Sex, Lies & DM Slides - 95. Can Men and Women EVER Really Just Be Friends?!

Episode Date: July 8, 2024

It's that age old debate made popular in the hit movie When Harry Met Sally. But why are we still questioning it to this day? Today, we discuss if men and women can ever really just be friends, or whether they will always end up being romantically involved. Plus, Ana shares her own experiences on this topic. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Visit connectsontario.ca. Let's go. hi guys and welcome back to another episode of sex lies and dm slides with me saffron barker and me anastasia kingsnorth so we are back for another week and back for another opportunity to deep dive into all things sex and relationships first of all how are you how's LA life you met king Rihanna again I did the fact honestly the way I gasped when I saw your story yeah and honestly only like a hand selected people were able to meet her as well so it's really cool um and when I went away with Fenty before I remember them telling me that like Rihanna had handpicked me and I was like no way still couldn't believe it even though they had

like told me yeah and and I met her and honestly she was just the nicest person she was so cute as well when I walked over she was going to everyone oh my god how beautiful is she how beautiful she and I was thinking Rihanna is telling me this are you are you actually joking oh my god is this actually happening um and then she also it was funny she said to me your parents must be so fucking cool because she doesn't actually have this accent she was like your parents must be must be so fucking cool because nobody has cool names in our generation like i want that name i was thinking rihanna's dishing me out the compliments i would take it oh my god um no yeah she's lovely she's such a nice person so yeah it's really nice to meet her and she's even more beautiful in real life i didn't even think

could be a thing she so she looked incredible the red oh my god i was obsessed with it she's just you look at her and you know she's a pop star you know she just looks like a pop star yeah she just has that look so um yeah she looks incredible she was so nice that was really cool i have been to so many events done so much the past week i feel like i'm never going to drink again I know babe but it's been great you've had a wild weekend and I love this for you I have I've met so many people I've had so much fun I feel like at some point the topic for today's um podcast I love so much that I feel as if I don't want to talk about my LA stories too long in this podcast but at some point I need to catch you up because the stories are so good and wild and crazy

and I can't I actually can't wait to fill you in I know um but how are you I'm good I got back from my book tour just finished my book tour so very tired I need to go to Bali tomorrow so I've literally spent the full day packing so I feel like it's literally just been like like non-stop every single day I haven't had like a day just to do nothing but I'm excited the tour was so fun like me and everybody was so nice the book has literally done insane I can say this on here now because by the time this pod comes out I'll be out but I got time as best-selling author so I'm officially a best-selling author congratulations I got number five I was literally I burst into tears when I got the message this

morning like someone from penguin messaged me like I just want to be the first one to share the news with you that you got it and I was like oh my god so that is just like that has made my entire year because that is exactly what I wanted um so yeah this week has just been a bit of whirlwind so now I'm like I'm gonna go celebrate in Bali go have some fun I've messaged an image in this morning when do you go away go tomorrow so I've oh wow yeah I was messaging an image so she's out there already so she was like right you need to bring this don't bring this bring this um yeah but honestly i just can't wait to go and party now i'm just like get me out there get me a tan like the next month of my life is just gonna be so fun fingers crossed oh my god you're gonna get so tan oh you really are gonna have the best time

so you're there for a month yeah with like just shy of a month it's like three and a half weeks i think so it's right okay and who are you there with um obviously well for the first 12 days it was obviously me Byron has Jed Imogen Molly and Zach Casey and Kate and then me Byron has booked on to stay for like another two weeks because if I'm going that far across the world I kind of want to make the most of it because it's gonna it's 18 hour flight um so has the same three days and then me and byron are staying for like another seven after that but yeah honestly i just can't wait i just think sun tan cocktails good food celebrations yes just living you're gonna have the best time ever oh babe i hope so so that's my little update it's been a wild week

but wow it has been a wild week I saw as well I was on TikTok I actually very rarely scroll on TikTok but I couldn't sleep last night so I was sat scrolling and I saw that somebody traveled 16 hours to go and see you on your book tour babe I thought wow that is dedication honest to god I because every person I met I was like oh like where do you live where have you come from and I was gobsmacked by like how far some people traveled like in my head I was just like oh yeah I'll just see people from the local area one girl told me a story she went to a Taylor Swift concert the night before she didn't want to miss my book tour so she slept in the airport and got the first flight back that

morning to make sure she got the train to come to the book tour all the way from Glasgow oh my god and I was just like the dedication that some people had I was like this is crazy I like I just hope you've had the best time and I hope you enjoy the book so I was just like what the hell like that is insane um so yeah thanks guys it was so lovely to meet you all oh I'm glad you've had the best time. Lots of people said they listened to the pod as well. Like the majority of people were like, love the pod. So shout out you guys. Thanks for listening. Let's go.

Hey you. Yeah, you. Scrolling TikTok and avoiding your chem homework. Chegg here. Hot take. You've seen enough Bama Rush, ASMR keyboard, and viral dance videos for one day. Let's lock in and start that assignment. If you need a little help, lean on Chegg's expert-supported learning tools. I say this with love. Put on some lo-fi beats and get going with our step-by-step study support. Your weekend will thank you. Small steps today means big wins tomorrow.

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And a whole lot of sunblock. Or even... Book last minute and go on a whim. Choose from over 130 airlines on last minute or peak season travel with no points hike. Switch to RBC Avion Visa and get up to 55,000 bonus Avion points. Limited time offer, conditions apply. Visit rbc.com slash Avion. this episode i'm actually very excited this episode i think it's quite fitting um for a lot of stuff that's going on on tiktok at the moment um and there is a debate which inspired this okay so today is the topic of the podcast I'm actually very excited about because I didn't know this was

going to be the topic of the podcast um and I have started reading this book called When Harry Met Sally but basically an old age debate which is known as the Harry and Sally debate has been rehashed on TikTok recently so we thought this would be a good topic to discuss in today's episode can men and women really ever just be friends now I don't scroll down tiktok so I didn't know that this was like a debate that's been like resurfaced so I genuinely could not believe this when I was reading this book and it just really made me have a complete different opinion on this I always thought i'm just gonna put it out here i always thought that men and women could be friends until i read this book and i'm not at the end of

what it's not a book it's a play because it then turns into a film but i'm not at the end of the play yet so i actually don't know the end of it oh i know what's gonna happen but um yeah i now actually believe that men and women can't be friends because of the guys. But it's funny how this has resurfaced. And yeah, I'm just, I'm kind of mind blown by it. I'm not going to lie. But anyways, we also put an Instagram poll up to see if our listeners think that men and women can really be friends. 78% of people said yes.

And 22% of people said no.'m quite surprised what do you think well first of all for some reason I thought you were going to say that the book said they can't be no they can be friends so I'm very intrigued as to why it said they can't be because for some reason I thought it's going to be the way around I am quite shocked by those answers because I feel like a lot of people think that they can't be so the fact that 78% of people have said yes I personally think is quite high I think they can be like I've got lots of guy friends and we're just well yeah just friends you say that but basically this book I have the book in front of me I can actually read it out because when i read it it made me laugh so much it's like a comedy right but it's so true and

it's based on a true story so it explains how the author was having this conversation with a guy and actually he was the director of the movie and he was saying how they can't be friends and that's how the whole movie came about basically right um anyways it goes on to say like no guy can be friends with a woman and not want to have sex with her and that's what it's about and she's like no way and he's like yes i'm telling you now if a guy is friends with you he will want to have sex with you then she continues to say but what if they're not attracted to you what if they don't even find you attractive he's like no they still want to have sex with you does it explain why though yeah it doesn't really explain why but he basically says no there was a reason for why he

he said he said they'd still want to have sex with you because i think it goes on to say that like guys don't need girls as friends okay like that was the whole preface like yeah of it okay so why would you be friends with a girl if that makes sense yeah okay yeah that makes sense you i think everyone everyone needs to i haven't actually even seen the movie because i wanted to play the play first so I'm reading the play but once I've got to the end I'm gonna watch the movie the movie is meant to be so good I think I need to watch this I think I need to watch this I know I hadn't even heard of the film so I definitely need to watch this like when I saw the play I was like oh my god I'm absolutely reading that wow okay well I really need to watch this film then because I'm very intrigued like

well yeah because for you it's hard because all your best friends are guys yeah yeah the majority of I don't have guy friends yeah the majority of my best friends are guys like so to me like yeah I guess that is shocking like I don't know i'm very intrigued i need to read watch that film now because especially by the point of them saying that like guys don't need girls as friends i think that's such an intriguing point because like obviously i can't ask questions it's a film but like why like i want to know why they say that do you know what I mean yeah I think it's I don't think the film is just all about this debate it's just something that gets brought up sorry spoiler it's very obvious very obvious from the beginning they're gonna end up together but okay he says no he says to her we can't just be friends that's how it like

starts right okay I've got you and that's how they have this conversation she's like why and then he goes on to explain but saying that your best friends are guys have you ever crossed paths with the friendship with your with your best friend yeah i mean have you yeah I mean I have obviously like so exactly and that's kind of the point yeah I'm like you have because I obviously Anna's written about it in her book yeah blown up by the way it's everywhere I'm seeing it I don't even I keep saying I don't scroll but I'm like and I saw this on TikTok and I saw this on TikTok um but the way I was but yeah gobsmacked when that made a tiktok like

because i didn't see it at first and then flossy sent me a message saying all i'm seeing is your sex life with byron on my for you page and i was like oh i was like that's weird because i haven't seen anything yet and as soon as i got that then i started to see it and i was like oh my god i think for me though like it was that's obviously not shocking news because like i already knew but obviously i guess to everyone else, obviously it was, but I didn't think that it would be in my head. I was just like,

oh yeah, whatever. But obviously, yeah, I have crossed that boundary with a guy friend from not just being friends to obviously sleeping with them. But then there is other friends that I've got that are guys that I would never cross that boundary.

And they would never. You would never, but would they they because this is the whole thing it's about guys like this whole debate is about guys but then also the friends that you're talking about though also aren't straight that is very true and that's so if you had guy friends that was straight your guy friends that you're talking about aren't straight so that would be why yeah the guy if they were straight or if they were bi then i'm sure they would want to the guy friends that i have that are straight well i actually lost my virginity to one of them so i guess it kind of like proves the point even more i guess but i've just never thought about it like that before like well you've got guy friends though like do you think like do you think the same

so it's funny because I have guy friends that haven't hit on me but oh I don't know how to word it but I've always thought like if this makes me sound like you know again this debate goes back to even if you're not even if they're not attracted to you but i always felt as if like i had tried so they'd be like go along with it okay yeah yeah i get you like if i tried to kiss my guy mates i want them to kiss me i just know they'd kiss me back yeah yeah so Yeah. So I, I actually strongly believe that, well, it's not that you can't be,

also the book goes on to say how, if you're both in a relationship, then you can be friends. Okay. So if you're friends with a guy that's in a relationship and you're obviously in a relationship, then of course you can be friends. Yeah. Because you love other people.

I like, you're not wanting to like, but then if you don't, so you're saying like, if you're single, then you can't can be friends. Yeah. Because you love other people. I like your normal into like, but then if you don't, so you're saying like, if you're single, then you can't just be friends. Yeah. But then it's hard,

isn't it? Because like I have, like I'm thinking of like two guy friends that I have that I absolutely love. Like I absolutely love. And I never want to cross that boundary with them because I genuinely love them so much. And I would hate the idea of not being friends with them. Also, imagine being in a relationship and you now have this opinion, but your boyfriend's now thinking you now can't be friends with this guy, even though nothing's going to happen because they are literally your friend.

Yeah. I don't know. I think like, I could see why a lot of people think you can't be friends more than can. Whereas I used to be the other way around. I, I think it's hard because

I wouldn't have a problem. But this is another question, right? Would you have a problem with your boyfriend having girlfriends um not if they've like been friends with them their entire life no this is what i was going to say i think the only time like it would actually bother me right in a relationship is if they started becoming friends with a girl after i was with them because then i'd be like oh why do you suddenly like her so much where does she suddenly come from that's the only time it would bother me like i also agree if

they but then i don't know also how i'd react or how i'd be if i then was seeing my boyfriend they were like oh yeah so i have slept with this friend i have slept with this friend i have done this with that friend oh yeah but that's different though. You're just saying if they were friends. Yeah, but then it's like, then there's a whole other layer of complications because I have had to tell people before in the past, oh, you know, I have slept with Byron. Oh, like, oh no.

And no one's ever, like no one's ever thought anything of it. I got quite lucky in that sense. But I feel like some people could get quite funny about it. Yeah. Like I don't want to. No, straight up. If my boyfriend had slept with his best friend.

No. Well, that's what I mean. Like. I mean, I couldn't break up their friendship. I just, I couldn't break up their friendship I just I couldn't be with them I know I couldn't yeah that's why it would drive me nuts yeah that's what I mean like I think it would be different if it was like 10 years ago or something maybe yeah I mean like still you're gonna know that they have they're attracted to each other and if it's like one of their really good mates they obviously spend loads of time together I don't know for me for nah actually I don't even know why I'm like no I couldn't actually do it that's the simple answer is I just couldn't see for me I don't think I wouldn't have a leg to

stand on I couldn't say anything because I spend half my life with Byron so then if I when I suddenly have a boyfriend in the mix as well and I'm like obviously gonna find out about what happened like I'm not I would never change my friendship with Byron they're definitely gonna find out yeah they're definitely but they're definitely gonna find out what happened but like we were comfortable with like sharing that because that's another thing actually I was checking like people were like yeah this is what I was gonna say I know the answer but did Byron know that you was gonna write this in your book yeah because I feel like that's a whole big debate he was fully aware like of course I would never write anything

like that without his permission and he was fully aware that I was sharing the story he knew I was sharing the story I wrote it last year and he was very aware and obviously maybe yeah he I mean I guess we didn't really know the reaction of what people were gonna say like we were just yeah I kind of put it out there and just kind of forgot that story was in it but obviously that was the first story that kind of came out um but yeah no he was completely fine completely consensual about it you might have seen his video online kind of explaining his side of it and he should never have had to upload that video like I'm I don't think anybody should have to explain their sexuality if they don't want to. I think that's completely personal. No matter if he's been open about it online before,

it's not for anybody else to debate. That's his choice and his choice only. So he shouldn't have had to make that video. But the thing is, that's social media. Everyone thinks they have the right to debate everything about everyone. Yeah, everyone thinks. And it's so funny how, oh God, here I am, so just going off on a topic.

But it's just so funny how everyone preaches i am so just going off on a topic but it's just so funny how everyone preaches be kind and isn't is the guy i can i will never understand it like something bad happens to someone everyone preaches be kind but until then everyone's happy to like make these montages post these videos just not realizing the effect that it actually brings someone is just baffling people do it for a few likes and a few comments and i think you're doing that at the sake of what like actually somebody else's life because you don't know how they're feeling or like how bad it could get for them so like yeah but the thing like we could say it to a blue in the face no one's going to stop doing it that sadly just is the world we live in now and i don't think it's gonna get any better

but um yeah it made me sad that brian had to make that video and I don't think it's gonna get any better but um yeah it made me sad that Brian had to make that video and I watched it before it went up but I was like you know what I was like I think it's such a lovely video because I feel like it will people who feel like they don't want to be put in a box I think people will really appreciate that video from him um yeah I just I don't know yeah but of course he was like completely consensual about me putting the story out imagine I'd done that and it was like, surprise. He literally read one of the messages in the audio book. Um,

like at the time. Um, but had he, had he read the entire chapter before? Cause obviously he knew that he was doing it, but had he read it or not? He, he knew what I'd wrote, but he hadn't read it like word for word,

but he knew what was being like spoken about and stuff. Yeah. Of course. Of course. But, um, yeah. read it like word for word but obviously he knew what was being like spoken about and stuff yeah of course yeah but um yeah so a very weird topic to be talking about the podcast this week very fitting because obviously it's all come out honestly before i wrote that story in the book i probably never would have admitted it just because like did your mum know yeah my mum knew because obviously i knew but like how many people around you knew before it came out? Oh, only us lot. My mum knew, but like only really like the group. Do you know what I mean?

Like it was never like. Yeah, because I was going to say, have a lot of your friends and stuff messaged you as well, saying like, what the hell? Not one person actually. No, because like the people that would message me were the people who already knew. Do you know what I mean?

Right, okay. So no one really found it like that i mean we were just giggling at some of the tiktoks because someone found this god awful video of me i have not got a fucking clue where they got it from and they captioned it something like oh anna's face when byron's diving into her or something like that and i thought what like it's the worst tiktok i've ever seen of me in my life and i just thought i actually don't know where people find these things from and why they'd even need that tiktok like what but neither but i found it funny and viran also finds it funny because we were like if people

are talking about you they must care enough i was like we've bothered their day enough to be talking about me so carry on this is what i always think at least you're relevant enough that people want to talk about you so babe that's what i thought let them talk i'm like please any press is good press so carry on talking guys carry on making those tiktoks but yeah i think it's hard though because like coming out of that now obviously this happened years ago and nothing ever changed in minor byron's friendship after that happened we we literally carried on exactly how we were it was once no it's never awkward never like nothing changed so it is just it is i think we should start a campaign though to get you and byron together oh babe don't worry that's half

my dms literally half is it really yeah it's half my dms guys i've wanted them because obviously i've known this the whole time and they have the best friendship it's's half idea guys i've wanted them because obviously i've known this the whole time and they have the best friendship it's never gonna happen but i've just always wanted them to be together yes they just have the most amazing friendship that also yeah it's probably not worth nearly ruining it but you would be amazing together yeah i yeah and the thing is that we've obviously we had the conversation years ago and it has we had to have the conversation about it but the thing is like it is just it's not worth ruining the friendship for like as much as we have done that in the past it's like now I think we've learned it's like right we are just the best of friends

and that's fine and it's gonna be left at that but I love him with all my heart he is actually one of the best people I've ever met in my life and like I'm actually I'm really glad it happened because like we've known each other for like eight years we preempted it to happen for a couple of years it was gonna happen sometimes with some people you just know it's you've just got to do that um yeah but yeah no Saf has always is always equally rooted for us. So appreciate the love, Abigail. Let's go. As the world's population grows, so does the need for resources like Potash to support sustainable food production. This is why BHP is building one of the world's most sustainable

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that i've slept with but i also don't really have many male friends yeah like i really don't have many male friends and my male friends are in relationships with girls I know which is probably why they're my friend yeah I reckon I honestly have about maybe three guy friends and a lot of them I don't see unless I'm like traveling I'm away um so yeah I haven't slept with any of my friends so I would find it frustrating I wouldn't find it a red flag because i i just think it's someone's insecurities i yeah i don't think i'd find it a red flag i don't know would you um i don't think i'd find it necessarily a red flag

surface level but like i'd have to be somewhat understanding to the fact that you know I obviously have like slept with one of my friends before so I have to understand that it's not the easiest situations the only time I would find it to be a red flag is if they asked me to stop spending time with that person person or if they asked me to like break off the friendship with somebody because they were insecure about it I'd say absolutely not like you've come into my life my friendships are not changing with anybody to suit you but that should like like five well five years ago it's a bit long but like two three years ago I never would have had that mindset like I would have been so like yeah yeah whatever now I'm like no that is that would absolutely never happen so I think I wouldn't see it as a red flag if they're a little bit jealous I'd just be like okay you're

a little bit like I kind of like a little bit healthy jealousy like I think that's like I don't know I find it quite attractive in a relationship but yeah if he got to the point where they were like no you can't see that person you can't do this major red flag like major major red flag I do think it's it is gonna be probably harder for you when you're in a relationship because yeah people are more likely gonna feel that way but um you know what though yeah you can't tell like for you you're you're with sorry to keep using Byron as an example but with Byron you're never gonna break off that friendship he's your best friend yeah so like you're somebody's just going to have to accept that.

Like, from my point of view, because I haven't slept with any guy friends, I guess it would be, like, if somebody told me to break off the friendship, I'd see that as a red flag. But if they expressed to me that they feel jealous because of X, Y, and Z, like, I wouldn't think red flag because I would get it. But if they wasn't asking me to

not be friends with them I wouldn't if they was asking me to not be friends with them then that would be more closer to a red flag you know well it would be a red flag a hundred percent and I mean you know what like I've got to say my ex-boyfriend he obviously knew that I was hurt with Byron and he had no problem with it at all he never brought it up I told him he asked a couple of questions and that was it never got brought up again never asked questions and obviously he knew that i spent half my life with byron and like i said had no problem with it so i feel like there is guys out there who would have no problem with it but i think they have to be so secure in themselves to know that like well it's not going to happen again so it doesn't matter and i love that attitude because like he wasn't an insecure man in the sense of

like he was stressing all the time that like oh my god why is she doing with him why is she doing this with him blah blah like to me that's unattractive like I found that attractive quality because I was like yeah he's securing himself to know that it's not going to happen and he's securing in himself enough and in our relationships no I would never do that so I don't know I think yeah it's hard I get like the situation would be a little bit different for me because obviously I have so I have to be somewhat understanding but yeah the only time I would find it a red flag is if they were like break off the friendship because that to me that's like a controlling thing which I don't like at all okay so would you find it weird if you saw a boyfriend of one of your friends hanging out

with a girl so like you saw them out for dinner or you saw them out for drinks like would you find that way would you say something to your friend uh yes yeah i would in a heartbeat i find it really weird if i if i went out and i saw just for example has his boyfriend with a different girl just the girl i would be a bit like hmm who would just be like hmm i'd go over i don't know i couldn't just be like hmm i'd be over there saying who's this see i think i've never heard of you in my life i see i think i would ring first i think i'd go outside and ring my friend no i actually would too because it could be that he's having a meeting or like yeah like so imagine if you bar joe if you're

like who is she and she's like she's like i'm his manager from work and you're like oh shit i'm so sorry joe no but what i mean is i would if i knew that there was something weird going on i would be over there oh if i if a hundred if i was on the phone to my friend they said he's lied about where he is or blah blah i don't know who that girl is i'd be like okay then i'd go and be like who's that oh no i've never met you before like i'd go do you know what i mean i'd like do that to make sure they know they've been caught out yeah because then he would be shut up he'd be like oh my god what if it was like a group of okay that he had like one boy mate but then there was like a group of, okay, that he had like one boy mate, but then there was like a group of like five girls? Again, still weird.

Yeah, still really weird. I think I'd still just take the same approach, ring my friend first and say, do you know who these girls are? I think it'd be different as well if the friend was single friend was single though because you can't help it if that like i know i've been somewhere and i've been in a relationship my friend hasn't and vice versa but let's say i'm in the relationship and my friend's single and we're sat speaking to guys there's no harm in me speaking to them like i'm speaking to them because my friend's single and obviously fancy is one of them and you've also probably told them about your boyfriend and i would have told them all that i have a boyfriend yeah completely so i don't know like that sort of thing i think there's always context like another one of my

friends i've so my best friend libby she was in a relationship for seven years and then she wasn't for a little bit now she's in another relationship so she's been in a relationship a lot longer than i have like i was single for two years in while she was in this relationship and we would go places and we'd speak to guys and libby would always say i have a boyfriend but libby's then just sat speaking to a group of guys because i'm sat speaking to someone that i fancy yeah so the ratio wouldn't necessarily always be you know yeah the ratio the ratio wouldn't add up that's what i mean so i feel like as a whole you can you could look at the situation and walk and be like

oh no why is he over there with a group of girls but you actually don't know the situation so it could be that it could be a lot of different things or it could just be like a mixed male and female friendship group which like my home group is that it's two girls and three guys and they're all straight but they all have girlfriends so like joy it's a weird like if people saw us out people probably think like oh they're on a double date there's been like us two girls and it's funny because my head goes to so what do those guys think of you after i've read this book but they're in relationships so it it's different. Yeah, they're all in relationships. That's what my head now goes to,

because I'm like. Yeah, they're all in relationships, and I know they'd still, they'd probably be the best wingmen, to be honest. Like, they really,

really would be, but like, if I was out with Tanisha, and just with like, Devon Dore, for example, people would probably be like, oh,

it looks like they're on a double date, but we're not, we're genuinely all just friends, and wouldn't go near each other. So, I think it's so different. Like I'm really intrigued to watch this film or like read the play because to say they can't be friends,

I find shocking because I have straight friends that I would not go near. And honestly, I don't know if they'd go near me. I really don't. Maybe they would, but maybe I'm just completely naive. I think they would. I think they would. i don't know it's not even like this book goes on and on about it by the way but i just i think it's just very much because it's a play it's not a story it's written like how a guy would speak and okay to me

i can just imagine a male friendship group having conversations about their girlfriend, like literally girlfriends. Yeah. I don't know. I can understand it. I can see it. Yeah. And it's funny how when you become friends with somebody, because personality plays such a big part, obviously sexual chemistry makes such a big part and you have to be attracted to someone too but because personality is such a big part obviously as we all know when somebody has a

great personality you find them more attractive so even if you don't find somebody attractive if they're a really good friend of yours i can just very easily see how it's a thing but apparently is way more of a thing for guys which i can also see i can yeah i can definitely see it more from a guy point of view have you seen that tiktok trend of where girls try and kiss their guy mates or their guy best friend they just put the camera down and they'll just like do it just grab and kiss them and all the comments i haven't seen the comments are funny because there was one and the girl went to like they were just sat in a bar and she went to grab his face and he pulled away like what are you doing but there's others where they'll just get with them i don't know what to search to show you the trend but it might come up on a few pages now we've

spoken about it but like it was a massive trend on tiktok at one point to go and kiss your guy friends and see what their reaction was and it was really yeah it was very much reactions see even the guys that pulled away like it's probably from shock i'm also by the way yeah maybe everyone in this category but this kind of vouches for the fact that men and women can't be friends but they always say that really good relationships are built from friendships and from being best friends like when you'd see people who have been together for years we're always like yeah he's my best friend he was my best friend are built from friendships and from being best friends like when you'd see people who've been together for years we're always like yeah he's my best friend he was my best friend for years and then we got together or like oh yeah we were friends first because i think that is so important

in the relationship to have that friendship first so i don't know no it's very very true i don't know it's hard because i everything i said everything I've said throughout this podcast as a whole I don't think they could be friends but then at the same time

I do have guy friends that I just want to be friends with yeah me too but I don't know if they feel the same way I think my thing is

I feel like somebody always wants to sleep somebody it's like although I know I don't they might do or vice versa let's go let's go

I need to I want to know a guy's opinion on this I need to ask a guy I obviously can't ask my friend they're all in relationships that's not a question i'm asking until they're single but yeah i have one friend that i could possibly ask who who's single and i but i don't know how do you even ask that like how without making it look as though i'm trying to put a move on you because i'm not i'm just curious well literally just ask can guys and girls be friends should i ask him i think he replied to me straight away this is a guy i met in australia by the way and we're still friends two years later i love him like he's and but i think he'll say yes but i think if you explained should i ask or does the guy always want to shag a girl yeah i think that's what you need i've just put question

can girls and guys be friends or does the guy always want to sleep with girl yeah i think that's all you need to ask. I've just put question can girls and guys be friends or does the guy always want to sleep with the girl? Yeah I think that's like the question to ask He's typing. Because if I go to the hall everyone would say like yeah but he's typing. He just put why but I just need to know ASAP Just say you're not going to

say who it is but I'm just we're debating it on a podcast. Yeah I just used to know ASAP for the pod. He's typing he put course they can be wow okay but i thought i knew he'd have that response because i know he has a lot of female friends but then maybe if i went yeah i don't know i don't know do it is i don't think they cannot be friends i just think someone's probably always attracted to someone he's typing i think that's what it is he's typing again so oh he put you've come to me of all people for this question yes well anyways after us debating this topic would love to know all of your opinions i feel like i very strongly put my opinion out there there's only change from reading this play weirdly um oh no but saying that like i have

guy friends that i just love that i'd never go there oh yeah i don't know i've got mixed opinions because i think like i have kind of proven that girls and guys can just be friends but then also i understand no you haven't well no but like you've done the opposite yeah what now yeah but i think i think the point is like not not being friends but like without one being attracted to another or like having or basically sleeping together so that's what this like thing is about it's not that you can't be friends but it's that you'll end up sleeping together or somebody will be attracted to another person. Like that's,

that's what it is. I guess you're still friends. I need to just, but you've crossed the friendship. Yeah. I guess I just need to ask guys this question. It's never really a question that I've thought about purely because I have so many guy friends,

but now I'm just intrigued as to what on earth they would say or do if I went to kiss them. Like, would they be like, oh, get off? Oh, he just put, he said, I've got girls who I'm friends with

who are obviously attractive, but I would never try and sleep with them. Wow, okay. So maybe, because he doesn't want to ruin the friendship. Yeah. So like, maybe he obviously has thought about it but he would never do it so maybe yeah maybe all guys do think about it then see that's that's what it is okay so sorry it's taken me this long

to get out for i think from reading this book that i've got on about non-stop it's made me think that every guy who has a girl friendship has thought about it. That's what it is. I'm always saying you can't be friends because you absolutely can and nothing happened. Personally, I think. I know a lot of people that have guy friends and nothing's happened between them. Nothing's happened between me and my guy friends. But basically what it says is that every guy will think it.

At some point they will think it in their friendship. maybe that is true then maybe every guy has thought about it because he's kind of just admitted that himself as well that he's thought they're attractive which maybe would yeah lead to other thoughts but you just never would wow i'm very i need to really sit and think about this topic and now think about all my straight guy friends I'm really really curious and also watch this film because I've never heard of this film so I need to watch it yeah need to watch it we should watch it together oh like yeah when you're back and when I'm back we can watch it um well that is all for today guys thank you so much for listening um be sure to check us out on socials

and subscribe to the pod on Spotify so you don't miss out on all of the gossip. And we shall see you on Thursday for another bonus episode. Bye, everyone. Sex Size and DM Size is a Spotify original podcast. It was produced by Spirit Studios.