Secret Mum Club with Sophiena - The Car Park Panic

Episode Date: November 21, 2024

This week’s extra secret has the ladies diving into some truly unforgettable (and slightly traumatic) moments, from leaving babies behind in car parks to being left behind on holiday! Plus, there’s a brand-new potty training anthem that’ll be stuck in your head for weeks. Don’t say we didn’t warn you! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Calling all music buffs. Hey, hey, turn the volume up, yeah? Make Me A Mix Tape is back. I'm Jordan Stevens. I'm Clara Ampho, and this is our weekly music show. A celebrity guest picks the theme. We select the tunes. And we battle it out to create the ultimate mix tape.

May the best music lover win. Oh, it's about to go down. Let's go! Make Me A mixtape. Listen only on BBC Sounds. ["Secret Mom Club"] Hello, this is the Secret Mom Club. I'm Safina.

And I'm Emma. And welcome to your Thursdays episode. Where we get to squeeze in all the extra bits and bobs from the week. All of your comments, thoughts, questions and fun stories to keep you going through the weekend. Shall we jump on in? Shall we? Shall we jump on in? And it's time for another Correspondence Corner. So Emma, let's have number one. This one is from Carly in Kansas City.

She just flew in from Kansas City. She told us she was pregnant. I was thinking, well, after 18 months of trying, after she listened to her first Sunday, so as an expecting first time mom, she says, hello, it was amazing hearing your kind words when you read my email. You ladies feel like big sisters. Oh, stop it. Giving me advice and making me laugh

through lots of hormone induced tears. I wanted to give you an update. I'm now almost 17 weeks along and thriving in pregnancy. We finally told our families and friends and everyone is absolutely thrilled. This will be the first grandbaby on both sides. Oh! Prepare to be spoiled.

I feel so lucky to have had minimal symptoms and I'm just starting to show. There's so much I'm excited and a little terrified about, but I'm so grateful to have you two to help me through this phase of life. Oh, Carly. Carly, massive congratulations. I mean, she's not even halfway.

I mean, not to make you feel like you've got ages to go, but not even halfway yet. 17 weeks. 17 weeks. That's phenomenal. Not long, that's gonna fly past. Yeah've got ages to go, but not even halfway yet. 17 weeks. 17 weeks. That's phenomenal. Not long, that's going to fly past. Yeah, it will. Oh, imagine now she's showing right on top of Christmas too.

Oh, little bum. A little bum. And you'll start feeling Kingston probably. Oh, you can get your eating pants on as well. Oh my gosh. I loved being pregnant at Christmas, did you? Oh, such a joy. I thought I would miss not drinking, but actually I just made up for it with the food.

Yes, I did. I loved it. How delightful. Thank you for sharing that with us. That's so incredibly, so incredibly kind, isn't it? Can't wait for more updates. We need to know about the whole process. Are you finding out the gender? I was just about to say, are you gonna find out the gender?

I wonder if that's the same in America, whether they do it at the 20 week scan or whether you can do it before. Cause you can find out before from a blood test, can't you? I feel like, yeah, I feel like in America, you can find out a lot earlier than us, but don't quote me on that. I might be completely wrong.

Because I think it's quite unusual in the NHS in the UK that you only get your two scans, if you're a standard pregnancy, don't you? I was gonna say, does anybody know this, that it's from America or anywhere else, that we only have two scans? Yeah, 12 weeks. 12s and 20 weeks. And a 20 is when you can find out your gender.

But we should be very grateful because that is free. Oh yeah. And I know in America you do have to pay. Yeah. Yes. But I think I've got a feeling because my best friend, Tabitha, she's American. And I think I've got a feeling you get more,

you see your- Is it the gynecologist? Is it the gynecologist? Or obstetrician or whatever. You see them more in your pregnancy, you see your, um, is it the gynecologist or obstetrician or whatever? You see them more in your pregnancy, I think. Wow. I mean, yeah, that is phenomenal. Isn't it? Yeah. Thank you for being here. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you for being here. Thank you for being our little sister. Yeah. Little Susie. Can't wait to be an auntie. No pressure. If it's a girl, Safina's a great, yeah. Safina Emma has got a lovely ring to it. Emma Safina? Safina Emma?

I don't think either go. Either way. One last message here it says, but Safina first. Okay. One last message says, Hi ladies, after listening to the DMV diaries, I remembered a story. I've worked as an au pair around the world and I'm now a nursery school teacher. During all my years of potty training, there's one song I always go back to and it's one of the funniest and most helpful songs I've found. You can play or watch it on YouTube and I hope it gives you and other mums a good laugh too. Oh my gosh, have we got it so far?

We have a link here. Should we click it? Click on this? Are you ready? Yeah. Should I put it near my mouth? Yeah. This mouth.

As close as possible. Okay, ready? Three, two, one. I don't know if we should continue that. I just come up with the little banjo in the toilet. Don't be afraid of the big white bowl. I need to start saying that to Joseph. That's gone from Little Red Riding Hood, hasn't it? Don't be afraid of the big bad wolf. The big white bowl. Poop poo, poop poo, everybody has to go poop poo, poop poo, poo poo, all day long. All day long? I hope they don't shit all day. That's a right ring of stinger. You should be worried about that.

If you're pooing all day long, you should be. That's very catchy though, isn't it? You should go to the doctor. Yeah, I love that. I love that. That's a good one. Poo poo, poo poo, everybody's gotta go poo poo. I adopted one again, second shout out from my friend Tabitha

that they used to sing for her baby brother when they were potty training him when he was little. And it was, you can use whatever name, but his name was Seth. So he used to go, Seth is going pee pee on the party. You know that song, soon wedding bells are gonna chime. Do you know that one? We're getting married in the morning. So to that tune, I did that

a lot with Joseph. Joseph's going pee pee on the party. So I used that one quite a lot. What was the next line? I want to know where you were going with that. Joseph's going pee pee on the party. Do you know what the next bit is? Maybe he could go. Every day he's weeing on the loo. Sometimes it's gonna be a poo. I don't know how you would rhyme with that though. That's a tough one. You've set yourself a right challenge there. You don't have to rhyme the first and second lines. It just has to go. It always has to rhyme in our house.

Oh, it just has to go to the tune of We're Getting Married in the Morning. A peep peep and the putty. A peep peep and the putty. There's also one in Peppa Pig in the potty training episode, which is the magic word is potty. And when you need to go, it's a really bad song. It doesn't rhyme.

It goes, you just say potty. The magic word is noty and when you need to go. It's a really bad song, it doesn't rhyme. It goes, you just say potty, the magic word is. No. Potty. Oh. Yeah, Daddy Pig. It's a shit song, Daddy Pig. But we use that one a lot for Joseph as well. I got to have it rhyming. I'm a sucker for a good rhyming book. Me too.

I really, really love it when it rhymes. I do, I love it, I love a poem. Sometimes when it does it and it doesn't rhyme, I'm like, I can't fuck this book. Yeah, I can't follow this. I can't, yeah, I can't, if it's not gonna rhyme, doesn't fit the vibe. I mean, even some like award winning poetry,

if it doesn't rhyme, I'm like, shit, it's rubbish. Get it off. It's award winning. I'm not interested. It's in some high state of a museum. Yeah, it'd be like winning like poetry awards. Of course it doesn't rhyme. Yeah, it's shit. I feel like that's us, are we uncultured?

Yeah. Is it uncultured, is that the word? Yeah, that's us being sick, I think. Un't rhyme. Yeah, it's shit. I feel like that's us. Are we uncultured? Yeah. Is it uncultured? Is that the word? Yeah, that's us being sick, I think. Uneducated. Yeah. Glad we're together on that one. Yes.

We are together on that. Yeah. Because you are well educated. No, no. You went to university. No, well. Yeah, I didn't. I love a Potty Training song though, so thank you.

That's with love from South Africa. Thank you. And anonymous. From anonymous. Very anonymous. Yeah. But we appreciate you. So thank you for all of your messages this week. If you have any comments, thoughts or fun stories, why not get in touch? Email us hello at secretmumpod.com or with Secret Mumpod on TikTok and Instagram.

And next is time for one of your story. It's not as a secret. Well, it's like a story secret, isn't it? Yeah. Secret story. Secret. Secret. Secret. Calling all music buffs. Hey, hey, turn the volume up, yeah? Make Me A Mix Tape is back.

I'm Jordan Stevens. I'm Clara Ampho and this is our weekly music show. A celebrity guest picks the theme. We select the tunes. And we battle it out to create the ultimate mixtape. May the best music lover win. Oh, it's about to go down. Let's go!

Make me a mixtape. Listen only on BBC Sounds. Welcome back. We love a secret on the Secret Mum Club. You're all so good at sharing. So Emma, what have you got for us today? Alright, this comes from Emily. Hello Emily. She says, Hey ladies, I took my little one to nursery completely exhausted, barely awake myself and just focused on getting him in and settled. My girl.

I grabbed the pram on my way out and loaded it into the car. Well, I got home and went to pull the pram out only to realize I'd grabbed someone else's pram. Nightmare. So I spent the whole drive home essentially kidnapping someone else's stroller. At least there wasn't a kid in it. At least there was no baby in it. I had to go back to the nursery and explain myself to the staff and pretend like I was laughing and not dying of embarrassment. Love the podcast ladies. Thanks for the laughs, Emily. That is absolutely hilarious.

That's the kind of thing I would do. I've left the stroller sometimes. Left it there. Because you load everybody into the car and you get in the car and I've left the stroller there. Yes. We had a moment the other day actually. I feel like that's a real common one.

That is. Where my fear is driving off and just leaving it. And I actually think because it's very rare for me to be on an outing with Stefan, we went out the other day and we were all bundling all the kids into the car. I'm like, I'll do Sadie, you do Joseph, double buggy on the side of the road.

Obviously that needs loading into the boot. But normally when I'm on my own, I have this checklist in my mind because I'm doing it all myself. It's fine, I'll be like, put Sadie in, put Joseph in, put the buggy in, bags in, everyone's ready to go, let's go. Because I was leaving Stefan to do it. I was like, we were like more than halfway home and I was like, okay, we've got both the kids. Looked in the boot, I couldn't

see the double buggy. And I just had this moment of panic that we just left it on the side of the street. And I went to him, I was thinking, this would never fucking happen if I was on my own. I would have bloody done it. I would have been like, get the buggy. I said, did you put the buggy in the boot? And he went, oh, yeah, I did. Yeah. He went, don't worry about it. I thought for a moment I was about to punch you in the head. But no, it really did remember it. But so your worst nightmare stuff like that, isn't it? You think it's just a moment of like a lapse in concentration and your whole day is like, it's just another bit of bloody admin. I got to deal with.

I was actually talking about this because little secret from me, I've actually made real life friends and you'll never believe where I've made them. Where? At football. No, football mums. I've got football mum friends.

Wow. And we just stand, we've even got a WhatsApp group. Have you? And we've been giving, we're basically doing, instead of book club, film club. Right. So we're watching recommended stuff. of book club, film club. Right. So we're watching recommended stuff. And then chatting about it together.

And then chatting about it together. How many people in the club? There's four. That's, I've never been in a group of girls before. I've never been in a club. I'm not in a mom club. In the club. I'm in this mom club, but I'm not in like a mom club outside.

If that sound, I feel like all I keep saying is, we're in the club. We're in the club. We're all fam. In the club, we're is we're in the club. We're in the club. We're all family. In the club. We're all family. In the club.

We're all family. Tick tock. Yeah. Don't know what you're talking about. That's me. I've got a group of girls, three other moms, and I'm just elated about it. I'm not going to lie to you. I feel like it should have been my whole secret.

It's going to be my whole personality. Yeah. New personality. So we were talking about football the other night about how many times we've left the stroll on the side of the road. And have people done it? Do you wanna know something I did really, really bad?

Never shared this with anybody before in my whole entire life. I was gonna take it to the grave, but this is a safe space for us to share our secrets. I had to get a lot out then very quickly. I actually left Colby in the car seat. Did you? Didn't leave the car. Well, I got in the car seat. Did you? Didn't leave the car. Well, I got in the car, thought I'd put him in

and I'd left him on the pavement next to the car. So I reversed the car out, went to leave the car park, looked back, realized the car seat was there. He was in it. Reversed and I'd left him in the car seat. You almost drove off without him. There was a lady stood next to him, obviously watching me, but she just stood, you know,

she had no right to have to tell me it was me that forgot my baby. Like she didn't wave or anything like wave me down or anything like that. What did she think you were doing? I don't know. I thought she maybe it was going to be an episode of Baloo at Bloody Jungle Book. Was she going to take him on Tarzan, raise him herself? I don't know. Raise him as her own? And I just sort of come back and I was like, I am. I meant to do that. Nothing to see here.

I've literally never ever told anybody that I was going to take him. I cried for fucking You must have felt so bad. I literally feel physically sick about it now. Like it brings sick to the back of my throat. It's the most horrifying and I just, I was so sleep deprived. I was so, I just was not in the right head space. And this is what, when people say to me, you shouldn't go sleep with your baby. You know, if it's more important for your baby to sleep.

Do you know what the most dangerous thing is a sleep deprived parent, because that, it just spirals from there. It's the most unsafe thing for a mom or dad. And the things you do when you're sleep deprived or the things you can't do, like you can't function. I would like to say though, I didn't actually leave the car park.

I reversed out of the bay, went forward, reversed back for a split memento. He was fine. To be fair, someone could have picked him up and could have ran with him. Yes, it was neglectful. Yes, I have never, ever done it. It's an easy mistake to make, but once you do that once, you'll never do it again. I've never, Yes, it was neglectful. Yes, I have never ever done it. It's an easy mistake to make.

But once you do that once, you'll never do it again. Never, I've never ever, ever done it again. Never again in my whole entire life. I cannot tell you. It's my constant fear is losing a child. I just don't know where my head was at. It was absolutely fucking terrifying. Because you've got a million and one things on your plate

all the time as a parent, isn't it? But now, I would think now I would be more forgetful with things, but I'm actually now three children deep and I'm actually. Well, you've had a bit of bloody practice. I'm on it. You're getting used to it. Yeah. That's part of the reason why I won't have three children though.

I can't be outnumbered. I think what made it worse is because Colby used to cry a lot. I think because he'd fall into sleep while we were walking around the shop. So I put the car seat. Normally I took the car seat off of the wheels and would put him straight in the car because I used to be so embarrassed about him crying. I used to take him off of the wheels,

put him in the car and shut the car and hope that no one could hear my baby crying because I'd already been around the whole shop with him crying, you know? So I think I took him off of the wheels and because he was quiet, I put the wheels in the car, shut the boot, because that was out of practice for me.

I'd normally take him off, put him in the car, put the wheels in, get in the car. Because I took him off because he was quiet and he didn't want to disturb him or wake him up. I took him off the wheels, put the wheels in the car, got in the car, reversed and went to go. Because he was asleep. I bet so many people have done that though.

I don't know. If you have, please do let me know. Yeah, it makes the feeling feel better. I've lived with this for eight years without telling anybody. Do you know what? I wouldn't feel bad. My parents lost me in Spain when I was't know. If you have, please do let me know. I've lived with this for eight years without telling anybody. Do you know what? I wouldn't feel bad. My parents lost me in Spain when I was like four. It's a miracle they found me again. You're not joking are you? I'm serious and this is my thing. My mum will hate me saying this. This is my thing about being a third child. I just think it's too many. You haven't got enough hands.

It's too many children to look after and I actually used to get lost all the time because they just weren't enough hands to go around. That's actually generally really scary Emma. Yeah, but I'm still here now. Nicola, God bless you. I hope you're okay. I hope you're surviving with that. She's fine. What about me? Well, you're safe, weren't you? But what did you do? Did you wander off? Do you know what happened? Do you know what I did, which I actually think was pretty great for a four-year-old. We were quite near the apartment where we were staying and I recognized it. So I found it and sat outside the steps until they came back to find me. It was honestly heartbreaking though. And it felt like, I don't know how long it was, but in my four year old mind, it felt like the longest night of my life. And every couple or person that walked past,

I thought, oh, maybe that's them. And then when it wasn't them, I'd be like, oh, I literally remember. How sad is that, this is really fucking sad. How sad is that? It's really fucking sad. It's a very vivid memory in my mind. She's gonna hate me saying this on a fucking car. Are you gonna have to put it in compliance? We might have to put that in compliance, but yeah.

But we're all fine now. You are all fine. Happy days. And life was a lot different back then. It was. Life wasn't as scary back then as it is now. Baby stories might have to go in compliance. Mine's fine to be in there. I'll take it. But thank you, Emily. Sorry, I went off on

a bit of a tangent then, didn't I, with my own? Obviously, because I'm self-absorbed. I went off with my own tangent. More about us. Appreciate you, Emily. Thank you so much. Are you a pram napper? Let us know. Email us. Hello, at secretmumpod.com or with Secret Mumpod on TikTok and Instagram. Anywho, we're off to the live show. Ah!

So if you've got tickets, we'll see you there. And we'll be back first thing on Tuesday. And we'll have more of your messages on our next Thursday episode. And we'll see you next time on the Secret Mum Club. I'm Jordan Stevens. I'm Clara Ampho, and this is our weekly music show. A celebrity guest picks the theme. We select the tunes.

And we battle it out to create the ultimate mixtape. May the best music lover win. Oh, it's about to go down. Let's go! Let's go! Let's go! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Make me a mixtape.

Listen only on BBC Sounds.