Sense of Soul - Horror, History and the Human Experience

Episode Date: October 29, 2024

On today's special Halloween episode on Sense of Soul podcast, Shanna and her guest are sharing ghost stories. Guest Gina Grossbauer is the founder and podcast host of Shivers Haunted. Where you can learn about communication beyond the grave. Gina is the author of the book, Burn Her Down, available on Amazon. In this episode Gina’s shares her journey and interest in horror, history and the human experience. Shanna and Gina also share their own personal experiences at some of the most haunted places on Earth. Go like and subscribe to Shivers Haunted podcast! Happy Halloween! Shanna highly recommends Gina, she does tarot readings, and you can book a session and learn more at her website: https://shivershaunted.com/ Gina can be reached @ShiversHaunted on Facebook, Tik Tok, Youtube, podcast sites, and on meetup.com local in Raleigh, NC.

Hello, my soul-seeking friends. It's Shanna. Thank you so much for listening to Sense of Soul Podcast. Enlightening conversations with like-minded souls from around the world. Sharing their journey of finding their light within, turning pain into purpose, and awakening to their true sense of soul. If you like what you hear, show me some love and rate, like, and subscribe. And consider becoming a Sense of Soul Patreon member, where you will get ad-free episodes, monthly circles,

and much more. Now go grab your coffee, open your mind, heart, and soul. It's time to awaken. Today on Sense of Soul for a special Halloween episode, I'm going to be telling ghost stories with Gina Grossbauer. Gina has her own podcast called Shivers Haunted, where you will learn more about communication beyond the grave. She's also the author of the book Burn Her Down, available on Amazon. In this episode, Gina shares her journey and interest in horror history and the human experience. Gina is a tarot reader and intuitive, and she was recommended by a listener and a dear friend, Donna. Grab a blankie and turn on your nightlight. Please welcome Gina. Hello. Hey, nice to meet you. Yeah, you as well. I'm

excited to talk. I love talking about this and I haven't in a while. And I like to normalize this stuff because I feel like we're in a world now that is more awake and willing to be vulnerable and speak about their stories. Yeah. So I'm excited. Thanks so much for coming on. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks for having me. So tell me about you.

I'd love to know like your story. I know that your mother's a big part of your journey and do you mind sharing your journey and how you got to where you are? No, not at all. I'm originally from Northeastern Pennsylvania, the Scranton-Wilkes-Barre area, for anybody who's watched The Office. But yeah, I grew up Catholic and was part of the whole thing. So I did altar serving. My sister and I were altar servers and helped with the church picnic.

My dad was a reader. The whole nine yards, we were involved. And our priest was our priest since childhood. Like he came over for dinner. Everything was great. And it was just one of those things that like we did every week, going to church every week is just part of the routine. But it wasn't really like, what do we believe?

So we got a new priest when myself and my sister were 18. And it was just like, what is this? Like, what is going on? It just felt like a magic show. And so I was like, this is absolutely not what I believe. Like, let's peel it back and really understand what are the roots? Like, what do I believe in? What is going on? And myself and my sister and my mom would always go to psychic fairs and look at crystals. And so we were already kind of dipped our toes in the water of that side of things, but never fully. And so we moved to North Carolina in 2017.

My mom started her own business called solely holistic in 2020 and became a Reiki healer and archangelic light healer, really a hundred percent dialed into this entire metaphysical world. And so I've always enjoyed the ghost hunting side of things and the paranormal. When I was in school in Philadelphia, I was in a ghost hunting group and we were able to go to like Eastern State Penitentiary and Pennhurst Asylum and do different ghost hunts and stuff like that. And so I was also really introduced

to tarot cards there. Like I knew what they were, but I never did them on my own. So I really became a reader at that point in time and just really did it for friends and myself. But after coming down here, started doing tarot readings for other people and getting more involved with the intuitive side and from the paranormal and the intuitive side. And from the paranormal and the horror side, that's always been more of my passion. I have always been a big fan of Halloween and of like deeper, darker stories, but I used to be afraid of absolutely everything. Everything scared me so much that my brother used to call me shakes. And yeah. And so I would never go to a haunted house I would never do any of that stuff and it was just sort of one day like watching a scary movie was just

like you know what this is fake like this is just art and this is makeup and this is just actors who are playing a part so really dissecting it and being like what am I so afraid of then I started applying it to other layers of my life and this is what it all became. Wow. I love that. So you like faced your fear. Absolutely. Yeah. Right. You know, so I grew up Catholic as well, so I can relate to that. And it's funny because there's a lot of practices that my mom would do that I remember as a child. They were kind of woo-woo, but yet she was doing them. Catholics actually do have a lot of

different rituals that they do to ward off bad energy. And it's funny because it's just depending on who's delivering that. If you're Catholic, you're okay. Yeah. I mean, a couple of months ago, my cousin got married in a Catholic church and this is the first time I've been back to a Catholic church since 18, almost 10 years ago. And my brother was joking around like myself and my mom were going to burn up if we walked into the front door. But it was just so interesting to see like all of the angels on the stained glass windows. And most of them have their hands out and have light coming from their hands.

And it's like, that's Reiki. That's energy healing. We're all speaking the same message, just different languages, essentially. Jesus was saying, do as I do. And, you know, he was a Reiki master, you know, dealing with his hands. And just looking at how much the divine feminine has come forth over the past just few years, especially. And as a woman, wow, we have really come so far. Yeah.

I mean, we're not witches, you know? And I look at what witches are. So at one of my Reiki retreats, I had my best friend, Mandy. He used to be a co-host with me. When we did her ancestry, we found that she had the last Salem witch, quote unquote, who was hung. Her name was Ann Pudiator. And at the time I was doing her ancestry and we were doing research on her, by the way, she was not a witch. I mean, she literally was like an herbalist. She was unfortunate to have two husbands that passed. So she was a widow. She had a lot of land. So she was wealthy and she just happened to have a mole. Then I was working with two sisters at the same time.

They took my Reiki class, and their last name was Putnam. Now, I don't know if you know anything about the Salem Witch Trial, but it is the young Putnam daughters, the young girls who were the accusers in the witch trials. And so I'm like, I do ancestry. I was like, you know, I can do yours. And sure enough, their ancestry, their lineage went right back to those same Putnam's descendants of the accusers and a descendant of one that was actually killed. I mean, it was just mind-blowing. What beautiful healing for both of those lineages of now we're going to reclaim the accusatory nature of our family, and then we're going to bring beauty to the witchcraft of it all as well. Yeah. Talk about synchronicity. And I do believe that I felt like through my lineage, my ancestors reached through many, many, many, many to find someone who would be open enough to be able to tell their stories and give them voice.

So being in the spiritual community, what is your opinion on the voodoo and hexes and curses and things like that? Well, I did find a curse in my family when I was doing my ancestor. I was quite shocked. It was a story about a priest who had abused some of the children and many of the parents got together and killed him. This is like the story. And it's a very small little shrimping community at the Gulf of Mexico, which also had slavery, you know, big time. So this land, you know, and I think about all the hurricanes and how many times, you know, hurricanes have taken them out. They've had a lot of stuff on that land. But the story was, there was this, they called him the Lugaroo. It was like this werewolf creature that would come out at night and like scare the children.

And then they talked about the land being cursed. And when I read that, I was like, holy crap, like, this is still affecting, you know, my lineage. But I had done about six or seven years of work on my lineages at that time. And I feel like really all it needed was awareness. And I took a look it up because I was like, what do I do with this? There's like an unwinding prayer. And I did do that. But I still was feeling like all the work that I did and all the acknowledgement and had already told a lot of their stories, like that already was enough. I think awareness, even when I think about an individual's healing, that's kind of how I

looked at it with a curse. So if there's patterns in your life since you were a child and you're able to go back and recognize the root of the cause and then hold it and give it love and light, then it no longer has any power. And that was my idea with the curse. But I do believe they did stuff like that, of course. I think that a lot of the people from Saint-Domingue, which is now Haiti, you know, this voodoo is actually one of the oldest shamanic practices ever i think it's like the oldest and many of them came over with their beliefs and their traditions but they were also forced to be catholics so someone like maria laveau also was a very devoted catholic i mean she went to church every day the archdiocescese, naming her a sainted woman.

And what I learned in researching her in my tree rather than outside of it was that they feared her because she sat with the sick and she wouldn't get sick. She would also go and pray with prisoners. Jesus would have done that same thing. You know what I mean? And they feared her, which I feel when I look at any dark mother, quote unquote, that's their power. They feared her power. And for a woman in the 1800s, a woman of color, she was of mixed race, born free. Her grandmother is the one who bought herself out of freedom during the Spanish rule. She, I think, was a pretty powerful, amazing woman and not to

be feared, actually, to be honored. Absolutely. That's my take on it. Fair, yeah. But I definitely believe there is a dark side and I believe anytime you're talking about power, you're going to find that there's a lot of people who will use it for their own benefit. Absolutely. Yeah. What are your thoughts on it?

Yeah. So, I mean, I've been able to experience Robert the doll in West Florida. Robert the doll. I'm thinking Chucky. Okay. Yeah. No, Robert the doll in Key West Florida. Robert the doll. I'm thinking Chucky. Okay. Yeah, no, Robert the doll. So Robert the doll was part of the Otto family in Key West Florida and was given to Robert Jr. from Robert senior. And they,

the story is that they had slaves and the idea is that they really abused their slaves. And so the lore is that the slaves put a curse or a hex on Robert. And so all of these bad things started happening after the doll really came into the family, into the home. And so everybody would blame Robert Jr. And he would say, it's Robert the doll. So when we were in sixth grade, our library teacher had us watch like a haunting and read all of these scary stories. And I think that's probably where a lot of the roots come from for me. But yeah, I mean, we went to Key West in 2021. It's just a family vacation. And being able to be there, I was like, I have to see Robert the doll. Like we're here,

we have to go see him. So he's in a museum that's in a civil war for. So the idea is that you're not allowed to take a picture of Robert in this museum without his permission. And if you take his picture without his permission, then all of these bad things are happening to you. So, so many people have taken his picture without his permission that they started sending in apology letters and they're like sorry for taking your picture Robert I apologize my life is so bad now please forgive me and it got to the point where it's so much that they now have a tv next to him and it's just new letters that come in every single day from people who have seen his picture

on the internet or have taken his picture shared his picture whatever it may be so uh that's crazy so i convinced my mom and my sister to come with me to to see him in the museum and we were the only people there it's a free museum to go in and this lady was giving us the whole run down the whole spiel and she's like well you know what to expect so like have fun and she opens the cart and it's just a fort so So it's a big circle. So you see all the way down the hallway. And my excitement of seeing Robert was so, so enjoyable to then as soon as she opened that curtain, it felt like you got hit by a truck. It was just such a shift in energy and all of us, all three of us felt it. And so I have just an iPhone, iPhone 10. It's the same phone that I use on a daily basis,

same phone I had back then. And I took the camera out. I was, I had no plans of taking his picture. Absolutely not. My phone apps, take a picture of this dollhouse. That was in the beginning. The camera wouldn't work. Snapchat wouldn't work. Instagram, any app that had a camera would not work. So I was like, okay, I'm not even going to bother. So walk down towards Robert and you could just feel the energy in the room just felt like it was pulsating. I've never in my life felt anything like that. Any paranormal things, any paranormal

investigations, nothing has ever felt like that. And that's how I know that it's definitely something different. My sister, who's more of a skeptic than the rest of us started crying. She's like, I have no idea why I'm crying. My mom, who is all of the spiritual things, she was like, this just feels dark. This just feels heavy. So, I mean, that was really my only one-on-one encounter with something that really truly felt like a curse or something not just paranormal. Like this feels like something that was forced here, put here.

So I think it's very much what you're saying of the more that you give it power, the more that the lore of Robert grows of be afraid, don't take his picture. Like, I think a lot of it is that, but the energy that's around it is absolutely unbearable. Wow. Yes. You have to really learn to trust your discernment when you're working with the stuff. There usually is a clear kind of, this feels good, this doesn't feel good with your body. I know for myself when I do Reiki and also what I've learned to do as a very sensitive empath is sometimes you have to put up protection, right? So that you don't experience or take with you this energy. And sometimes you have to kind of let it right? So that you don't experience or take with you this energy.

And sometimes you have to kind of let it down too. So you can experience it. Do you know what I'm talking about? And what do you do and how does, what does that look like for you? I do know what you're talking about. Also an empath, but yeah. So on a daily basis, I'll just, as soon as I wake up or when I go in the shower, it's just, you know, remove any negative energy away from me. And then I kind of put my hands in like the receiving position and it's like fill me up with all light and love and surround myself with this level of white light and positive energy. And so I do that every morning before I leave the house. But yeah, I mean, especially when you're going on like a paranormal investigation or going somewhere like

that, it's imperative because hitchhiking ghosts are real you know the more and more and we can talk about paranormal separately but more and more that i've done actual paranormal investigations it's kind of rare to feel like there's an actual soul it's more just energy that's like lingering residual energy yeah um but nonetheless like hitchhiking goes to exist and that energy can come with you and impact your, your wellbeing, your dreams, anything like that. So it is very important to either have physical items like crystals or sage with you, or just continue to imagine yourself with that white light of energy. Because even if you do have that bubble around you,

you're still going to be able to sense whatever's around you. It's just that it's not going to impact your, your well-being. Like you're not going to start being freezing or being hot or worried or scared or like none of that will actually impact you. You'll just be able to be like, oh, it feels heavy or it feels different in here like whatever it may be and then before you leave that location just brush yourself off like dry bathe three times for body mind spirit and say anything that was here stays here my energy is my own and i leave with my energy alone and i make sure to just say that same mantra do those actions

pretty much any time that i go somewhere that has residual energy, paranormal activity, whatever it may be. Yeah. You know, like you said, your sister was crying, like that emotional connection. I've had that before in my ancestry journey. Early on, I had gone to my ancestors' plantations. One experience where I felt super emotional, like it hit me like right in my chest. It was heavy, you know, and time got weird. There was something happening. And I also went to the Myrtles Plantation, and I don't have any ancestors that were at Myrtles Plantation. It was just my cousin and my youngest daughter,

who is always along with me in all my journeys when it comes to everything. But we're walking along. I'm by myself, actually. And I'm walking, I don't know where they were, but I'm walking like in these, you know, live mossy oak trees, you know, the big ones that are like amazing. And all of a sudden, Gina, I start humming like the song. And actually, I know, the big ones that are like amazing. And all of a sudden, Gina, I start humming like the song. And actually I was recording the oaks as I walked. So you hear me and it's definitely a tune and I've never heard of it before. And it was like a musical classic song. I mean, I don't know. I mean, I still remember it. That's weird too, because I could sing it to you right now. And later on, I'm listening and watching this video.

I'm like, what is this? What am I singing? This is crazy. Well, just this year, there was a connection. Does that ever happen to you? Like, I mean, there's, it's been like four years since that happened. And now I'm just discovering I was watching the movie Cabrini, which if I had to tell you like what was my introduction to the divine feminine, she might have been one of the first because her story is amazing. There's a connection with her in New Orleans all the way to, I mean, all the way to California, but in Colorado. So I always felt like that was a spiritual connection for me here in Louisiana. Every time my mom would come here, she'd be like, we have to go to the Cabrini Shrine, where there's definitely an energy you feel that's unbelievable. So I've always had a connection to her story so I'm watching this movie and in the movie all of a sudden I'm hearing the song I was singing I was doing the dishes like

watching the movie I stopped everything I like researched like who wrote this what is the song and I find the soundtrack and what's so crazy is the name of the freaking song was called the divine feminine i mean that's wild i think especially whenever we talk about like doing readings for people and even doing ranking for people any messages that come through it's important to share because of situations like that like it could mean absolutely nothing to you and you're like what the heck is that song or what does that mean? Or that random piece of information. But you say it to these people and they're like, I don't know what that means.

Take it with you and see where it pops up. And then you never know because stuff like that happens all of the time. Yeah. I love synchronicity. Love it so much. So fun. Yeah, absolutely. And I think it goes with the Claire's as well of,

you know, for me, the Claire knowing that Claire sentience is what is the strongest for me. And sometimes it's really hard to understand what's my own thoughts, and then what's sort of guided or intuition or what have you. And so it'll be situations like that, where it's like, I'm just doing the dishes, and I'll have music on in the background. And then I'll just think of a random song. I don't really think anything of it. And then the next song that comes on is that song. And then I'm like, ew, that's crazy. But yeah, it's really about kind of understanding where it's coming from. Like, is this my original thought or is this sort of a nudge in a direction? I agree with you on that residual energy thing, by the way. We have a story here in Colorado. It's called Third Bridge. So me and my oldest daughter and

my best friend, Mandy, all went out to Third Bridge to do an investigation. This is like the first and last that we ever did. And what's crazy is we actually got actual proof. I mean, we got a picture of what looks to be like a native coming up, like its head coming out of the ground and a horse like staring right at him. But that's what my thought was, too. This is something that happened here and it's still playing out here. But you know, sadly, a lot of people like kids in high school would get in cars and they'd go over here to try to scare themselves. And many of them died on their way there. Really? Yeah. So then that made it even worse. But the whole story actually goes back to this young family, the Hungate family. There was this young

couple. They were only in their 30s. They had two young children, I think six months and three years old. They had like a farm and land. It was the time when they were making treaties with the natives and some of them were really pissed that the elders were making, you know, just giving their land to people and they had been pushed out all the way to Sand Creek, which is like at the border of Colorado and Kansas. And two natives came in and killed this family. And what's crazy is at the time, most people had just came back from like a civil war. Abraham Lincoln actually was president at the time. So there was like no police, really. It was military. You know, it was like our first governor.

And they took these bodies in Denver, like out for everyone to see and was like, this is what they did to this poor family. Like, if you see any, you kill them. And then that's when a bunch of them had went and surrounded Sand Creek and they murdered that whole village of elder natives. They weren't even, you know, part of the group of, you know, who is responsible for it. It was just horrible. But then that also led to the first time the government ever brought this to court and said this was unjust. Wow. Crazy. But that story that's been told that has a lot rooted in American history

and all that, I think is what kind of keeps that energy here. What do you think about that? Absolutely. Yeah. I mean, anytime that I teach Ghost Hunting 101, it's like you can move into a house and the house can be haunted by a family that still exists. It's whatever the energy is fed, you know. So let's say that you walk into the kitchen of this new home and it's just like, oh, it feels really heavy in here. It feels really sad. It feels really, I feel really agitated in this kitchen. This could be because that family that lived there previously had a terrible, terrible fight in that kitchen,

never saged, never replaced that energy, and then just kept it up. So again, it goes back to everything of just what energy are you feeding? And so it's the same sort of thing for these stories, these paranormal investigations, these locations. It's how much fear and how much negative energy can we add into this? And it doesn't necessarily even have to be negative energy. It's, you know, let's say you go to a haunted house and you stay the night and every night Mary's walking upstairs at 3am with her red dress on. Mary could have never existed in said house. But because the story is just so prevalent, the amount of energy put into,

I hope we see Mary, I hope we see Mary, I hope we see Mary, can literally conjure her up of just this fake energetic entity, essentially. So there's no soul attached. It's just storytelling and the power behind words. Yeah, you are so right. I had learned about the story of Baphomet. I don't know if you're familiar with Baphomet, right? A lot of Satanists have him as a symbol. But in my journey through the Gnostic Gospels, what I discovered was way back when the Knights of Templar were captured and taken and killed, they were asked, who are you worshiping? And a few of them said Baphomet under like torture. But what I ended up discovering was Baphomet in a code backwards is also Sophia,

which is in the Gnostic Gospels as Mother God, which a lot of people believe that they were holding a lot of this wisdom, you know, hidden books and, you know, some of the esoteric stuff that didn't make the cut of the Bible. Then you go forward in history where Eliphas Levine knew Arthur Waite, and Eliphas actually drew a picture of Baphomet, which was just representing light and dark, female and masculine, moon and sun. I mean, everything was just those polar opposites. And Arthur Waite said, can I use that picture? We're making a deck. Can I use that for my devil card? And you have a picture of it. And this is what you see it as. And so it's true. It's all about the stories that are passed down, the visuals and what we're just told to believe.

Absolutely. I mean, one of my biggest goals is to have a haunted house, like a Halloween haunted house. And the title of it would be follow the rules because there's nothing scarier than just following the rules. But yeah, I mean, from the Baphomet perspective, it's, I love all the imagery of as above, so below, you know, I have that tattooed on my back and it's just this idea that there is no, yeah, there's no right or wrong. It's just difference of perspectives. When we first started getting into all of the spirituality, one of the things that really pushed me into like 100% believing was this, the idea of the reincarnation and just that we come back into each somebody who is very anti-LGBTQ community. There's neither side is necessarily right. It's just why do you believe what you believe and what are you meant to learn? And it's to have a true understanding of both perspectives.

So I really, really appreciate that mentality and that idea that you're not, there's no hell. You're not being punished for being a bad person. You are here to learn whatever that bad lesson may be. You are here to experience whatever that good lesson may be. There's like everything that you need to learn is, is here. That's what we're doing. So I always ask my paranormal guest what is the most scariest place you ever went it's over in your neck of the woods that field I think it's where the battle of Gettysburg that area I've heard this more than once yeah yeah so growing up in Pennsylvania I have not yet been to the actual battlefields of Gettysburg, but of course have heard all about it. But I am a huge, huge, huge fan of Pennhurst Asylum. They are in like right outside of

Philadelphia. And so when I was going to school in Philadelphia, we went to Eastern State a bunch of times. And that's a penitentiary that was more for like criminals rather than any type of patients and I had always heard the stories of eastern state and anytime that I went there I really never felt anything like there's this one specific section where they have all the photos of the victims of the people who were imprisoned there and that's kind of heavy but it's more it's more just sad to kind of see these photos rather than any type of lingering energy. And then going to Pennhurst, I went for the first time when I was in school, but then back again for a Halloween event, they do like the Halloween haunted story of Pennhurst is that all of the patients were so, so badly treated that they closed the doors in the 90s. And one of the things that I think keeps me going back to Pennhurst is that I think a lot of the spirits that are there or were there are more appreciative that the truth is out there. Like, Hey, this is how we were actually treated because there's no, anytime that I've been there, any building that I've been in, there has never been negative energy. It's just always prevalent energy, but it's not bad. There's nothing bad

about Pennhurst. And so I think that's what really keeps me going back is that it's like this appreciation for like, yeah, we really messed up in history, but we're kind of trying to make it right now by letting people know this is never going to happen again. And this is why the doors are closed and everything like that. So, yeah, I mean, I think Pennhurst will keep me coming back and back and back, but there's a lot to it. It's because they want their stories told. I think one should give them a voice. You know, that's the healing part. It wants the truth to come out, really.

I agree. That's what I think. Yeah. So therefore, it's not necessarily bad. It's just part of healing, which a lot of us don't want to heal. It's like ignorance is bliss. We don't want to face the horror in history, but it's pretty freaking terrible. I mean, let's be honest.

And this is what this country is built on. Yeah. I mean, you even talk about just religion in general or life in general. It's you have a fear. If you do this, you're bad. If you do this, you're going to hell. Fear. Yeah. Fear. Yeah. And so I think when it comes to conversations, I think when it comes to spirituality, when it comes to everything that I stand for, it's all about not ignorance is bliss.

It's you have to do what you can to face your own fears in order to move forward. I think that a lot of healing is misunderstood as trauma and it's actually just fear. It's just truly a group of what is going to happen. What is the world of the unknown? What if I do this? What if I do that? The what ifs, the fear that comes from that. So that's why I'm just kind of always on my soapbox of watch scary movies and face these things and talk about these things because it is really, really very important for people to face these things, to just move forward. And what I'm hearing from you and what this is for me too, the opposite of fear is love. And if you meet fear with fear, I could see how that would be feeding it, as you said. But if you meet it with love, then it's healing.

Yeah. Or even just out of curiosity of, you know, for me personally, being used to be afraid of absolutely everything. I was also just such a planner. I want to detail every single day that I possibly can on a wishlist dream. I wish I could still do that, planner I want to detail every single day that I possibly can on a wishless dream I wish I could still do that but I know the world is totally different as I've become an adult and see these things play out in real life and so that I think goes hand in hand as to if I have everything planned then everything is under my control and I have nothing to be afraid of whereas like the realities of life are that just doesn't happen. So whatever these fears are, and then you can just start going with the flow. So out of curiosity, what if that happens rather than the result of it being like, oh my God,

what if that happens? It's just, what if that happens? We'll see. So kind of reframing that to curiosity and yes, a more lighter perspective as well. And so facing your fear, as you did, you see fear differently. Now you've given it a different perspective. You don't fear fear. Right. Yeah. And I mean, of course there are certain things on a regular basis, more humanly thing of like, Oh, I lost my job. How am I going to pay my bills? Like those types of fears I think are more humanistic. And that's just something that like you kind of have to figure out rather than work through but you know if you go to a movie and you're terrified terrified terrified of clowns well then you know what's the root of that it's not just makeup and a person it's what is what

is the root of that so it's kind of just taking these surface level things and saying, what is the actual meaning of that? Why does that impact you so much? And peeling it back from there. You know, that movie Poltergeist was a big one. I've probably seen it like a gazillion times. But where I live is I live in Arapahoe County. My kids went to Cherokee Trail High School, right? I mean, when my best friend moved into her neighborhood, they were finding

a thousand-year-old bones of natives. I guess these people didn't watch Poltergeist. I don't know. But my house has been always pretty active and we've had paranormal investigations here in this house, but I've never felt negative energy, you know, and maybe that might be because I don't fear it. So maybe if I was afraid of it, maybe I would feed it negative energy to meet my fearing energy. Do you see what I'm saying? Like, cause you know, energy attracts like energy. I basically tell these people I'm too busy. I'm like, you're at the wrong house. I'm not the one. Do you ever feel like you have a job to help them in some way?

Not really. Honestly, I used to think that, but the more and more that I've seen these places and kind of experienced it in my, in my childhood home as well it's just about like your time here is done like so now it's just about me reclaiming the area and I think a lot of paranormal investigations a lot of these like ghost hunting reality tv shows it's they could just be done in two seconds if it was like this is our spot now you are not allowed to be here anymore like just setting those boundaries and saying that out loud nine out of ten times that has worked

so i think that the glorification of come here ghost and talk to me and damage me or hurt me like you are you know like you you are just asking for trouble. You're asking for resentment. You're asking for residual energy to be negative. So if you're just like, you know, I thank you for, thank you for this home. Thank you for allowing us to be a family to live here now. And I wish you well. And some people want the spirits to stay. I'm curious on your perspective of that for your own home. But, you know, some people are like, you know, you can hang out as long as you don't bother me. But it really is, it's 100% up to the living person. Like, what do you, what do you want?

I feel like if I felt it was draining me or causing any negative energy or anything like that, I would tell them to go. You know what I mean? But usually it's very quick. It's never been an issue. I can't not that I can remember. And I did get a lot on spirit box. I mean, I did an episode a few years ago. I mean, like, holy crap. I mean, they were very intelligent answers, you know, to definitely validate that there was something here. But I wasn't scared. None of it was scary. I didn't want to do it at night, but that's only because my own, you know, kind of conditioned thinking of like scary Freddy Krueger, I don't know. But in actually, once I did the paranormal investigation and heard them, I even was less scared, to be honest with you. And I feel like when I see these investigators on television, like poking at him and stuff, I feel like that's

like a bullying mentality and I don't like it. It makes me feel like, sorry. I'm like, God, why don't you just, you know, I mean, if you're there to help, like what's your intentions? If it's just to get clicks and views and stuff. I don't like that. I really don't, Gina. I feel like it's not respectful. Yeah, it's not. Yeah.

I mean, even for me, like in my own home, I apparently the only person who ever lived in my house before me was just this blind old lady. So even on the washer dryer, there's like little bumps where you would see like the rail where to turn it. Yeah. And I never felt anything. I knew that she was still alive when I bought the house. And that was four years ago. I don't know if she's passed, but probably about a year ago, all of a sudden, like I started seeing things out of the corner of my eye and it was this woman. And so it was like, if you are the previous owner of this home, you're allowed to just kind of hang out and stay. Please just respect my space.

And so I let it go for about a week. And then it was just like every time that I would like turn my head quick in my house, like I would see something and I was like, all right, you got to go. I appreciate you allowing me to live in your home. I appreciate how you left this home for me. And I wish you well. Ever since then, not a single thing in my house. So I really do think that it can be that easy. And it's up to the person. Yeah. I do remember and recall like about over a decade ago, my friend and I went to the Whaley's house out in San Diego, which some people say is like so scary. Like no one's even been able to stay there overnight. So crazy. And I was in the mind frame back then. I was just dipping my toe into my journey spiritually. Just, you know, I don't even think I had taken any mindfulness

classes quite yet. But I felt like I was kind of like in a picking kind of person, you know, kind of like a, I didn't have good intentions anyways. I was there to kind of get the adrenaline rush to see if I could catch something. But it was a totally different thing um like when i visited like the murderous plantation where i was like really opened to connect with the land and what might still be there and that's when i had received that song um but you know i i definitely agree with you i I think that, you know, possibly this energy is here either because it's been fed a lot of fear or it needs healing. I mean, there's a purpose that it's there. Do you think so? Yeah. The older places of when we came and colonized this land, those are the areas that seem to be the most active because there's

a lot of trauma. Yeah. I mean, I think it goes back to the same story of the bridge of just what do we know about these lands? What do we know about these places? And a lot of it is that negative energy or that negative storytelling where people are getting pushed out or kicked out or slaughtered even. And so, yeah, it is a lot of,

goes back to the fear of all this was terrible. It would be terrible to live there at that time. But yeah, it's kind of what we know. And it's what we don't know. We have been sold this way of thinking. There's a lot of history that hasn't been told and I feel like it wants to be known so you must love history yeah to an extent for sure yeah do you ever go and look into it like we have another one that's really popular here um it's a restaurant it's the melting pot it was once a jail and now it's an amazing restaurant and I didn't know any of this I just knew was haunted. But then I wanted to do the research to find out, like, where was, when was this? What was going on in Colorado at the time? Was there anybody like, who knows, like Wild Bill or whoever, you know what I mean?

Was somebody here, you know, that was significant to Colorado history? Like, that's how I end up doing the digging. I did the digging. That's super cool. Yeah. I mean, I think any of the locations that I go to, I'm, I'm trying my best depending on the intention. Like, you know, before I'm going to the paranormal investigation, I would rather not know what's going on so that I can just authentically experience and then do my research later. Even for Pennhurst, like I,

of course, knew everything that had gone on at Pennhurst I knew all the stories I'd seen the history I've done the history tours but my mom and I went to paranormal convention in May there and there was one building that I've never been in I've never heard of it and this was the only building that really felt different not bad different just different and so she anchored Archangelic Light there, which I think was very helpful. And then when we got back home, then it was like, all right, now it's time to look up this building, what's going on. And this was the violent male patient ward. So this is the only building where violent males were in. So it was like, all right, that's,

that's kind of cool to know that. But if I knew that beforehand, would I have influenced the outcome of what I was feeling? Would I have walked in there with fear? So yeah, my idea is kind of look first, check later. Yeah. I'd be better off to not know the history first. Don't tell me the history first. And actually I didn't know much about the whaleys or the and I and I got stuff at the whaley I you know they say take pictures you know and you might get something I totally got which looked like a silhouette of like somebody with like a cowboy hat I mean we're walking around with phones now you know what I mean we're gonna get evidence of everything you know UFOs whatever you know It's possible now. Last night, I got the Northern Lights. It's pretty amazing. But you know what? You said the men. I mean, I had on Echo Bodine

a while back and what she had told me was that there are a lot more men than women. And that when she does see women, it's usually because of a connection to like a child or, you know, something like that. Do you find that at all? I do find that men are more prevalent in terms of energy for sure. But I also think it's dependent upon who I'm with. Like anytime that I'm more by myself, I think because I'm more drawn to just women energy during the day, I connect more with women spirits. And so any type of spirits or ghosts or anything like that that I've actually been able to see or connect with have been women. But in more generic locations, if we're doing like a group ghost hunt, nine out of 10 times, it will be more prevalent for mames. Yeah. Have you ever felt like you did not protect yourself enough and ever brought something back

with you? Inner sheep eyes? Yeah. More for like actual living people. I think that goes back to like the empath side of things. So when I first started doing tarot readings, I was just doing them for family and friends and myself. And so there was no thought of protection because it was just, you know, this is all just casual fun. And then the first time that I did readings for strangers, the very first person that I did was this super cute old man. And he was just so wonderful. But all he wanted to know was, how's my wife doing? She's on the other side. So sad. So sad,

so sad. And so I did his reading for him. And as soon as he walked out the door and started bawling my eyes out and I was like, I don't know how to get back to myself. How does this not impact me? How do I leave that with him? And so ever since then, I've always kept either a hematite bracelet on or a hematite crystal to keep it truly to myself. Like hematite is all good for just my energy is my own. I'm protected, that type of thing. And so it kind of goes back to you saying of like when you do experience anything paranormal or energy in general of like lowering the guard down. I would always advise against that because these

things can happen, especially for people who are empaths. Like you are going to feel whatever that feeling is, whether it's a spirit, whether it's residual energy, whatever it may be, you're going to feel it regardless. So at least keep yourself protected from it. Yeah. You know why I said that is because for years I was like protecting myself. I felt like I was unfuckwithable. Like you could not penetrate this amazing strong ass bubble. But then I almost felt like I got being an empath where I can actually feel what's going on in you. And so I was learning to let it down a little bit and being able to experience that and knowing when to put it back up. Because I am too. I get very emotional. I mean, I remember like trying not to get tears

on clients basically, you know what I mean? Because I'm sensing so much from them, which is not good. And I even thought maybe I can't do this work because I'm just so emotional and such an empath. And I'd go home with pain. I mean, if a person had right finger pain, then I had it later on. I'm like, this is crazy. You know, so I knew that protection and spiritual hygiene was so important. But I got to the point where I was so protected and almost like made a wall instead of, you know, like a very clear bubble that you could still, you know, see. And I am more visual. You know, you mentioned Claire knowing. Claire knowing does

not come well for me. Claire knowing takes four years for me to put shit together, okay? I'm more of a visual person for sure. I think that sometimes we talk ourself out of these supernatural experiences, these paranormal experiences. But I think that most people have experienced this. They're maybe just living from a fearful place to be able to talk about it and acknowledge it. Absolutely. Yeah. And it depends on the company too of who's willing to be open to hearing it too. True. I'm not going to be telling most of this to my neighbor i promise um a few years ago i had on keith linder he lived in the bothell hell house in washington zach and the ghost adventures went there and it was really sad because you know what they spent a very short amount of time there and they basically came out saying he was full of shit. And here he was like being vulnerable,

telling the story and like risking his reputation and all. Why would you? And he felt like they didn't even spend enough time there. And so he did have other investigations and other people who did research and that did validate his story. Not that he needed it, but my God, not to discredit him. You know what I mean? And so I felt that was really sad for him and for anybody because, you know, I know what it feels like to think like, oh my God, you know, they might think I'm crazy, you know, if they listen to my podcast, right? And, you know, I'm not, and I know you're not. And, you know, I just know that people need to be more open and, you know, and also respect

people's, you know, experiences. This is your experience, my experience. No one can take that from me. I'm not telling you I believe something that's been told generation after generation. You know, I can only speak from my own experiences and I would never discredit anybody else's. Yeah. And I would also kind of double that by saying like, I would never be a hypocrite and say, you have to follow the rule just as I don't want religion to tell me I have to follow the rules. However, like if you do want to work through some of this stuff. Like this is just some examples and advice of what you could do to help yourself. A woman. Yeah. I'm so grateful, you know, that people are talking about it. People like you're having podcasts about it. Can you share what your podcast

is? And also do you do readings as well for people? Yeah. Yeah. So I do the tarot readings. I do Reiki. I do psychic readings, intuitive readings, anything like that. Mediumship is not my strong suit. So no, no connecting with actual people, but yeah, more about the living and whatever people need to know. But yeah, I mean, my podcast, I started it in May of 2022 and it's called Shivers Haunted. So you could find it, all of my stuff, you can find just Shivers Haunted so you can find it all of my stuff you can find just Shivers Haunted and yeah it's more of just kind of talking about stuff like this of what fear has over people what power fear has and different types of movies and what these movies can represent for you so you know quick example would be like a ghost movie of like a haunted house would be representative of

need to get over some grief. Whereas like a slasher movie would be a need to release some of the ideas of revenge that you may have. And so you can release and work through some of these fears and these emotions by just watching movies. And then that way you don't have to really actively do anything or harm anybody or harm yourself in the process. But yeah, it's kind of putting art and spirituality and all of that in one little box. I really love your take on this. What's your favorite movie? Do you have one? favorite scary movie is as above so below it's about the the paris catacombs but it's it's just a good representation of like different levels of hell and what lessons can be learned just through exploration and adventuring and i love the saw franchise i think that a lot of people are turned off by it because of the gore but you know when you look past the fact that it's just makeup and good actors, then there are real lessons that can be put into use there.

I had to heard from a friend who does not really usually like scary movies, but she found a lot of wisdom within The last exorcist she said that there was a lot of divine feminine coming through in that movie which i haven't seen it yet but i want to because of that so i love that you know we can look at something and see it from a different perspective and learn something yeah yeah i mean the same exact thing can be said for uh rosemary's baby it's all about like women and women's choice and the idea really like what is my power i'm not crazy i my emotions are valid my opinions are valid my thoughts and feelings are valid and the fear of sort of being dismissed for your own version of truth i think that that fear is more prevalent than, but it's that same sort of thing that we see with the last exorcism of the femininity and the power slash control that is revolved

around that. Well, thank you very much. It's been a pleasure to meet you. If you ever want to chat again, let me know. I'd love to have you back on. Fun. Yeah. I mean, same for you. Thank you for reaching out. Thanks for having me. Thanks for listening to Sense of Soul Podcast and thanks to our special guests for joining me. If you want more of Sense of Soul, check out my website at www.mysenseofsoul.com where you can work with me one-on-one or help support Sense of Soul podcast by donating to my coffee fund. Thanks for listening.