Segments - Bonus Thursday: Testing Testing

Episode Date: July 15, 2021

Back on a Thursday to launch a new limited-run weekly series, "Testing Testing" in which we quiz each other on different subjects. Today's test is... a Spelling Bee.Advertise on If I Were You via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Original. All right, welcome to a special Thursday episode of If I Were You, but we're not calling it If I Were You. There's like a sub-headline now. Yeah, we're testing a new format. Yeah, nice. Thank you. So this will be a few months now. We're going to be doing a bonus Thursday episode called Testing Testing,

which is what we say when we're trying to see if the microphones work, but also it's like a double entendre. Because we're trying to see if our brains work. Yeah. So the idea being Jake and I will sort of test each other in different sort of trivia-ish style games uh different theme every episode it's actually a mental decathlon is what it is because there's 10 episodes of the show we're in episode one really testing me um oh and for for some different uh aspect of my mind's strength

what have you chosen for me this week spelling spelling b. Spelling Bee was just on the national spelling bee. S-P-E-L-L-I-N-G. Spelling. Final answer. That's a good warmup. That is a good warmup. That's a good warmup. Good job.

W-A-R-M. Did it? Space, obviously. Yeah, there's no spaces. Did he like win or do well in some sort of elementary school um spelling bee do i recall that correctly yes that's correct i won my class um i believe fourth grade or third grade spelling bee um wow and then i competed for the school wide spelling bee and i was humiliated, knocked out in the first round. So I represented the class, went to the school.

I do remember the word. It was original, which I spelled O-R-I-G-I-N-O-L. Original. Jesus. How did you get out of your fucking class one with that shit? I got out of my class one by spelling vanilla right in Joe's face. V-A-N-I-L-L-L-L-L for the double L that you just suffered to old

J-Witz. I then dabbed as a seven-year-old. It's crazy. This is 30 years ago. You don't remember anything from that year except for this exact spelling bee and what word you misspelled i also remember losing the capital b one year later uh on the capital of north dakota which i now will never forget is bismarck okay well um i found you all fucking

the other 49 all All right, yeah. Yeah, we're fucking... State capitals could be next one, but I'm worried about this episode. We're going to try... We're going to go classic spelling bee rules. I'm going to give you a word. You can ask me to use it in a sentence.

You can ask me the origin. You can do your best. But once you start spelling, I can't help you out. And then if you hear a ding, which I'll add in post, you'll never hear it. But if you hear a ding, you spelled it wrong. If you don't hear anything, you spelled it right. Whoa.

All right. Yeah. We'll start with a kind of an easy one. The word is acquire. Acquire. That's, yeah, that could trip a lesser person up because you don't think about that c though it's a c wrong you know just really i was only 50 sure spelling bees are mostly confidence q u i r e as in damn that was easy dab on them

thank you proctor uh no noise yeah you're cutting in and out on my side can you spell that again just for my my edification yeah just for your your slow wi-fi a A-N-L-Q-F. Absolutely not. And Quill. No, A-C-Q-U-I-R-E. Acquire. Bingo, bango, bongo. You're one for one.

Yeah, that was actually pretty easy because I looked it up. I just Googled it. I should have, yeah. I didn't think I'd have to specify, don't cheat. Yeah. No, I've got too much pride to I want to win the right way yeah um as an entrepreneur maybe you can um figure out how to spell this next word entrepreneur entrepreneur oh the eyes are closing yeah this is

not a choir level you're gonna you going to have to think about this one. That's actually, I'm actually, I've come out. I think I need to pass in a fucking weird way, which you do get five of. I know this. I know that this is one of those words that I just spell wrongly on my phone and I press the space bar for it to get autocorrected.

I'm trying to picture what the auto-correct goes to. Spelling is becoming less of a skill now because everything is auto-correcting. You don't need to know how to spell or memorize phonemes. That's why this podcast is so important. Let's go ahead and use it in a sentence if you're so fucking smart. You, as a businessman, are an entrepreneur. You start a lot of enterprises. Enterprising, that's right. It's a French word, so it has French origins, obviously.

Entree entrepreneur. Slammed together to make this awesome, sick-ass word. It's a really tight word. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Wait, actually, don't. Since this is kind of a fucking cliffhanger, let's go to a break.

We'll come back, and then we'll see if you can spell it. And do not cheat. I love that. Do not cheat. I love that. Do not cheat. All right. Thank you to DraftKings for sponsoring this episode of our show. Hey-o, DraftKings. The NFL is back.

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Limited time offer. See terms at pick6.draftkings.com slash. Right. Promos. There it is. Thanks, DraftKings. Quick note to let y'all know that we're conducting an audience survey at gum.fm slash segments and we want to hear from you guys to keep making content you love exactly it's a survey that lets us know what you

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How many P's are in it? That's actually a really interesting question. I'll give it to you because it's so obvious. There's just one P, obviously, entrepreneur. You can't ask for any other hints, though. I'm going to give you that one, though. All right. Entrepreneur. that one though all right uh entrepreneur e n t r e p n e u e r entrepreneur

that is incorrect you i think i think you lost you should write it down you lost some of the like letters in your head it you got the e n t rP right, but then you went straight to the N-E-U-R, and it's entreprenuer. P-R-E-N-E-U-R. I said entreprenuer. Entreprenuer. I didn't get that second R. Yeah. You went straight from P to N.

And then I added an extra E. E-U-E-R. Wow. That's- r yeah i think you went straight from p to and then i added an extra e e u e r wow that's entrepreneur yeah that was a tough one that's hard that's a hard that's hard how about i'll give you a kind of a short one um but that can still be a little tricky all right yeah The word is occurred. Occurred. O-C-C-U-R-R-E-D. Occurred. That is correct. Wow.

He went right for it. A lot of people don't know about the double R. Yeah. I had to rebuild my confidence after the entrepreneur fiasco f-i-a-s-o let's keep it kind of short but moving right along here's a word that always gets me and i i for whatever reason can't commit it to memory i can never spell this word correctly maybe you can the word is privilege as in i have the privilege of using spell check but you don't right now the word is privilege yeah what do you got um so you know on

the spelling thing they're allowed to like write it on a board aren't they i think they have i think you the best way to do it is to close your eyes and like imagine typing it i don't know if you can actually spell it out but that's like the best way to visualize word by word. If I had a little chalkboard, that's really what I need. You need to see it. I could use my phone notepad style because then it would underline it in red. Yeah, which one looks and is bad. The privilege has a sneaky eye, but the way that the eye sneaks up on you is you think that it's, and there's a sneaky eye that's in the end of the word, but it's actually a sneaky E that makes an appearance.

So let's say P, it's privilege, P-R-I-V-I-L-E-G-E. That is correct. Wow. You nailed it. I often throw in the D-G-g-e that is correct wow you nailed it i often throw in the the dge at the end like that style yeah but that's not true yeah there's also and there's like privilege or privilege yeah so many different ways to fuck it up yeah privy ledge good job you um all right it's because i have it a few other a few other toughies. Maintenance.

Maintenance. M-A-I-N-T-E-N-A-N-C-E. Maintenance. That's correct. The maintenance. Spelled fully out. Nailed that one. My maint and my ants.

Yeah. All right. Here's another shorty but tricky fulfill fulfill is f-u-l-f-i-l-l fulfill nailed it absolutely nailed it thank Thank you. I feel like me fucking up entrepreneur as the second word, like ruined me for anyone listening, but the way I've, you know, followed through since then, um, I just hope that I've been giving you easy ones after that one. Cause I really saw your soul leave your body and I felt so bad for you that I'm now on like

easy words for fourth graders to sort of build your confidence back up. All right. If entrepreneur was the hardest word, do you want your second hardest word? Yeah. Conscientious. Conscientious. I can't even say it. Yeah, it's important to be conscientious while thinking of how to spell this word. This is a tough one. No way I could get this one right. I can barely read it. Give me the origin. No, no, just fucking go.

Give me the origin. Give me the origin. It's not going to help. Yeah, it's nice for me. I'm trying to buy time. I guess the origin is the word conscious. So it's like an equivalent of being conscientious. It's making your conscious aware of this thing.

Okay. s c i n c i o u s that's not true that's incorrect i'm sorry again these long words you get lost in the sauce do you want to try spelling it out like um writing it out because i think that might help you out well i already looked it up okay yeah it's con c-o-n and then scientish uh s-c-i-e-n-t-i-o-u-s i definitely thought it was c-i-o-u-s isn't that what i did c-i-o-u-s yeah but you also forgot that e in there you said c-i-n c-i-o-u-s oh i met i that's funny because i knew uh i knew that the e was in there that was not the part that i was i was worried about the end yeah it's the long i mean there was no really they're hard to visualize yeah they are they you get lost in the sauce you're absolutely correct

uh here's another commonly misspelled one that I didn't realize it was commonly misspelled. Interesting. But at the end of a book, there's often an acknowledgement. The word is acknowledgement. Kind of a long one. Going to be hard to visualize it. Let's see if you can figure out how to spell acknowledgement. acknowledgement a c k n o w l e d g m e n t that is correct there's no e after the g yeah it's the sneaky e yeah sneaky a word with tgm in it in a row very rare how'd you know um i i didn't i got there and

i was like do i add this e or not and i was like i think that's got to be the part that's misspelled i took a guess that was your i, best spelling example right there. The fact that you nailed acknowledgement. I bet eight out of 10 people would not get that one. Really? How many words have I spelled so far? I think you're like, you got three wrong and seven or so right. I got two wrong.

I got two wrong, you little fuck. I wasn't asking how many I got right and wrong. I was asking how many we've done. I know how many I got two wrong, you little fuck. Yeah. I wasn't asking how many I got right and wrong. I was asking how many we've done. Okay. I know how many I got wrong. I remember that. I'll live with that fucking shame forever. For another 30 years.

It goes on with original. Okay. You want another commonly misspelled one? Sure. All right. But you really have to think this one out, okay? Yeah, I will. And it's not just going to come to you easily either.

It's going to be hard. The Proctors don't do this. They're not so antagonistic. Yeah. All right. Here we go. And I'm not just scanning a list right now, if that's what you're worried about. Yes.

Well, you clearly are. How's the lighting in that room over there um would you say it's fluorescent fluorescent fl u o r e s c e n t E-S-C-E-N-T. That's correct. F-L-U-O, not O-U. Right. Absolutely nailed it. Fluorescent. You're talking to a guy that just bought fluorescent lights for his basement.

Yeah, but usually you just flip the words. I would just read it as what I wanted to see, which is F L O U. Yeah. I'm like, uh, like those sneaky ease and eyes. I'm actually pretty sneaky smart for a college dropout for someone that barely graduated high school. I think,

I think you're actually minuscule. I think you got, you should actually spell minuscule. Cause that's one of the words minuscule m-i-n-i-s-c-u-l-e as in minuscule you're a small man with a minuscule package i'm sorry jake it's m-i-n-U-S-C-U-L-E. That's right. A minuscule, not a miniscule. I would have never ever in a million years.

And I am so happy to know that you didn't get that one. Oh, I'm really elated. Because I made it into an insult. Yes, yes. A minuscule. So if you leave anything, if you leave with one lesson today it's that a minuscule is a minus school you know what i mean it's actually a minuscule because there's only one s okay well i was kind of like trying to yeah, figure out a way to like be nice and friendly. You keep being like attacking and like, you got it wrong.

You got it wrong. You called me minuscule. You called me minuscule. All right. Give me one. Give me one to go out on. I'm curious how I do. I'm not a very good speller, as you can tell,

but I think I want to be able to prove my worth a little bit. Okay, yeah. What was your search term? Commonly misspelled words. Oh, okay. Interesting. Mine was eighth grade spelling words. So why don't we take one final break?

We'll come back and you're going to spell some words on the other side of this. I could do this. I can fucking do this. This is going to be so easy. I'm going to cheat. Or I'm not going to cheat, but I'll get it right. Thank you to Squarespace for sponsoring this episode of our show. Hell yeah.

Jake, you've been building on Squarespace for decades at this point. Exactly. Eons, it feels like. Yes. So you know how easy it is to use their simple, intuitive, drag-and-drop design technology? Yes, yes, yes. Easy to create, easy to sell, easy to promote.

Squarespace is my all-in-one, first-stop, one-stop shop. Yeah. It's kind of funny that they have also award-winning customer support because it's so intuitive that even Jake was able to figure it out. But if you have any questions, they can figure it out for you as well.

Exactly. And I did need a lot of help. I needed a lot of help. It's easy for everybody, but I still like to have my hand held. They even have AI at this point. You can update written content, product description,

or email with Squarespace AI. You can even buy a domain name through Squarespace. Exactly. Like, you know that movie Freaky Friday? Yeah. How'd you like to own FreakyFriday.com? That'd be great. Is that available?

It's not available. Yeah. But how'd you like to own Freaky Tuesday? Interesting. Freaky Tuesday. So that's when you run into each other and some parts of your personality change, but ultimately it's not a full body swap. Right. Mostly you're just concussed.

Yeah, which is new. It's kind of like having a new personality. Yeah. It's funny. I consider myself a vision lifter, which is why I recommend somebody buying visionlifters.com. Oh, vision lifters? Yeah. Vision lifters with a Z. And not where you think. And it Vision lifters with a Z. And not where you think. And it's not biz with a Z.

So if you're looking to buy a domain name for yourself or for a loved one, build a store, an online portfolio, the greatest way to do that is to head to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, just use that coupon code segments to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Hell yeah. So again, you go to squarespace.com slash segments. Segments.

You save 10% off your first purchase and then use the coupon code SEGMENTS when you're ready to launch that free trial. Enjoy. Thank you, Squarespace. Hey, I'm Jake Johnson, host of the podcast. We're here to help. But this episode right now that you are listening to is sponsored by Brooklinen. Brooklinen provides luxury bed sheets, pillows, comforters, and

blankets delivered straight to your door. How do I know this? Because Brooklinen delivered me a quilt, sheets, pillowcases, and I love them. Plus, Brooklinen has been tested and awarded by experts, including Good Housekeeping, GQ, Wirecutter, and the hosts of We're Here to Help. So listeners can save a ton by purchasing a hardcore bundle, which includes a core sheet set, which is the thing I got, extra pillowcases, and a duvet cover. You can also mix and match.

They do this stripe thing that's cool, but that's a dealer's choice. So are you ready to build your dream fall bed? Visit in-store or online at brooklinen.com. That's brooklinen.com. B-R-O-O-K-L-I-N-E-N.com. Get 15% off your first Brooklinen order and save extra when you bundle. Okay, we we're back let's see if you can spell this eighth grade spelling word or if it will be a grotesque misrepresentation of your knowledge the word is gross uh grotesque g-r-o-t-e-s-q-u-e grotesque grotesque that is correct way yes very nice yes and let's give you one to try to trip you up on the uh on the dismount uh show dismount easy d-i-s no no chauffeur a driver your chauffeur uh fuck i should know this i just fucking bought a limo um i just fired my chauffeur

it's tough with the french words because i'm not a fucking french ass you're like trying to cheer me up by giving me some fucking non-english entrepreneur was hardly French Canadian chauffeur C-H-A-U-F-F-E-U-R that's correct I'm so confident too

they all end in question marks to me but that's why i know i'm right let's go i need you let's go all right give me a hebrew one this one now uh no all right i'm looking up commonly misspelled words now too but you just looked oh here we go let's brain let's blame the proctor okay your proctor gambled so i took some pretty big risks out there i gave you a choir that was a fucking softball we all know that was easy that was easy um okay oh this is pretty good idiosyncrasy oh jesus idiosyncrasy synchrosy um this is gonna be a guess idio is obviously i-d-i-o s-y-n-c-r-a-c-Y. Idiosyncrasy.

So close, man. You got that first sneaky Y. It's C-R-A-S-Y. Wow. I got all the way to the fucking last, second to last letter before I blew it. Yeah, I knew sync was S-Y-N-C, but the rassy at the end.

Yeah, it's tough. Was a rascal at the end. Sure was. Alright. Wow. That was exciting. That's it. Testing, testing, episode one, I think kind of was a low-key hit because we were able to sort of flex on them, but also show people that were stupid as well.

I had a good time. So we'll be back next week with another short bonus episode. Yeah, Thursday bonus, sir. So we'll be back next week with another short bonus episode. Yeah, Thursday bonus, sir. And it'll be my test. I will be the Game Boy. Oh! Oh!

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