Segments - 283: Prank Wars (w/Streeter Seidell!)

Episode Date: July 17, 2017

Friend and lover Streeter Seidell joins us to discuss catfishing, dick pics, and old videos.Come see our live show in Montreal! July 25 as part of JFL comedy fest.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Two days, a Monday, and the show is about to start. They are gonna make you laugh up until you barf And I don't believe that any podcast is better than these two lovely Jews And everyone that's listening is excited

You're gonna laugh your ass and be enlightened cause there are many things that I would like to send to you but I don't know how and if I were you

the show At gmail.com Will they play my song Which Gallagher brother was that? That was Lee, no, not Liam, or the other one. Noel? Yeah, it wasn't Liam or Noel. It not Liam, or the other one. Noel? Yeah, it wasn't Liam or Noel. It was the third Gallagher brother. Ted? That's right.

Ted Gallagher. Theodore, yeah. Yeah. That's really cool. He moved to the States when the family was still in England. He moved to Miami. Right before Oasis hit. He got out of there. Yeah. He has a car dealership in the Fort Lauderdale, West Palm Beach sort of area.

It was a Saturn dealership, though. So it went under. It seems like this guy keeps coming up in our theme song search. Josh No Joshua on Instagram and SoundCloud. Streeter, what's up?

What's up? You're back. I'm back. When was the last time we got to record together? We haven't seen Streeter since Australia. Yeah, but we didn't record an episode there. No, you guys wouldn't let me. I kept saying I'd love to come out and do one of the live ones. Yeah, just the timing didn't work out.

The timing didn't work out. They even set up a mic for me every time. I know, and the timing just didn't work out. It sucked. It did suck. Because it would have been so fun. Because I didn't get to do anything that whole trip. Yeah, the timing just didn't work out. Okay.. Because it would have been so fun. Because I didn't get to do anything that whole trip. Yeah.

The timing just didn't work out. Okay. But I'm glad it worked out now. Yeah. You're in LA for like 31 hours. 31 full fun hours. And we're going to try to record this podcast for all of those hours. That's so exciting.

Amazing. Lock the door. Longest episode. Time's on the clock, man. What's the record, I wonder, for longest podcast? Longest podcast episode. Two and a half hours. That's it.

Like live, like uninterrupted? Yeah, uninterrupted, longest podcast episode record. What a shit record to have. It's like that Dave Chappelle, Dane Cook thing. They did stand-up for seven hours, but a lot of it was just them just talking to the crowd. What else? What else?

It was all new shit. That's the worst part. How has it been since the last time you were on the show? I don't even remember the last time. Have you had a son since the show? Maybe. No shit. A child?

Well, at the very least, you have a new moving, talking, babbling child since the show? Maybe. No shit. A child? Well, at the very least you have a new like moving, talking, babbling child since the show. How old is... A bouncing baby boy. How old is Baby Streeter? He's a year and change.

Very good. Yeah. Very good. Do you know his birthday? Like is that something you commit to memory or is it just like vaguely May-ish?

I kind of feel like my wife will remind me so I'm kind of not remembering it. Yeah. And when it's like when he's remind me, so I'm kind of not remembering it. Yeah. And when it's like, when he's like so young, it doesn't, he doesn't know. It's not like he's like, that's my birthday today. And he also doesn't know who I am. He doesn't know

I'm his dad. You know, I'm a guy who's around every now and then. So you feel like you don't need to know his birthday as long as he doesn't know who you are? Yeah, exactly. Yeah. You think it's like that much of a two-way street between you and a 14-month- You think it's like that much of a two-way street between you and a 14-month-old? There's like that much

of a give and take there? Yeah. I wonder when it is, how old are you when you're first like, we gotta do something for my birthday. How do you work it out? You said he only knows the words hat and hot. I'm gonna get what Amir said there. I don't know, three? Three? At three, do you know your birthday?

At four, do you remember knowing your birthday? I'll tell you this much. His first birthday, I made him a dope cake. You made it? I made it. And it was a five-layer cake. And there was dope in it? It took me days.

There was a lot of heroin in it. That's awesome. And I brought it out, and he just couldn't care less. So he definitely didn't know it was his birthday at one. But did he like the cake? No, not even. He didn't like the cake? It was heartbreaking. Yeah, it is weird. You little ingrate!

You have to do a lot of stuff for your child and then they don't even, they can't talk, they can't express appreciation. They won't remember it. So where do you muster up the, let's take Baby Streeter to a zoo. Let's take Baby Streeter to a zoo, let's take Baby Streeter on a trip? I mean, the thing you should do is you shouldn't do anything until they're like five, because that's when you start remembering things.

But I think what happens is you do all this stuff when they're babies and they're not going to remember it. By the time they're five, you're just burnt, you know, and you just become a bad parent then. Yeah, and I've seen like babies at Disneyland, like you're carrying a two-year-old to Disneyland. That seems insane. It seems hard.

Seems crazy. Yeah. I guess I agree with that. I wouldn't want to take like a hard vacation. Like Disneyland is like lines and expensive. But I would do like, hey, we're going to go out to the country for a week. Yeah, but that's like also a vacation for you. Right.

Yeah, yeah. I would take, I'll take my vacation. With the child. To Disney World by yourself. I would take, I'll take my vacation. With the child. To Disney World by yourself. I'm not doing jack shit for the kids. Yeah, but you take him to zoos and stuff, right? Yeah, I take him to the zoo. He likes the animals.

That's nice. But he also likes flushing the toilet. So it's like there's, you can kind of get that free. That's a fraction of the price. That's just your water bill. Yeah. And you know, that's split among all the units in the building, so it's not a big deal. Oh yeah, you also moved, right?

I moved, yeah. I changed it up my whole life. The Australia tour was so upsetting to me, I got home and I said, I need to change a couple things. What's your new address? What are you working at? Well, I don't want to... I'll tell you when we're not recording. I don't think I just want to

put it out there. No, just tell us. Yeah, we'll bleep it. You know, I'm't want to... I'll tell you when we're not recording. I don't think I just want to put it out there. I'll bleep it out. No, just tell us. Yeah, we'll bleep it. You know, I'm not going to do that, I'm afraid. What are the addresses of your houses? Mine? Yeah. 501 West. I'll give you a mirror.

501 West. Jim Ave. That's Jim Ave. West Jim Beam Ave. All right, you've been on the show before. You get it. It's an advice show. We give advice to people

that need it people will email us ifireashow at gmail.com the opening theme song mentioned that email twice I will say we're running a little low again on theme songs so if you've been sitting on a good one send it on down to ifireashow at gmail.com these are questions we received over the

past couple weeks we have interns now at HeadGum did you know that? yeah so now at HeadGum. Did you know that? Yeah. So we got HeadGum interns. Oh, yeah, you applied. I totally forgot that. I did, yeah. You needed college credit. I did.

It really hurt my heart to see you apply. Tell me at least I made the short list, though. Well, you know you didn't get the Skype interview. I didn't. No, I know. So we interviewed about a couple people. I never actually formally heard back, but a couple weeks went on and I just figured I

It was hard to get back to everybody, so. Was there a lot of applicants? Not really. We loved your application. The timing didn't work out. The fact that you write for SNL would have been such a perk here, but you're just- I know. So I thought that I would have been at least at the front of the pack because of that.

Yeah, Streeter does have the summer office. But you're 34. Yeah, I am. You need to be able to get a college credit. Yeah. So, yeah, Streeter does have the summer office. But you're 34. Yeah, I am. You need to be able to get a college credit. Yeah. So, yeah, that wouldn't have worked out. I understand.

The timing just wouldn't have worked out. It's not a timing thing again. I think you guys are misusing that word. All right. It's a catch-all. We got a good one

about a straight male friend receiving dick pics. What do you want to call this guy? Oh. Yeah, you get to call this guy? Oh. Yeah, you get to give him a fake name. Mmm. Mmm.

Todd Marsh. That's good. Todd Marsh. That's like a South Park character, right? Oh, is it? No. Randy Marsh. Oh, yeah, Randy Marsh.

All right, Todd Marsh writes, I found myself in a bit of a sticky pickle, if you will. I met this guy a few months back, and we've become good friends over similar interests. It is important to note that I am gay and he is not. Got it. So he is gay. Friend is not. This was not an issue until he started jokingly coming on to me. He is very attractive. So I figured it was just something hot guys do to mess around with gay men, right? Well, fast forward to Christmas, and he sends me a naked picture. I mean, what is that? When I asked him why he did it, he said it was a joke.

Is this something straight men do? If this was a joke, why was he erect in the photo? I can see a flaccid snap, but a full salute? Shortly after, he got a girlfriend, and the joke flirting stopped. After they broke up a few weeks later, though, it started again. Then for my birthday in March, he sent me another picture of himself naked, again penis in hand, hard as discreet math. He swears to me that he is straight and he was just joking around,

but what do I do? I like seeing his dick, but it seems very weird and makes me uncomfortable. Am I being too uptight? More recently, I also found out that he did a similar thing leading one of his gay professors on, and that he goes to gay bars to see if men will hit on him. Is this guy a straight-up narcissist? Jake, as a hot man, would you do any of this? Would you do any of this?

Or is he acting weird? Do I talk to him and confront him or just ignore and maintain the status quo? I put this in your hands. Best, Todd Marsh. Interesting. Sorry, isn't it Stan Marsh? Stan is the kid. Randy is the dad.

Oh, I see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now we got to the question. All right, let's start from the top. Can you do it again? I do hear, I don't send gay photos, photo sorry i don't send nude photos to gay people but i do hear i feel like people have friends they're like yeah his dick's always out he's always sending me dick pics i mean we had i don't we had a joke going for a while that i think i started where i would text one of you guys as if I was texting my wife and just open the wrong thing with like a little sexy message and a picture.

And then that led to a flurry. Yeah. I wouldn't call them dick pics, but like very close. Wasn't there one where you opened a hotel door once and me and Jake were like naked? Oh, yeah. Those are two different. Oh, wait. There was the one picture that you have.

You guys were naked laying on your beds. Streeter had like, you sent like a lazy eye photo like up above your head where you could see like your whole entire butt behind you. Yeah, I like to cross my eyes with him. I thought it was funny. And then there was that other time when Streeter came to our hotel room, and we answered the door completely naked. Yeah.

And I don't remember if you did this or if we just talked about how funny it was later, but you like walked in and started pretending to take a photo of it. We talked about how the thing to do would have been to, or to just try to grab your dick, which would have been the ultimate comeback to that. It feels like there's a difference between nudity and dick stuff and then actively sending hard dick pics to one individual person who in their life would be attracted to that kind of thing. Yeah. It is a sticky pickle. I think it's weird as fuck. It's a sticky pickle. This is fucking weird. I think it's weird as fuck. It's a weird thing. Because you're like, I mean, I guess the only thing to do is make a move on the guy and see what happens. Right, see if you put his money where his mouth is.

Yeah. But doing this, it doesn't mean that he's gay. It means that he likes the attention. Yeah. The fact that he goes to the gay bars, I'm a little further down the path of thinking this guy might just be gay or bi or something. Yeah. The fact that he goes to the gay bars, that makes, that like, I'm like a little further down the path of thinking like, this guy might just be gay or bi or something. Right. Yeah. If you like gay attention so much at a certain point, are you just gay? I guess the question is, does he do this to women too? Like, is he sending his female friends just like dick pics? If he did

this to a woman, we'd be like, that's illegal. That's harassment. But when he does this- Well, that's not really what I was saying. Oh, gotcha. But to a woman would be like that's illegal that's harassment but when he does that's not really what I was saying oh gosh I know but if a woman was complaining about this would be like

this guy's a fucked up weird pervert but the fact that he's a gay guy it's like I don't know what to feel about it yeah yeah

but I think that's just contextually because this guy if this guy was like it really bothers me I hate seeing his dick then we would say it is harassment

but he's like I like seeing his dick I want that yeah he likes this guy but I'm confused about the message that it's sending me. So what can he say? What do I do?

Can you say, stop sending me dick pics? I guess you just send some dick pics back. Yeah, maybe send one back and see what happens. Yeah, that's good. That's the tit for tat thing. Just because he sends a dick pic doesn't mean you should like grab his dick and suck it you know i like yeah the version like the trying to relate to this would be a woman sending you naked photos right would that make you uncomfortable you like you like seeing her naked body but it seems very weird and makes me uncomfortable what would be a lesbian sending me them because that's the that's

the confusion like why is someone right she wouldn't be into you i know isn't interested in me oh interesting sending me signals that she would be and is it like totally to tease me and to fuck with me and if it is the case or just be a friend what's that or to just be a really good friend yeah that's interesting too so maybe someone's like hey i know you love the way my dick looks. And I'm your boy. So I'm going to send you a photo. I know you're attracted to me.

It's never going to happen. But, you know, if you want to take a peek, like, here you go. You can jerk off to this if you want. Yeah, do with it what you will. And we're closer. If a lesbian sent you photos, you wouldn't be like, stop doing that. No, I wouldn't. That is so disgusting of you.

But, like, that's not what this guy is asking to hear. I would report it to the police, the FBI, DOJ. Am I being uptight, he asks. I guess it's your body, so you can do whatever you want. It's weird to be like, you're being uptight he asks i guess it's it's your body so you can do whatever you want it's weird to be like you're being uptight uh do i talk to him and confront him about it or ignore it you can't ignore it you can ignore it well you got to write something back yeah i think i think you respond with uh with the dick pics you like keep it to sex call his bluff yeah you don't need to turn this into a whole thing. Yeah.

Yeah, I think he's maybe stressing out about it too much. Call his buff, you know what I mean? Yeah, thank you. Nice. Shlong. I saw you writing that one down a while ago. Yeah, downstairs. Yeah. Do you think this guy's actually really hot?

Is he a dime? Yeah. Is he two nickels? I mean, gay clubs. A quarter of a quarter? He mentioned that he's a hottie, right? That's true. Maybe this dude should just take the free dick pics,

I guess. That's what I think. If it's not really bothering him. Right. It just seems like it's not really upsetting him, it's more confusing him. Huh. Right. And the confusion is, like, he said he doesn't want to fuck me, but he sends me nude photos. So you know what? Maybe just take him at his word. He doesn't

want to fuck you, but he wants to send you nude photos. Could just be like an exhibitionist and he trusts you enough that he's like, look, this is how I get off. You're showing my dick to people. So you don't have to take it any steps further.

You just enjoy the free nude photos. Is it illegal to send someone a nude photo of yourself? I don't know. No idea. There's some kind of... Yeah, I mean... It's harassment yeah i mean it's like it's harassment i mean i guess it'd be unsolicited nude photo would be illegal maybe i guess it's kind of like just

whipping your dick out on the street right that's illegal yeah some stupid reason yeah like you did that and like i wasn't offended but no i know but that's not the debate you have to have. But the mayor of New York freaked out. This guy has said that he likes the dick pics. So that's not the question. Is this legal or is it bad? Yeah, I'm just thinking out loud. Yeah. Well, I don't want to wade into these fucking weedy marsh swamp disaster.

Todd Marsh. Todd Marsh. All right. It's quicksand and I'm going to get sucked down. Here's another good question. From a lady. Streeter, do you have a lady's name? Yeah, I do.

It's awesome. Jessica Ranch. Todd Marsh and Jessica Ranch. Jessica writes, My friend wants to fuck my mom. Huh? We work together in retail and my mom, who's a hottie, often comes to the store to say hi. He is 23.

She is 53. My friend saw my mom, and now he won't stop telling me how hot she is. Now my friend is a goddamn dime, more than attractive enough for approval for my mother, and I want her to have a fulfilling sex life. However, I'm not sure how to get my mom fucked by my friend without it being weird. Thanks for your help. This is interesting because she's still married to her dad. Wow. I assume it's a single mom.

It's weird that the question is like, how can I get my mom laid without it being weird and not like, what do I do about this dude? How do I stop this from happening at all costs? It seems like because it's coming from a female writer, it's less weird than a bro hooking up his mom with another bro. Right.

Because it's a daughter helping a mom get laid. It feels a little more wholesome. If the tables were turned and your dad was single, would you try to set him up with one of your friend's friends 30 years his junior? Yeah, that's the question. I guess I would. That'd be hot. My dad or yours?

Either one. I just want to blow my dad. Set up our two dads on a date? Is that crazy? Should our dad 69? Our mom and dad have already kissed each other. Right, so this is just the next evolution of that. Yeah, would you hook your mom up with a male friend?

With one of my friends? No. Okay, would you hook your mom up with a male friend? With one of my friends? No. Okay, so not even me? No. Right. Definitely not you. What if I just wanted to take your mom out for like a steak dinner? No. Okay, what if it was like a breakfast date? That's fine.

Yeah, that's fine. With your mom. It's always steak. I want to give her the beef. You know my mom likes steak. You know my mom. Thin as hell and medium rare. There's something so upsetting about, and it just hits my ear wrong, about I want my mom to have a fulfilling sex life.

Why? Don't want anything in terms of your mom's sex life. Just don't. She already made you. Yeah, she already got laid. Jake, this seems like something you'd want to do for your mother. Yeah. If you had to choose a friend of yours to set your mom up with, who would it be?

No one. Of course. Because you've got to kiss that friend goodbye after that. That's done. You can't be friends anymore. No, I guess I would not. Because he is your daddy. Yeah, I mean, he's been in the place where you came from. I would not in any way, shape, or form facilitate somebody railing my mom.

If somebody was, like, really looking for, like, a loving relationship and was going to treat my mom like the angel that she is and do away with my nasty father once the angel that she is. Yeah. Do away with my nasty father once and for all. Banish him. Then maybe I'd help. But like if it's just like a. That tyrant. It's like a fucking washboarded abs 22 year old that wants to fucking pork my mom and

never call her. Wow. Like that's not a fulfilling sex. I don't know. I don't know. I mean, if this girl's mom is that hot, right? That this dude 30 years younger than her is

creaming his jeans about it, I'm sure she has a fulfilling sex life this girl doesn't know about. Right. You know, I'm sure she's out doing just fine. It's presumptive to think that, like, your mom's not having sex and you can get her Yeah, and she needs your help. 23 seems young to like want

to set up with a mom 23 is like you know still a young yeah but if it was a 53 year old rich dude you would be like oh this is hot it's a sexy 23 year old yeah you're not very woke guys take longer to mature that would have been that would have been a good prank wars if i dated your mom oh yeah would you have seen that coming i feel like my dad would have been a good prank wars if I dated your mom. Oh, yeah. Would you have seen that coming? I feel like my dad would have been upset about it. I think that might have been a dead giveaway, right? Yeah. Did you ruin enough relationships in street or something? Would that be a good...

Actually, we wanted to talk about the prank wars, and this could be a good segue into it. Ooh, yeah. Is it time? I'm suddenly nervous. Is there something weighing on your conscience? It wasn't really weighing on my conscience, but it does feel freeing or liberating to talk about.

I do feel nervous right now. Really? I do too. I'm wondering about potential blowback. Yeah. There's a little blowback. Yeah. There's going to be some blowback, guys.

You think? I think there's going to be a lot of people out there that are... that are well i mean we don't even know what we're discussing right so why don't i i'll conduct an interview okay if we can move on from this question i feel like we helped this person out sure don't interfere uh let's conduct an interview about the prank war okay do you think everybody listening knows what they are uh let's set that up. Tell me what the prank war is. Prank war. Series of eight videos we made for College Humor where Streeter and I alternate pranking each other. And they got increasingly more vicious, I would say, and more ambitious as they went on.

Yeah, it started innocuous. Vicious and ambitious. Yeah. What do you think was the meanest one? The meanest brain war uh I think the uh audition Amir's

fake audition for a sketch show that didn't exist yeah that was bad that was the most embarrassing yeah that was

I think embarrassing yeah and uh maybe meanest was convincing the skydiving one yeah

the skydiving where you you had streeters skydiving uh instructor guy tell him that the chute didn't open, that he was going to die. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And when you thought of these ideas, what was the process of when you guys were thinking of the prank were pranks? So that's the thing. That's the big, that's the meat.

That's the thing we need to get off our chest after 10 years. Do you want to say it? How did you deliberately make me say it? What's that? I think you should say it. It's your podcast. Do you want me to say it because you feel bad, like this absolves you of any of the guilt?

I don't feel bad necessarily. I do feel like we got a free TV show off a lie. That's true. We did. Oh, a lie. Well, we, yeah. Yeah, the secret's a lie so the the the big the big secret which is i mean it's not really i mean it is a secret in that no one else knows yeah well

some people you know we told a few people like our friends knew yeah is that the the prank word videos were all fake they were not real we faked them now that's a bit of a bombshell yeah and the question is not for you because you knew so you're just as you're as guilty as we are there was lying to people i i remember still during the yankee pranky which was uh that was when you uh put on the billboard a proposal to streeter's girlfriend at the time yeah Will you marry me? That displayed during the seventh inning stretch. There's a whole thing. Streeter's like, I don't want

to marry you. She said yes. I said no. She hit me in the face. There was a bunch of videos on my computer because you guys used my computer to edit it. There's a lot of really incriminating videos where it's you filming Streeter

and then him filming. Yeah, we didn't have a very big budget for some of those early ones. Yeah, I shoot the intro of Streeter being like, all right, all right. Streeter was shooting me being like, all right, what Streeter doesn't know is blah, blah, blah. And then Streeter's like, all right, say that again,

but like do it like this. So these were all like videos that Streeter and I basically wrote together. We planned them out. And then we would execute them as if they were real. And then we would edit them together. And they were real in the sense that we had to do all the embarrassing stuff. Like I did have to get.

Stand up at like for a dead silent crowd that was booing you. Right. And then you had to put that video online. Yeah, so there was like, the skydive instructor really did make the parachute malfunction in a way that I was spinning around and almost passed out.

Duncan, my ear. And my ear did hurt. But you knew that he would do that. But I knew that I wasn't really going to die. Right. Here's the question. I mean, I like 90% knew because it's still skydiving, so there's always a chance. Yeah, of course.

Now, to me, like, I remember the first one ever where you, like, spliced in. Amir was listening to your iTunes and you spliced in audio of you having sex. So that's the thing. We started it with the idea that no one would believe it. And then we could make them more and more insane. Right. I remember that one was almost a sketch idea. It was basically a sketch.

And the idea was going to be like, we'll pretend we have this prank war going. But everyone will know it's fake. So then we can just have insane things happen to each other. But then people believed it for some reason. Which still happened. You still have insane things happen to each other. But then people believed it for some reason. Which still happened. You still had insane things happen, but the difference was that everybody...

So you were surprised when people were like... Very. People think this one's real, we should do a revenge one. And that was when I set you up on a date and stand you up. Oh, yeah, yeah. That was the craziest one to me. That was pretty funny, too. Because you had a girlfriend

at the time. Yeah, there were so many holes in this lie. And then by the time we got to the basketball shot one where I shoot a basketball shot blindfolded and you tell the whole crowd to cheer,

the whole crowd thought it was real. They all thought it was real. That was probably the most famous one. Everyone played along so well. The whole school thought it was real.

Yeah, we had to lie to the school. The school really thought they were messing with you. Right. Which was so vicious. Right. I felt kind of bad. When we left the arena, I felt like we had pulled off a bank heist because we're walking. We're like, holy shit, it's over.

It's done. We did it. Remember we had a hotel room and we just went there and edited the video immediately. Yeah. I always felt like that was the best acting i ever did in prank war and i could never i could never be like see look i'm a decent actor that's the that was the annoying part which is why it feels a little good to get off our chest like the one where i'm the human giant one where we shoot a human giant sketch

oh i'm like crying at the end i'm like this is like really realistic you go i mean i should win some kind of webby for this but everyone's like look at a end. I'm like, this is like really realistic. I mean, I should win some kind of Webby for this. But everyone's like, look in the mirror, that little bitch. She can't even stop crying. And I can't be like, well, I wasn't really crying. What about the one where you like your audition tape? Yeah, that was the one that I love. That one is so funny.

It's basically a comedy skit. Yeah, it's so obvious. Like, do they actually think I did, like, a Robin Williams impression? Yeah. Andy Bloom. Oh, there's an inside joke in Prank War that we can finally talk about. Which is what? Which is that your name is always wrong in some way.

Oh, really? People, you know, people say, like, Anil and Meyer and stuff. Was there ever a prank war that you guys were like, this is the one that's going to out us? Like, everyone's going to call this one out as fake? As fake. People are going to know. I think the skydiving one was a little... Oh, and the stand-up one.

Pete told the audience that it was fake. Everyone there knew. Everyone at UCF knew. Like, don't worry, this is a fake prank, but we're going to... Right, because people are going to feel too bad. Yeah. Actually, don't laugh. Don't worry, Streeter a fake prank, but we're going to... Right, because people are going to feel too bad. Yeah. Actually, don't laugh. Don't worry, Streeter knows about it.

Yeah. And then we're like, oh, shit, I hope these people don't tell anybody. We were really just... We were playing fast movies. Yeah. And then that guy wrote that article in the New York Times about how these are fake, and he was trying to interrogate us and grill us. Remember, we had this interview.

It was like... Oh, yeah. If these were real, would you really, like what if Amir was in the bathroom during the Maryland Fringe? Oh, right, right. Like, would you really risk the whole thing? And then you were like, yeah,

I guess I would have been fucked if you went to the bathroom. And he's like, I'm cut, I cut you. I know, that guy, I forgot about that. There's been so many times, I remember, because we went on Kimmel for two of these. I think that's when i felt the worst that's when i felt the worst because he's like a respected peer of yours because he's awesome he's

very cool nice dude but we kind of had to keep our lie going because it was like what are we gonna do yeah at that point you know we're like on tv talking about these pranks and if it came out if it came out then i feel like we would be in trouble because we both still worked for College Humor. People were watching the videos. There was ad money tied up in this lie all of a sudden. Not that we got any of it, but there was ad money involved.

When was the last skydiving lesson out of it? Was it almost seven, eight years ago? It was a long time ago. Prank War 8 came out... There's still pretty funny. Are you not going to prank Amir back? long time ago. Prank War 8 came out in 2009. Are you not going to prank Amir back? I'm still going to get Amir back eventually when his guard's down.

It'll be nice to not lie to just random people anymore. I stopped lying. People were like, so when Streeter did that thing, were you like, oh, those aren't real? And they're like, what? It's always like I punch them in the face. Why? Anybody I was honest with what? It's always like I punch them in the face. Like, why?

Anybody I was honest with got immediately mad at me. And they would be like, why did you tell me? I think they're mad because they like being on our team or your team, and they don't realize that the whole time it was kind of a prank on them. They don't want to be the butt of the team. I don't like to think of it that way. I like to think of it as... The prank war was the two sides. It was not Streeter versus Amir. It was Streeter and the butt of the team. I don't like to think of it that way. I like to think of it as... The prank war was the two sides. It was not Streeter versus the beer.

It was Streeter and Demir versus the public. Yeah. No, that's not what it was. And now it's time for them to get us back. Entertainment. Yeah, sure, entertainment. For the masses. Now you can rewatch them and you can, you know...

You can spot where it's clearly fake. Which ones are real, which ones are fake. All of them. And, I don't know. Hopefully you can, you know. You can spot where it's clearly fake. Which ones are real, which ones are fake. All of them. And I don't know. Hopefully you can watch it with a new appreciation. Wait, after basketball, what happened? Was that skydiving? Yeah.

Yeah. And then it just stopped. Yeah. I mean, the basketball one was the best prank of all time. I think so. I think that was. That was the highlight. Even knowing it was a prank, it was such an exciting moment.

Because we got an entire 20,000 person arena to cheer. It was great. Who shot that? It's shot really, really well, too. Matt Pollock, was it? Matt Pollock and Creighton. Creighton. The way they catch that.

There was a few people. Did any part of you think that there was a chance that the ball was going to go in? Yeah, I was hoping it would go in. I shot it to go in. I just missed it by a lot. You missed it by a ton. What would have happened to the... I guess it would have been even more fun. It would have been. I shot it to go in. I just missed it by a lot. You missed it by a ton. What would have happened to the... I guess it would have been even more fun.

It would have been even better, I think. Yeah. It would have been even more disappointing because then, you know, if it were real, I'd be like, you got it, but it's not actually real. You have to somehow get the cash.

Yeah. That one's fun because that, even though now we're saying that we faked it, that one has been done for real to people. Yeah, at NBA games. People were like inspired to do it. Wow, cruel. Yeah, very cruel. Who thought of that one?

I actually don't remember brainstorming that. I don't remember either. Is that your idea or mine? I don't remember. I remember coming up with most of them together, like having a starting point and working it out. It's your shot. It's your shot. It's your shot. That dude was great.

The little announcer dude? Yeah. And I think the way I missed it was very cinematic because it like floats out of frame and then lands like eight feet to the left of the basket. It's so satisfying. It's really a fun one to watch. Yeah, just watching it now. And then you run around like a total dork. Yeah. Like a real doofus. I still have

that weird Marilyn face mask. And the t-shirt that we got. The fact that you come out with the check, it was really, really good. The check? Where is the check? It was in our office for so long. You hugged the mascot. Yeah. You were like, you can't even believe

it. Down on the knees. I remember we almost cut that part because it seemed kind of fake. Yeah. That was always when we were editing because it was like, is that too fake? Does that look fake? Well, that's the thing. Before the baseball one, we could do it as much as we wanted. We can like, all right, let's reshoot that because it didn't seem real.

But with the baseball one, we were like, all right, I hope your girlfriend can slap you well because this is all we got. And then the basketball one, we definitely couldn't do it again. I mean, yeah. The basketball is the first one we had to edit overnight because we were like, people are going to tweet about it. Yeah, people were like tweeting and people had like video of it and they were putting it online and stuff. Wow, this is a great prank. It really is. Half a million.

Maybe we should edit this part out of the podcast all right i still enjoy these maybe we'll do another one yeah look how much fun we were having so young so happy you look nice dude god damn man look at that weird run and then you just fall yeah slap the floor maybe that's what we cut uh i remember remember we talked about doing one more that was, it would have been so hard to pull off, but it was fake plane crash. Oh! Where you were on it, we would charter a full plane. Wow. And have the pilot make it seem like I went to a doctor and the doctor had to like give me emergency surgery and I woke up and you would wake me up without a dick.

You would put prosthetics over my dick and I would look up and it would have no dick. And then like the walls of the office, the walls of the hospital open up and I'd be like live on stage. 2,000 people cheering the fact that I don't have a dick. You grab a scalpel and try to kill yourself. Let's shoot that one. Let's do it. Just for fun. Just cut this whole chunk out. If you're listening, don't tell anybody.

Don't tell anyone. We still want to do them. Keep a secret. CollegeHumor needs it. CollegeHumor PrankWare 7. View from the student section. See somebody. They were leaking the video. Oh my god. That has a lot needs it. CollegeHumor Prank War 7, view from the student section. See somebody, they were leaking the video. Oh my god. That has a lot of views. I know. This has more views than the actual prank. They monetized it.

This guy's a millionaire off my fucking video. But it like, we hosted a clip show on MTV for what, five seasons? Yeah. Based on our, you know on our reputation as pranksters. Well, maybe now it'll get a reboot since you guys have revealed that you've pranked the masses.

We kind of became prank experts without ever actually having to prank each other. Yeah, like, have you ever been actually pranked? Or have you ever actually pranked someone? Yeah, but not at that level. No, yeah. I mean, even though the pranks are fake, like, you still brainstormed real pranks.

You guys are experts. Yeah, we were just too scared to pull them off for real. Doing these things was embarrassing as it were. You know, even though it was like I knew what was going on. Right. Super embarrassing and tense. Yes. Especially the ones that we can only shoot once in front of like 20,000 people that we hope play along.

Or just, again, like almost passing out in the sky. Yeah. That was, I would not have done that. I would not be like, yeah, and then I'll skydive and we'll just fuck with me. It'll like go around in a loop-de-loop and the guy will try to fuck with me. God, that was so scary. Yeah, so scary. All right.

All right, well, great. It's nice to get that off our chest. Same. I have big regrets about talking about it now already we haven't even released it yet I know and I don't think we should well we'll talk about it if you're listening to it you know which way we decided let's take a break

we'll come back and we'll try to answer one more question with Streeter thank you to Squarespace for sponsoring this episode of our show hell yeah Jake you've been building on Squarespace for decades at this point. Exactly. Eons, it feels like. Yes.

So you know how easy it is to use their simple, intuitive, drag and drop design technology? Yes, yes, yes. Easy to create, easy to sell, easy to promote. Squarespace is my all-in-one, first stop, one-stop shop. Yeah. is my all-in-one first stop, one-stop shop. Yeah, it's kind of funny that they have also award-winning customer support because it's so intuitive that even Jake was able to figure it out.

But if you have any questions, they can figure it out for you as well. Exactly. And I did need a lot of help. I needed a lot of help. It's easy for everybody, but I still like to have my hand held. They even have AI at this point.

You can update written content, product description, or email with Squarespace AI. You can even buy a domain name through Squarespace. Exactly. Like, you know that movie Freaky Friday? Yeah. How'd you like to own FreakyFriday.com? That'd be great. Is that available? It's not available. Yeah. But how'd you like to own Freaky Tuesday? Interesting. Freaky Tuesday. So that's when you run into each other and some parts of your personality change, but ultimately it's not a full body swap. Interesting. Freaky Tuesday. So that's when you run into each other and some parts of your personality change, but ultimately it's not a full body swap. Right. Mostly you're just concussed. Yeah. Which is new. It's kind of like having a new personality.

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And we're back. How was SNL this year? It was great. Who was your favorite host? Oh, man. You can't say because it's favoritism. Yeah, maybe. Let me ask you a different question. Yeah.

Did you like The Rock? What was it like to hang out with The Rock? I love The Rock. He was awesome. Do you call him The Rock? No. Do you call him Rocky? I call him Mr. Johnson.

Really? Very cool. And he's coming to your office and just talking to you? Call him President Johnson. He's very chill. He's cool. Is he charismatic? Yeah, extremely.

And does it seem fake at all? No. He wants to know the name of everybody. Even if it is fake, it's so good that I don't care. Hopefully that's the reaction. That's the pull quote. So good. Even if it is fake, it's so good I don't care. Yeah, do you have a fun rock story or, like, just a small anecdote?

I don't have a fun, I have a fun Az story or just a small anecdote? I don't have a fun... I have a fun Aziz story. Okay, go ahead. Hopefully he's cool with me talking about this. We did a sketch. Mikey and I wrote a sketch with him where he played a Chuck E. Cheese band member. Oh, yeah, the animatronic band? Yeah, so he's a singer in the animatronic band.

His name was Peppy Ronnie. And he sang annoying songs about pizza okay and oh like pepperoni yeah yeah and he sent me like i want to say 75 audio messages of him singing pizza songs in the voice like don't you want some pizza and they were coming in so fast like they were coming in one every 45 seconds for like an hour or like an hour and then more the next day after the sketch aired too yeah i think he sent me some next week it was really funny that's fun i don't know if he wanted to put him in or if he was just doing it to make me laugh. Does The Rock know your name? What's it like? Does he call you Mr. Seidel? I don't think he knows my name. Maybe he remembered it just for the week. Oh, that's awesome though. I don't think he'll remember if I saw him right

now. He's a big guy though, right? He's a big, strong guy. Yeah. Let him know how much you like big, strong, macho man. You think he could put both of your hands around his arm? Or too big? I don't think so. Too big, right? I'm being serious. I don't think I could put both of your hands around his arm? Or too big? I don't think so. Too big, right? I'm being serious. I don't think I could. Yeah. That's awesome.

He's so big. I love The Rock. How do you feel about Cena? Because we had Cena this year, too. Who? John Cena. I don't know. You don't know who that is.

More about the people's champion. You don't know who John Cena is? If you smell! It doesn't matter who John Cena is! Do you guys watch wrestling or you just watch? No, I'm just a huge fan of the Tooth Fairy. What did he do wrestling? He did wrestling?

What? The Rock was in the Tooth Fairy? The Rock was the Tooth Fairy! I don't remember this at all. That's the presidential oppo research. Watching the Tooth Fairy. Nobody's watched it. All right, that's a good story. And you're still there?

You just finished your third year? Yeah. And now next year will be your fourth. Hopefully. Holy shit. Yeah, hopefully. David S. Pumpkins, man. Part two.

Changed your life. That's on the first line of your obituary, right? David S. Pumpkins changed my life. Was Pumpkins also fake? Not even a guy that wrote it. Pumpkins changed my life. Was Pumpkins also fake? Not even a guy that wrote it. Pumpkins was also fake. I hate to say it. They're really... Fuck! Yeah, it's not a real guy. It was Tom Hanks.

Fuck! The actor. Yeah. Oh my god, we're gonna be buried alive for that. Anything else you wanted to talk about before we get back into it? No, just having fun hanging out with you guys. Finally. Finally.

It's been since New Zealand, man. I know. Oh, yeah. Did we even talk about that? I had the worst day, by the way, because I left like two days before you guys, or three days. Yeah.

I had a travel day that was 26 hours by myself, straight through, not talking to anyone, so lonely. It was a red eye from Sydney to LA, and then like a five-hour layover, and then a five-hour flight. A five-hour layover where I was falling asleep in the airport, and then a flight from LA to New York, just all by myself, no one to talk to. Oh, God. How many movies did you watch?

I watched like nine movies, I want to say. Back to back to back to back. But I did take a shower at the airport, which is great. How great is that? It's great. You get a private toilet, too. Did you jerk off in the shower? I did not, because I was so tired.

You've got to jerk off in the private shower. I feel like I don't want to, because I don't want other people to do that. So you jerked off on the airplane? You're jerking off in the airport. Every time. All right, now I can't. I don't want to use them. What about the airplane? Have're jerking off in the airport. All right, now I can't use them. What about the airplane?

Have you joined the Half Mile High Club? Obviously. Yeah, obviously. Because we talked about, remember our invention, airplane arm? A fake arm. Jerk off on a plane. Jerk off on a plane. You don't need the fake arm.

You could probably just do it somehow. Do you want to hear a crazy thing? Sure. This is a true crazy thing. Okay. I went to Florida with my wife and child, and on the flight home, there was a couple sitting across the aisle from us, and they were straight up having sex. No.

On the plane, they got in trouble for it. Like a blanket over both of them, and she was on his lap? Yeah. And then we kind of looked over, and we saw that her shorts were around her ankles. Oh my god. And they got like a weird, like a plane citation. You know, like they came out with a thing and they were like, we are warning you.

A day flight or a night flight? It was a day flight from Miami to New York. So it was brightly lit. It was not like an overnight everyone's asleep anyway type deal. I guess it was like dusk maybe. We were delayed a while. These people were insane. They spilled like four drinks they were wasted they were wasted on coke going hitting a vape in the bathroom together they got they got in trouble for being in the bathroom together they were eating candy like eating so much candy and she was gorgeous she was like a six foot tall model. She was like Chrissy Teigen.

And then the dude looked like a weird DJ type looking dude. You know, like super skinny and kind of balding. Yeah, was it a rich Avicii man? I didn't recognize him. It might have been Moby if he was balding. It was probably Chrissy Teigen and Moby. No, there was animal products in some of that candy. So you saw them fucking?

Yeah, but they were only fucking for a minute, and then people were like, and the flight attendant had to come over and be like, you need to get back in your seat. Really? It's so weird. At that point, you were just like a kindergarten teacher. No, you cannot do that. They asked my wife, like the flight attendants asked Vanessa

if she wanted to press charges because we had a baby with us. Wow. And they were like, if you want to press charges, they can be arrested when we get off. And she was like, I mean, no, not really. Wow. I don't want to get involved in this. I'm good. What if you could have gotten 50 grand for that? Well, I don't know if they would have to

pay us. For emotional trauma? Maybe, yeah. I'm sure a baby student would have to go through some I mean, they definitely had money. They definitely had money. Yeah. Vicks are not cheap. And that much candy at Hudson News with a markup? You're either really rich or really poor if you reach that level of, I don't give a fuck.

What was crazy is we were in first class because I had like a companion ticket, so I cheaped out. But I was like, wow, the shit they let you get away with in first class is insane wow because they got in trouble but like didn't get arrested they were able to like leave the plane and just go into the world i wonder how they told this story like yeah we fucked on the way down i don't think they remember it i mean they were making out so hard from the second they

got on the on the flight we knew it was gonna be a fun one. That's so fucking weird. So fucking hot. Alright, let's try to answer one last question. Okay. This is a male in Kansas City.

Tommy Socks. I think I'm starting to understand your technique here. I look around the room. Long time listener, customer, investor, and most importantly friend. Fuck, wrong show.

I'm a 24 year old male who recently got catfished in Kansas City. It's not a traditional catfish in the sense that it's a completely different person behind the smoke show profile, so let me explain. I was browsing Bumble, right? And I happened to match with a smoke show It's not a traditional catfish in the sense that it's a completely different person behind the Smoke Show profile. So let me explain. I was browsing Bumble, right? And I happened to match with a Smoke Show, no bio, which was a little suspect at first.

But half of the users don't even start a conversation. Not even a day later, she sends me a message and we start a good conversation and things are going well. I don't overplay my hand and she asks for my number. At this point, things are looking really good. I wait a week before asking her out and we plan on getting drinks. And this is where it all goes down. I arrive to my surprise. I wasn't looking at the girl in the pictures at all.

Not to be an asshole, but she was thick, like really thick. 100 pounds thicker than her profile pictures. This is where it gets complicated because I did enjoy our conversations asshole, but she was thick, like really thick, 100 pounds thicker than her profile pictures. This is where it gets complicated, because I did enjoy our conversations, and she is genuinely a chill person. I was turned off by the fact that she lied, and even though it's a bit petty, I'm not attracted to her at all. So my question is, how do I break it to her that I'm not interested in a relationship without sounding like an asshole?

Then, how do I ask her to be friends? Because she is chill and has hot friends herself. Oh, you can't have both ways. What would you do? What would you do? I like that I called that being catfished. Fatfished. Nice! I should leave right now.

Save it. Pitch that to MTV tomorrow. Why would I go to MTV? They're never going to work with you again after this prank or shit. Would you say something if you met up with a girl and she's not her? Would you be like, this isn't you? Or would you have a weird date and just be forever? It's not like it was a completely different person. It was like she used old photos before she had gained weight.

Right. Or it was just a different, heavier human. If it was a different person, would you say something? Yes, if it's a different person. But if they gained, that's the difference. Right. Or it was just a different, heavier human. If it was a different person, would you say something? Yes, if it's a different person, but if they gained, that's the difference. Yeah. This person is the person in the photos they just gained weight, which makes them a different person. Jesus Christ.

I feel like I wouldn't even have the courage to, like, call that person out. If they were a completely different person. Yeah, I'd be like, uh, hey, let's get a drink. Get a drink and leave. I wouldn't be like, this isn't you. This isn't you. I'm not sitting here. Hey, you're fat. Hey, what the heck?

She's like, yeah, it is me. I just gained weight. I don't want to have that conversation. This person obviously could tell that it was her and she'd gained weight, so you don't say anything then, but if it's like a different human, what would you do? A completely different person, I would say something. Yeah, I feel like you have to. What would you would you say i would say what the fuck is going on i might just i might just roll out of there and not even engage so she's like hey say this is me i'm

laura and i would be like can i ask you a question is that you in the pic like uh-huh no it's not is it not look at yeah but then he was so attracted to her chatting that he doesn't know what to do. I think, you know, like, the right thing to say is, like, well, if she's such a great person, whatever. Why did she do this? You know, like, if she's so great, then if you like her that much as a person, then you can overcome that. But probably not. No. You have to be attracted to the people you're dating.

You know, you have, that's like level one. This is the attraction of the person. Am I attracted to this person? Yes, cool. Yeah, but I think at this point he's like,

can I just be friends with her? Of course. That is the best course of action. Yeah, yeah, sure. If she's cool, but you're not physically attracted to her and you want to be her friend,

then that's the answer. So how do I break it to her that I'm not interested? It's kind of, this dude's a little scummy that he's like, and she has hot friends her friend, then that's the answer. So how do I break it to her that I'm not interested? It's kind of, this dude's a little scummy that he's like, and she has hot friends. Yeah, yeah, chill on that. If he left out that one line, it'd be like, oh, okay, this is the right thing to do. But it's like, do you want to be friends with her because you like her? Because you want to get with her friends?

Yeah, chill on the friends. I'm not saying it can't happen, but let's just not make that the MO from the get-go. Yeah, let's not make that the goal and the target. We sometimes talk about dating app ideas. What about one where you choose a photo of anything you want? So everybody's catfishing everyone. The bio is real, the conversations are real, but the photos are not. Oh, you have an avatar that's just a hot person.

That's right. I like that. That's an interesting idea. So you just choose a stock photo of a hot guy or girl. So everyone is just sort of hot. Base level, assume that the person that they're talking to is really hot. And you actually get to know their personality. I do think that would be full of all ugly people.

That's right. Of course. Because hot people don't need to use the fake. Right. Like you and I would be on that. Jake would be on a real one. Don't you know? No.

I think that people that are hot that usually get the benefit of the doubt just based on how hot they are might enjoy an app where they're like, hey, someone's going to get to know me for me. That's right. Not because I look like Leonardo. A troll shows up and they're going to be like, oh, I'm not going to get with this. You know what would be cool? The more messages you exchange, like you unlock different little pixels on the photo. Yeah, that's real good. When you get to a thousand messages exchanged,

that's when the photo reveals itself. So you're fucking invested. So it's like really pixelated and then the picture becomes clearer and clearer. I love the more you message. I'd like to invest. Alright, we're in. A hundred dollars. Yeah. What's that artist where you can't really tell what it is until you're far away?

Monet. That's right. We'll call it Time is Monet. Because the more time you spend with someone. Why don't we just call it Monet? George Seurat maybe does that too, right? Seurat was an early adapter for pointillism, which was kind of- Early adapter?

I thought he was like fucking invented. An art nouveau. It swept Renaissance post. Did he do shit in Photoshop? He didn't have Photoshop because he was born in 1712, but what he did was a lot of oil. When did Photoshop get invented? 88. 1788?

No, it was 1988. By Adobe? George Adobe? Yeah, what was 1988. By Adobe? George Adobe? Yeah, what was Photoshop 1.0 like? Anyway, so you can say, I don't want to hang out with you. I'm not interested, but maybe we can be friends. That's not an hassle. That might be a problem for her, though, you know?

She might be like, well. Sure, she didn't have to be your friend. Yeah, that's true. I guess put the ball in her court. Yeah, you're just here for friends alright that's fair that's safe and then once you're

really good friends you know hit her with it be like you fucking lied to me you were fat why did you put up these hot pics

you're so fat you know and really make her feel bad have a nice meaningful friendship and then you can destroy it you unload yeah

Streeter any things to shout out before you go? White wine? I don't, I mean, I think it's still online somewhere. Talk about all our old projects. Yeah, I mean, I guess... Was white wine fake? White wine was not fake.

All right, good. SNL, do you want people to watch it? I'd love for people to watch SNL there's a show called Saturday Night Live that Streeter rates for it's on 11.30pm

Saturday night on ABC on NBC the peacock baby that's cool how long has that show been on 43

43 yeah I was gonna say it's been on for a minute but it's just starting to get good now it's hitting it's drive they finally figured out

like a lot of the characters. Yeah, yeah. We cracked it. Cool. Thanks for coming by. Thanks for making time. Thanks for having me. Again, we need your theme songs, ifireyoushow at gmail.com.

For theme songs, questions, prank war was fake. We'll be back next week. Oh, we're going to Montreal. We should say that we're going to Montreal. Are you going to Montreal? I'm not. No no I wasn't invited you guys didn't invite me time didn't work out

so Montreal July 25th is our If I Were You show and then a HeadGum showcase Twinnovation and Gabrus will be there remember Gabrus yeah man

I love Gabrus yeah that show will be on July 26th you should just come up take a train yeah maybe I will. I'd love to have been invited, but...

It is the timing. The timing didn't quite work out. The timing didn't click. Cool. We'll see you guys there. We'll see you in cyberspace. Peace in the Middle East. If you're listening for the first time,

hey, we got a lot of funny episodes for you. So check them all out, starting with episode 11. All of them? All of them, from scratch. Alright, cool. See you next week. Later. That was a HateGum Podcast.