Segments - 427: Quarantine Chat

Episode Date: March 23, 2020

We are back with our microphones discussing the pros and cons of self-isolation, and our new schedule. Then we talk to a real-life doctor and ask her every question we have about COVID-19 (and phone sex, of course!)For more IF I WERE YOU check out Patreon.com/JASee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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you bundle. Hello, if you're listening to this podcast before September 27th, 2024, we're doing a live show in Philadelphia. You can still buy tickets at HeadGum.com slash live. Hope to see you there. Nice. Try one more where it's clear that I'm like the star. There's a reason I didn't have you say anything. Yeah. Because you're nervous, you're skittish, you're stuttering right now. I'm a little frightened. So I don't want you in this ad at all. I don't want to be steamrolled, but I want the live light. So no, I won't be recording one. In fact, for you asking that, I'm going to keep this part in. Don't. This part is now. Edit this part out, but let's do one clean ad. you will edit this part out you will absolutely edit this part out tell you what

i'm going to say my fucking social security number so you have to edit it out okay let's hear it oh nine one three six six two yeah now you have to edit it in but Keeping it in. But we'll see you guys there. No, no, no, no, no. No. I am a schmear, pen, pooper, Truman Geld, and I approve this message. All the dirties. Jake cares. Jake brings I'll take one last brown trophy for my ass Always, I know, I'll be second best at this show Watching, waiting, mom, I'm commiserating Say it ain't so, if I were you, show

The golden mic is ready for me to carry home You can't just say nah You gotta tell me why I didn't get it You gotta tell me why I've been getting turdies this whole time You can't just, it's arbitrary My name is Josh Valerie Herman Tips and I am straight chuffed to receive the golden mic for that sick lick

of a post chorus hell of a cover this guy doesn't give a shit about anything really who does? this guy This guy doesn't give a shit about anything, really. Who does? This guy, Jordan Holmes, writes in from Canada, does not mention coronavirus at all. He's just happy of himself. It had to have been before the virus.

No, this was sent yesterday. Pre-virus recording. Wow. Yeah. Canada is a different, it's a different world brother and uh we're living in a different world than we were last week but thank you to jordan holmes for writing in that theme song indeed so just a week ago we did the the first post coronavirus episode where i called you audio was a little muffled because we didn't really know how to record since then we've

upgraded to by the way i I knew how to record. I knew how to do it. Yeah. I record remote all the time. Okay, so that's actually going to be a turdy on your ass. I hate to... I had to do it so early in the corona days when we should all be banding together

and looking out for one another. But you're going to get a turdy for lumping me in with you there. Anywho, let's try to stay positive because it's all we got. Yeah, this episode hopefully sounds better. I got a microphone. We're using Zencaster to figure out remote recording for me from my house without having to go into the office.

Correct. And you're doing great so far. How has your week been since, like the first few days were, there was so much uncertainty. We just didn't know what the hell would happen. Now, a little more clarity. It might not be good news or bad news,

but at least we have a little more clarity as to what situation we're in. Yeah, it's interesting that I don't feel more clarity. If anything, it feels more serious. I'm like, it feels a little more dire, but it doesn't feel any more clear to me. Oh, interesting. Yeah. For me, the first few days were like, oh my god, this is a disaster. We're heading towards this iceberg, and I don't know what it means, what the data will show, if quarantining will help, how much it'll help. And now it's been a week of staying indoors. And I guess the initial shock has worn off. And now I'm just sort of hunkered down like a crazy

person in a closet with a rifle waiting for the bad part to come. Right. I guess that doesn't't feel does that feel like clarity to you it feels like i guess maybe in its own weird way but i feel like there's new things that were unclear about yeah there are definitely new things but the i guess the landscape is a little it went you know when like porn used to old photo photos used to like show you a blurry version and then the resolution would get sharper and sharper. So I feel like the porn that we're seeing is the scary future, and that vision is getting sharper and sharper. So you're starting to be able to get off to it.

Yeah, so I'm reading all the data about what situation is happening all around the world, and I'm trying to nut to it. But isn't all of the data that we're learning and all of the expert opinions and stuff, it's like mostly they're guesses. It's like, this is worst case, this is best case. We don't entirely know what we're headed for. Yeah, it's a lot of wait and see. And a lot of the things that we're waiting and seeing on is happening right now. And there's always a little delay.

It takes a few days to get sick once you have it. So all these quarantines that have happened in the last seven days, we won't know the results until next week. And we'll see how many people are in the hospital today versus a week from today. Right. But until then, we're self-isolating and self-quarantining. I assume you are too. Yeah, yeah. I'm self-isolating and self-quarantining. I assume you are too. Yeah, yeah. I'm self-isolating.

I am social distancing. I am sitting in my apartment and I'm slowly losing my mind or quickly losing my mind. Or I'm sort of like losing my mind and then recovering it multiple times a day. The highs and lows. Yeah, I think it's definitely the highs and lows. And sometimes I'm like, oh, I mean, I'm never like, this is good. But sometimes I'm like, all right, I think this is what I need. I need a regimen. I need a schedule. I need to be a little more zen.

I need to do yoga. I need to do this. And then sometimes I'm just like laying on the couch, refreshing Twitter, being like, this is despicable. This is so bad. How will it ever get better? You know? Yeah. Has your schedule been like that of a crazy person? Like, are you waking up in the middle of the night? Are you going to bed super late? Are you like, mostly the same, midnight to 8am? It's definitely not the same. One thing I stopped doing, which I think was a little bit helpful to me, was setting an alarm in the morning. I'm waking up between 8 and 10.

And I'm just not going to... The world sucks too much for me to be tired or in a bad mood. So I just wake up naturally and then ease into my day. That's a good tip even for the future. Yeah. And I've been doing things it's like that I should have been doing all along, like the, my like morning stretches and recovery exercises for my foot. I used to sort of rush through them if I had to get into the office or bring Jill to the ferry or something. And now I just wake up when I wake up and then I do my foot exercises.

Yeah. So it's, my day starts off good every morning. That's nice. And then it, then it goes downhill. How's your sleep qualities? Would you say it's roughly the same? Yeah, I think it is roughly the same. That's nice. Maybe if anything anything it's a little harder to fall asleep because i don't do as much during the day yeah but uh i haven't had a ton of trouble falling asleep honestly have you uh i haven't had trouble falling asleep my issue is when i wake up at like you know you the pre-wake up when it's like 6 58 and you check your clock and you just go back to bed because you can i've been like oh 6 oh, 6.58. Let's see what's going on. Oh, my God. Oh, God, a senator has it. Oh, shit. Look at the death toll in Italy. All right, it's 7.15. I'm awake. I'll just wake up. Yeah. And I mean, the problem with that is that

you're not only just waking up slightly before you're ready, you waking up and and sort of being alert to the bad news yeah you're there's no uh keeping the phone in the other room and having an hour to myself every morning it's more like the bad news rips me out of bed yeah that's what you want my collar throws me on the floor and starts yelling stats that's your fix you You start mainlining shitty Twitter as soon as you wake up. I find myself almost addicted, craving the information, the facts, the stories. But as I send it to friends, some of them give me pushback, like, don't send me this shit. I don't want to know this shit. I want to stay off of it, get a day or two or even an hour or two away. Are you more like, don't tell me this stuff,

ignorance is bliss? Are you more like me where it's like, it makes me feel more comfortable in a way to know all this stuff? It definitely doesn't make me feel more comfortable to know it. But I'm also not like, hey, don't tell me anything. I don't need to know I'm trying to be happy while I'm quarantined. I'm sort of like, I know that like learning about it is like kind of useful, helpful, but also it definitely depresses me. There's also those like not really anything that I can personally do. So also like to an extent, I'm just like, you know what? I don't need to look at this chart of everyone that has it in America right now. What good is that doing to all Hurwitz here? Especially because you're in the epicenter. Yeah.

I mean, that has been, that's, it's been tough. Like, I don't know. It's, there's, everybody has this kind of like shelter in place. Right. But like, I keep on fantasizing about just having a slightly bigger place and I have a nice apartment. Yeah. But I, I certainly wish I, right now, I would not mind being in my house in LA. Right, a backyard that you could just sort of walk outside to and feel safe, but still outdoors. Yeah. I mean, like, couldn't you theoretically too, just like, you could go to Griffith Park and go on a hike, couldn't you? Yeah, except that's a big problem now in LA. They've removed every type of recreational activity. So like, you're not supposed to go to the mall, you're not supposed to go to a movie theater, I'm not supposed to

play basketball. So now every hiking trail is like overcrowded. And now it's getting to the point where they might have to shut those down. Because, you know, it's hard to be six feet apart when 5 million people are on the same hiking trail. I mean, that's what the parks look like in New York. And then I just like, I see my friends that still live in Connecticut, just like hiking at Sleeping Giant. Like, oh, wow. Yeah, they can still do that. A lot of people are leaving the city.

Yeah, I actually, I'm leaving the city next week. Oh, really? For the foreseeable future? I guess indefinitely, but probably not that long. I got a place upstate. Whoa, Airbnb yeah that's cool yeah do you have a an end date are you like uh yeah just keep it open for me run the tab there so the the person whose house it is i contacted so many people on airbnb because like some people are staying in their houses some people are um not allowing people from new york city to stay in their houses of course uh some people are you know like they had somebody

in there yesterday and i'm like i don't want to stay there either uh so i contacted a whole bunch of places and this this person is like basically hasn't opened the rest for like the next two months. So I'm going to, if, if it's like good for Jill and I just keep on extending. Wow. And just have your own, I mean, you don't have a dog, you don't have a baby. You can go anywhere. Yeah. I'm, I'm very much looking forward to getting out of the city. It's funny. Cause like, I think through this process, I've realized that like, nature and the suburbs and space is in my DNA and New York City is in Jill's DNA. Like, the idea of leaving the city is very comforting to me and scary for her.

And vice versa. Yeah. When things are going to shit, she's like, all right, we have to like hunker down in New York City. That's not my instinct. Yeah. In theory, you want to be around millions of people. Yeah. I mean, I guess. It's just funny.

But that's why we're taking a sabbatical upstate. And if it works, we'll stay. Forever. Forever. So, yeah, we'll never come back are you happy that you is there any place that you would rather be as like aside from your house or do you feel comfortable and safe there no i feel comfortable this is like a good mix of suburbs and city so like i have my own space and then i can also walk to a supermarket if necessary that's

great um remember last week when i was talking to you and marty and we're like all right let's all and then I can also walk to a supermarket if necessary. That's great. Remember last week when I was talking to you and Marty and we're like, all right, let's all guess when we'll be back in the office like normal again. And Marty said one week or two weeks, one week from now. That was very hopeful. What did I say? April 15th, I think. That's starting to look unlikely.

And I said August 1st. Wow. I guess I definitely don't, I still don't think it's going to be August and i said august 1st wow i guess i i definitely don't i don't think i still don't think it's going to be august 1st you think before you you mean back to the office or back to normal uh people working in offices again i think that'll i think it'll happen in may that's nice it's nice to imagine isn't it yeah i mean we're already sort of receding back to a slightly more normal life i I don't know if, at the very least, quarantining feels less uncertain and daunting to me. I'm like, oh, now I have a new quarantine routine instead of a going to work routine. I don't think I have that yet.

What is your quarantining routine? I'm just less... It sounds like, I i mean you wake up in new fresh horror twitter yeah i wake up in a black hole but then i can go for a walk yeah do you have any outdoor time uh yeah i i go on a bike ride every day oh that's good yeah that's helpful my routine is basically a rotation of walk social media and now I got a new Nintendo Switch. So you're gaming? I'm officially a gamer now.

Are you playing new games or you're playing your old games that you used to play? I'm playing, as of now, old games and then new versions of old games. So I'll play Tecmo Bowl, which is a football game on Nintendo, in my bed, and it's sort of zen because I'm not on my phone. I'm playing an old football game on nintendo in my bed and it's sort of zen because i'm not on my phone i'm playing an old football game that's nice then i'll play tetris 99 which is a game you know tetris we've all played before but it throws you in a room with 98 other people all playing tetris against each other and as people get eliminated you move up so you look you know you're trying to get into like the top 20 and then as soon as that ends it just throws you in another room there's so many people playing tetris 99 that's cool and then

yesterday i signed online and bobby lamb you know shout out to bobby our old dp from lonely and horny when people could hang out together bobbins he was on his nintendo switch so i was playing like old nintendo games against him oh that's cool it's it's nice to yeah it's nice to see a familiar face that i went i had i had a booked social calendar yesterday yeah with zoom parties like i had two birthday parties and then jill's friends just like got together for like a drink around 9 30 that's definitely happening happening now like there's there's a new world order happening and zoom parties are starting to lead the lead the trail lead the zoom is taking i didn't realize like i was in the amanda ferry zoom party and there was like 30 people in there all video chatting it

worked relatively well oh you're i was there yeah i was there from like maybe 9 to 10 east coast time oh yeah wait that's what oh i guess actually i left just before nine i had another party to get to it's kind of it's sad of course because everyone is at home fearing death but it's also kind of like you know there you can see that there are some advantages to a regular party you don't have to get dressed you don't have to shower you don't have to travel you can drink in the comfort of your own home if you want. Yeah, it's true. It's really, it's kind of grim, but that's like a perfectly acceptable future, isn't it? Yeah, it's a little dystopian, but at the same time, once we can all hang out with each other again in 18 months, once the

vaccine has arrived, maybe a Zoom party is not a bad idea everyone yeah it is kind of fun if the only thing you you that i think that it needs is like the ability to like uh to like separate into some one-on-one convos well there is a there's private dming features right but that i you know like in the old chat rooms how you would like you'd be in the public chat and then you'd like some you could like go private with someone. Yeah. If you need it to cyber. Yeah.

Yeah. That's basically what I want zoom to be. I want to be able to be at like a 30 person zoom party. And then like, you can like click on somebody, they could click on you and it's, it's almost like Tinder. Right.

So then you can, you've been right swiped to someone uh to go chat privately with them oh that's cool and you don't have to do like mutual masturbation but you could if you wanted to and they wanted to yeah i noticed when i arrived to the uh zoom party everyone was still reeling from your suggestion that everyone starts mutually masturbating i said if everyone wanted to yeah but nobody announced that i had want yeah right exactly unfortunately i'm gonna try playing poker tonight against my friends virtually as well so like apps are starting to develop or maybe they've already been here but now that's like this is their time to shine where anything you would have done in the real world can be digitized and put online

yeah which i think is good for humanity and we need it right now but it is like there's there's a hint of sadness to all of it for me yeah it's a black mirror episode yeah the fact that we're doing all this like, oh, you can do this on Instagram Live. And you know what? People should follow HeadGum on Instagram because we're doing cool shit like that. You baked a loaf of banana bread while I read you the recipe. That's right. You and I went live together.

You gave me the recipe. I made the banana bread. It was delicious, by the way. Thank you. It was great. So we're doing cool stuff like that. But there's just like a tiny little hole in my heart for like, you know, this stuff has to exist because like all of the joy of our old life has been taken away. That's and this is again week one yeah but it's so it's necessary and good

but it's born of bad news um yeah have you been that's all i know you're not one to like drink by yourself but have you been drunk since the apocalypse uh yeah i guess so i'm trying to think yeah i in the zoom party people were like drinking and, you know, hanging out. And I'm like, I don't want to drink by myself. That's not me. Yeah, I don't think I know some people that have like, basically been like getting trashed. And I don't have any interest in doing that. But I think that like having having a beer at the end of the day is a really nice feeling. Yeah. It's helped. Yeah.

But I wonder if people like, would you say you've led a healthier life since the quarantine or a less healthy life? Definitely healthier. Isn't that interesting? Would you say you led a less healthier or healthier? Maybe slightly healthier, especially in terms of like cooking at home, like a much more efficient where I'm like waking up making breakfast occasionally making lunch making dinner of course i say making with a grain of salt because

some of it is just frozen dinners but i'm definitely not like ordering fucking chipotle post-mated yeah i think that's i mean all of our food has been home cooked and like really delicious. Good, good food. Yeah. I'm definitely saving money. Yeah. Definitely saving money. Of course the, like society's on the brink of collapse and like we might not have any money, et cetera, et cetera.

Yeah. But yeah, saving in terms of just like, yeah, what I usually spend on like a delivery fee. Right. I'm not doing that. That's nice.

Although I am, I'm not, I don't find myself, even though with all I have, like all this free time, I'm not consumed with being productive. I find it hard to like, not that I'm trying to, but like, I don't think I, right now I could hunker down and write a screenplay. Yeah. I think that's, this is one of the things I've been struggling with. Because like, it feels like there's almost like a pressure on creative people in general to like, don't slow down, like keep up with your output. There's all these different avenues that are open to you now.

But I'm like, I don't have very much motivation because I'm a little sad. I'm mourning the world as we knew it before this. Yeah. And thankfully, I haven't even had any tragedies in my life like anybody that I know having corona or being sick from it i mean it's sad how many people are struggling and dying and stuff um but like it hasn't directly affected me aside from just like i can't live my life like i used to yeah but still it makes it makes it so i'm not like eager to work on that screenplay I've never had the time for. I've got the time and not the heart.

I'm not carefree enough to create a ton of content yet. Yeah, but I've been thinking about writing out a schedule and trying to be as intentional as I possibly can about like my mood. I'm not, I don't know exactly how to fix it, but waiting for it to get better is, is not really effective. I'm my like attention span is warped to the point where like I tried reading a

book, not even a novel, but like short stories, George Saunders, short stories that Avital was reading. I'm like, every four sentences, I'm thinking about coronavirus. Like I'm not taking any of this in. Have you, you're exercising, right?

Only the walks. I'm not like sprinting or doing pushups and stuff. I think that like physical exertion has definitely helped me a little bit. I mean, even doing something like yoga, where you're like in a minute-long plank or something, that makes it so you can't really think about coronavirus. That's nice. Yeah, and the video games help, but of course that's not physical. Yeah. You could get those.

There's something called a ring fit, isn't there? It's like a video game fitness thing. Yeah, Jeff was saying that there's like some video game way of staying active as well yeah i think caldwell's been using his um all right why don't we take a break and maybe even answer some questions remember that sure shit i hope i hope i remember how yeah let's thank some sponsors and we'll be back right after these thank you to draft kings for sponsoring this episode of our show. Hey-o, DraftKings. The NFL is back. That's correct.

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And we're back. Amir, do you remember when you and Ben said that I didn't know a doctor named Presley? Yeah. Well, guess who's on the phone? We've got Dr. Presley. Hey, Jake. Hey, Doc. Oh, my God.

That's right. Proof that I know a doctor. And you, since, Amir, you're having more of a public freakout than I am. I thought it might be helpful for you to talk to Dr. Presley about some of your concerns. Yeah. Is it okay if I ask you some questions, Dr. Presley? I'm not sure what your public freakout has been, but what are you scared of? A loved one of mine getting sick. Yeah. Two, so many people needing ventilators and New York City not having enough. And then every hospitalization case after that tipping point becoming a catastrophe. I would say that I'm scared of those two things too. Do you work in an ER?

Do you know exactly how crowded things are getting over there? So I work in a children's hospital. And when I work in an ER, it's a children's specific ER. So I can't speak to how crowded the adult hospitals are, but I know it's pretty overwhelming to be an adult doctor right now. We're gonna need those beds, Presley.

Yeah, we are. Send the kids home. They actually are taking up a lot of the space in the children's hospital and turning them into adult ICU beds. Yeah. Are the beds themselves smaller? Is that the difference?

No. They have some cribs, but otherwise they're the same as hospital beds. We're going to need the cribs. We're going to need the cribs too. You're going to need them. Exactly how crowded does it feel there already? We have beds in the hallways um sorry hallways as in like you're walking down the hallway to get from room to room but there are beds throughout it oh

god yeah got it see okay presley can i i called you to to help uh help make us feel better okay yeah let's cool it with the beds in the hallway stuff all right i need you to start lying to us i'm gonna hang up on you you call back and tell me the exact opposite of what's happening i don't think i'm gonna make amir feel much better today new york city is kind of the epicenter now of covet positive test cases? Is it because it's actually that much further ahead than every city? Or is New York City testing more people than ever before? New York City has ramped up its testing in a big way over the course of the past two weeks. We now, I read something that we're now able to test about the same amount as South Korea

has been testing, which is cool. Phenomenal. Good news. It was it was where we were just testing like 100 a day up until like middle of last week. And that was not productive and did not really give us a sense of how many people were sick. And now I see within the last 24 hours, 5000 positive test cases out of New York City. Yeah. In one day. Yeah. And it's probably going to, like, it'll continue climbing as we are able to do more testing.

How close are we to, like, worst case scenario? Worst case scenario is not enough beds, not enough ventilators. We're, like, sending people home to die, right? I don't think you have to go home to die. You just... You just can't stay here. Yeah. I think we're close i think we are close and the numbers are still going up and up because you know the quarantine

hasn't quite kicked in yet everything's on like a five to seven day delay right yeah yeah the numbers are going to go up for a little bit from here do you uh advise against takeout no i got taken out yesterday how is that safe you don't there's like an option now on door dash where you they leave it outside the door like they bring it inside but inside the building but leave it outside the door so you don't have any like face time with that person so there's no chance of like uh an exchange of droplets or even like uh touching each other like an exchange of any kind of fomite that's nice yeah do you guys know what a fomite is yeah of course i know oh amir doesn't so why don't you tell sorry sorry about him personally you tell him what a fomite is a fomite is something that is like a surface

a necktie something that is not living that can carry a disease. Right. So if somebody has corona and is delivering food in a plastic bag that says, have a nice day, that fomite is going to live on the plastic? The plastic would be the fomite. Yeah. I see. So the virus lives on the fomite. Yeah. How long can it live on a fomite versus a hard surface? So the hard surface can be a fomite.

Oh, I see. I know, I know, I know, I know, I know. I think you guys get it. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, so you're saying that I'm the fomite and I can actually sneeze onto a tabletop or a counter. I got one more medical question. I see basketball players and they're like i don't have any symptoms yet yeah is it possible to go through the entire coronavirus um experience

without ever experiencing symptoms or they just haven't experienced it yet but it's definitely coming it is possible to have it without experiencing symptoms yeah the entire disease soup to nuts i had it i lost it and i can't get it again yes it is possible no symptoms it is more likely for that kind of uh disease course to happen in kids thank god um for me as a pediatrician um yeah wow but uh there i think there was a study out of Wuhan looking at the children, anyone who was less than 18 who was positive. And I think 15 to 18% of them were asymptomatic throughout their course. And so for testing, is it possible to take a test that says whether or not you had it before? Because that'd be kind of convenient, wouldn't it be?

It would be. We don't have that right now. Is that a possibility? Could we ever have that? We could, but I don't know what the function of it would be, except for that it would be nice to know. Yeah. It'd be great for me to know, and then I could go ahead.

Although, do we know if you can get it twice? You probably cannot get it twice. You probably, if you have an intact immune system you you develop a resistance to getting it again this exact strain wow when can we expect covid 20 to drop i'm already over 19 yeah oh that's a good question yeah that new strain way i hope there's not a covid 20 if it is it might be a must cop what about that idea that like young people could like go out and get it so they can so we can like have it be done with it be immune and then not worry yeah um it's just not you're you're not really

able to control it in that way there's no way to like give it to someone um and it's also still not that smart because people have been getting pretty sick um 30 and 40 year olds have intubated and died even healthy people and you don't like any if if we were just like it's okay for 20 to 30 year olds to just go out and get it, they could still then not go out and participate in normal society. Because those people have grandparents and those people have neighbors that are older than 65 or have like cancer and are immunosuppressed, etc. So it's still like better for us to limit exposure for the greater good. How long do you think we're going to have to be social distancing

and self isolating? I'll throw out things that you I'll throw out some things that you that I'm looking forward to. And you tell me when do you think I'll be able to do that again? Let's start with hugging my mother. Keep in mind, he's never hugged her before. If you self-isolated with your mother and both of you remained asymptomatic and didn't touch or interact with other people for two weeks, I'd say you could hug her all you wanted. All right, cool. A birthday party with 30 people in a room. I don't know. My husband, who is not a doctor, is waving four months with his fingers at me. Thanks, Pat.

This is like Price is Right. Higher, lower, higher. Let's get Pat on the show. All right, a baseball game, 38,000 people at Yankee Stadium watching Derek Jeter at bat. Guys, I don't know, but I'm horribly disappointed about this because we get free Yankees tickets from my hospital and it's a real downer. Is there a world where that's not happening this summer?

Yeah. And then we hear, I've been reading about multiple curves, like yeah, we can slow down this curve, but it'll just come back again once everyone starts hanging out again. We want people to ramp back up in May, so august we got another curve everyone go back to your houses yeah i mean so the like spanish flu of 1918 had this like sort of biphasic um uh epidemic where it was like bad in the spring of 1918 and then bad again

the next fall winter but it like kind of had a period of time where it regressed um and that could that could happen again for sure would that be because of the fomoids or, uh, you have forgotten what that word was already. Of course. This is a bad sign when Jake has, I have to start homeschooling Jake today. This is a terrible. Um, no, that's more like, it's because like a low level of people still have it.

And it like has a resurgence of like, cause that's why viruses in general have a spike in, um, the winter when we all go inside and start hanging out with each other more yeah inside yeah i see that um okay um we actually got an email from a listener that i thought maybe you can help us answer can i read this email yeah presley's gonna have to give him a name yeah fake a fake dude's name um sebastian that's my cat's name that's cool nice hey fellas sebastian here my girlfriend and i are completely separated

during the quarantining of covet 19 she just told me she's worried she's going to lose interest in me and want to break up since we can't see each other indefinitely what the fuck am i right wow is this all it takes to completely botch a relationship we've been dating for over a year and things have been pretty good for the most part this is is this just an excuse she's using to get out of the relationship what should i do how can i see her again in a healthy way love y'all and stay safe sebastian this actually does feel like it's more in y'all's wheelhouse it's it feels more that there's an issue with their relationship but imagine i think imagine um a couple just starts dating uh at what point can they start

hanging out again and is it does it have to be like all right if we're hanging out again we're living together and we can't ever go outside. So I did. I told Jake this and he did not like it. And he probably won't want me to say it on your podcast. But I was reading a Q&A from a medical ethicist and they said not to have sex or kiss your partner, even if you're like a live-in, even if it's a live-in partner. Wow. I don't think that that's hugely realistic

tell that to my wife yeah sorry it's not a problem for me um but if it's like a if this is a casual partner i mean it doesn't sound like that's this is what sebastian's issue is that truly sounds like he might have a um a separate issue yeah i wouldn't even say that your girlfriend doesn't like you sebastian anyway go on um but like if you are in a relationship with someone who you haven't seen very much or you don't know very well or you don't live with i i think you have now's the time to like start i don't know having phone sex or like... Whoa, talk. Really hot. Easy.

But yeah, I don't think that this is... I don't think this is a good time to like come over for a casual hookup. Yeah. I bet booty calls are going down considerably. Or are they going up because people are irrationally horny and they're on Bumble looking for their Corona hookup? I don't know. Not that that's a good thing to do, Presley. I'm not advising it, obviously.

But you still can do, like, get on Zoom. Yeah. I imagine that's what Zoom is for, right? Yeah, definitely. That's why they call it making Zoom Zoom. Jake, do you think she's just using this as an excuse? Yeah. think she's just using this as an excuse um yeah i think i think uh not being able to or or it might also be like uh feeling vulnerable vulnerable in their own way sometimes people say they're

project their fears so you will alleviate them so they'll say i think i would lose interest in you because maybe she's thinking uh he might lose interest in me and she just wants to be reassured uh so that's a that's a possibility i would say this is a great excuse to get out of any like half relationship you're in it's like hey i literally the surgeon general says i can't see you i don't know what you want me to say babe well we can have zoom sex dr presley said what's the point yeah this uh this epidemic is a great excuse to like force a relationship where you were on the fence or force you to break up with someone yeah so you can use that as the as the silver lining here for sure um also pressing you've uh you've repeatedly scolded me over text for um uh um sort of uh not using condoms and stuff.

So if you'd want to make a public statement about safe sex, now's your chance. Yeah, I think that safe sex is hugely important. I imagine, I don't know, what is y'all's demographic? Do you have like numbers on the ages that listen to you? It's, yeah, it's mostly it's mostly a 14 year old, uh, boys in Hebrew school. Yeah. I, I just, sometimes I've heard you guys like sort of, um, imply that condom, that things can be better without condoms.

You guys imply I've said that I've said it verbatim no yeah you have um and it's just not worth it like no one is there you know hiv is very much alive still and um other diseases also are not fun including syphilis chlamydia and gonorrhea and i would highly recommend condom use i agree i agree with the doctor and i and i will agree to disagree but everyone obviously shouldn't listen to me listen to the doctor okay doctor i got one last question for you yeah uh have you heard the theory of like we might as well just fucking do what we're gonna do keep everything open people will die but that's better than the economy like being crippled um that sounds insane to me yeah i mean

i guess you that's like an ethical kind of like how much do you value like human life yeah i don't know um but this you know the the economic impact also is huge on human life too like that's not they're both it's it's horrible in so many ways. But the problem here is that hospitals are already operating in maximum capacity. And that's going to affect people that have COVID-19 in addition to people who have any other medical problem that needs hospital functioning. Yeah, I forgot about like actual shit. Like imagine going to a dermatologist right now like what if you had eczema nobody's nobody's doing that well they they they disallowed or they like ended elective surgery in new york yeah i was also i was chopping i was chopping

lettuce today and i like almost sliced my finger and i was like hmm that would have been really bad me going to an emergency room with a cut finger right now, that seems impossible. It really stings, doc. I have a boo-boo, doc. This freaking kill. Yeah, they canceled one of the big things in the children's hospital. They canceled tonsillectomies. But they're still doing other like kids are still coming

in for chemo and kids with heart transplants are in the hospital and it's yeah it's not a it's you don't want those kids to not have access to the care that they need yeah they need the beds too consider yeah you need the bed we're fucked um but fortunately there's a 1 000 person ship coming our way every governor is uh pumping the numbers trying to get that ship yeah the governor of california is like yeah 56 percent of california's might get it so uh can we get the ship we want the boat i want the cruise the booze cruise. I will say if you guys, like if people are listening and wondering what they can do, I would donate to a food bank.

Because like we were talking about with the economic implications, a lot of people need food more than they, and have less access to it than they did previously. Yep. And if you are healthy and you are able, I would donate blood products because there are no longer blood drives at schools and churches like there used to be.

And we are at a critical shortage. How do I donate blood right now? Isn't that dangerous? There are clinics. You can Google. So there's the New York Blood Bank. Hold on, let me Google it really quick. Sorry, we're out of time.

The New York Blood Center. Hold on, let me Google it really quick. Sorry, we're out of time. The New York Blood Center would be the place to look and you can put in your zip code. And if it's somewhere that's walking distance, I think it's still, I think that is something that is worthy to go out of your house for. Very good unsolicited advice. Indeed. Very nice. Sorry, I wanted to fit it in. Mine was about wearing scarves.

All right, one last silly question to end it on a funny note sorry yeah it's all your fault Presley if I wanted to get coronavirus in the next 24 hours do you think I could and how would you recommend I do it I would go to any random adult emergency room. Okay, done. Not wear, definitely don't wear a mask. Nice. Don't wear protective eye gear. Done. Sit yourself next to the sickest looking person who's coughing and having difficulty breathing

and get next to them while they're getting intubated. Will they let me do that on a wind it would be tough but if you were committed that would that's what i would do all right cool because i made a bet with jake before you got on that i can get it in the next 24 hours i was gonna go find a fomoid and just fucking lick it what's that word again fomite it is fomite yeah fom. A non-living surface. Yeah. Alright. Thank you Presley for coming on the show. Guys, thanks for listening to me. I'm sorry I was a little bit

of a downer. Hey, when this is all over, we're gonna call you again and we'll just do like sex and STD questions. Well, but then we are gonna be having like Zoom sex and you don't even need to use a condom for that. Cool. So it's just gonna be like Zoom sex advice relationship questions. so it won't even be medical advice actually nope perfect can't fucking wait the future is here uh we got a closing theme song from hunter mccoy

in central florida so thanks to hunter for your theme song thanks to uh god i already forget the name of the original theme songer do you remember his name jake no fucking clue man jordan holmes nice jordan holmes uh and thanks to you guys for listening we'll be back as soon as possible we're making stuff on the head gum instagram account um live streams and trying to keep people as entertained as possible while we quarantine ourselves that's right stay safe stay home We'll be back soon. Use condoms, folks. If I were you, this is what I'd do. Ask them a question and you will get the truth. Amir, you're a milf and Jake, you're a do. I guess I'll let you cowards start the episode soon.

If I were you, this is what I'd do.