Secret Mum Club with Sophiena - The Gassy Labour

Episode Date: July 29, 2024

There are a lot of ways to induce labour but in this episode, we hear one mum's new, smellier method. Sophiena and Emma chat about the realities of potty training and organising the household, and we ...have a wonderful pregnancy reveal story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:47 Acast.com Don't cry for me, Argentina The truth is I never left you All through my wild days My magic sisters. They kept their promise. Isn't it my mad existence? I thought it was my magic sisters.
Starting point is 00:01:17 Hello. This is the Secret Mum Club. I'm Safina. And I'm Emma. And this is a podcast. It is a podcast. This is a podcast. And it's also.
Starting point is 00:01:24 It's also. This podcast is a safe space for mums everywhere. Safe space to share our secrets. Because we all have secrets, don't we? And as we know, sharing is caring. You don't even have to tell us who you are. You can keep that to yourself. You can be anonymous. And those secrets can, hey-o.
Starting point is 00:01:41 Those secrets can be serious or silly. All secrets are welcome in the secret mum club there's proof that everyone thinks it's just copied and pasted every week and it's not it's live and direct we record it every single episode yeah the same intro intro intro same intro intro sounds better doesn't it it's mad that we're still messing it up 53 episodes in. Yeah. It's been a year now. Also, like, Bikerless, when people laugh at me for calling them Bikerless.
Starting point is 00:02:12 Cyclists. Bikerless sounds so much better. Intro sounds better than intro. You should change it. Enter. Yeah. Enter. Enter.
Starting point is 00:02:20 Enter. One time, show time, hook line, let's roll, let's ride. I made a slightly jump there. You did literally scare the shit out of her. When I's roll, let's ride. I may have slightly jumped there. You did literally scare the shit out of her. When I was younger, I used to think I was Alicia Dixon from Mystique. She's one of a kind, ain't she? Here we go again upon the rainbow's ride. Here we go again upon the rainbow's ride.
Starting point is 00:02:34 Let me start again, let me pip you. I got one thing to say to you today. How many times have you led someone astray? How many times have you said I'm gone away, gone away? It's a brand new day. We got it going on. Well done. I thought I'd let you have that moment.
Starting point is 00:02:47 That was solid. I've needed to get that out since I was 14. Have you? That was your moment. This is my moment. This is my perfect moment with you. This is now a singing pod. Honestly, I think we should have a karaoke episode.
Starting point is 00:03:03 We should go out and do karaoke. On live. Should we do it live? Yes. Come and tune into us live. Imagine if we did a live show and no one turned up. Just be you, me. That's a mood killer.
Starting point is 00:03:14 And the babies. I think we should go to Lucky Voice. Because there's not many like, you know. Britain's Got Talent. Yeah. Hello. Aim high. You know when you go to karaoke though and people are like scared about
Starting point is 00:03:25 showing off and they're like oh no i don't want to take the mic i don't want to say again no stop it don't make me say i do it and then i'm like me and you are on a level where we could just be ourselves yeah yeah i thought we could tell me about your week what the fuck has been going on i don't even know to be fair we had jabbies i don't think i've told you about that we had jabs third jabbies took them like a champ i've told you about that. Third jabs. Third jabbies. Took them like a champ. I thought they injected them with happy serum. And it was fine.
Starting point is 00:03:49 Literally, first one in his leg didn't even cry. You're choking. No. This is the same baby that struggled with them. Because the second one was really bad, wasn't it? And then second one in the other leg cried a little bit, then started laughing. I was a little bit psychotic. He's a sadist.
Starting point is 00:04:03 I was a little bit scared for myself. Two days after, absolutely great. Then he cried. Oh. From like day three. Onwards. Until now. Until now, he hasn't really stopped.
Starting point is 00:04:13 Because he had a bad reaction to the second batch of jabs, didn't he? Yeah, I probably worded it wrong. He didn't have a bad reaction. He took them great. It didn't affect him. No. He just cried. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:23 Which is very, very poorly. Yeah. And upset. Had a temperature and stuff. he took them great it didn't affect him no he just cried yeah which is very very poorly and upset had a temperature and stuff and the first and third are meant to be the worst because it's meningitis i never know which ones are when i think it's the first and the second uh the first and the third because it's the big one because they only have one injection on the second but on the first and second they have two one in each leg she had two on a second and the rotavirus still right don't don't again again last episode don't listen to emma this episode don't listen to me don't take any advice from what we're talking
Starting point is 00:04:51 about probably or maybe he did have two in his legs because i feel like they do the first one and they're like they cry and then on the second one it's like even worse because they're like you've done me dirty you've done the second one was bad done the double and then the third one i'm dreading it because we've got our third batch coming up and Stefan's away that night. You're going to be great. It's going to be savage. You're going to smash it.
Starting point is 00:05:11 I think you're going to be absolutely tremendous. Tremendous. Tremendous. When the crowds say, boat selector. Yeah. I was going to say, I just hope Joseph sleeps that night
Starting point is 00:05:21 because he's been really... Would you like to see Craig David live? Mugging me off with bedtime. I would love to see Craig David. Sorry, I just thought we'd put that out there just for a second yeah it's like the soundtrack to my like teenagers yeah yeah and he's from savampton is he yeah he is represent represent represent you know colby has a really really insane um talent in beatboxing like he's wild like I feel like I try to record him all the time but he says no.
Starting point is 00:05:45 Too shy. Like the karaoke situation. No, don't. He's actually phenomenal. He makes so many noises at one time it's actually wild. Can you record him secretly?
Starting point is 00:05:53 Yeah, I'm going to try to but then he never gets close enough. He walks too far away. He also has been singing to me this week. What's her name? Staring at the blank page big volume.
Starting point is 00:06:04 Natasha Bedingfield. Up and up. I always think it's what's her name staring at the blank page big volume open up I always think it's someone else someone else that was the soundtrack to the hills wasn't it
Starting point is 00:06:13 I loved it the hills was so good what a tune what a tune how does Colby know that song they play it at school do they yeah
Starting point is 00:06:20 why it's not only does he beatbox he's like feel the rain on your eyes, gayness. What a cool dude. Honestly, I didn't give it enough justice there. He's actually really fucking phenomenal.
Starting point is 00:06:30 You need to mic him up and get it on camera. I know, honestly. You need to fit a wire on him. Even though we are in the school holidays, we're a little bit backdated as to catching up with each other, aren't we? Yeah. So transition days. What is that?
Starting point is 00:06:42 It's a very scary time. It's a very scary time for everybody across the board. I saw you talking about it on Instagram and I didn't know what you were talking about. You tuned out. You were like, here she goes again. Zoned out. 40,000 dots across her Instagram. I'm checking out.
Starting point is 00:06:53 Yeah. If it's more than five, I'm out. Yeah. Laters, bitch. I mean, basically, transition day is the day where they go to meet their new teacher. And also, not many schools or sorry sorry it's not a generic thing as to schools blend in the classrooms so some schools blend them some schools don't so we basically mixed all the year group up which i think is great i think it's really great ready for secondary
Starting point is 00:07:17 school so they mix it all up and then the next year there'll be a different mix of children in the different mix of children and a brand new teacher. Right. Why do I do that? The teacher is obviously you only get grade teachers. Yeah. So you get like a second. But why do they mix up the kids? Because mine was like the same class going all the way through school. Yes. Mine wasn't.
Starting point is 00:07:33 Mine was always mixed. And I think they do it ready for you. One, you get to meet every child. Yeah. And two, I think when you go up to secondary school, because you go from 60 children to about 300 in your year group. I think it's just a good way to understand different types of people yeah different mannerisms different different cultures different religions like different ways of life like there's so many
Starting point is 00:07:55 different things and like colby comes home from a lunchtime and he'll speak to us about random things that him and his friends have spoken about and i just think i truly think it's phenomenal like i really love it i think it's a good idea but what if they're not with their like closest friend that they've had colby isn't he didn't get nobody and that's quite he didn't get his best friend do you know what i thought he was not going to take it very well i truly thought he was going to take it awfully so like with the whole day led up and he was like i hope i get this teacher i hope i get my best friend caleb but if not i hope i get my other friends and i was like yeah like i don't see why you're not going to like blah blah blah blah so the transition day come first off we picked dotty up she come out and she was like
Starting point is 00:08:34 i got my teacher she couldn't give a shit about anything else all she wanted was the one teacher which was understandable i was expecting it from her but to be fair she is oblivious she's not bothered or phased by anything that's going on around her she takes everything like a little sponge yeah whereas colby's a little bit more sensitive or i should say has been a little bit more sensitive growing up obviously since he's been doing his football he's found this new he found confidence he's a baddie honestly um he went into his transition day and he was like oh i hope i get my teacher and i hope i get caleb come out and he was like smiling away and beaming i was like yes we got everything we wanted and he
Starting point is 00:09:09 goes i didn't get the teacher okay and he was like don't worry i got a phenomenal teacher though she's half canadian she's been 21 countries i was like 21 countries she was he was like she's great i love her i think she's wonderful i was like oh okay not the teacher did you get caleb no so he got no friends double whammy so he has like a group of eight friends in his classroom well i say eight friends in his classroom he's got about four or five that are his besties in his classroom he maybe got one friend that's maybe not his bestie but he got one friend of his little group okay so he's not like on his own he's not fully on his own but he doesn't have his buds bud you know yeah and i was like and then i was kind of a little bit like oh should i speak to the teacher should i not and i
Starting point is 00:09:54 thought you know what he's come out happy all we can do is try the year and see how it goes but also boys tend to get a little bit silly and if you're not with your buds buds you've got no opportunity to be silly maybe you're concentrating i think think you'll thrive yeah i think it's going to be great and i said even more so how exciting is it to go and find your friends at lunchtime yeah and have a chinwag yeah that's true actually yeah i think it seems like quite hard early on but they'll get to know new people and actually like you're right that's a good skill for life isn't it because you're not always going to be with your best your best pal you're not always going to be with your best pal so it was it was done we could all breathe and it was all done
Starting point is 00:10:28 and it was good to just get it over over and done with yeah yeah like i'm glad that that there was a process i think if there was no process and it was kind of like we weren't involved because i was like do i want to know or do i not want to know and obviously you have to know but i was like it's a big process and it's a lot to go through. Yeah. But it's done now. It's a bit of a lottery, isn't it? You never know what you're going to get.
Starting point is 00:10:49 No, you don't know what you're going to get. So it's just been a wind down week. We're still on the garden. Yeah, still. The garden's still. How's that going? It's not in bloom. It's not in bloom.
Starting point is 00:10:59 Do you know what? It hasn't stopped bloody raining. That's why. It hasn't stopped raining. And to be honest, I wish it fucking stopped because then I could lay some turf and water the fuck out of it lay some pipe yeah is it turf turd i think labor i think laying pipe means slang for having sex none of that going on fucking hell no we're not laying any pipe in the garden especially we're vanilla i'm vanilla
Starting point is 00:11:20 baby i'll chug you but i don't know do? You need to get your lawn down while it's raining and it'll grow really well. No, I don't know. Is it from TikTok? No, it's global. It's in the charts. It's on the radio. No, I don't know. What's number one at the moment?
Starting point is 00:11:35 I don't know what's in the charts. Oh, I wouldn't go that far. I don't know what's in the charts. I'm a grandma. I've been trying to listen to Radio 1 to make me cool and young, but I don't know any of the music. Why are you saying calling young? Like you're, you're putting us down with the same age.
Starting point is 00:11:50 I know, but you are calling young. You're young at heart. And I'm, I'm your Radio 1, I'm more Radio 2. I'd say you're smooth FM. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:01 I love smooth or to be on brand magic. Oh yeah. That's very on brand for you i love a bit of magic do you yeah mellow magic i see my my go-to i feel like we should name our number one to eights on the stereo car car stereo buttons oh yeah okay so my number one is capital reloaded oh okay yeah absolute your first one well oh that's who you were. Oh, I have to say that. Sorry. That's who I normally work for. Absolute radio. What a choice. No, but it has to be by the numbers.
Starting point is 00:12:30 So number one is radio one. That's how disappointed she is with your choice. She's not a fan. Mine's capital reloaded, my number one. What's yours, Sadie? Really? Sadie, do you think that? Honestly?
Starting point is 00:12:48 Back on the boobie? Keep you quiet? Back on their boobs. Back on the boob again. On the boob again. She's on the boob again. So no, my number one is Capital Reloaded. Love that.
Starting point is 00:13:01 Reloaded. I like History. History's my second. And then I do have Capital Extra as my number three. That's quite cool and like young and hip. Then number four is probably something like, I only listen to one, two, three. Yeah, you don't need more than that really, do you? Four is maybe Kiss.
Starting point is 00:13:20 Yeah. Might have four Kiss. Smooth FM is my number eight. Smooth. Because when you're in the car and you just want to. And Magic. Late Night Lovers in the Dark. Yeah. Might have four kiss. Smooth FM is my number eight. Smooth. Because when you're in the car and you just want to. And magic. Late night lovers in the dark. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:29 Smooth FM. Late night love songs. This is all your late night lovers. Love. There's a lot of lovers in the dark, isn't there? Yeah. Not us.
Starting point is 00:13:36 People are doing it in the dark. Not us. I'm not doing it in the dark. Emma's doing it during the day with the lights on. And the blinds open. Socks on. Ha ha. But anyway, that was pointless knowledge
Starting point is 00:13:48 that you didn't really need to know, really. No, I like to know these things about you. I feel like it gives me an insight into my brain. Yeah, a more rounded picture of the person that you are. Anywho. Anywho, we digressed about a pointless old shit and Maz has got to edit this, so that's great for Maz. But yeah, my week's been okay.
Starting point is 00:14:04 I feel like I'm just poodling along now. Poodling along. It was the last bit before the school holidays. Yeah, and now you're in it. Yeah,
Starting point is 00:14:11 we're into the thick of it. Full soup. Into the thick of it. Ugh. Doodalooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolooloolool Trenching through the bush That was lockdown TikTok though Oh I wouldn't know No You know me What were you doing in lockdown? Not looking at TikTok
Starting point is 00:14:29 Do you know what I was doing actually? Such I don't think we've spoken about before Drinking cocktails Puzzles I got really into puzzles in lockdown Did you? Thousand pieces Puzzles and running
Starting point is 00:14:39 Puzzles and running I did a lot of And drinking And eating It was a great time in my life actually It was actually a phenomenal time. It was nice. But for some it was incredibly sad.
Starting point is 00:14:49 It was so incredibly sad. Caveat. But yes, how has your week been? Yeah, we've just been, obviously we had our week from hell where it was my birthday and Stefan left us all for five days. And my mum and dad's social schedule was too lit to come and help me. They were. And your sister's where they at?
Starting point is 00:15:07 Well, one of them's got a newborn herself. Yes, she has. And my other sister's very hard to tie down to things because she is a dancer and her schedule is very changeable. All over the place. So she might be doing things last minute. She can't really commit to things. Is that your baby sister?
Starting point is 00:15:20 Middle. Oh, is it? I'm the baby. You are the baby. I'm the baby. I knew that as well. The middle sister. The older sister's the one that's had the baby five weeks after sadie she's got that's her second baby her second baby her second baby and um and yeah hayley's the dancer so she's you can't
Starting point is 00:15:35 really pin her down you know you can't she's a busy gal she's busy she often gets commitments in last minute so you can't really tie her down to things. What kind of dance does she do? All sorts. Does she? Yeah. Like just anything really. Just loads of stuff. And that's her full time job? That's her full time job. I know.
Starting point is 00:15:52 Phenomenal. Isn't that cool? That's so cool. Yeah. So cool. So that's her. So yeah. And Joseph's been giving me a bit of jip going down to bed actually.
Starting point is 00:16:01 Still. Which is, it's just not fun. fun like he finds when people say like oh my toddler will come up with all these things at bedtime like they're suddenly thirsty they suddenly need a snack like all this but when you watch it don't you joke and go my child would never do i used to be like oh my god i'm so lucky he goes down to bed an absolute dream no now he's started being like mommy and he'll say things like he keeps saying i want to go to max's house that's his little friend max i'm like okay we'll go play with max soon and i'll close the door and he goes mommy and i feel bad not i feel bad ignoring him so i'm like in and out there like
Starting point is 00:16:36 a bloody yo-yo he's like i want to go and eat cake at max's house the sentence gets more elaborate each time he tries to get me back in the room and then he's like mommy you know that game where you have to say like i'm going on holiday and i'm taking that's joseph i want to go to max's house eat cake play in the pool play with sand next time you're coming i want to go to max's house exactly play the yes watch tv have dinner yeah that's exactly it it strings me along more and more each time but um he is just absolutely cracking me up at the moment like he is coming out with some absolute clangers he's got a real sassy toddler attitude oh like the other day i was playing hide and seek with him but he wants us to hide in a place that he knows yes because you can't hide in a place you can't deviate that's very common for
Starting point is 00:17:19 babies yeah he doesn't want a surprise he wants to know where you are yeah so i hid and then is does he do it does he pretend pretend like he knows you're there? You've told him you're there. Oh, yeah. But then he pretends, goes, oh, where's mommy? Where's mommy? Yes. He likes us to hide behind his little craft table.
Starting point is 00:17:34 And the other day I dared to hide in a different place because I thought I'll make it more exciting. I'll jump out at him. And he goes, hide behind the little table, I said. Okay, sorry. He keeps saying to me, don't talk to daddy, talk to me. Oh, yeah. No talking daddy.
Starting point is 00:17:54 I love that he just knows his own little mind, doesn't he? So he's really putting me through my paces at the moment. Yes, he is. You know how they get. But I feel like it's more noticeable when you have somebody else because sadie's got so much of your time yeah it is more noticeable yeah yeah he's wanting a bit more attention and that's okay and that's obviously natural so natural but sometimes i am like shut up and go to sleep this is bedtime yeah and also i'm really nervous about him waking because i'm trying
Starting point is 00:18:19 to get sadie into a routine i'm really nervous about like I'll finally get her after after rocking her for like 40 minutes and then Joseph goes mommy and I'm like it's when the other two come in and I've got because Renly's going for a spout of crying at the moment he's just very very he's he's got a lot going on with him and he's very emotional he's very hit and miss and up and down um and it's when you just get him settled and then chris goes on the school run they come back from the school and they walk through the door i always worried having a newborn that it would be the newborn waking the toddler up but it's more likely the other way around and it's actually driving me crazy at the moment you got this shit you got this down to a t i just keep telling myself this too shall pass everything's a phase and there's going to be a time when you look back at
Starting point is 00:19:05 this and you won't know when it was the last time that it was all okay like one day it's just going to click do you know what i do find reassuring going through it the second time around is that i know it will end whereas like when i was in the midst of the sleep issues with joseph i was just like oh my god i don't know like when this is going to end and i don't know what to do and it will it will end well now I know it will, so I'm a bit more chilled about it. It's like labour. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:28 Oh, why, Bjorn? I could help at that in Clopant. Because you're a mother of three children and you're tired? And you get up at five o'clock in the morning? I'm going to say to you, it's not that I'm exhausted of the children. I was saying this to Maddy on the train this morning.
Starting point is 00:19:42 It's not that I'm exhausted because of the children. I get loads of sleep. I have a great night's sleep. I'm very lucky and very fortunate. All right, run it in. But I was going this to Maddie on the train this morning. It's not that I'm exhausted because of children. I get loads of sleep. I have a great night's sleep. I'm very lucky and very fortunate. But I was going to say, I think it's because the other two are so much bigger and I can do story time and say to them, right, we need to settle down now.
Starting point is 00:19:54 So the house winds down at the same time, which is great for me because then I just go to bed. But it's just everything. It's just everything. Like we've taken Colby to football most nights of the week i've got to once they're at school i've got to get the washing done do the dishwasher prepare something for dinner get the food shop in make sure everything's stacked make sure the beds are made the beds are clean the baths clean there's just so much and i know everybody has the
Starting point is 00:20:17 same jobs but i just feel like i'm it's times three yeah now what's chris like is he pretty good and then i've got to throw in feeding renners now because he has his food yeah he has his dinner so i've got to get that into the mix chris is great but it's just it's just that thing and i don't don't want to ever be the the bashing type because that's not i would never ever put him down i'm so incredibly grateful that i get to have chris home but it's just it's just not the way i would do it and i find that a little bit infuriating yeah i'm totally with you and i'm so grateful for him and i i'm it and i find that a little bit infuriating yeah i'm totally with you and i'm so grateful for him and i am trying my best to take a vaccine so do you know what it's just a bed like who gives a shit if the corners aren't tucked in like he's helped out and he's
Starting point is 00:20:54 done the job for me so i'm trying my best and that's a me issue well is it literally biological that men can't make the bed as well as women do no no they just don't try i just don't think they have that much care like i was saying this this morning like women are crazy like women are yeah but truly mad like men are so simple you just feed them water them change them that's it yeah they're just they're just easy girls we are we are so complex like why am i putting so much pressure on myself for a bed to be made a certain way? Look, who gives a shit? Like, I went through a phase at the start of ironing.
Starting point is 00:21:28 Now, couldn't give a fuck. I'm not ironing. Turn your knickers inside out and wear them again. I haven't got time to wash them. Like, you know? I'm not even washing them. Turn your boxers in the other way. You can get four wears out of them.
Starting point is 00:21:38 Backfront, reverse backfront, you know? No, but it does piss me off. Like, people joke about how much I slag Stefan off. And obviously, I do think it's great. Otherwise I wouldn't be married to him. But also I am sometimes just like, can you not just do stuff like well to my level? Yeah. See, and why are we putting that pressure on ourselves?
Starting point is 00:21:56 Why do we want it? I think like, even if he doesn't think making the bed well is important, like it should be important to him if he thinks it's important to me. And that's the argument we always have. He'll be like, it's not a big deal. And I'm like, but if it's a big deal to me and you care about me, you should try and do it properly. Do you know what I mean? That's a lot of pressure though.
Starting point is 00:22:13 I think if he's made the beds for me, he knows that it makes me. Not for you. This is the problem I always make. I'll be like, oh, thanks for hanging out the washing for me. And then I'm like, not for me. This is the whole household's washing. And just because I'm the one that normally does it, it's suddenly a big treat when stefan does it and i'm like no i do that shit all the time i think i say for me because i asked chris to do them yeah so i say to
Starting point is 00:22:33 him can you get the washing out because his brain just doesn't instinctively go to get it out it's annoying and then i'm like oh thanks for doing that for me or if i leave something on the side and it's mine and he puts it away for me i'm like oh thank you for doing that for me so it's not necessarily that he's doing a job that is everybody's responsibility but he if i ask and say oh i haven't had time to do the dishwasher could you do that for me i know what you mean but i really try and get out of the habit of being like thank you for doing that for me because i'm like this is the whole household's day i know but then he doesn't say he does the same to me he's like thanks for cooking lunch for me or thanks for sorting out the washing for me like he constantly is saying to me and i think sometimes i gotta let it go i love the beds being made does he make them to my standards no but are the beds made yeah shut
Starting point is 00:23:13 the fucking door i'm only going to climb back in it in seven hours i should let it go but i can't because i'm a pet no but we're all different aren't we we're all different so i'm trying to be i'm me personally i'm just trying to be a little bit more chill yeah i'm trying to be a little bit more chill because the house is busy and i just don't want to waste my energy on arguing with with him as to he didn't he didn't press and steam the sheet i know i know i know but you know when people are like oh just soak it up with your newborn have cuddles on the sofa forget about the laundry and the cooking that's what i've done for five months that can wait for another day and i'm like no it fucking can't because then my house will be a pigsty that is my house i've got washing falling out of my fucking ass i never cook any tea
Starting point is 00:23:54 other than ordering a takeaway and i snuggle my baby all the time on the sofa yeah good for you because it's my last baby and i'm never going to get this opportunity again yeah the washing will still fucking be there tomorrow i'll probably still be there in three weeks time let's be brutally honest my overriding memories will be hanging the washing out that is my life that's that's my life i just hang so yeah life's busy so i don't think it's necessarily that i'm busy because it's the three children i'm busy with just everything in life and then trying to work around everything it's a lot it's a lot it is but a lot. It is a lot. It is.
Starting point is 00:24:25 But we're getting there. But we come here and we drink Prosecco and we celebrate our birthdays. So that's all we, we've got to be grateful for those things. We're living. We are L-I-V-I-N. Right now,
Starting point is 00:24:37 right, this is a good follow on from this, isn't it? Because now we've had this little rant, this is a great lead up for this. So can we just mention the Secret Mum Club, Sunday Soak? have you listened to it yet yeah it can happen girl you best get home lock yourself in the bathroom and have some chill out time listen i need to and
Starting point is 00:24:55 let me tell you it is making me feel so serene if you haven't listened to it yet head to our podcast feed and look for the episode before this one and And let us know if you have listened to it, whether you were relaxing in the bath or out for a drive. However you listened, drop us a line. You can find us on TikTok and Instagram. Just search for Secret Mum Pod. Or you can email us hello at secretmumpod.com. It's time.
Starting point is 00:25:19 It's time. To face the music. Do you remember that used to be the beginning of X Factor? No. That's like the soundtrack to your Saturday night, isn't it? that used to be the beginning of X Factor no that's like the soundtrack to your Saturday night isn't it used to be
Starting point is 00:25:29 mine's fun house it's a whole lot of fun prizes to be won use your body and your brain if you want to win the game it's a real crazy show
Starting point is 00:25:38 that was patched up wasn't it yeah what a ledge anywho should we hit up the correspondence corner yes
Starting point is 00:25:44 let's do it this is a erratic episode today yeah we're all over the place we are all over it all right this one says hey ladies i'm a first time mummy to esme who is now 12 weeks old oh my gosh i want to know your thoughts about introducing the potty at a young age i'm hoping to introduce the potty at six months it's been proven that there are so many benefits of starting before they are one including fewer nappies and apparently if you try to get them to poo on the potty first then getting them dry fully is so much easier what do you think from kaylee i'm really interested in this because you know i knew you were going to say this and it's all over social media at the moment i am not an advocate for this you know who popularized it i
Starting point is 00:26:23 feel like katherine ryan the comedian i don't know i just don't know how i feel about it i really really don't know how i feel about it i feel like one you have this tiny human it's not only learning the ways of themselves in this world and they're going through so much mentally and absorbing so much in the day i just don't know how i feel with just chucking my baby onto a potty like i followed the lead of the other two i do believe that colby and dotty they were done really quickly we were seven days and we were done they both went off of their own lead they stopped when they were ready um i just don't know if i want to i don't want to word it like i'm being like i like to give my opinions on things but i don't
Starting point is 00:27:07 want to be disrespectful for the people that do like it like the thought of it and i think it's great if you can do it and it works for you i just think it's a lot of unnecessary stress for them i i'm really interested by it because i feel like society has told us like toilet train when your child is like two or three and And that's just the way you should do it. But I've heard that it can be really successful to get them used to the idea really early on of not being in a wet nappy, not being in a dirty nappy. And obviously there's a reason why people do it is because it has worked. But this is them in two months time. I mean, I'm saying it's not for me.
Starting point is 00:27:44 Would you not? but this is them in two months time i i mean i'm saying it's not for me like would you not i'm not going to do it but i'm really interested by how it how it does work and and also how such a young baby can be trained into being toilet trained so early on like i just think it's fascinating peed and pooed inside of us like freely yeah they come out now yes they wear a nappy but they freely poo and pee inside yeah in a nappy they don't have to hold it they don't have to make themselves uncomfortable they don't have to think anything other than just letting it go but i do also understand on the other foot about them going to preschool and the pressure of preschool having to change the nappies and there is now um and again everybody's entitled to their own opinions we obviously have
Starting point is 00:28:26 one baby that started well one child that started school when he just turned four and one that started school when she was fully five yeah um and obviously as we're colby started potty training and he went through and he he done it in a week i also do feel like there isn't many children that are at that stage and that is okay because everybody has their own abilities as to whether they're getting there but we're also going up to school and nowadays i think there's a lot of like talking about things like this i feel like there's not enough talk on when our children go back to school how tired they get with regards to them wetting the beds and things like that and i just don't think doing it at such a young age like the uncomfortableness like imagine now your four year old who start in school who's stressed out with everything like that they know how awful they
Starting point is 00:29:13 feel when they wet the bed and how awful they are if they have an accident and i get that schools don't want to have that responsibility but not everybody is always ready and i just think putting that onto these tiny people when all they want to do is learn to roll over, learn to sit up. But I think like, are the babies even thinking about it that much? Like if you can just get them... They would have to think about it to hold it. They would, but it's almost like muscle memory, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:29:39 Like I actually think doing it younger... Do you want to try it, Sadie? What are you saying? Do you want to give it a go? Do you want to give it a go? I'm actually feeling a lot of pressure around this at the moment because lots of Joseph's peers and babies who we know who are his age are toilet trained
Starting point is 00:29:51 or they've either just started the process or they're fully toilet trained already. A lot of babies that were born around the same time as him and me and Stefan are nowhere near thinking about starting to do it with Joseph and I'm like oh we go out now and like all his little friends are in pants and he's still in nappies and like they've all got their little porta potties and we're still changing his nappy like i already feel like oh he's falling behind a little bit but
Starting point is 00:30:13 he's not showing many signs that he's ready and i just think oh we did it when he was one when colby was one we introduced a potty when he was one. See, I think that's quite it. We just used to put it in the garden. But when he could walk to it himself, that was, I put the potty out and I started introducing the potty when Colby could walk. When he could walk to the potty on his own and sit himself down through his own accord. Like I didn't want to have to just keep placing him on the potty and place him on the potty. Also, I didn't want him crawling off of the potty. And if he had had a wee, flick the potty everywhere.
Starting point is 00:30:48 So it was kind of just, we put the potty out and we put one next to the toilet one in the garden and we were just like if he can walk to the potty then great so we introduced it at one and then he gave the potty up when dotty was born so he was two part of me thinks it would be easier to get them to do it when they're not too like set in their ways already because obviously like by keeping them in nappies until they're two or three we're teaching them you poo and wee in a nappy yeah whereas if he'd already known i poo and wee on the toilet then we'd be there already i just feel like it's a lot like there's people it's a lot when you do it anyway like my friends that are doing it at the moment they're like it's quite hard and stressful and it's like our least favorite part of parenting so far because every 15 minutes when they're out they're like do you want to sit
Starting point is 00:31:27 on the potty do you need a wee they go through five outfit changes a day because they're weeing and pooing themselves yeah i don't know maybe i was lucky because we never had any never had any accidents if anything we've had accidents now that they're older like dot c has more accidents now because she'll be tired from school and stuff like that and she'll have an accident or she doesn't make it to the toilet quick enough about needing yeah yeah so i'd say that more so now she has accidents but no i don't know i think we maybe were just really lucky i think it just depends on the child as well like stefan's sister didn't do her kids until they were like three and i remember at the time people being like oh they're they're late to be uh toilet trained because i think people think like they hit two and you should start it and um she said they literally like they were so ready that they picked
Starting point is 00:32:08 it up like straight away so quickly so i think whatever obviously is right for your family but i am really fascinated by this doing it really early thing because i just think babies are like sponges they can learn stuff so quick yeah and actually from six months how would you so then how would you do it would you just hold them them on their... You just have to hold them. But how do you know when they're going to go? I don't know. We need more information. Because there is lots of talk about it on social media at the moment.
Starting point is 00:32:33 And there is people that do say, oh, I'm potty training my six-month-old. It just blows my mind. I know. I would love it if we could do it with her. Would you? Yeah. I mean, I actually think it's harder work for the parents than the babies. The babies aren't really thinking about it. But parent you've got to be like right when are they gonna wee when are they gonna poo i guess you could do it when they're in the
Starting point is 00:32:51 high chair so if they're sat in a high chair you could put a potty under the high chair and take their nappy off yeah and just let them freely poo and pee poo and wee how do they know they're going in there though i i don't know because colby, used to get up and look in the potty and he'd be like, are we in the potty? This is why I'm so fascinated by it because it's almost like they're just learning it without even really thinking about it. Has anybody done it?
Starting point is 00:33:14 Has anyone actually had success with it? Yeah, had success with a six-month-old baby. I'm really intrigued. And also, if you're using disposable nappies, it's so much better for the environment. Of course. Because you're not throwing away loads of nappies. No, I get that.
Starting point is 00:33:25 We're up to our eyeballs in nappies at the moment. I bet you are. Two babies disposable nappies, it's so much better for the environment. Of course. Because you're not throwing away loads of nappies. No, I get that. We're up to eyeballs in nappies at the moment. I bet you are. Two babies in nappies. I bet you are. I just don't know how I... Does Sadie wee in the bath? No. Well, I can't really tell because she's under the water, but Joseph started weeing in the
Starting point is 00:33:38 bath. I know, I see. Renly wees in the bath. As soon as I put him in the bath, he wees. Joseph does as well. Maybe I should put a bit of water in the potty, sit his bum on it, and then the water might entice him to have a wee.
Starting point is 00:33:48 Yeah, try it with him. I mean, he's already so advanced. I'm sure he would pick it up straight away. I love how you're telling me, yeah, you do it. I'm not going to do it. I had visions of toilet training Joseph over the summer so he could be with no clothes on.
Starting point is 00:33:58 We haven't had a summer, so I haven't been able to do it. No, we haven't. It's been raining every day. It has. It has, my love. But please, if you have had any great success from this let us know let us know i want to know if anybody's got an actually fully fully potty
Starting point is 00:34:10 trained six month old yeah also where do you buy pants for babies yeah do they just wear clothes with no pants no nappy there's just so much so many questions i can't i can't i don't have any questions. I can't. I can't. I don't. I'm definitely on the fence. I would not say I agree or disagree. I just, I don't know if it's a lot of unnecessary stress for us and the baby. You know? But thank you. Very interesting. I don't think, I don't feel like we helped you at all there. Sorry, Kayleigh.
Starting point is 00:34:38 Yeah. I don't think we gave you any advice. Good luck. We just had a discussion among ourselves. Yeah. Yes. Good for you, but I'm not going to be doing it. Well, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:34:47 If you can convince me, Kayleigh, I'll give it a try. No. Imagine me toilet training two babies at the same time. I've got enough on my plate. You have. You've got a lot on your plate. All right. We've got one from Terry here.
Starting point is 00:34:56 It says, hey, ladies, I was listening to you talking about pregnancy reveals, and I thought I'd share mine. Oh, yes. I took my husband back to where we got married for a picnic, bundled up all the tests I had taken in a little scarf and presented it to him. He was so excited. Plus it saved me from getting him a prezzy that year. Oh
Starting point is 00:35:13 that's really lovely. I thought you were going to say he collected your wee. I thought she was when she said bundled up I thought she was going to say bundled him up in the back of the car. Buried him in a picnic blanket. Put him in the boot. He stole my piss and in a picnic blanket put him in the food he stole my piss and gave me the pregnancy test myself i still i'm not over that i know that's that's baffling the husband surprising the wife yeah it stole her pee but do you know what a lot of people
Starting point is 00:35:36 did say actually on the comments on that post is that they also don't flush their wheeze in the night oh if it's yellow let it me know if it's brown flush it down yeah so we weren't alone well in my house we just don't flush fuck all we just leave it all there not me personally the wheeze in the night. Oh, if it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down. Yeah. So we weren't alone. Well, in my house, we just don't flush fuck all. We just leave it all there. Not me personally, the children.
Starting point is 00:35:50 Leave the turds. Chris doesn't leave it either. That would be weird. Just the kids. I've never left an absolute turd. Why don't they flush their poos? They're just not bothered.
Starting point is 00:35:58 Disgusting! Disgusting. And I was wondering if I could flush a toilet after you had a shit. Well, it was fucking one of yours. At least it gives you an excuse to say that multiple times a day. Or just Dotsie who sings out,
Starting point is 00:36:09 Chanel, she's an African grey. She sings it all the time, shouts it all the time. Chanel. So you can get in touch with us on anything at all. Yep, it can be serious or silly and you can be totally anonymous. Because between us, we've probably heard it before. And remember, Sadie's in this one with us. Sadie, you ready?
Starting point is 00:36:28 In three, two, one. We're all in this together. And we know that we are. We're all stars and we see that. Oh. Nothing? No. Tough crowd.
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Starting point is 00:37:33 My dream? To be an international star. Could it happen again? Could Celine Dion happen again? I'm Thomas LeBlanc, and Celine Understood is a four-part series from CBC Podcasts and CBC News, where I piece together the surprising circumstances that helped manufacture Celine Dion, the pop icon.
Starting point is 00:37:56 Celine Understood. Available wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com This is The Secret Mum Club, the safe space for us to share our secrets. And here is my secret of the week. I don't actually know if I've told you this
Starting point is 00:38:25 but did I tell you that Colby's moved football groups no he's been signed by another team transfer window transfer window he was in the transfer window
Starting point is 00:38:32 and we moved we took a little shifty over where have you gone Man United Man U no Man City no we haven't
Starting point is 00:38:40 obviously I don't want to say the team but we've gone from one team to another team we did actually leave the previous team. Hang on. So did he get like scouted? No.
Starting point is 00:38:50 Yes and no. We actually know the person of the team and he'd mentioned to us a couple of times, look, if Colby's looking for a new team, we'd love him to come and try for us. And we were like, oh no, he's happy where he is. You know, don't mix business and pleasure. And it got to a point where, do you know,'t mix business and pleasure um and it got to a point
Starting point is 00:39:05 where do you know Colby made the biggest decision that I think and again it the boy the boy blows my mind as to phenomenal decisions that he makes like he's so open and honest and he knows his own mind he knows what he wants to do and it just got to the last couple of games and he was like do you know what mom I just don't enjoy it I don't enjoy playing with the team. It's not where I want to be. And I was like, do you know what, regardless of if we sign for a new team or we don't, we know that we don't want to sign with this team for another season. So it came with a really heavy heart because there were some of the players
Starting point is 00:39:37 we loved on the team, but there was just one or two that we just weren't, Colby wasn't gelling with them and it was becoming a little bit hostile. And I just thought, you know what? Best thing we can do, get the fuck out of here. So he made the decision and we followed his lead completely. He just said he doesn't want to do it anymore. He doesn't want to be in that team.
Starting point is 00:39:57 I said to him, you know, let's not do, let's not sign up. Let's not do anything. Let's just do your private coach and go at that. And then we were at his private coach and he said and the our friend said are you ready to come and try for us yet and we thought you know what we've got nothing to lose now we're not signing for our old team so we signed up and it's a lovely little team so i feel like we are becoming football whores where we just get i get an a for the show we have we have i'm to lie. Maybe it's us with the problem, you know.
Starting point is 00:40:26 Hi, it's me. I'm the problem. It's me. We have moved around a little bit, but he's with a lovely little team now. And we've had a couple of games of football, but it was more so, the secret was more so that he solely made the decision all on his own. Like there was nothing on us.
Starting point is 00:40:42 I said to Chris, we can't have any input in this. He's saying he doesn't want to do it anymore along with the the transition of school like him just being absolutely fine with the whole transition he's just making decisions do you ever just think like i've basically got a teenager now it just honestly blows my mind and like from colby like five-year-old colby six-year-old colby this is just like a whole new that leap seems massive between like five and seven i would say even six to seven yeah virgin on we're coming eight so the biggest year for him is going from six to seven he has changed or maybe seven to yeah maybe you're right maybe some sort of six to eight is his biggest transition he should change so much
Starting point is 00:41:22 he just sort of fly it just makes these incredible decisions like he's doing really well in school like his spellings are doing really great dotsy bless her heart she's just not she's not there and we've only done one year at school yeah but we did talk about this a lot on my instagram in the sense of the transition days the two children are both very very different children colby is very sensitive very kind very calming although he has his crazy moments he's very keeps himself to himself he's not really ever been outside of the box where dotty is the other end of the spectrum she is wild she has no filter she doesn't give a shit she will take anybody out if anybody hurts her brother as well i think she'll she'll take your
Starting point is 00:42:05 kneecaps is that a second child thing because people keep warning me about the wild second child and i'm scared i don't know if it's the second child i'm the crazy one of my family and i'm the third yeah true but again twins so it's like it's like a false really yeah false second child yeah two for the price of one yeah but no she's she's crazy and she has she has a little bit of a tough year bless her so i'm a little bit nervous about dotty going up into year one because it comes a little bit more academic academic and she's not a little bit less playing she hasn't found her people yet so she's not got herself a little solid friend she is not that she's struggling at all she's doing great she just isn't
Starting point is 00:42:43 it's just not her place does she like going to school loves going to school well that's absolutely adore school they both adore school but it's just not her and we talked about this a lot and there was a lot of people said that maybe your own childhood trauma is what is affecting yeah because you were talking about this on your instagram the other day how like you loved school for the social aspect of it but didn't necessarily love the learning part of going to school that's going to be dotty as well hard to say she's only done reception yeah hard to say she has only done reception but she reads incredibly well she is writing probably maybe just under or where she should be she's a little bit she's just she finds writing really boring and she's exactly like me, but she just is,
Starting point is 00:43:27 she's picking up things that I would have never picked up at her age. And again, we talked about, you know, my dyslexia and I really struggled in school. It was a really, really sad place. Is dyslexia genetic? People say it is genetic. It is. And my dad's dyslexic. Is he?
Starting point is 00:43:38 Yeah, which I didn't know probably up until I was about 20 that my dad was dyslexic. Did he know? Yeah, yeah, my dad's always known. I think my dad didn't talk about it or tell us because he just didn't want us to know or for us to have a reason to doubt ourselves yeah um so yeah it's been it's been a little bit of a journey this year with the babies and if I'm honest I'll be glad to see the end of this school year not in a bad way only purely because I'm so excited for their next journey yeah like I'm so excited for what the next
Starting point is 00:44:03 the next stage of their lives have to offer to them yeah but yeah I just feel like he's making such big decisions I know what a guy it feels really really strange and it's a really weird position for me to be in and the fact that I've got a seven-year-old nearly eight who's making all these decisions but I also have a new baby I know it's a really really hard I'm really struggling to process it in my head at the moment it's such a big adjustment because i've just been like fully in the baby era for two and a half years but it's like such a different and i feel like having the two comparisons of one that's so big and one that's so little yeah like it's really like it's a real fucking it's a real head fuck you've got to be a jack of all trades you really do and you've got to switch
Starting point is 00:44:42 from like you talk to a baby and then you've got to switch to okay we've got to do homework and we're learning spellings and i'm shit with all that stuff anyway so getting into all of that as well it's it's a wild one then we got to go to football then she wants to start trying out for dance track like it's it's mad you're gonna be a cheer mom a soccer mom and a soft play mom a soft play mom mom of a newborn jack of all trades master of fuck all. But no, it wasn't really much of a secret this week. It was more just to...
Starting point is 00:45:11 Just a little insight into life. Yeah. It's a wild journey. And I think maybe my own personal experience does maybe alter the way I process their school experience. Yeah. But I would never project that onto them. No.
Starting point is 00:45:26 But no, yeah, we've joined a new football team. We've had a couple of friendlies. And we're loving life. Oi, oi. Oi, oi. So that's my secret. Not really a secret, just more of an update. Now let's get into some of yours.
Starting point is 00:45:39 So you ready? We've got three secrets we're going to be discussing this week. So Emma, hit us with number one. All right. Hi, Emma and Safina. During labour with my youngest, who is one day younger than Renly, I let out a massive fart that my other half doesn't let me live down. Get down with the trumpet.
Starting point is 00:45:53 Yeah, yeah. What made it even funnier was the midwife's face, who was squatting down to see how my labour was progressing. Oh, they must see it all though, those midwives. Seconds after releasing this fart, my little Reuben appeared very quickly that both the midwives in the room didn't have a chance to put gloves on quickly enough. It was a fart-induced labour.
Starting point is 00:46:11 Did something similar happen to you? I wish I farted when the baby came out. You were pooing, weren't you? Pooing? Weren't you pooing a lot in Reuben's labour? I got diarrhoea. I took too much laculose, didn't I? And I got severe diarrhoea.
Starting point is 00:46:23 That's what I'm saying. I said, I'm either going to shit myself or this baby's coming out. And then you shit the baby out? Really quick? Yeah,ose, didn't I? And I got severe diarrhea. That's what I'm saying. And I said, I'm either going to shit myself or this baby's coming out. And then you shit the baby out? Really quick? Yeah, but it didn't shit. It didn't shit on the bed. You didn't pee yourself?
Starting point is 00:46:31 No, I didn't pee myself. Oh, well done. I know. She says, keep the podcast coming. I thoroughly enjoy it. Chloe. Oh, Chloe, I can't believe you farted out Reuben. What an absolute little delight.
Starting point is 00:46:40 And he's a day younger than Renna. Oh, little Reubs. Congratulations. I know, I do love little Reubs. I like the name Reuben.. Aww, little Rubes. Congratulations. I know, I do love little Rubes. I like the name Ruben. I love the name Ruben. It's the name of a sandwich,
Starting point is 00:46:48 isn't it? What? A Ruben sandwich. Is it? Yeah, what is it? Like pastrami, mustard and pickles?
Starting point is 00:46:56 Something like that. Colby's Colby Jack cheese. Colby Jack? It's Colby Jack. It's a cheese. We were going to have Jack for a boy. Were you?
Starting point is 00:47:04 What was your boy name if you said he was a boy? Ellis. Ellis, yeah. I grew up with a boy called Ellis. It's hard when you know someone with that name, isn't it? And I feel like I know so many people with so many
Starting point is 00:47:19 names. We liked loads to be fair but here we are. Thank you Chloe and congratulations. God you, Chloe. And congratulations. God bless you, Chloe. And congratulations. And I hope Ruben's doing really, really well.
Starting point is 00:47:29 Bless him. Should we go in for number two? Let's. This one says, Hey ladies, I'm a first time mum to a gorgeous nine week old baby girl. My label was pretty straightforward, but OMG,
Starting point is 00:47:40 why does no one talk about the pushing? I was under the impression you would feel it mainly in the vagina, but no one told me. Hold on. Where have you been? Because I've spoken about this. Yeah, have you not been listening to this podcast? Sorry about her.
Starting point is 00:47:52 She's not... She doesn't get out much. I said to you, they tell you to push like you're pushing for a poo, and it's not a poo. It's the bit in the middle. The perineum. It's the bit in the middle, and you can't push to push like you're pushing. You know when you really need a wee,
Starting point is 00:48:03 and you're desperately full up, and you're bladdering, and you need wee and you're desperately full up and you're bladdering you need a push and the wee comes out really really fast it's not that push it's also not pushing for a poo it's the bit in between in the between she says no one told me that my arsehole would feel like it had a massive rock in it yeah because you're not meant to push your bum yeah that's why you get tears isn't it yeah she says i was calm the whole time until i had been pushing for two and a half hours. My partner, mum and midwife were so reassuring and kept yelling, we can see the head. At one point I shouted back, shut the fuck up. You've been saying that for hours. Fair.
Starting point is 00:48:36 Those last few pushes genuinely felt like my butt was splitting into two. I remember grabbing my midwife and telling her, oh my God, my body is broken into two. When speaking to friends and family about my birth, that was the first thing I said to them and they all felt the same thing. That's first baby. That's the first baby bum push. I can't resonate with this
Starting point is 00:48:53 because I never got to that point of pushing. When you're pushing your first baby, you don't know where to push. Although your body tells you where to push, but you have your midwife like, make sure you push like you're having a poo. And it's not. And you honestly feel like you're going to shit every single organ out of your body did
Starting point is 00:49:08 you not feel that with the second and third no no dotsy renly's was probably my most painful with the other two i had gas and air renly uh colby's her in the sense i was pushing in the wrong place the completely wrong pace and i didn't really feel much other than just my asshole feeling like it's falling out dots hers was, hers was like a dream, but I was high as a fucking kite. I was, woo! I was so far out there, there was no way of getting me back. I took the gas and air. She was like, right, on the next contraction, Safina, we're going to push.
Starting point is 00:49:37 So she'd go, take a big breath of gas and air. And then she was like, right, contraction's coming. And I'd be like, oh, it's gone. And then she was like, okay, take some more gas and air, and then we'll go right contractions coming i'd be like oh it's gone oh and then she was like um okay take some more gas and air and then we'll go on the next one so i just uh it's coming it's going to go oh she was like oh i think we've had enough gas and air you are so fucking high it's like they tell you when to push when they can't feel and then renly's i felt everything and that boy wanted out he was done he was like get me the fuck out of it and he just went top to bottom shut out but they can't feel what your body feels so
Starting point is 00:50:08 like the fact that they're telling you when to push is mad isn't it and your body as your body's contracting so you have contractions but suddenly once you're fully dilated is then when your body tells you to push yeah and i don't want to be that arsehole that says your body will tell you when it's ready it truly does but you have this contraction which is obviously your cervix dilating and the baby moving down and further down and then when you're ready to push the baby your body will tell you and you do like this because your body is like bearing down yeah because you're down there now and you need to push and you just got this overwhelming pushing sensation but the the pushing comes and goes so
Starting point is 00:50:46 like the contraction in waves and then you let it go and the pain stops and the contraction comes and you push so your body is naturally doing it whereas mine didn't really was just i was like and it just wasn't stopping i was like oh it's going on she was like no don't be so yeah because you knew what it was supposed to feel like third baby and I had I'd gone too far for gas in there I'm kind of intrigued
Starting point is 00:51:08 to like know what it's like I'm gonna have to do it again third baby oh god I've said it before and I'll say it again V-back
Starting point is 00:51:15 yeah people that have pushed a baby out of their vagina though god respect I still can't believe I've pushed three out I can't and it still looks normal
Starting point is 00:51:22 well give or take a few things give or take a few hemorrhoids in my asshole all right ready for the last one yes it says hi safina and emma i was listening to the episode with the newly pregnant lady who was wetting herself every time she had morning sickness and i wanted to write in with my own secret last year i was fortunate enough to go to new york with some of my girlfriends, we were staying in the Hamptons. I know, right?
Starting point is 00:51:46 How fancy pants am I? She actually says that. Does she? Yeah, that's really fancy pants. The last thing we did before heading back to our accommodation was take a boat tour, which took us past the Statue of Liberty. This is where it gets dicey. Oh.
Starting point is 00:51:57 It was a joyous trip. The wind was whipping through my hair. I was super happy. Then I started to feel weird and realized that I had inhaled a bug. I started to cough and splutter and eventually I threw up in my own mouth. I swallowed it down as I didn't want to vomit on myself. I crashed towards the bathroom and I barely closed the door before vomiting in the toilet. But there was a special twist. My pelvic floor gave way and I pissed myself on the floor. I had to take my shorts and knickers off and try
Starting point is 00:52:25 God all whilst going past the Statue of Liberty. What a trip. I had to try and dry my shorts and knickers off and dry the piss stains on a boat in the middle of the Hudson in front of the Statue of Liberty. I'm sure Lady Liberty must have the same issues. Much love Sarah in Southampton. My girl from my hometown. That's how the girls in Southampton do it. You've got to do it in style. Honestly, do it in style. That does sound like the kind of thing that would happen to you. Yeah, it does.
Starting point is 00:52:53 Slash girls from Southampton. Yeah, you're wild. You're a different breed. Oh my goodness. Sarah. Sarah, I hope you can look back at this and laugh now. You laugh now, but... We laugh with you
Starting point is 00:53:05 At the time You went Nicholas In front of Lady Liberty Yeah With your And your shorts as well Would have been okay If it was a dress maybe
Starting point is 00:53:11 Yeah I wonder what she did But she inhaled a fly And then she had to put Her damp pants back on The smell of dry clothes And piss Oh It's not the one
Starting point is 00:53:19 Bless her heart Oh well thank you for that Thank you for sharing I literally laughed At that had no involvement With any children either No Just send it You don't even have to have children to listen to this podcast oh it's free for everybody wild i want to do a girl's trip to the hamptons can we do that
Starting point is 00:53:34 secret mom club life aim high who are we gonna take you and me yeah not the babies you can't leave sadie. She needs your boob. She can come. Fine. She can come. You can come. Fine. Thank you for sharing your secrets this week. Everyone is welcome in the Secret Mum Club.
Starting point is 00:53:53 If you'd like to share your secrets with us, you can. The email is hello at secretmumpod.com or with Secret Mum Pod on TikTok and Instagram. Have you had a double whammy? I thought I was going to say double whammy. You're funny. What? Shake your whammy? I thought I was going to say double whammy. You're funny. What? Shake your whammy, funny, funky song. Have you had a double whammy in front of the Statue of Liberty?
Starting point is 00:54:12 Or have you experienced a fart-induced labour? Let us know. There really is nothing too outrageous. And keep an eye out for our Thursday episode and our next Sunday Soak. And we'll see you next time on the Secret Mum Club. ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend.
Starting point is 00:54:48 Céline Dion. My dream? To be an international star. Could it happen again? Could Céline Dion happen again? I'm Thomas Leblanc, and Céline Understood is a four-part series from CBC Podcasts and CBC News, where I piece together the surprising circumstances
Starting point is 00:55:07 that helped manufacture Celine Dion, the pop icon. Celine Understood. Available wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts. Everywhere. Acast.com.

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