Segments - 222: Baton (w/Bo Burnham!)

Episode Date: June 27, 2016

Writer/Performer/Peeler Bo Burnham in the house to discuss rich kids, close friends, and his Netflix Comedy Special "Make Happy." This episode is brought to you by Squarespace, TrunkClub, and HeadSpace! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. beautiful offer code if i were you all right now let's get into it uh exciting episode we finally had beau burnham on whoa whoa whoa we needed him we wanted him for years and years and years and our schedules finally aligned to the point where you know what he came in he he gave us his wisdom his advice uh for close to an hour of magical times true so enjoy this episode. Things obviously got real, of course. Let's get started. Shit. Kate Bees. Uh. If I were you. I'm like I'm lonely and horny.

All these podcasts, they bore me. Yeah, I'm sleeping and snoring until it's Monday morning. Till I see my two favorite Jews dropping that new If I Were You. They know just what to do. If your girlfriend has crabs, only trust the Uber uber driver no that ain't taking cabs fancy in the pitch j witch and the fucking bitch uh I'm like Serge dude I think we got the same toy you'll never win if you fucking with the game boy uh now it's time to get down to the question and I'm a scout from one to ten is it a good idea to fuck my friend's mom again she's's a Mexican lesbian Cause a smoke show and a GoPro for this dope bro Make the bitches muy loco

How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How about you? That was T-Pain.

Are they all of that quality? No, they're usually a lot worse. Yeah, that feels very worked on. What would you give that out of 10? That's like if I need others to compare it to. That's a zero and a 10. Here's 10 more just so you have a compare sampling. Bo Burnham. Hello.

How are you? I'm so well. Let me just say real quickly, that was written by Kyle, a 23-year-old rapper from Rochester. He's a rapper? He's a rapper. Oh, cool. So he's a professional. That's why it sounded like that.

Yeah, it was very good. And you got all the inside jokes, all the references to the podcast. Yeah, totally. Oh, my God. I missed a few, but Bo really did. No, I get them. I understand. It said you had co-written half of them, which is kind of interesting.

Yeah, pretty cool. As a musician yourself, I mean, you appreciate that kind of, at least the effort that it took. That wasn't an easy thing to do. I'm a fan of effort all across the board. Anything that seems like it took effort, I'm on board for. That guy said he... Good effort. That's what people like to hear when they make something and spend a lot of time on it.

Like, good effort. And then good anything else? No, just A for effort. And F for everything else. He says he goes by KBs. And if you could pimp out my SoundCloud, I would get the biggest boner ever. and F for everything else. He says he goes by KBs. And if you could pimp out my SoundCloud, I would get the biggest boner ever.

So SoundCloud.com slash Kyle hyphen KBZ hyphen Brian with a Y. Perfect. I mean, you know. Short and sweet, baby. And rolls off the tongue. That guy is somewhere with a raging boner right now because of us. Yes. That's good. So thanks, Kyle.

And thanks, Beau, for coming on the show. No problem. What an exciting day. Could I pin my SoundCloud out? Hell yeah. Okay, it's Beau with an F. Hyphen, hyphen, hyphen. One spelled out won the number.

Hyphen spelled out or? Hyphen also spelled out, yes. Hyphen spelled out. H-Y hyphen P-H-E-N. And that'll get you to a 404 page so you clear out your cache yeah you click

the middle of the zero in that delete your cookies and delight your cookies delight your why not Beau comedian

actor writer singer songwriter what do you what's your a little bit of everything I just ask that

it's inflected like that as long as people say it question mark question mark question mark every. I just ask that it's inflected like that. As long as people say it. Question mark, question mark, question mark. Yeah, every time. I just, I write things, I guess. I think. You're a writer?

Sure, yeah. You're a performer. Yeah, yeah, I know. But it's like, people that make food aren't like, I'm a boiler slash peeler slash roaster. You know what I mean? I'm like, people here are like obsessed

with giving themselves as many titles as possible. I think I make stuff and show it. that's what chefs say too yeah that's what they say they're real humble down to earth chefs yeah you're a writer slash boiler right yeah exactly slash peeler yeah i peel the old a lot of layers to me uh we're excited to have you on the show for the first time ever uh it's been a long time coming it's been a long time since ever yeah since the beginning of time yes oh right we're talking about that then a long time coming it's been a long time since ever yeah since the beginning of time oh right we're talking about that been a really long time

2000 years or something like that since the beginning of time we met once like 5 years ago 4 years ago 2010 maybe it could have been that 2006 at a music slash comedy festival that existed no no a music

and then if you looked really closely under the sea and music, you saw a tiny Amity coming off of that. Yeah, it was a music festival with, like, us in a tent the size of what? Like an aircraft, like an airplane hangar? Yeah. And us performing to 100 people. It was a music festival that had a comedy area. It started at like 11 a.m. or something. I don't remember what time we went on,

but it was not like peak comedy hours. You never want to perform comedy outside during the day in a rainstorm. Yeah. But I remember you did pretty well. You had a crowd by the end of it. Oh, yeah. What?

Yeah, but maybe. But again, we had like folding chairs and it was a wide view of the tent looked like nonsense i mean it was it looked we should have had like those dummies in the king's speech that they put up in the bleachers like the fake blow up people that would have made it a little bit easier i think uh this right here uh is what i was talking about earlier is an advice podcast uh it's a show that right there this right here this right here is what I was talking about earlier. It's an advice podcast. It's a show. That right there? This right here.

This right here. Very cool. It's all scripted down to very cool, and it's all scripted. Yeah. And that's the last thing we have written. So right now we're going to improvise. Officially, now we enter the podcast. So what happens is people will email us with their sticky situations. They're seeking our guidance.

It makes sense, right? We're wise beyond our years. And Jake and I do our best to provide our insight and our wisdom to help these people out. Sometimes it's just me and Jake. I can only imagine. Because I will never fucking listen. But sometimes we have friends in the room, in the house, and today we have you. Great. I'm excited to share what I know and project that onto other people's situations that I probably know nothing about.

That's really good. Not having a lot of context is perfect. And it's good because we get all the perspective. We get white guy, white guy, white guy. It's nice to round it out. We run the gamut. Yeah. From Europe to Eastern Europe.

Yeah. But to not all parts of Eastern Europe. And not back. Yeah. From Europe to Eastern Europe, period. These are real emails from real people. We're going to give them fake names just to preserve some level, some semblance of anonymity. It's usually our guest's discretion to give these people fake names.

I'll give you some context. This is a college-aged american boy raul so quickly finally not a white guy let's do it last name um just raul he goes by just oh i like that a lot yeah it's pretty mysterious okay raul writes hey guys about six months ago i hooked up with this guy he and i only slept together once but we texted for a while before and after. He told me that he wanted to have his hands tied while we did it because he wanted to explore kinky sex. I went along with it because it seemed pretty tame in the grand scheme of things. After a while, we stopped texting, and I didn't hear from him.

Last night, however, he texted me saying he wants to try financial domination, where the sub sends the dom money, meaning he wants to just randomly send me money i don't want to be a dick but i'm also not going to turn down free money how exactly should i handle this let me know what you guys think if nothing else i'd like to hear how you'd respond to this thanks we love raul do it all do it all tie my tie my hands up put money in my mouth rub the feet send me cash yeah where's where's the have you ever heard of findom before findom financial domination oh i thought it was sort of like maybe like some weird dolphin like fandom it is i don't know what he's talking about financial domination findom is where you give a dolphin money yeah finndom financial domination yeah have you heard of this thing well i well no i haven't but i feel like you hear of it in the other direction very often which is what well just like a guy you know a sugar daddy or a sugar you know right right right but the idea of the the guy being the

submissive like cucking with money. I guess that'd be the term. A cash cucker. Cucks for bucks. I looked up an article on Fyndham and I read it earlier. You started, yeah, you got really hard. Nothing makes my dick softer than giving money to women. I mean, what?

Yeah, it's the last thing. Like, god damn. I'm torrenting porn. I'm on the freestreaming side i'll watch an eight minute cut of a 50 when i'm signing up for like 16.99 like go go in flight my dick is receding into my body well that's the altitude a lot of it is the altitude yeah it's true it's like a bag of chips except the opposite thanks man you see find them guys on the flights just like ordering the you know the annual pass to the go-go just jerking off and they're gonna hop to like united the next flight wait a second but for real we need to slow i need to parse a

little bit of that question let's let's break it up into chunks first of all. Who saw that coming? I was there for a loop. With a name like Raul, I actually did suspect. All right. Second of all. Read it again. And weep? Yes. Read it and weep? Yes.

I'm about to reread this entire question, but in chunks. A little bit. Just a little bit. Okay, a little taste. About six months ago, I hooked up with a guy. We already got that out of the way. Already. He and I only slept together once, but we texted for a while before and after he told me he wanted to have

his hands tied while we did it because he wanted to explore kinky sex all right so like i i always doubt that the person having sex with you for the first time is exploring something it's more just like you know this is my thing yeah i've already rather than you picturing me do this with a bunch of people i'll say like, hey, I'll try it with you. And that's fine. Right. Whatever.

Sure. I'm saying that's cool. Yeah. So far, so good. And it's tying him up. So all good. Right. Yeah.

All is cool. He presented it nicely. Yeah. He said, I want to try this. Are you down? I went along with it because he seemed pretty tame in the grand scheme of things. I love that. The grand scheme of things.

Yeah. In terms of kinkiness. Eisel's cutting off people's heads. I mean, this guy's supposed to be a tie of things. I love that. The grand scheme of things. Yeah. In terms of kinkiness. ISIL's cutting off people's heads. I mean, this guy's supposed to be a tie-em-up. That's nothing. Way to use ISIL, by the way. Yeah, I know. I'm down with Barry. Whatever Barry says, I'm for.

After a while, we stopped texting, and I didn't hear from him. Last night, he texted me saying he wants to try financial domination where the sub sends the dom money. I guess the subservient sends the dominant guy money. Meaning he wants to just... I think it's submissive. Submissive?

Submissive, yeah. It's not like... Subservient. It's not like the bourgeois and the proletariat. It's like a guy fucking another dude and we need a name who gets the dick in the butt, which is cool. He wants to randomly send me money to get him off wow he's saying that he'd pay me to let him rub my feet i'm really thrown

off by this whole idea he doesn't care about rubbing feet either he just wants to pay the money yeah like it's all about oh so oh so that's it so it's not just paying money in the abstract it's like i think that's what it is like anyway because i i read this thing about i just find them you you don't just like venmo people 40 bucks yeah yeah yeah and jerk off to like when you get the paypal receipt back there's like all these subsects like some people like to be blackmailed like they'll go on a webcam tell a dumb like uh what like their deepest darkest secrets are and then they'll extort that person for money. Because I was going to say, have you heard of prostitutes?

That's a thing you can pay for. That seems like you're looking at yourself. It's not just being separated from your money. It's like being told you have to. So this person doesn't just get to chill and have money. That's very interesting. I get that. It's a job.

This guy's offering you a job. But it's also like I get it because, you know, if sex, a lot of it's about like power or whatever and like subverting that. Like the power of money and wanting to be like spanked for your little money. What's more powerful than cash? I'm with you. But I will say your delivery made it seem immediately less powerful. I wanted to disagree. I hate that I agree with you. But I will say your delivery made it seem immediately less powerful. I wanted to disagree. I hate that I agree with you.

But I also – Moolah, baby. We both did spend all the time proving that point. It's not a black and white issue. It's a green issue. You know what I mean? I do want off the podcast. But this guy – okay.

So, like, there would be a lot of advice or questions for Raul. I mean, Raul's partner or Raul's friend. But for Raul, it's like, dude's like dude like he's gonna get off wherever like you're not gonna solve this this is what he's getting off right and yeah there's not anything like really wrong with yeah unless he's like liquidating his assets and like on the street but if he's like kicking you somebody who cares and that's where the responsibility comes in maybe raul is the right person for the job because he's even concerned about in the first place. Yes. I think you have to... Anyway, I don't know if I

think this or if I just only think it because I read this article, but all these doms say you have to be very empathetic because people will just rob these guys blind. What do you mean? You're saying the doms have to be empathetic. Yeah, yeah. And he seems like an empathetic dom.

He does, doesn't he? He does seem like one. So I think he's probably the right man for the job. It seems like he won some sort of gay lottery, and he doesn't know what to do with the ticket. I know. He's like, this can't be real. Right? It says, doesn't it?

Is he just going to send me cash? Do I just, yeah. It's like that thing where they put like an open wallet on the ground in New York City, and no one picks it up, because they're like, fuck you. Because it's all a trick. Yeah, I think it's like, you where they put like an open wallet on the ground in New York City and no one picks it up because they're like, fuck you. Because it's all a trick. Yeah, I think it's like, you did it, Raul. Strike while the iron's hot. What would you do?

I think, I guess I'm like kind of good on money right now. So I wouldn't want this job in addition to podcasting and writing and stuff. Right. Because I feel like you would owe him something. But you know, if I was in college and and you do that's the thing it's not it's not so simple as you just get this guy's money and you walk away isn't that part of the financial domination though yeah but there's like yeah but there's like a weird role you have to play within that right he has he has to give you the money a certain way that gets him off like if he just if you're like

really crisp i guess it depends what kind of sub you are. You really should find out what kind of sub he is before you do it. I'm sure there's a bus that's shiny de Bloom.

That's what gets him off the flip of the de Bloom. Like Ebony and Scrooge at the end throwing the coins to the kids to buy the big turkey out the window.

He probably got so off on that. Scrooge McDuck just fucking swimming through the coins. Exactly. That sounds dope. I would do that think i think he has to find out what kind of the coins out when he does when he comes up yeah water is cash to him you need a little more information you want to find out what kind of uh sub this guy wants you to be so you're saying if it's kind of dom this guy

wants specifically if it were you you wouldn't do. Yeah, I probably wouldn't want to do it. Because it seems like it's a little too... It comes with a responsibility that you don't want to deal with. Yeah, it's kind of heavy. Yeah. Beau? I'm a sub, so this doesn't work. I couldn't even possibly put myself on this.

No, you know what? Like, I think you go for it. I mean, do you like the... The problem is, what I'm not hearing is like, do you like the guy? Because I just think like, you know, a healthy relationship, if that's what you want from this dude,

it's about being, you know, freaks for each other. Right. Well, I was also in college, so I'm all for experimenting a little bit. Yeah, and like experimenting with free money. What are we talking about?

That's like a great... You can experiment and get paid. Yeah. Do you know how many... You know how much people work And like experimenting with free money. What are we talking about? That's like a great experience. You can experiment and get paid. Yeah. Do you know how much people work to have money usually? You get to cut that part out. I do agree with you, though. It's weird.

I mean, it's sticky, especially if you don't just know what. This is one of the rare questions where I say I wouldn't do it, but you totally should. Don't do as I say. Yeah. Don't do as I say. Don't do as I do. Do as I say. Yeah. What about you?

I'll say take the money and run. You can't run. Why not? Because you have to do some fucking weird thing so this guy can come. What if he comes to running? There you go. Imagine the treadmill. The stickiest treadmill ever.

What if he just like that opening scene in Glorious Basterds where she's running in the distance? I mean, that's what he wants baby. Au revoir so shut up. I'll drink my milk you take my you know I say embrace the beauty of what's happening. Yeah it's a rare treat you found

a jewel pick it up you found a wallet in the street in New York have at it alright we got another question from another dude with another name what is that name? Dangren what's that? All right, we got another question from another dude with another name. What is that name? Dangren. What's that?

Dangren. D-A-N-G-R-I-N. Last name? Smith. I'm done thinking this shit. It took me all the fucking juice in my brain to come up with dangren that is one of my favorite answers dangren smith writes hey guys my family and i are taking a trip to the bahamas soon the trip is the makeup for my graduation trip last year which was moved due to my grandmother having health issues thankfully she's fine now here's my. Boy, is this a white guy question. Here we go. We are

writing this, I mean, the privilege of your life. Oh, your 80-year-old grandmother is fading away. She's through the woods on this one. Replacement for my graduation gift. Holy shit. We took a heart from a healthy kid in a really poor neighborhood. I'm guessing the word Syria won't be appearing in the rest of this question.

I don't think I can make, I don't think I can take my baton, the weapon kind, to the Bahamas when I go through customs. Reason being is because... I feel for the kid. I feel for this kid.

Reason being is because my family is chartering a private plane, so they will go through our luggage very thoroughly. Fuck off. However, I think I need... Is this real?

I think I need... This is such a dangren. What a fucking dangren frothing man. He's got a long line of dangrens, too. Oh, my dangren the seventh. Oh, my God. So many dangs. Not out of wrens. However, I think I need one while I'm in some of the areas we will be going.

I feel that my family, and myself of course, could be in danger at times. So, Jake and Amir, my question is, and Beau, do I sneak something in my bag past customs? If so, what? Keep in mind, I'm not really a knife guy. Or B, do I find something when I'm there? Keep in mind, it'll be in rougher areas, so maybe I can get something while I'm down there. Thanks, guys.

Really love the show. Love, Dangren smith dangren i love first of all i like that he thinks there's a chance that he might be able to go out into a rough area and acquire a weapon when he's on vacation um i don't know bo what do you think this one's that's rough for me this kid sounds like a fuck like a joy yeah Like a true. You can lay into it. I mean, I'm just saying like you're. Our goal is to not advise him on what weapon he can get in. Private.

Some rich kid's worried about if he can bring his baton on his private plane. Yeah. It's a very rich weapon to have in the first place. To his makeup Bahamas thing. I imagine he's not going to a very rough area of the Bahamas if he's getting there on a private jet. Yeah, I don't think so. And if there's bad guys, I don't know what him and his baton would be able to really do. God. I thought one of the joys of flying private was that they don't, like, they're not like the...

Well, you can bring your batons. Bring your batons. My private. I thought that was what it was. Yeah, wasn't that the log line? That's how they sell you on it. I'm going to go on a limb. This might not be kind.

I bet his grandmother wasn't a good person. I'm just saying it sounds like old white money, and I don't think any of that's good. She was the daughter of slave owners. I don't. I mean, she was. Yeah. Yeah. It's hard to be old, rich, and nice.

It's usually two of the three. I bet her last word was something about the colored nurse make sure she didn't lift anything off my person i'm saying this is where we as white men need to stand up and give a little self-hate yeah that was that now that is is that the richest question you've ever that's the richest question i've ever heard uh that's up there we get a lot of questions about like kids who are backpacking through Europe. Yeah, but that's its own thing. Because you can do that in the budget. I mean, this kid says just swimming in money.

Again, like Scrooge McDuck, swimming in gold coins. I think this could easily be Raoul's lover. There's a good chance. I mean, this kid is throwing away money. The thread goes through every question of this episode. I'm sorry. None of this was kind when I said. No, it's okay. No, it's fine.

I just don't... Isn't a baton just a stick? Yeah. Yeah. What's he going to wear? Couldn't he not acquire a stick when he's in the Bahamas? I thought a baton was something you twirled. Yeah, it's like a tea stick.

Oh, it's a tiny... It's a tiny... It's like the British bobbies. When you're in the airport, see if you can buy devil sticks. Oh. And that's three batons right there. You fashion that together. You start warding off all sorts of bad guys.

Did you ever have the devil sticks? Oh, yeah, totally. And the skippets? We should get a pair of devil skippets. We should get a pair of devil sticks for the office. I don't want to get too distracted but load up amazon uh by devil that's really distracting of course baton feels just like a really rich term for a stick doesn't found a stick and it's like mother i found a baton it's like oh dangren there's batons all

over the yard this season it's like fuck jesus christ this he seems to be like a nunchuck kid have you ever have a nunchuck friend? The kid that, like, kind of fucked with nunchucks? Yeah. I never had a friend like Dangren. I'm sorry. I don't know what this is. I'm sorry.

The makeup trip for my graduation, which just makes me... This is going to seem mean, but if I'm being mean, I apologize. But what it sounds like is like, oh, man, like, I didn't get to do anything for graduation because grandma died. It's like, we'll make it up to you. We'll go to the Bahamas. Graduation from high school or college? I would guess high school.

All right. Well, I mean, either way, graduating is so like... Yeah, bottom of the... That's base level is the graduating. I guess. And also, if it's college, then that's like a present your parents already gave you to go to college in the first place.

Yeah, and like, it's like a party where like your aunt's sitting down and you're like, have a beer like at 10 o'clock and you're like,

whoa, I mean, isn't that what like graduation parties are? graduation parties are like, let's hop in the jet, guys. Did you bring your baton? No, sorry.

Like all of the, the whole family getting cornered. But truly, I'm not someone that like, have nothing mother and i'm not some like inherently self-hating white dude that thinks like all white people's problems are not legitimate but this one's not bringing being able to bring a baton to the bahamas on your private plane feels like what white propaganda cartoons would be like if they were made now. It's like, we're not like that. I'm definitely for it.

Everything is kind of subjective, and I understand that everyone struggles with things. But I'll go on record and say that Dangren is not experiencing anything close to the real world. No, I think very few people live in such a bubble that they're upset that they can't bring a baton on their private jet.

Yeah, my advice would be Dangren, brace for the real world. Brace for impact, Dangren. It is coming. I feel a little bit bad. How satisfying would it be to just see as the private plane explodes oh my gosh and a twirling baton crash into the atlantic we found this stick but besides that there's no evidence oh mercy single tear rolling down the grandmother's cheek

uh she's the only survivor oh my god she's unbreakable think about it she was sick last year and survived i know the plane crash didn't get her oh she's unbreakable. Think about it. She was sick last year and survived. The plane crash didn't get her. Oh, she's better now. Yeah. Oh, okay. So that's fine. Yeah.

He's never even experienced the loss of a grandmother. I know. That's like the most base level first sad thing that happens to you. And it's like nothing. It's like truly. The very first bad thing you go through is supposed to be. He has an 18-year-old goldfish that won't die either. Amazing.

Yeah. Hamsters just constantly pets around them never ceasing to live no they've died multiple times but the maid goes out and gets new ones and it's like dangren sorry i was taking your goldfish for a while even the maids have died exactly and the goldfish replaced them it's very beautiful not allowed to experience sadness no no no, no. Dangren does not know about 9-11. Has not been told about 9-11.

He was born on 9-11. He's going to be sort of sad in the cockpit and the pilot's going to come back with a baton and say, Dangren, we got this for you. They'll carve it out of the femur of a dead child in the Bahamas. A starving dead child. And he still won't be satisfied. This isn't my baton from home.

He leaves it in the hotel room. That advice i think it is but then again i haven't been listening for the past 11 minutes we're not even recording oh good i feel bad no don't feel bad okay well all right fine we rolled into advice i think he can find a piece of driftwood on the beach and use it as a weapon. Yeah. I also think, though, that sometimes introducing a weapon into a situation will escalate said situation.

It's a worst-case scenario. Don't think it's gonna happen, but some islanders are trying to rob you. But that's the other racist shit about this that, like, I'm hearing, which is, like,

we're going to a brown island. I must bring my baton like it's like he just imagine what the fuck do you think you're like you're fine you're gonna go to like sandals resort and drink and like have you been to those i've been to those places like in mexico like in uh cancun where the they don't let you off like the entrance to it you can't it's like it looks like jurassic park yeah yeah yeah, yeah. It's an enormous fucking gate. You have to have four forms of identification to get onto it. They don't let people who want to hurt you, or they don't let anybody that you might think who would want to hurt you into it.

He's imagining him and his family tied up in a giant bowl of boiling water, surrounded by this island tribe. By poor people. Like, oh, we're poor. Yeah. We want to kill you. We want your money. Some sort of financial domination, some shit. All right, in conclusion, you'll be fine. Don't bring a weapon.

Odds are your family's going to be safe forever, probably. Yeah, forever. Forever. Forever safe. Congrats, dude. All right, let's take a little break. Forever safe. Congrats, dude. All right, let's take a little break. We'll thank a few sponsors. We'll be right back with more questions and more Bo after this.

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There it is. Thanks, DraftKings. And we're back. There it is. Thanks, DraftKings. And we're back. Bo Burnham, I saw your Netflix comedy special. Thanks. I saw it too. So good.

Huge fans. Thank you. I didn't just see it. I didn't just see it because you were coming on the show. We're actually, I'm actually a pretty big fan of yours. Oh God.

I don't know if you know this. Well, maybe you don't. We used to, at the College Humor Office, our job, me and amir and like a few other people our job was to find videos to put on college humor oh yeah i remember and when there were new bo burnham youtube videos we wouldn't like even it's not like we watch them to review them we would just like have oh that's very everyone in that office would just oh that's very sweet it was doing that sketch with you guys was so fun. Oh, yeah.

Playing guitar to get laid. Playing piano to get laid. Yeah, it was really fun. Which is one we should have met. But the comedy special is so mature and evolved and adult, and it's so impressive for not only someone your age. It's so fucking tech-heavy. Oh, thanks. Holy shit.

The cues on that are like... Yeah, it was a different process with this one. The last one I did on Netflix was... Well, what's it called, first of all? This one's called Make Happy. The one before was called What. Got it. And the one I did with that,

I was just sort of like experimenting with little lights and sound and tech and stuff. And then with this one, I hired a sound guy, hired a lighting guy, and I sort of wrote the bits with the tech in mind. And then we rented out a little warehouse in Philadelphia and like like tech the show fully with the lights for two days and then traveled with you travel with that yeah yeah the thing is like the show looked exactly the same when it was in other venues like you know as opposed to specials like you know adding all

this tech onto it that is the show that we've been doing it like after every show we'd talk about the cues and what worked and what didn't so this so the tech of the show was we've been doing. After every show, we'd talk about the cues and what worked and what didn't. So the tech of the show was worked with the show. It was actually part of the process. It was so precise, like down to the splits. Yeah, they knew the show inside. It was like we were sort of like a little weird band. That has to be the hardest thing, because we have

a single fucking music cue or something and it comes on four minutes late as we're off the stage. I mean, that's almost as hard as writing the show. Yeah, they were good. And we were in sync by the end with it. But yeah, it was like trial and error. It was just like working.

We worked out the tech the same way we worked out the material, just feeling it out. And by the end, they were on the same page as me timing-wise. So you do a whole tour, and then the last show is the special or yeah sort of yeah i did a few more this year after it and you tape one show and that's it tape two two performances in one night that's awesome and i noticed you kept in like heckling and stuff like that yeah they kept one thing in just because it was like you know it just it just happened it happens a lot of my shows and they're like weirdly, they sound like positive heckles which is the problem

because I think the problem in my show is that it sends out the impulse of a concert a lot and in a concert you can scream as much as you want

but then all of a sudden it gets really, really quiet and everyone's still like, whoa, oh, people just don't quite know what to do

when it's for years. So it's like, you know, I don't mind it as much as other people do right um but it's just like just you know just calm down a little bit right and then how much would you say it's like 80 music 20 just like oh i don't know i hope that it sort of just bleeds into each other you know i feel like before my stuff felt like you know i would do little

poetry and jokes and music and stuff but i hope now it all kind of just blends into one weird thing, you know, where it's like, because I don't really think about that. And it's funny, I was reading your AMA, you did a Reddit AMA yesterday, and you were talking about how you are a fan. Wow. Yeah. Actually, I was a mod on that AMA. You never answered

all my questions. You were talking about your character on stage, which is so interesting, because it's just you. Yeah. But it's you acting as though you're somebody else. Because we're talking to you now, and you're a different you than the bow on stage. Oh, yeah, for sure. I mean, well, like, what I am up there is like, you know, three years of working to be like that for an hour.

So that isn't me at all. Do you have to get into character or you just walk on stage? No, no, no. It's just like that's how the material So that isn't me at all. Do you have to get into character or you just walk on stage? No, no, no. It's just like, that's how the material's done for the right purpose. I don't know,

there's a bunch of weird stuff in the show for me just about, this show in particular is supposed to be about the weird relationship people have with their audience. Yeah.

So part of it is playing with the distance of what I actually am versus that. And, you know, part of it is playing with the distance of what i actually am versus that and you know part of it is like clarifying it is too much would would take the rug out from underneath it where part of it's supposed to be a little strange you're not supposed to know what's real and what's not and what's honest and what's not because you know there's so many i just find the honest comedians getting up and talking about their honest days when they're multi-multi-millionaires and flying private. They're like, they're danglers.

They're danglers. And they're acting like they're everyman. So for me, it's just the show, a lot of the show is about just trying to throw a little light on what is really honest about this. And can we be honest with each other? And is this real? Or is this, you know, am I pandering to you? Am I being honest? Or am I doing a little of both?

Am I a hypocrite? You know, and not trying to resolve that stuff, just kind of like ask it. What I like the most about, or I like a lot of stuff, but what I noticed the most is even within your songs, you are like responding to what you think the insults will be about the songs. Like your love song that ends with ends with talking about how you know everything

because you're 25. I forget the exact line. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's just like, you already know how people are going to react to a 25-year-old telling them about how low. Well, yeah, I think that's the thing of like, that's the weird way that things are communicated now. Especially on digital platforms is that before you even say the thing you're qualifying the thing it's all like me watching

you watching me watching you you know it's just like straight for the straightforward narrative version of stand-up that i think people love and i love because it's so stripped down in a world full of all this bullshit you just kind of have someone getting up and saying something unfiltered i like that but i also wanted to make a theater out of make some weird show out of how confusing it is out of the fact that like this is weird i'm standing up here and you're out there and this is strange and you know i'm trying to manipulate you to like me but i'm also calling out the fact that that's happening. Yeah, and there's no, like, answer.

There's no conclusion that you want anyone to draw. No, I'm happy. Let's all think about the same thing. Yeah, exactly. I'm happy, like, for, like, 13-year-olds when they grow up and become, like, sociology professors, I'm happy to see what they think. But right now I just think there's so many new things happening so quickly that for me, I have no thesis. I just have like a description of what it feels like, which is just like dizzying and strange and messy and weird and gross. Yeah. And ultimately kind of nice.

Yeah, of course. But you guys feel. And I think everyone feels it like on a certain level, not even if they have a giant audience. But I feel like everyone has their own little audience. Yeah. I mean, whenever this type of – Online is very, very strange. When this stuff happens to us, it's like it doesn't it feel surreal and i'm like i

it's this weird thing that i can't the easy thing to be is or the easy thing to say is like oh yeah it's all it's so insane it's crazy and i really appreciate it but at the same time like all this stuff washes over me in some way too like i don't even fucking notice a lot yeah and i think we're so used to it and And I think like, right. And you know, isn't that different than like my sister on Instagram or I'm just saying like, everyone's kind of relating to each other as a performer and audience.

And that's no weird way. You know, your sister's on Instagram, not a private account, private account. What's her name? I do realize this. Ro,

Rosie, Rosie. You're do realize. Ro, Rosie. Rosie. You're so close. Ro Burnham? Rosie Burnham. Rosie O'Donnell is my sister. Oh, my God. Rosie O'Donnell actually did reach out to me and said she liked my special, and that was very surreal.

That's fucking cool. I was like, am I in a league of my own? No, I didn't say that. That's my only brag I'll ever do is Rosie O'Donnell. But, yeah, so, you know, I'm just, who knows? I think people are skeptical of a lot of stuff and I just think celebrity is the worst fucking thing in the world. Yeah, that comes across. I'm a hypocrite for saying that. I know.

I know I'm a hypocrite for saying that, but you have to be a hypocrite to say it. I'm like, when people are like, yeah, but you want, I'm like, yeah, no shit. That's how I know this thing. That's why I'm an authority on people are like, yeah, but you want, I'm like, yeah, no shit. Like, that's how I know this thing. That's why I'm an authority on it. Yeah, yeah. Because I'm like in it and it's so weird and awful.

You talk about how like the best thing in the world is to not have an audience on the stage while speaking to an audience. Yeah, of course. It's such a real moment. Yeah, and everyone's like, wait, but, and I'm like, yeah, the but is the part of it. I'm saying that like that's, it's meant to be contradictory and strange. How much of it, like this social media stuff, you seem like you're wiser, cynical beyond it. Like, I don't want to use Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram. Do you feel like you have to use it to self-promote?

Or do you actually like using it? I signed up for Snapchat the other day, and immediately I'm like, oh, I'm going to delete this in 24 hours. This is really strange. But I just did it because I love the filters. I just wanted to see a little dog on my face. That's so fun. But no, I don't think they're inherently bad. I'll throw out a joke or promote things.

I think it's good to connect with people. I just think it's like I think it's oversharing is a little gross. They're just gross parts of it. It's not about, like, that this thing is evil and horrible. It's more that just, like, it doesn't seem to be questioned at any point. Or it doesn't seem to be, like, no one seems skeptical towards any part of it. And it's like, I'm just saying, like, aren't we all kind of feeling gross?

Aren't we all a little sick to our stomach? Aren't we all, like, do we all just kind of feel more bummed out and like less happy because of this thing and like so unsatisfied are you as addicted as uh most people our age to these things oh sure so you're waking up and checking it right away to feed yeah but but i'm not really the thing is i'm not addicted to like posting at all yeah i don't like sharing things i don't share any of my personal life with it i think that that's, you know. And all these, like, and I'm not very famous, but very famous people that, you know, complain about, like, their life being invaded. It's like, you invade your own life.

You share everything. The only reason people care about your relationship is because you're talking about it all the time. Yeah, people are trying to tell the paparazzi sometimes when they're going to a restaurant. Yeah, of course. And like, I can't believe the paparazzi were outside this club on Santa Monica Boulevard. It's like, are you out of your fucking gourd? But, you know, whatever.

Who knows? I just think like comedy being in bed with celebrity just sucks. You know, other things I get. But comedy is supposed to like speak truth to power. And like, I don't think there's another form of power that's better to speak to. It makes sense that

it's not really a point that needs to be made, but just to say, hey, look, this is what's happening to me. This is crazy. I think a lot of comedians, and I get it, as older comedians, their impulse is to, let's leave all that shit outside and just talk the real shit.

Or it's like let's talk about Instagram. But like isn't Instagram crazy the way this happens? And for me it's like I can't even get there. There's so much in the way of me and you having an honest conversation because like this isn't a dinner. Like what is this? There's 2,000 of you showed up to do this and i'm gonna get up and act all like we're friends you know so for me it's like i the show is like striving to be on the idea of the show i think is it's striving to be honest but it's

trying to get past all this bullshit first and it never gets there you know so that's right so you can't have an honest conversation so it's better just be honest about what's like the transaction that's happening yeah the dishonesty that's happening and i think i think people closer to you know what is our generation coming up will be a little more obsessed with that because i think that's the that's the the the way we communicate is by calling out how disingenuous the former communication is i mean everyone's just's just, like, ironically tweeting, like, how bad Twitter is. It's so cool to have found solace on this app, not, you know what I'm like. Man, we just can't talk to each other.

I mean, there's just so much crap in the way. Right. You know, so. But again, I very much appreciate and like and am so happy for comedians that are able to get up and shut the world out and like you know there's a comedian my like gerard carmichael is my age when i watch him it's like oh man he's able to just put everything out of his mind and and you do feel like you're just having a conversation with him you do feel like the world disappears and he is just like sitting

talking with you i'm not able to do that i do the exact opposite you know i just i try to um yeah i guess draw attention to the the things that I probably should be ignoring. Well, the special is called Make Funny. Make Happy. All good. That's okay. Have you thought about Make Funny? I've heard Make Funny a lot.

A lot of people said Make Funny. Make Happy, and it's on Netflix, and I highly recommend it. Everybody has Netflix. You can watch it right now. That's very nice. Do you want to try to answer one or two more questions? I definitely do because I feel like I was very negative toward Dan Gron. He deserved it.

Don't feel bad. We got an interesting one for you. Okay. And I think you won't hate this guy as much. This guy seems like a good dude. I don't feel like a hateful person. I don't feel like I hate a lot of people. I really don't.

There's something about I grew up in northern Massachusetts and there was like that... There were those rich kids around. And I just think I have like a childhood connection to hating those kids. Like bow ties and blazers. I just... I get really angry. I understand.

This is a cool dude's name. And it's a cool dude. So what's a cool dude's name, and it's a cool dude. So what's a cool dude's name? Motorcycle. That's correct. Which is a cool dude thing. Wait a second.

Last name? Smith. I love that. I think he's also related. Cousin? All right. Hey, guys. Motorcycle Smith here. Long-time listener, first-time writer.

I haven't had a problem that I thought I needed to write about until now. My friend came out as gay to me and only me a few months ago, which I'm totally Gucci about. The issue is I think he wants me to give him some experience. Not so Gucci. He's commented a couple of times that he thinks I'm cute. And while I appreciate the compliment, I sense a deeper motive. Like when he straight up asked if he could give me a blowjob. What's the subtext there?

How do you read between the lines? What does he mean? He's been a great friend to me all throughout high school. And I think he's the Jake to my Amir or vice versa. So maybe I should just let him give me a bro job to equal all the times he's been there for me. I mean, I like blowjobs and I'm no stranger to the act, but from a dude, my best dude, I'm not sure. Would it be wrong? But maybe I should just let him for an early Christmas gift or something, or just leave it until he finds an equally gay pal to do it.

At least that guy would enjoy it. If one of you two came out as gay, would you let the other one suck you off for experience? Thanks. Love, Motorcycle. P.S. Come to Wales. No. Ever been to Wales? I come to Wales all the time.

I watch Free Willy and jerk off. I will say you're a good friend. Yeah, right? No, just, I mean that. say you're a good friend. Yeah, right? No, just, I mean that. You're like a good friend. Just for even considering it. No, yeah, just for like being cool about it. For entertaining the notion.

Yeah, yeah. I agree. Yeah. That being said. I almost feel like any decision you come to is right. I'm just saying like you seem like you're in such a good head space. He was so thoughtful about it. Is it possible that he's,

that this guy might be a little bit gay? This guy? Yeah. Right motorcycle? Yeah, because just as, I mean, to entertain it so much to the- I don't think so. Like, I don't think there's any world

where I would consider letting a mirror blow me. Whoa, I'm right here, dude. I'm sorry. What if it was someone you knew less? Would you be more or less inclined to do it? No. For, say, a Bo Burnham type. Not necessarily you, but...

I can tell you I can't write things. No, it's happening. Everybody listening at home thought that Bo just blew me. No, I mean, he's what? He's like a high school kid. Yeah. Yeah, it's not... First of all, it's not weird.

Whatever. I mean, the weirdness? He's like a high school kid. Yeah. Yeah. First of all, it's not weird. Whatever. I mean, the weirdness would be like whatever happens going forward. I don't think it's a problem that he's saying that to you. I think the fact – his lack of coyness is actually appreciated. He's saying that, like, can I do this? You know, I think you can go – I think, like, if you want to do that for him, sure. I mean, I don't, I think you can go, I think like, if you want, like, if you want to do that for him,

sure. I mean, I think, It's such a huge favor for the rest of, It's not a huge favor to let someone blow you. There are bigger favors

in the world than letting someone blow you. Yeah, like blowing them. That would be a bigger favor. Yeah, that's a bigger favor, for example.

I mean, you seem like you're not completely uncomfortable. I wouldn't say you seem gay, but you seem not uncomfortable with it. In the spectrum of being like, you know. The Kinsey scale. Yeah, the Kinsey scale. He seems like he has, I don't know which is, six is the most gay.

And zero is the least gay you can be. This guy's maybe a two. And I guess if you're a two and you're comfortable with it then that's fine yeah basically it comes down to ever let i don't think you should get a blow job or give a blow job based only on a favor well then it should be two favors half of the blow jobs you've received in your entire life you think what that girl was just hungry for your cock every time give me a break you brought it to dinner oh like Jesus Christ, if favor blowjobs are out of the question,

what are left? What's the other kind? What's the other kind of favor? A hundred percent. It's too much of a one-sided. Yeah, I don't know that this guy wants to give a blowjob that's like...

Yes, he does. He just wants to feel a dick in his mouth. I feel like he's the guy that's gay... Yes, he does. He just wants to feel a dick in his mouth. I feel like he's the guy that's gay and hasn't blown someone. I feel like your virtual reality is a good compromise here. This guy puts on the goggles. He's looking down. He's seeing a chick. He's getting

blown. It's actually the guy. Suddenly everyone's getting off in a positive way. The guy's getting off to getting his dick sucked by a virtual woman. The guy who's blowing is enjoying it because he gets to suck his best friend's dick. I'm just not sure. I'm saying, what is the scenario for you, Jake? What's

the bad way this pans out? Because I'm saying the worst way it pans out is like, for me, he goes soft or something. It's like, eh, sorry. I'm not gay. This doesn't work. It gets complicated and it's already a little complicated. Because they're talking about it. I'm not saying do it, but I'm saying it's not like, don't do it. Right. I don't work. I guess my fear – It gets complicated and it's already a little complicated. Because they're talking about it. I'm not saying do it, but I'm saying it's not like, don't do it.

Right. I'm not trying to scare him too much, but there's a world to me where he has an experience that he didn't really want to. It's an uncomfortable thing for him. The friendship gets ruined. Maybe he grows to resent him in the future. Maybe that makes him have a deep-rooted distrust for gay people. Oh. No, no. He's so young.

He's so young that he's – You're saying this could set him up on a path to getting homophobic? I'm saying there's a world where this guy feels pressured into letting somebody blow him that he doesn't want to blow him. And I don't think that that's a good thing. Okay, let me get a question for you. Yeah.

He's motorcycles friends with a lesbian who says, I'm... I know this is not totally comparable, but I'm just saying, like, I think there's a little bit of, like, you know, if you're not into it, who, you know, whatever. He has a lesbian friend who says, I've never blown a guy. I'm

very curious. Now, that would be totally fine. Oh, shit, I'm homophobic. Because that's, like, I think that's a little bit. I just thought that was hot. Not homophobic. It's not homophobic. It's more like, you know, you're a kid and whatever. You put a little of your friend's pickle in your mouth. Who cares? It's 2016., you're a kid and whatever. You put a little of your friend's pickle in your mouth. Who cares?

It's 2016. So you're saying zoom out to the point where blowjobs don't really mean anything. But wait, does that make me homophobic? I know I'm one of these things. No, not homophobic. No, it's fine. I might be homophobic or I might not respect women because I'm like, oh, I don't want these two boys to – Well, I think homophobia and that go hand in hand often.

I think a lot of homophobia is, you suck dick? That's like what women do. Truthfully, I do think that a lot of homophobia is misogyny, just like in other clubs. I really... I might be like... There might be some sort of deep-rooted homophobia in me, but I try really hard to be open. But I guess what I feel when I think about this type of thing is like i really want everybody to have a very enriching sexual experience yeah and in like the rainbows and butterflies world

where like everyone's happy that i always try to create i want this gay man who wants to blow another guy to find a gay guy so they can like 69 each other and and have like a beautiful simultaneous climax versus him like blowing a half chubby dick in his parents basement okay i i get that but i would say that in the real world of sexual congress being pretty messy and emotionally manipulative and a little terrifying two friends that are kind of like, should I do it? It's like, you know, like whatever. I'm saying there's – No, it's really easy for me to come around to that idea.

I'm just saying because I feel like if it was like a guy and a girl or, I mean, give me a break if it was two women. Oh, no, no, no. No, no, no. This is true. Tell me if it was two girls right now and a girl no. This is true. Tell me if it was two girls right now and a girl was like, I guess I'd let my friend go

down on me. You'd be going like, oh, let her. You'd be like, do it now. I think there's a part of me. Would you be going,

that'd be weird and don't do that with her because girls experiment all the time. It's totally fine with girls experimenting. Right, the making out and what's wrong.

Or even like kind of like, I'd be more conflicted, but my advice would be the same because I don't want people to have the only i guess like a lesbian blowing a guy no i get that that's different for because he has no access yeah like right and she's got no access to a another penis or not necessarily no access but like he has no access to other yeah i'm saying he's like in the closet and really probably scared just came out to him right saying i'm so scared to go in the world can i just like put it in my mouth for a second my life is hell so i'd be like you know go for it dude

like it's fine why don't you say like hey dude i fuck i respect where you're coming from i don't want you to suck my dick but we're gonna find to find you in here. Oh, that's good. Totally. But I'm saying, I think that's your solution. He's going like, should I do it? And I'm saying, you as yourself who are of no interest in that are saying,

I truly think if he had no interest, he wouldn't even be entertaining. Consider it. Right. I agree with that. Because it's not like he's like, I really don't want this

and I feel guilty. He's going like, should I? And I'm like, I don't know, dude, should you? Like, maybe you should. I think the answer is like,

hey, if you're interested, then... Yeah. Or And I'm like, I don't know, dude. Should you? Like, maybe you should. I think the answer is like, hey, if you're interested, then. Yeah. If you have, or if like you're like, if you're like, I could do it. Do it. I think if it's like, well, sure. Yeah. If you're anything, if you're like not. You're saying if you're anything over 51%, just roll down the mountain.

What about you? What do you think? I mean, I wouldn't do it. But at the same time, I wouldn't advise somebody not to do it. So, like, it really comes down to how comfortable you are with getting blown by your friend. Why don't you baby step towards it? Have him jerk you off a little. Oh, no.

No, no. See, that's... Maybe hug, cuddle, make out with him. No, there's another... See, I think that's... Go on a couple dates. That would be strange. Like, that would be much stranger making out. You'd rather have a friend blow you than make out with them. No, there's another... That's like... Yeah, I think that's... Go on a couple dates. That would be strange. Like, that would be

much stranger making out. You'd rather have a friend blow you than make out with them. Yes. I think so. You said it so definitively and you're like, hold on, let me figure out

if that's the truth to me. Yeah, I mean, like, you can't... I couldn't imagine picturing a girl while I'm making out with a guy. Well, you could close your eyes.

Under them covers, though. Who knows what's happening? Hell yeah, dude. Woo! Ow! Ow! Ow! I'm saying,

if I was a 15-year-old kid and my best friend was gay and I was the only one he told to and he was like, for the love of God, please, I'd be like, I'm not a hard no. I'm not a hard no i'm not a hard no i'm comfortable but are you a hard yes are you hard at all regardless i'm always hard

no we're trying to be out of these jokes we're trying to be progressive tell me about it dude i'm so serious we can be fair that like there's some double standards happening somewhere about this. Yeah. You know. Totally. But why? Well, because we're – men are still – straight men are still terrified of being perceived as gay. And it's not – you can still be totally accepting.

But I understand if you're a – like in general, women aren't – heterosexual women aren't attracted to men that they think are gay. So we really – even if we're completely accepting, we don't want to be seen as that because we think it's unattractive. Even if we're not bigoted at all. It's just like I want to be – you know. You want to be strong. Yeah. As opposed to women who can feel free to experiment or identify as something because because that's sexy to me you know and so it's all weird shit fucking weird shit man uh so if i were you would you do it you

say no you say i'd say hey how the wind blows the wind is their friend's name right i yeah exactly uh i'm over the dangren blows you know i would personally probably not do it you got to be super open-minded to be down with it that's like i think this guy's a great friend for even entertaining the thought you don't you don't know the friend though i'm saying i'm not i don't i'm not picturing a 15 year old boy doing it i'm saying if i was 15 i have a best friend i'm the first person he tells yeah and then he's like i've never done it with any i'm saying if I was 15, I have a best friend. I'm the first person he tells. And then he's like, I've never done it with anyone. I'm saying you've got to put yourself fully in those shoes. This is the only podcast in the world where we will advise 15-year-old boys to blow each other.

And that was before the question was asked. All right. That's our time. Beau, thank you for coming on the show. There's a lot to be learned from those three questions. I wish the pool had been a little wider so we could have learned more about me as an advice giver. Sir, we – Just know – I just want to –

Anytime you want to come back. I want to emphasize for people, it's a very – we've got a very small field to make any assumptions by. That's true. That being said – Save your judgment. We do have 14,000 emails in our email box. We'll have you back on the show. We'll answer questions.

Because right now I think I see like a gay Occupy Wall Street. I think that's where I come off of. There are worse things. Which is fine. There are way worse things you can do. Which isn't wrong, but it's a bigger picture than that. Yeah, yeah. I was trying to think about what kind of shirt a gay Occupy Wall Streeter would come up with.

I don't know. Break the bank. Something about break the... just give me a second. Good riffs come with time. Good riffs take time. It really should be instant. Anything else you want to promote besides your Netflix special? No, just that.

Your new Snapchat? No, I'm off it. I won't even say the name. I put the handle on twitter at the description and i've taken it all off it's gonna be gone by the time it's coming out it was miserable the filters are fun the filters are fun i've always said that uh the opening theme song once again it was written by kyle his closing one is matt killer kowalski uh if you have more questions uh theme song submissions anything that email address for everything is if i reuse show

at gmail.com. Bo, once again, thank you for coming on our show. Thanks for having me. No doubt. Come back whenever the hell you want. And we'll be back next week. Deuces. That was fun.

I truly could have done that for three hours. That was really fun. I was kidding. Yes, dude. Yes, dude. Jacob, man, please save us. Yes, dude. Yes, dude. Call Amir up. Call Josh all up. Don't die in Starbucks. Oh, yes, dude. Can you please save me from my conundrums? Oh, I've been so dumb. Oh, yes, dude. Can't stop sweating, been fretting all day. See, I'm a mess, dude. Got piles of stress.

I got all of these questions to get off my chest, dude. Life just left swipe me. I'm in a cesspool. Someone advise me. I'll call the best dudes. If I were you, sure. But at least they're truthful. I need some new goals.

Like a 12-bust jack-off. Try to seize these cheeses. But I got stuck in my crab paws. Oh, yes, dude. Let's start the show now. Just email them in. They'll give you know how. Their answers contrast.

They'll put you on blast. What I would do is, mama, turn on the podcast. Yes, dude. Yes, dude. Jacob, man, please save us. Yes, dude. between a McDouble or a McChicken. Then get a small fry, a small drink, and a four-piece McNuggets.

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