Secret Mum Club with Sophiena - The Gassy Labour
Episode Date: July 29, 2024There are a lot of ways to induce labour but in this episode, we hear one mum's new, smellier method. Sophiena and Emma chat about the realities of potty training and organising the household, and we ...have a wonderful pregnancy reveal story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Don't cry for me, Argentina
The truth is I never left you
All through my wild days
My magic sisters.
They kept their promise.
Isn't it my mad existence?
I thought it was my magic sisters.
Hello.
This is the Secret Mum Club.
I'm Safina.
And I'm Emma.
And this is a podcast.
It is a podcast.
This is a podcast.
And it's also.
It's also. This podcast is a safe space for mums everywhere.
Safe space to share our secrets.
Because we all have secrets, don't we?
And as we know, sharing is caring.
You don't even have to tell us who you are.
You can keep that to yourself.
You can be anonymous.
And those secrets can, hey-o.
Those secrets can be serious or silly.
All secrets are welcome in the secret mum club
there's proof that everyone thinks it's just copied and pasted every week and it's not it's
live and direct we record it every single episode yeah the same intro intro intro same intro intro
sounds better doesn't it it's mad that we're still messing it up 53 episodes in.
Yeah.
It's been a year now.
Also, like, Bikerless, when people laugh at me for calling them Bikerless.
Cyclists.
Bikerless sounds so much better.
Intro sounds better than intro.
You should change it.
Enter.
Yeah.
Enter.
Enter.
Enter.
One time, show time, hook line, let's roll, let's ride.
I made a slightly jump there. You did literally scare the shit out of her. When I's roll, let's ride. I may have slightly jumped there.
You did literally scare the shit out of her.
When I was younger, I used to think I was Alicia Dixon from Mystique.
She's one of a kind, ain't she?
Here we go again upon the rainbow's ride.
Here we go again upon the rainbow's ride.
Let me start again, let me pip you.
I got one thing to say to you today.
How many times have you led someone astray?
How many times have you said I'm gone away, gone away?
It's a brand new day.
We got it going on.
Well done.
I thought I'd let you have that moment.
That was solid.
I've needed to get that out since I was 14.
Have you?
That was your moment.
This is my moment.
This is my perfect moment with you.
This is now a singing pod.
Honestly, I think we should have a karaoke episode.
We should go out and do karaoke.
On live.
Should we do it live?
Yes.
Come and tune into us live.
Imagine if we did a live show and no one turned up.
Just be you, me.
That's a mood killer.
And the babies.
I think we should go to Lucky Voice.
Because there's not many like, you know.
Britain's Got Talent.
Yeah.
Hello.
Aim high.
You know when you go to karaoke though and people are like scared about
showing off and they're like oh no i don't want to take the mic i don't want to say again no stop
it don't make me say i do it and then i'm like me and you are on a level where we could just be
ourselves yeah yeah i thought we could tell me about your week what the fuck has been going on
i don't even know to be fair we had jabbies i don't think i've told you about that we had jabs
third jabbies took them like a champ i've told you about that. Third jabs. Third jabbies.
Took them like a champ.
I thought they injected them with happy serum.
And it was fine.
Literally, first one in his leg didn't even cry.
You're choking.
No.
This is the same baby that struggled with them.
Because the second one was really bad, wasn't it?
And then second one in the other leg cried a little bit, then started laughing.
I was a little bit psychotic.
He's a sadist.
I was a little bit scared for myself.
Two days after, absolutely great.
Then he cried.
Oh.
From like day three.
Onwards.
Until now.
Until now, he hasn't really stopped.
Because he had a bad reaction to the second batch of jabs, didn't he?
Yeah, I probably worded it wrong.
He didn't have a bad reaction.
He took them great.
It didn't affect him.
No.
He just cried.
Yeah.
Which is very, very poorly.
Yeah. And upset. Had a temperature and stuff. he took them great it didn't affect him no he just cried yeah which is very very poorly and upset had
a temperature and stuff and the first and third are meant to be the worst because it's meningitis
i never know which ones are when i think it's the first and the second uh the first and the third
because it's the big one because they only have one injection on the second but on the first and
second they have two one in each leg she had two on a second and the rotavirus still right don't
don't again again last episode don't
listen to emma this episode don't listen to me don't take any advice from what we're talking
about probably or maybe he did have two in his legs because i feel like they do the first one
and they're like they cry and then on the second one it's like even worse because they're like
you've done me dirty you've done the second one was bad done the double and then the third one
i'm dreading it because we've got our third batch coming up
and Stefan's away that night.
You're going to be great.
It's going to be savage.
You're going to smash it.
I think you're going to be absolutely tremendous.
Tremendous.
Tremendous.
When the crowds say,
boat selector.
Yeah.
I was going to say,
I just hope Joseph sleeps that night
because he's been really...
Would you like to see Craig David live?
Mugging me off with bedtime.
I would love to see Craig David.
Sorry, I just thought we'd put that out there just for a second yeah it's like the soundtrack to my like teenagers yeah yeah and he's from
savampton is he yeah he is represent represent represent you know colby has a really really
insane um talent in beatboxing like he's wild like I feel like I try to record him all the time
but he says no.
Too shy.
Like the karaoke situation.
No, don't.
He's actually phenomenal.
He makes so many noises
at one time
it's actually wild.
Can you record him secretly?
Yeah, I'm going to try to
but then he never gets close enough.
He walks too far away.
He also has been singing
to me this week.
What's her name?
Staring at the blank page
big volume.
Natasha Bedingfield. Up and up. I always think it's what's her name staring at the blank page big volume
open up
I always think it's
someone else
someone else
that was the soundtrack
to the hills
wasn't it
I loved it
the hills was so good
what a tune
what a tune
how does Colby know that song
they play it at school
do they
yeah
why
it's not only
does he beatbox
he's like
feel the rain on your eyes, gayness.
What a cool dude.
Honestly, I didn't give it enough justice there.
He's actually really fucking phenomenal.
You need to mic him up and get it on camera.
I know, honestly.
You need to fit a wire on him.
Even though we are in the school holidays,
we're a little bit backdated as to catching up with each other, aren't we?
Yeah.
So transition days.
What is that?
It's a very scary time.
It's a very scary time for everybody across the board.
I saw you talking about it on Instagram and I didn't know what you were talking about.
You tuned out.
You were like, here she goes again.
Zoned out.
40,000 dots across her Instagram.
I'm checking out.
Yeah.
If it's more than five, I'm out.
Yeah.
Laters, bitch.
I mean, basically, transition day is the day where they go to meet their new teacher.
And also, not many schools or sorry sorry it's not a generic thing as to
schools blend in the classrooms so some schools blend them some schools don't so we basically
mixed all the year group up which i think is great i think it's really great ready for secondary
school so they mix it all up and then the next year there'll be a different mix of children in
the different mix of children and a brand new teacher. Right. Why do I do that?
The teacher is obviously you only get grade teachers.
Yeah. So you get like a second.
But why do they mix up the kids?
Because mine was like the same class going all the way through school.
Yes.
Mine wasn't.
Mine was always mixed.
And I think they do it ready for you.
One, you get to meet every child.
Yeah.
And two, I think when you go up to secondary school, because you go from 60 children to
about 300 in your year group.
I think it's just a good way to understand different types of people yeah different mannerisms different
different cultures different religions like different ways of life like there's so many
different things and like colby comes home from a lunchtime and he'll speak to us about random
things that him and his friends have spoken about and i just think i truly think it's phenomenal
like i really love it i think it's a good idea but what if they're not with their like closest
friend that they've had colby isn't he didn't get nobody and that's quite he didn't get his
best friend do you know what i thought he was not going to take it very well i truly thought he was
going to take it awfully so like with the whole day led up and he was like i hope i get this
teacher i hope i get my best friend caleb but if not i hope i get my other friends and i was like yeah like i don't see why you're not going to like blah blah
blah blah so the transition day come first off we picked dotty up she come out and she was like
i got my teacher she couldn't give a shit about anything else all she wanted was the one teacher
which was understandable i was expecting it from her but to be fair she is oblivious she's not
bothered or phased by anything
that's going on around her she takes everything like a little sponge yeah whereas colby's a little
bit more sensitive or i should say has been a little bit more sensitive growing up obviously
since he's been doing his football he's found this new he found confidence he's a baddie honestly
um he went into his transition day and he was like oh i hope i get my teacher and i hope i get caleb
come out and he was like smiling away and beaming i was like yes we got everything we wanted and he
goes i didn't get the teacher okay and he was like don't worry i got a phenomenal teacher though
she's half canadian she's been 21 countries i was like 21 countries she was he was like she's great
i love her i think she's wonderful i was like oh okay not the teacher did you get caleb no so he got no friends double whammy so he has like a group of eight friends in
his classroom well i say eight friends in his classroom he's got about four or five that are
his besties in his classroom he maybe got one friend that's maybe not his bestie but he got one
friend of his little group okay so he's not
like on his own he's not fully on his own but he doesn't have his buds bud you know yeah and i was
like and then i was kind of a little bit like oh should i speak to the teacher should i not and i
thought you know what he's come out happy all we can do is try the year and see how it goes but
also boys tend to get a little bit silly and if you're not with your buds buds you've got no
opportunity to be silly maybe you're concentrating i think think you'll thrive yeah i think it's going to be great
and i said even more so how exciting is it to go and find your friends at lunchtime yeah and have
a chinwag yeah that's true actually yeah i think it seems like quite hard early on but they'll get
to know new people and actually like you're right that's a good skill for life isn't it because
you're not always going to be with your best your best pal you're not always going to be with your
best pal so it was it was done we could all breathe and it was all done
and it was good to just get it over over and done with yeah yeah like i'm glad that that there was a
process i think if there was no process and it was kind of like we weren't involved because i was like
do i want to know or do i not want to know and obviously you have to know but i was like it's a
big process and it's a lot to go through.
Yeah.
But it's done now.
It's a bit of a lottery, isn't it?
You never know what you're going to get.
No, you don't know what you're going to get.
So it's just been a wind down week.
We're still on the garden.
Yeah, still.
The garden's still.
How's that going?
It's not in bloom.
It's not in bloom.
Do you know what?
It hasn't stopped bloody raining.
That's why.
It hasn't stopped raining.
And to be honest, I wish it fucking stopped
because then I could lay some turf and water the fuck out of it lay some pipe
yeah is it turf turd i think labor i think laying pipe means slang for having sex none of that going
on fucking hell no we're not laying any pipe in the garden especially we're vanilla i'm vanilla
baby i'll chug you but i don't know do? You need to get your lawn down while it's raining and it'll grow really well.
No, I don't know.
Is it from TikTok?
No, it's global.
It's in the charts.
It's on the radio.
No, I don't know.
What's number one at the moment?
I don't know what's in the charts.
Oh, I wouldn't go that far.
I don't know what's in the charts.
I'm a grandma.
I've been trying to listen to Radio 1 to make me cool and young, but I don't know any of the music.
Why are you saying calling young?
Like you're,
you're putting us down with the same age.
I know,
but you are calling young.
You're young at heart.
And I'm,
I'm your Radio 1,
I'm more Radio 2.
I'd say you're smooth FM.
Yeah.
I love smooth or to be on brand magic.
Oh yeah. That's very on brand for you i love a bit
of magic do you yeah mellow magic i see my my go-to i feel like we should name our number one
to eights on the stereo car car stereo buttons oh yeah okay so my number one is capital reloaded
oh okay yeah absolute your first one well oh that's who you were. Oh, I have to say that. Sorry. That's who I normally work for.
Absolute radio.
What a choice.
No, but it has to be by the numbers.
So number one is radio one.
That's how disappointed she is with your choice.
She's not a fan.
Mine's capital reloaded, my number one.
What's yours, Sadie?
Really?
Sadie, do you think that?
Honestly?
Back on the boobie?
Keep you quiet?
Back on their boobs.
Back on the boob again.
On the boob again.
She's on the boob again.
So no, my number one is Capital Reloaded.
Love that.
Reloaded.
I like History.
History's my second.
And then I do have Capital Extra as my number three.
That's quite cool and like young and hip.
Then number four is probably something like, I only listen to one, two, three.
Yeah, you don't need more than that really, do you?
Four is maybe Kiss.
Yeah.
Might have four Kiss.
Smooth FM is my number eight.
Smooth.
Because when you're in the car and you just want to. And Magic. Late Night Lovers in the Dark. Yeah. Might have four kiss. Smooth FM is my number eight. Smooth. Because when you're in the car and you just want to.
And magic.
Late night lovers in the dark.
Yeah.
Smooth FM.
Late night love songs.
This is all your late night lovers.
Love.
There's a lot of lovers in the dark,
isn't there?
Yeah.
Not us.
People are doing it in the dark.
Not us.
I'm not doing it in the dark.
Emma's doing it during the day
with the lights on.
And the blinds open.
Socks on.
Ha ha. But anyway, that was pointless knowledge
that you didn't really need to know, really.
No, I like to know these things about you.
I feel like it gives me an insight into my brain.
Yeah, a more rounded picture of the person that you are.
Anywho.
Anywho, we digressed about a pointless old shit
and Maz has got to edit this, so that's great for Maz.
But yeah, my week's been okay.
I feel like I'm just
poodling along now.
Poodling along.
It was the last bit
before the school holidays.
Yeah,
and now you're in it.
Yeah,
we're into the thick of it.
Full soup.
Into the thick of it.
Ugh.
Doodalooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolool Trenching through the bush That was lockdown TikTok though Oh I wouldn't know No
You know me
What were you doing in lockdown?
Not looking at TikTok
Do you know what I was doing actually?
Such I don't think we've spoken about before
Drinking cocktails
Puzzles
I got really into puzzles in lockdown
Did you?
Thousand pieces
Puzzles and running
Puzzles and running
I did a lot of
And drinking
And eating
It was a great time in my life actually
It was actually a phenomenal time.
It was nice.
But for some it was incredibly sad.
It was so incredibly sad.
Caveat.
But yes, how has your week been?
Yeah, we've just been, obviously we had our week from hell where it was my birthday and
Stefan left us all for five days.
And my mum and dad's social schedule was too lit to come and help me.
They were.
And your sister's where they at?
Well, one of them's got a newborn herself.
Yes, she has.
And my other sister's very hard to tie down to things
because she is a dancer and her schedule is very changeable.
All over the place.
So she might be doing things last minute.
She can't really commit to things.
Is that your baby sister?
Middle.
Oh, is it?
I'm the baby.
You are the baby.
I'm the baby.
I knew that as well.
The middle sister. The older sister's the one that's had the baby five weeks after sadie she's got that's her
second baby her second baby her second baby and um and yeah hayley's the dancer so she's you can't
really pin her down you know you can't she's a busy gal she's busy she often gets commitments
in last minute so you can't really tie her down to things. What kind of dance does she do? All sorts.
Does she?
Yeah.
Like just anything really.
Just loads of stuff. And that's her full time job?
That's her full time job.
I know.
Phenomenal.
Isn't that cool?
That's so cool.
Yeah.
So cool.
So that's her.
So yeah.
And Joseph's been giving me a bit of jip going down to bed actually.
Still.
Which is, it's just not fun. fun like he finds when people say like oh my
toddler will come up with all these things at bedtime like they're suddenly thirsty they suddenly
need a snack like all this but when you watch it don't you joke and go my child would never do i
used to be like oh my god i'm so lucky he goes down to bed an absolute dream no now he's started
being like mommy and he'll say things like he keeps saying i want to go to max's house
that's his little friend max i'm like okay we'll go play with max soon and i'll close the door and
he goes mommy and i feel bad not i feel bad ignoring him so i'm like in and out there like
a bloody yo-yo he's like i want to go and eat cake at max's house the sentence gets more elaborate
each time he tries to get me back in the room and then he's like mommy you know that game where you have to say like i'm going on holiday and i'm
taking that's joseph i want to go to max's house eat cake play in the pool play with sand next time
you're coming i want to go to max's house exactly play the yes watch tv have dinner yeah that's
exactly it it strings me along more and more each time but um he is just absolutely cracking me up
at the moment like he is coming out with some absolute clangers he's got a real sassy toddler
attitude oh like the other day i was playing hide and seek with him but he wants us to hide in a
place that he knows yes because you can't hide in a place you can't deviate that's very common for
babies yeah he doesn't want a surprise he wants to know where you are yeah so i hid and then is
does he do it does he pretend pretend like he knows you're there?
You've told him you're there.
Oh, yeah.
But then he pretends, goes, oh, where's mommy?
Where's mommy?
Yes.
He likes us to hide behind his little craft table.
And the other day I dared to hide in a different place
because I thought I'll make it more exciting.
I'll jump out at him.
And he goes, hide behind the little table, I said.
Okay, sorry.
He keeps saying to me, don't talk to daddy, talk to me.
Oh, yeah.
No talking daddy.
I love that he just knows his own little mind, doesn't he?
So he's really putting me through my paces at the moment.
Yes, he is.
You know how they get.
But I feel like it's more noticeable when you have somebody else
because sadie's got so much of your time yeah it is more noticeable yeah yeah he's wanting a bit
more attention and that's okay and that's obviously natural so natural but sometimes i am like shut up
and go to sleep this is bedtime yeah and also i'm really nervous about him waking because i'm trying
to get sadie into a routine i'm really nervous about like I'll finally get her after after rocking her for like 40 minutes and then Joseph goes mommy and I'm like it's when the other two come
in and I've got because Renly's going for a spout of crying at the moment he's just very very he's
he's got a lot going on with him and he's very emotional he's very hit and miss and up and down
um and it's when you just get him settled and then chris goes on the school run they come back from the school and they walk through the door
i always worried having a newborn that it would be the newborn waking the toddler up but it's
more likely the other way around and it's actually driving me crazy at the moment you got this shit
you got this down to a t i just keep telling myself this too shall pass everything's a phase
and there's going to be a time when you look back at
this and you won't know when it was the last time that it was all okay like one day it's just going
to click do you know what i do find reassuring going through it the second time around is that
i know it will end whereas like when i was in the midst of the sleep issues with joseph i was just
like oh my god i don't know like when this is going to end and i don't know what to do and
it will it will end well now I know it will,
so I'm a bit more chilled about it.
It's like labour.
Yeah.
Oh, why, Bjorn?
I could help at that in Clopant.
Because you're a mother of three children
and you're tired?
And you get up at five o'clock in the morning?
I'm going to say to you,
it's not that I'm exhausted of the children.
I was saying this to Maddy on the train this morning.
It's not that I'm exhausted because of the children.
I get loads of sleep. I have a great night's sleep. I'm very lucky and very fortunate. All right, run it in. But I was going this to Maddie on the train this morning. It's not that I'm exhausted because of children. I get loads of sleep.
I have a great night's sleep.
I'm very lucky and very fortunate.
But I was going to say,
I think it's because the other two are so much bigger
and I can do story time and say to them,
right, we need to settle down now.
So the house winds down at the same time,
which is great for me because then I just go to bed.
But it's just everything.
It's just everything.
Like we've taken Colby to football most nights of
the week i've got to once they're at school i've got to get the washing done do the dishwasher
prepare something for dinner get the food shop in make sure everything's stacked make sure the beds
are made the beds are clean the baths clean there's just so much and i know everybody has the
same jobs but i just feel like i'm it's times three yeah now what's chris like is he pretty
good and then i've got to throw in feeding renners now because he has his food yeah he has his dinner so i've got to get that into the mix chris is great
but it's just it's just that thing and i don't don't want to ever be the the bashing type because
that's not i would never ever put him down i'm so incredibly grateful that i get to have chris home
but it's just it's just not the way i would do it and i find that a little bit infuriating yeah
i'm totally with you and i'm so grateful for him and i i'm it and i find that a little bit infuriating yeah i'm totally with you
and i'm so grateful for him and i am trying my best to take a vaccine so do you know what it's
just a bed like who gives a shit if the corners aren't tucked in like he's helped out and he's
done the job for me so i'm trying my best and that's a me issue well is it literally biological
that men can't make the bed as well as women do no no they just don't try i just don't think they have that much care
like i was saying this this morning like women are crazy like women are yeah but truly mad like
men are so simple you just feed them water them change them that's it yeah they're just they're
just easy girls we are we are so complex like why am i putting so much pressure on myself for a bed
to be made a certain way?
Look, who gives a shit?
Like, I went through a phase at the start of ironing.
Now, couldn't give a fuck.
I'm not ironing.
Turn your knickers inside out and wear them again.
I haven't got time to wash them.
Like, you know?
I'm not even washing them.
Turn your boxers in the other way.
You can get four wears out of them.
Backfront, reverse backfront, you know?
No, but it does piss me off.
Like, people joke about how much I slag Stefan off.
And obviously, I do think it's great.
Otherwise I wouldn't be married to him.
But also I am sometimes just like, can you not just do stuff like well to my level?
Yeah.
See, and why are we putting that pressure on ourselves?
Why do we want it?
I think like, even if he doesn't think making the bed well is important, like it should
be important to him if he thinks it's important to me.
And that's the argument we always have.
He'll be like, it's not a big deal.
And I'm like, but if it's a big deal to me and you care about me, you should try and do it properly.
Do you know what I mean?
That's a lot of pressure though.
I think if he's made the beds for me, he knows that it makes me.
Not for you.
This is the problem I always make.
I'll be like, oh, thanks for hanging out the washing for me.
And then I'm like, not for me.
This is the whole household's washing.
And just because I'm the one that normally does it, it's suddenly a big treat when stefan does it and i'm like no
i do that shit all the time i think i say for me because i asked chris to do them yeah so i say to
him can you get the washing out because his brain just doesn't instinctively go to get it out it's
annoying and then i'm like oh thanks for doing that for me or if i leave something on the side
and it's mine and he puts it away for me i'm like oh thank you for doing that for me so it's not necessarily that he's doing a job that is everybody's responsibility but he if
i ask and say oh i haven't had time to do the dishwasher could you do that for me i know what
you mean but i really try and get out of the habit of being like thank you for doing that for me
because i'm like this is the whole household's day i know but then he doesn't say he does the
same to me he's like thanks for cooking lunch for me or thanks for sorting out the washing for me like he constantly is saying to me and i think sometimes i gotta let
it go i love the beds being made does he make them to my standards no but are the beds made yeah shut
the fucking door i'm only going to climb back in it in seven hours i should let it go but i can't
because i'm a pet no but we're all different aren't we we're all different so i'm trying to be
i'm me personally i'm just trying to be a little bit more chill yeah i'm trying to be a little bit more chill because the house is busy and i just don't want
to waste my energy on arguing with with him as to he didn't he didn't press and steam the sheet
i know i know i know but you know when people are like oh just soak it up with your newborn
have cuddles on the sofa forget about the laundry and the cooking that's what i've done for five
months that can wait for another day and i'm like no it fucking can't because then my house
will be a pigsty that is my house i've got washing falling out of my fucking ass i never cook any tea
other than ordering a takeaway and i snuggle my baby all the time on the sofa yeah good for you
because it's my last baby and i'm never going to get this opportunity again yeah the washing will
still fucking be there tomorrow i'll probably still be there in three weeks time let's be brutally honest
my overriding memories will be hanging the washing out that is my life that's that's my life i just
hang so yeah life's busy so i don't think it's necessarily that i'm busy because it's the three
children i'm busy with just everything in life and then trying to work around everything it's a lot
it's a lot it is but a lot. It is a lot.
It is.
But we're getting there.
But we come here and we drink Prosecco
and we celebrate our birthdays.
So that's all we,
we've got to be grateful for those things.
We're living.
We are L-I-V-I-N.
Right now,
right,
this is a good follow on from this,
isn't it?
Because now we've had this little rant,
this is a great lead up for this.
So can we just mention
the Secret Mum Club, Sunday Soak? have you listened to it yet yeah it can happen girl
you best get home lock yourself in the bathroom and have some chill out time listen i need to and
let me tell you it is making me feel so serene if you haven't listened to it yet head to our
podcast feed and look for the episode before this one and And let us know if you have listened to it,
whether you were relaxing in the bath or out for a drive.
However you listened, drop us a line.
You can find us on TikTok and Instagram.
Just search for Secret Mum Pod.
Or you can email us hello at secretmumpod.com.
It's time.
It's time.
To face the music.
Do you remember that used to be the beginning of X Factor?
No. That's like the soundtrack to your Saturday night, isn't it? that used to be the beginning of X Factor no that's like the
soundtrack to your
Saturday night
isn't it
used to be
mine's fun house
it's a whole lot of fun
prizes to be won
use your body
and your brain
if you want to
win the game
it's a real crazy show
that was patched up
wasn't it
yeah
what a ledge
anywho
should we hit up
the correspondence corner
yes
let's do it this is a
erratic episode today yeah we're all over the place we are all over it all right this one says
hey ladies i'm a first time mummy to esme who is now 12 weeks old oh my gosh i want to know your
thoughts about introducing the potty at a young age i'm hoping to introduce the potty at six
months it's been proven that there are so many benefits of starting before they are one including fewer nappies and apparently if you try to get
them to poo on the potty first then getting them dry fully is so much easier what do you think from
kaylee i'm really interested in this because you know i knew you were going to say this and it's
all over social media at the moment i am not an advocate for this you know who popularized it i
feel like katherine ryan the comedian i don't know i just don't know how i feel about it i really really don't know how i
feel about it i feel like one you have this tiny human it's not only learning the ways of themselves
in this world and they're going through so much mentally and absorbing so much in the day i just
don't know how i feel with just chucking my baby
onto a potty like i followed the lead of the other two i do believe that colby and dotty
they were done really quickly we were seven days and we were done they both went off of
their own lead they stopped when they were ready um i just don't know if i want to
i don't want to word it like i'm being like i like to give my opinions on things but i don't
want to be disrespectful for the people that do like it like the thought of it and i think it's
great if you can do it and it works for you i just think it's a lot of unnecessary stress
for them i i'm really interested by it because i feel like society has told us like
toilet train when your child is like two or three and And that's just the way you should do it.
But I've heard that it can be really successful to get them used to the idea really early on of not being in a wet nappy, not being in a dirty nappy.
And obviously there's a reason why people do it is because it has worked.
But this is them in two months time.
I mean, I'm saying it's not for me.
Would you not?
but this is them in two months time i i mean i'm saying it's not for me like would you not i'm not going to do it but i'm really interested by how it how it does work and and also how such a young
baby can be trained into being toilet trained so early on like i just think it's fascinating
peed and pooed inside of us like freely yeah they come out now yes they wear a nappy but they freely
poo and pee inside yeah in a nappy they don't have to hold it they don't have to make themselves uncomfortable they don't have to think
anything other than just letting it go but i do also understand on the other foot about them going
to preschool and the pressure of preschool having to change the nappies and there is now um and
again everybody's entitled to their own opinions we obviously have
one baby that started well one child that started school when he just turned four
and one that started school when she was fully five yeah um and obviously as we're colby started
potty training and he went through and he he done it in a week i also do feel like there isn't many
children that are at that stage and that is okay because everybody has their own abilities as to whether they're getting there
but we're also going up to school and nowadays i think there's a lot of like talking about things
like this i feel like there's not enough talk on when our children go back to school how tired
they get with regards to them wetting the beds and things like that and i just don't think doing it at such a young age like the uncomfortableness like imagine now your four
year old who start in school who's stressed out with everything like that they know how awful they
feel when they wet the bed and how awful they are if they have an accident and i get that schools
don't want to have that responsibility but not everybody is always ready and i just think
putting that onto these tiny people
when all they want to do is learn to roll over, learn to sit up.
But I think like, are the babies even thinking about it that much?
Like if you can just get them...
They would have to think about it to hold it.
They would, but it's almost like muscle memory, isn't it?
Like I actually think doing it younger...
Do you want to try it, Sadie?
What are you saying? Do you want to give it a go?
Do you want to give it a go?
I'm actually feeling a lot of pressure
around this at the moment because lots of Joseph's
peers and babies who we know who are
his age are toilet trained
or they've either just started the process or they're
fully toilet trained already. A lot of babies
that were born around the same time as him and me
and Stefan are nowhere near
thinking about starting to do it with Joseph and I'm like
oh we go out now and like all
his little friends are in pants and he's still in nappies and like they've all got their little porta potties
and we're still changing his nappy like i already feel like oh he's falling behind a little bit but
he's not showing many signs that he's ready and i just think oh we did it when he was one when
colby was one we introduced a potty when he was one. See, I think that's quite it. We just used to put it in the garden.
But when he could walk to it himself, that was, I put the potty out and I started introducing
the potty when Colby could walk.
When he could walk to the potty on his own and sit himself down through his own accord.
Like I didn't want to have to just keep placing him on the potty and place him on the potty.
Also, I didn't want him crawling off of the potty.
And if he had had a wee, flick the potty everywhere.
So it was kind of just, we put the potty out and we put one next to the toilet one in the garden and we were just like if he can walk to the potty then great so we
introduced it at one and then he gave the potty up when dotty was born so he was two part of me
thinks it would be easier to get them to do it when they're not too like set in their ways already
because obviously like by keeping them in nappies until they're two or three we're teaching them
you poo and wee in a nappy yeah whereas if he'd already known i poo and wee on the toilet
then we'd be there already i just feel like it's a lot like there's people it's a lot when you do
it anyway like my friends that are doing it at the moment they're like it's quite hard and stressful
and it's like our least favorite part of parenting so far because every 15 minutes when they're out they're like do you want to sit
on the potty do you need a wee they go through five outfit changes a day because they're weeing
and pooing themselves yeah i don't know maybe i was lucky because we never had any never had any
accidents if anything we've had accidents now that they're older like dot c has more accidents now
because she'll be tired from school and stuff like that and she'll have an accident or she doesn't make it to the toilet quick enough about needing yeah yeah so i'd say that more so
now she has accidents but no i don't know i think we maybe were just really lucky i think it just
depends on the child as well like stefan's sister didn't do her kids until they were like three
and i remember at the time people being like oh they're they're late to be uh toilet trained
because i think people think like they hit two and you should start it and um she said they literally like they were so ready that they picked
it up like straight away so quickly so i think whatever obviously is right for your family but
i am really fascinated by this doing it really early thing because i just think babies are like
sponges they can learn stuff so quick yeah and actually from six months how would you so then
how would you do it would you just hold them them on their... You just have to hold them.
But how do you know when they're going to go?
I don't know.
We need more information.
Because there is lots of talk about it on social media at the moment.
And there is people that do say,
oh, I'm potty training my six-month-old.
It just blows my mind.
I know.
I would love it if we could do it with her.
Would you?
Yeah.
I mean, I actually think it's harder work for the parents than the babies. The babies aren't really thinking about it. But parent you've got to be like right when are they gonna wee when are they gonna poo i guess you could do it when they're in the
high chair so if they're sat in a high chair you could put a potty under the high chair and take
their nappy off yeah and just let them freely poo and pee poo and wee how do they know they're going
in there though i i don't know because colby, used to get up and look in the potty
and he'd be like, are we in the potty?
This is why I'm so fascinated by it
because it's almost like they're just learning it
without even really thinking about it.
Has anybody done it?
Has anyone actually had success with it?
Yeah, had success with a six-month-old baby.
I'm really intrigued.
And also, if you're using disposable nappies,
it's so much better for the environment.
Of course.
Because you're not throwing away loads of nappies.
No, I get that.
We're up to our eyeballs in nappies at the moment. I bet you are. Two babies disposable nappies, it's so much better for the environment. Of course. Because you're not throwing away loads of nappies. No, I get that. We're up to eyeballs in nappies at the moment.
I bet you are.
Two babies in nappies.
I bet you are.
I just don't know how I...
Does Sadie wee in the bath?
No.
Well, I can't really tell because she's under the water, but Joseph started weeing in the
bath.
I know, I see.
Renly wees in the bath.
As soon as I put him in the bath, he wees.
Joseph does as well.
Maybe I should put a bit of water in the potty,
sit his bum on it,
and then the water might entice him to have a wee.
Yeah, try it with him.
I mean, he's already so advanced.
I'm sure he would pick it up straight away.
I love how you're telling me,
yeah, you do it.
I'm not going to do it.
I had visions of toilet training Joseph over the summer
so he could be with no clothes on.
We haven't had a summer,
so I haven't been able to do it.
No, we haven't.
It's been raining every day.
It has.
It has, my love.
But please, if you have had any great success from
this let us know let us know i want to know if anybody's got an actually fully fully potty
trained six month old yeah also where do you buy pants for babies yeah do they just wear clothes
with no pants no nappy there's just so much so many questions i can't i can't i don't have any questions. I can't. I can't. I don't. I'm definitely on the fence. I would not say I agree or disagree.
I just, I don't know if it's a lot of unnecessary stress for us and the baby.
You know?
But thank you.
Very interesting.
I don't think, I don't feel like we helped you at all there.
Sorry, Kayleigh.
Yeah.
I don't think we gave you any advice.
Good luck.
We just had a discussion among ourselves.
Yeah.
Yes.
Good for you, but I'm not going to be doing it.
Well, I don't know.
If you can convince me, Kayleigh, I'll give it a try.
No.
Imagine me toilet training two babies at the same time.
I've got enough on my plate.
You have.
You've got a lot on your plate.
All right.
We've got one from Terry here.
It says, hey, ladies, I was listening to you talking about pregnancy reveals,
and I thought I'd share mine.
Oh, yes.
I took my husband back to where we got married for a picnic,
bundled up all the tests I had taken in a
little scarf and presented it to him. He was so
excited. Plus it saved me from getting
him a prezzy that year. Oh
that's really lovely. I thought you were going to
say he collected your wee. I thought she was
when she said bundled up I thought she was going to say bundled him
up in the back of the car. Buried him
in a picnic
blanket. Put him in the boot. He stole my piss and in a picnic blanket put him in the food he stole my
piss and gave me the pregnancy test myself i still i'm not over that i know that's that's
baffling the husband surprising the wife yeah it stole her pee but do you know what a lot of people
did say actually on the comments on that post is that they also don't flush their wheeze in the
night oh if it's yellow let it me know if it's brown flush it down yeah so we weren't alone
well in my house we just don't flush fuck all we just leave it all there not me personally the wheeze in the night. Oh, if it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down. Yeah. So we weren't alone.
Well, in my house,
we just don't flush fuck all.
We just leave it all there.
Not me personally,
the children.
Leave the turds.
Chris doesn't leave it either.
That would be weird.
Just the kids. I've never left
an absolute turd.
Why don't they
flush their poos?
They're just not bothered.
Disgusting!
Disgusting.
And I was wondering
if I could flush a toilet
after you had a shit.
Well, it was fucking one of yours.
At least it gives you an excuse to say that multiple times a day.
Or just Dotsie who sings out,
Chanel, she's an African grey.
She sings it all the time, shouts it all the time.
Chanel.
So you can get in touch with us on anything at all.
Yep, it can be serious or silly and you can be totally anonymous.
Because between us, we've probably heard it before.
And remember, Sadie's in this one with us.
Sadie, you ready?
In three, two, one.
We're all in this together.
And we know that we are.
We're all stars and we see that.
Oh.
Nothing?
No.
Tough crowd.
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This is The Secret Mum Club, the safe space for us to share our secrets.
And here is my secret of the week.
I don't actually know if I've told you this
but did I tell you
that Colby's moved
football groups
no he's been signed
by another team
transfer window
transfer window
he was in the transfer window
and we moved
we took a little shifty over
where have you gone
Man United
Man U
no Man City
no
we haven't
obviously I don't want to say
the team
but we've gone from one team
to another team
we did actually leave the previous team.
Hang on.
So did he get like scouted?
No.
Yes and no.
We actually know the person of the team
and he'd mentioned to us a couple of times,
look, if Colby's looking for a new team,
we'd love him to come and try for us.
And we were like, oh no, he's happy where he is.
You know, don't mix business and pleasure.
And it got to a point where, do you know,'t mix business and pleasure um and it got to a point
where do you know Colby made the biggest decision that I think and again it the boy the boy blows
my mind as to phenomenal decisions that he makes like he's so open and honest and he knows his own
mind he knows what he wants to do and it just got to the last couple of games and he was like do you
know what mom I just don't enjoy it I don't enjoy playing with the team. It's not where I want to be.
And I was like, do you know what, regardless of if we sign for a new team
or we don't, we know that we don't want to sign with this team
for another season.
So it came with a really heavy heart because there were some of the players
we loved on the team, but there was just one or two that we just weren't,
Colby wasn't gelling with them and it was becoming a little bit hostile.
And I just thought, you know what?
Best thing we can do, get the fuck out of here.
So he made the decision
and we followed his lead completely.
He just said he doesn't want to do it anymore.
He doesn't want to be in that team.
I said to him, you know, let's not do,
let's not sign up.
Let's not do anything.
Let's just do your private coach and go at that.
And then we were at his private coach and he said and the our friend said are you ready to come and try for us yet and we thought
you know what we've got nothing to lose now we're not signing for our old team so we signed up and
it's a lovely little team so i feel like we are becoming football whores where we just get i get
an a for the show we have we have i'm to lie. Maybe it's us with the problem, you know.
Hi, it's me. I'm the problem.
It's me. We have moved around
a little bit, but he's with a lovely little team now.
And we've had a couple of games
of football, but it was more so,
the secret was more so that he
solely made the decision all on his own.
Like there was nothing on us.
I said to Chris, we can't have any input
in this. He's saying he doesn't want to do it anymore along with the the transition of school like him just being
absolutely fine with the whole transition he's just making decisions do you ever just think like
i've basically got a teenager now it just honestly blows my mind and like from colby like five-year-old
colby six-year-old colby this is just like a whole new that leap seems massive
between like five and seven i would say even six to seven yeah virgin on we're coming eight so the
biggest year for him is going from six to seven he has changed or maybe seven to yeah maybe you're
right maybe some sort of six to eight is his biggest transition he should change so much
he just sort of fly it just makes these incredible decisions like he's doing really well in school like his spellings are doing really
great dotsy bless her heart she's just not she's not there and we've only done one year at school
yeah but we did talk about this a lot on my instagram in the sense of the transition days
the two children are both very very different children colby is very sensitive
very kind very calming although he has his crazy moments he's very keeps himself to himself he's
not really ever been outside of the box where dotty is the other end of the spectrum she is
wild she has no filter she doesn't give a shit she will take anybody out if anybody hurts her
brother as well i think she'll she'll take your
kneecaps is that a second child thing because people keep warning me about the wild second
child and i'm scared i don't know if it's the second child i'm the crazy one of my family and
i'm the third yeah true but again twins so it's like it's like a false really yeah false second
child yeah two for the price of one yeah but no she's she's crazy and she has she has a little
bit of a tough year bless her so i'm a
little bit nervous about dotty going up into year one because it comes a little bit more academic
academic and she's not a little bit less playing she hasn't found her people yet so she's not got
herself a little solid friend she is not that she's struggling at all she's doing great she just isn't
it's just not her place does she like going to school
loves going to school well that's absolutely adore school they both adore school but it's just not
her and we talked about this a lot and there was a lot of people said that maybe your own childhood
trauma is what is affecting yeah because you were talking about this on your instagram the other day
how like you loved school for the social aspect of it but didn't necessarily love the learning part of going to school that's going to be dotty as well hard to
say she's only done reception yeah hard to say she has only done reception but she reads incredibly
well she is writing probably maybe just under or where she should be she's a little bit she's just
she finds writing really boring and she's exactly like me, but she just is,
she's picking up things that I would have never picked up at her age. And again, we talked about, you know, my dyslexia
and I really struggled in school.
It was a really, really sad place.
Is dyslexia genetic?
People say it is genetic.
It is.
And my dad's dyslexic.
Is he?
Yeah, which I didn't know probably up until I was about 20
that my dad was dyslexic.
Did he know?
Yeah, yeah, my dad's always known.
I think my dad didn't talk about it or tell us because he just didn't want us to know or for us to have
a reason to doubt ourselves yeah um so yeah it's been it's been a little bit of a journey this year
with the babies and if I'm honest I'll be glad to see the end of this school year not in a bad way
only purely because I'm so excited for their next journey yeah like I'm so excited for what the next
the next stage of their lives have to offer to them yeah but yeah I just feel like he's making such
big decisions I know what a guy it feels really really strange and it's a really weird position
for me to be in and the fact that I've got a seven-year-old nearly eight who's making all
these decisions but I also have a new baby I know it's a really really hard I'm really struggling
to process it in my head at the moment it's such a big adjustment because i've just been like fully in the baby
era for two and a half years but it's like such a different and i feel like having the two comparisons
of one that's so big and one that's so little yeah like it's really like it's a real fucking
it's a real head fuck you've got to be a jack of all trades you really do and you've got to switch
from like you talk to a baby and then
you've got to switch to okay we've got to do homework and we're learning spellings and i'm
shit with all that stuff anyway so getting into all of that as well it's it's a wild one then we
got to go to football then she wants to start trying out for dance track like it's it's mad
you're gonna be a cheer mom a soccer mom and a soft play mom a soft play mom mom of a newborn
jack of all trades master of fuck all.
But no, it wasn't really much of a secret this week.
It was more just to...
Just a little insight into life.
Yeah.
It's a wild journey.
And I think maybe my own personal experience
does maybe alter the way I process their school experience.
Yeah.
But I would never project that onto them.
No.
But no, yeah, we've joined a new football team.
We've had a couple of friendlies.
And we're loving life.
Oi, oi.
Oi, oi.
So that's my secret.
Not really a secret, just more of an update.
Now let's get into some of yours.
So you ready?
We've got three secrets we're going to be discussing this week.
So Emma, hit us with number one.
All right.
Hi, Emma and Safina.
During labour with my youngest, who is one day younger than Renly,
I let out a massive fart that my other half doesn't let me live down.
Get down with the trumpet.
Yeah, yeah.
What made it even funnier was the midwife's face,
who was squatting down to see how my labour was progressing.
Oh, they must see it all though, those midwives.
Seconds after releasing this fart, my little Reuben appeared very quickly
that both the midwives in the room
didn't have a chance to put gloves on quickly enough.
It was a fart-induced labour.
Did something similar happen to you?
I wish I farted when the baby came out.
You were pooing, weren't you?
Pooing?
Weren't you pooing a lot in Reuben's labour?
I got diarrhoea.
I took too much laculose, didn't I?
And I got severe diarrhoea.
That's what I'm saying.
I said, I'm either going to shit myself
or this baby's coming out. And then you shit the baby out? Really quick? Yeah,ose, didn't I? And I got severe diarrhea. That's what I'm saying. And I said, I'm either going to shit myself or this baby's coming out.
And then you shit the baby out?
Really quick?
Yeah, but it didn't shit.
It didn't shit on the bed.
You didn't pee yourself?
No, I didn't pee myself.
Oh, well done.
I know.
She says, keep the podcast coming.
I thoroughly enjoy it.
Chloe.
Oh, Chloe, I can't believe you farted out Reuben.
What an absolute little delight.
And he's a day younger than Renna.
Oh, little Reubs.
Congratulations.
I know, I do love little Reubs. I like the name Reuben.. Aww, little Rubes. Congratulations. I know,
I do love little Rubes.
I like the name Ruben.
I love the name Ruben.
It's the name of a sandwich,
isn't it?
What?
A Ruben sandwich.
Is it?
Yeah,
what is it?
Like pastrami,
mustard and pickles?
Something like that.
Colby's Colby Jack cheese.
Colby Jack?
It's Colby Jack.
It's a cheese.
We were going to have Jack
for a boy.
Were you?
What was your boy name if you said
he was a boy?
Ellis.
Ellis, yeah.
I grew up with a boy
called Ellis.
It's hard when you know someone with that name, isn't it?
And I feel like I know so many people with so many
names. We liked loads to be fair
but here we are.
Thank you Chloe and congratulations. God you, Chloe. And congratulations.
God bless you,
Chloe.
And congratulations.
And I hope Ruben's doing really,
really well.
Bless him.
Should we go in for number two?
Let's.
This one says,
Hey ladies,
I'm a first time mum to a gorgeous nine week old baby girl.
My label was pretty straightforward,
but OMG,
why does no one talk about the pushing?
I was under the impression you would feel it mainly in the vagina,
but no one told me.
Hold on.
Where have you been?
Because I've spoken about this.
Yeah, have you not been listening to this podcast?
Sorry about her.
She's not...
She doesn't get out much.
I said to you, they tell you to push like you're pushing for a poo,
and it's not a poo.
It's the bit in the middle.
The perineum.
It's the bit in the middle, and you can't push to push like you're pushing.
You know when you really need a wee,
and you're desperately full up, and you're bladdering, and you need wee and you're desperately full up and you're bladdering you need a push and the wee comes out really
really fast it's not that push it's also not pushing for a poo it's the bit in between in
the between she says no one told me that my arsehole would feel like it had a massive rock
in it yeah because you're not meant to push your bum yeah that's why you get tears isn't it yeah
she says i was calm the whole time until i had been pushing for two and a half hours. My partner, mum and midwife were so reassuring and kept yelling, we can see the head.
At one point I shouted back, shut the fuck up.
You've been saying that for hours.
Fair.
Those last few pushes genuinely felt like my butt was splitting into two.
I remember grabbing my midwife and telling her, oh my God, my body is broken into two.
When speaking to friends and family about my birth,
that was the first thing I said to them
and they all felt the same thing.
That's first baby.
That's the first baby bum push.
I can't resonate with this
because I never got to that point of pushing.
When you're pushing your first baby,
you don't know where to push.
Although your body tells you where to push,
but you have your midwife like,
make sure you push like you're having a poo.
And it's not.
And you honestly feel like you're going to shit every single organ out of your body did
you not feel that with the second and third no no dotsy renly's was probably my most painful
with the other two i had gas and air renly uh colby's her in the sense i was pushing in the
wrong place the completely wrong pace and i didn't really feel much other than just my
asshole feeling like it's falling out dots hers was, hers was like a dream, but I was high as a fucking kite.
I was, woo!
I was so far out there, there was no way of getting me back.
I took the gas and air.
She was like, right, on the next contraction, Safina, we're going to push.
So she'd go, take a big breath of gas and air.
And then she was like, right, contraction's coming.
And I'd be like, oh, it's gone.
And then she was like, okay, take some more gas and air, and then we'll go right contractions coming i'd be like oh it's gone oh and then she was like
um okay take some more gas and air and then we'll go on the next one so i just uh it's coming it's
going to go oh she was like oh i think we've had enough gas and air you are so fucking high
it's like they tell you when to push when they can't feel and then renly's i felt everything
and that boy wanted out he was done he was like get me the fuck out of it and he just went top to bottom shut out but they can't feel what your body feels so
like the fact that they're telling you when to push is mad isn't it and your body as your body's
contracting so you have contractions but suddenly once you're fully dilated is then when your body
tells you to push yeah and i don't want to be that arsehole that says your body will tell you
when it's ready it truly does but you have this contraction which is obviously your cervix dilating and
the baby moving down and further down and then when you're ready to push the baby
your body will tell you and you do like this because your body is like bearing down yeah
because you're down there now and you need to push and you just got this overwhelming pushing
sensation but the the pushing comes and goes so
like the contraction in waves and then you let it go and the pain stops and the contraction comes
and you push so your body is naturally doing it whereas mine didn't really was just i was like
and it just wasn't stopping i was like oh it's going on she was like no don't be so
yeah because you knew what it was supposed to feel like third baby
and I had
I'd gone too far
for gas in there
I'm kind of intrigued
to like
know what it's like
I'm gonna have to do it again
third baby
oh god
I've said it before
and I'll say it again
V-back
yeah people that have
pushed a baby out
of their vagina though
god respect
I still can't believe
I've pushed three out
I can't
and it still looks normal
well
give or take a few things
give or take a few hemorrhoids
in my asshole all right ready for the last one yes it says hi safina and emma i was listening
to the episode with the newly pregnant lady who was wetting herself every time she had morning
sickness and i wanted to write in with my own secret last year i was fortunate enough to go
to new york with some of my girlfriends, we were staying in the Hamptons.
I know, right?
How fancy pants am I?
She actually says that.
Does she?
Yeah, that's really fancy pants.
The last thing we did before heading back to our accommodation was take a boat tour,
which took us past the Statue of Liberty.
This is where it gets dicey.
Oh.
It was a joyous trip.
The wind was whipping through my hair.
I was super happy.
Then I started to feel weird and realized that I had inhaled a bug.
I started to cough and splutter and eventually I threw up in my own mouth. I swallowed it down as
I didn't want to vomit on myself. I crashed towards the bathroom and I barely closed the
door before vomiting in the toilet. But there was a special twist. My pelvic floor gave way and I
pissed myself on the floor. I had to take my shorts and knickers off and try
God all whilst going past the Statue of Liberty. What a trip. I had to try and dry my shorts and
knickers off and dry the piss stains on a boat in the middle of the Hudson in front of the Statue
of Liberty. I'm sure Lady Liberty must have the same issues. Much love Sarah in Southampton.
My girl from my hometown. That's how the girls in Southampton do it.
You've got to do it in style.
Honestly, do it in style.
That does sound like the kind of thing that would happen to you.
Yeah, it does.
Slash girls from Southampton.
Yeah, you're wild.
You're a different breed.
Oh my goodness.
Sarah.
Sarah, I hope you can look back at this and laugh now.
You laugh now, but...
We laugh with you
At the time
You went Nicholas
In front of Lady Liberty
Yeah
With your
And your shorts as well
Would have been okay
If it was a dress maybe
Yeah I wonder what she did
But she inhaled a fly
And then she had to put
Her damp pants back on
The smell of dry clothes
And piss
Oh
It's not the one
Bless her heart
Oh well thank you for that
Thank you for sharing
I literally laughed
At that had no involvement
With any children either
No Just send it You don't even have to have children to listen to this podcast
oh it's free for everybody wild i want to do a girl's trip to the hamptons can we do that
secret mom club life aim high who are we gonna take you and me yeah not the babies
you can't leave sadie. She needs your boob.
She can come.
Fine. She can come.
You can come.
Fine.
Thank you for sharing your secrets this week.
Everyone is welcome in the Secret Mum Club.
If you'd like to share your secrets with us, you can.
The email is hello at secretmumpod.com or with Secret Mum Pod on TikTok and Instagram.
Have you had a double whammy?
I thought I was going to say double whammy.
You're funny. What? Shake your whammy? I thought I was going to say double whammy. You're funny.
What?
Shake your whammy, funny, funky song.
Have you had a double whammy in front of the Statue of Liberty?
Or have you experienced a fart-induced labour?
Let us know.
There really is nothing too outrageous.
And keep an eye out for our Thursday episode and our next Sunday Soak.
And we'll see you next time on the Secret Mum Club.
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