you see foreign language subtitles on a movie.

Oh, what is he peeing right now? Oh, no. No, he's. They do have gender. He's covering his nipples. They at least have nipples. I don't think they have nipples. They definitely don't have nipples.

Because there's no nipple under the starfish. They do not lactate, I don't think. No, not mammals. Not mammals. Okay, so they want to follow the most despicable person that exists. It's that dinosaur. That's why they're minions. Bananas.

Oh, boy. I should have predicted bananas. They wear loincloths. I don't think those. They had no shame. That is, that is one thing. Hmm. Oh, ow.

Are they going to extinct the dinosaurs? I'm so sure that that's about to be what happens. Yeah, we didn't predict that either. I should have. This is a very dexterous Tyrannosaur. Those ones will be fine, though, because minions are immortal. They are mortal. I think that is a factual thing about that.

Oh, it's fine. He's going to stand up and he's going to kill his boss. Mm-hmm. And then this will lead to the extinction of all life on Earth. No, just the non-avian dinosaurs. Okay. Right. You idiot.

Guys. Well, that could be gender neutral, I guess. They did not as extermination. terminate the dinosaurs? No. But they survived the mass extinction event. Mm-hmm. You did.

They do like to wear something on their lower half, so maybe we won't see any butt. And something around their eyeball, which is, seems very silly and excessive. Yeah, they had the goggles in the beginning. They've never not had the goggles. They somehow had goggles. I didn't look to see what they were made out of, though. They were made out of plants. Yeah.

They were, okay. Seweed or something. But not when they were underwater. So I think this reinforces our piss theory. Like their eyes need to be submerged in liquid for them to be able to see. That's the only reason for goggles. And what's the liquid, Sarah? And the liquid, I think, is a little bit of water with a little bit of urea inside and some other stuff.

Yeah. It's just piss. It's just piss. Yeah. I feel like we've made a mistake. Uh, which one? This is just a movie, this, what? That's, that's not how things work.

No. Is that same one killing all of them? Yeah. I think he's the biggest mass murderer in the history of our... How do you tell the difference between minions? They do all look slightly different. They have different hairs. Yeah, the hair.

I believe. That is one thing that has changed. over time oh man there's a lot of death very quickly in this movie and they know what birthdays are yeah and yet they haven't celebrated their own oh no wow not what happens in the whole wow it just it just hit him in the butt and he flew away he's fine everybody he's fine Although all the Egyptians under the pyramid, they're fine too. They're just a little bit. They're just another fine, Sam.

Uh-oh. Our movie broke. Oh, no. It can't break. Did it break? We have to keep going in order. It can't break. That's part of the deal.

It literally can't. So that's the one thing I know about this process. Tuna, are you there? Oh, fuck Oh shit Well Maybe we need to watch this on Netflix You all push play

And we have to relive the first five minutes 30 seconds of the movie again Ah, the stream is ended Did you streak into this? Oh, no, they're still going. It's still going. We're good. we're good we're still watching okay oh yeah you just saw minion lore that we didn't yeah we'll never know

what it is we will never know what happened in between napoleon dying and the ice age maybe yeah i don't know what happened i don't know what we this is a great movie to do a commentary of though because there's not a lot of words. Did Napoleon send them away or something? Because they're still dressed like Napoleon. Maybe. Kevin? That's Kevin.

I didn't know they had names. Bob is another one. Stu, I believe, is another one. How did they get their names? Did they self-assign their names? Just like us. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. all right Kevin get your shit together man he doesn't need it he doesn't need it that's right he's a bold leader natural leader he's the Hank green of the minions world so next time it freezes we got to say tuna it froze and then he'll turn it on it back off

and everything'll be fine and then it'll have kept going yeah fingers crossed tuna don't fall asleep if it breaks a half an hour in we're doing an adult Another time. These minions are cold and it's like negative 10 degrees here. So we're cold too. Yeah.

You know? We're feeling like the minions. Yeah. It's like smell of vision. My car won't start, so that's not good. Oh, is that one alive? I found a dead minion. The first dead minion.

We didn't know that could happen. This guy's the artistic. Oh, he's got different colored eyes. Yeah. Is that how you know he's the artistic one? No, no, he's got a instrument. See? Oh, got it.

I don't know. Do you guys know what the thing that they're trying to do is? Uh-oh. Trying to find a champion who will go through the cave? I think they're trying to, yeah. Uh-oh. Wow. He fart.

Gravity just changed a lot. They're going to take that guy. I don't think he farted. I think that was the poof from this crushed body. Yeah. That was just a little bit of urine. And then it was so cold that it kind of like steam turned into crystals in the air. Mannyance, man, yeah, that's excellent. What are they doing?

I think they're going out to find a new guy. Okay. But they can't all go for some reason. because they're unwelcome. Or they're scared. We are guessing, and I feel like people watching no more than we do. Yeah. We've not paid enough attention.

Have you ever thought that, I've ever. They're wanted for so much murder. What do you think is in their backpacks? Exactly. Banana. They immediately took a banana out. I think you ask that. I think the one with the different colored eyes just has a teddy bear.

Yes. And Kevin has packed intelligently. Yeah. I'll tell you what, a bandana on the end of a stick has got to be the worst possible way to carry objects. Well, it's better than not having anything, right? I don't know. Like, you can't fit a lot in a bandana. I could just hold it.

Yeah. Like, you have to hold it. hold the stick. You could just hold the bandana. You could hold a lot of like beans or something in the bandana maybe. Maybe a lot of beans. But you wouldn't know if you were dropping them. That's so far behind you. One one bean could drop at a time. I wouldn't notice. This sure is a movie during which things are happening, question mark. I'm not sure if that's true. Sarah, you're absolutely right that they need to hold water around their eyes, which makes sense for fish that are on land.

Like the way that we need to hold air around our eyes to see correctly, fish would need to hold water around their eyes. Yes. But I can't think of any other explanation why they emerge from the water. And need to have. That really doesn't make a lot of sense. So you're saying that right now there's water. There's water in those cup.

Yeah. I like that. That's not how you eat a banana, dude. Yeah, you don't lick a banana. Oh. They both lick. Maybe that's how minions eat bananas, though. We haven't seen a single one eat.

They lick and suck. I was about to ask. We haven't seen one actually eat a banana, have we? I don't think so. Not in this movie. Or we weren't paying attention. All right. 1968.

1968. They were in the Arctic. The Ramones, I can't hear it very well. No, it's a... Is it Rolling Stones? I'm not even going to... I'm not going to participate. Sorry, who do you think it is?

I think that looks great, buddy. Oh, I like that, too. I think that also looks awesome. Ah! I don't do that. Almost your butt joke. Oh, this is important. This is important.

Oh, they found... They found... They stole. Who has Mignon shaped? Overall. What was overall that shave? That one was eating something, I think.

I saw it chewing. That's a pretty good sign. Pad tie. Banana lady. Don't suck on the lady. Oh, no. Yeah. could oh yeah I believe in him are they gonna get oh they're gonna get separated oh he wasn't

looking what's that one's is that bob oh no no kevin's the oh actually i help us do whatever you did last time it's back it didn't break for me yeah okay i think hank just broke that time okay great. Fancy's. Wow, they found it. That was quick. I thought that was going to be a huge part of the plot. I thought that was going to be a good third of the movie.

This movie's like rolling right off my brain. I think the banana lady threw him out of the car, but I'm not sure. That's very weird to have something happen that has no purpose for having happened. Well, now they're in fancy. Which I suppose... Yeah, it's just to move them down the street, I think. I guess that's... Hey, there's a minion in here.

When you have characters, you can't talk, you just need them to be shuffled... And you have little balls of piss. You need to shuffle them along from one destination to another, so they can do physical comedy with different objects. They have, they have no, what is that word, authority over their own lives? do they know about mirrors? Do they have self-awareness? Can they pass the mirror test? It doesn't, it seems like they just learned about them, kind of.

They have mirrors in the time of Napoleon. So, this isn't the first mirror that they've seen probably. That one didn't know about mirrors. The other two don't see the past. They don't. Okay, I know this movie was supposed to. to be out piss, but I'm really stuck on their freaking eyes. It

seems like their eyes are really suctioned into those goggles. Yeah, they're sucked forward. Connected more than any human face into a goggle that I've seen. Well, maybe that's an effect of like the refraction of the piss water around their eyeballs. It's true.

Real TV. Battingam. So they can read. They can read. Did he say the dating games? He said batting gam. Uh-huh. We can build a lexicon of the minions, banana and dating games.

The Macer always wanted to be in trolls. I feel like we could get Hank in a minions movie. You just did a pretty good impression. I would have to want that. If you had it, if you had it, you'd want it in retrospect. That's not my experience, actually. Oh, okay. Usually I stop wanting things once I have them.

And then you want the next thing, I suppose. That's right. Oh, wow. Secret. A pirate TV station. Oh. 89 years straight. So that would have started in the 1800s.

Interesting. I wonder why they picked that. They can have these old-timey villains. Mr. Spikey. That's a great name. Guy is a very good name. Yeah. Scarlet Overkill.

Excellent, like, Lady Rock band name. Uh-huh. Yeah, from, like, the early 2000s. Mm-hmm. They would have opened for the hives or something like that. Yeah. Okay.

Well, they found They like that. Oh man, they're going to be such good minions. Makes sense that it would be in Florida. Yeah. Yeah, as a resident Florida expert, how does Orlando Florida feel like Villancon Central? In the year 2020, absolutely.

In the year 1968, like Disney wasn't even open. Disney wasn't even built. Yeah. Yeah. There was nothing there. It was a bunch of oranges. all this empty space

for the bad people to go and no one will try hitting on a fire hydrant yes Hank this will come back I guarantee you that will come back I didn't even notice I think they might all have a sexual fixation on fire hydrants

but see yeah no maybe not is it because they're minion shaped yeah guys you're gonna yeah and they're yellow but you're gonna have to explain to me how minions which definitely are

immortal and don't have sex nonetheless have sexual attraction. Can be sexually fixated on something? Yeah. Do you flirt if you don't, if you are an asexual being? I feel like no. Okay, does like, does like,

so like Bugs Bunny canonically has never had sex, but he flirts with things. Like, does he not have sex? Yeah, but Bugs Bunny is a male bunny. That's true. And also has Bugs Bunny canonically never had sex?

wait has bug i would i don't know yeah i guess so i think he like there's like a robot bunny that maybe he did have sex with so i'll have to think about that well i'll explain that what we mean i can't right now that's not a safe way to drive you've been trying for like 13 seconds my dude you're gonna have to give up a little bit of your control here. What's bothering me is that they serve evil people, but they do not do evil things. Yeah.

They should steal a car, right? Well, do they know how to steal cars? They should. They know how to drive. Probably not. It seems like so far they can only walk. They can swim and walk. Yeah.

Orlando, that's where they want to go. But they understand what cars are is the problem, I think. They understand what cars and boats are. Did Napoleon and cars overlap? No. No. But, yeah, and I guess they were in the woods or in the ice all that time. Right.

So this is all quite new. She has a knife? Look like it. Oh, she's eaten an apple. Yeah. Oh, they're secretly evil. These kids? These people?

The whole family. Look, the baby had a skull on his thing. Yeah, you're right. This is a family of villains. They're going to Villan Con too. Mm-hmm. So you just let him leave your lunchbox behind? He left his bandana, yeah.

Oh, if you're eating apple slices with the seeds in, you're definitely evil. Yep. Boy like creatures. That's something. Much like us, we are. Well, she doesn't know anything more than we do, though. That's true. Like we have more data.

Oh, we were right. Oh, wow. He's got a real gun. He's got a gun. The cat is evil too. Why are they having a problem with this? They shouldn't be, right? No, they're not.

They're just hanging out. No, no, they got no problems. This is great. This is great news for the minions. Absolutely bonkers that they would give that guy a real gun. You don't have to give him a gun. He can rob a bank without a gun. He can pull out the gun where he's inside and we're not watching.

Yeah. A crowbar even, maybe. Yeah. Or it was so. Now he's got a gun. Oh, wait. Yeah, okay, he's got a pink gun. That could have been the gag the first time.

Because you could, yeah, why not that be the gag the first time? Why not just have Nerf guns? America's broken. And this movie is French and everything. What? The minions are French. In what way? This animation company is a French animation company.

Is it? Yeah, I'm going to look at that up and make sure that I'm right. But I think so. Before you blame the French. Is that a real bazooka? Yeah, that's a real bazooka. Yeah. They do have a big variety.

Why do you think we spent so much time with Napoleon, huh? Wow, that's a pretty bad car accident. I just feel like... Well done. I have no idea why I thought it was French. It's not French. I take it all back. Is it because it's from a French word mignon?

That's got to be why. Yeah, these are the filet minions. They have a subsist. And they made the first despicable me, I believe, maybe. The Paris subsidiary made that, okay. Well, good for you. No one thinks. Also spotting that baby skull on the pacifier.

Uh-oh, don't do that. Don't do that. Okay, I have a new prediction for this movie. I think that they're going to want to be. Miss Scarlett's assistant, and then they're going to audition for her and got to go on their adventure, but they're going to circle back around to being this family's assistant. And Gru has, like, weird body proportions and black hair, question like, or dress in black. I think these are, like, Gru's grandparents or something like that. I don't think they're old enough to be Gru's grandparents.

It's 1960. Maybe that boy, the big boys grew. Maybe he is, yeah. Maybe he's two grues on top of each other. Maybe the baby is grew The baby could be grew That could be Oh

Interesting They La Gettys also exist in this universe Okay are they bad guys Is this a splinter faction of minions That's forming? That's definitely not grew No No

Well actually I don't know I don't know anything about grew So it could be There's a kitty Dumo how do you know his name's kevin they can say their names okay i guess so i like that guy just point in kevin they can say kevin dating game and banana banana that's the one you want overkill is your last name okay or alias or whatever her christian name is overkill oh wow

interesting joke for grown-ups Yeah, okay, okay, all right. See, see, look, look. A little bit of Korean. Just the written words for whatever reason. They didn't translate bait shop, though. They don't care to know that bait shop. But I think they pre-supposed your, they like anticipated Orlando not being developed yet.

It is, there were a lot of bait shops in Central Florida when I was growing up, so that's for real. Were there any like this, though, that really, like, sucked you up? I know, that is far as I mean, I think there were probably a lot of bait shops filled with traditionally evil people, maybe. Oh, yeah, I'd say probably Anonymous Progressive folks, at least. Yeah, that's right. Not as progressive. The Rob. What did they do?

I missed it. They exploded. They shot a bazooka. Oh, the minion shot the bazooka? Yeah. Cool. They are evil. The baby could be grew.

They actually did something. The baby could be grew. The baby maybe isn't a huge, huge prediction, Sary, if you get that right. Thank you, thank you. Well, I'm saying that as if I've gotten it right already. I can't wait to see one of these minions' asses, man. I really hope.

Oh. All right. All right. That's a pretty evil guy. Mm-hmm. Yeah. There you. that's not a joke so we're even

yeah what's it gonna be oh very good scary bear I'd say call that a talent okay that's Bob Bob is two eye Mm-hmm Bob is a two-eye color guy helpful writing that down

Write it down like he has this little business card Minions can write if they have a business card Every time he goes to the future He brings his future self back to help him Is that a sustainable? I mean he's living a lot of life right now Yeah

Oh no That guy's really dead crumpled on the ground Yeah that's like We should have been counting the number of murders in this movie Yeah I'll start The T-Rex drag On camera, I guess Dracula dying was...

Dracula died on camera, but he's not a real human. But he's just Dracula. He's just Dracula. Napoleon somehow survived getting shot in the body with a cannonball point blank. Yeah, but we saw the exact moment that that guy's life left his body. Yeah. The scientist. Really harrowing.

The Egyptians are going to really count up the majority of the deaths, I think. Yeah. Absolutely. The crushing under the pyramid. Just like a bunch of paste under there. I'm just going to see that we're a hundred. She's a big deal. She's like the Taylor Swift of.

Oh, wow. She's a rocket ship. Oh. Is it Sandra Bullock? It is. I can tell just from that ah. Oh. I don't know if I could picture her face.

It's a famous person's name. Sandra Bullock? Yeah, Sandra Bullock. Don't worry. Sary's just being Sari over there. I'm not knowing anything about Sandra Bullock. This is for the patrons. You get to see me show my whole ass and how little pop culture I know.

I do get Sandra Bullock confused with who's lady in Ocean's 11? Julia Roberts. Julia Roberts. Very different. Those two mix up in my head a lot. You think they're very different? Yeah, I think they're very different. I think you're right.

Yes. like no obviously not that's another water being he doesn't have goggles for his eyes it's true thank you for pointing that out there i was i was more thinking about the pitch for that joke in the writer's room where they're like we'll have a flipper guy and it'll be like what's the weirdest thing we can think of a man with flippers for hands Mm-hmm. And he can clearly see everyone else around him doesn't have flippers. Yeah.

Yes, and he made it here, crawling out of the Florida swamps. Yeah. Yeah, he's probably a little cool. That's definitely Sandra Bullock. Mm-hmm. Yeah, he couldn't afford the travel for the con, but. Yeah. He was already there, like, next to the bait shop and accidentally got sucked in with someone else, probably.

He's so excited. What? is happening. It's fantasy sequence. It's Kevin's dream. Yeah. Kevin's fantasy is what this part is called. Yeah.

What's happening though? Why is this happening? Oh, he's just eliciting. It just is. He's having a... I thought maybe everybody in the place was having a spellcast on them by Scarlet Overkill and they were all having their own little fantasy and she was going to use it to control the evil people, which

would be double evil. Mm-hmm. But no. All right, all right. That's that's an interesting mechanic. That is. It's a ready audition. Yeah, what about the people in the front row?

Why didn't they go for it? They know that they don't have a chance. Yeah. Look at those people down there. They're just normal looking guys. so there's the villains and then there's the fans of villains that come to this conference apparently Wow so apparently

So Scarlett I didn't actually expecting Scarlett Overkill to be a great Like a super good fighter So that's clearly Oh no This is like the Indiana Jones scene with the diamond And the antidote Where's the diamond?

Oh God, there it is well, she's so expertise. I think she's like a Batman figure. She's got her little dress that is super technology and there's a bud.

But not a minion bud. That doesn't count. Doesn't count. Okay. Minion stayed on the stage somehow. The density of piss in this movie, much like ice blocks, is much higher I think than in our world. I was going to predict this.

Oh, yeah. That the minion has that Ruby right now. Oh, I didn't think it was going to be inside of the minion. Now it's covered in piss. Yeah, it's covered in piss. Surprisingly dry for just coming out of the minion's mouth. kumbaya so they know that word everyone's really happy for them which is nice

that's not what I would expect wow yeah four villains they're very supports death death was there is death really a villain though that's I was having the same thoughts there oh that's

not a good shape What are you talking about the most aerodynamic shape? I don't like that at all. That seems very bad. And the windows And that's also not good to open the window? What?

How high are you? Who's Kevin calling? I don't know. And how do they have an airplane? Oh, calling back at the base. Who knew? They have a phone. I like that.

They had an airplane phones. I actually don't know telecom technology. No. I don't see how they could have done it. Also, how do car phones work? Were they satellite things too? Yeah, we're going to both draw blanks on that, I think, Sam. As much as it's our job to know stuff.

I don't know how the car phones worked. Yeah, especially not while watching the Minions movie commentary and them doing a musical for yeah i'm not sure why for the yetis um i can't think i can't concentrate long enough to fathom a car phone no oh they killed another one that's another death on screen

rigor mortis is setting in they're got to kill all these guys too where they're going are they just upset with themselves because the yeties are okay they can only kill accidentally they can't kill on purpose. No, they, I mean, those police officers, I don't know if all of them made it.

That's a good point. Oh, wow. What? Oh, that's her little house. That's easy to find her, at least. Yeah. Everyone's just too scared to come in and. It's my secret lair.

It's a giant castle in the middle of a field. Okay. Maybe the twist is she's not a real villain. Oh, she's nice. Maybe she's nice. Man. I don't like this. This is the quietest we've all been on.

It was like, oh, there's, like, dialogue. I feel like it's being saying attention. His butt's in there. That doesn't count. Did you see it? I need to see the cheeks. We know, we know it exists. Yeah.

I just, whenever their minions aren't talking funny, the writing is not doing it for me. I had had the same thought. I didn't think I'd be less, less annoyed by the minions. and other characters in the movie. Yeah. I feel like I could have a fair amount of fun writing for a Minion's movie, and I think that I don't feel like anybody had the appropriate amount of fun

while they were working on this one. Would you be bothered by the flagrant disregard of science, or could you put that aside? Oh, I could put that aside for the Minnions movie? I might have been angry about that intro sequence that Mr. represents evolution. But the fact that they have to wear piss goggles is fine with me. You want to have a little aside where they really explain what's going on with their biology, though.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm so curious what the problem is going to be. Yeah. Almost halfway through the movie. Yeah. And we've just made it to, so far they've succeeded. Everything's coming up minions except for killing the Yeti accidentally.

Yeah, everything's coming up, Kevin and Bob and what's his face? I don't know the third one. Steve? Is that what you said, Sam? Huh? Bob? I don't know. Who's the thing?

Kevin, Bob, and somebody. Oh. Almost dead Almost dead No no he would have just frozen like a tardigrade And come back to her Why is that the only one who's cold He could be evil

No Yeah why that's the thing They run a lot from the evil things And I guess They have to find Both an evil thing that likes them enough To keep them around To enjoy it

What doesn't stop a polar bear Is some water Oh no That's kind of funny Why? Why didn't they all go? I guess I'm not understanding that It was not sustainable where they were

Yeah It's not sustainable to animate A couple hundred minions That threw out the whole movie You gotta have some main characters That's a good point The battle scene for the gem Would have been incomprehensible

If 100 minions flooded the stage What's his hand made of? Was his hand like that before? I didn't notice it. I feel like I would have noticed that. Oh. It's good. I like it.

It's a more like a glove. Not his real hand. It's a glove. Yeah, yeah. Not a suit. Wow. Well, it's a lava lamp. It seems like it would be hot to hold.

Yeah. Especially with a glass on a clear. your glass on the outside. Oh. It's his name. Oh. Oh. It's backwards.

He's a chicken. I want to touch that hat. Yeah, for sure. it's uh it's stewart is the other one he said she said it Kevin Stewart and Bob yeah Stuart Stuart Stu Kevin Bob Kevin Bob

Kevin Bob Hmm Ooh I think we're gonna see a butt I think that's the butt Turn around turn around Turn around Kevin you better turn around We want to see her butt

Question is like Will there be cheeks There's an alternative explanation where he actually chopped his ass off And he was just fine because minions are immortal No, we don't see his butt Are we not going to see this dude's butt? This is a long time to remember that the X fell. I can't accept it.

Do you think they cut out the scene where he turned around And the butt cheeks are there because they were like that You can't show a gun, you can show two dead guys But you can definitely not show his like little back flap of his overalls Why are they pigies? What's happening? She's telling him a story. She's telling a big bad wolf story.

He'll be big, yeah. I feel like the other shoes got to drop any second. Is she just, you think they're too, too, what's her problem? I don't know. I feel like there's going to be some twist. Maybe she just dies. Yeah. Do they kill her?

Because they are good at that. Yeah. They're good at killing people. Oh. she's threatening them now yeah I feel like this is consistent with probably villain I don't know how a dinosaur would have threatened them any villain would say the same thing right

yeah yeah look look at Bob he's looking cozy and good yeah he's fine he loved that story so she is bad yeah but that was expected I need a little bit Yeah, that's what I thought would happen. Being bad shouldn't be a problem. No, being bad is what's supposed to happen. They knew Dracula.

He's way scarier than her. They got to get that stuff. I got to get that stuff. Otherwise, they're going to get sluished. They can't even do stairs. Three, please. So they, they speak,

they speak some English. Oh, Sarah was right. Oh, wee. Oh, no. Wow. I didn't expect, I didn't expect to see Minion and boobies and their eyeballs.

Oh, no. This is. Where did the gold bar come from? They stole it from Scarlett's house. Or they borrowed it, I suppose. She had a whole room of gold bars. I think he put one in his pocket or something. Yeah, and his little pouch on the stick.

Wow, that's a pretty complicated little outfit they made. Which is many. They really? The other eyeball is the belt buckle, which I think is a fair amount of genius. You think that's how they decided that two of them had to have two eyes and one of them had to have one eye. Yeah, that must have been that. For the outfits.

When they got to that part, they had to go back. Hypnotize. We're going to have a fight scene? Or you're just going to hypnotize. Or kill him with lava. Nice. That's very stupid. I like it.

Mm-hmm. Let's sing a little song. Oh. Yeah, hell yeah. What song is this? I think it's just his song. You guys, how long do you think this is going to go for? For the last 43 minutes of the show.

Uh-huh. You might see some more butts, Hank. Just not a minion butt. The guys, be careful. Oh, I don't know a lot of time. Even Kevin. Oh, okay. I just don't know.

What's the point of this movie? I think this. We laughed. That's the... I am not really catching a plot. We did laugh, Sarah. I did think that was funny. Yeah.

We did. And they intended it to be funny, so they succeeded. Yeah. I think that the thing that we want is for them to steal the crown jewels. Yeah, but I want him to really hurry it up. I want to know what... So you know what comes next. Yeah.

Whoa. Oh. They're going to kill this guy. This guy does not stand a freaking chance. Yeah. Next time we'll watch it one and a half times. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Oh, nice. Wow. Okay. All right. I should have predicted a nut shot. Why do they have nuts? I guess they do. Oh, no, but doesn't matter.

Okay. Oh. Yeah. Wow. Oh, no. There it goes. They're going to kill this guy. There's no way he's going to be alive after this.

Oh, I thought that was good. We all have the same thought. Is it just going to stick on his head? And they're going to pan up and see this man this covered in blood. You've seen enough death. Yeah. That wouldn't be surprising. Oh.

They're going to meet the queen. They're going to meet the queen. Oh. I didn't think that you could just open it with your fingers like that. Yeah, there's no security. pat or anything. It just looks secure. Yeah. It's the 60s. Oh, my God.

All right. All right. This song's in the public domain. Oh. Oh. He had long legs, too. I thought he only had one long arm. Oh, they paid for this song, though. Cars had the Queen of England in it, too, remember? they all got knighted at the end. Yeah, yeah. And the Pope. And the Pope.

The Popmobile. Yeah. Oh, no. That guy died too. He's okay. He's fine. He's fine. He's fine.

He's fine. He's fine. He's fine. Has Lauren seen this, Hank? No. And he's not going to. It's very violent. Yeah.

And make, just pouring some tea, lovely. That's nice. You guys, I'm so hungry. I really should, like, this really should have in a chip situation. We should have brought bananas. Oh. But you have to walk outside in, like, negative 10 degree weather to get a snack. No.

The other, earlier today, I was like, I need to get a shirt to, for a wardrobe change. And I was like, no, I don't. I'm not going to go my house. It's horrible out there. Ooh, wow. He's good at it. That was another nut shop, by the way.

Mm-hmm. Whole train right to the nuts. That was smart. Nice. Wow, they're really tearing up the streets here. Oh, they just saved the streets here. the queen of England's life. They're going to be heroes.

Maybe that's why they're going to become her enemy because they're heroes by saving the queen's life. She's really horrible. That doesn't look good, actually. That looked like a pretty bad. Oh. Oh, no, nope, that's not it. You know, maybe this doesn't, maybe this doesn't have a twist, you guys. Maybe nothing will happen.

Maybe he'll be going for another. He'll become the king. Is the sword in the stone in the middle of London? No. Okay, is it, it's not real, right? No, I know, it's, I don't think so. He's the savior of England. So maybe Sarah was right.

That was maybe a funny joke. Corblimy. Wow. Yeah, just that's, man, very. This is a twist. He's the king of England now. Yeah, is it? Or is it just going to be?

be, like, reversed in 13 seconds. Oh. Yeah, she's just going to scoop them up. I mean. What's this? Oh, these are the other minions. I thought they were this. Okay.

Yeah, I also was confused for a moment. But there's the, we've never seen this wide guy. There's a lot more round minions in this. Yeah. Oh, they're in Australia, but they're still wearing their big coats because they haven't where were they with the brown bear and the polar bear? They figured it out, Sam. They missed.

Well, yeah, but how did they get to Australia? Well, how are they getting to India, Sam? They're making a bridge out of their own fleshy bodies. Oh, my God. Well, they went to the freaking moon. Oh, wow. Oh, this is, I didn't like that. I didn't like that.

I didn't like that. I didn't like that either. I would say, of the several egregious science things that have been in this movie, that one is maybe the most dangerous of me. It's okay if people kind of forget the little tail pooping out in the beginning. But like, yeah, just go ahead and be like, isn't it funny to apply that the mood landing was faked? Yep. What a gag.

What a goof and a gag. What a goof and a gag. No one actually thinks that. Yeah. Oh, they're dressed like the minions. Okay, it is a twist. It is even the twist that Sam predicted that they would become beloved in England somehow. That's what Sarah said.

Sarah said it. I can't take credit for that. Okay. She'd say Scarlett would be their enemy because they're heroes. This is one thing that I think I'm quite good at. I'm guessing where very simple movies are going to go. Like a child would do. Yeah, like.

So far, two for two of my predictions. That's right. Yeah. We got to see if grew is that baby. That's true. If grew is the baby, I got to be king of the minions. We get to talk about it on the podcast that you're king of the minions. Yeah.

You're already 30 under 30 media luminary. You can't be both. That's his big brain at work. I don't, did they, do they know what it means? Or do they just, not like the nonsense? I don't think so. They didn't understand. King Bob.

They needed King Bob. Okay. He dropped the mic. There was not really enough, like, frames of him holding the mic before he dropped it for it to have the correct impact. That's got a note for the editors Someone's gonna bat I know somebody takes a bath at some point in this movie One of the minions

I better see an ass That's when the butt happens Oh they stole her dogs too Wow that's awful That's awful Oh God I thought that dog was dead I thought I was very scared

What was the most harrowing No Oh there's that counts That counts You don't need to see the hole no release the butthole cut of minions

see oh they brought him he requested the implication is that he requested those and they brought them to him yes yeah

and it's because they look like minions with big boobs I think right is that why no I think it's isn't that just their eye I mean, they don't appear to be attracted to each other. That's what I'm thinking, too.

So they're not horny for each other. Yeah, it's like the ideal minion form is more metallic and bumpy. They don't like the way that they look. They don't like it. Too fleshy. Too smooth. Beauty standards created culturally or not. Uh-huh.

I just really don't care about this lady. No, we were given no reason to. She had a really cool entrance, but then it kind of stopped there. Also, like, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, like, if you pull the thing, oh, do lots. Yeah, I'm king of the laws. I'm king of the laws.

That's what king literally means. What do you think I'm king of? There's a lot of people here milling about. Is this going to get to drink some tea, you guys think? This is a big moment. Probably. That was cute. I guess.

it? Why? The people in the background doing that thing? Yeah, I guess so. The thing was cute. Yeah. Yeah. That would be fun to do with a significant other friend. Yeah, with a close one.

Yeah. Yeah. All right. So what happened? It makes sense that she'd be able to swoop in because she said that she wanted to take it over England. So they abdicated the throne. to her. She is now the queen of England. Okay. Yeah.

And now they want their family to move in with her. Because there's all the space in the... Yeah, and she wants to exploit them, which is what they want. Mm-hmm. How long is this one going to go, do you guys think? She's leading them to their deaths, so not very long.

She's leading them to somewhere where they're going to be trapped. Just this little bathroom? Oh, a dungeon, I think. there's definitely dungeons in the palace right there's gotta be right do you think there must be like a residual dungeon right i would like to be taken to the worst room in buckingham palace like that's what i want to say take it's not gonna look like that's a great that's a great icebreaker for rich people uh maybe is like

go into their house and they're showing off the thing take me to your worst room please though take me your nasty storage room yeah I know what it is for our office. Yeah, me too. Yeah. The organ chamber? No, the boiler room. It's the room behind the boiler room.

Yeah, the room next to the boiler room. Yeah, the cold storage room. Yeah, the cold storage room, yeah. I bet the dungeon in Westminster Abbey has like Commodore 64 stored in it or something, just like old Macintosh computers, you know. I don't understand why she doesn't like them. They did the, they did the, she seemed to like them. But like now that they've done the work, like it's not like they're about a threat to her.

No. Oh. Yeah. Immoral. All right. Interesting. Interesting. We're learning some physiology right now.

They don't have bones. They don't have bones, which is consistent with piss in a sack. Mm-hmm. If they're just like a thick rubber membrane, yeah? Yep. All right, all right. This is actually the most useful scene in the movie for us so far. Absolutely.

He's trying to kill them, and so we can see exactly how they're immortal, how their body is squish and stretch. This doesn't answer anything about their piss, though. Why? Oh. Oh, now they're buds. Now they're having fun. They were like, we can't try the axes. We can't try the sword or anything.

Herb overkill. They're married? I guess. Huh. I really don't like that guy. That was a bad joke. Yeah. I liked the evil family better.

I wish they'd stayed with them. Well, maybe they'll come back and it'll be grew. And it'll be grew. Maybe you're right. I don't I don't really feel it but yes I don't know if the writers of this movie had that much like foreshadowing thought yeah like they were just they were the vehicle to get them to Orlando yeah I have I like the hair I think it's the hair I think It's cool. I think it's interesting. I'm trying to decide if I like it or not.

Yeah. I like the bangs. Mm-hmm. The side pony maybe is what's not doing it for me. Yeah. Why does he look so British but isn't British? I, that's what's maybe hanging me up about him. Is that why she got married to him?

Because she... It's because she... Because it had to be John Hamm, so they need to... Yeah, they were trial ran all the actors, and all the British actors were like, I won't participate in this, actually. What is the plot of it? Yeah, I don't have... Like, they could definitely...

I'm not worried that they couldn't... I'm not sure there's been a real British person in the entire movie. They all are refused to participate because it's too disrespectful. what's down there I don't how they escape they can go even deeper now they can go to the second dungeon

the sub dungeon it just goes to the sewer big bin you know how the sewer has all the signs that shows you exactly where things go and it just says God save the queen on the wall sometimes

sure and it goes into your heating Oh yeah It definitely goes into people's living rooms That we labeled

Whatever that said Sorry Sorry Oh they took it And they took it They have no respect For anything Sorry for your loss

Oh okay It was important They can definitely Right Scarlet And there's And there's a bee down there

Yeah This movie's coming off the rails I think Garlet is allergic to bees and is going to get stung by the bees. And die. I think you're probably right. Yeah, I guess we have to get to her deaths at some point.

There's no way she's not going to do. Oh, my God. I hate this movie. You know, I have a reoccurring dream where my fingers get chopped off by a manhole cover. So this movie is really affecting me deeply. Okay, they changed. She changed the hair. Huh.

She didn't change the hair. Was it in progress, perhaps? Well, yeah, I don't like that. She looked better before. Yeah. That's probably why I have the dream, Tina. Okay. There they are.

They're back. They made it in England. Who are they? They just are a fan of villains. I don't know how they made it to the coronation. There's villains. I think all the, yeah, all the villains are. They probably took a plane, Sarah.

That's how they made it. That's how they got there. That's true. And the... Oh, my gosh. This is how history gets rewritten, you guys. Somebody finds this file in like 500 years. They're like, look at how they lived in the 60s.

You're like, these boneless creatures just aren't in the fall of the record anywhere. Full of piss. Oh. I feel like I don't know anything about these three guys. Bob really likes collecting things. Yeah, he loves his teddy bear. He is pretty. Why are we?

I don't know. We're just honoring him. Yeah, we can't tap down the leg side. Why did that just happen? Because he had to leave a rat for some reason. Yeah. I don't know. I think he's thinking the rapper is service.

There's a what. There's what. There's a lot. There's a lot. Oh, my God. I really need him to get drunk now. Well, juicy chunks right there. They don't have a lot of time left, Hank.

I don't know. We got like a third of the movie left for the big drunk. How could that be possible? What else could happen in the movie? So much. All right. The bee's back. Oh.

Is that the only reason we had the bee just so he could punch him? No, it can't be Don't kill the bee It's just a bee It's a nice bee Minions are scared of bees Yeah, they're scared of bees We got that

All right, so the bee was important It did have a plot need Oh Maybe the bee will kill her in a different way Yeah Oh no Is she just going to be straight up smooshed? What about her husband?

He'll be so sad They're screwing it back in Now screwing it back in No, no, yeah. Okay, I think this gag's kind of funny. A classic screw-unscrew gag. Also, is that why? Is that how chandeliers are up there?

Yeah, they really screw them in. That's how it works. Uh-oh, uh-oh, that's also bad. Yeah, his foot is the only thing holding it up. I just don't feel like she deserves death. Given. She escaped. She's got to escape.

She's going to, her dress is going to come up, I feel like. It's too early. She got saved by our dress. Mm-hmm. I think that, I don't think that lifting's going to help you guys. I think it'll just make you see things you can't unsee. Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, wow. Oh, but now she thinks the menus tried to do it. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, all right. Classic misunderstanding. Classic. like how do you even pitch what the story is he's a fan he's on their side you send in the screenplay

you know you say the minions accidentally become the king of england yeah ladies mad at them i mean if you pitch me that i'm actually i'm actually like yeah that sounds good it sounds better than this honestly i like it better as a concept than the execution that guy's really scary that's quite scary why is he in there what the heck he's a chain they were like just villain just villains yeah that's broken we've got chainsaw mime uh lasso man lasso man the mole okay gotta have a mole person gotta have a mole man oh he's like a i don't like a soviet era mole man yeah okay killer clown guy I do like when you get to see all the crazy villains.

That's fun. He's got watermelon pants. He's got watermelon pants. Oh. Dumo. Yeah, Dumo, yeah. Well, they know the word tortilla, too? Yeah.

I think they know all the words. I think they know all the words. Okay, I'll stop counting words then. Yeah, like, I think they know all the words. They just don't know. Uh, grammar. Mm-hmm. And they choose to speak in Minion.

Yeah, they're speaking their own language. Remember, there's a whole guy. Yeah, with Finns. Yeah, a Finn guy. That's a deep puddle. It is must lead straight to the sewers or something. Yeah. You ever seen that video where the guy, like, jumps in the puddle in the parking lot and

he just, like, goes all the way in? It was like a vine from way back when. Remember that? I bet I have. All right. They made it. Just in time to save their friends. The guys are all here.

Still in their coats. Via India. I just think the people making this movie didn't know that polar bears didn't live in Antarctica. Wait, what's the down one? Antarctica. Yeah. Yep. And I think that, I think that, yeah,

polar Brits don't live in Antarctica. Were they in Antarctica? Well, they went to Australia. They did go to Australia first. They just went to. It's very hard to get from the Arctic to Australia. Another, another inaccuracy discovered. Another dangerous inaccuracy.

We are poking holes right in Minions, 24vian. We got half We got like 20 minutes left We need to figure out How this movie is going to end Predictions Well they're going to stop I mean all that's going to happen

Is they're going to stop her That's got to end She was going to show up at the end of this movie Definitely Yeah and it's the fact that it's 1968 Like Gru would be A baby in 1968

Yeah that adds up And that family has his friends. They're still fans of the minions. They want them safe. So they'll help somehow. Yeah. They'll probably come back and help.

Yeah. Oh. Was that there the whole time? Wow. I can see the actor really performing that line into the microphone there. there he is that was like take seven you know

get a little bit more grimy in your throat please I liked that I got like a Duke ducum guy these guys are my favorite part yeah that sort of like menagerie of villains

yeah it'd be fun to come up with like 200 bad guys mm-hmm What's he in? What did he just get in? I don't know, but he left everything. He went here and grabbed. He could have brought it with them in a little.

She showed this thing to them earlier, but we weren't listening when she said what it was. Yeah. Oh, boy. Something in progress. Do not blow. That's pretty good. That was pretty funny.

That was the funniest part of it. on this banana. Oh, it's an opposite of a shrink ray. Uh-huh. It's the opposite of a shrink ray. Yeah, it's a blow-up. What would you call it?

I don't know. Yeah, it's a good girl thing. A blow-up ball. A big. And why would you make that a chamber you got into and had to force your way out of by growing? It's not, it's, you know, form follows function. Clear notes.

Yeah. Clear notes. Do not push the lever. Do not blow in the hole. Yeah. Oh. Huh. It doesn't seem like something Scarlett would do, but what do I know?

Make herself. I'm surprised she hasn't noticed yet, because it is pretty big, and the castle was visible down the road. Yeah. She's going. Well, she stayed up all night. She's really tired. Yeah, she's going crazy, it seems like. She's really losing touch.

Yeah. What'd you get? What is that? You stuck between some townhouses? It's going to be hard to get around. Didn't you get the memo that these things are invincible? Yeah, he tried to kill them. And you should have said something to her.

All right, all right. There's only one London. Yeah, there's a lot of extra destruction. Wow. That was weird. Why didn't that happen? Why? Yeah.

He wasn't even that close. Yeah. Just so specific about the lady putting your lipstick on. Mm-hmm. It seemed like somebody's predilection. Yeah. Yeah. Uh-oh.

He's got to rip off the part of the thing with all the palms on it. He's going to blow them out. yeah so is it just is it just a boss battle here at the end yeah i guess so is that piss is that piss it is oh it is it not it's a fake out

we got a piss joke they knew we were going to watch this movie but not a sexy fire hydrant no just right no Oh, they're just having... That's cute. That's cute. They knew Kevin by his feet.

By his foot. Yeah. Maybe it's a fan on thing. Yeah, when Kevin is nearby. Do we see them find out that they were in one? Yeah, he's okay. He wouldn't have been killed even if he had hit the ground. I mean, minions can definitely fall

from an infinite height. Absolutely. And just bounce. I wonder how many shoot days this was for Sandra Bullock. I mean, if I was bringing her in, I think I would tell her I could do this all in one day. I bet. One kind of long day. Uh-huh.

Trust me, Sandy, you're not going to have to redo too many lines. not going to be You're a professional And we also don't care Mostly that But it's probably fun You know Yeah

Ow Ow Ow Ow Oh Mm-hmm Mm-hmm Tony

Tom Tony Oh, that's cute. Oh. What do you think was going to happen, bud? What is? Is that the piss? That's the piss, I think.

It looks like saliva, but lest you be fooled. Oh, my God. Why did he put the minion in his mouth just for that humor scene? I think he actually smooched him too hard. He smooched so hard he sucked. Yeah. What, dude. Yeah, I knew it

You're fine Yeah Oh, he's got Do the olive shoes I didn't even notice Yeah, they do They have shoes and gloves And I don't know where they got

Either of those things Mm-hmm Yeah, the gloves Weren't hanging on the line Oh, eat it No, they're too strong for that Embescent Yeah

It's gonna eat her too Oh, wow He's suddenly became very fast. Is he going to put her in his mouth also? Oh, wow. Maybe. What's the plan?

No. Did he die? There's no way. Is that, was he, is he like, did he Iron Man himself just now? Or maybe he'll rain down as several other Kevins. So many Kevins. That's the new generation of Minnie. That's how they breed.

Yeah. Oh. Oh, even the rat is sad. Did I miss that he, like, swapped out his teddy bear for a rat? I think she stole his teddy bear. And now I believe it's exploded. Okay. He found the rat in the sewer.

Maybe the teddy bear will come flying out of the sky and land in front of him. Problem. He's in his giant pants. He's just become small again. But, more, but, more, but more. But, more, but, oh, he's wearing underpants. He's wearing underwear. What the heck?

That's not allowed. That's never been the case before. Yeah, where did they get those? They're free-balling it in those things. And they stink. Okay, that's funny. This is funny. I like this.

That's a good joke. That's for me. And you got the teddy bear. You did get the teddy bear. Few. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

So, yes, Kevin indestructible, naturally. But that just implies that all the extra enlarged piss just vaporized into the air. It was destroyed. The matter was destroyed. Part of the pods. Yeah. That the piss out. So he's now a normal-sized minion again.

The Queen of England doesn't have anything to thank these guys for. Yeah. they got them into this jam they would have if she hadn't turned on them they would have delivered the country to Scarlett Overgay yeah they wanted that to happen

they should be in jail but look sometimes you got to heal instead of instead of trying to blame sometimes you have to heal into visions yeah she got a break she got to hang out in the pub

do some arm wrestling yeah maybe she liked it Was she doing that? Does I miss that? Yeah. Yeah. This whole scene. I don't know. I can't, this movie is, like, I can't watch this movie.

There's something about it. It's not going into my head. It's very quiet in our ears, and we are very loud. Is that? They didn't help at all. They just are incidental. It's totally true. Even if it's not grew, it's grew.

Bogob It's the 60s Those are new That's a Grasias, okay Oh, what are you going to get For real, the sword? Kevin are friends

Yeah Oh Oh, guitar Super mega Ukelele. Yeah, hell yeah. Oh, this is going to be the closing song of the movie. It's got to be.

No, never mind. Yeah, it would be the closing song for like 20 minutes. Yeah, I looked at the timestamp. And then I saw her face. Now I'm a believer. They love it. They love it. They love it.

He's revolutionizing. Something. Oh, fuck, dude. Queen gave you that. Bowglob. What the first guy get? A crown? What if they had Italian accents,

but also spoken minion? I mean, that's kind of. That's kind of just Italian. That's kind of what they're doing. What? Yeah. Fine. He just gets knighted?

Yeah. She got knighted. And the first guy got a golden crown, I think, right? Yeah. For his teddy bear, yeah. Oh, just for his. He's a, he's a knight. And they all have overalls.

They were all outfitted. Yeah, yeah. They got them all overalls. Wow. The pockets are all, like, have identical wear on them. They didn't even, like, do different. textures for the different overalls. Even for the main three guys.

Yeah. Crew, crew, crew, crew, crew, crew, grew, grew, grew, grew, grew, grew, grew. Where's grew? Baby grew. Baby grew. Oh, no, she's alive. She's alive. After being grabbed and exploded.

Exploded. I think they're all, they're still on her side. oh here's grew here's grew here's grew here's grew here's grew here's grew i betcha how do you i bet you anything there we go oh he's just some random guy he's a different baby This is like Okay This I don't, this is like Palpatine coming back at the end

It's just like somehow Palpatine came back Like you could have to give me a twist Not just like he appears He's just there with the Why doesn't anybody stop him? He's a child. Yeah. They have weapons and stuff.

Oh, wow. Does Gru have the crown of England in the movies or what? I don't know. Yeah, but he doesn't like show it off, you know. Tuna Root. He's a humble man. Gru X Machina, which I think is pretty good. Uh-huh.

Just, well, they're cowards. They could have made it the baby that's been here the whole time. But I guess he didn't have the big grunos. Yeah. He needed to have like a little grunose. So it would be like, is it or is it not? Mm-hmm. You're still King of the Minions, Sari.

Thank you. Sam can have that title. What is it? Sorry. King of the Minions. I don't want to be King of the Minions. Even better. Let's make Tuna King of the Minions or something.

Yeah, series, 30 under 30 education luminary, and you're a resident every man in King of the Minions, Sam. Okay, fine. I'll take it. So really, the origin of the minions had nothing to do with the Gru. Like, we didn't tee up grew at all. He just appeared. No, no. We just experienced.

The origin of the minions was weird evolution. And they, like, happened through an alternate. form of natural selection that we don't understand and they were at least around 65 million years ago and there they're immortal and he has a banana so they're really into it now yep they're ready to lick and suck that banana this guy's still that guy's been wearing the same clothes for millions of years oh man aren't you glad that you're a patron patron of sysho tangents. Yeah, I think you've posted the number at some, it's like, we've got over 900 now.

No. So really way beyond the goal that we set to, uh, to record this commentary, 959. Is that right? Wow. That's an incredible number of people and you've waited so patiently for this Minion's commentary. We teased it for a long time. And I don't think it was, the movie wasn't. good.

The movie was bad. I don't think that we were expecting it to be great, but I did expect it to be better than that. Like, I was kind of looking forward to it. And really, the thing that I liked was that I was watching it with you guys. Yeah. I love an excuse to hang out with my friends for like two hours. Yeah. Yeah.

That part was nice. This movie was offensively about nothing at all. And I didn't learn anything about the minions. And... We learned a little bit about the minions. They had the goggles from the beginning. So, like, that's either a part of their body or a necessary part of them being on land. And we learned that they are very, very, that they are immortal and invincible.

Yeah. And so all of their fear, like, they're very afraid for beings that have never witnessed a death. But here's a proposal for you. If they get eaten by the bear, then they have to live through being pooped out by the bear. So they don't want that to happen. That's scary. That would be, I wouldn't want that. That would be unfortunate.

But there were like so many times in this movie where the plot would have been perfectly fine if they had been lost in New York, if they had been at Villancon the whole time. If they had, they didn't have to go to England and screw around in England with John Hamm and Sandra Bullock. Or they could have just started there. And also there were a lot of jokes that were like, this is a thing. Like the Beatles existed. That's the joke Well, the Beatles existed The moon landing didn't

The moon landing was definitely British people drink tea It's like wow That's a You really have to be like Deep American to be like Ah, I got that reference Yes

Even though Orlando joke too Of like oh Florida before Disney Was swamp They did get that I mean that one's fun Bates shops I think that one's I think that was fine. Because like you do

sort of think of Orlando as being a thing. And in 1960 whatever it was. And it was 1968. So they were definitely filming the fake moon landing. Like that's what was happening. Yeah.

That's the only reason they picked the year in 1968, basically. So they could make... Yeah, what do you think came first? Moon landing was fake joke. It makes me think I can trust nothing else about this movie. And a boomer soundtrack.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Tuna points out a tremendously boomer soundtrack. Yeah. Did you see the Mario movie? Yes. The same. That was the same people. Also boomer soundtrack.

And that one, too. Maybe that was, yeah, boomer. That was boomer, I guess. Yeah, they're going to keep, please. Like, you know what the problem is that in like 10, 20 years from now, it's going to be movies like this, because it's going to be like Green Day. And I'm going to be like, oh, I'm, dying.

Have you watched that show? The show on Apple TV where the... Minions of a down, tuna-typed. The show on Apple TV where it's like alternate reality space program, what's that show called? For All Mankind, have you seen that show?

No. Oh, okay. Well, now, so it's like, it starts in the 60s, but now it's up to the 2000s, and it's like a period piece, and they're playing, like, the strokes, and they're playing, like,

the first guerrillas album and stuff, And it's like, it's making me feel like I am on death store for sure. Yeah. I want to point out that they ended the Minions movie with they call me Mellow Yellow. Yeah. Which I think is they are self-aware about the piss. Oh. Is that song about piss?

No. Okay. But it could be. Like you see the link Yep, I definitely see the link See the link And you also see the slightly more surface level link of they're just yellow guys

And I think if we say it enough times In a future Minions movie Someone will say Are you that way because of all the P inside of you? Or like when we'll get like poked by a fork And like some P will come out of its side And they'll be like Oh, you're just full of piss and like, how about the quake-a-pac-a-pac.

Yep. Slap a Band-Aid on and never talk about it again. Sure. Do you think that they wrote in the script, the minions say, and then they like write down in Minlish? I bet they say. No. I don't know. Yeah.

I bet they had to. I wonder who voices the minions. I don't know that. I've never. I don't know. But I bet they had to so the person would know what silly. thing to say. Pierre Coffin is Kevin.

See? I told you at the beginning. Isn't he one of the directors? I think so. I thought I saw that name prominently. He's been living, breathing, dreaming about minions his whole life, so only he can voice them. And you know what? He's been living and breathing. Piss.

He's been living, dream, and breathing it all the way that damn bank, too. He did a great job inventing these guys. It's true. He's the guy we need to get on the show to be like, settle it once and for all. What's inside of these little guys? I had a horrible thought just now. We did disprove one of our theories because Gru was smart before he smelled all the minion piss. Because he made the freeze ray in the motorcycle. Before he ever met a minion.

I guess we did learn a lot more from this movie. I still think that if you sniff the minion piss, it could give you some powers, though. I think so, too. I could only make you smarter. really. Maybe he just got it. It couldn't hurt. Yeah. The last time I got, I did a urine sample at the, at the lab.

My doctor did take a little whiff before he took to the lab just to be sure. And that's why he's a doctor because he's doing that all the time. And then he did just a little sip, too, just to see. Don't be smart to your doctor. And if your doctor isn't doing that. that you've got to ask them to make sure they're doing the test correctly. That's right. That's right.

He held it up to the light and then he gave it a little sniff and then he took a little paste and he's like, you don't have a UTI. And that was it. Oh. Oh, boy. That's why this is at the end of the Minion's commentary, so people hopefully don't hear that. Yeah. Now we can cut stuff out. out too because we're you know we don't have to you can't know you can't cut out from the

middle no not from the middle only the end only the end oh okay thank you all so much for taking the time to spend the little time with us and also uh taking them out to spend time with us on syshow tangents regularly a delightful part of the week for you hopefully and definitely for us and for being a patron y'all are great we really love that support That means a lot. Yes, thank you. It's on. Piss on.

Piss on.