Seeking Derangements - SD 159 - Undercover Billionaire 1: Slop Town

Episode Date: September 23, 2022

On tonight's episode we start our newest review series! This is a show you definitely haven't heard of but its going to be your new obsession. It's called Undercover Billionaire and it's deranged. Joining us in our exploration of the American Entrepreneurial Spirit is businesswoman extrordinaire and hate crime victim Jake Sillen (Rash, Heaven, Club Cringe) Join us as we identify key players in the town!  Follow jake on IG! @hoe_slut_hoe

The The The The The The The The

The The The The The The Thank you. Is the American dream still alive? welcome back everyone we are starting a new uh review series since we finished the demi episodes um we're back with a show called undercover billionaire we're going to be doing episodic reviews of it it's possibly even dumber than the Demi show. It's definitely more evil than the Demi show.

It is exactly what it sounds like. To join us for the first installment, we have Bushwick Business Maven, a key player and a victim of domestic terrorism, Jake Sillin. Hello, Mama. Happy to be here. Happy to be here. Happy to be alive. Tess is here as well. Hello, Mama. Happy to be here. Happy to be alive. Tess is here as well. There she is.

The first time I saw this show, I was just scrolling through the Discovery Plus app because it literally is the best streaming platform out there because it's just like shows called like Meth Truckers. And I saw Undercover Billion billionaire and i was like i need to watch this show of course it's like it's a piece of like hustler propaganda or whatever i'm way more interested in the characters

themselves than any kind of critique of the show because the critique is self-evident like it's just it's not really that interesting well we should explain what happens the show is about these billionaires and what they do is they go to a struggling opioid crisis ridden town in like middle america absolute shit town yeah with yeah with a. Garbage small cities. Yeah. Seventh tier cities, literally. And they get a truck, $100, and a phone with no contacts. And that's key. They have no contacts.

No contacts. They have to have assumed identities. New names. A little bit of a new look. A little bit of a new look, yes. They have to do. they have to wear a groucho barks they have to wear overalls yeah but yeah they get a hundred dollars a truck an old truck an old truck it's a very old old truck it's like a 2012 uh chevy silverado yeah and they are tasked with building from scratch a business that will be valued at a million dollars within 90 days given this these bare bone materials that's the show that's the show there's three billionaires um we'll go through

we should mention that this is season two. It is season two. Yeah. So in season one, this billionaire, Glenn, Glenn Shurns. The first trans-mass billionaire. He's very trans-mass. And he failed. I think we can say that.

We can give that spoiler. He started a barbecue restaurant. And in the first season, he ended and he didn't hit that million dollar goal. But he's still working at that barbecue restaurant and in the first season he ended and he didn't hit that million dollar goal but he's still working at that barbecue restaurant if you think the first season is not that good the second season is amazing glenn stearns is pretty uncharismatic he's kind of wimpy um unlike he is like a philanthropist like his whole sort of idea it's about like restoring the town it's sort of they've done episodes where they go back and check in on him and he's you know like really involved in like the fabric of the community of the town and that's kind of like what he was in it for and so now they turn the camera exactly yeah yeah they turn the purpose up. We get some actual sociopathic billionaires

with real charisma and absolute bloodthirst. They go into these towns. They shake everyone down. They lie. They cheat. They scam. They truly do use every evil resource at their power to exploit these local family businesses.

And they're also not billionaires. Elaine, her net worth is $200 million. She's not even a fifth of a billionaire. So let's get into that because I love each of these characters. The casting for these three is genius because it really does kind of cover a full cultural spectrum. I think we can start with our favorite, just a quick primer on each of them,

and then we'll get into the actual hijinks they pull in these shit towns. Elaine, I would say, is favorite across the board. Yeah. Episode one. Hands down. So her name is Elaine Kaladi. She is a real estate developer.

She lives in California. Her intro is so amazing she's just like she's like it's not it's not easy to be a woman in construction there's no crying in construction i make other people cry i'm elaine collati and i'm 100 a badass i'm a builder i'm a developer i'm a designer and i'm a visionary. Casinos, hospitals, luxury homes, I've handled over a billion dollars worth of real estate. If it can be built, I can figure out a way to do it. No one's made me cry, but I make everyone cry. She calls herself skinny.

She's like listing all of the problems she has to face on a daily basis, and she's like, I'm so skinny. But I have a long list, really, actually, of things I'm going skinny. She's like listing all of the problems she has to face on a daily basis. And she's like, I'm so skinny. But I have a long list really, actually, of things I'm going to miss. I love to get my nails done. I like to feel perfect all the time. I always keep more than one housekeeper. And I don't have a pool man. I have a pool team.

So I'm going to take care of the horses. Swans. Swans are not easy to take care of. I'm just skinny. I have plenty of other problems. It's just that's not one of them. They passed an anti-party ordinance in my name, which really sucks. My temper is my biggest weakness. They have to know that I'm not going to put up with any nonsense. Seek and destroy.

My feet are on the ground all the time. They are solidly on the ground all the time. She's amazing. She's kind of like, she's got some like good work done she's like california like badass entrepreneurial female she's a little bit older she's amazing um and she's very gwyneth gwyneth build sort of yeah kind of like mask except her skin is worse yeah um the second one probably the craziest of them all, is Grant Cardone. We also love Grant. Grant is a math pad. Like literal psycho from Miami.

He is a drug addict. Does he live in Miami? Yeah. I'm Grant Cardone, and I make money. I make a lot of money. I own 17 companies and almost $2 billion in real estate. I'm the best-selling author of eight business books, the founder of the 10X movement, and I sell out massive events all over the world. Love you guys.

The show finds him in Las Vegas. He's kind of he's like an mlm guy he does like he's at the top of the mlm game like he is the guy you buy the ticket to go to like the hotel conference for yeah he's got the workshops and the books and like it cut to him doing like um uh like you know nuremberg rally style um session of like screaming at like literally like fire going off people screaming and he's like on stage going like who are trying to like trying to like find out how to pay their employees less it's so unclear what he actually does i don't know what the business is in it's called yeah it's called 10x um and if anyone remembers the viral mini girl boss clip that went around maybe six or seven months ago, it's a little girl on stage, and she's talking about how she can't wait to be an adult because she wants to work. I can't wait to grow up.

I can't wait to work. That was on his stage. That's his daughter he's pouring out his kids at his business conferences to do like aspirational business um like coaching but he um is just like incredibly masculine he's very cum-brained as you said hessa yeah he's cum-brained and he's just like yeah he's just a hardcore like like old school salesman, you know? The third one who, personally, I hate her. We hate her.

We hate her. We hate her so much. Also not a millionaire or billionaire. She's probably the poorest of all of them. Yeah. Grant is actually a billionaire, but the other two are not billionaires I feel like he has like Just over a billion

I feel like Grant is living in a billion dollar house of cards He says things like You don't want to have a savings You don't want to have any retirement That's his first investment advice Don't save money Everything you think you know About achieving the American dream is wrong. The middle class concepts, saving money, retirement,

everything you know about money today has you trapped. Okay, man. He's like, you got to flip it, man. You got to flip it, man. You're getting paid. You got to flip that money. It's like he has the cadence and the gruff voice of someone who's at a bus stop who's like, I've been at this bus stop for four years and I go to that 7-Eleven all the time.

I love that 7-Eleven. It's just like that kind of just really mask homeless guy. It's about the hustle. It's about the grind. Yeah. It's like crackhead rambling. Yeah. The third one, Monique, the loser, the one we all hate.

Monique Ledet, she made her money from being Timbaland's wife. That's why she's... Timbaland's ex-wife. Ex-wife. And her thing, she runs

something called Rain Ventures, which is a tech startup focused on women and minorities. But her sort of claim to fame is that she started a record group that... Yes. I can't even remember the people that she sent. It was like One Republic. One Republic. Keith Urban, One Republic.

Yeah. I'm Monique Eidlett. I'm best known as the co-founder and CEO of Mosley Music Group, which I started with my ex-husband Timbaland. We were a full-service label that had a joint venture with Interscope Records with Jimmy Iovie, home to Nelly Furtado, OneRepublic, Keith Urban, Chris Cornell. She started a grocery store records label. Yeah, it's like the best value store records like label yeah it's like it's like the best value like dollar store she links up uh fail bands with failed record companies to make failed music um she says she's taking on this challenge for women of color to show them that they can become i guess billionaires with and i

was excited for her in the first the first time i watched this first episode i was kind of excited for her because i was like she's coming out of la she has the music background is different and coming from like timbaland i thought she could be good but that's quickly halfway through the episode you realize she's just awful yeah she's awful and also i'm realizing maybe it's her fault that like timbaland and one republic made that song together absolutely yeah that's probably why they got divorced because he was like you I'm realizing maybe it's her fault that like Timbaland and One Republic made that song together. Absolutely. Yeah. That's probably why they got divorced. Because he was like, you made me make the worst song ever.

I don't love you anymore. And they do this. They say goodbye to all of their families. And Monique is at like Timbaland's house. I think like handing off the kids because she's like, Mommy is going to a post-industrial shit town to do lifestyle business. Charity work. Charity work.

And Timbaland's like, man, I would never do that shit. He literally just flat out is like, I would never do that. Yeah, she's doing charity work, which is people giving her charity. Literally. She's just very infographic she speaks in infographics it's truly just like she's been brain poisoned and this entire um season takes place during the very beginning of covid like yeah so actually different so different phases so grant actually later in the series we'll see that like he kind of has to deal with shelter in place uh

guidelines and but the other two they're post-covid so they're both like kind of maybe end of 2020 well they all go to different states and i feel like they have different like state laws too for how things shut down and stuff but covid is like another main character in this series it's very funny grant gets COVID at one point and has complete... Grant is always having a meltdown in a parking lot. This time he also has like a fever. Oh my God. Okay, which one should we start with?

I think we start with Grant. He's like the center. He's kind of the center of the character. Grant really holds it down. The first thing, when he says goodbye to his family, he's like, I'm going to bring you he really holds it down it the first thing when he says goodbye to his family he's like i'm gonna bring you out there with me the first chance i get and then like you see like a little side quest like a side quest acquired like marker come up the whole the whole series is very video game because as his characters go throughout their

quest to start um a million dollar business within 90 days there's like a ui money they have and like every time they spend something they're like meter like it like turns red and like they're like decreases you know it's very and then later and then it becomes their net worth so it starts to become what have they acquired and what are they who are they working with it's an amazing premise i want i personally want to do this so bad yeah it'd be so fun to do this it'd be amazing dropped off somewhere so grant um takes off in a plane after a very tearful goodbye to his family has two young daughters and a like like bitmoji ass wife it literally looks like he just like bought her yeah um but they all start crying and he's like

i'm gonna get you guys out there first chance i get i need my family i need my family that's just one thing i really need which is like kind of against the rules as someone who's living a different life as like a fake yeah he's barely supposed to be in contact with them much less like bringing them into his new life like pulling them them out of school so that they can join him to business meetings where he's not supposed to have kids. And so each of these characters, they establish their bootstrap lifestyle or life path. Grant comes from a broken home home his like i guess his dad was never there and he um apparently he got his skull bashed in with a pistol when he was when he was doing drugs like i was with druggies i was with drug dealers i got into some nasty stuff

i was selling cars he's just like he's very hunter biden um but that's kind of his sympathetic upbringing, is that he had a lot of problems with drugs. Clearly, the way he talks is still like coke head. Yeah. So his life story is already, he's like, he's made a business out of selling the American dream. And so like this show is just perfect for him because it's just another chance to like prove that basically you could, if you just

have the right business principles you can make anything happen yeah anywhere in the country yeah and so he he gets on a private jet of his own i believe and he is sent to uh pueblo colorado but my favorite part of him taking off in the jet the jet takes off he's like really sad because he can't see his family he's not he doesn't have his girls with an eyesight and as the jet is taking off he says start her up boys i guess he's like screaming that at the pilot it's like dude like like he's on a dinghy it's like when you let a toddler sit in the front seat of a parked car and like move the steering wheel around you're like you're such a good driver it's like you can't just tell your pilot take it lift it up he lands in pueblo colorado which when i lived in denver pueblo is like an hour or so south of

um pueblo and it was the murder capital of the United States at this time. There's a poop processing plant in Pueblo. The entire town smells like shit. The poop factory? There's a poop factory. Like a closed poop factory

probably. Everyone lost their jobs in a poop factory. An abandoned poop factory. That's the vibe that Pueblo gets. And he lands and he's immediately just like, I don't even know where to start, man. He starts kind of freaking out. He acts like he's actively being hunted.

He's like, I just got to stay on the road. I just got to go see what's going on. So he gets in his truck and he starts driving into the center of town. And he says what I think is my favorite line from him the whole show which is you have to when you get to town you have to quickly identify key players i need to quickly find key players in this town and get myself a payday which i since we watched this show over a year ago i have not stopped thinking about that line that he gets into town and his eyes are looking for like these like UI overlay of

like glowing key players as opposed to normal people. He's looking for quest giving NPCs. He just, he like sees a woman coming out of a wall with like a cookie. Not a key player. Not a key player. Loser.

I can't get anything from that bitch. He's looking for the manager of the Walmart. Not a game plan. Loser. Loser. I can't get anything from that bitch. He's looking for the manager of the Walmart instead. He's like glowing in his mind. I love Brett because he really is the only one that like, because he's so like frenetic and like just like high T business mindset. He's the only one that really does do like hustle patron or stuff like, well, like he,

he, he like, um, Monique, it does like mutual aid and Elaine, it kind of like charms her way into every scenario. She fucks her way in. She fucks her way in.

We'll get to Elaine, we'll get to Elaine being a little co-cat, but Grant is just like, he's like, you gotta identify key players. You never take no for an answer. The first key player that he finds. The first key player. When I'm drunk at a gay bar,

I wanna hook up with someone, I gotta identify the key players. So his first key player is the manager of an RV sales yard. He's not wrong. I mean, again, this is an abandoned poop factory town. No, he tore beyond. He tore beyond.

And so he's like on his phone in his like giant suburban SUV, but like a shitty one. And he's like, he's like, I phone in his like giant suburban SUV, but like a shitty one. And he's like, he's like, I'm scrolling. I'm looking for RV. They're all the RV places close at five. I don't know how I'm going to find one.

I got to find one quick. And he calls an RV place. And he tells him I'm going to buy an RV. He like lies to them. Stay open for me. I'm going to buy an RV. He lies his way to the bottom at the end this episode is him lying his way to the very bottom and so he has him to stay in he goes into this rv place and like

immediately like one foot into this sales place he's like hello he's like just starts announcing himself to an empty room well so this is also where we should bring in the cameras this whole this whole thing is mediated by like a documentary crew so anywhere he walks in he has the added like bonus of like six cameras following him and a producer so anyone kind of gives him a first meeting just because this is like a poop town yeah and he he um they all again like they have assumed identities his name is lewis curtis which is such a fake name male porn star name you know he's had he's done gay porn oh he likes he looks it he looks it definitely done it in his like smoking days. Probably doesn't remember.

But he's been there. It's like a Pornhub video called White Thug Comes at Night. But he goes in. He meets the owner of this RV shop. He immediately shakes him down. And he has an assumed identity. And they all also have to lie about why the camera crews are there. He says that the camera crew is there because they're doing a documentary about entrepreneurs in Pueblo.

And the guy who he's talking to, what's that guy's name again? The RV guy? Ryan. He talks to Ryan. He tells Ryan that. And Ryan's like, oh, do you have a business in town? Like, what are you doing? he's talking what's that guy's name again the rv guy ryan ryan he talks to ryan he tells ryan that and ryan's like oh you you do you have a business in town like what are you doing he's like no i just i just got here from la and he goes like an hour ago i just got here yeah i'm just moving my family out from la so they're kind of following me around is it all right if they're here here

in pueblo yeah well welcome to pueblo yeah thank you thank you. So this is, this is an RV, right? Yeah. And he's like, so I'm not looking for a handout. So what can I do if I'm staying in this, uh, if I'm staying in this RV,

he makes asks in like the best way where he, like, he really undercuts it at the beginning. And then he asks for, he's already made the ask. He's already made the ask. He's already made the ask. It's like, could I, I'm like, I really need a dollar. Could you give me 20?

It's like that. Yeah. And he does that with RVs. He does it with cars, but he loves name dropping Los Angeles. Loves being like, I just got here from LA. I need to start a business. Which is actually smart. Like someone coming into Pueblo and just name dropping LA does work.

Because like, oh, City Slicker's here. Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's preying on their insecurities. Oh, my favorite thing he says before he pulls up to the RV place is, oh, it looks like a family business. The UI, like a thing like comes up like family business business type colon

easy to make deals with wife pressure point wins over the affection of Ryan this like just normal like fat like just normal, like fat, like just, you know, like corn fed American average poop town resident.

Yeah. And he literally tells him, like, this guy, Ryan is walking Grant back to the office to be like, let's sit down and talk about it, brother. And he's like,

if you're in Pueblo, you gotta try a slopper. And by the way, if you're in Pueblo, you've got to try a slopper. And by the way, if you're going to live in Pueblo, you're going to have to try a slopper. Stop it. Stop talking to me. I'm going to Google that right now. Pueblo, Colorado, slopper. And Grant is just like, yeah, okay.

It looks exactly like you think. It's just like a sloppy jello, I'm sure. It's a cheeseburger or hamburger covered in red chili or green chili. And then they're served with a huge portion of coleslaw. That sounds absolutely vile. You gotta try a slopper at Poopies.

You gotta go down to Poopies. Go down to Poopies. Get a slug, get a slug, get a slug, get a slug, get a slug, get a slug. Go down to movies. Go down to movies. Head down to movies. Slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, slug, Okay, hold on a second. Jake, that happens all the time. It sounded so cool. It's so annoying. Wait, I need to trim this down a little bit.

You said the word slop really 10 times. I'm keeping it in. I'm keeping it in. okay i'm back on i'm back on um jake I'm sorry, my mic cut out again. You're probably getting an amazing Slopper music beat down right now. But Jake found in the meantime, while I was reconnecting, that the best Slopper in Pueblo has avocado added to it.

I put a picture of a Slopper in the chat. We'll make that the episode. A $21 Sllobber. I'm looking up slobber burger NYC and we're going to go get one. Well, we have to bring the slobber. We have to do we have to do a slobber pop-up. We got to identify

the key players in New York City. Literally on Ben's street, there's a place. Are you serious? Oh, God god this picture is it looks like vomit okay so it seems like on one side of town they put oyster crackers on top of the slapper

there's probably like regional beef micro regional beef the other side uses raw white onion y'all put I know y'all put oyster crackers There's probably like regional beef, micro regional beef. The other side uses raw white onion. I know y'all put oyster crackers on your sloppers. This is so gross. Oh, God, disgusting. So Grant shakes down this RV owner for shelter for the night.

And he basically, I forget, he just does his grant style ask where he's like look i'm not looking for a handout i don't got a place to sleep but if you give me an rv i'll only be there for four days yeah yeah and then nothing in return he didn't offer to work or anything well he was like i'll do security or he like, you'll get free security because I'll be there. And the guy was like, I guess. It kind of seems like we would be the security to take care of you. To keep you out. And then afterwards, Ryan tells Grant, oh, by the way, go check out Poopers. Go down to down to poopies i got you a hundred dollar gift card

for so you can get a meal tonight yeah he says he says go to the bar talk to candy i got a hundred go talk to candy and get a sloper and he has a $100 tab so he doesn't go so that night he goes and if you notice so he goes he orders two dishes and he gets one to go and then he heads out and he eats his meal he's got a meal for tomorrow

he's excited he's above you know he hasn't lost a dollar he's actually made some money he's made some money they show how much money his money has gone down and he of his bar tab and he spent 11 on two items which i understand public colorado might be cheaper it's but i'm guessing he didn't tip yeah so i think that grand cardone is not a tipper no absolutely that's one of his 10x lessons. Y'all, never tip. Don't tip. Don't tip. Don't tip as a business lesson. Here's a tip.

The tip I give them, don't have a retirement fund. Don't have a 401k. Don't tip. The tip I give them is, don't have a savings account. Reinvest that into key players. He, well, while he... And also, it's, I do, it's so crazy for a guy to be like go to this restaurant and

get dinner on me and for you to go there and be like can i have two entrees yeah um so wait once um never mind um so he then um goes to meet the next day his first full day he goes to meet um this guy named matt smith another player the um rv key player told him in there like very much like a ladder of connections where he's like the rv guy he asked the art he shook the rv guy down for his like biggest connection he was like who's like the wealthiest guy you know in town and then he made a meeting with that guy so he goes to see matt smith another key player who um so he goes first to use his gym to shower for free he doesn't use all the machines he uses like the five weirdest gym machines i've ever seen

the rope climber machine the rope climbing machine the rope climbing machine crawling like a jackal on this like moving ladder thing and he's in like full sweats and he's wearing like glasses that he probably doesn't need but he just thinks they make him look smarter like me you know i know um and so then he again he does this thing like whenever he's meeting someone whenever he's meeting a key player he asserts himself with so much just like dominance that he scares them like the guy who he's meeting with named matt is not at the gym yet. He's where Matt works, conducts his multiple businesses out of this gym. He has an office there. And Matt walks in and Grant is like standing at the counter and he just goes, there's the man I've been looking for. And it's like, I don't know who you are. You're scary.

You're sweating from exercising like a jackal. And you have like a gotcha camera crew yeah i thought that he was like on cheaters or something it's like he's like so what were you doing last night at poopies with diane and matt is just like i'm not to meet with you right now. I don't know if you are. Your story about being in Pueblo for like 30 hours straight from L.A., wanting to start a business with no money is incredibly sus. So sus. So he does not meet with Grant and Grant storms out into the parking lot he has he feels like a failure

he has a meltdown he really does not face rejection first of many meltdowns he's like i can't make any deals if i got this mommy producer and a camera crew following me i can't do it the funny thing is the first time i watched this i thought that the producer just stepped in of like their own accord but they stepped in because he asked Grant about his backstory and Grant went blank. Grant had nothing prepared. He was like, where are you from? And Grant just goes... Like, just stands there. And so a producer comes in and is like, hey, so this is the show.

So what put you guys up to Pablo? How'd you guys figure this place out? What's your backstory? Good morning. Matt Smith. Pleasure to meet you. Nice to meet you, too. What's the back story? I want to know. Yeah, you should know. I really don't want cameras in here. This isn't how it rolled, dude. How do you build a business?

People beg for meetings with me, and now I have to have some mommy producer step in and problem-solve or create more problems for me because of these stupid cameras. I'm gonna go. He says he'll think about talking or taking a meeting for me because of these stupid cameras. I'm gonna go. He says he'll think about talking or taking a meeting with me later. This is humiliating. Not being able to reveal who I am is wrecking my confidence.

I've never been Lewis Curtis before. It's changing my whole pitch. killing my momentum. Yeah, and then Matt just says no, and Grant goes into the parking lot has a complete meltdown um and then he i believe he drives yeah he drives back to his um rv encampment and he eyes a um he eyes a jeep that is in the parking lot without a for sale sign and he just goes that's his ui picked on a jeep in the corner of the line a 2019 jeep he's just like i really need a win and he walks up to the jeep

he's like nice nice jeep nice jeep i've gotten nowhere on my goal to make three or four thousand dollars this week i don't know what I'm doing, where I'm at. It's a good looking Jeep. It's for sale with no phone number on it. Must be Ryan's. It's gorgeous. Love to be riding around in this bad boy. A lot better than what I'm driving.

Maybe I could turn this into cash. I'm going to cut a deal with Ryan right now for that car out there. That's my goal. This is my favorite part, maybe, of Grant's arc. So he goes into the RV place. He sits down with Ryan. And he's just like, that's a super nice Jeep out there. And pivotally here, he's holding broom so he comes he grabs a broom and

he says hey i want to help out you know i don't do anything for free i don't i don't take handouts i'm here to help he's like i was just looking for the broom is what he says when he walks in the room and grabs the broom could we sit in your office for a second i wanted to grab a broom the uh the jeep you want to sell that? Oh, yeah. Where's your office? Can we go in your office? Yeah, we can go in my office. Not a problem. I can't thank you enough for what you're doing for me, but I don't want a handout.

So I got to figure out some kind of way to pay you back. So they go back to the office, and he is still holding the broom, and he does his whole thing. He's just absolutely obsessed with saying, I'm not looking for a handout before asking for, like, a $40,000 Jeep. obsessed with saying i'm not looking for a handout before asking for like a forty thousand dollar jeep he goes i'm not looking for a handout but you know like is that jeep you selling that jeep up front and ryan's like oh ironically that's a a jeep i bought for my wife but then we got divorced

no he says um it's a jeep i bought for my wife but um it's bad in the snow oh it's bad in the snow oh he said it he said wife in a way where it seemed like she was really she didn't like the jeep maybe she didn't like it um and it was a gift for him that he can sell the jeep for ryan um but what he really wants to do is sell his shit car the production team gave him said he has two thousand dollars he has two thousand dollars and then he can have like a flashy little car to drive to business meetings and stuff and it's very clear that it's not a bad idea honestly it's not his worst idea and so basically i think it's a pretty bad idea well it works it makes sense for him it makes sense for him it makes sense for him if you're going to be the kind of person who's just like shaking people down

he got a jeep out of it and so then as he leaves the office he leaves the broom in the office thanks thanks for the jeep and he pitches it to him as like i'll sell it don't worry i'll sell it and then he just like takes it he takes it and then later in the show i noticed this he's getting out of the jeep at one point to go to a business meeting and the for sale sign is in the passenger window but it is turned around it's turned inward he has no interest in selling the public cannot see that this car is for sale yeah he's literally just stole this jeep and was like gals i can sell it for 38 000 and i'll take like he said i'll take like 10 or something no he said he'll take nothing but we see in later episodes that he's out to make a profit on this G.

Oh, he profits off of it. Yeah. He's paper clipping. Yeah, he's paper clipping hard. What's paper clipping? Jake, you want to take that? Famously, one red paper clip is the story of the Canadian guy

who started with a red paper clip and ended up with a house through trades that were of greater and greater value. He's an icon for me he's an icon we still have to do a paperclip challenge against it's based on like a like an old ancient chinese story ancient chinese secret yeah you just trade you just barter uh items all barter and higher value and apparently so you trade the paperclip for like a stapler

and then you trade the stapler for like a snow globe and you get a snow globe for like and the guy i feel like that's how it really planned out a guy didn't get a house out of this because it was like early internet uh era and it was like really like he was millennial like can you believe it and so each item this guy got accrued value but through the like meme of it, not through the actual item. It was more like, we gotta do this. People were all hooked into the narrative. He traded like a neon bar sign for like a snowmobile. Like things where it was like, ah.

Like you can't just do, that's not just Facebook marketplace. No, but in the same way that all of these billionaires, oftentimes the cameras are uh an uh an advantage to them the same way like facebook was an advantage to this paperclip guy yeah yeah but he gets the jeep and then he immediately hits the road again uh scouting for some more key players and other business family businesses to shake down he's just, how sexy is this Jeep? I feel like a millionaire. And he just drives into town and starts pointing at buildings and being like, I'm going to buy that one.

I'm going to buy that one. I'm going to buy. He says, this is a direct quote. He goes, money, money, money, bang, bang, shebang. This is dope as fuck. How sexy is this Jeep? Oh my God. I feel like a millionaire.

I'm heading into downtown to get the lay of the land. Money, money, money, money right here. I'm in a little magical town right here. They need to promote this Jeep. Oh my God. I feel like a millionaire. I'm heading into downtown to get the lay of the land. Money, money, money, money right here. I'm in a little magical town right here. They need to promote this town. I know money when I see it. Look at that beauty. Shebang, shebang. 330 Union. This is dope as ****. If I put together three or four guys that want to put up the money to fix it, we flip this thing and I'll surpass my million dollar valuation i guarantee because he's looking at like a like building from like the night like early 1900s he's like we can flip that that's a rental market right there we can flip it we can make it he's just trying to gentrify downtown poop town which no one wants and he has nothing to offer nothing to offer he has nothing to offer he and this is actually my

favorite part is what happens next where he identifies another key player yeah and all from the rv guy yeah he's like all right camera crew you're gonna have to wait outside while i close some deals and then he goes into this meeting with this key player who's like a real estate guy and he like it becomes very clear after you can hear them, but you can't see them. And it becomes very clear after a short while that he has no plan. He has nothing to offer. And it's just like literally him being like,

all right, time to go and talk to this guy. And then he comes up with like three ideas in the meeting. Yeah. He's like, sir, have you ever considered uh buying this building downtown the guy's like no that's a bad idea and then he like comes out

and is like well that went fucking terrible totally he has nothing to offer but insane ass unless you want to partner with me and we we've got enough projects at the moment. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. That's all I wanted today was just to, I know I got to meet the people here and I appreciate it. Oh my God, that was a disaster guys. Disaster. You ask the guy, his name is Ryan McWilliams. He's like, we got to turn one of these old buildings downtown into students are here.

We need students want cool places to live. And he's like, let's flip one of them. And the guy's like, oh, do you like, you want a Lisa? You want a Lisa building? He's like, no, I'm talking about buying it. And he's like, okay, who's buying it? And Grant just like, one of your friends, one of your friends, right? You got, you got connections connections you got key players and then right it's just like no and then grant's like well

what about you and i team up we buy it and the guy's just like no no grant walks out again goes back to his rv and then has a complete meltdown because he's like my kids i don't know if i'm gonna get my kids here they're gonna get half an inch taller and i won't see it and he literally starts crying and then he talks he talks about how his dad um wasn't there for his childhood i love grant he's he's the most dramatic out of all of them he's so dramatic his final scene is he takes another meeting with matt the guy who walked out earlier in the gym and before this though he shaves his head in the parking lot he leaves the rv and he's like i think this is the next day actually

he wakes up he has a clipper in his hand and he goes down into the RV parking lot. He kneels on the ground and just starts shaving his head. And he's like, I got to keep the disguise up. And he gets up on his on his feet and he, you know, like is looking at himself in his camera. He's like, damn, you're a beast. You're sexy as hell. Damn, you're sexy as fuck. You fucking freak.

You fucking weird freak. You're sexy as hell damn you're sexy as fuck you fucking freak fucking weird freak you're sexy as fuck he gets back down on the ground kneels in front of the camera and he's like you see these you see these scars he like literally goes like joker mode so there should be some cracks up here in my head between the ages of 15 and 25 i was hanging out with the wrong people, period. Drug dealers, druggies. And I made a comment to somebody, the guy didn't like it. Guy came in my house and beat the out of me. Took a.45 caliber, jammed it in my face right there,

and hit me with the butt of the gun over both eyes. Hit me behind both arms to disable me. Then he just started beating on top of my head. 73 stitches in my head and face put in the hospital for three days and you would have thought i would have quit using drugs it'd be another two years and his head is dented up there's scars and i'm like i'm like dude anyone who's making a business deal with you is going to see that your head looks like an old pumpkin. It's just so many knots and scars.

And then you have meth eyes. He has beady searching eyes. He's like, where's the next hit? He has that look in his eyes. He's like, can I get a bump? He's got that dog in him. Yes, he's got that dog in him. And he's like, I was hanging out with the wrong people.

Drug dealers, druggies. And he's like, I i got my arms disabled i got hit over the head with a pistol we've got it we can put a clip in here i clip it oh yeah that's it's okay it's so good and then he goes back out to have a meeting with matt smith again he he said he called Matt Smith, the gym guy, and he recouped his initial losses at the meeting where he was kicked out. He complained about the mommy producer. He gets into his Jeep. He goes to meet Matt Smith at what's... It's not Planet Fitness. What is it called? It's called 24 Hour Fitness or something. It's some knockoff of like a big chain.

Yeah. And he goes. Seven day fitness. Twin fitness. Something like that. Yeah. He goes, this is where he gets out of the Jeep and you can see the for sale sign is pointed inward. And he goes in and he sits down with Matt and again has like another failed attempt attempt at a complete shakedown

offering nothing but insane asks and he's like he's like how can i help you matt what do you need you're a business you're a business player you got you surely there's something you need for me and that's just like what are you doing like yeah like what what are you offering yeah and he has nothing to offer so he offered at the end he offered marketing he was like i can promote your business he's like give me a chance to get foot traffic in here because he's matt has a new mattress store and so he's like you want people in the mattress store buying mattresses yeah so matt agrees to let him try something and that he'll pay the promotion cost but he won't pay grant anything exactly yeah which i guess is like why not i would never trust grant with anything but you know i feel like this is like a real um window into how like men like straight men operate where it's just like if one it's like really really really just like aggressive you just you

have to say yes yeah it's like it's guy code it's guy code yeah um and that after agreeing to let grant do promotion for his mattress company matt is like yeah i still don't know anything about it about him i don't know who this weird guy is this I don't know who this guy who looks like an old, methed out pumpkin. I don't know what he's gonna do for me. And then Grant walks into the parking lot. He is high as hell off of this deal. He's absolutely ecstatic. And he just goes, it's on like a bling blonde. It's on, it's on like a bling blonde.

Greatest salesman in the world, baby. Ah ha. We have to put a clip of him saying that. I'm gonna just start saying that now too. Same with identify key players. It's all like a bling blong. And then he goes greatest salesman in the world. And he again, got nothing.

He offered to do work for free. For a mattress store. How is he going to get people into a mattress store? Can you imagine him trying to sell your mattress on the street? He's going to scare the hell out of Pooptown. He's terrorizing Pooptown. He's terrorizing this man.

And so that's where we leave Grant. Grant's narrative wraps up there. For now. From, I mean, I've seen the whole show. I know how it ends. But even from this initial impression, I would say it seems like Grant is winning. I mean, just by the numbers.

He's $100 ahead. He does beat out these other two, the ladies of the show, in the first episode. He is pulled ahead of the crew. I think Elaine is killing it, though. But she's paying to stay. She's paying to stay. And she doesn't have anything lined up.

Let's get into Elaine. That's true. Elaine makes a bad deal. Elaine, our favorite, our mommy of the show. Elaine is quite the icon. So she grew up. Well, should we go back to the beginning? beginning yeah let's go back to the beginning we can establish elaine's uh sob story they are all the biggest whiners about their child yeah so she grew up poor and she sold hot dogs on the street

she all of her job sounds so made up she's like like, I sold hot dogs, and then I sold Girl Scout badges. Not the cookies, just the badges. This is actually how it went. This was her list of how she started in business. She was like a military kid. She traveled a lot, blah, blah, blah. Like, sob, sob, sob. She's like, and then I started a shoeshine company, hot dogs, bending machines.

Yes. What was her commission job? So she's really big on that commission job she had. I think she was selling shoes. She was offered a flat rate and she like negotiated a commission and then she sold so much that she was the top salesman in the company and she was like and then they tried to negotiate out her commission but i don't know what that was for i i think i thought it was for like a railroad that she made it sound like no so she picked for the railroad, she picked the name of like this, like of like May. What's her last name in the May?

May Allen. Hi, my name's Elaine Mayringe. Yikes. I chose the alias Elaine Mayringe because of Rhoda Mayringe. Yeah. And who is like this old businesswoman who diverted like railroads so they didn't go through malibu so like she's like they went through like east la or something exactly so she yeah she was a hot dog girl boss she sold vending machines um and she has like a final goodbye

dinner with her family at her house in the palisades um she's really bummed to be leaving because her kids are closing escrow yeah she's like i hate to leave when my kids are closing doesn't care about her family at all she cares about the deal you know she's a real estate developer now and like a designer. I wish I wasn't leaving when the kids were closing escrow. I have three beautiful children, Jessica, Leo, and Cosmo. And then there's Tim, my boyfriend. Hey.

Hey. And there's that. I'm gonna miss them. She's like on hands, or hands-on developer. Like there are lots of shots of her, like, you know, driving a little bobcat like bulldozer around and stuff i which i do believe she she loves doing that she seems like a type a she's very type a yeah she's very type a so she starts driving up the california coast

going to her town again like she doesn't know where she's going um she has an assumed assumed name it's just um she changed her last name to that elaine mayringe it's like a dumb name it's a duffel lane may ellen allen may elaine mayringe it's like it's like a made-up it's like rug room it's like weird yeah um and so she drives with the california coast my favorite thing about her drive there is that she has a phone mounted on the front of her like um like car console area the way you would have like you know if you're like following along with maps or whatever and she has someone telling her like literally each turn to make and i thought it was like siri at first but then i realized she had like a live assistant on air telling her each looking at her location yeah like you have like a real

life siri you're like a gay guy he's like elaine micklelaft is this she iconic oh my god elaine slow down elaine stop drinking stop drinking put the wine down so she um ends up in fresno california which is like i think it's like what like it's like desert ass california right it's it's like it's like opioid like probably like 50 of the town wiped out by the opioid epidemic. So the in-charge of the town said that it used to be a quarter of the country's agriculture. And now it's like nothing. Yeah.

Damn. So a lot of farms. That's insane. So she kind of just, she drives around and she's just like, I need a cheap place to stay. She's driving around downtown and she's just like, no one's down here. Why is no one shopping? Where's the Gucci store? Like, she's just like shocked that she's not in like Beverly Hills.

And she passes like a like 500 person like homeless encampment. Yeah. She's like, wow, this place is, there's a lot of opportunity here. Like, look at all the people who need a place to live yeah for just over the amount of money they make at their like minimum wage jobs so she starts looking for hotels she's the only one out of the three that doesn't even consider not paying for a place to stay yeah like finding something which i think is maybe a flaw because i feel like you got to get to town and you have to first seek out something that's not paid we'll say we'll say what monique does but yeah probably has the biggest she's a monster biggest life of all when it comes

to finding a place to stay um but she it's so funny because like all of their interaction with like the locals of this shit town is so sad like she talked to some guy on the street and she's like hey do you think i can find anywhere to stay for like under a hundred dollars tonight and he's just like yeah go two blocks down it's next to ihop yeah she's like so i'm going to somewhere called ihop yeah literally and she's just going to all of these like and it's always like 107 for one night is like the rate at hotels yeah but just like shitty roadside hotels with like like those exposed stairways like like motel like they're called like motel to open air motel yeah open air motels and she

is rejected from all of them because she doesn't have enough money. She then kind of... She's shocked. She can't believe. Absolutely shocked. She cannot find a place for under $100. So she then starts, like, scouting other places. And also she's dressed like a minion this whole time.

Yeah. She's clearly wearing a pair of like nine hundred dollar distressed overalls and i don't think she changes her the whole no the first four days that she shows like episode covers yeah iconic she finds she stumblesumbles across a place called Shepherd's Inn. Shepherd's Inn. And she puts it together.

It's like a bar. It's not an inn. She turns to the camera and she announces, an inn is a place where you sleep. An inn is a place where you sleep. Every city is always filled with inns and places above businesses because that's how the United States was built. Hi, my name is Elaine and I'm

at your place called Shepherd's Inn. Can you please call me back? I'm going to put my phone number under the door. And psychotically she calls them, gets an answering machine and says, hi, this is Elaine. I'm trying to stay at your inn i'm leaving

my phone number under the door and then she writes her phone number down slides it under the door she gets a call back eventually again and it works it does work it literally works which is shocking like it works she gets a call from the owner um his name is rus. She goes and meets him, and he basically tells her, like, we rent these rooms out by the month for $400, but you can stay here for $25 a night. She finagles that deal. And he goes and shows her the room, which I believe it's, like, a windowless, like, walk-in closet

with, like, a twin bed. It looks like a nunnery. It looks like where people live. It's like a shitty motel room. Yeah. It's like a hostel. She, again, is high off the deal, and she has this schizophrenic rambling about God.

She's like, God's just everywhere in my life. I feel like God is on top of my head. Hi. I'm Elaine. Yeah. Nice to meet you. I feel blessed that is on top of my head. Hi. Hello. I'm Elaine. Elaine? Yeah. Hi, I'm Russell Stone. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. I feel blessed that I found this place.

I feel kissed on the head by God, you know? I always feel like God is right on top of my head. There. She forgot about that. But then she also, like, considers not staying there because it's like a communal bathroom. Yes. And she's like, i've never in my life even once shared a bathroom with anyone which is the only place that's a quarter of the price of

everywhere else so it's like she has i know yeah she's i think she's going she's going through a bit of culture shock what's happening yeah absolutely she's really really really blown away at the fact like poor people have to live a certain lifestyle yeah she um sleeps there she wakes up the next day and she's like my neighbors love to do weed until 4 a.m they do weed and they giggle they do weed and they giggle and they do you make a goal and i'm like babe they're doing math first of all like it's also she in the intro when we first meet her what part of her like explanation to like who she is when she says i'm skinny she says there's a party ordinance in her

town that was passed in her name so she's like selling herself as a party girl but she clearly doesn't know like a single drug user no no she's very like she's like drinking like palomas and yeah like white wine she's like screening movies too loud yeah yeah yeah she wakes up and she's like drinking like Palomas and yeah, like white wine. He's like screening movies too loud. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. She wakes up and she's like, I need a better job. I need to find a job I need to work for food. And then she says I consume too much. So she's kind of accepting the fact that her need for a certain lifestyle is vastly expanding her income, which is zero at the moment yeah she then meets

um with russell in the morning and she um she's only supposed to stay for one night she's only supposed to stay for one night she shakes him down a little bit she uh no she makes such a bad deal here i think it's a i think it's a reasonable deal. But she didn't even start low. She didn't let him counter anything. She just started high. So her offer to Russell is I can't pay $400 for the month, but I will offer $500 in free

labor. No, she says $500 at the end of the month. No, she said it was $500 in labor. $500 in labor. She'll work for like $15 an hour or something until she hits 500 but i i why wouldn't you start at like three or 400 just be like yeah you need help like no one's cleaning around here i guess i guess i guess it just or just say just say that she would clean without giving a number because like yeah yeah

just like grant or he's like i I'm going to help you out. I don't take handouts. Definitely. I just don't think she's not as evil as Grant. She's kind of resting on her female charms, if I can say so. Her feminine wiles. Her feminine wiles. She's really flirty with Russell, the owner of Shepherd shepherd's inn who is a really like a married man a married

man but you can tell he's very interested he's lonely she's the thinnest person in this town she's the skinniest person any of these people have ever laid eyes on she's just and she's she's kind of she kind of demands this out of him but yeah i guess it really it's not a good ask because she did lay out a number she could have done what grant does which is ask and then have them say a number or follow up with one later um but she does start cleaning um and it's so funny because when she's cleaning up these kitchens she's just throwing away all of the food yeah well it doesn't seem like it's spoiled all of his food it's spoiled because um they closed the restaurant during covid and there's a restaurant below this inn

and she's basically like i'm gonna clean out everything from the restaurant that was left there yeah and she's like it smells like a dead body i want to fucking puke i need to shower again she hates how dirty shepherd's inn is and it does look pretty disgusting it looks bad it's it's bad after cleaning she goes to the farmer's market and she has a little which is in front of like a walmart sized victoria's secret it's like that shopping center like stone like fake stone wall victoria's secret and for some reason that's where they have the farmer's market fucking massive it was a massive victoria's secret um she goes around she has a gwyneth moment with a couple peaches. She like buys a peach for like 10 cents or something. And she eats it and she's like, I love this peach. This is so good.

This is so good. Oh my God. That is good, man. Oh my God. That is good, man. Yeah, because she's a starving orphan. Yeah. Yeah, because she's a starving orphan.

Yeah. She gets a job from one of these farm stand workers as a grape picker. She identifies a key player at this farmer's market. She's offered a job for 13 an hour picking grapes. Yeah. Which I was surprised at that because i feel like she could have easily you'll see that she spends she has multiple shifts at this place yeah and i feel like she with her look could easily have gotten like a receptionist job or

something for like 30 an hour absolutely right like she has that look yeah she's a thin white woman she's not harnessing her power i know she's actually acting like an undocumented like yes worker yeah it's like what are you like she's acting like she's running from like like she murdered her abusive husband and is on the run she's literally doing gone girls it's like she could work front desk at any of those hotels she went to or like something by the airport you know and make 25 an hour so she wakes up the next day she wakes up for her farm shift she goes and picks grapes and then after her shift she well while she's picking the grapes she does she has another Gwyneth moment where she's like I just feel like I'm in Tuscany like picking grapes at the beginning of her shift

her shift starts to end and she's like I fucking hate this shit not even it's literally like a half hour into her shift like it shows the time and it's like 7 30 wow this is amazing 8 12 oh my god i'm gonna kill myself she drives home and she's driving through downtown fresno and she's like i just need to find a vintage building because if i can find a vintage building i can use that to make a billion dollar business that's how i'm gonna do it i need to find a vintage building, because if I can find a vintage building, I can use that to make a billion-dollar business. That's how I'm going to do it. I need to start working on my million-dollar business. I'm not exactly sure what I'm going to do. The secret of my success is finding the right building,

so I just need to find a great space. Look at this building. Oh, I want to have this building. I have a new goal. I'm going to give myself five days to find a building, so I'm just going to drive around and see what I can find. I had no idea that Fresno had this kind of architecture. If I got the perfect building,

then I could maybe generate some rentals for other businesses. Let's see what's for sale downtown. If I could just find a vintage building that I could buy. Historical buildings, they have a lot of cool things that are grandfathered in. A vintage building. Golly, look at that gorgeous building.

This is a beautiful building. Let me take a look and see what I can find out about this building. It'll never work. It has all kinds of historical stuff going on with it. That is such a drag about that building. But the building is a bit of a mess. I don't have a building.

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Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. Building. I just need to find a building. Like a normal person, I just need to find a building that I can buy and do a business out of. And they're really leapfrogging the steps of gentrification. They both see these old buildings that could be turned into luxury apartments with character or whatever. But what they crucially don't have is a class of young professionals. You can't just build a like you can't like refurbish an old like like sweatshop or whatever into like a luxury apartment building if there's still homeless people you can you can turn it into like an art gallery or a coffee shop but like not

a not an apartment building she then keeps driving around looking for vintage buildings she freaks out because she can't find a vintage building um and if i'm correct she kind of wraps her story wraps up there she's not really accomplished much i mean she got rent for a month at shepherd's inn she only has 90 days to build a business she got rent at Shepard's Inn. She worked as a great picker. She made a little bit of money doing that. Like 70 bucks. Not great. Grant's still

beating her ass. It's funny because when she's looking for the buildings, she talks about buildings a little bit and she's like, something great is if there's a grandfather clause then that means that you don't have to bring the building up to code and then um on the throughout the show there are these little like quick tips that appear on the screen

yeah and the tip that appears on the screen when she says that is clauses save you money. Such a specific and rare instance. When are you going to have a clause? And sometimes I'm sure there are clauses, you know what, that don't save you money. But you lose money. You get fucked around. You lose money. And one of them kind of happens to her later

because she's literally looking at this building and she's like, I'm going to buy this building. And then she looks it up and it's like literally looking at this building and she's like I'm gonna buy this building and then she looks it up and it's like oh no it's a historical landmark I can't buy that gross we should just tear all these down she hates

that there's any protected building or land in Fresno but while Elaine may have lost a little bit we have a bigger loser the biggest loser still in the mix the absolute let's get into it get into this oh my god i hate her i hate her so I hate her so much. She's so annoying. The first sentence she says, okay, so she, she leaves from LA after Timbaland basically calls her a dumb ass for doing this.

She gets in a helicopter. She gets in a helicopter. They fake her out by going to Seattle. Yeah. And then they say, no, no, no. Oh no, no, mama. We are not going. She sees Seattle and she's like, oh my God, is this where we're going? And the pilot says, no, it's a long range helicopter.

Yeah. And really scary music starts playing. Yeah. And they go to a place that's, it's functionally a suburb of Seattle, Tacoma, Washington, which they try to say that it's like lost industry and stuff it looks cute yeah it seems like the most advanced like small american city out of the three absolutely the most like advanced in like gentrification and everything absolutely advanced in gentrification

and like pueblo is like close to denver but it's like an hour fresno i don't think is really close to any other city i may may be wrong, but. If they took a helicopter, like that's got to be close, right? I mean, they said a long range helicopter, but how long is the range of the helicopter? Yeah, I think the pilot was probably annoyed by Monique and wanted to scare her. We're going to Saskatchewan.

We're going to Japan. So she takes off in the helicopter. She lands in Tacoma. She gets her car. She's driving around. She doesn't really have much of a plan. One of her first sentences is, I need to find a safe space.

So what she does is she starts, she's like, I need to lean on my faith in this moment. She talks about how she wants to lift up the community, and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, all of this infographic stuff. So what she does is she leans on her faith, she lifts up the community by calling churches and asking if she can stay there for free. She goes to one, it's closed. She goes to another and she sees a guy walking out of the church and she's like, Oh, perfect. I can go talk to him. She's identifying a key player and the key player is a black pastor.

Yeah. 60. And she makes him pay for a hotel room for her basically. So she sobs until he agrees to get her. He goes up and she literally is like, I'm here filming a documentary about young black entrepreneurs. She's in like a Lululemon sweatsuit. Yeah.

Good afternoon, sir. How are you? I'm good, how are you? And what's your name? Pastor Christopher. I'm Monique Lene. How are you? I'm just moving here to Tacoma.

Oh, okay. Yes, sir. Trying to build a Monique Lanay. How are you? I'm just moving here to Tacoma. Oh, okay. Yes, sir. Trying to build a small business. And so they are... They're filming a documentary about small business owners and entrepreneurs. She's in a lulu. I'm so tuned. She's just like, I just got here, Pastor.

I really need a place to stay. I'm on this mission to prove that young Black entrepreneurs can, you know, thrive in America, blah, blah and he's and this pastor is on camera yeah so it's like he has he can't just turn away no you can't say no she like the other people you do get the idea that they're trying to start a business but monique is like it really does not feel like she's trying to it feels like she's like trying to avoid paying for an airbnb on a vacation or something she's the biggest scammer paying for an Airbnb on a vacation or

something. She's the biggest scammer in that. Yeah. She doesn't try. She's really not trying to make money. She's just trying to get free money. Yeah. And so there's a cutaway when she's talking to this pastor,

it's a cutaway to like an interview with Monique. And she's like, It feels so wrong to be lying to the pastor about my name and my situation. However, but I've got to do it to prove that people like me can make it in America. Okay. So the pastor literally go off books her. Oh, so her. Okay.

So her, her big lesson from this first section. Vulnerability is an asset. It is not a weakness in business. And vulnerability is an asset. Which just sums her up. Sums her up absolutely. Absolutely, absolutely. Where it's like you're someone who is like really repatience

and like really looking for a lot of stuff, but you're kind of playing up how like, how vulnerable your situation is to like curry favor and sympathy um so she goes and she gets three nights booked for her at a nice hotel it has like a hot plate i mean not nice but like it's not good it's not an inn it's not an rv she's got the best living situation out of the other but only for three days and she does nothing those three days she literally does nothing okay so here's so she goes she basically says before she does that she's like okay the people at the church are stuffing envelopes for like the n-double-a-c-t yeah yeah this is important so she's so she's like let me

help you because i don't like i don't want to take a handout yeah um even though she took a huge hand yeah so she's like for like 45 minutes stuff some envelopes she very clearly like she announced she was done here she's like so i'm deciding to do some volunteering to give back to the community it's like it's like no you're paying the community back because they bought you three nights at a hotel yeah yeah so she's going through this stuff and there's like a mailing list sitting on the table and she folds the mailing list up and puts it in her pocket and is like this has the name of all the like senator like senator alex this is a list of key players yeah all the local government members and like their contact info and it's like you just stole that from the office

like you're like doing like 45 minutes of envelope stuffing and you stole something from the church. Like you stole their contact sheet. Then look, I'm going to stay and help. Okay. And I'm actually going to keep this because this is actually a list of some of the most influential people in Tacoma and will be a great resource

to learn about the community moving forward. Well, not only that, but like, I also like there, this is the beginning of COVID. I'm sure there are people who are looking to pastors and looking to churches for a free place to stay. And you took resources away from a church that would have been diverted to something they paid like full price. It wasn't like stay in the church basement because we're kind. Yeah, the church paid like the like $ 400 for her to say yeah and she did

45 minutes of work and then stole a mailer that should have been going to someone for voter outreach yeah yeah and on that mailer is the name of a local um progressive candidate who's challenging a democratic incumbent ostensibly with a yeah like a more progressive um ballot and she calls her well her name is to wanna noble she doesn't call her quite yet she um gets in her car after identifying these key players on the mailer and she drives around and she's like i'm so hungry i haven't eaten in a full day i'm not taking care of myself and but she's she's very big on like i won't eat fast food i'm not eating junk yes she has herself a baked potato she's so this is a direct quote she's so stupid this is a direct quote

it's not she says it's not normal i need a salad and she went to some place and she's like i couldn't get a salad they were all over five dollars so i got a baked potato i got a baked potato i wanted a salad but they didn't have any salads under five dollars so i feel like i can't even think right now. I need to eat This is called hard knocks. So I'm assuming that she is like a vegetarian or vegan or something Yeah She can't go to a grocery store where everything is going to be cheaper than what you can get out like whatever drive-through She got that you got like a Wendy's baked

Why would you not go into a grocery store and spend the same like three dollars on like some carrots or something i know you know yeah literally she got a plain potato because she was like i literally can't even see right now i'm so hungry like and like it's like bitch a baked potato is not gonna help you very much this is the first tip that in the business that she runs she has no knowledge of any kind of like nutrition or healthy eating. She's never been in the food space. And she has a meltdown because she can't get a salad for under $5. And she's just like, there's no health in this community.

People really need healthy options. She goes like Michelle Obama, like school lunch on this shit. And she then. But she eats a baked potato which is like what they feed prisoners in prison to like keep them docile and like fat yeah she um has

her this is a moment of genius for her she so I'm eating this baked potato and it's making me think maybe there's a business idea here comes up with a business idea here. Comes up with her business idea because she has the salad meltdown. And she decides that she needs to go on the mission of presenting this community with ginger shots and wellness shots.

But she hasn't started production or she has no idea about a recipe. Doesn't have a juicer. She starts by going to the businesses and telling them, I already have juice. Do you want to sell my juice? She's literally walking into restaurants being like, do you want to collab on a juice with me? Yeah. Hi. Hey, how are you?

So I'm making juices. And do you guys partner with, like, local business owners? Yeah, we've done it before, but not really looking to do that now. Hello. I'm making juices. Can I try your shots? I don't have any right now.

Are you considering adding, like, a juicing component? Do you have a sample, I could leave for my manager? As of now, I don't. So it turns out... and they're all like no first restaurant like i'm not getting anywhere i i don't know what i'm gonna do well so they also the first thing they say is do you have a sample and she walks out of everyone and is like i didn't think about that didn't think about it yeah the first restaurant she goes to is a soul food restaurant called southern kitchen and she's like i noticed you don't have

ginger shots in the menu what are you talking about why would this place offer ginger shots what are you doing you're fucking so weird she does that to like yeah seven other places doesn't have any samples she has a meltdown because she has hatched an incredibly stupid business idea she starts crying she calls her mom she's like i don't want to film anymore i can't and her mom refers to her on the phone twice as the word daughter as like the noun daughter which i thought was crazy she was there like hi. And it was just so weird. Hey, daughter. Hey, mommy. So she gets some sleep in her cushy hotel room. And the next day she hits social media.

She starts talking about how no churches are responding to her anymore. She's blacklisted. Blacklisted on the church list. So she moves over to Tawana. What's her name? Tawana Noble, the progressive Senate candidate. Oh, they have some senators up. Tawana Nobles.

She is running for the senator for the 28th district. Who is in the middle of a campaign during COVID. So this is like a very- Like weeks away from the end of the campaign. Is she with an instagram account that she makes followers followers followers a fake person instagram account the most such account and she's like i wish i just had access to my old social media because it makes sense that she's definitely the kind of like random verified user who dms you and

it's like do you want like a deal you want to like she conducts a lot of business through instagram dms i believe i absolutely think that's how she's doing most of it she doesn't have her blue check to aid her here but she randomly does get a response from her cold message to one of nobles to give her shelter for free and Tawana basically just responds with email me she says yeah she says send me an email so she sends her an email and then they start talking then they start talking uh Tawana call she calls Tawana um and Tawana Nobles is just like yeah you can stay with me in the in the interview segment with Tawana Nobles it really seems like she like had skimmed the email and accidentally like agreed to let her stay with her she's like yeah you know I looked really quick

and I was like well we'll talk more later but um she showed up and then I looked I looked more into what I she was saying and uh I was like, okay. Yeah. She had sent me a message on Instagram, and because I try to be nice to everyone, I was like, yes, like, totally, email me. And I double-checked what she was telling me with Pastor Christopher of, like, did you meet someone and put them in a hotel? And he was like, yeah.

I think that they definitely, like, I'm sure that in between those two things, the producers stepped in and said, we're making this documentary about the city and about small business and about like black small business. And that's how they kind of pitched it. Because a senator on the campaign trail is not doing that.

She's not just letting you stay in your basement. So Tawana Nobles agrees to let monique uh stay there and monique's uh business takeaway from this is a repackaging of the first one she just says you have nothing to lose by asking for help which is a very convenient way of just saying you don't have to offer anything but you can ask and sometimes you'll get it. Yes. Yeah. And I think Monique's days, and this is the fourth day for all of them, Monique's fourth day wraps up there. She doesn't have much of a plan in place.

She does admit that she needs to buy a juicer and fruit so she can produce samples for these businesses. But beyond that, she hasn't made any money she also hasn't really spent any besides the um baked potato i will say she is the she's the best in securing housing but the worst at securing i don't know because three days i mean i guess then she got the free room but it's all so like it's such a heavy ask or everyone else like is pretty comfortable where they are yeah like she's like constant she's just like using someone's room in their house yeah like a busy woman it'd be so awkward yeah like i haven't even like live in a

like family home which is where she's gonna start living now yeah it's like a small house it's yeah and it's in the middle of a campaign it's like insane but so that's where we leave is doing it for the exposure that's what i mean for overall i think we can definitely say grant comes out ahead of the pack in these first four days um and these this episode was like an hour and a half long there's they all are i think no one watches this show no so i looked at the ratings and the first the first season had like low kind of like low streaming numbers but like decent and then this second season which is so much better has less than a third of what the first season has like nobody is paying attention to the show at all i've never heard it mentioned he did not get picked up for a third season it's so crazy it is one of the best shows i've ever seen it's so insane

i was losing my mind watching grant like run around and like be a psycho his his narrative His narrative gets so psychotic. He gets COVID. He, like... So angry. He's so angry all the time. He... Oh, my God. He really just... He goes nuts. They all go nuts.

But Grant, like, really, really did it a couple times. We can leave it there. The show, if you want to watch along, is on Amazon, Discovery+. I don't know. It's on all of those third-rate reality TV show apps. You'll find it. Jake, thank you so much for joining us.

Do you have any plugs? I don't have any plugs. You don't have any plugs. Okay. No plugs. Team no plug. We'll put your social medias in the app. In the app.

Thank you, mamas. We love you. In the app. Thank you, mamas. We love. Bye. We love. Thanks for watching!