Sense of Soul - Coming Home To Self

Episode Date: December 1, 2023

Today on Sense of Soul podcast I have one of my soul sisters with me, joining me from the other side of the world in Norway, Kamilla Visnes. Kamilla connected me about two years ago, she was a listener of Sense of Soul. She was awakening to find her light within, she was in Thailand when she first contacted me,  she had just met her soulmate. But Kamilla was experiencing pain and illness and was struggling to stay healthy, she had a strong desire to heal and grow and over the time I’ve known her she has done just this. Kamilla took my GROW program and since has become a dear friend for life, my soul sister! Dedicated to her journey, Kamilla turned her pain into purpose and with a deep love of Mother Earth and caring empathic soul she set on the path, listening to her inner compass and leaning into to her strong intuition and compassion late nature to help raise the consciousness of humanity and make the world a better place. Kamilla is in the process of creating her own podcast to inspire woman to like Thich Nhat Hahn would say, “come home to yourself.”   Follow Kamilla’s journey on Instagram @kamillahv and if you’d like to reach out to her, email her [e-mail]. Learn more about Sense of Soul Podcast: https://www.senseofsoulpodcast.com Check out the NEW affiliate deals! https://www.mysenseofsoul.com/sense-of-soul-affiliates-page Follow Sense of Soul on Patreon, and join to get ad free episodes, circles, mini series and more! https://www.patreon.com/senseofsoul

Hello, my soul-seeking friends. It's Shanna. Thank you so much for listening to Sense of Soul podcast. Enlightening conversations with like-minded souls from around the world, sharing their journey of finding their light within, turning pain into purpose, and awakening to their true sense of soul. If you like what you hear, show me some love and rate, like, and subscribe. And consider becoming a Sense of Soul. If you like what you hear, show me some love and rate, like, and subscribe. And consider becoming a Sense of Soul Patreon member, where you will get ad-free episodes, monthly circles, and much more. Now go grab your coffee, open your mind, heart, and soul. It's time to awaken. Today on Sense of Soul, joining me from the other side of the world, we have Camilla Visnes.

Camilla connected with me about two years ago. She is the listener of Sense of Soul. She was awakening to find her light within and has a true pain-to-purpose story. She is as strong as her Norwegian roots are and, like myself, has always saw Thich Nhat Hanh as a great teacher. It is her deep love for Mother Earth that I find is so inspiring. So please welcome my soul sister. So yeah, I wrote, it was the 2nd of June, 2022, and I speak to Mother Earth, Shana, a sister, a divine mother, a goddess, and an ancient soul.

The gratitude I'm feeling now as I am finally connected with this amazing, wise, beautiful woman, both beyond. I feel the wholeness of my soul that she's going to teach me so much about all of this that I'm now trying to comprehend. I know you sent her to me for a big reason, many reasons. The energy I feel when we connect is vibrating. I'm feeling whole and connected to all of what is. The doubt that I had is as good as gone now. After all this time forgetting my soul and my spirit, I know I can't be impatient to remember everything, but now having a sister like Shana in my life, I know that I'm in the best hands and I get great guidance. Sometimes I feel like Shana is you, that she is Mother Earth. I can see my purpose and the light is brighter than yesterday i can't

wait to get started on this beautiful journey with her and bring our strong divine feminine energies together you are not going to be forgotten anymore and i'm really excited to be reconnected with the souls you are sending to me. I know that being connected to a woman like Shanna, we are going to make this world a better place. And I'm forever grateful. Something in me tells me that Shanna embodies you, Mother Earth. Maybe all of us do, but I think she is a vessel. I'm so blessed to be connected to a goddess.

Goddess Sophia. I love her. Oh vessel. I'm so blessed to be connected to a goddess. Goddess Sophia. I love her. Oh, it makes me so happy. Thank you for sharing that. Love you, love you, love you. Thank you so much. If I had to describe you, I would say a lover of Mother Earth. I see you as a fighter.

I see you as a warrior, goddess, kind and compassionate. Even though you're not a physical mother yet, I see you as a mother. I see you as nurturing and caring for those in your life. And you're the only person who's ever FaceTime me from the middle of the ocean on a kayak. Or on a deserted island, just camping. Somewhere in Norway, underneath the northern lights. I remember also when I first connected with your energy. I was actually in this room.

This is my old house where I lived up until i was seven i was laying in my bed listening and i was looking at this was in the beginning of my like conscious part of my spiritual journey i started to like understand what was beginning to unfold it was weird because your podcast was just there, and I hadn't really used my podcast app to listen to spiritual stuff. So you were there, and I listened, and I remember the sensation I felt of the deepest wisdom and understanding. I knew in that second I'd never been in touch with, I hadn't started to discover past lives or anything like this but i remember i knew that you carry wisdom that it it's been growing for so many lifetimes and

you have been the pioneer within your field for all of them so i remember that it was a big feeling. I don't know how to explain. And I heard that you need to text her. Take your time, but you need to text her. You welcomed me with the biggest, warmest part and you taught me so, so much. And the way you managed to have so much wisdom and knowledge about all this complicated stuff because that's what it is like it is complicated not easy it's not easy to comprehend the information that you possess but the way you do it so graciously and giving it unconditionally also you have taught me like a mother. So I feel almost a special journey. And I remember the way you saw me. It was a long time since anyone had seen me like that.

So it was nice to have the feeling of coming home to myself with the company of a soul that I had known for a very long time. Because you haven't been a Norse goddess. I feel like the minute I met you, I knew you.

It wasn't like meeting you for the first time. It was like, ah, yay, I found you. I knew you. You know, it wasn't like meeting you for the first time. It was like, ah, yay, I found you. You're definitely, you know, in my soul family. And I felt immediate connection. And there were times where I feel like, you know, because you worry about your friends. And what's amazing is that even though I had worried, I knew you would be okay. I think I knew more than you knew that you'd be okay. Yeah. Because I just deeply felt there was something higher than us that was guiding you. As long as you leaned into that

and trusted that, you were going to just be fine and you have beyond fine it's funny because you know i have 444 in my id number like that and throughout this journey i like i started to like numbers it was just thrown at me like at one point i needed to start to look into this but i didn't need to learn anything like i didn't need to watch like youtube movies or gaia for learning about numerology because it was like something understood it for me. I understood it as probably my higher self. Yeah, I can relate. Yeah. So this is what I've been doing.

I've been getting numbers, and it's been magical. I reflected a bit before we started this. I did my thing with the numbers, and then I said, okay, it's 2 plus 5. It's 7. And then it's 8. I divide by two, so it's four, four. And then it's 2023, so we end with a seven. So it was seven, four, four, seven. And I was thinking, I wanted to look it up.

First, I actually tried the Bible, but then nothing came. It was nothing. But then I searched in the Quran, and I got 4774. And it was just very interesting. It was written. Oh, really? What was written? As you know, my husband is still Muslim.

So I tried to, like, learn from the Quran about, like, I want to read and learn myself to interpret it and read what I read. So Mary wondered, my Lord, how can I have a child when no man has ever touched me? An angel replied, so will it be. Allah creates what he wills. When he decrees a matter, he simply tells it, be and it is. And Allah will teach in writing and wisdom the Torah and gospel. This is in the Quran. I just heard recently that the Quran has a different story,

a similar story, but a different interpretation on the garden of eden story like with everything so i'm starting to get the feeling like the things that are considered bad from the outside when you are not like learning from the inside of it and you're not reading yourself is what comes out as the bad in the world like on this planet well and i think man you know intentionally to control people you know in all religions they took these bible verses and they used it to something that benefit them. There's a way of putting us into system. So it says one translation indicates that the Garden of Eden was in heaven. And it says, Adam, live with your wife in paradise, the garden, and eat as freely as you please, but do not approach this tree or else you will be wrongdoers. While the creation of Eve

is not described in detail in the Quran, it does make it clear a mate was created with Adam from the same nature and soul. And it is he who created you from a single person and made his mate of like nature in order that he might dwell with her in love. So then it goes on, a perpetual residence beneath which river flows, wherein they abide eternally. The fruit is from a tree in heaven. It was not a metaphor or a sinful act or any act that Adam or his wife Eve committed. It's a forbidden fruit. It is not an apple. We just assumed that it's a freaking apple. The fruit is from a tree they called the tree of eternity. And we said, oh, Adam, dwell you and your wife in paradise and eat there from in abundance from wherever you will, but don't approach this tree, lest you will be among

wrongdoers. Then Satan whispers to him, oh, Adam, shall I direct you to the tree of eternity and possession that will not deteriorate? And Adam and his wife ate from it, and their private parts became apparent to them. So it was Adam disobeyed his Lord. Then his Lord chose him and turned to him in forgiveness and guided him. So it's a little bit different, because I mean, like the story that we've been sold in Christianity and in Judaism is that it was Eve who made the stupid mistake, of course. This is the thing, like, when we go back to the history like this, sitting now, like, this is also, like, even in my country, in Norway, how many times I've heard people say, like,

if someone charged anyone for rape, you will hear, like, some people saying she's wrongly accusing him. She's making it up. And it's the same thing. Like, this was probably what happened back then. Actually, if you were raped, that was considered adultery and your husband could leave you. Can you imagine? I'm glad we have developed from that it's still happening in the world also like it's considered adultery probably somewhere either way so it's still around and it's insane and then you have mary magdalene who was named a prostitute when she wasn't. Well, I think the Pope finally did come out and say that

she was the apostle of all apostles. And now you have people like this woman, Elizabeth Schrader, who did research and found that Mary Magdalene was Mary of Bethany. And Mary was not a prostitute. She was from a wealthy family. Her brother was Lazarus. And so we had it all wrong. And I feel like in discovering that we gave her a voice, her true story, but we've been suppressed, buried, raped. Actually, I just recently, I wrote about this like all week. When I think about Mother Earth, now I like connect it to Sophia, the goddess Sophia. Because in the story in the Gnostic Gospels in the Garden of Eden, she goes into Earth. But the archons take her and they rape her and they abuse her horribly and so this

is just the allegorical story but when i think about earth what we've done to earth we have raped earth we have burned earth we have abused her and littered her. Diminished her. Took her for granted. Saying things we aren't doing like that. Trashed her. So if you could imagine your own mother, your own mother, who loves you, who has supported you, who gave you life, that she was taken,

prisoner, raped, and abused, and burned, trashed, littered, soiled. How it would make you feel. And that's what I think that we have to feel. We have to connect with that empathy because it's the empathy that awakens us, awakens something inside of us. I remember when I first started to connect to Thich Nhat Hanh and he awakened this. I'm here.

I'm not non-existent. I'm really here because I'm not lost in the past, in the future, in the noises inside and the noises outside. I'm here. In order to be, you have to be free. And free from what? Free from the thinking, free from the anxieties, free from the fear,

free from prolonging. You can hear the call of Mother Earth and you say, Mother, I'm here as a child of yours, as part of the wood earth. I am free. I am free from all these things that prevent me to be and to enjoy myself and to enjoy the world. I am free is a strong statement because many

of us are not free. I've always been connected to Mother Earth and nature and everything's ever became but he awakened something different about it like where i started to manage to see like how we stamp on our heart instead of kissing your heart what he believes that we should take every step like a kiss to Mother Earth. This is how you can graciously live your energy, live your soul on a planet that we have set and taking this. It was so significant. I remember when I first opened my eyes after doing a meditation, after implementing what I learned.

I wasn't sad. I was disappointed disappointed for sure. I felt very this huge disappointment in myself and humanity, like what we have managed to do and that we do it so carelessly. And it's like the most common thing to hear if you start to say anything about that you care about the environment and nature, it will be like, but what's the point that I do it? Because the neighbor doesn't do it.

Like, and recently I started to say like, but do you do it for your neighbor? Or do you do it for the heart of what keeps you here? Start to see it from a place of love instead of a place of laziness. And I think we should call it what it is because it is lazy and it is horrible it's not about making anybody feel bad but it's to wake up to the wonders that we have and to take care of that because we are made with hearts and those hearts

have a lot of love when we connect to that. We can use Mother Earth to amplify this. Like for me, to heal from chronic disease, I spent 90% of that time sitting outside in every kind of weather connecting to Mother Earth because she took care of me. Like she always has that's one of my biggest wish that everybody gets to feel that feeling because i know in the second you even get to touch that feeling again it will start to take more care because as you know i was diagnosed with a chronic disease and i was very sick when we started to talk and i did my trip to thailand and i got like the realization i needed to start the healing when i came back home that was when i was always out camping and just

communication with mother earth and it's the it was so lovely it was the most oh it was so harmonious and safe and warm and even if it was cold it was still, it was so harmonious and safe and warm. And even if it was cold, it was still warm. It was no problem. I reached the point where I was guided to go sit outside and I was guided to go here and there. So I listened. And the day I healed, it was so magical because I didn't have any feeling coming up to it. I had just been doing my meditation and I also doing your program. And this was just after I believe

when we did the Reiki healing, I was healed. Like I had vomited for almost two and a half years every time i ate and suddenly it just stopped because as we did the reiki healing it came to me that i needed to forgive i needed to start forgiving and you remember we felt like it was a lot of people standing around me when we did this. And you did your part and I did my part. They just assured me like, you're not alone. We're here. You can like this.

It was just a very confirming feeling. And that day I forgave two people that have raped me. And I set them free because it was no point for me anymore to carry them. And my grandmother and grandfather came to me. And all of this happened in like less than 10 minutes. They had a challenging relationship together. And my grandmother forgave my grandfather. And we did it like together.

And this day, the skies, skies the clouds they were so low and it was heavy rain and it was great and my two friends they were sitting inside the house and i was sitting outside on the balcony but i did meditation and i was not prepared that it was that kind of meditation but it was it was funny i wasn't that was when i was gonna do it and for me it didn't become a super emotional and it was just very releasing it was liberating and my two friends they came out after a while and instantly they started crying like two grown men started just bawling and i'm just sitting there like, I was with my eyes closed, and I look at them like,

why are you crying? And I looked out on the fjord and on the sky, and it was purple. All the clouds were gone. Absolutely everything. It was almost no clouds. All shades of purple. It was rays coming down to my grandmother's house the sun was on the total opposite of the planet and i also felt it but i was in my meditation

state still i'm quite good at maintaining a meditation state so they said like it felt like it was vibrating in the air and that it really shook them off. And they really stopped the day. They were just like, we just want to see what you do next now. We just want to be in your presence. It's okay. I was like, yeah.

And I knew everything I was doing, I was going to go down to my sacred place and I was just going to say thank you and be like, I was just very appreciative of everything because it was the emotions I felt like it gave me everything I needed to just continue this road. It were truly, truly magical. And we came down to the sacred site. And they were a bit curious and excited because they had seen what happened earlier. So we stand there and I was just like standing, just looking at the ocean, closing my eyes and just feeling the air. And everything felt so pure and everything was, it was relieved. And all of a sudden, like 50 crows are coming and just circling. We have never seen this many crows all together at once.

It was the nature. It was speaking to us. And I knew all this suffering. I've been suffering since childhood. And I knew it was gone it was not there anymore it was something came and did together with me to take it away like we did together and it was also together with my ancestors. I had been angry with my grandfather for what he had done to my grandmother. And when she forgave him, made me forgive him. And it was just a chance to do that when I had been so angry for so many years.

I love you so much. I love you too. Definitely the beginning of my enlightenment. You also had found your great-grandfather's journal. In reading it, you were really connecting with him. What you were experiencing, that was very special. In his house. Yeah, and I remember finding that journal also when

i started to read and he was sick he was in the hospital like yes that's right it was the same as i went through like he was in the hospital for months the doctors didn't know any medication to give him. And he didn't really want medication. He didn't really believe medication. It was like it was our stories were synchronized. He hadn't written anything about God or Jesus or nothing. But in the middle of the journal, he starts to pray.

Like he starts to ask, please God, help me, help me get through this and heal me and all this. He was begging for forgiveness for his sins. He felt punished. I could sense that he was angry that he was punished. He didn't understand why this was happening to him. When I read that, I also realized that this is something about myself that I'm very proud that I have. And the ability I have is to... Inside me, it was always a voice telling me that you will learn something from this too. Even if it hurts now, you will learn from it.

It's not for nothing. And I'm not saying that things should happen. Like, that's the point. But things will happen. Either way, you cannot prevent things from happening. Because that's the world. That's just how it is. ability to look at the challenges and the darkness as an observer rather than a victim. I think I've been given a gift to overcome these things, these kind of feelings around

challenges and around things happening in the world. And I remember even back in the time when I could be more angry as a child, actually. I could be very frustrated for a lot of things. But I was shown my future many times when I was a kid. And I knew that I was going to meet somebody that had a dark past. It felt like I was prepared when I was a kid. But it's not before now, like, even the recent, that I started to remember the insights from back then.

Because then, you know, I learned law of attraction, and I was thinking, like, maybe I was shown and then I started to manifest it, but now I understand that's not exactly how it works. So with my intuitive abilities, I like to lean back and see what comes for me because so much guidance, and I'm so prepared for the things that I meet and I still need energy that is challenging me, for sure.

But I have a way different way of handling it, because I see it from the perspective of my higher self, of God, of source, of whatever people call it. When you narrow it down, it always comes to what you choose to believe with your heart. If you've listened to my prior episodes with him, then you know he has a ton of wisdom to share. And he's offering Sense of Soul listeners a special discount to take a deep and personalized dive into Kabbalah and the unfolding of your own personal journey. If you're interested, go to MatthewPonK.com backslash senseofsoul to learn more and sign up. Now back to our amazing guest. You are so dedicated to healing your purpose to, and to see it through. To me, it's so interesting because I do connect it with the ancestors.

When I think about you, I see your grandmothers with you, your grandfathers. I mean, it's just something that I can't separate you and your ancestors. It's so interesting. I've never, well, no, I probably have, but there's some people that are strong like that for me when I interact with them. And I think that just like you did with your grandfather and your grandmother, like you healed in this life and you saw that it also was healing for the past and it also is healing for the future. But I think that more people need to connect with that work because even though the spiritual work is amazing and connecting with guides and all the spiritual stuff,

we can't forget that we're in these vehicles. And that healing, I think, is what connects us to Earth, right? This is the 3D world, right? These bodies will go back into the Earth. People want to skip that healing or don't want to do it, but I think it's very important. For me, it was probably the most crucial part in it. Like that was what I truly, truly needed.

Because when you go through the healing journey, like I believe life is always healing, like there will always be a healing journey. But to come to the point where you understand that, now I need to begin to change myself. I think that is probably the hardest part to get to, to realize, like, you have all these things that is not serving you. And you have been taught that you should never change your personality. And we have been misled in a way of what it means. It's not bad to say. I remember saying to my best friend, because I learned from Joe Dispenza also,

and he has this saying that to create a new reality, you have to change your personality. And when I said this to one of my friends, him, it sounded horrible to say that. It was just like, why don't you like your personality? But we have an ego. The ego is there, and the ego will feed, and the ego will try to make you do all the harm to yourself. I've also changed parts of myself that I did like, but it was still not serving me.

So I couldn't continue. I had to also do something about that because it was not serving me. This is what I've been guided to do all the time. You have to always look at the things that are serving you or not it's the work you do it's the routines in the morning like everything coming to how much it serves you you're such a risk taker i admire that about you like that's why i see you as a, because you're just so brave in your pursuit of happiness. I feel very supported.

I have, like, to be connected with you and my friends. And also when we go back, like, how supported we are from the universe and I have I feel humble every day I wake up the energies I get to feel throughout the day because I'm very very blessed in the position I am in and I know that by taking those risks gives me lessons that I can teach others I know that I'm going to be fine. Probably it can put me in a really, I started to call it a human place, to serve the collective. I know that I'm serving myself because we are all the same and we are connected, all of us. And if I am a person that can be of any power to do that,

I will do whatever it takes to reach that power because our planet truly needs it. And I work as a breakfast manager now in a hotel on an island in the ocean just close to where I live. I was visiting that place a lot when I was a kid also. This is like a common place for all the local people here, but we also have a lot of guests from all over the world. And I'm also a storyteller, so I do like the history of the place.

There's so many great souls that's been living and running this island, and I've been lucky to learn from the locals and people that have lived there but the story is always about like that the men went out fishing and the kids and the women they were running the whole of this island when all these men went out to fish they had to take care of everything when they were gone. And when they came back, they had to take all the fish, and they also had to comfort and take care of the men that's been out risking their lives. When I started storytelling, it was just my divine feminine.

It was just like, this is our challenge, too. Now we're going to speak about the women. You're changing the narrative. It's amazing. Like, you have pictures around the rooms on the island. And in my room, it's this one picture of this man owning the island and his wife and another man. And they had been fishing and were holding a salmon. And under, you have, like small notes,

fishing crypt and their names. And it was only the men's names that were mentioned. Her name was not even there. But then again, like, I'm so happy to see this because it sparks that feminine fire that we should just own. So I remember I had a big group and it was like 25 men but they also brought all their rights and I was doing this storytelling and I started to like share the story and I talked about the women as much as the men and at the

end of it I just have to like to say something now because we have heard so much about the warrior men and we have always heard about how much men are fighting and how much men are doing and the hard work and all of this but where would all of this be if it wasn't for the women?

Like how strong these women are and have big hearts and how much love they have managed to have in every place they are and now you're sitting here with your wives today and look at them how would you feel if their stories were never told and all the men were just standing just applauding and i was like so it was just such a great feeling to feel this because i could see like yeah because we are all masculine and feminine like we all have those both sides so it was the first time i managed to like touch the energy of the men in the room to be heard like this and that they took it like this. They could relate from their feminine side also.

That was a big accomplishment for me. when you travel and when you go places you always witness those places where this is still going on and it's i'm trying not to be so sad about trying to always find the way how i can be a part of change instead of sadness but it still brings me to the deepest sadness like to know that people are struggling so much from this and that women need to go through all these things that are happening in the world i know one of my purpose and theories to to be a channel for those women and to be a healer for those women that was taken away from the ability to heal because they were not allowed to. What happened to healers?

Like what happened? Like they couldn't. They were not allowed. And it feels so great to be in a world where you will be hurt. Every time I talk about this, it feels like people are standing, just lifting their hands on my shoulder because they really need someone like you and someone like me to be in their voices now

because it's too much suffering. It is amazing that we've come so far, but yet we haven't. But you're right, with voices like yours, oh God, you're so powerful in your story. You can just sense this authenticity and just this real desire to help not only other women, but also just everyone, you know, to find that balance between the energies and also mother earth. It's very touching. And, you know, I want to kind of go back because the land that you live on, there's a connection with the land. Well, and also really cool thing that you had showed me the Viking graves, I mean, on your land, isn't it even named after your last name?

Which is incredible. You're right there on this little bay or peninsula. What is it? This town by the ocean. The Hazel McForest. Every time I come home,

it's also very emotional to me. When I was a kid, the land, the nature always assured me. And for me back then, it was the nature that was talking to me. But having learned what I do know now is that for some part, it's been basically people that's been talking to me. It's been so much sadness because I was away for so long. I stopped when I was 11. When my grandmother died, it just stopped.

It was too painful. My grandmother was my human safety here. And big parts of my life, that's been real. We know that there are hardships in families and it's a lot of difficulties so when my grandmother transitioned it was just lonely and i cut off connection with everything a lot of sadness of being away for so long but now but now it's pure happiness because we are in this energy

and being in this frequency that I'm in together with my higher self and all that surrounds us especially in this place it's very powerful but I guess I have a husband in Thailand and you know it's been not easy and it's been easy and it's been many, many, many things that have challenged us both in

many ways and now when I came to where he's from in Thailand. As a feminine fighter, it was hard having to accept the way, for example, for me, it cannot make sense that women are not allowed to pray with their voice, but the men are. So I raised questions about many things when I was there, and it was not always so easy to raise those questions but I knew that I had to I knew that it was my purpose to do that I knew that

we are to learn even more about what was preached because it's not everything that is right anymore because human have putting their ego inside of many things now. So every time things got hard or I needed to go by myself, I walked down to the ocean just close to my husband's family house. And I remember the first time going to go home and just being like what I knew and where I like to just think freely without thinking of nothing. And I came down there

and I was crying like because I love this man so much also. To have moments where you're like even in doubt, it was very painful and I remember this one time going down to the ocean and the same feeling as I have here just came and just just wrapped around me and I knew like it was never about the place so to have that knowledge now that it's within reach, no matter where I am, it's about my choice to connect. It was a very, very powerful experience to have because it was like all of this and I always feel like I know how I feel in my house.

It was all there and I knew like, and saw some darkness I could I could even like no I was never scared I cannot say that because I was never scared but it was times where it was only me believing what I was believing and all of these people were challenging me and and it was fine because I knew like in the second that i just walked down there i get the feeling again that i'm safe and everything is okay to know that i'm always protected and held and understood by something that's way greater than any of this i know like i don't need to be afraid of nothing I don't need to be scared going into situations I don't need to worry I am guided like in every relationship

especially when we come from two different worlds almost like it can't be compared in any way they have a strong belief about like how bad it is to be with someone that's not in their league like we have to see the whole picture either way like but at the same time like how they how they chose to understand and how they chose to embrace and welcome the love of us because they see like I had people sitting speaking to me in Thai I didn't understand nothing but I understood everything because they spoke from their hearts we have tried to to get this relationship for many lifetimes i'm sure so he has been very disappointed that i stayed in norway for so long i was going to stay for two months and now i i would be staying for seven so i have just a really really really good feeling like going ahead now because i'm so grounded in what i've learned and

understood and what i'm yet to understand but i'm no longer like looking like what more do i need to understand because i know i'm gonna understand when we arrive at the exact time enough when it's supposed to just unfolding when it's unfolding but I recently listened to a podcast with Michael about Angel could only listen like 25 minutes I was there and

during those 25 minutes your energy, the energy you had in the conversation of the two of you brought me back to like the the first time i had the feeling of creating something together with the divine and it brought me back to take not on it brought me back to Thich Nhat Hanh it brought me back to my spiritual journey and to come back home to the feeling of the desire that you have

with what I have received this line of compassion to begin the work that I'm supposed to do or that I want to do that I truly desire to do that I want to do, that I truly desire to do here, is that I can make changes and differences for the better in places like where my husband's from, for kids, for the people that haven't been seen or heard.

Because you have in Thailand, for example, it's not uncommon for kids to be hit. And by believing people like Thich Nhat Hanh, I have also come to the place where I cannot truly be angry with someone for anything either. I can only choose to go to that place with as much peace as I can to help them transform this and evolve away from it. Yeah, I'm just very, very happy that I was able to do this position. You know what's crazy?

Is that there's been so many things that have tried to steal your voice. And actually, when we first started working that was a big one for you you didn't want to speak up you didn't think you could you know you were you know it's holding you back I mean I remember you even telling me you know you could physically feel you know in your throat you know something blocking you from trying to steal your voice but yeah that's why i say you're a warrior because you're like no you fought against it and you found your voice and i mean the things that you write you, the way that you speak is truly inspiring.

So thank God that nobody stole your voice. I would have ripped my throat out. Pull your throat tracker out. This is... pull your throat checker out this is I believe that many people many energies have tried to take in

your voice and my voice and many of the light's voices for a lifetime. Yeah. But I've also come to believe that this is the lifetime where we succeed, like maybe where we actually start the evolution that we have been fighting for. like basically it was always like it was always I've been so deep down that I knew like I could never have to to take my own life could never like that's I know that it was never within my reach of nothing.

But at times where things were so hard and dark, and it was, I had all these authorities around me where I had the hospitals that said, you will never be healthy again. I had the administration for work in Norway saying that we want to put on paper that you can never work again. And I had the court system and men in power that was saying that I was lying about rape. And it was just so many things that at some point I also remember asking, like, how do I get through this? How am I still here and it even came to the point where I started to convince myself like you're gonna die something will take the life from you. And it was not sadness for me. It was absolutely not sadness.

It was how I got through it. Because I knew it's not going to be forever. But then when the power and the force awaken, nothing will kill me for sure. I know now that it's not going to happen. pure happiness of living of being here in a place where we can do good and where we can spread what we know we can spread the love we are healers we are powerful beings

that choose to love the next and the one before us like we love ourselves but it took longer to come to loving ourselves because it was always easier to love the people around us i know you feel the same and you have done this since you were a kid also and to always have all this love for everybody else. All you want is to help the whole of the world, always. And to get the liberation of wanting the same for yourself. And to come to see that that was also the meaning.

That was also the purpose. It was never about everybody else. It was about you and everybody else. It's just a very beautiful place to land in. And now when I have, like, this is also my biggest desire with my husband to see him love himself truly. It's a desire I want for everybody on this planet is to come home to the feeling of self-love. Because that's what you teach me, Shana. You show me this in the most beautiful way and I remember the resistance I had at the beginning like

I get crunched every time I think of it but then I was lucky enough to be connected to you and I knew like you gave me you you sent me that energy and that force to come to this place. And I'm just so, so grateful for everything. And I'm also grateful for the challenges because it's lesson. But I was very, very, very deep down away from loving myself. myself and so many people that I meet every day almost that I know do not have this feeling for themselves so to have a teacher like you the teacher you are you have anything to be that light for someone that truly needs it. Because for me, I don't think I would have healed Shana. It for me was, it was so close to just going into the disease and just being there. Because I was so tired.

Yeah. And then I met you and I got all this power to continue. I got all this energy because you were holding energy for me also. And you supported me and you showed me who I was. I couldn't see. It wasn't possible for me to see this. I knew like when I got the disease, like I heard then also, like I heard that if you will heal this, you will find a way. Like I knew also that it wasn't about the disease anymore. It was the level of being tired, I would say. And now I can never use the word tired anymore. I can't even say, like, I'm tired because this is not tired.

This is nothing like that. That's just something else. But what's going on in the world now is it's so many tragedies, what's happening. It's also so many miracles that are happening every day now. I didn't know I had this power at all. I had forgotten everything about it. And I heard something that the doctor said was impossible

very serious disease and I know that when I have this power to do this for everyone too I think so just you telling me that story about those men clapping

that's a miracle in itself thank you so much You're telling me that story about those men clapping. That's a miracle in itself. Yeah, isn't it? Thank you so much for coming on and sharing your story. Thank you. Yeah, because it's important to share because so many people are feeling that. So many are feeling a lack of that, you know, or somebody is in it and they're letting the disease control their lives or someone else control their lives. And that sovereignty that you experience within is available to everyone. And I love living vicariously through you and your adventures in Norway.

You're all in my energy. You know, I say now to all the guests that I have at work that we have to remember that we are living in a very exciting time. This is extremely exciting. Because with Thich Nhat Hanh, like the way he shares his word, he shares his wisdom and shares his love and compassion that it teaches that it no religion is bad it's about what you choose to learn from either way and that we are beings of mother earth and we are here to take care and to love yeah it's pure love that's for me love truly healed every part and every aspect of my life there was not only the love

with me and my husband it was the love i got to experience with you it was the love I experienced with my family it was the love that I experienced with my friends and the love that I experienced with nature, with mother earth with spirits and the darkness that sometimes

arrives and comes and goes it can never be compared it's not strong enough not enough power in that and thanks to you and thanks to universe and thanks to divine feminine all that yeah if anyone listening wants to get a hold of you where can they find you and now you know the camping nomad is coming. I'm slowly building my website. And I would say like right now, the easiest way is to contact me by email.

But I will also release my own podcast very soon. That will be beautiful. Only though speaking. I love it, love it, love it. And then your book will follow as you're a good writer too. Thank you. Yeah. All right, love.

Well, thanks so much. Thank you so much, Shana, for everything. The way you have empowered me and heard me and seen me. It's truly, truly special to have a sister like you. So much love. Thanks for listening to Sense of Soul Podcast. And thanks to our special guests for joining me. If you want more of Sense of Soul, check out my website at www.mysenseofsoul.com,

where you can work with me one-on-one or help support Sense of Soul Podcast by donating to my coffee fund. Thanks for listening.