Sex, Lies & DM Slides - 85. Men vs. Women Female STEREOTYPES

Episode Date: June 3, 2024

We’ve all come across certain types in our dating lives right? From the bad boy, to spending time with “mr.unavailable” or the classic ‘man child’, we take a look at ALL the common stereotypes in men when on the dating scene. Plus we look at some of the stereotypes that women tend to fall under in the dating world as well. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

let's go hi everyone and welcome back to another episode of sex slides and dm slides with me saffron barker and me anastasia kingsnorth so we are back for another week and back for another opportunity to deep dive into all things sex and relationships first of all how are you i know it's very fucking early where you are it is very early and. I'm good. Aside from the fact that my mum's actually leaving LA today. So from this point onwards, I'm going to be by myself for a month. And I think when someone's been here and now they're going, it's going to feel really strange for me. And also I kind of thought I was going to meet a lot more friends than I have since I've been out here not that i've gone on my way to but i don't really know how to but i feel like you probably haven't done that because your mum's still been there whereas like now you're going to be in a

position where you are on your own you're going to have to go out and try and meet people but you know what i mean in what opportunity am i going to do you know i mean i don't know maybe at the gym you meet people but at the gym babe at the gym you're gonna be nice no you're gonna be meeting famous rappers smoking weed at the gym exactly and maybe not if a guy comes up to me i'm not taking it as oh they're trying to be nice and friends there's a different intention there i i don't know i saw this tiktok you know and it was of a girl in this is when i was in la and i was searching for bars that we could go to and this girl did like best bars to go to if you want to sit on your own and make friends which i don't know if you really want to go to a bar on your own but they must just be like really sociable places i guess yeah but again i can't imagine

girls coming i can just imagine guys coming over to me I can more imagine it but just like not in LA like I can't imagine somebody in LA being like oh hi you're on your own are you okay like if I was in Australia I can completely imagine that happening but really okay yeah but in LA I don't I don't know maybe prove me wrong maybe go to one of these bars I don't know if I'm gonna go to a bar by myself but maybe I'll go to workout classes maybe I'll meet people there that have the same sort of interests it doesn't yeah I might do something like that I think that will happen if anyone has any tips for me this time please do let me know for making friends yeah because I've met some people in my acting class who were just lovely but it's kind of that how do you become friends

outside of the acting class it's very strict you can't talk that much is there anyone you've taken a liking to that you could be like oh would you want to go and grab lunch yeah but I haven't so yes maybe I need to it was the pause yeah no no there is everyone's actually lovely but it's just that oh i don't know yeah i've got to do it haven't i you've got to do it i've got to do that i feel like you're getting good at putting yourself in uncomfortable positions that's true nothing could be harder than what i've done so yeah no nothing could be harder than that so making a new friend can be easy compared to some of that okay guys i'm gonna i'm gonna channel this i'm gonna take this with me i'm not gonna be so nervous when my mom leaves

today exactly and the new friend can come on the podcast next week yeah why not well you how are you since your tonsillitis anyways um well i'm feeling a lot better than what I was. I went to Girls Loud last night, which was very fun. I'm going again tonight. Wow. Love myself with Cheryl Cole. I would love to see Cheryl Cole. I just love her.

She's looking good. To be fair, all of them are looking good. She's always looked good. But she's got her hair. She did get the appreciation. But when I saw her in person i remember thinking you were one of the most beautiful people i've ever seen in my life yeah tonight i'm gonna take my glasses because i didn't take my glasses last night so i was doing a very much ariana grande

squint looking down like where is she um but she looked gorgeous from what i saw and i had like long hair and i thought oh yeah she is killing it so yeah i saw them last night which was fun did have a little drink which probably shouldn't have done um because we're going out this weekend for bank holiday but fuck it why not oh is it bank holiday this weekend it's bank holiday this weekend it's Freya's birthday so we're all out tomorrow there's like 30 of us out tomorrow um so that's gonna end great you know we're be dying on Sunday. Yep. Let's go. I'm going back to university for $0 delivery fee, up to 5% off orders and 5% Uber cash back on rides.

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Want more ways to follow your faves? Check out our new player prop tracking with real-time notifications. Or how about more ways to customize your casino page with our new favorite and recently played games tabs? And to top it all off, quick and secure withdrawals. Get more everything with FanDuel Sportsbook and Casino. Gambling problem? call 1-866-531-2600 visit connectsontario.ca for today's episode we thought that we would speak about stereotypes in girls and guys when it comes to dating um i feel like there's so so many um maybe more stereotypes in boys than girls

maybe not though but let's get right into it so first one we'll do the guy stereotypes the fuck boy the bad boy i feel like this is like the most like stereotype stereotype there can be yeah a hundred percent and how yeah should we actually explain what we think a fuck boy i mean it's kind of in the name it's pretty obvious but i mean it's kind of in the name a boy who is pretty obvious basically every single boy of the population boy we've ever fucking met is a fat boy yeah i've met a few nice boys but i feel like it's harder nowadays because in my mind i'm like everyone's just a fuck boy like i think i think bad of people now before i even get to know them because i'm just like oh it's gonna like i'm bad anyway yeah because normally it's the ones that you think are really

nice end up being the fucking worst yeah but the annoying thing is i think the reason we're so attracted to fuck boys is because it's like it's someone that we can't have in that set like i'm actually not i'm actually not genuinely had on my heart. I don't want, I go for the nice guys. Well, the ones that I think are really nice. Well, same.

It's not worked out very well for the both of us. Cause they're not fucking single. No, but a lot of people love, you know, actually do love fuck boys. If that makes sense. No,

they don't, but they do in the sense of, yeah, they find it attractive maybe because they can't have it or. like the chase and they like the game yeah they like the chase they like the game i hate all of that shit yeah it's the satisfaction of changing somebody like they want to be able to change that person they believe they can be the person to change them but as we've said a million times you cannot change someone it's until they want to change themselves but i think that is why some girls are so attracted to that because we just want what we can't have half of the time I know

I have fell foul to that before like I will always like even on dating apps if someone messages me back too quickly like I just sound so stupid because it's not a game but I'll be like oh it's a bit too like I don't know like I always want the person who doesn't reply see i get that i i am very much we all want we can't have but again i'm not like that if a guy took days to reply i think oh fuck that that's a good thing because i would probably after a couple of days i'd be sat there and be like right it's done now but i would sit there and think like oh i wonder why he hadn't replied now there was a guy on hinge who who I basically I matched him. And then I bumped.

Well, I didn't bump into him. We saw each other at a bar a couple of weekends ago. And I thought he was gorgeous. I was looking at him thinking, I really recognize you from somewhere. And then it clocked when I got home. I was like, oh, I've matched him on Hinge. And then we spoke for a bit on Hinge after. We were like, oh, yeah, we saw each other at the bar.

And he hasn't replied to my last message. I don't think he's going to gonna reply to me now and it bugged me for a couple of days because I was like oh I was really enjoying speaking to him yeah I mean I have been through I guess I've been through no I have been through that I completely understand what you're saying I just don't think I go for the stereo well yeah I always think I'm the nice guy then they end up being a fuck boys i don't know i don't know anyways i feel like we've all dated the very stereotypical fuck boy right we have um so classic fuck boy signs is for example he doesn't define the relationship he gives you mixed signals he'll go days without communicating and then pop up when you least expect it he'll tell you exactly what you want to hear etc okay okay yeah i i have experienced all

of this i feel like different people though honestly i. I don't think, okay, so this is where I think I differ in the sense of I love a nice guy. Genuinely, if a guy is taking weeks or sending me mixed signals, I genuinely just, that's me, I'm out. But that's so good though. That is so, like I am very much like that, but there's certain people that it will play on my

mind about but like yeah half the time i need to just be like no like if as soon as i get mixed signals no you're gone i'm worth better than that yeah because they just don't want you enough that's the way that i see it they don't want you enough if they're sending if they're sending you if you don't know where you stand or they're sending you mixed signals uh-huh i mean don't get me wrong sometimes people can genuinely be busy and I know it's like oh you're not too busy if you like someone that much but no if you don't if you haven't met someone you can be too busy you can be really busy of course yeah of course you can like yeah everyone's really like we can be really busy some days like we we could be doing the podcast

and not reply for three hours and then do something else not reply for you know and we get actually busy but yeah like when you do like someone like you will still put the effort in whereas like a fuck where for like just wouldn't like they just message like maybe once every couple of days just to let you know that they're still there but like and to like reassert their place in your life but then just like fuck off again for like however long i leave you thinking about it we're not having that guys we're not that's that that's on our 2024 out list for yes absolutely but then this is this is the fuck boys that i get is the ones that tell me all the things that i want to hear and this is where i think i go for the nice guy and then they end up being even a bigger fuck boy because it's all a load of shit see we get the opposite because I don't get fat boys telling me what I want to hear like I really don't I'm getting the you're my dream girl you're this you're that

I'm not getting these compliments I need these compliments in my life yeah but that's because you're still speaking to the ones that take three days to reply that is true that hit where it hurts i'm gonna stop doing that so i'm just one of the ones that cried replied you know i don't know yeah no that is what that is why that definitely is why okay so fuck boys out that is the first stereotype the second one is the soft boy which is the urban dictionaries um definition of this is a fuck boy but without the cocky attitude so the soft boy appears to be emotionally illiterate and is attuned to his and your feelings he replies promptly to texts listens carefully to all of your problems and genuinely seems like an

all-round good person okay this this is what i get i think that yeah i think that's more what you get rather than a fuck boy i think you get a soft boy yeah great i didn't even know that was a thing i think that's what i wouldn't you say that's honestly what i've always got one million percent that is what you've always had like a hundred percent see when i first read soft boy i thought that was going to be like a nice boy but like it's i guess it is but like on paper but then they're not deep down like you uncover the layers and you're like oh shit yeah that's giving me honest i think i'd rather just the straight up fuck boy because at least he's being fucking straight up about it honestly the soft boy is so would i too yeah it's just two faces it's taking you into a spiral it's taking

you into a massive big lie for somebody to not mean it or for somebody's actions not to match to that so honestly i'd rather a fuck boy than a soft boy okay how do you think then you can spot a soft boy i don't know i yeah you're not probably the best person to ask that question no i have experienced it firsthand too many times i don't i genuinely don't know like now when people are so nice to me because i don't know guys i don't i i just want to make it clear i don't think every guy's obsessed with me in any way whatsoever but the guys i speak to isn't that's just what i experience no they are though but honestly i've never seen i've never experienced really anything like it properly but like it's every guy like it's every guy every guy the ones i know yeah every guy like it's every guy every guy the ones no yeah every guy you speak to yeah yeah so

when they're being that obsessed and saying all these compliments all of these things i don't i don't know like now somebody's too nice to me i don't know what to do this just do you not think though it just makes dating fucking impossible because how do you spot anything nowadays there's a term for everything there's a term for every type of person so you're gonna you're gonna literally like dissect a person like you're a fuck boy you're a soft boy you're this you're that like no i'm like ever going to find just a nice boyfriend it's funny actually because i was having a conversation with my friends the other day when we're out for dinner and I was saying to them you know if somebody's too nice to me now I'm I'm not even going to believe what they're saying and they were like Saffron you've always believed in this fairy tale we don't think you should stop believing in it because that's you you're just a

very loving person you've always dreamt of that don't don't let other people not make you believe in that because there are some people out there who are still like that and when I heard it I thought no that is really true but on the other hand I remember meeting this girl and she had said to me if a guy is obsessed with you straight away it's weird because a guy shouldn't be they shouldn't be and that's a great thing because they should have their own life their own things going on that they don't need somebody else to not like almost make their life better but they don't need somebody else because they they're very much good on their own and that means if you guys do end up getting together you'll be you'll be so much better together because that person will have their own thing going on doing their own thing yeah yeah I'm not wording it very well but anyways long story short she was saying

I need to stop saying long story short because I never give a long story short but she was basically saying it's a really good thing if a guy isn't obsessed with you because they shouldn't be and it did actually make me look at things very differently I've never thought about it in that way before and it makes complete sense what you're saying because that is what i've kind of always wanted like and i always believe in a relationship i want my partner to have a separate thing me to have a separate thing and then we can eventually join together and that's how it works and like that makes so much sense because if they become too obsessed with you in the beginning do i want that i don't i don't know i don't know i've not experienced that so i'm not

sure see i don't think it's not that i want that i think just when i listened to her opinion i thought maybe it's not a bad thing if they're not that i don't know actually she was saying it was a bad thing she was saying that's not a good sign because I was always saying that I fall for the people that are so obsessive and so nice and then eventually their actions don't meet meet their words or match their words so she was saying well don't go for that because that's actually not a good thing I don't know I'm still stuck in two ways because there are some people like I don't want to say this as well and make people lose hope because there are people out there who are amazing, aren't fuckboys,

aren't softboys, that genuinely are great people that might fall in love with you straight away because that's their personality. They're just somebody that has a lot of love to give. So, you know, don't want people to lose hope here.

I can even look at my brothers and they're very much like that. I know for a fact my brothers fell in love with their girlfriends honestly straight away it wasn't like a growing thing both of them fell in love with him straight away and yeah and like I was reading our podcast comments this morning and it was about when people were getting engaged and it was really nice to see because everyone said at a completely different time scale. There was not one comment on that thing, on the post, that said the same thing. And I was like, yeah, it's so true. Every story is so individual.

And every person is so different. And there is no wrong and right. Now, we can sit here and say, oh, yeah, if they're obsessed with you in the beginning that's not good but then some of these comments like I got engaged in two months we've been together 20 years so like you can't say anymore like this is wrong this is right because it's going to be so individual what works for you at the time it's just I think there's so many opinions and so many stereotypes which what we're talking about today that makes it a lot harder for us to be able to believe that and to trust that if it was to happen for us like for us now because of how much we've spoken about it if that was to happen to me and I met somebody within two

weeks they proposed to me I'd be like oh no you can't do that do you know what I mean you're too nice you're not nice enough you're too nice you're not nice enough I'm not sure this is too quick but it might be too fast I don't know like there's no right or wrong way to feel anymore no it's very true but i think it's good to talk about it so you can look out for the warning signs because there definitely will be things that we would have missed because you know i'm a pro at spotting them now well yeah like yeah to be fair i i say actually that people have been too nice there's been flags that i've i've chose to ignore so yeah now i won't do that exactly but then because they'd be so nice it would i it would counteract for oh i know that's really bad what they've done but then they were so nice and that's why i would always see it before whereas now i'm not doing that exactly now i'm

not doing that okay the next one the man child peter pan syndrome i've heard of this well yeah i've heard of man child as well but also peter pan syndrome okay so peter pan syndrome is a pop psychology term to describe adults who display traits associated with immaturity irresponsibility and avoidance of adult responsibilities that is what david tozool a psychologist said so yeah like that yeah man child which no i can't be also deemed as a fuck it could be seen as a fuck boy could be seen as everything i don't want a man-child i want i absolutely not want a man-child fuck child did you just say we're mixing them together oh my god i heard it in my ear as you said fuck child i was like oh we're mixing them both together that's our new term that we can we don't want to fuck child okay so examples of this include neglecting to pay bills to make

significant impulsive changes like getting a new job without considering any potential consequences or they can deflect from any kind of responsibility lack ambition and don't strive for achievement which for me is like a very very very big turn off like I don't care what someone wants to do with their life whether they want to work in Tesco whether they want to be the biggest CEO in the world or they want to be a singer but as long as they have like ambition in their job of what they want to do that is all I care about so like if I was a man child who didn't give a shit I would hate that because I feel like me yeah to me we have so much ambition so I feel like we need to meet our match in that yeah I think if somebody didn't strive like you said it can genuinely be

anything but they don't strive for something i personally would find it so unattractive yeah me too so unattractive yeah me too there's some other examples as well of there's also an imbalance when it comes to sharing household chores planning dates or initiating important conversations i mean all of it's just not it for me i mean even i don't know i mean the date thing's a huge no-no for me oh what like like if we had to plan the dates or they weren't planning the dates yeah if they weren't ever planning dates and we always had to do it no oh yeah i wouldn't be doing that i would that yeah that to me is definition of a man no if you're a man you'd show up and you'd do that you would so we're not settling for any less we're not I don't know if I've dated a man child before I don't think I have like I probably I don't think I have but yeah I don't think we've had to experience that just yet hopefully that's

one that we don't experience no I definitely haven't one of my friends actually she had a long-term boyfriend who was lovely and he definitely wasn't a man child because he did strive for a lot he had a lot of ambitions however he never ever planned dates and she planned all of them and I it's funny because that was actually one of the turning points for her that put her off him she was like they've been together for years but she was like i just can't deal with the fact that he never books anything or does anything like he was lovely to her lovely never did anything wrong but also never ever went above and beyond you know and yeah and I feel like we just we want that in somebody and I understand yeah as girls it makes you feel special

it does and I think like I understand everybody has different love languages and people have different ways of showing people that they love them but like for me like if a guy was to book a date or like say to me like I'll be outside your house at seven let's go here to me that'd be like oh he likes me like he's putting time and effort into something that he's planned for me like i really like that to me that would be a really attractive thing and i say because we're girls but guys the same guys like it too everyone likes everyone likes that guys are the exact same i see sometimes have you seen on tiktok when um girls buy their boyfriend flowers no and like some of the boys reactions are the sweetest thing in the world because like a lot of the time you just wouldn't buy your boyfriend flowers i don't know it's just

very a stare again stereotypically a thing for a guy to do for a girl but some of the boys reactions were so sweet because they'd never been bought flowers before and it's i know it sounds like a bit of an odd thing but like it was honestly the sweetest thing in the world like having oh i want to watch that but you know what every guy i've been with have always been like why are you so because i love flowers i absolutely love flowers same and every guy i've ever been with has always said, I don't get it.

Why do you like flowers so much? Why do you like flowers? So I think if I bought any of my ex's flowers, they would have been like, uh, you can have them, but maybe they'd still

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It's happening now at BHP, a future resources company. To discover how, visit bhp.com slash better future. Let's go. Okay, the next one. Oh, Mr. Unavailable, aka. Aka the busy man.

You date someone who is constantly too busy to see you, but continues to message you, giving you false hope, when really he doesn't want to be with you okay have you ever dated someone like this i i don't think i've dated somebody like this i've definitely spoken to people who have been very much like this they're very much like all talk no action but yeah whether they're busy or not I don't know I don't think they're busy I think they're just being a dickhead have you dated somebody like that I don't yeah like you said I definitely haven't dated somebody like that but I've definitely spoke to people like that again I'm kind of just out very quickly I think that's one thing I am good at seeing the signs of is like you said somebody can genuinely be busy and maybe one week

you know somebody's just way too busy but if it's a continuous thing that's a that's a clear sign to me I don't want to have to chase someone just like I don't want someone to have to chase me I just don't I personally just don't enjoy it whatsoever I don't enjoy the game so for me yeah I've definitely spoken to people like this but I'm very much out also I'm very much a spontaneous person and that that is I'm very aware that's because I'm fortunate and lucky enough to be but if somebody said let's do something tomorrow I'd be like yeah fuck it let's go but that's just my attitude and also again very fortunate in the position that I'm in that I'm able to do that

but that's just kind of my personality trait and also when I speak to people that I know could also do that and they don't I just think wow do you really want to see me or it's different if somebody again is genuinely so busy but I do think those signs are very easy to see easier than when you're comparing it to something like the soft boy because you're getting so many good signs how do you believe it whereas this there's blatantly are not good signs so it's this there's blatantly a not good sign so it's you know you're kind of a lot easier to spot yeah i completely agree okay the last one for a guy before we go on to the girl stereotypes is the one who is perfect on paper so this guy treats you super well takes you on lovely dates and you have a lot in common with him so on paper he's perfect but you just don't feel that spark with him and

some things he does gives you the ick um I would say I have experienced this like I definitely yeah I would have experienced finding like an amazing guy and like I so wish that i could like them in the way that like i like a fuck boy but i just can't um so i have definitely experienced the one who's perfect on paper but that's not their problem that's a me problem i just didn't like them like there just was wasn't something there or yeah and like because i like if you can get the ick from somebody you don't like them like it could when you're in a relationship with someone and you love them so if you can get the ick from somebody you don't like them like it could when you're in a relationship with someone and you love them so much you can't get the ick that's what they say like you just physically can't about anything whereas with this like the guy's perfect

that you can't either yeah but whereas with this like the guy's perfect but you can like still find little icks i feel like i'd find the icks an excuse to be like, oh no, I can't. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, I get that. I feel like I would have experienced, I definitely have experienced that at some point in my life. I don't think any time recently that I can remember, but I do think that's something we all would have been through,

that we've thought to ourselves, oh, I mean, there's people, sometimes there's people that I'm like i wish i liked them because that would have been but yeah so i guess that is yeah i wish i would like them because they're perfect but i just don't but you just don't yeah but i don't know if it's such an icky thing for me i think there's just something that's not there or i don't find them attractive in some way rather than do you think it's possible to push past it like an ick yes to say that if the guy was perfect on paper but there was just like a little icky thing like do you think there's possible that you can push and end up liking that person or do you think like what do you know you know i don't think so

i think if you've got it in your head there's no way you can get that out of your head i just it no i personally don't think so it's hard to get out of your head and i think like i think it's annoying because that guy who's perfect on paper he'll probably be perfect for you when you've finished emotionally maturing in a sense of like you're probably still so used to fuck boys you're not ready for a night like the perfect boy to settle down with yet so like it could work but not until you're ready and that's not fair to make them wait so I don't think it could work like immediately but I think once you've like done some emotional maturing then potentially um but yeah that I definitely have dated like a perfect on paper guy who like hasn't worked out okay the girl stereotypes this one is the cool girl so the cool girl plays it cool treats a mean keeps them keen doesn't

reply straight away be's distant is plays like hard to get um and they're the rules you need to follow in order to be like the cool girl now i think that guys actually end up really liking the cool girl because they want the chase you can't have you want what you can't fucking have it's the same with the fuck boy like the cool girl just knows how to keep her cool like and i feel like i have been able to adapt that in certain circumstances but then in others like once i start liking someone i'm not that cool girl anymore that just goes out the window yeah i get what you're saying it's funny because i agree with what you said in the sense of i think a lot of guys do like that

because it's a chase however some guys i do think have but then you could say i'm probably the female version of this have too much of an ego that if somebody takes that that long then I will fuck them yeah it would take a very particular type of guy yeah it just depends what sort of guy you're talking to is yeah and it's funny because if you think of somebody that's like I don't know really high profile really successful again they're probably not used to girls being harder to get but at the same time they could have such an ego that they think fuck this it just yeah it just is so dependent isn't it yeah you're so right that with like the older guy like or like very successful guy like or like a singer

for example if they were to go to a club they think they could get any girl they wanted so then like if a girl probably could no they definitely could they definitely could like if a rapper went into a club they do and it's yeah like they definitely could but then like if there was a girl that they wanted that didn't want them like i think that yeah would it bug them or would it what make them want them more i don't know i think it's really just dependent on the person it's yeah it's so hard to say because it's not a stereotype we are all very different it's not a stereotypical thing but um I oh god I would like to think of myself as god this sounds so I was gonna no I was gonna ask you which one you think you were well I haven't read them all yet but I probably would think I'm the cool girl but not in genuinely not intentionally not thinking oh I've got to not

reply I just I'm not good at messaging anyone I'm genuinely not I'm awful at messaging anyone all my friends know this I'm the worst at replying I get caught up in my own things so it's not that I try and think oh I need to not reply I hate that but I just reply when I'm free to reply but because I'm just a very busy person I'm always doing things sometimes I reply I can be a day later but it's genuinely not intentional but then when I start like someone, I will drop anything to message that person. I'm not playing it cool. But I don't think, yeah, I think that's nice because I don't think you're intentionally trying to be the cool girl.

You just are being the cool girl. That's just your personality. I don't play it cool whatsoever. No. But as soon as everyone starts to like someone, you do drop your guard down a little bit and you do get excited. You start waiting for their message and then like, you know, that just naturally happens.

But again, I'm not thinking, oh, I need to wait 15 minutes to reply. I just reply. If I'm free, I will reply. He took 10, so I'm going to take 20. No. I hate that. I genuinely hate that.

Like, that's mind games. That's because you're a man child. For real. Okay, there's two more women stereotypes the next one is a game player so even though you hate to admit you play games if he takes oh if he takes four hours to text back you end up mirroring his behavior and then you reach a stalemate of both game playing and end up going around in circles rather than just saying how you feel and this is why i hate it because it is exactly that yeah you're playing a game next one

takes 20 next one takes 40 what is the point but who has time for that it's yeah that's the thing it messes so badly with your head and it's so time consuming because you're constantly having to just think about oh no it's just too long. But also, how long is this game going to go on for? Because if he takes a day, you're going to take two. Then what if he takes three, you're going to take six? Then what? You're going to start, like, how long do you let it go on for?

Well, I don't think people always genuinely, someone takes two, I take four, when it gets to that point. But they will just take such a long period to reply. So it looks like they're playing it cool and not that bothered but oh no i i if somebody thought oh she replied too quickly i that that to me doesn't bother me i'm like i think i replied too quickly i was on my phone i think when a woman has like a gameplay attitude that's when you end up getting more hurt because you're like attached to the situation rather than being the cool girl who doesn't really care so like you're like cosplaying the cool girl basically which is not good i think that is it i actually do think you end up getting yourself

more hurt because it's constantly on your mind all the time like you're thinking about all the time like you'll be waiting for his response and when you've got his response you're like amazing you don't even care what he said you're just thinking about how long you're going to take to reply it's just a very boring game that none of us want to be involved in um then the last one is the pick me girl so i pick me girl seeks male validation above all else to the detriment of other women they have no time or respect for other women and as the the name suggests, everything they do screams, pick me, choose me, love me to the men around them. I don't like pick me girls. No.

Do you know people like this? Yeah, I do know people like this. I definitely do. I do. And I think it's so obvious that they're doing it but then some men love it which is like i think that feeds into it more as to why they become the pick me girl because men feed into it so they're like this is gonna work it's because it's someone showing them so much attention i just don't understand why you throw another girl under the bus or i don't know personally i i just hate that i genuinely hate that putting other

girls down to make yourself look better to get a man no no no that's not how you want to get a man by putting somebody else down it's not it's not how you want exactly it's not how you want to get a man at all no not in the slightest i i don't like anything to do with that i absolutely hate absolutely hate so do i it's funny as well because i hear so many rumors about myself constantly every day but i've had this come up as a rumor before with me and another girl and i just thought honestly couldn't be any further from me if you tried because it's actually a load of shit and I hate girls that are like this you would never throw another girl under the bus ever ever ever I think it's different right if there's a bunch of single friends and you're all out and you're like oh I really hope we meet some guys tonight

I think that's different but I've definitely had the friends as well that genuinely all that they care about is just speaking to guys on a night out to the point where they don't even enjoy your entertainment because all they're there for is just to speak to guys and that I find so draining as well. It's like I get it but also you're here with your friends so maybe try and enjoy the time with your friends and actually me and you both have a friend that's very much like this okay for an example i was on my phone once this was a few years ago by the way and i was messaging this guy and this girl looks over my shoulder a friend oh what who's that and i was like oh this guy that i'm speaking to oh what's his instagram i want to follow him I've literally just said I'm speaking to him that's so weird

yeah that is the most bizarre thing like imagine if you were speaking to someone I said to you oh babe can I just get his Instagram I'm gonna follow him because I wanted to speak to him I can't imagine it because it happened to me well I know why i know but like and yeah she was a friend like it's just the it is the weirdest thing in the whole time so weird i was thinking i was thinking about the time we went on holiday with someone and a very picky situation happened oh yeah very pick me yeah that's what i was doing and it's always really weird because it turns out to be our friends like what the fuck saf and i were on holiday and there was a we were in a club and there was a guy that saf fancied um and he was gorgeous so we were like right that saf's guy if she's gonna get rid of anybody we'll like set her or whatever we'll see what we can do

so when all the girls are like oh my god we like you need to you need to go over to him blah blah I'm somebody who I I don't know what it is when I'm out clubbing I genuinely can't speak to guys like I actually can't do it it makes me feel so cringe and oh I just I just don't know like I don't think I've ever got with a guy in a club it's just not me I just just can't do it I just get I don't know it just cringes me out but I don't know if he was going to point this out but this guy kept looking at me and told me to come over but I said to the girls I can't I know Corinne I just I I don't know what it is I just can't seem to do it too much anxiety couldn't do it so

because he was telling me to come over and I thought I'm not going over myself I'm not going to do that anyways carry on with the story then I I think I ended up going over and speaking to somebody and we ended up going on the table to be fair I was a bit awkward like I wasn't making a move because that just isn't very much like me. I just, and to be honest, when I saw him, I didn't actually find him that attractive when I was actually close to him.

But, but you did, that was probably, from what you girls knew, I still do. Yeah, that was an inner thought. Like,

that wasn't an outer thought. Do you know what I mean? That you said out loud. So like, yeah, as far as we all knew, Saf still fancied this guy. And then literally,

I'd say, not even two minutes, not even two minutes not even two minutes she was all over him you've never known climbing him like a fucking tree in the car and we're not joking look honestly i didn't know where to put my eyes i did not know where to put my eyes. We were all just looking at each other like, is this actually happening or are we too drunk? Yeah. So bizarre. I think I would never forget that. I would never, ever, ever forget that.

And I still think to this day she thinks she's done no wrong. Oh, 1 million percent she thinks she's done no wrong. She did like, or maybe she, I was going to say maybe she doesn't, she ignored ignored it i don't know i or maybe she did no i think maybe she does ignore it maybe maybe she does it all the time i don't know but it was just so weird and very much a pick me situation because fully if that was me or you like the whole the every time we've been with her we've experienced something like that a hundred something like that always happens i don't know why always yeah that was crazy that actually it was really weird that none of us girls knew what to do with ourselves like i'm never looking around thinking surely not it takes

me a lot to be like speechless but i was like speechless like me did not know yeah did not know what to do so anyway we'll end it on that nice little story we do know a pick me girl yes Hey, you. Yeah, you. Scrolling TikTok and avoiding your chem homework? Chegg here. Hot take. You've seen enough Bama Rush, ASMR keyboard, and viral dance videos for one day. Let's lock in and start that assignment. If you need a little help, lean on Chegg's expert-supported learning tools. I say this with love. Put on some lo-fi beats and get going with our step-by-step study support. Your weekend will thank you. Small steps today means big wins tomorrow.

With Chegg. Subscribe today. You got this. After decades of shaky hands caused by debilitating tremors, Sunnybrook was the only hospital in Canada who could provide Andy with something special. Three neurosurgeons, two scientists, one movement disorders coordinator, 58 answered questions,

two focused ultrasound procedures, one specially developed helmet, thousands of high-intensity focused ultrasound waves, zero incisions. And that very same day, two steady hands. From innovation to action, Sunnybrook is special. Learn more action sunnybrook is special learn more at sunnybrook.ca special which one do you think you are then you think you're the cool girl i would say

i adapt more of the cool girl i'm not the pick me and I'm not a game player. But I also don't think I'm entirely fully cool girl. But I'd say I'm the most that one out of all of them. Yeah. Yeah, I would say so. You're definitely not a pick me girl. I'm definitely not a pick me and I'm definitely not a game player. Fuck that.

I probably used to be like years ago. You've got to go in that category. But I don't think that's a bad category to be in. I think that's a banging category for me and you to be in cool girl category yeah well that's a nice note to end the podcast on thank you all very much for listening be sure to check us out on socials and subscribe to the pod on spotify so you don't miss out on all of the goss and we will see you on thursday for another bonus episode bye everyone bye guys sex lies and dm slides is a spotify original podcast it was produced by spirit studios with olivia scott as the producer