Secret Mum Club with Sophiena - The Dummy Ditch

Episode Date: March 24, 2026

Soph’s celebrating a big milestone as Renley turns two, and ditches the dummy overnight! Plus, a listener shares an important insight into feeding struggles, and there’s an unfortunate toddler mispronunciation involving a certain… body part. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Wait, hold on. I need your attention because we have some huge news. It's big. Bigger than my bucket crutch. And that's big. Even bigger than Jojo's love for teenage mutant ninja turtles. Well, you've been asking for it, so we're going to be heading back on the stage for another secret mom club lunch show. There's going to be plenty of secrets. Perhaps a couple of party games.

And maybe a few surprise guests. So mark your calendars because on the 20th of May, we'll be live at Bush Hall in London for one girly night only. So you better buckle up, bitches. Tickets are on sale right now. So head to our socials for more info and the link to buy tickets. We can't wait to see you there. Now, back to the episode. Hello, this is the Secret Mum Club.

I'm Safina. And I'm Emma. And this podcast is a safe space for mums everywhere. Safe space to share our secrets. Because we all have secrets, don't we? We do. And as we know, sharing is caring. You don't even have to tell us who you are.

You can keep that to yourself. You can be anonymous. And all those secrets can be serious or silly. All secrets are welcome in the secret mom club. We smash that. We fucking smash it straight to the camera. It's only taking three years. Full seasons, three years.

That was a lot. That's a lot. I feel like I'm memorizing it now every time I sleep. Yeah. I'm Sophia. It's like revising for an exam. Yes. But we've had three years to do it.

Three fucking years. And we've passed with an A plus. Also, big shout out to mocks. It's been the year 10 mocks. Has it? Has it? Has been going through his mock exams. Obviously, by the time this goes out, it would have been a little bit of a while back.

But it's been a big, it's been a big, um, it's been a season. I think the A levels as well. Is it? I think Eden's doing some as well. Yeah. But it seems like they're, when I went to school, exams were only in like June, but now they just seem to be all the time. I feel like it's just every, every, every, every week.

Honestly. Let's prepare for. It's coursework or exams or... Yeah. I mean, thank God I'm not doing that anymore. I don't know that I could do it now. I mean, I didn't do it the first time round, but second time I couldn't... Also, it was well driving now.

Do you know what I realised the other day? What? I just had a moment, like, just flashed into my mind and I was driving. 20 years. 20. 20 fucking years. It was my anniversary in February. What age did you pass?

17. I passed on the 8th of April when I was 17. I passed on the 8th of Feb. Fuck off. We're so parallel. What the hellie! I know! First time?

No, four. Okay. I'm going to say the first time passes are the scariest. Yeah, they say the first time passes are the worst drivers. Are they? That's what they say. I thought that was just a myth. Stefan tells me that because he was a second timer.

I'm a fourth. Yeah. Yeah, I went into a flatbed lorry. Nearly, he slammed on his emergency brakes. I also mounted the curb on a parallel park. That's straight minor. I didn't emergency stop quick enough on one of them. But on my last one, I passed fourth, fourth one.

same guy every four test. Is that not you again? Literally I was out for 23 minutes, right? And I was like, that's it. I fucking failed again. He took me back to the test centre. Didn't even reverse bay. He just said, just drive in, Sophia and turn the equation off.

And I said, what the fuck, here we go again. And he was like, I would like to congratulate you a past today with one minor. I was like, fucking out, Steve. Oh my God. We did it. He probably was just like, I can't see you again. I'm sick of you. The fucking centre's closing down.

Get the fuck out. Have your licence. Piss off. Although I am slightly terrified. One, why did Steve let me drive? Yeah. On the road at 17 years old, I was not responsible. It's not safe.

I should have not been on the road. I was fully a fucking child. It's the fact that Eden turned 17 in three weeks. Is she going to learn to drive? Of course she is. She's got to get back and fall from college. And I'm like, oh, she's still a baby. Yeah.

Why are you letting her drop? No. Yeah. Don't let her in a car. No. I'm not saying she's not trustworthy because she is. I'd put my life on that one child. Yeah.

But what is? She's still a, she's still a baby. The thought of letting them out in their own car. I'm terrified. I am terrified. I remember when I first passed, I wanted to drive to school and brag about it and it was all along like country roads,

60 mile an hour. And my mum and dad were like, please, just please, do not kill yourself on the first time that we let you out. Drive to school. We left at 15.

I was at 6. Oh, yeah, I didn't do that. And then I pulled up into the car park in my little bang and Titit! Pass my test, bitch here. Poor Eden, if she passed her test, they're not allowed to take their cars to college because there's not a rough space

for them to park. So she'll still have to get the bus, I think. Oh, what shame. I know. Isn't that so, so annoying. I remember Chris telling me, obviously me and Chris didn't know each other when we're at school,

but he had a moped. And he used to drive his moped to school. Isn't that the cutest thing? I can't imagine him on a moped. He's so tall. Yes, so tall. Legs not. All legs in.

Was he tall when he was 16 as well, probably? Yeah, I think he was tall when he was 16. My brother, though, wasn't. My brother's tall now, but he was like four foot seven until we were 18. No. Yeah, my brother. When was his grove spurt when he became an adult?

My brother's nickname and still is now, Wee Man, but the irony now is he's bigger than all of his friends. How funny. He went into the loft one day and come down like 18 foot three. Had some magic beans. It was a wildest experience. But yeah, Richie was like four foot, four foot seven, four for eight until he was 18. That's so funny, isn't it?

Do you think, like, is Colby, he'll probably be really tall and ready. I don't, I think Colby is quite, I always compare him because obviously there's 10 months between my youngest niece, Everly and Colby. So when Colby, whenever he was born, a month later I fell pregnant with Colby. So we, not that we compare them, but we do because he's my eldest, my sister's baby. So every time we put him together, I go, bloody hell, look, Colbs is tall and they're never. But I said, there's not much between them. My sister always goes, there's a whole, nearly a whole year between them.

She's a year older than him. And she's smaller? She's smaller than Colbs. Yeah, yeah, she's a little bit smaller. But I just, it makes me laugh. My sister's like, yeah, but he's younger than her. Yes. Yes. I know they're really trivial things and they don't mean anything, but it just always...

Oh, it's just so fun to compare, though. It's so fun. It's like my nephew, Luca, my sister's baby. He was born like five weeks after Sadie. And it was so funny. And he was a big boy. I was like, he was a big boy. I was like, he was a big boy. Tank. Absolutely tank. He still is like bigger than her. All their whole lives. We're going to be like, look at you too. It just never gets old. It never gets sold. It never gets sold, does it? I think Sadie's quite little as well. Sadie is a little bit of a dot though, isn't she? She's really, really big. Especially compared to having like Joseph, it was a massive. Joseph was a big boy.

Yeah, big boy. Yeah, big boy. Listen, you've had a big week this week. I've had a really whopping week, honey. I've had a whopping whopping week. How was it? My baby is two. What the fucking fuck.

How are you feeling? Not okay. Two days ago. As we record. Yeah, Monday. Yeah, so when you obviously hear this, it'll be a couple of weeks, but he was two, two days ago. he's mastered a scooter Stop it

He's riding a scooter My four year old still can't do that So on day one He couldn't really do it And then by the end of the day He was whipping, nipping going everywhere What was the key?

Did you just get him on it loads? We've just left it in the house We've not put it in the garden yet So he's just going up and down the hallway Around the kitchen Yesterday he's learnt to turn the corners He knows that he moves his way He can go around the corner

So he can get out of the corner Do a full sharp Well full sharp length depending on what way he's coming in. If he's coming from the front door, it's right. But if he's coming from that is left. Coming in half. Whatever way.

He can pull a full sharp one on it. Because have you got, we've got a micro scooter. That's what we've got. The steering is really quite hard to get used to you. You've got lean your whole way. Lean your whole way. Yeah. So he literally does it.

I can't get used to it. That's so clever that he's done that already. It's got light up wheels. So he likes it. He's like light off. Is it a free wheeler? Yeah. And we got the mini micro.

Yeah. We didn't go for the, because you could get the bigger ones and just put the handlebar right down but no we went for the micro micro mini so he's marred the scooter i feel like he's really leveled up his game do you yeah since you turn two and he's just gone fuck this shit i'm done i'm not a baby anymore i'm not baby no more i'm done with this shit he's using the he's using the toilet yeah full weewee's on the toilet yeah full wewis on the toilet any poos no no poohs a little bit terrifying which is quite a common thing yeah we can't get the poo but he will say poo's coming and he stands in the toilet nice while he's having a poo but he doesn't want to watch you he shuts himself

and poo's in the dark. Yeah. Because he can't reach the light switch. So he just stands there and I'm like, where's Renner's and Chris like in the toilet? You open the door and he's like, and he just stands in the dark and takes her poo and his naping. And he's that off. Oh, that's great. But wee-wee's on there.

Yeah, amazing. Weewee's on there. It does have obviously the odd few where he's pot of weeding his napping and obviously night time he's weeding there. But I've not put any, I don't want to put any pressure on that. No, it's only too. I was just literally like, can we slow? Can we slow down? You're nearly out of your last nappies.

Yeah. We've got a big secret. well, which is also another reason where I'm like, can we just slow, slow this the fuck down. But we had a wonderful time. We went to, obviously, favourite place in the whole entire world, the Big P, Pepper Pig World. The PPP, P, P, P, W. The Pee W. The Pee World.

We went there. My brother-in-law did queue. For the first time ever, Pepper and George were out. We did cue. My brother-in-law, bless his heart, queued for about an hour, an hour and 20 minutes, right? And then he was like, I'll call you when I'm getting close to the queue. you jump in we don't have to hang around

in the queue I was like great plan managed to get a few rides in so got to the front of the queue I thought that was it for us I thought it fucked the part because we went Saturday to Pepper Pig World

and then the Monday was his birthday which was the dinner party which was all Pepper Pig themed everything that you can name is Pepper Pig so I was like

we got to the front of the queue went in and he was like Pepper no no Papa hated it and literally hated her didn't want to talk to her And they were like, oh, stand still, Pepper and George, don't move.

And he was kind of like this looking at them like. It is weird, though. I think you think they're going to love it. I have a really irrational fear with people dressed up. And they're massive. I was shaking. I was sweating. I was like, do this for the children.

You've got to be brave. You can do it. I fucking hate it. I can't stand it. I hate furry things dressed up like characters. Like I can't. I don't know who's in there. Who's in there?

Like, I would cross the road to stay away from them. Don't make eye contact. But I was like, you've got to suck this one up, bitch. And do it. And then he's. hated them and I was like, thank God. My guy, give me a bump. Give me a bump.

And then he finally touched George and like touched him and was like, hello, George. George moved and he was like, no, George. No, no. I was like, oh, let's just get the fuck out of here. Let's just get out. Everyone was laughing because Renner's just literally full on had him out down about it. We took Joseph to see Dougie when he was a similar age and we thought he's going to love it. Hate it.

Because they're big and they move and they don't look like the characters that they're used to. So I don't think they like it. And then every ride after that we got on, he was like this. Every statue. Traumatized. Oh, they're not going to move. Don't worry. So it did take him a while, bless his heart, to try and muster up the courage.

Yeah. To get back on the boats because he loves the boats. But all the figures are on the boats where they've got like little dingies and they like spin around. But there's a lot of figures on there. And every corner. He thought they were going to start moving. Yeah, that is quite scary. Yeah.

Yeah. It was a little bit terrifying. We had to stop for lunch and kind of just give him a breathe. Give him a breather But no, it was wonderful And then we had this little dinner party on Monday And it was just dreaming We had the family round

We had muddy puddle sandwiches We had Richard Rabbit's ears Like I themed it I put labels on it and everything We had pigs and blankets Which was a sausage roll Not an actual pig in a blanket Then we had

Pepper Pig's Bellies Which was pork pie And then we had naked pigs they were just cocktails of sausages. Everything's pig themed. It's a pork. And then obviously my sister-in-law's vegetarian, so I was like, this contains no pig. Just so you know, this bowl is just for you.

But no, it was wonderful. How are you feeling about, like, do you keep reflecting on, like, when he was born? I do that thing where I'm like, oh, this, okay, two days after he was born, we would have been wherever. Because we obviously now wouldn't have left the hospital. He would have been in the NICU. We were still in the NICU. Yeah. And also going back to like them days and then you scroll through your photos, don't you?

Like that bit without getting too deep or emotional because we've already been there. But that bit was really hard. And like I'd found a photo of the first day that you put the outfit on, which is also the day that we discharged us. Which was how many days after he was born? We were nine days, nine days. So he was still from now in a hospital another week. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

We were over a week. So we don't, obviously, we come out on a Wednesday. didn't we but it's um it going back like and you look at it and you just think gosh we did we went through so much but the problem is is now when we go back to pictures it actually really upsets colby and dotty and they don't like it they don't i don't want to see because that's not how they think of it and they're probably just think of him like he is at the moment i think even for children looking at baby photos generally is weird because they're like they don't ever accept that that was some like that that was them i think what i found more sad though

is i actually went back to like the first day that we bought him home and all like the pictures from there forward, are just how small Colby and Dottie are? Oh, I know. Like really, really small. And I think that made me doubly worse. Yeah. And I think because we've been such in a bubble of like Renley's taking big milestones, you know, like he's crawling, he's walking, he's going to the toilet,

he sits at the table and eats and he does everything that they're doing just on a smaller scale, I feel like I've been so caught up with that, but I've actually not missed it because I've lived it, but I feel like I've not noticed how much they've grown. Yeah. And they're huge. I know exactly what you mean. That like guilt over the oldest child. Like when I look at like pictures and videos of Joseph now when he's like two,

around the time that's Sadie came. Yeah. I actually feel really sad for him because I'm like, God, you were really kind of forgotten about for a moment. Like when there's a newborn, there's not much space for anything else. And I think you feel bad as well because a lot of people do say that, don't they? When people fall pregnant with their second child, people say, gosh, I feel guilty that I maybe won't be able to, or some people do say, don't they?

And correct me if I'm wrong, some people will say, God, what if I don't love the second one as much as I love the first one? Or what if I don't have enough time? How do you distribute your time? And when you're in it and you're going through it, you do the best as to what you can. And you do find a way to make it work and you do love them equally the same. And you distribute your time the same. But then when you look back on pictures, you think, God, did I?

Yeah. Did I actually, though? Did I give them enough? And like if I was to ask Colby, do you feel like I left you out? And he's like, no. And then I go back through my pictures and there's loads and loads of pictures of them holding him at breakfast time, them holding him at story time, them in the bath with him. There's so many pictures that we just incorporated them to into his life. And it was like the three of them, it was never, oh, we better do this with the baby.

I didn't, you know, when I got a cuddle with him, there's a photo of me holding him. And I was like, oh God, I just remember sitting there and just hugging him for so long because the moment they'd come home from school, he'd go. He'd be in his bouncer or he'd be playing with the babies. So when I look back, I know that I did enough, but it's just that little bit in your mind that goes, fuck. Yeah. I feel like I've missed so much.

You always feel guilty, no matter what you've done. It's a really horrible game to play, isn't it? And I know I'll sit here in a year's time and I'll say exactly the same again. Yeah. God, have I done enough? Did I spend enough time with Colby and Dotty? And then have I concentrated too much on the bigger ones that I've now lost sight of renters? And it's just, it's a really, and I feel like even then now, like even when I talk to my sister about it,

and my sister's like, so if you do know I'm exactly the same now, I feel like I take the girls dancing too much and I don't go to enough of T-Man's football. And then I go to Eden's, you know, pick Eden up from college. But the other two walk back from school should I be going to pick them up? And it's, and I just feel like it will, it's just one of those things that will continue. I think it's a universal thing and it just will never, it will always be the same. Obviously, it's not a sad thing. It's just I hope someone feels safe in that. Yeah.

Because it is a hard one. Your mind fucks with you. Yeah. It plays horrible games, doesn't it? But no, we've had a wonderful time. Oh, good. Really, really wonderful. So I'd love to go back and just do it all.

I haven't let go of the balloons, somebody that fears balloons. Fears balloons and people dressed up. That's one thing that just frightens the fuck out of me. And when I say dressed up, I don't just mean like a bit of makeup. but I mean fully, fully whole mask on their head. Like when we're going through town and they'll just be a dog dressed up, like the Saints mascot or something.

His visitor's a lot. So your worst nightmare. I would have thought you would hate Disney then because they're all dressed up in Disney. Yeah, that's a good one. I would say, I am. The parade is not for you. The parade, you best believe your girl's on the curb.

I don't want no photos. There's no photos. You don't want them to touch you. It's very disconcertain when they come to. towards you and you're like, no, I can't trust you. I can't see your eyes. Before I had children, there is absolutely no photos. The only time you'll ever find a photo with me with a character is I'm holding one of the children. And I've got to suck that shit up for the baby. And I don't want them to see that I'm scared. It's just an inner fear as a child. I

think it was as a child. I must be traumatized from a child. But no, Disney, frightens the fuck out of me. But I love the magic. Do it for the kids. Doing it for the babies. That's a good mom right there. Yeah. That's what I tell myself, but I think. But no, we've had the best time. Oh, good. We've had the best time. Are you ready?

Because by the time. We've planned nothing. We've planned nothing. People have started asking me what to get her. Oh, that's sweet. So we've got some like presents kind of in mind. And she's like, what is she into? Frozen.

Frozen. Everything frozen. I was going to say is we moved on from Frozen now. No, no, still fucking frozen. And I'm like, do we have to listen to this soundtrack in the car? I've started branching out into the Frozen spin-off. films. Nice. So now she comes, she sits in front of the TV. Nothing else will do. She doesn't call it Frozen though. She's like Elsa, Anna Christoph. So that means she wants Frozen on.

But I'm like the two films. I can't, yeah, Olaf sometimes and Sven. Oh. But I'm like the two films. I can't do it anymore. But there's only like two spinoffs that are good. Olaf's Frozen Adventure and Frozen Fever. So Disney, if you're listening, please come out of some more films because I just, I cut you girls, I've had enough. I've had enough. I've had enough. It's a good film. It's a great soundtrack. But I just can't do it anymore. That's like us with Lightning McQueen when Colby was going through. His face was Lightning McQueen. Yeah. But now when Renly watch, there's loads of spin-offs.

Yes. And there's a whole series of like shorts. Yes. We went through that cast. And now I'm like, do we want to get back into cars? Shall we? I'm like, can we just get back into it? Because there's so many toy story spin-offs.

But Joseph's moved on, which makes me a little bit sad. A little bit sad. But life is a highway. What an absolute banger. I want to ride it all night long. I like cast because there's actually like normal songs in it. Yes. Like Cheryl Crow.

Yes. But yeah, it's... Frozen's great, though, because I'm a blowout. Youhoo. Big summer blood. No, it's great. So I've asked people for some like... Are you going for a dress?

Yes. She needs an Elsa dress. Anytime she sees anyone in a dress, she's like, Anna. And I'm like, close. She gets them... Cinderella. Yeah. She gets them confused.

I'm like, it's actually Elsa. But there's a picture of me in my wedding dress up in our house. And she's with Stefan. She's like, Daddy and Anna. Oh. That's me when I actually looked when I made Netflix. I would actually close. That is adorable.

Daddy and Anna. Yeah, so she loves like... She maybe thinks you're the real life, Anna. Yeah, well, not in my normal, get up. Every princess has got to have a day off. Christ. Give yourself a break. If I put a bit of makeup and a dress on, she's like,

Anna, don't leave Anna. I'm like, yes, I am a princess. Thank you. But yeah, everything frozen, so we've asked for like some frozen stuff. And, you know, I think she's really... I hope I'm not pushing her too much down this path, but she does seem really girly. Like, she loves shiny things.

things, dresses, princesses. We went to M&S the other day and she picked up like a pair of pink literary Chelsea boots. Oh, nice. Put them on her just to walk around the shop. Well, I had to take them off at the till. All hell broke loose. I was like, these aren't coming home with us. She was like, ah, shoes.

Chews. So now I'm like someone can get us some glittery shoes forever. Specifically the M&S ones. The M&S Chelsea, pink Chelsea boots. They have stock everywhere. It's so hard, isn't it? Because as well, like when you have children, I'm always like, like Renly wears girls clothes

I'm not bothered pink you wear it yellow looks divine with your eyes I'm not somebody like he brings out your eyes he can really pull it off he pulls off really stunning he's got lovely colouring and I've got no like I've got no qualms

like the amount of clothes I buy from next specifically next we salute you the clothes that can be boys and girls yeah love that yeah but there's some things like with regards to like toys and stuff like that

I'm always like oh should we play with he loves civilian families absolutely loves that but he's got his own toys But where he doesn't have the bigger twos, toys to play with, I find it really hard as to have like the diverse and toys. So obviously when Colby was born, he was cars mad.

Yeah. I gave him a dolly, didn't give a shit. I gave him, because people say to, like when you're going like the health visitor, encourage different types of toys, dollies, Barbies. Yeah. You know, I don't want to put any gender on anything. I'm just like, oh, you play with whatever makes your heart happy. Colby threw and three, it was everything cars.

You touched his cars. he would have broken your neck. It had to be cars on the tele, cars playing. And then when Dottie came, I was like, oh, she's got some cars to play with. So she did play with cars. But just like Sadie, she was drawn to babies. She was mothering. She wanted a pram.

She wanted all the girl stuff. Wings, we spent a lot of an era going through wings, dresses and wellies. She wouldn't wear anything other than a dress and wellies. And that's how she lived her life. She'd have a little handbag, sunglasses. Yeah, accessories. I might have to find the picture of her because this was, we were deep in COVID. when this happened.

And that's how she spent her life. It's in a dress wellies, hat, glasses. She'd even have like a little mug she'd walk around with. But she'd like totter around the garden. And it didn't matter in any way, shape or form. If I gave her a football, wasn't interested. So I encouraged them to have whatever toys they wanted. But Renly, I just feel like there's no,

because I don't have the toys in the house. So he'll play with Doxie Savalians. Yeah. And he plays with a couple of her dollies. But he is hard cars. Yeah. And it doesn't matter if it's a hot wheel car. Lightning McQueen car

Pepper Pig car As long as that It's on wheels And it's on wheels Yes, best believe he's Averna It's interesting when you have a child Of each gender as well Because like they really are playing with everything

Like we've obviously got like all the girly toys in the house now And all the boy toys in the house And Sadie again like she will like wheel a car around But the thing that she really loves is like the dollies and the prams And I'm just like maybe that's just And everyone that I speak to says that about their girl and boy children as well So maybe that's just It's hard because you and you want

want to encourage them to do and play with other things. Like Renly will sit with Dotty and he'll do like the blusher brush on his face. And then he'll go into Colby's room and then he's like on the PlayStation. So he's got like the difference. He's got both. Yeah, he's got both. But obviously they're just so big. But now it's like, oh, you don't know what, you don't want to push it on them, do you?

I think that's my point is getting at is you don't want to push it on them. But you have to just go with what they love. Yeah. It's funny. Like the other day I was at a play group and Sadie had like a sage green track suit on. I would say, with like a green dribble beard and she's got blue trainers and someone was like, how old is he? And I was like, that's so interesting.

Because to me, her face and her hair, like she looks like a girl, but they've just assumed, oh, she's in green and blue clothes today. I was like, oh, it's actually a girl. And they were like, oh, I'm so sorry. I was like, oh, it's fine. But like, unless she's wearing pink, we get it all the time because Renly wears pink and yellow. People think it's a girl. They're like, oh, gosh, how old is she?

And I'm like, oh, she's a boy. And I don't know why I answer like that. I don't say he's a boy. go, oh sorry, she's a boy. She's a boy. And then I should, it doesn't really matter. I'm not bothered in the slightest. People always used to say she for Joseph when he was a proper,

Yeah, same as Colby. Colby always got a girl. Yeah. They'd be like, oh, she's beautiful. How old is she? And I was like, because she's so pretty. Colby was blue and green. He really pulled off blue and green.

And even still, they used to go, oh gosh, isn't she beautiful? It got to the point where I was like, I know she is. She's a real dream. Colby, no. Oh. That didn't really summarise my week at all. I know we've been blabbering on. I've been back at work this week.

It's all about me. What? Proper work, not this work. You've got, what? I was back at work on the radio for the first time, which was nice. You told me last week you were going to potentially start thinking about it. Yeah, well, I've been able to do it from home. So I just started on a full, fully blown job.

No, not a new job. I just slotted in just a couple of days. A couple of days cover. I can do it from a study, which has been so nice. Shut the fuck up. And it's been so nice to be back on because I feel like I'm kind of forgetting how to do things because I'm just haven't been at work for four months. I mean, I don't mean to diminish this.

This is also my job. But this is like... This is fun work. This is fun. This doesn't feel like work. No. It's just a catch up with your bestie. But my proper work. Yeah.

I've done a couple of shifts. It's just been really nice to like just dip my toe back in. Who for? Are we allowed to say no. I've been, yeah. No, it's the same company I used to work for because I kind of knew them all already. So I was like, guys, if you need anyone. So, and they were like, yeah, you can do it from home.

So, what for Dave Barry too? No, not for absolute. I've been on Great. Greatest hits radio Oh that's pretty big Greatest it's radio You're gonna have to get Chris to change stations Yeah I know you have to get reprogram his favourite in

Yeah Shit So is it a permanent thing No it's just a temporary It's just freelance cover here and there But it feels quite like mega To be like back doing stuff Because I literally like felt like

I was forgetting how to like You know when you just think Oh I need to keep my skills honed I didn't want to like forget And it's a perfect arrangement really Because I don't want to work all the time But just being able to do a little bit here and there It's a great little set up.

So, yeah. So I've been back on, thanks. Go you. Let's salute you. What a powerhouse, I'll say. It's great until the kids come home at six and bang on the door. And I'm like, I'm actually live on air here. Please.

Can we? Mike live. It's literally that COVID scene, isn't it? Yeah. They're so excited to see me as though. And I'm like, shh. Oh, I love that. Yeah, just a quick little catch you up there.

A busy but a quiet week for you, really. Yeah. It's been like. Yeah, it's been Nice Yeah Low key But also big

Loki big Low key big It's been Loki big Yeah If that makes sense So Emma and I really want to hear from you Yeah we want you to join us In the Secret Mum Club

You're all welcome You can share your secrets with us Respond to what we've been talking about Or just say hello You can find us on TikTok and Instagram Just search Secret MumPod Or you can email us Hello at Secret Mumpod

com It's time for the Correspondence Corner Right. Are you ready? Yeah. Take it away, honey. All right. It's not time to shine. Hi ladies. Hi ladies. Hey ladies. Hey, ladies. Hey, single ladies.

Oh, what were you going for? Single ladies. Oh, the single ladies. Oh, the single ladies. Oh, I was going for usher. Hey, fellas. You know, you're doing good because they're jealous. Okay. Is that the words? Yeah. I thought it was jared up up. They only hate you because you're a go-getter. Pop your collar. Don't let it sweat you. I didn't know that. Okay. Dokey. Firstly, thank you so much for making motherhood more bearable.

I'm currently trying to survive the sass of a three-year-old. Oh, yeah. I wanted to get in touch after hearing Hanan talk about her daughter wetting the bed. There can be so many reasons and explanations for this. I don't want to scaremonger, but my daughter was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes at 17 months old, and one of the most common symptoms is excessive weeing. It might be a wild explanation, but if I'd known that at the time, we might have avoided the massive trauma of my daughter becoming so ill before she was diagnosed.

I just felt the need to write in and share this possibility. Thank you for making me feel less alone. And I'm sure you'll love to know that my daughter, Beth, shouts correspondence corner along with you every week. Oh, lots of love, Laura from Kent. Laura. I didn't know about that, did you? Yes, I did know about that. Only because we do have one in the family that has struggled with wet in the bed for a really long time.

So we kind of knew the triggers and what to go through and what to look out for and what they got checked for. And one of them was diabetes? They got tested and it was fine. It's just, I don't want to say who it was, but they wet the bed for a really long time, and I don't want it to be in an embarrassing story. But obviously, everything is fine now. But it was, there's a certain age you have to be before doctors will take it seriously. But obviously, in this case, Laura's case, she was, Beth was obviously clearly really unwell before she got diagnosed. So there is signs to look out for one.

The doctors will make you aware of that. But yes, I did know of that one. Yeah. But it's quite a scary one. I feel like that's a real, a real. scary. Yeah, I feel like it would be scary. But also it's probably quite a simple thing to test for, I would say. Yeah. Probably quite easy. So it might be worth getting that checked out if that's something that you're worried about. Most definitely. It's always worth asking the question. Yeah. And we were

really lucky in the fact that the doctors proactively did so much to help and support us. And there was constant reviews and checking and ticking all the boxes to make sure it couldn't be an underlining issue. Yeah. And that be, and that be in the case. Yeah. So usually when it's little ones as well, they're pretty good in my experience because they don't want to miss something. So if you feel like you want to get that checked out, then if Hanan, if you're listening, that could be something to look into.

Yes. Thanks, Laura. Thank you, Laura so much. And God bless Beth. Correspondence. I wonder if she sings high school musical as well. Maybe she's a bit young for that, but we'll get her on to it. Yeah, we'll get it time.

She'll be there. So you can get in touch with us on anything at all. Yeah, it can be serious or silly, and you can be totally anonymous. Because between us, we've probably heard it all before. Beth, are you ready? I remember. I remember.

We're all in this together and we know that we are. We're all stars and we see that. You went real performative then. That was a good one. I went to the camera. You were straight at the camera, not even. Always got YouTube on the brain. I'm a pro.

I'm a pro. What can I say? I'm a pro. I feel Rosie's eyes burning into the side of my head. Can you? What, look at the fucking camera. The fucking camera. I can't see Rosie.

She's here. I just got Zofia. who's actually in a plant today, a plant that looks like it could do with some water. Yeah, looks like it needs some love. Yeah, bless her heart. Right, are you ready? Yeah.

For my secret of the way. I'll probably hype this up more than what actually it is. So we went to Pepper Pig World on Saturday and Renley nodded off in the queue for the hot air balloons. Noted off. I was downstairs waiting. Actually, what was I doing? I wasn't downstairs. I was just waiting at the other.

So Roxanne and James went on with all the children. I don't know why I didn't go on the ride I had the pram I don't know but I wasn't on the ride so as I was sort of sort of sort of bits out my sister sent me a picture and she was like oh my gosh

she's nodded off there was a video of him on the hot air balloon like oh he fell to sleep on the hot air balloon fell to sleep on the queue and then they got on the ride because they were right at the front no the whole ride

he's like it in my sister's Is it quite a relaxing ride? I would say it just bobs along bobbing along and it just spins around in seconds It's a really divine ride. So come off, fast asleep, put him into the stroller. Because we actually hired a stroller first time from Portland's Park.

Why don't you take your own buggy? Because Renley hates the buggy. He's too big for the buggy. He doesn't want the buggy. But we hired a double stroller best thing in the world, if anyone's going. Who else was going in it? Dotty sat in it. Evely sat in it.

Then Dots and Evers, Colbs and Evers. Colbs and Dots. Renner's was in there. It was just great. It was just great. Hiled all the coats, all the drinks, everything. It was a dream. She was a dream.

So obviously carried on with the rest of our day. Come to night time, Renly had fallen to sleep with no dummy. And then the whole day never had the dummy. Right, when I tell you, this boy lives, breathes, eats dummy, he eats food in his mouth with the dummy in it. He'll have a spoonful of dinner and he'll put his dummy in. When I tell you he's addicted to his dummy, he adores his dummy. He adores his dummy. It's everything. He'll even walk around with one in each hand.

while one's in his mouth. Sometimes he's got two in the mouth, two in the hands. When I tell you, dummy is running these live. So he didn't have a dummy for the nap. And because we were so exhausted at Poulton's Park, I was like, oh, it was getting bathed, getting ready for bed, couldn't find the dummy. By the time I'd got upstairs from retrieving the dummy from downstairs in his car, he'd fall into sleep.

No. No dummy. I thought I'd text a family group chat and I was like, guys, I think it's happening. My sister was like, no, don't let it happen. And I was like, you were the one let him nap. Because that's the baby. It's just a family joke. Like, that's the baby in him is to have the dummy.

Yeah. So I was like, no, I was like, you started this. You didn't give him his dummy when he had a nap. Like, it's just been a running back and forth joke. He must have been so knackered that he just passed out. Day five. He's kept doing it. We've got no dummies.

Stop it. No dummies. Can I, if it's this easy to get him off the dummy, I'm so fucking jealous. No dummy. How? I cannot. I cannot. We're not talking about it.

We've got none of any reach anywhere that he. can get him. All of them has been removed from his bed. He is not even ask it. We're day five now and he's normally asked for it during the day. What does he call it again? Bibbies. Bibies. Bibies. Bibies is everything. He'll, and when I tell you, there's a bibbies everywhere. But you know what, right? I will, I will commend him because he is, he's not a wingy baby, but if he doesn't, it'll cry and cry and cry till he gets the bibbies. And then I kind of just go, oh gosh, here have the dummy. And I give in to him. And I do, I'm a little bit of a sucker for that. I'm just like, okay, have his dummy. It's just easier, isn't it? He has laughed so much in the last five days.

He has spoken. His speech has come on loads. He is just the happiest little... Is he less dribbly? We've got no dribble. It's just the happiest little soul. He's eating loads. He's playing.

And we are now... So day four, it was the first day that he never asked for it at all. And now we're day five today. And we've got no dummy. So basically he turned two and he's just grown up overnight. He's gone, fuck this shit, guys. Dummy. He's going to be no dummy, no nappies?

No dummy, no nappy. and we're starting preschool in four weeks. It'll be two weeks by the time you hear this. I can't believe it. I'm absolutely... And he's not asking for it at all? How many do you reckon you had? We've got eight.

I counted them and I've collected them and I've put in a basket. We've got 12. We've got 12 babies. I found them in the toy. I've had to clean all the cupboards out because they're in his toy trunk. They're in every basket. They're in his bed. They're in his bed.

They're in his bed. They're in the kitchen. Covered kitchen drawer. Some in the dishwasher. It was like a treasure hunt of Bibby. I'm terrified that if he finds it to hide. He's got to find one. Well, you've done really well to hide them

because some days we're like, we're not giving Sadie the dummy today. And then someone will pick her up and it'll be on the fucking kitchen island. That's what I panicked. But you've done really well. I love it when you find one unexpected. Like we thought we'd lost one for ages.

No one had eaten corn flakes for a while. One day, Joseph was like, I want corn flakes today. I was like, there's that fucking dummy. She just popped it in the top of the box. There's that one. And because she hadn't seen it for ages. She looked it and she went, oh, stars. Oh, that was the design.

That's where that went. It's just, I'm thinking about that one. I can't believe it. That's massive. I'm honestly, I'm honestly bamboozled. I cannot. I just, and do you know, since not doing the bibbies, he's now doing cheese. So every photo he goes, cheese.

Whereas he's not done that. He's never smiled for a picture. He's normally got dummy in. He's normally got a dummy in. But now he even says, cheese. And he does his little smile. I'm just so proud of him. I can't believe it.

Because that's huge. It's massive. And I tell you as well, I'm the luckiest. I feel so incredibly lucky because we've got no tears. He's not even cried for it. He's not asked for it. And I tell you what, sometimes in the middle of the night, he'll let out a cry and we'll just run in pop his dummy back in.

He's sleeping through to the point where he's actually sleeping better with no dummy. This is what I mean, right? This is why you need to get rid of it. I think it's easy to get rid of it is because you don't have those moments where you're like, oh, quick, go and give the dummy. It's just, it's not a thing. And people that go, oh, I couldn't get my child to take a dummy. I'm like, I'm jealous.

They say it like it's a bad thing. And I'm like, you've never had to go. Go in in the night and settle your child. I do think they're brilliant in some ways. Like if they cry when they're out or whatever, you can quickly calm them by just being like, it's great fatigue. It's a comfort.

I do think there are great things about it. There's a lot of things that I used the dummy for. And there was reasons behind me using the dummy because my brain, I'm a bit of a worry ward. So when you do read up on a dummy, it does have a lot of factors. And some people are happy to not use a dummy and some don't want that. And again, it is the attachment. It's getting rid of the attachment.

Getting rid of it is hard. I think it's so great when they're little. But when it comes to getting rid of it, I think it's so hard. So if you've managed to do that with no bargaining, no negotiating, no tears, no plan to tell him, oh, you're not going to have a dummy anymore. No, that's amazing. Nothing. Didn't even have to cut them or anything because Dotsies, we had to cut them so that she couldn't suck them anymore.

But no, we've had nothing. That's amazing. No tears. And he's sleeping solidly, like sound as a pound. And his naps are fine as well. Naps are just not off. He'll just be on the sofa for one minute and then he'll just go. Honestly, oh shit.

Yesterday we were just watching Pepper Pig and I could feel his head going on me and he just was like, he just nodded off. Oh my God. On the sofa. So I thought, oh, I'll leave you there,

pop a blanket on him. Two hours he slept for. No. Two fucking out. And then don't tell me he still goes to bed at like six o'clock at night. Yeah, he does. Six seven. Six seven.

You've got a sleeper. Oh. You're so lovely. He loves his bed though. Yeah. But I would say the last few days as well, what has, I think, helped the dummy is we have had a really, really busy five days.

say when you go back to like a normal sketch, is he going to be like, where's coming? So we had been at Poulton's Park, which he was unbelievably shattered doing that. And then Sunday we'd gone out to watch Colby play football and he spent the whole time running around in a field for three hours. Yeah. And then Monday was obviously his birthday party. He didn't take a nap all day because he'd scoot, scooted all day. And then by the time everybody'd come, I was like, well, it's too late for a nap now. You're going to have to keep going.

So got to 8 o'clock and he was bar, he was nodding off in the bar. So popped him into bed, fell to sleep. Tuesday we built his trampoline So he had his trampoline Tuesday So he's been go go go But I think now where he's so Like the weather's getting nicer He's in the garden

He's on the trampoline He's scooting We're walking to school and walking home And when I tell we're walking He is walking It takes us about three hours To get home from school But he's shattered

He has to walk everywhere And then he comes home He plays in the garden again With the bigger two Yes he's just been busy I just feel like it's been a really good time Where the weather's beautiful We've been out

With the days are lighter Longer It's nicer weather That is, I wouldn't, I'm not going to take credit for it. No, yeah, I'm not going to. But I think it's, you know, you're in the habit. Exactly. So now hopefully he's just in this new.

We're over halfway. Yeah. Tune in next week when we've given the dummy back. Crystal's ended you a photo now going, oh, is. Oh, he found one. I've given it back to him. The one in the cupboard. Yeah.

There's not one in that. I've checked. Let me tell you, when I said to the babies, you've checked everywhere. Five pound. Five pound. For every dummy found. For every dummy found.

They didn't find anything. 10, damn it was later. You were skin. They didn't find any. But they went high and low. It was like a treasure hunt for them. Renly was sleeping. I was like, you've got to go through your cupboards, shoes, under your beds.

You've got to go everywhere. And if you find one, five pound. And I was like, oh, they found nine. You found them all. And you were like, all the money for me. Mama did get. So no, there you go. Well, congratulations.

Thank you. And fuck you. And fuck, yeah. I'll take that, honey. I'll take it. Honestly, I would like to say it was me. It's all him. Yeah.

What a ledge. Well done, Renner's. Well done, runners. We're getting to some of yours after this short break. We've got three secrets from you this week that we are going to be discussing. Have I said it wrong again? No, it was right, but it just makes me laugh every time now. We got three weeks.

What? We've got three secrets from you this week that we're going to be discussing. We've got three secrets from you this week that we are going to be discussing. So take it away, Emma. Did I do it right the second time? Yeah, it was always right. It's just so many words. It's, anyway.

Hey, ladies. someone had told me that milk production can be affected by the amount of blood you lose during labour? Yes. I didn't know that either. After a really traumatic birth, I was desperately trying to feed my baby but just wasn't producing enough. It was only years later that someone told me it was actually very unlikely I would have because I'd lost so much blood that my body couldn't repair itself and produce milk at the same time. Fuck. Those first few weeks would have been so much easier if I'd known that. I was in hospital struggling and they were formula feeding him in the nursery but still letting me sit there sobbing and trying to feed. I didn't

want to keep this bit of knowledge a secret. I hope you can help another mum struggling to breastfeed love anonymous. Oh, I thought it was just a delay. I didn't know. All together it could. Maybe it depends how much. Yes. Yeah, that's what I was about to say. That must be she's obviously had a really big blood. Oh. Isn't that heartbreaking? Why is that never spoken about? The early feeding struggles, I feel so like sad for mums now because I just feel like they just don't, you don't get enough help. They're kind of just like put baby straight on the boob when they come out. And if they don't feed like, but is that because we don't have enough resources? Mate, probably.

Is it just because our midwives are so stretched? That was my personal experience. Like I didn't, they were just like, well, feed now. And there was no like, this is how you do it or it was just expected that you could do it straight away. And I struggled massively to feed Joseph and Sadie for weeks, months. Like, it was so painful. But I just feel like, unless you go and seek out the help yourself, like my experience and speaking to other people is that you just, you need someone in hospital to be like, If you want to do it, there is someone dedicated to show you this is how you do it.

Or to tell you, oh, you lost so much blood during your birth, it's going to be harder for you. But to just be sitting there and feeling like you fail because you can't feed your baby, it's just heartbreaking. I think mine was not easier or better, but I think because I was in the hospital so much before having Renli. And then I was in, and he was in the NICU, I felt like I had a wonderful experience because they would offer or help and support me and tell. me how to hold him and if I was comfortable and so forth. But I think when you had like when Dotty I was out. Yeah. I was only in for 10 hours. You know, I had her and then I was out early doors in the morning. So I think you're out so quick. But from having Colby, I wouldn't have known had I wanted to, I didn't want to breastfeed with Colby. So had I have known, I wouldn't have never known

who to talk to, who to calls. How to do it. Yes. I imagine you speak to the health visitor or doctors or Yeah, but they don't come until like the next day. Yeah. Or the day after or whatever. So you spend all these hours thinking, I don't know if I'm doing it right. Because I don't think I actively wanted to breastfeed with Dottie and Colby. I don't know the process. I remember, I think in the hospital, the midwives asking me if he was formula or breastfed.

And obviously I said formula and I had my own milk for them. But you fed them? But I fed them the bottles. Yeah, I fed them the bottles because they asked instantly. But because I never actively asked or said I'm breastfeeding. Did I just not see the correct person? Was I not given that availability? Yeah, because I didn't seek it or ask if actually I'm in two minds.

Could somebody have a chat with me? Yeah. I just don't know that they gave me that support or advice. Yeah. When I wasn't. I don't know how much midwives are trained on that as well. Like the people that I saw after that really helped me were like specific lactation consultant.

That's their specific area of like expertise. Yes. But I feel like the midwives like, just put them on the boob now. And I'm like, what do you mean? What position? How, like my latch was never deep enough. That's why it was so painful. Needed someone to come along and be like,

because when I moved to nursery four, so that's the last one in the NICU for us, there was actually a lady there. Oh, was there? And she was supporting mums in the NICU because obviously it's the, you move up. I know I've said this before,

but in NICU, you move up. So you move up rooms. And when you're in the last one, that's when you're getting ready to go home and your baby's going to be able to go home. There was a lot of support and guidance in that room. So they did have. a lady there specifically talking about it and they had little curtain up and that was great but yeah

again but that's specifically for niccub babies right well yes I imagine so I imagine that was because you're you're wanting to make them as strong and have all the knowledge as possible because you've had a preemie baby yeah to yeah yeah to go home with but yeah again because I didn't actively ask I wonder if there was never that information yeah made available to me yeah but it's hard isn't it? It should be something available in all hospitals, but as with everything, it's probably a funding related thing. Yeah, it's a shame because it's such a like vulnerable and just a hard moment for when you first have a baby and the first thing you want to do is feed them. And if you can't do it and there's so many emotions attached to it and yeah, it's just really hard. So it's,

I'm sorry, anonymous that you never, you never had that information, but hopefully it can help somebody else out. Yeah, hopefully it can help somebody else out. That's really lovely information to pass on, isn't it? But we're sending you all our love and thank you so much. Okay, let's have secret number two. This one says, hello both. I was always told that I could never have children due to health complications. I met my now fiancé when I was 23 and he already had three children, which felt perfect for me.

But as time went on, we decided to try for a baby of our own and we've been truly blessed with two beautiful girls who are my absolute world. My pregnancies were really hard and both girls had to arrive early, but they're now happy and healthy, aged three and eight months. Here's where I'm struggling. My fiancé has booked in to have the snip, which I do understand. He has five children and he's also worried about my health. But even though I agree with his reasons, I'm finding it really hard to accept that I'll never have another baby. It feels like the choice has once again been taken away from me

and it's brought back memories of being told when I was younger that I'd never have children. I keep thinking, what if in a few years' time we decide with like just one more? Lots of love, anonymous. I could literally vouch for this. Has she, he literally booked it in without, like, consulting her? I know. I imagine they've spoken about it. about it because she does say that she completely understands his reasoning. But this is something

that's so, I can resonate so much to it because obviously I was told I'd never have children. I had eggs frozen. I went through everything. I had my sister was going to carry my baby when I found the right partner. So I was literally to the point where that was it. I wasn't having children. If I wanted to have a baby, my sister was going to be my surrogate to carry our baby. And I think where we had Colby and Dotty, we obviously did have, just a trigger warning, we did have the miscarriage of the twins in between Colby and Dotty. Because when we had Colby, we were like, right, we know we want to. So let's have another one as quickly as we can, you know, because my body's already gone through it and I'm already ready. That was just my mentality.

I was like, oh, well, let's do it, you know, do it again and see if we can fall pregnant again, fell pregnant with the twins. and obviously that ended unfortunately. And then we went on to have Dottie, which we fell pregnant 15 months after having Colby. And to feel so blessed to have them. But where I was told I'd never have children, for me it's been really hard to come to terms with. Like now, Renly's two.

I keep thinking, what if we just have one? Like I can't, I don't see how I can, in my head, stop wanting them. Yeah. Like how, like I know financially I would never ever be able to have anymore because it is, it's so expensive. But I can't seem to tell my brain like, no, no, don't have one more. Yeah. I think that's really common.

I think, like, even if you really know it's your last baby, you're always like, what about if I just had one more? And fucking social media is the worst because every time I scroll through social media, my algorithms leave me thinking, oh, I've really loved to have another baby. I'd love to have three. And realistically, like, we probably won't have another one. But I think your brain is always, like, holding on to that little bit of, like, hope that you might. But which is why we've not booked Chris in. I think my point was as why we've not booked Chris in.

Same with Stefan. Like, a few of my friends' partners have had it done. And now I'm a bit like, well, what we're waiting for? Like, you could just get it done. That'd be your contraception sorted. Yeah. But there's something holding us off of being, like, a pulling the trigger. And I don't know if that feeling's ever going to go.

No. I don't know if that's ever going to stop or that feeling's ever going to go. And it feels really final. I know the sex can be reversed, but it feels like quite major. Like once you make that decision, that's basically it. Because it got taken away from me exactly like... Anonymous. It has said.

Someone telling me, you can't have children, that got taken away from me. It's like that feeling over again. And I lived a lot of trauma for five years like dealing with that. And then obviously we went on to have them. And I feel so incredibly blessed and lucky to have had Colby and Dottie to then go another six years later and we've had Renley. And I know there's so many health complications. around me carrying another baby. Like it was really bad with renters.

And I just don't know that I would get through having a fourth one. But I don't want someone else to tell me. No, sorry, you can't. Actually, there's too many health complications. Because then I'm like, well, don't you tell me. And like, if Chris has a phecctomy, it's like, oh, well, now you've made it fine. And I can't make the decision for myself. Yeah.

And I know we're never going to have a fourth baby. We wouldn't. It just wouldn't be fair on my health. Wouldn't be fair on the baby. because, you know, I'm a lot more higher risk now to if we were to have a fourth baby. But it's just, you just feel out of control. Yeah. You feel out of control.

Like, one get told you can't have children, then you fall pregnant. And then somebody says, well, actually, no, I'm going to have sex. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It is a tough one. It's hard. I mean, even if you've come to that arrangement between you, to that agreement between

you, like it's still a hard truth to accept. It's hard pill to swallow it. Yeah, yeah, it is. But I totally feel that, though, because that's literally where my brain is at. And even though we won't have any more, I'm just like, just don't, just in case. Just in case. I don't know. I want to know what your partner's saying.

Is he definitely like, no, that's it. I'm definitely getting this done. Or could you like put it off for a bit? I don't know. You never know. The third baby has been. You have to do what's right for you, but it is a hard one. The third baby has been incredible in life.

You're thinking about the third one. Give it, it'd be his sick. It'd be his sick. Yeah, it would be his sixth baby. Would be my, yeah, obviously it was our third baby. But yes, he's been a little dream. But yeah, it's a hard one. It's a tough one.

And I don't think you're alone in that at all. No. No. Right, let's have our last secret. All right, this one says, Hi, Safina and Emma. I was listening to your latest episode. There was a poo in the bath.

And the story about Rory mispronouncing skunk reminded me of something my 19-month-old daughter, Juniper said a couple of weeks ago. What a lovely name. Delicious. My husband, Juniper and I were out shopping when she pointed at a coat and asked my husband, what's that?

He told her it was a coat. and her response was not what we expected. She turned around and confidently announced, Cock! It was incredibly hard to keep a straight face while standing in the middle of the coat section as Juniper continued happily pointing and shouting, cock, cock, I really love your podcast

and had been listening from the very beginning. Thank you both for all the laughs. Cleopatra from Cornwall. Oh my gosh. I need to know your husband's day now. Yes. Wow. Steve.

Oh, Dave. Cleopatra, Juniper and Dave. Cleopatra, Juniper. What's... Stunning. Oh, I wonder if she's Cleo for short. I love Cleo. I really wanted to Cleo.

That's lovely, isn't it? That is beautiful. How funny. I love... The mispronounction... They never get old. How ironic. The mispronunciations.

We'll never get old, will they? They never get old. We love them so much. Thank you. My absolute favourite. That's brilliant. Can you imagine? Cork!

What you're wearing today? Cork! Just grabbing my cock! My brother's friend, bless his heart. He's just had a... another baby. My brother's best friend, sorry, he's had two children, but he's just had another baby. But his eldest one is just letting the knife and fork.

And she says, fuck it and fork. Fuck it. It's not even forked that she's getting wrong. Fuck it and fork. So funny. I love it. So much. But thank you all so, so much for your secrets this week.

We really appreciate them. And everyone is welcome on the Secret Mum Club. If you'd like to share your secrets with us, you can. The email is hello at secretmumpod.com. and we're Secret Mum Pod on TikTok and Instagram. I went with the awe. Oh. You missed the awe.

Or and or? Did you do it on purpose because I was mimicking, miming. Were you? Yeah, it was. Did it just a trip you up? Oh, I thought you did. Are you wearing a cock? Or have you got any dummy weaning tips?

Then let us know. There really is nothing too outrageous. Keep an eye out for our Thursday episode. And we'll see you next time on the Secret Mom Club.