Secret Mum Club with Sophiena - The House Is Too Quiet!

Episode Date: July 16, 2026

A bedtime tradition has gone completely out of hand as one listener shares her very long nighttime routine! After chatting about the magic of childhood play, Sophiena and Emma reflect on just how fast children grow up, and how quickly a noisy house can become a quiet one. Plus, the ladies celebrate a beautiful pregnancy update from a listener, and there's another brilliant masterpiece in the Secret Mum Club Gallery.Emma Spring Bank Holiday Sale is live! Get up to 25% off plus extra 5% using the code SECRETSLEEP at Emma Sleep.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Secret Mum Club starts in just a moment. But first, I've got a recommendation for your next listen, Made by Mommas. Zoe Hardman and Georgia Dayton are joined by couples therapist and relationship coach Karen Doherty. Because sometimes we all need a little help navigating the ups, downs and the, are we actually okay moments of a relationship. Search for Made by Mommas now and get the episode lined up to play next. Hello, this is The Secret Mum Club. I'm Saphina.

And I'm Emma. And welcome to your Thursdays. episode where we get to squeeze in all the extra bits and bobs from the week. We'll squeeze all of your bits, honey. All of your comments, questions, thoughts, all of your thoughts, questions, what? Say it in any order you want. I think mix it up. All of your comments, thoughts, questions and fun stories. Keep you going through the weekend. Show it your bonies. It's time for another Correspondence Corbyn...

Nice. I did a thing to stop and I went, I hit my mouth too. No, I hit my mouth. Joseph does conduct in like fingers. Yeah, I'm happy he's going to be like some, you know, be musical.

But it might be musical. Well, Stefan's family of the Von Tramps, aren't they? He's got it in his blood. He's running for his family. I already think they can both sing in tune but maybe I just think that because I'm their mum. You're biased. Yeah.

Has anybody else had them sing? Yeah, actually. And Stefan's sister, who is the music. music teacher was like, they're in tune. Oh, thank God it's not Jojo in tune and Stefan's out. That would be awkward. Sorry, Dad, you're not doing bits for this song. Could you get out?

Yeah, he'll be like, you're off key. That's what Stefan says to me. You're off key. Oh, God. Shut up. So, do you want to take it away with number one? Yes, okay, honey. This one is from Kerry in Leicestershire.

Oh, hello, Kerry. She says, hi, hi, Sophie and Emma. I've followed the podcast since day one and I haven't missed a single episode. Oh, Kerry, God bless you. I've related to so many of the topics you've discussed, but I've never felt so compelled to get in touch as I did after listening to The Magic of Playtime. As I listened to you reading Annie's email, I felt all kinds of emotions. I teared up, then I got butterflies in my stomach as I was transported back to my 13-year-old self, waiting for the school bell to ring so I could rush home and start the next chapter of my make-believe parenting life. I'd walk home from school as a child, but the second I stepped through my bedroom door, I became an exhausted parent to my very well-loved baby dolls.

Every day was a new adventure and I'm forever grateful I grew up before technology took over when life felt that little bit simpler Thank you for all the hours of entertainment you've given me over the years That is absolutely fucking adorable I love that she came home to be

Just step into her own that stage She's a superhero Or a fairy or a princess She's like I'm just an exhausted mother Do you know I've been at work all day I'm so tired I imagine just coming home

But I'd give anything now You know Chris might have some questions if I just shut myself in my bedroom, took Dotsy's dolls. But it's just something so magical in that. It's so sweet and innocent, isn't it? So lovely. And you want, this is what we want, isn't it?

We want them to slow down and I feel like it's near on impossible. Like I try it as much as my hardest to, it works at great now because it's beautifully sunny outside. So the moment we get home from school, dinner's in the garden, baths are in the garden. I feel the paddling pool up last night with warm water and some soap and they all just had a bath in the garden. together and it was so sweet and then you're coming in everyone shattered because they've been in

the sun and in the pool and swimming and running around water balloons and they're going straight to bed and it's just something so dreamy yeah but it's just when the winter comes around it's when it gets harder yeah yeah it is it is bleak and also growing up now like she was 13 doing this like the thought of a 13 year old girl now you know not just like my niece is 13 yeah and can you imagine her coming home and playing with which is 13th She'd she come home and play with dolls? No. What would she do?

Come home and get on her iPad. It's actually quite sad at the moment because my sister keeps getting a little bit upset, which is, you know, fair enough, her house has massively changed in the last couple of years. You know, Eden's applying for university this year for her to go to university. Tobias is in his last year of school, you know, he's going to, in year 11 now, he's got up a life of college. And she gets quite emotional and she goes quite quiet. My sister's quite a quiet reserved person, anybody, I mean, I talk for the both of us.

Talk for the whole fan. And she just said, it's so noisy. Like last night we saw her last night and she was like, it's so noisy. And I was like, oh gosh, I'm so sorry. Do you want me to? She was like, no, I don't remember the last time. Like I just had. A house was full of noise.

Noise. Because she said everyone just comes in and they go upstairs and they're on their phones doing homework or texting their friends. And there's just no noise in the house. And it made me really sad because you've got, we also have our neighbours, don't we? And they've got young children. So everybody's running in. And last night, it was me and Chris, our neighbour.

our neighbours, their children. My brother popped in to have, you know, a weekly catch up with us and the babies. And then my sister popped by. And it was just, it was loud. It was busy. Everyone was in and out. I put food out. I was feeding the troops, giving everybody drinks.

And she just said, I just don't remember the last time my house was ever this busy. That's what I tell myself now when I see like all the fucking propaganda on Instagram. I'm like, right, I need to appreciate these moments and like. I love the noise. Take them in. Because I tell you the silence is so fucking loud. I know. And that's what she's going for and it makes me so sad.

I know. And now we're preparing for Eden to potentially move away for uni. Oh God. When the first one leaves. Do you follow Murphy's sketches on Instagram? No. She does the poems. I can't.

I should fucking, she's great, but I should unfollow her because every post makes me cry. And she read, I saw one last night. She was reading out one of our own poems about a child leaving sixth form. But it applies for like a child leaving nursery or anything really or going to university. And I was like, bloody. My child's only just about to start reception and I'm crying about a poem about a child leaving six. She'll go to university, yeah. It's too much, isn't it?

It's too much. They're just, they're growing up too fast. But we hear you and we see you and we don't want anyone to feel alone. And I just hope it's, I hope someone finds comfort in it that there is other people out there going through. Going through other things, you know, because it's hard, isn't it? I feel like my sister feels like she's the only one going through it. Yeah. And everybody's house dynamic is also so different.

Yeah. Like they'll all sit together and have dinner. dinner together, but then they go all back upstairs. That's my main thing I want to do is just like make sure we all have dinner together. But I hope like me and Stefan are like maybe by the time our kids get older, there'll be a bit of a backlash against technology and they won't be. So ingrained. They won't be so ingrained in their lives, like tablets and phones and stuff.

But I don't know. We can cross everything, can't wait. But we're sending you all of our love. That is beautiful, Kerry. So thank you. So sweet. Thank you. So sweet. Thank you so much.

Okay. Ready for another? Next one. Yes. Says, hi ladies. A little while ago I wrote in asking for advice after my early miscarriage and wondering if I was overreacting by being so heartbroken. Well, I'm so, so happy to tell you that I'm now 13 weeks pregnant.

We had our first scan and everything is perfect. The second I saw our little baby wriggling around on the screen, I burst into tears. I honestly can't wait to become a mummy and put all of your advice into practice. Thank you so much for all your support and making me realise I wasn't overreacting before. All the love, Anonymous. Oh my gosh. Do you remember this one when she wrote in? I do, yeah.

And she'd written in and she was like, I don't know why I feel so devastated. And we said that it doesn't matter at whatever stage you're at. It is the most gut-wrenching feeling and so valid. So valid for you to be absolutely shattered and heartbroken. Because that's it. The moment you get that positive pregnancy test, you've already planned the nursery. Oh, your mind goes into overdrive.

You've got full wardrobe, planned nursery, bottles, your day trips. You're already thinking about colleges and universities. I jumped 1,000 feet ahead of me when the moment you see that positive pregnancy test and it's so valid. But this is just absolutely beautiful. Because it was about, just looking back at her old message, it was about a year ago since they'd been trying for the baby that they sadly lost. So how full circle to come to this year and know that you're...

And how wonderful that she's come back to share it with us. I know. That is really, really lovely. Oh, congratulations. Thank you. Oh, massive congratulations to you both. Wishing you the most beautiful pregnancy. And please let us know if we're...

If we're going to find out the gender of our baby. Yes. Because it's a family baby here. Yeah. Aunties on board. We're ready to rock the shit. Or just keep us updated on your pregnancy. Yes.

And then obviously baby safe arrival into the world. Oh gosh. It's so exciting. Enjoy every second. Yeah. Take fuck loads of photos. Yeah. Take all the bump photos.

You can't have too many bump photos. How many of my friends have said to me, oh, I didn't take any bump picks this time around. I didn't take that many with renners. I was in the mirror every day. But I was quite poorly. But Emma even got a cast of her bump. Yeah. And she's had it miniature size and it's on her mantle piece.

Honestly, I would recommend studio bust. Amazing. But yeah, congratulations. So excited. I hope you've been feeling okay. Yes, hope you're doing okay. But you are well into it now, 13 weeks. I hope pregnancy is treating you.

Great. Oh, congratulations. Oh, keep in touch. Thank you so much. Thank you. Right, should we have a last one? Yeah. This is a, we haven't had one of these for a while.

It's a secret mum club gallery submission. This is Haylon. lovely ladies, Amanda here again. Hello Amanda! Batman, not Batman's mom. Rackets, Tobias. Okay. She says Lorelei, who seven, was feeling a little left out, so I wanted to send in her Axelotel painting from last week. Tobias and Lorelei.

Yeah. What absolutely Gorgina names. Axelotl, do you know what that is? Yes, it's one of Evely's favourite, my youngest niece. Right. She loves a Capibara and an axolotle. It's an animal? Yes.

Because I hadn't heard that word ever, and I feel like I've got frequent see illusion because now I heard it once and I keep hearing it, it keeps popping up everywhere. It's like when you go to change your car and you look for a new car and you find when you really love, then you don't see it anywhere when you go to buy it and then once you bought it and put to Posda. It's one actually on your drive when you get out. It's not yours. It's the neighbours. Yeah. Amanda says she'd had a rough dental appointment and ended up spending the day at home so painting became our little recovery activity. I hope you love it as much as I do. Right, do

the big reveal. Do you want to do the big reveal? Do you want me to do the reveal? Yeah. I don't know what an Axelot was supposed to look like. Do you? Yeah, they're pink and purple and they've got like a long head with a wiggly body and they've got little spikes down it. Do you want to Google it? Search an axolottle so you know when you're looking at Laurelis. Hey Siri, show me a picture of an axelottle. Here are some images of axelotl from the web. Oh.

What's there about that? That's quite cute. Is it? It's a fish, is it? I don't think it's a dolphin. It's underwater. Yeah, it lives in the water, lives in the ocean. Looks gross. Let's see it, Lorelei. Oh, well, Lorelei, I will love your picture. Emma clearly, on the other hand, is not going to.

Are you ready? In three, two, one. Oh, it does look like... Hers looks way cute, sir. Oh, that is actually... He's eating an ice cream. It's got a lolly! It's got a lollipop!

I wonder what that was. It's a little lollipop. It did look a bit vagina-esque, but no, you're right. It's a lollipop. It is because this is, unless that's a bum hop. Well, no, that's not a long bum hole. That's a lollipop because that's the lines in the lollipop. Yes, yeah, you're right.

And maybe it's a chameleon axolotelot that's colour shifted to the colour of their lollipop. That is absolutely a ten out of chance. She's how old? Seven. Wow. Lorelae, that is absolutely gorge. Thank you so much. Thank you so much.

We'll have to put next to Batman, not Batman. by Tobias. Oh my gosh, that is cutesy Batoos. Yeah, you've made it look a lot cuter than it is in real life. Well done, Lorelai. If you looked at a cartoon axolottle or a teddy bear axolotel, they're really, really cute. Look at a cartoon axolotel. Hey, Siri, show me a picture of a cartoon axelotel.

Oh, yeah, they've made it like a Pokemon. Show me? Yeah, that's cute. I wouldn't say you're looking at the right ones. Maybe it's Siri really doing bits for you. Axolottle teddy. Yeah, I'd say marketeers have done a really good job with the axolottle because they've made it look really cute and appealing and in real life it looks disgusting.

Right. Lorelei, I think the axolottle has got some good PR. It's great PR. Great PR people. Bless its heart. It is beautiful. Thank you. Love it.

Thank you, Amanda as well for allowing us to have your baby's beautiful artwork too. Yeah, both of them would have been on my kitchen wall. I'm not going to lie. It's dreaming. A replica. Maybe. So thank you for your messages this week. If you have any comments, thoughts or funny stories, why not get in touch?

You can email us hello at secret mumpod.com or we're Secret Mumpod on TikTok and Instagram. And next is time for one of your secrets in the Secret Mum Club. Back, we love a secret on the Secret Mum Club. And you're all so good at sharing. So Emma, what have you got for us today on night? Okay, this comes from Amy. Hello, Amy. It says, hi, Sophie and Emma.

I think I've made a huge parenting mistake. Hold up. Back up. There is no parenting mistake. That can't be fixed. That's not technically true. It is. Everything can be fixed. With therapy.

Therapy and glue. When my daughter was little, I made up a silly bedtime routine where we kissed her toys good night. It was cute when there were three teddy's. She now has 47. Every night I spend nearly 20 minutes kissing jelly cat after jelly cat

because if I miss one, she somehow knows. Last week I forgot the octopus and she burst into tears because he'll think we don't love him anymore. I don't know how to end this tradition without traumatising an entire stuffed animal family. Help, love Amy. I was waiting for Amy to say she's 47 years old.

I wish we're still doing it. That's what I thought. It's been going on for 40 years. Also, this was me with my Teddies. Oh, did you have to? Kiss them all. Yes. I don't really know how it stopped to be on.

honest. But I used to kiss them. My mum didn't come in and kiss my Teddies. I used to just kiss them all on my own. Yeah, that's nice. And then I used to get really angry at myself and I was in a, I used to be in a cabin bed so I'd have to climb out of the cabin bed and get into like get back down, kiss all the bears and go back up. And if you missed one and you'd be up and down. Then I'd be like, stop moving in that bloody bed. Sorry, I'm just kissing my teddy's mum. At least I'm not making you fucking do it as well. You downstairs watching EastEnders. Fucking ill. She's on the old Emmerdale train downstairs to Prosecos D.

Shut! But no, ice kiss on all my bears. I feel like when it does stop, you will be sad. Yeah, but again, it's one of those things that at the moment, I bet she's like, this is so bloody annoying. I just want to go downstairs and I've got to be in here for 20 minutes. Why don't we make it a game and say, should we do something else?

Because we don't ever want to make anybody upset. We want to make sure that everyone is all inclusive. But I think whatever you start, it's dangerous. You could do something by like writing a letter to one teddy a night. I say when when she's, asleep, you give all the teddy's a little kiss. Yeah, anything. You could write a little note to one teddy so that no one ever feels like they've missed out

on the kiss or had enough time. You could change your tradition. It's hard once they get their little thing there, isn't it? We went for a phase of letting Joseph rearrange his teddies on his bed before bed. But again, he's got shitloads. So that took a decade forever. And he'd like to do, when he was in a cot bed at the old house, he'd put them all up around by his head and his pillow.

I'd go great, ready to go to bed and he'd go, I want to change ends and then you'd have to change and put them all down the foot end Oh gosh And then once they're at the foot end, he'd maybe go, I want to put my head down that end now So I'd flip the quilt and the pillow And then he'd go, no, I want to go

I want it back to how I had it the first time 45 minutes ago. Yeah, I'm like, yeah, we've been in here for an hour Now. I'm not doing this. But like once you break the tradition, all hell's going to break those. So I'd say sorry, Amy, but you're fucked.

No, Amy, you're doing absolutely splendid 47 jellycats Sell them No, don't sell them Yeah maybe ask her If she wants to sell them See if she can make herself some cash Yeah

To buy more jelly cats No listen that's fucking horrible Don't do that Amy No don't bless her up But seriously what lucky We could pick one One maybe one can We pick one bear that we kiss

And we sleep with And then they each get a night Sleepover with you Yeah Yeah I got no ideas I got no ideas But if anybody does have any tips

Let us know We'll pass them on to our girl. Oh, your teddy's really take on a life of their own when you're little, though, don't they? I've still gotten all of my teddy's in laughed. I really believed that mine did, like, come to life after I left the room. 100% it was in the toy story. I think that's why I love Toy Story so much. I was 100%.

I used to be scared shitless of my luminous green Furby, and I used to put him in the pantry, not the pantry, in the airing cupboard on the landing, because I just think that fuck is going to come alive at night and be like, ah, love! With his blinky eyes. They did, didn't they? Yeah. But I had to lock him in the car.

cupboard because I used to think, fuck that if he's coming alive. I can't do it. Yeah, no. Can't do it. God. But that's us this week. Please email us. It's hello at secret mumpod.com or with Secret MumPod on TikTok and Instagram. And we'll be back first thing on Tuesday. We're up more of your messages on our next Thursday episodes. And we'll see you next time, honies, on the Secret Mum Club.