Sense of Soul - Surviving Suicidal Ideation

Episode Date: April 22, 2024

This episode contains content that may be alarming to some listeners. Please read the show notes for more detailed descriptions and take care of yourself. Content Warnings: Mentions of Mental Illness, Death, Suicide and Sexual Assault. This episode is informational or educational purposes only and does not substitute professional medical advice or consultations with healthcare professionals.  Today on Sense of Soul Podcast we have Gina Cavalier, she is a Inspirational Speaker, Clairvoyant Healer, Mental Health Advocate, Author, Filmmaker, Artist, and Spiritual Teacher. Gina has secured two publishing deals, with her first book as a co-author and illustrator of the upcoming release, Surviving Suicidal Ideation - From Therapy to Spirituality, and the Lived Experience, available for pre-sale now on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.  She is the founder of The Liberated Healer, which is a wellness brand that culls various health and healing resources is also the host of The Liberated Healer Podcast, where she aims to dive deeper into traditional and alternative methods of healing for the mind, body, spirit, and soul. Visit Gina’s website: https://www.theliberatedhealer.com

Today's episode contains content that may be alarming to some listeners. This episode mentions of mental illness, death, suicide, and sexual assault. If you or someone you know needs help, please seek professional medical advice. This episode is for informational and educational purposes only and does not substitute professional medical advice or consultations with healthcare professionals. So please listen with care. Hello, my soul-seeking friends. It's Shanna.

Thank you so much for listening to Sense of Soul Podcast. Enlightening conversations with like-minded souls from around the world, sharing their journey of finding their light within, turning pain into purpose, and awakening to their true sense of soul. If you like what you hear, show me some love and rate, like, and subscribe. And consider becoming a Sense of Soul Patreon member where you will get ad-free episodes, monthly circles, and much more. Now go grab your coffee, open your mind, heart, and soul. It's time to awaken.

On today's episode, we have Gina Cavalier. She is an inspirational speaker, clairvoyant healer, a medical health advocate, an author, a filmmaker, artist, and a spiritual teacher. Gina is the co-author of an upcoming book called Surviving Suicidal Ideation, From Therapy to Spirituality and the Lived Experience, available for pre-sale now on Amazon and Barnes & Noble. She is also the host of the Liberated Healer podcast, where she aims to dive deeper into traditional and alternative methods of healing for the mind, body, and soul. And it's my honor to have her with us today for a very important conversation. So please welcome Gina.

Hi. Hi. How's it going? Amazing. I appreciate you having me on. Yeah, I'm excited. Your podcast is wonderful. I've watched it, listened to it. And yeah, just why don't you introduce yourself, Gina, and tell everybody who you are and where you came from. Hi, everybody. So grateful to be in your presence and in your space today.

My name is Gina Cavalier. I have a company called the Liberated Healer that I started about three years ago that sort of was divinely guided to me all of a sudden after being a student of healing myself for about 15 years. I have a background in the entertainment business, working at all the studios. And I just wasn't in flow and I was sad. I was feeling disconnected from myself and my life purpose really kind of had a self-hatred that I didn't realize was playing in my mind over and over again, because we can be very cruel to ourselves

and not really realizing it. And that whole thing becomes just a giant ball of wax, people pleasing, whatever your thing is, it just kind of rolls together and just starts to collect. And I would, I reached my breaking point to a point where I had been on and off suicidal for many years of my life. I've since childhood from abusive family life. And, you know, I've been on my own since I was 14. So I've had to kind of really be a survivor. And then really one day just said, I'm tired of feeling this way. There's got to be another way to live. And I got to figure this out and put my healing journey onto my own responsibility and just kind of went down that really difficult road. And it was hard. It was many dark nights of the soul, many, many, many, but felt divinely guided and supported by spirit. And then my voice

and my direction just started to show up and the people started to show up. People like you start to come into my life and you realize when you raise your vibration that all the right things that you need will show up, that all we are is love. And I've been able to absolutely a hundred percent heal my suicidal ideation. And I want people to know that it can be healed, that you don't have to live like that your whole life. I'm like overly nice to myself now. If any negative thought comes in, I really look at it and say, OK, you could have done better. You could have worded that better.

You could have handled that better. It's OK. What have you learned? How are you going to do things differently next time? Like I've become my own best friend, literally. And what happens is you don't hold onto that energy and it just flies away and you move on with your day. But people who are suicidal or have trauma, they get stuck in the energy of that thing. They get

triggered and it eats up their whole day or their whole week or their whole month. And they fall into a pit, a rabbit hole pit of obsessive, dark energy, all kinds of things. And that's when people get lost. And I want to help people who are lost. It's a true pain to purpose story. Yeah. And the name of your business, Liberated Healer, that really sticks out to me because at the beginning of my journey, it's one thing I kept saying is how free I felt. Yes. You know, I studied clairvoyant healing. And so I would do healings on people and readings on people. And that's how I learned about energy. And actually learning about energy was what helped me because I was so sensitive and I would say, oh, that's real heavy energy. I can change it into light energy.

And I realized that I had way more control than I knew I had. And that's really cool. Whether it's spirit, like what you're talking about, like you have a connection and you know that you can, you have a soul tribe behind you. Or for me, it was, oh, that thing in front of me, that real dark, heavy energy, I could transform it. Just put a bunch of love, throw a bunch of love on it and a bunch of light on it. And then all of a sudden it'll get freer. And the Liberated Healer was not my name. It came to me through light source. After COVID, I was in bed. I take it, I'm very sensitive. I took CBD to try to sleep and it made me high or something. I don't know. It's not supposed to, but I had like this really, like, I was like all of a sudden, like in this weird tunnel. And I was just like, wow, this is

weird. And this big light opened. I don't know. Maybe it was helping me transform my energy and my whole room filled with light. And it just said, you're going to start teaching people now. And here's the name, the liberated healaler. And I was like, what? I'm in a good place. I just want to be a student. And they said, nope, nope. This was all so you could teach. And I was like, oh, shizzle. That's a huge responsibility. That means I really have to be on my game. If you become a teacher, it's stepping into responsibility. And that was scary for me. But that night I stayed up all night.

I didn't go to sleep. I wrote the mission statement. I built the website. It was divinely guided. And then I just sent out an email to everybody that said meditation classes on Monday. It was just boom. And it's evolved a little bit. But I did not know that I was going to write this great book.

How to heal suicidal ideation. I wrote the pot. I got the podcast. I got the trauma therapist to do it with me. I got the publisher. I'm doing a documentary. I have a nonprofit now. I mean, literally it's just rolled out my life purpose 20 years when I was in the entertainment industry, it felt like I was on an endless uphill mountain, pushing up a boulder. And I never felt like I actually achieved anything. I never felt connected to the product. Obstacle would come and it would feel just so heavy. Like my life is terrible. How come I can't ever get there now when an obstacle comes I look at it what's the problem here and then it's gone and I move to the next and that's what I think when you do your life purpose will help heal any type of depression or suicidal ideation you have and because you are feeling connected with your mission and we all have mission. The part of letting go of all the other stuff

is where you need support and help. And from people, stories like mine, oh yeah, you know what? I've always wanted to be an artist or I always, whatever it is, I'd be an explorer. You know, that stuff is in your heart for a reason. And spirit constantly tells me every single day,

you guys live too much in your head and not in your heart. And if you think about it, any single person in the world would probably be suicidal. If they were in my head at the time, when I was suicidal, the things that I would say to myself were mean and abusive. I was an abusive relationship with myself anybody would have been suicidal I was not worthy of anything I did not deserve anything I didn't belong anywhere and it played in my head like a record and when somebody said something mean to me I would fall into my obsessive little victimness and my self-pity and be like of course I don't don't deserve it. And I would get sad and I'd be alone. And now I'm in that vibe. And so what goodness is going to want to vibe with me when I'm in that pit?

Now I'm creating an isolated work. And then yes, there is light and dark. Then the darkness can come in and say, yeah, you're right. So now it becomes that thing. So when people say that I'm sad, I'm suicidal, I get it. I can understand exactly. I go right to that point and remember where they are. So I know where they are. I know where you are, but just slowly retraining your brain and saying, nope, nope, you are not get up, go for a walk, read something, watch a podcast. That's why all these things are really important. No, you are not that.

And what happens is just like anything else, just like if you went to the gym and now you're, you're going to get healthier, you are going to get healthier. It's going to fall off. You're raising your frequency. You're not going to be able to hold that energy anymore. You're going to be able to talk to yourself that way anymore. So I kept thinking about, I was like, I would never tell my daughters what I'm telling myself ever. Like you're not good enough. You're not worth it. All of those same things. Yeah. Kind of the point where I do many tests with myself because I was such a people pleaser.

Anything that they needed. I always use my real world example. Like, for example, I moved to a more secluded place and I don't, I'm not around a lot of friends and family. So when they come to town, I get really excited. Right. family. So when they come to town, I get really excited, right? My friends surprised me yesterday and I plan going to yoga, which is really important for my mental health. I wanted just to cancel everything and go out with them. And I said, sorry, I'll meet you for a little while,

but I got yoga first night and I was sitting in yoga, which was 90 minute hot yoga. Not that I don't love them, but I put myself first. I would have never done that before. No, I'm on my mission. This is, I need to care for myself. This is for my mental health. And that just went, girl, I can't believe that you take yourself first and you got to appreciate yourself when you do those things that you consider good as a proven practice and sharing this with other people because are you doing that? And then also acknowledging it because acknowledgement is the important part. If you don't acknowledge the patterns that have changed,

you know, we just, we do need to give ourselves some gold stars once in a while. It's so easy to come out of it because everything in the world is trying to pull you out of this space that you're in. You know, your friends, your family, society, the news. When you think about it, truly, those things weren't working for you. And so the thing that was working for you is this hot yoga and, you know, you staying on your track. But it is easy to get pulled out of it and I think things are constantly trying to and I still got to see him and hang out with him for a couple hours

and I said I have an interview in the morning and I'm going to go home to bed early and I wouldn't wouldn't have done that before things that we tell ourselves are like oh they came here and it's such a special thing I should just do whatever they need and we actually also think so much about what other people are thinking. Oh, yeah. And other people's head, assuming their thoughts. We don't know what they're thinking. We really overthink what they are thinking all the time. They get used to it. Because I remember at the beginning of this journey, also with my children, learning to say no, because they would just suck me dry if they could. And I let them. So when I

started to say no, I remember, especially my older kids were like, what? What do you mean no? You know, like, I'm like, yeah, it's a new thing I'm doing. I'm telling you no. And eventually they catch on because when you change everything around you changes. I did learn really how to use boundaries. And I used to think that boundaries were about the other person and that's where it was wrong. I had to really understand that these boundaries were for me. No. And, you know, people that have a traumatic background have a really hard time with boundaries and, you know, it's have a traumatic background have a really hard time with boundaries. And, you know, it's just something that you have to take on and learn about them. And it's really, it's, it's kind of harder to learn.

And if you're not taught it when you're young and you're older, you know, it's one of those things that you go back in and re put them in, but they're just so super valuable. I forgot what the studies were, but school has not really changed in many, many years. And I don't have kids. So even though it is up to the parents, but there are some things that I think kids in schools would benefit from. And it would be like, like say if there was, there should be like a debate class or a conflict resolution class, because everything in our world is about conflict resolution, right? Or like how to deal with people, how to communicate, how come there isn't a class that says you're going to have to learn how to do

this because you can't run away and you can't block everybody. Right. Like soon there's not going to be anybody to block, you know, get one person mad and block, block, block, block, block. And now you've cut that all off. And then these kids are wondering like, well, who do I have?. And now you've cut that all off. And then these kids are wondering like, well, who do I have? And they feel lonely. Who do I go to? And they haven't, they haven't worked through the painful parts. They're learning about math that they'll never use in their life. Most of them, you know, history that's BS. I have a really big issue,

especially with my 11 year old every day. she has to watch the news in the morning. And not only does she have to watch it, but the questions that are the, I would say it's kind of like an inquiry that she has to do for questions are really to make sure that she heard all of these things and how she compare it with her personal life. So she really, truly has to listen to it and receive it. And I don't watch the news. Wait, is that a class assignment?

No, this is every morning for every kid in the school, starting in elementary school, all the way to high school. I have never heard that before. It's disturbing. I had to do it with her because she was homesick for a week. And I was like, you watch this every morning about like Biden and Zelensky and how much money.

This is also, okay, this is one-sided news. It is CNN news. Not that I have anything against anybody, but I'm just saying, I do know that it's one-sided over here and one-sided over there. That's brainwashing. Well, I would be very upset. Looking back, I mean, or, you know, there's also the stuff like, she was like so excited about science. She's in middle school and she was telling me all of these, you know, experiments they were doing. And then it came to Friday and she didn't want to go to school. I'm like, why? And she's like, because remember all that fun stuff I said about science. Now we have to take a test on it. Oh man. Yeah. I wasn't very good

student. I'm, I'm a better student now. And that's why I have the, my podcast liberated healer, but because I wanted to, I love learning and I realized I realized that I love learning, but I was not good at test taking. It caused a lot of anxiety for me. I had disabilities that people didn't realize, like dyslexia and things like that. And so I would have almost a panic attack at every test. But I look at everything as energy, right? I mean, I'm kind of trained in energy. Money is energy.

Yeah. Money is not just a piece of paper. It's an energy. And if you say to yourself, well, I can't have any of that kind of energy, you're not going to get any energy. So I look at it as all energy. And the classroom is all energy. So what her experience was to me was energy. It's like she was in the flow. She was learning. She was connecting herself and her soul was something that spoke to her, adjusting it and having a good time. And it was on the experience. And then a line in the sand came and then now went to a different energy, which didn't respond to her soul because her soul is saying, that's not what it's about.

And we wonder why so many kids are committing suicide. I mean, I can't tell you how many of my friends and my children's friends, I mean, as young as middle school. No, I know. I wrote a book called surviving suicidal ideation. That's coming out in June. I wrote it with a trauma therapist, Dr. Amelia Kelly. She was on my podcast and I just was like, something kept saying, ask her, ask her to write it with you. She said, yes, we wrote a book proposal. We sent it out. We got four offers, you know, she's published out there, but I wasn't at the time. And I went with the Swedenborg foundation because it's a nonprofit and they're going to donate books to anybody that needs it. So I wanted that because it's like,

you need it. You're going to get it. I don't, you don't have the money. Okay, fine. You get it. And that's, that's what I think this type of, we have to come from that place of whole assistance to our humanity and to the other people that are suffering. We can do so much better in so many different ways. And that's why people like you and I are out here every day hustling. This is not easy. This is, we are hustling for ourselves first, but for humanity, because we know we can do better. We have ample amount of energy in terms of money, but it's all going to the wrong places. Honestly, it really is. There shouldn't be any reason why there is a homeless person in America. There's no reason for a kid to go hungry in America. It just blows my mind that that actually happened. But if we start to look at it all as energy,

right? But yes, they're becoming so suicidal. They're disconnected. So I wrote this book. There's safety plans in it. There's meditations, there's exercises. So she speaks through it through a therapeutic side, which I think is great because I'm a lived experience and I've healed it myself. And I healed it mostly, mostly from my spirituality and from me connecting to my spirit and my soul and seeing how beautiful my soul is and these kids need to see that spark in them or people or anybody they need to see that spark in you their soul is so beautiful like niagara falls is so beautiful or the seven wonders of the world or a bear or a polar bear there's something that just speaks to you go oh my gosh that's so beautiful you are just as beautiful as that inside

and we all have a not just our fame prints are unique but our soul is unique flows uniquely it sounds unique it moves and it's with you and what's happening to a lot of these people are they're not connected to that soul anymore. They have, they feel like there's like a, a layer cutting you off. And so you, now you have this physical body and spirit like here, and then your soul's way over there and you're disconnected. And that's where the real depression comes in when you're not connected to your spirit. But the therapeutic side is, is when you have trauma or you're really stuck in that programming. That's why she talks about, you know, a childhood abuse or the triggers and things like that. If you need therapy, go get therapy, whatever you need to get back to that

soul, do it. And you'll know. And all you have to do is say, is this resonating with me? Is this therapist resonating with me? No, try another one. If they try to put you on medication and that doesn't vibrate with you or resonate with you, just say no and try someone else. I went to Christian churches. I mean, I literally went to all of them and I took a little bit of everything that spoke to me. Physical is my, for me, yoga. So you have to make your own recipe because you are the only one that knows what resonates with you. And that's why I started the Liberated Healer. And it's not, I'm not the Liberated Healer.

I liberated it in myself, but everyone can be their own healer, their own healer to get to liberation. Liberation is a great word. It's that that's a high vibrational energy word, right? You are liberate. You are free. You want to get free. You want to fly. You want to get free from your pain. You want to get free from the things that are keeping you stuck. You don't have to be stuck. And that's, I guess, the continual message. And you're not alone. You're never alone. Loneliness is a very real thing, especially here in America. I mean, with elderly and part of us are never alone because we have our spirit guides and we have, but we are as a society lonely. And I think when I was a kid and I would see

like people in convalescent hospitals and the elderly, I just should break my heart. We've lost our tribe. When you start on this journey, you will say, for example, kids are spending six to nine hours a day on their phone. And then they're wondering why they're sad or suicidal. Right. Can you take one of those hours and read a book to an elderly person that doesn't have any family left, that kid would be like, I actually did something nice for someone today. And they would feel great inside, right? They're not being guided to do those kinds of things. It's true. Cause service work is so healing for a person. I did it when I was really bad. I'll just share. I bought my house when I was really young. I was proud of. I bought my house when I was really young.

I was proud of myself. And I had my house for 20 something years. I'd gone through the divorce. I was sad. I was suicidal. And I was like, you know, when I have all this equity in the house, I don't want to die with all this money. Just I worked hard for it.

I'm going to sell my house and I'm just going to, I'm going to give it to people. And that's how suicidal I was. I was going to sell my house, take out the equity. And I did, I went, I rented a fancy place in Hollywood Hills. I gave my friends that needed money, money. I wrote checks, crazy. I could use that money now, but, but I didn't care. And that's a good sign for someone suicidal when they're giving away their things or their belongings, because we're not taught to talk about suicide. And that's another reason why I started Suicidal Ideation Anonymous, which is going to act a lot like AA, because people don't want to share it because they're afraid of their future

and explaining. They're afraid they're going to get locked up. But I sold everything and I was renting and I was just going to blow it all. And I started, I love animals. So I went in, volunteered at an animal shelter and I had all this money in the bank and I'm sitting there picking up dog poop and walking them and cleaning all these animals that had nowhere to go and nobody to love them. And I literally, I feel like crying now. It's just like, cause I literally could feel my energy shifting

as I went into helping another thing that needed somebody. And I went, what are you doing? Oh my God, you can still help something. You're helping this dog right now. And part of my journey is like, okay, you got this. Okay. What are you going to do now? How are you going to fix this? And then, you know, but if you have nothing, go and volunteer. If you, if you don't like people, a lot of people don't like people anymore, go to an animal shelter and volunteer once a week.

It'll change you within a few days. And you see abused and beaten and you just have to go to wherever the charity is in your heart. And you realize how charitable, how good you are and how much your action is valuable in this world. Because that's because we've got to just constantly tell ourselves about our value. Yeah. And when you do charity work, it does show your value. So it's funny when I tell people I like humans, people go, you do.

I like humans. Ask somebody that or tell somebody that. I know. I don't like humans. You know, I know. We need to somebody that. I know. I don't like humans. I know. We need to change that. But it's because they've been hurt by humans. Or they've seen the hurt around the world.

Yeah, which I couldn't when I was little. We didn't have stuff like that. You couldn't see what was going on in the world. You know, so you had to either watch it on the news, one time on the news, whenever the news was at 5 o'clock, or you had to read it in a newspaper. It has changed because they can constantly see what's happening around the world, and it's devastating. And so if you're watching it all the time, it does make you really disappointed in humanity. I mean, killing each other's children will never ever solve a country's problem. And if you become passionate about a thing that you don't want to see, you've got to find positive

ways to support that cause. We have an online civil war happening. That actually does not help anybody because everybody is right in their righteousness, throwing their righteousness on top of you. I know I studied, I learned, I looked it up. I know what's going on. What you're actually doing is you are taking all of that energy of when you were building up, like in your research, and you're just looking for anyone to dump it on. You're dumping it on that one person.

And that might be the last thing that person can take. Within our conversation in this podcast, every 11 minutes, a person commits suicide. How many people have we lost in the time in this podcast? Do you want to be that person that was the last thing that they could have taken. That's what I think of every single time when I get angry about something I see online. And then I say, do I want to post something? Nope. I'm going to go do something healthier in my community or in my circle or for me today, instead of dump on that person, because I know I'm right about something. And we, the more we can just say, no, please no more of this stuff on bashing on each other.

You're not going to change that person's mind that way. So if that works, I would say maybe something different. Like if it actually, like, I don't know if it actually, that debate actually came to a resolution. I would say,

well, it works. It's not working. Well, it's almost like a mother. Think about it. I think about my four children. They're all so fricking different, right? You know, one's vax, one's not, one's Democrat, one's not, you know, one likes this, one doesn't, you know, I mean, they're all so different, but I still love them. Of course. You know, I still treat them the same. I mean, I'd agree with their beliefs or their ideas or whatever, but I still support them. That's all we have to do is we can support each other.

We're more connected than we ever know to the people that you consider you hate them. You're actually connected to them. You're actually a part of them. We're all connected. Like you said, living more with your heart than your mind. Exactly. Going back to the we're in our mind too much, not in our heart. Because when you're in your heart space, you wouldn't be a online Civil War person.

And that's what's happening. Divided states of America is what we have here at home. We really are only hurting ourselves. Like I said, you might be that person's last line that they can't take it. If we start to look at it a little bit like that, then you say, no, I'm not going to contribute to that. No. If you, if you really believe in your like say a candidate for politics, then go volunteer for that candidate and do official stuff that I'm just, I'm not saying don't believe in what you believe in or support what you support in, but find healthier ways to support your ideology.

I got so berated by a family member saying that I don't read enough. I don't understand enough what's going on in X, Y, and Z. I'm stupid. And it's simply, they can't understand, you know? And I just was like, what? And he's like, you live in Vegas. I don't think you understand what's really going on in the Middle East. I mean, I honestly couldn't see the correlation of this person who really had this strong conviction and has never had to live that kind of. I don't know. I've never had to live that kind of life. I can't. How can I speak about that? I can speak about my, what my

experiences are and that's what I'm focused on. And I'm trying to share it to see if it helps another person who's going through it, but I'm not going to all of a sudden jump into that. I'm going to really not saying I can't hold some context, but I'm not going to be a champion for that for the whole day on my computer. But there are people that are jumping in on the, on that find healthier ways to support your vision or what you believe in, whether, you know, join that campaign,

it'll give you a call log. You can actually call people you can do, but you got to do it in healthier ways. I think that oftentimes the energy of the outside is running them. Like they're not choosing consciously, where am I going to put my energy today? Like they're being controlled by the outside energy. Well, the problem with it is,

is that if you look at everything as a stream of energy, like a river, right? So where are you going to dip your toe into? Because what happens is you dip your toe into? Cause what happens is you dip your toe into it and then it takes you. And so now you're in the energy of all of that. Yeah. All of it, everything that they are and you've become a part of it. Now you're holding it. You're actually building karma with it. You actually are building karma that you're going to carry and you're going to give them to your family. You better make sure that you want to dip your toe in that river.

Right. Because there's not actually a single river stream that is not fallible. Right. And it's a very controlling energy. And this could be for good and bad. You know, you could go, you know, think that you're doing the good things. And all of a sudden that's controlling your life, that one thing. And you no longer have the space for love, you know, because you're just so overwhelmed with doing, doing, doing.

I mean, you could really get caught up in even doing good things is what I'm saying. So for me, I think of it almost like a jar of jar of energy. And where am I going to put my little nuggets today of the energy so that, and also what are you going to keep for yourself by the end of the day or in the morning? Yes. You know, we could just do so much, but we are, we are just so magical. We are so beautiful. Every single one of us is so magical. We come together. We really can do me. Look what we have actually accomplished in the last couple of hundred years. Isn't it's beautiful. It's wonderful. It's created a really great place. We can do so much better. Let's, you know, we just have to figure out ways, healthier ways to support one another and we have to we have to take care of

old people we have to we have to take care of we have to protect our children i mean children is the number one energetically thing if you hurt a child is the worst thing you can do energetically you know and there are a lot of shifty stuff happening and that is starting to come out and that is a that is a part of what god energy or source energy like should put a shiny shining light on that stuff yeah but as a society got to protect the children 100 not a single child in this world should not be protected and ever get violated. That is a representative of humanity.

And I had heard one in, I think it was one in three, one in three have been sexually assaulted, but I just looked at that and I was like, okay, I have four kids, five. I actually have a stepdaughter too. I'm so I'm like, this is crazy to me. Yeah. But that's an energy. Going back to what your gloss is, that's energy. And so we have to do that. We have to help the elderly people. We have to get out of celebrity worshiping. It's not helping anybody. Putting them on a pedest, like they're gods and things like that. It's like, and where they're all, we're following every single thing they do. And we buy everything

that they say that we need. And my, the documentary I'm raising funds for, and I'm have a lot of interests. I'm hoping the documentary will get to get, I'm raising half a million dollars for it right now. We're talking about the social issues because it also seems to be lending to mass shootings because mass shooters are suicidal, obviously. Right. And then they become homicidal. So we have to start looking at this. Why are they suicidal? Why are they, why are they so angry and suicidal that they want to result to that. Social pressures and then not getting there, you know, and seeing in self-pity and self-worth, you know, social media has good things and bad things,

but, you know, breaking it down. I love art. Art is great. I'm an artist. You know, let's celebrate art. Let's celebrate photography and art and movies. Still, it's fine. But everybody told me I was an artist.

Every single person. I used to work at the studios and they would say you're a business person not a creative person all the time and so I would say okay I'm not a creative person I mean when you actually listen we listen to everything that people say especially when it's repeatedly being yelled at us so I would do my doodles and then I and then every once in a while like somebody would say that's art and i was like no it's just a doodle no that's art no it's just a doodle i would play this over and over again i have 30 images in the book now that i illustrated that's going to be published that's insane that i've been able to go that's jumping a whole that's jumping a giant mountain or wave you know

I finally got the got that negativity out of my mind and I would buy the paper and be afraid to make the paper ugly you want to know what my daughter does she's an artist she's 11 she is such a good artist probably one of the best artists i know and you should see her work at school it's stick figures for a nice like why because she would rather do that than stand out she doesn't like the focus and the spotlight on her and so she she actually intentionally makes herself small. Yeah. I did that too because people always would tell me I was a dingy blonde.

And because I was kind of cute when I was younger. You know what I mean? I'm going to be 54 next week, so I'm older now. But when I was like in my 20s and trying to achieve things and I really wanted to learn you know they literally put me in that box and say oh you know you're just a cute blonde you know and I literally would be like okay I guess that's okay you know actually that's why being a published author and anybody who knows me it's like I want to well up in tears right now because it's like I wanted more for myself so badly I wanted to be a writer so bad and everybody told me I couldn't everybody told me

that when I believe them when everybody's telling you that you believe them you know they're like oh you're just some cute you're a cute blonde go get a husband you know go get a you know and I had one of those and and then you know you know and all I did was take care of him and help him with his career and then when he you know started making a lot of money and he was in a band called Flogging Molly they're like an Irish a really famous Irish band now and and I worked all on his career and, you know, and then as soon as he started making a lot of money, he left. So it was like, well, that wasn't working out very well. So you do have to just really work on yourself and tune all that stuff out. But I kept myself so small. Yeah. You know, I just started to believe everything they,

they would put me into, you know, I got sexually assaulted at, at work at a Christmas and really bad. I wound up having to do a case because they were like, well, what, what's wrong? They were being really threatening with me, you know, wanting me to sign something, all this stuff. And I got scared and I was actually in the middle of a divorce. So my we did you know we we started a case and the the mediator was a trial and was all these men around me my attorneys their attorneys the mediator all men and the mediator was an older guy a trial attorney and he said Gina he said you're too pretty a jury will never believe you and I had all these people telling me that I wasn't going to have been believed. And I just signed away.

And I just said, okay. And I left. But I wanted to stand up for myself because I was completely violated. Because it actually ruined my career. Because it got out and everybody judged me and said that I deserved it or whatever. The whole company went against me. And I stayed there for an entire year to the point where people wouldn't work with me on my projects and things like that. And I'm thinking about that

because it can get that, you know, it can get really that bad where they would just say, oh, you're not going to believe you, Gina. And what I'm looking at a room full of men, older men, I've been, I'm vulnerable. I was sexually violated. My career is on the line. I'm going through a divorce, really emotional. I was very suicidal at that time, extremely suicidal. And they're just telling me, don't worry. You know, you can't go. My own attorney is telling me I don't have a case because I'm too the jury won't believe me they're like literally told me if you were like just this neat girl you would be believable but you're just too outgoing you're you're like they're never you're too pretty they're never gonna believe that this could happen to you and so I said okay and I settled and it was for nothing

and I had already lost my job and my career. So I had to completely start. And I was blackballed in the industry for a couple of years. I literally could not, I would get hired and then they'd find out about the case. And then they would call me up on that Monday, on the day I was supposed to start and say, we changed our mind. Like it was hard. And if we want people to not want to check themselves out of this world, I mean, we got to change a lot of things.

I do appreciate the Me Too movement because that's actually opened up some of those doors like Harvey Weinstein. Everybody knew what was going on with that guy. Well, if everybody knows and nobody does anything, that's the problem with this world. We just have, we just turn the cheek, you know, and this is just pretend we don't see it.

And then we don't have to worry about it. Well, it's scary because they will take you down. They, you know, the month, the power, but we are actually stronger together. If we all came together and went against the powerful people that would ruin our life. Like, yeah, these people had money that was coming after me. Right. Right. And I didn't have anything at the time.

So, yeah. And I was shamed a lot of times that I didn't fight hard enough to, you know what I mean? Then. So I had the real shame and then I had the shame for not fighting for myself. I was literally too broken.

I didn't have anybody on my side, but if all of us, me, you, everybody, all these people just put the line and stand to say absolutely no no more no more we are not a going to be abusive online to other people we're not going to we're going to protect our children if we hear anything that happens we're going to protect elderly we're going to protect their you know if we all stand up a lot more we can really achieve great things

together we have to yeah time is here and is now because you know what when you think about energy which is more powerful i mean the light will over over power that darkness and we're getting assistance now more than ever on the light side. And it's because people, podcasts are great because we are finding a voice outside of traditional media. Yeah. I'm so grateful that we have that now. I know. But think about it. We really didn't have that before.

And we were literally being conditioned in one way or another. We can really influence people in a positive way that they couldn't really do before. I mean, and women are sharing their stories. The power in sharing your story. And from the other end who is listening, the people who just listen to you share that story, Gina. There's so much power in that. And that's why there's caveman drawings. You know, we tell through story. We're visual creatures. And that's why there's caveman drawings you know we tell through story

we're visual creatures and that's great you know we we have to just know who we are you know where these humans are so interesting and beautiful you know just stories can help other people like that's why you know i just i love storytelling you know and it's very powerful everybody knows it's powerful we just have to create more positive content and i would also say you know some of the stories that have been told were told also to keep us small so to re-look at some of the things that we've been told and find your own story within it. You know, when I think about like the cave, you know, in Plato or Adam and Eve, you know, all of those stories, you know, I mean, you can see from a different perspective

if you are living a liberated life. Yeah, absolutely. I just want to send a shout out to anybody who's suffering with any type of suicidal ideation. And yes, you know, it's really scary. I get a lot of letters now almost daily from someone either has thought about it or have had people, you know, so I have to constantly be into this position of what do I say? How do I how do I respond to to these conversations? And I, I instantly go to the a few memories of mine where I was very close to leaving this world. And so I can truly understand, like that moment. All I can say is that you have a purpose here. Please stay. I like Jordan Peterson and I'm not a doctor. So I listened to him when he speaks because he's qualified and he says, just wait one more day. Can you just hold on one more day? And I think that's great advice because usually the next day, the energy does change and you can get out of it. So whatever you need to do to just wait one more day, get through a sleep cycle and then put a plan in place. Also in our book, we have a safety plan where you can write people that you can call, you know, we do a safety plan, do things that better help yourself. Some people can't meditate

when you're in it. That's why I use the visuals. Then look at a piece of art. You know, there's other put on music. I actually, I have an i-helm next to my bed that is playing ocean sounds or meditation music almost 24-7 because I have PTSD. And I don't even realize it that, oh, wow, I'm feeling really good in the night. I'll hear, oh, that's a pretty sound. There are things. So please find whatever that is. I don't even realize it that, oh, wow, I'm feeling really good in the night. I'll hear, oh, that's a pretty sound. Oh, yeah. There are things.

So please find whatever that is. Bring in your soul team or your tribe and say, I'm suffering right now. Can I put you on my safety call list? You know what I mean? And we have to try to avoid judging and criticizing other people. When you do that, imagine pancake batter, right? Like that sticky stuff. You're taking a ball of it and you're throwing it on that person's energy. When you are throwing online stuff or judgments or criticism, you are actually throwing it on that

person. You are doing that to other people too. We need to go back, you know, quit judging people. So you don't know what they're going through. You don't know what their whole story is. And even if, even if they are terrible person, let God figure it out. Let the light figure it out. It's not your thing to judge. They are going to judge themselves harder than you could ever judge them. Let it go. Stop it. Go do something positive with your energy. That's going to help you and them and everyone else in the world. And the more that we do that for each other, all boats rise with the tide.

It's true. We're all going to go up and live better lives. And we're going to see the suicide rates go down instead of up well but definitely with what you are trying to put out there and that you are you know putting out there you're authoring your book and your podcast and just congratulations and thank you so much for for healing it is each of our responsibility to do the work to heal. I feel the liberation from you, Gina. Yeah. I do love myself now. I never did before. I didn't know that you could love yourself. I do. I love myself so much. I'm like, gosh, you love yourself, don't you? I do.

It's funny. I never thought you could do that. You actually can. Well, you're beautiful. Yeah, I love it. I'm so thankful that you've spent this time with me. But thank you so much for coming on. Tell everybody where they can find you, where they can find your book. Okay. TheLiberatedHealer.com. Everything's on there. I'm also on Instagram and Facebook. The book is Surviving Suicidal Ideation. It's coming out June 5th. You can pre-order it now on Amazon and Barnes and Noble. My second book is called The Dark Side of the Rose, a handbook for the living. And it's going to talk about this stuff on the spiritual side a little bit more about like what happens contractually, you know, what happens energetically

and things like that. I'm going to be doing a college and high school tour to talk to kids, hopefully to connect with them a little bit more to spread the message. I'm actually raising funds for a documentary and I got the director and I got a lot of important people talking. And so that's going to be really interesting. So I'm just putting out the vibes with that and then trying to get a grant for Suicidal Ideation Anonymous, places that would act just like AA, places for people to go where they can start to build a tribe and not be ashamed of the thoughts that are going on in their mind. There's billions of dollars going to mental health in the country. And I don't know where it's going because 988 is just not super successful. 75%

of people said they will never call 988 again after they did the first time. But there's a lot of money going somewhere. We get, we just got to do, we could do better. There's a lot of money. We just got to make sure it's getting to the right people that need it. Well, I love you dearly. You're a beautiful soul. I'm so glad to have met you. Keep in touch. Okay. Thanks for having me. Bye. Thanks for listening to Sense of Soul Podcast. And thanks to our special guests for joining me. If you want more of Sense of Soul, check out my website at www.mysenseofsoul.com, where you can work with me one-on-one or help support Sons of Soul Podcast

by donating to my coffee fund. Thanks for listening.