Sex, Love, and What Else Matters - 30 Dates in 3 Days with Gabi Conti

Episode Date: August 30, 2023

Episode 56. This week, Kristen and Luke are joined by Gabi Conti, author, host, and writer. Gabi talks about what it was like going on 30 Dates in 3 Days and offers advice that ACTUALLY helps in dating. Gabi is the author of “Twenty Guys You Date in Your Twenties” and host, co-executive producer, and co-creator of the true crime and true dating podcast “Am I Dating a Serial Killer?”.  They also discuss an upcoming project called “Bad Influencer” which is a scripted fiction podcast in which Kristen makes a cameo! Tune in to hear tips on setting up your dating profile, how to be safe on dates, and the story of how Gabi met her husband through a dating app! Follow us: @kristendoute @luke__broderick Email us: [e-mail] Sponsors: LMNT is offering a free sample pack with any purchase, That’s 8 single serving packets FREE with any LMNT order. Get yours at DrinkLMNT.com/DOUTE. Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/kristen Dipsea is offering an extended 30 day free trial when you go to DipseaStories.com/KRISTEN Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hi you guys, I'm Kat and I hope you come hang out with me on KatSatlerNow. On my weekly podcast I continue to ask the questions. I've been interviewing people for more than 25 years now, but that doesn't mean I found all the answers. Make sure to listen to KatSatlerNow, wherever you get your podcasts. Okay guys, welcome back to another episode of Sex Love and What All Smathers. Luke and I are here with a very old, not old in age. It's like a very long term friend of mine. I want to introduce you guys,

comedian, writer, host, author, entertainer, extraordinaire. I don't even know what I'll say about you, Gabby, but this is Gabby Conti, everybody. Aw, thank you, guys. And hi, Luke, nice to meet you. Yeah, nice to meet you, personally. Meet your person. I love that. I met this amazing, lovely new studio.

So gorgeous. This is the first time in here. So we now have a studio. We are no longer podcasting from our dining room table. And Gabby's our first guest in the studio, and I'm just fucking stoked. What an honor. Oh my gosh.

So Gabby, I'm trying to think how long I've known you. It's been, God, I don't know, eight years. I think it was 15, 2016, where we did pretty inappropriate our female sketch group. We started as carb-free comedy, which was hilarious. That was so funny. And so basically it was Gabby and our friends Jacqueline Marfurgey and Rachel Brian, three stand-up comedian females who I consider myself, I actually said this on last week's episode with Jared Freed, but I consider myself a female comedy groupie, where I was just like,

all of my girlfriend's in our comedians, I just wanna follow you, everybody. But you're so funny. You are so funny. And to have that skill to be able, like Kristen ended up doing like an SNL style mom log at the beginning of our show, and I knew you're so nervous,

but you crushed it, and that is not were so nervous, but you crushed it. And that is not easy to do. That really is it. Is this recorded in some film? Can I see it? No, here's the worst part about just that moment is that on Vanderpump Rules, they had us redo it and they filmed it and aired it at the improv.

So when we first did it, it was Hotel Cafe, then we sold out the improv and all the girls did, stand up, we had a couple guys, all of the girls did, stand up. We had a couple guys, amazing comedians do stand up as well, but they had me do my monologue. However, my original monologue was making fun of myself for being on reality television. That was the whole point. And on Vanderpump rules, they're like, you got to change that. We can't use that stuff.

So it was really shitty. So people that watched that episode were probably like bitches isn't funny at all. That's what she wrote. It's like that the start of censoring comedy. Maybe. That was the whole thing with the dick pic, which I didn't know that that was Jackson.

And I went to go get that printed by my printer. And I was like, yeah, it's a joke. We're like, we wanna see the junk in the like, I think it was Starry Night. And I had no idea where that photo came from. Oh my printer. And I was like, yeah, it's a joke. We want to see the junk in the, like, I think it was Stari Knight. And I had no idea where that photo came from. Oh my God. So all of our Vanderpump rules fans, Luke has no idea what we're talking about.

Oh, these two guys are so cool. So essentially, yeah, like what Gabby's saying, we had a sketch, a little troop that the girls involved me. And I became such a better writer for it. And like, I learned so much. But one of our sketches was like about a dick pick. And how of our sketches was about a dick pick and how no one wants to get a dick pick.

And Gabby wrote it and it was about how you can hide a dick pick in a birthday card or a painting or something of that nature. And the app does it, but it doesn't do a good job at it. So you can still clearly see it in all the pictures. So when we were looking for a dick pick to add in a picture of a penis, of course we Googled,

oh my god, Gabby, you're killing me right now. We Googled dick pick and everything that showed up was like, it was all these politicians. Remember, it was like Richard and like dick. Or like what's wrong with my penis? Yeah, so it's like weird thing. And so at that time, at that time, Jackson, Brittany, they kind of just started dating.

And I had gotten a dick pic from a random Twitter account with like, you know, user 735-877, little blah blah blah, asterisk, whatever. But it was like supposedly a picture of Jack's taking like a selfie dick pic that he sent to someone. So I, all of a sudden went, oh my God, I know where to find a dick pic. If I go back to these tweets, like in my inbox,

we're gonna have, I don't know if it's really Jack's or not, like so I'm told it is, but fuck it, let's use it. It's like, there's a giant dick pic, right? So it created a lot of controversy. My friends weren't very happy with it. I was completely unaware of all of this. I just said, I was like, dude, I just said, guys, I have a dick pic and I sent it to Gabby

and the girls and she was like, great. Great, I'll bring it to my printer who also prints my head shots. So, I'm like, oh my God. Oh my God, Gabby, how you've grown since shots. So, I'm like, oh, God. Oh, my God. Gabby, how you've grown since then. Oh, yeah. Your book is brilliant.

Oh, thank you. So is yours. 20, thank you. But 20 guys, you're dating your 20s. And now it has been adapted. Yes, it's now in French. I don't speak any French, but if you do speak French, and you go to a French book store,

you can get it in French. And then it's available wherever you buy books in English, and there's also an audiobook of it as well. But I think you need the hard copy because there's like charts and quizzes, and it's colorful and fun, like flipping pages of like a magazine, so I would recommend getting a hard copy. So I have to ask you about your audiobook. So you read it for the audiobook?

I read it because it's also 20 stories about all the different relationships I was in, which some relationships lasted a day or two. Others were more long-term than that. And so it's about the different types of relationships. And so I read all the stories, and then I read all the advice because also at the end of each chapter, the guy I wrote the story about,

I sent him the story and he got to give his perspective on it. So I read that, I had an expert way in, I had a couple because the types are more like relationship types, like long distance, the guy you always go back to, the guy who's hotter than you, cooler than you, younger than you, older than you. And I always joke that like my husband is like several of those types of relationships.

He's cooler than me, he's younger than me. And we were like an instant relationship. It was like very like quick, but I was like, we have to look back at the book and see what the advice was. I think this quiz. And make sure that we're doing everything right. So, my God, Luke and I need to do that.

Yes, you have to. It's fun to do the quiz when you are like, you can use it at any stage of your relationship when you're first starting to date someone or when you're in the relationship to kind of go back and play the games. Yeah, because when your book came out, I was single. Yes.

And I just bought my house when I got your first copy of my book. So I was like, I mean, of course I write a book. But I was like, I don't really need to go in and thinking about it, but now that I have a boyfriend who's from Indiana, like your husband is, like it's what a weird coincidence. So funny, yes. But I would love, Luke and I, you really need to, yeah.

Maybe we do a totally sidebar podcast about just going through Gabby's book and like realizing like which places you fit it and because you are younger, cooler, right? It's fun. And that's the whole point that like you can date like people like, oh man, it's like a man-bashing book. It's like all about how horrible men are.

I'm like, no, actually like I'm an optimist and I think like you can definitely date. Like it's dating is fun and it can be fun. Like the only thing is like how to recognize a toxic relationship, which is really important for me to add because I think, it's, dating is fun and it can be fun. Like, the only thing is like how to recognize a toxic relationship, which is really important for me to add because I think unfortunately, it's the reality of dating and like, you could be in a mentally abusive relationship

and have no idea. And so I wanted to make sure like, this is the only relationship you should not make work. Here's how to get out of it. But all the others are like obstacles that you can overcome. Well, that's great. I love that.

My question about the audiobook side, that's the best. Oh, yeah, sorry. I'm a big audiobook person. Yeah, Lucas. I have a massive audiobook library. And I can't stand them when they're red monotone. And Kristen said when she did her adaptation,

she was told she had to read monotone. Oh, really? It was during COVID. I was like, no knocking my peeps out there. But yeah, it was during COVID. And they had me do my audiobook and I wasn't allowed to like, be even, be in contact or like, be near like the one producer we had to wear masks.

Yeah, same room we were doing. We were doing my own thing. But they told me, literally, to read it, like monotone and it felt so physically uncomfortable and I've only listened to about like five seconds of it because I'm like, that doesn't even sound like me. I'm too animated But is that how most audiobooks are since no I like I was just Performances so maybe it was like just that one director was like this is how we do it on my audiobook

You guys I'm gonna do damn Instagram live I'll just do it the way you should redo it Yeah, because I know with yours like you would tell the story I told the story because a lot of these stories I've told on stage too and when I was writing the book I would go to open mics I would go to do shows and I would tell the stories that way and kind of workshop them So that was kind of well I wrote the book when I was going through a breakup with all other Turns out the guy who I thought was my person was not my person and it was just awful, but I'm happy It's over. I just remember you even having a boyfriend.

You met him. Who? We don't have to say who he is. But you met him. You had a boyfriend. I love to think about it. Yeah, so I got a boyfriend. You got one.

I got one off the street. I got one off the street. Yeah, so the last guy I dated in my 20s, so we were together when I turned 30. I met him in LA through like neutral friends and he got a job in New York and he asked me if I wanted to move to New York. Do you remember this? I remember this. He asked me if I wanted to move to New York with him to like start our life and I was like, oh, how romantic. I like felt like I was like, carry like moving

to Paris, but like we know how that worked out. Yeah, exactly. And so I like uproot my life in Los Angeles, like not realizing like I was saying goodbye to so much. I was living with Jacqueline at the time. I completely got rid of everything, got rid of my car, everything moved across the country. That was April 2018. By November 2018, we were broken up and I was living with my parents

when their house actually went into foreclosure. So they were getting rid of everything in the house and I was dealing with writing the first manuscript. So it was just like a, and then I came back to LA by Valentine's Day 2019. I wish it, that's an eye opener. I'm never doing that again. Yeah, never doing that again.

Like what a, yeah, it was nuts, absolutely nuts. That's, oh God, your life is just so fascinating. And you story tell it so well, that's the thing. Like you'd be such a great songwriter too. Oh, thank you. Like a country songwriter. I feel like. Collaborate with Taylor Swift, maybe.

I had a band once. We won? What? Well, it's like band is really a, so it was my roommate at the time. And him and I, we started in duo. We called ourselves the Nestles or the Nestles. It was up to our fans to decide.

It was like a joke. It was like a joke. It was like a joke fan, but we wrote all these songs. And we performed them at comedy shows for a while. And then we always joke, we're like, oh, reunion, 20, 29, the fans want it. Like, I think the fans want it. I want it. It's just, it's too funny.

We'd decovers in some original songs, but they were all out of it. I don't know this. I feel like such a bad friend. No, because I didn't really promote it that much. And when we were doing those shows was before I met you. And then I hadn't done shows since then.

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have seen this, this something Gabby did with Super viral. So you write for, obviously, you're an amazing writer and you were writing for Cosmo. No big deal. No big deal. And BD, just writing for Cosmo magazine. No fucking big deal, right? When she told me this, I was like, I'm crying, dying, sweating.

How did you decide to do 30 dates and three days? So that's what you did. Yeah, that's what you wrote about. In real life, you've already had a lot of time. So I was writing for the magazine at the time. I was working with an editor. We were trying to think of what was gonna be like my first digital piece that I was writing. And I was, and so much of my-

You're so Andy from like, How to Lose a Guy in 10 days? Yeah, but like How to Lose a Guy in 10 seconds. Yeah. I'm 29 more dates after this. But so we were working together. We're trying to, I was pitching her all the time of like different ideas, different ideas,

and that's a lot of what like magazine, and also like writing for websites is, as you pitch all the time, sometimes you get like a feedback of like, yes, let's do this one, whatever. So I was pitching back and forth, and meanwhile, I was posting on my Instagram, I had just gotten out of that relationship from New York,

so I was like single for the first time in a while, and I like could not get myself to date. I knew I had to go on dates, knew that was part of the healing process, and I really wanted to go on dates, but I was like having a hard time like holding myself accountable. So I started doing this thing on my Instagram

called Daily Date, where I would film myself before and after dates. I would never really like tell anything about the guy, or even if I like had a bad experience on a dating app, I would post about it, and it was kind of a way to start a conversation about dating and like getting advice from other people who were out there on what to do.

It was a great sounding board and it ended up giving me confidence to do it. So my editor saw it and she's like, this is great, can we turn this into an article? And I'm like, sure, 30 dates and 30 days. And she's like, no, how about 30 dates and three days? Because that has been done before, 30 dates and 30 days. There's a book and everything.

So yeah, I just was like, okay, is that physically possible? And I did the math and I'm like, well, if I start on a Friday, I have to do 10 dates a day. So Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and I got the pitch greenlit on a Friday. So I had a week to set up all these dates starting on the following Friday. So you only had a week. I didn't know that. That's a lot of swiping.

A lot of swiping. Luckily, I was already on all the dating apps at the time. So I was like, it was pretty much a full-time job. Like organizing all these dates. I had a spreadsheet. I shared my local. Oh, your calendar. calendar.

It was hilarious. Yeah. And I showed it to like friends too. And one of my friends said to me, she's like, well, if you go missing, we'll have 30 suspects. And so I started freaking out. So I shared my location with my neighbor, who's also a good friend of mine.

And I- Ladies, smartest thing ever, every time one of my girlfriends goes out on a date, I force them to share their location, even if it's just until the end of the night. Right, yes. So we shared the location. And I had a spreadsheet with all of their pictures for her to see and their profile and all the information

I had on them too. So if I, like, she could find out where I was, God forbid anything happened. But as I was setting up the dates, and when I hit Wednesday, I only had 15 dates booked from dating apps, and I told my editor, and I was like, can I crowdsource these dates?

And she goes, okay, yeah, you can do it. So I posted on my Instagram store. So like half of the dates were set up, and then half of the dates were dating apps. And I wanted to tell everyone about it But she said no don't do it because you're not gonna get like an authentic read like the person might be on your best Behave their best behavior right if you are really looking for love You want to see like if it's genuine and then you know if they like you enough?

No, probably stick with it right so that was how so half of them knew half of them didn't know and that's how that all started Yeah, and you got one one one of your dates you got on camera, which was a really fun part of the video, the 10 minute video that Cosmo has. Have you ever been on a date on camera, and the waiter pokes his head in, do you want another peron? He, I love that part. He was so sweet. Yeah, that's sad. He was so nice, and I was really grateful that he did that. And I had another, actually I had another date that I filmed at the farmer's market, but there was something wrong with like the sound on it, but yeah.

So just really quickly, but like how was that experience? Because we get to see the video. So I encourage all of you to like go to YouTube, you can go if you just type in 30 dates and three days, Gabby Conti, you're gonna see this like 10, little bit over 10 minute video that Cosmo posted. And it's like a montage of Gabby like showing you like, okay, day one, date one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

I'm exhausted, I'm wearing this outfit now. Like there's just so many in the middle. It's brilliant. Thank you. But like how did it feel? Exhausting. Like so draining. Like did you care by day two or three?

By I did because I was, I'm a hopeless romantic. So I was determined to find someone that I had a good connection with. I really was looking for that. I think the thing I missed most about my ex was having someone that you're with, but also was like your best friend. And I think I realized throughout the process

that that's what I was looking for. I was looking for a best friend. I was looking for a companion. I really wanted that in my life. Yeah. So by day two, I was, it was just tiring, because I was getting up so early to go on these coffee dates, hikes, whatever.

And then I was staying up so late, and I also had to be careful about how much I was drinking, because I didn't want to black out. And also how much coffee I was having, because I didn't want to have a heart attack. So I was like a lot of just balancing all of that. And then I think what happened is the very last guy I had a date with, we ended up being like, oh, it counts as like five dates because we ended up, it ended up lasting

so long. I don't necessarily think we were like the best connection. He was so, so sweet, but I think it was more like I was just so relieved to be on a date with someone who just made it feel like easy and comfortable and it was just so refreshing. You're like, I'd rather have to have that. I've got more dates with you. Yeah. I can't do another person. Yeah, and so they let so refreshing. You're like, I just got on more dates with you. Yeah. I can't do another person.

Yeah, and so they let us count that as like, but to you end a date 30, this guy you went on like four or five dates with, you admit, like, you know what, he was super great, so hot, but just not my person. Wasn't, yeah, it ended up not working out. Also because he like lived kind of far away. But that was like, do you live in Orange County?

No, he lived, he lived like deep in the valley. And I was not that far, but it? No, he lived. He lived deep in the valley. And I was not that far, but I didn't have a car at the time. So that wasn't going to work out. I was like, 30 minutes. 30 minutes. And I didn't have a car at the time. So I was like, it's an expensive Uber. It's an expensive Uber for someone

that you're still trying to figure out. We hung out one more time, and then we both did the mutual ghosting. But I'm so curious, like maybe his perspective on it was like, I can't believe that girl exposing me on Cosmo. I want to know what day four looked like after your three exams. Well, I had to write the article.

I was under deadline. So like, I didn't even get to really like take a breath. My editor's like, okay, great. And then we need the article like end of day Monday. So I was like, I woke up like hungover in my apartment and just was like writing this article. And then they also were like, the text messages were coming in, like maintaining all the text messages.

Because some guys, I never heard from again after that. But others were like, hey, it's a great time. Like, can we go on a second date? Right. And so, yeah, and I decided, I made the decision that while I couldn't tell them about it on the first date, anyone that asked me on a second date, I told them about what it was. But I did say I was like, genuinely interested in you. I'd love to a chance to go on a second date

without, you know, without any articles being written, if you're down. And a lot of guys were really nice about it. And then some guys were like, really not okay about it. Like one guy got me kicked off a dating app that you needed an invitation for. Oh, we all know that one. That's what that one. That's what that is. Listen, you're married now. And Raya has never accepted me. So what?

No. Well, it was interesting as I never said Raya in the article. I never even said what dating app we met on. But he was so upset that I was like, I was writing an article even though I changed names and details that he went to Raya and reported me. Oh my God. And I'm like, that is so funny.

What a baby. What a literal baby. But I think Cosmo got me back. They reported me. Oh my God. And I'm like, that is so sweet. What a baby. What a literal baby. But I think Cosmo got me back. They got me back on my own. Did you broke his heart? He was in love at first sight for that guy. No, but it was one of those dates where he, I think he thought it was going really well.

And I was like, he should be paying me for that therapy session we just had. I think about that all the time. Right. We could only like invoice certain dates for their procession. Yeah. But it is such a thing where it's, and I think it's a trait that also you get with narcissists

where they're like dumping on you, they're telling you everything, they're not asking you any questions. They had, I don't think he could knows anything about me. Yeah, but I know it's my last name. Right, like where am I from? Yeah, every detail of his life and like unpacking like, you know, all these problems,

I thought that was just so nuts. So good ridden. So after the 30 dates and three days, you didn't give up. No. And then you had a 31st date, not having anything to do with this piece. Right. And what happened on your 31st date?

So it was technically my 31st first date. It was after, like, you know, because I did date some of these guys from the 30 dates for like a little bit, like went on second, third dates, whatever. So after that dust settled, I had also, I had stopped going on dating apps. But then one night, I was like, you know what,

I'm gonna go back on, I went on Bumble, I matched with this guy, and I was almost, I swiped left on him at first, because he didn't have the best pictures. But then I remembered I wrote an article on Cosmo where I did this thing and it actually worked where you should swipe right on guys that don't have the best profile pictures because straight men don't know how to take the best flattering photos of themselves.

Oh, so true. And it's also, you see people commenting that the best men are the ones without Instagram. Right, right, you don't know exactly. So it was literally this, like, there was like a weird, creepy, like, cubicle selfie of him and he probably, like, sent to a girl at one point, he looked good. There was a picture of him and another guy and this other guy was towering over him. So I'm like, either that guy's really tall or this guy's really short. I couldn't

tell. There was a picture of him with a dog and I'm like, that's not your dog. You know, like everything in the textbook of like what you should swipe left on. But there was something about his face and his smiley and one picture of him with the backwards, backwards baseball hat. And so that was a little kid that was always, I thought that was always so cute when guys were there having backwards. And so I was like, oh, you know what, he's kind of cute here when he was like being effortless. Like, and I could tell himself, so I was like, you know what, that was a mistake I should

swipe right. Oh, and also he worked in investment banking and my mom always said, stop dating men in the entertainment industry. I want you to date someone who works in a hedge fund, but she like doesn't know what a hedge fund is. So like to kind of spite my mom, I'm gonna go on a date with a guy who works in finance and prove to her that I have nothing in common with him

and there's no way this gonna work out just so she knows she's wrong. So I swipe right and we end up like really quickly like making first date plans and we have our first date and I notice. Where did you go on your first date? Employees only. Okay, this is a bar inarrow west out west Hollywood it's a great bar so they have a great happy hour to a golden hour but it was after that because he was

working late he was a little late to the date I had learned from the 38 some three days that date should be an hour first date should be an hour and if it if you have a good connection you can make it go longer but with the hour you have an easy out, because you're not committing for more than an hour. So I had made plans with a friend to go hang out with after, to hang out with a girlfriend. And so after the hour, he wasn't asking me any questions.

I thought he was cute, but I was like, something's off about this guy, and I couldn't find my finger on it. So I excuse myself to the bathroom. I said, I'm going to the bathroom. And when I come back, if you don't start asking me questions about myself I'm leaving They came back and he was like oh my god. I'm so sorry

I'm on like four hours of sleep. I wasn't even aware. I was doing that like let's take two and then it ended up being one of those Neverending dates and we're still dating to this day because that's my husband And now you got a right now. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,. So yeah, I guess give, I guess I gave them two chances. Like, second and third chances, but I'm happy I did, because, but I learned all of that. Like, I feel like you had to kind of, so much of dating is like doing it and like going on a date. Yeah, learning, you're learning like the red flags, but also the green flags.

I think a lot of girls that are trying to date ignore green flags because in our like, society right now with dating, it's like, oh red flag, bad guy, buzzword, narcissist. I mean, I use these words because I've dated them. But also, what about the green flags? What about the kind smile? What about the guy who's not really sure

to have to take a selfie because he doesn't do it very often. What about the guy holding the fish? That's a big problem. I have a soft spot for guys holding fish because I found out the background behind it is that a lot of time that's the only photo they have of themselves. You have a lot of fish.

I grew up fishing, it's like my favorite thing to do. And when I'm like the most natural happy person, there's usually a fish in the picture. So there you go. It's like, I'm looking through. Like after we had sex the first time, I looked at his Instagram again go. It's like, oh, look at this. Like after we had sex the first time, I looked at his Instagram again,

and I'm like, oh no. Oh, and I think I remember texting you and being like, look to your Instagram, and you're like, and you, I was like, and I hate it. I hate everything about it. Maybe you said you made it. I said, how much do you hate my Instagram?

Yeah, and I was like, no, I fucking hate it. Like a whole lot. But do you think you would like it? But it didn't deter me. Right, but would you like it more of his Instagram was like he was trying I fucking hate it, like a whole lot. But do you think you would like it? But it didn't deter me. But would you like it more of his Instagram was like, he was trying to be an influencer? No, you wouldn't be like, I would have never even, yeah.

I think I have 500 followers and 100 posts. Which I don't know, that's the big fact. That's a great flag though, I think. Yeah, I told you. So I love that I just think anyone truly looking for love, AKA people that are like, should I go on the Bachelor Red or the Bachelor right now? Listen to Gabby's advice.

Yeah. Read the book. Like, listen to Gabby's advice. She found her husband because she gave it another chance, just a little opportunity. And go on dates, you know. You miss 100% of the dates you don't go on. Ooh.

I'm the one who said the shots you don't take and the cast you don't make. Yeah. And there's actually a new dating app that I've been working with that I'm really, really excited to talk about. I wish they had it. I wish that this existed when I went on the 30 dates and three days. It's called First Rounds on Me, and it's an app that instead of endlessly swiping

it matches you with people that actually want to go get drinks with you. So if I was interested in a guy, I would be like, I would send him a date and time to go grab a drink. And if he was interested in me, he I would be like, I would send him a date and time to go grab a drink. And if he was interested in me, he would accept her, like, modified to fit his schedule, and the same thing. So it gets you out on these dates, and they also have an hour limit on the date.

So after an hour, they call you, and if you want to leave, you can leave. Oh, that's your best gift for all. They give you the app, gives you a rough gift for all. Give you a rough gift for all. Yeah, don't you wish? That's so cool. This was around when I really think

that this is going to completely change and disrupt dating. And it's like a newer app, so it's still coming out in cities. But it's in Los Angeles. And all my single friends, I'm like, you have to get on it. I want to know how this looks. Brilliant. I know. I was just telling a story the other day

about I'll make it very quick, because I'm not going to say who it is, but someone who's famous in LA that I dated for like casually dated for a minute. But I was telling someone the other day the story about how this was back in 2007. So like there was no Instagram, there were no dating apps like whatever. I met this guy. I was really drunk. I was 24 years old. Didn't even remember.

Like I remember meeting someone with his name, but I'm like, I don't know what the guy looks like. I don't really remember. But he had my number and then it was like, let's meet up at Firefly, which is a bar in the valley. So I go to Firefly and I have my girlfriend, and I'm like, okay, you call me in one hour. It was one hour, you call me, like you need something whatever.

I don't give a shit if he believes it or not. It's my out. And I walk into this bar and I realize. I don't give a shit if he believes it or not. It's my out. And I walk into this bar and I realize, I don't know what he looks like. So I retreat to the bathroom, get on the phone with my friend. Walk over to the bar, like we're in this really intense conversation and I'm like, I don't know what the fuck to look for.

Like a freaking out. And he starts waving his hands like, Kristen, Kristen, I was like, found the guy. All right, call me in 45 minutes or call me an hour. Yeah, um, luckily you ended up working out. I think it is for a for you know, it was again casual dating for a few months, but the phone a friend thing was so important. It's so essential and you got to keep yourself safe while dating and I did. Yeah, I had a friend Aaron and when she was dating, I was the person that I would always text her an hour in. She's like, I'm going to this place at this time I'm meeting this guy. This is what he looks like. Text me in an hour and if you don't hear

from me like, I should be at this location basically. And so I would do that and it really helped it really helped her out and she's now she's engaged, but she didn't meet him on a dating app. But still it's like it worked. Yeah, but still, it's like, it works. But she's in leather to her husband. So I so feel like going on as many dates as you can leads you to your partner if that's what you're looking for. Yeah. Also, except wedding invitations. Oh, that's how we met.

Oh. Seriously though. Some guys they happen to wedding, but I feel like they hear this from a lot of single dudes. Like, they find either a fucker or a lover. Oh. You'll find a star. Listen to Gabby's advice, like just take your shot and be safe because you don't want to be dating a serial killer.

You don't, which is I have a whole other podcast about that called Am I dating a serial killer? It's on Audible. There's 10 episodes you can listen to. And every episode, I interview someone who had like a date, a true date that sounds like possibly criminal, definitely true story. And they tell me about the experience,

and then I get someone that's a forensic scientist and someone who worked for the FBI to weigh in and kind of point out, okay, these are the actual red flags that you should be scared of, and also give them advice in some situations, these women, and then we're trying to still separate from the person and they'd be like, okay, well here's what you need to do to get out of it. So definitely trigger warning for that,

but I do think there's some really great advice in there on how to stay safe. Can you just give us like a little like a couple of tidbits that they would say are like, like, oh shit. Well, the biggest thing, which I'm definitely guilty of doing, is giving your phone number, because so many times on dating apps, you're like, it's so much easier to text, like here's my number, just text me. I've done it is giving your phone number. Because so many times on dating apps, it's so much easier to text. Like, here's my number, just text me.

I've done it every time. I've done it so many times. You can get a lot of personal information about someone with just their phone number, down to where they live, all their social media accounts, where the family lives, everything. So that's like the biggest thing for sure. And then also to do your, as I say, do diligence, do a background check, you could also do the same thing. So any information you have on someone from the dating

app, you can look up. And then the other big thing, which I don't think people do enough, if someone does something like harassing to you on a dating app, but they treat you badly on a dating app, something that is kind of like dangerous on it, you should always report that person because you can be saving others. I agree with that. And the same thing goes with if you get kissed on a date and you don't want to be kissed,

that's actually considered assault. And you can contact your local police officer and you could report that. And report to the dating app. And report to dating app. And in one situation, that happened to a girl and that guy who kissed her unwantingly ended up murdering people. Holy shit.

So if only she would, I'm not saying that if only, but if she did report him, who knows? For our listeners, really pay attention to this, you guys, because I do have a friend with somewhat of a similar story, like just a friend of mine, not even gonna say where she lives and what part of the country, but a friend of mine did meet someone and went on a few dates and ended up being assaulted,

essentially, and then found out that it was just this long list of horrific things that this person had done. You would never know in a million years. But I'm dating a serial killer is very... It's quite... And I'm dating a serial killer. Because it's a question that we festitiously ask ourselves when we're on a date. 1 million percentiously ask ourselves when we're like on a date.

1 million percent. Yeah. Every time I would ever go on a date is like what we talked about earlier. Like, ha ha ha. Yeah. I hope we doesn't murder me and like chop me into pieces and like bury me somewhere or throw me in a dumpster. Right.

Right. I feel like I've said that to every girlfriend about their own dates or mine when I was going on dates. Right. But it is unfortunately and very sadly it is a reality. And I think all you can do is just take these steps to really prepare yourself to go out there and be safe and be aware of your surroundings. And there's also a thing, there was a thing a while ago that was going viral called the

Angel Shot, which it's like a way you can order it. If you're uncomfortable on a date and you're at a bar, you could order a shot in different ways. Yes. To like let the bartender, like to make the bartender aware of that you're in an uncomfortable situation. And I actually did a report on this and it turns out like this is not a thing that a lot of bars know.

Barney's being rean West Hollywood actually made a poster in the women's bathroom that's still there to this day where they have their own system that they do. But other bars don't do it, but I did learn that, like, the safest way if you're ever in a date that you're uncomfortable on to go through the kitchen, because usually the kitchen has an exit, so you can safely exit, and also always let the bartender know.

You could just, you know, tell the bartender, and some bartender or waitress will, or waiter, will try to help you get out of the space. That's such, that's really great advice. Yeah. Did you just have the balls, though, to truly just walk into the kitchen. Walk into the kitchen. Be like, and just go and, hey, I need to go.

I'm so uncomfortable. Where's the back exit? I need to get out of it. I'm in danger. Where's the back exit? Yeah, no, I think that's God. I mean, I feel bad for telling that to a restaurant and they're so busy and you're like, just like, you're the exit. No, trust me, they would. I feel like every bar in restaurant would be like, wow, if we can help Yeah, they make us a safer community where people want to come and date here because they know that we protect

Right like all of our patrons. Yeah, exactly. I did see something like very quickly It was either on Instagram or TikTok, but it was um this British woman who got a team like she had a few security guards She was like mic'd up everything and decided she was I don't know what area of the UK this was in but it was a very busy bar area where a lot of sexual assault has happened right so she had this whole team like kind of looking out for her so she was very safe but she acted just absolutely annihilated wasted as hell on the corner like I'm looking for my text, and this guy ends up following her back to her hotel, like go to the hotel and they like obviously covers voice and

mask his face and whatnot. And literally keeps, she says I want to know I'm going to my hotel alone, he keeps following her. So because she does have security, because she saves, she lets him in the hotel room and then she immediately breaks character and says, why do you think that you were allowed here? I didn't ask you, I didn't invite you here. And he's like, well, I thought we were gonna have sex.

She's like, I never told you I wanted to have sex with you. Never told you I wanted to kiss you. And it was like, oh shit, moment. And obviously he left, she was safe, but it was such a wild experiment, because she was safe. So ladies, none of us are recommending you to like, don't put yourself in a good place.

Do this on your own. Yeah. But it's just to let you know that putting yourself in a vulnerable position, it's not your fault, it's their fault, but just be cautious. Well, and that also we have to remember that when you're meeting people on dating apps, they're strangers. Absolutely. And that now with, with AI,, it's easy to actually create.

That's a whole other thing. Oh, great shirt. And I wrote an article for Gide about this. And that's a whole other thing that people can create. We're using AI, like how convincing those photos are, how the lines are all, you can come up with pickup lines through AI. So people are using AI to create their dating app profiles.

And you can go on a date with this person, they look nothing like their pictures, or they found nothing like the person you've been communicating with So yeah, be extra careful on dating apps, but use them. Yeah, and go on the date, but be safe Yeah, but we still recommend dating we're please don't just giving you our perspective on the best way to go about it So you do find your person because Gabby found hers. Yeah on a dating app way to go about it so you do find your person because Gabby found hers. Yeah, on a dating app. Picture this. You're hanging out in your favorite spot, headphones on, and the world around you fades away.

When listening to Dipsy stories, you're immersed in a vivid world where every touch, every breath, every stolen glance is felt with breathtaking intensity. Dipsy is an app full of hundreds of short, sexy audio stories designed by women for women. They bring scenarios to life with immersive soundscapes and realistic characters. Discover stories about second-trans romances, adventurous vacation flings, and hot and heavy hookups. Radically inclusive, Dipsy has stories for a straight-and-queer listeners, and 56% of stories are voice acted by people of color.

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that's dipsystories.com slash Kristen. Enjoy. It's crazy. I never thought.com slash Kristen. Enjoy. It's crazy. I never thought it was gonna happen, honestly. I never thought I would meet someone that I would marry on a dating act. It's so amazing. I love it.

I want you to tell me now about this project of yours that Kristen was on with you. Yes, and you got a shout out on this project, too. I did get a shout out, so I'm here about this. Okay. I am so excited about this project. So this is coming out soon. Um, it's it's called bad influencer. I co-created it with Jane Green who's a New York Times best selling author. She's a legend. You have to read her book. She's incredibly talented. And I was so honored that she asked me to co-create this project with her. I wrote it and executive produced it. And Kristen has an amazing cameo. And so bad influencer is a bingeable nine part series

about a girl who's a nobody, who one day wakes up and she's a famous influencer and she's caught in like non-stop scandals. So it's very like all of like Tom Hanks and Bid sort of, right? So it's very much like big or 13 going on 30. And it's kind of different. I don't know if you've ever heard like a fiction podcast before, but the best way to describe it is rom-com for your ears.

And so much of like, when I don't know about you, but when I'm getting ready, I always have a TV show on in the background. Absolutely. And I watched like the entire series of Nip Talk that way, and I realized I missed things because there were all these visual cues I was missing. But the best thing about like a bingeable fiction series

like Bad Influencer is you could be doing whatever and you're not going to miss anything because all of the audio is right there. And when we release it October on October 3rd, all nine episodes are going to be there. And it's meant to be binge like you're watching your favorite new Netflix. Oh, awesome. That's great.

So yeah. And Kristen did such a good job. She plays the girl that you meet in the bathroom. As herself, she plays herself. Which is exactly who I am. I am the girl that you girls meet in the bathroom. And she gives great dating advice, but it turns out that the girl isn't actually

crying about a relationship breakup. She's actually crying about a friendship breakup, which Kristen also delivers amazing advice for. And we got a great shout out for sex love and what else matters. And Luke, you get a shout out too. Yeah. All right.

And Kristin joins also Duma, Perez Hilton, and Kristi Carlson Romano are also other celebrity. And everyone else is fiction characters. They're the only four people that play themselves. Okay, fantastic. And is it your voice? Are you the... No, I play a couple of characters throughout.

And I do some of, I'm gonna do some of the ads, and actually that's why, first round on me, they are sponsor, and it's the perfect match, because we do have an episode where we completely shit on dating apps, and so it's nice to kind of, we actually ended up working in sponsored content where the characters talk about this, they introduce the dating app, which is a real dating app,

and so it's kind of like old school radio theater, you know? For sure. But it works naturally in the show, and so I was really happy. I couldn't think of like a better sponsor. I know you must experience this too when you're finding sponsors for your podcast. You want to make sure it's like a brand

that you really love. That you think you feel, yeah. And you like feel passionate about. So it was like the perfect, perfect match. And I'm just so excited. So is first round on me the dating app, is that available now? Yes, it's available now in Los Angeles. Oh the perfect, perfect match. And I'm just. It's first round on me, the dating app. Is that available now? Yes, it's available now in Los Angeles. Oh my gosh. A bunch of other major cities. They are expanding.

And they also have their own podcast too. So they're fantastic. I am so excited because I talk to so many of my single girlfriends right now. And I was actually again, to Jared Freed, because you guys are comedians and whatever, but just talking to him about dating apps and how I love to play the game like for my friends. I'm like come on let me swipe like for me it's like a video game yeah even though it's like kind of real life but I love this idea of first rounds on me where you're literally like let's meet up. And all you're committing to is a drink. It's one hour. What and a drink could be

coffee whatever it's one hour. That's all you're committing to is a drink. It's one hour. And a drink could be coffee, whatever. It's one hour. That's all you're committing to, and you're fitting it into your schedules. And also the same time too, it's like designed to get you off the apps. Because so much of dating apps is pen pals. It's endless swiping, it's endless messaging.

Absolutely. I think five of my dates on 30 days and three days, I never met them. Because like, but it was still a date. Like we had a phone call or we were like, or that was like why I could have meet some of the dates because we were like trying to like coordinate it just because I had a lot of guys like I had five guys I think like like flake and all that kind of stuff. Yeah, they get cold feet. Yeah, they're like they're

they're suspicious though. I don't know. This girl talks about her dating life too much. I might have done it before. Yeah. You've done it once or twice. I've got a cold feet. Well, yeah, someone I met from the dating app. like you said, you're strangers. And sometimes you just get a weird feeling at some point and it's like, do I trust my gut or do I still go and sometimes where I trusted my gut and there've been times I've gone. So wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,

Luke, for you when you were on these dating apps, did you like actually just ghost or did you like? No, I'd cancel. Yeah, that's what I thought. I would just, like, there was one guy who canceled like an hour before, but that counted. I was like, I had a date.

He just didn't show up. He's like, oh, my cousin's something, mother, I remember you like posting one of the texts on the Cosmo thing. And he was like, oh, my mom just told me that my cousin's something or other family. I have a family, so I think this would be like, sorry, I know you're about to be in an hour.

You're like, I really don't need your backstory. That's a story. I'm good. I have so many other dates to go on. Yeah, you're like, I fear like, thank God, I can go home and relax. I'm so kind of so. So you would or would not recommend 30 dates in three days?

No, I would recommend going on dates. Just going on dates. I would recommend going on dates and I also would recommend like stop wasting your time on these pen pals. Yeah. I think like, and that was something that, and also that translates into,

I also remember dating a guy like having great first date, great second date, and then like the guy not disappearing, like Caspering, like friendly ghosting, where he would constantly, constantly text me, but I'd be like, okay, well when do you want to meet up? And like, they would never set plans. And I think that's another thing that happens to. Oh, it's so annoying.

And I wish, I think I learned later to let go of that. Yeah. But I think a lot of us, we waste, we miss opportunities in dating, we miss opportunities in putting ourselves out there because we're hung up on someone that isn't giving us anything or enough. Yes.

Oh, that is a fucking fantastic. Well, I'll also say from the male perspective that I have had throwing out dates, times, options like that and the response being, I barely know you, how do I contrast you and I'm like, well, I don't like what's going on. Yeah, what are we doing here? Yeah, exactly.

I've run into that before. Well, in that case, FaceTime dates. So like a first date, you do like a first date as a FaceTime. A lot of my friends do that. Yeah, in that case, FaceTime dates. So like a first date, if you do like a first date as a FaceTime, a lot of my friends do that. Yeah, we kind of picked that up in COVID. Yes. And I think it's something we should still do because that's a great like first date,

but then also trust your gut. If you are not getting a good feeling after that FaceTime, I learned this the hard way because I also wrote an article about that. Trust your gut, don't go on that date, but it makes a better first date if you do it and you have a connection. And you also know who you're talking to.

They look how they look. How do they look? And also, does their conversation match maybe the way that they type? And some people are different. Some people are way better at texting, being funny in their banter. But they're not as great in person.

Which maybe that's something that's okay with you. But for me, like if you're like this great texture, but yet we don't have a banter in real life, for me personally, I'm like, we done. Yeah. Like, on to the next thing. Well, I had that one of my 30 dates. We had the best textual chemistry, and it was all the textual chemistry. And it was a lot of build up too, which I think is the other issue.

When you don't want to date soon enough, you have so much build up. And then when you finally lot of build up too, which I think is the other issue. When you don't wanna date soon enough, you have so much build up. And then when you finally meet, you're like, oh, this is not as, we talked about everything. Expectations become unrealistic. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but he was like really low energy in person,

but really high energy on text. And I was like, did he also go on all these dates? Like, what are you going on? You're like, no, he's a pent up. No, that's how he is. Yeah, he's better expressing himself through text. But yeah, so it's like, you guys he's a pent up. That's how he is. Yeah, he's better expressing himself through text. But yeah, so it's like, you guys gotta give it a shot. You just have to give it a shot

because you can find your forever person. Yeah. If you're safe, but you definitely have to date. You're not gonna date by scrolling and harding and like not actually putting yourself out there. You have to be proactive, you have to set up the dates, you have to go on the dates. And another thing too, with my husband,

is he always made it really clear that he was into me. There was no, I think like I used to think in my 20s, that's why I dated 20 guys, was that I would always be like trying to decode these signs or I would try to figure out if a guy was like into me or not into me and I think they make it really clear when they're into you. And you also make it clear if you're into me, and I think they make it really clear when they're into you. And you also make it clear if you're into someone.

And I think that's a really great point though. And like, I remember in my 20s, like I was working at Sir, and I had this one girlfriend who's now married and has a baby, but like at the time she was the girl who was like, oh my God, so do I put like a smiley face or a winky face? Or what do I have?

And like having this panic attack of how to respond and I'm like, well, what do you want to do? And she's like, well, I don't know. I don't know what he's going to want me to do. How do I get him to respond? Because you need to find someone that likes you for who you are authentically yourself. And that was a thing that like after the 30 days

and three days, I cleaned up my dating at profile. And I made it like, I made it like this. I saw. Yeah. Well, that and then also being like, I'm like I saw yeah wish well that that and then also being like I'm I'm gonna be authentically myself on here I'm gonna put a John Mayer banter quote about how got your back love we've ended up being in our vows you know like I'm gonna be so authentically myself and I got

so many less matches but the matches I got were higher quality and my husband was one of those matches so I think I think we're so we, just like your friend was saying, like, we think we have to present ourselves in a way that's going to attract so many people or attract the one person that we want, but the right person will be attracted to who you are organically. Exactly. Exactly. And it's easier to find that person when you drop all the things that you're pretending to be and you be the real person that you are, you will attract the right person for you.

Because why would you want to attract person that you are, you will attract the right person for you. Because why would you wanna attract something else? Right, exactly. And so many dating experts tell you the opposite. They tell you they're these rules. They tell you to do this, do that, wait three days to text back like all that stuff. But the truth is, when you meet someone who's the right person for you, all those rules go out the window.

And it's all about being like organic and authentic and in the moment. And it's so obvious when you find the right person, which I didn't know in my 20s, because none of these guys were right, and I was trying to like figure it out with like the string theory board, like why is this not working?

But like, it was, because none of these, it was never easy. These were all massive obstacles for me that it was never easy until I found the right guy. Well, I think people want options, or they think they want options. They think they do. Well, dating actually, they think they want options. They think they do. Well, dating actually because they don't really know.

That the options are infinite, but really they're not, when you actually looked at it, how many people are actually on the app and want the same thing that you want, or are close to you, or have the same beliefs and likes as you. It's like a much smaller number that we think. Right, and it's better to have fewer options. I mean, that's like my business brain,

Chris, and kind of likes it, kind of hates it. But that's like Trader Joe's business model. I just get to say that. I never really, it's like, it's it. But that's like Trader Joe's business model. I just gonna say that. I know that it's like, it's why I can only shop at Trader Joe's. It's better that way. Because I get overwhelmed at any other like, I'm going to a Ralph's and I'm like,

oh my god, I don't even know where to begin. Yeah, it's too much. It's too much. Yeah. Do the Trader Joe's route on your dating apps. Yeah. That's what we're saying. Yeah, treat your matches like Trader Joe's.

Exactly. Although Trader Joe sometimes has like too many options, I noticed this, they have like three pitted Kamala olives. Yeah, I know. Like you're like, just give me one. Just give me one. That's the one. I would never look at those.

Yeah. Gavin and I aren't saying to find a guy from Indiana that's into like banking and business, but we are. We're a trader too. But we kind of are. Because that's what we both are. No, it doesn't work again.

It doesn't work for us, but I mean, look, it's like finding the right guy for you, finding the person, also the other thing is how many guys I dated that didn't accept me for who I was, who wanted me to be a version or they liked the idea of me or they wanted me to be someone that I wasn't. But that's so much of dating is that and so much.

And then also when you're in your 20s, you don't, or even anytime you're single, you don't know, you're figuring out your identity. Because so much of like a breakup, when you break up with someone, you're like, my identity was half of this couple, who am I now? And so figuring that out is just like, the whole other day.

Because you kind of lose yourself like in a relationship a bit. Yeah, you do. I definitely had my ex-boyfriend, like who I believed that he thought like I walked on water, right, in the beginning. And then we were together two years, but like as time went on, it was like,

I started hearing them like, no, I love you, but just like, be like a classier version of yourself. Ooh, I had one of those. I had a thought, like, I'm like, I'm sorry. Do you want my trashiest version to come out? Yeah. Because you just said that. Yeah. What? Yeah, I'm sorry. Do you want my trashyest version to come out? Because you just said that. I don't want.

Yeah, I did it in the dairy. I did a guy who was older than me and he wanted me to be like this like, J-Crew model. Basically, and that was not who I was. It was like early odds. It was like, was it 2010? And I was like really into American apparel,

like everything, you know, like kind of like emo. And that's who I was when I met him. But I remember he like, got into the so house and he's like, well, you can't dress like that at the so house. And like today, I'm like, I've gone to so house many times, dressed like, but Jim is like not a big deal.

Jim is with my laptop, like calm down. Like going to like a country club or something. Or I had to dress like that, but he could dress however he wanted. Yeah, no, yeah. And ladies and guys too, guys listening, like those people are not for you. If they're trying to change you, they're not for you. You also can see it in gift

giving. Like if they give you a gift, that's so not you, but a version of who they want you to be. Like that's such a, that's such a, like, an eye opener. That is such a fucking good point. Yeah. Looking back now, like, I'm. Thinking of the gifts that you're, yeah, because gift receiving is not a love language of mine but gift giving is a love language of mine. I'm not super cut. What is your love language? Do you even dare like talk about this? Yeah, I don't you know I

think it's like all of them. Yeah. I just had a girlfriend say this the other day. I really think it's all of them because I like my friend Brittany. Right. Yeah. Jackson Brittany we were talking about this and she goes you know, Jackson's, Jackson loves like giving me gifts. And she goes, which I love, but sometimes I just want this, you know,

like words of affirmation or whatever. Quality time. And I said, like, so what is your love language? And Brittany goes, you know what, damn it, I think it's all. And you deserve all of them. You definitely deserve all of them. Yeah, I'm not, I think it's a little bit about, I'd quality time is big for me.

And then also I think words of affirmation are big. Gifts are smaller, but also like don't miss a birthday gift. Don't miss a Christmas gift. Right. And it's not about the gifts. I don't need random gifts through all of the year, the price tag. Right. No, but I, I don't need gifts throughout, but I need gifts for the milestones and the important holidays. And what about him? Does he? Do you guys like to ever discuss this? I think we have. What does it like for him like dating or being married? Not dating. And I mean this is a wonderful way that came off so shitty. No, no, no, I get it. But like being now married, right? Yeah. No one you're fucking married. I know it's crazy. Does it feel does that feel different? No, no, because I think because we were living together before the marriage

and then also we were in the pandemic together Yeah, so it kind of it doesn't feel weird, but like remembering I'm married feels weird Yeah, you know what I mean like I have a husband a husband like yeah Okay, and then then also comes weird as the pressure of people being like well you're married now and you have a cat So what are their kids come? I have a cat. I'm gonna focus on the cat right now right you know about the late And for Darren being that he's like so not in your world work wise. Well, it's funny, he's become in my world in a weird way.

So when we started dating, he was working in finance. And on the side, he was working, he had a couple of classic cars that he would rent out on Turo, which is like Airbnb for cars. During the pandemic, he left finance and moved full time into the car business. So now he's like kind of entertainment industry adjacent because a lot of his cars are used in like on TV shows, music videos, wedding, all that kind of stuff.

So he kind of is like getting it. So I think he's always been interested in it, but it's nice to date someone who can be he's so logical, which I am very emotional. So it's really nice to have that balance. It's Luke and I to teach you. Yeah. To like bring me down to earth because I get so riled up about something and he's like, okay, well let's talk about like what's actually going on here and how we can solve these problems.

You just have to actually be willing to listen to me. Yeah. I don't, I, I, I, I, I just decide what I want to learn. I want to take you a cherry pick in it. Yeah. Um, but no, I think that's, think that was a really big change for me. And I think every guy I dated prior, we were both, there was always both arguing. And I know I'm Italian-American and I can't say.

It's like a Gemini rising. There's a lot going on here. So I need someone who can be like, OK, I'm going to be here. I'm very calm. I'm at a one. And I'm like, I'm a patient. Calm and patient. He's so patient. And supportive. And supportive. And I think so that's like a great balance.

You know what I just realized what you two and Rachel were in a comedy trip together. Yeah, right. All three of you will two out of three now are married to younger guys from Indiana. Oh, and now you're in your dating a young girl. Oh, right. And I mean, Jackson's married as well. And Jackson's married? Is he from Indiana? No, he's from New Jersey. But they're so perfect. They are like, they're beautiful. But she's like East Coast. Yeah, but that is really interesting.

That is interesting. That three out of the four of us are married to a younger guy from Indiana. It's why. Yeah, but just made that connection. Yeah. It's great, just texted me. Oh. The world is why. I's why. Yeah, it just made that connection. Yeah. It's Greg just texted me.

Oh. The world is why I love it. I love it. Okay, so I'm so excited about influencer you guys. I'm going to plug it here. We're going to give you a little teaser. It comes out October 3rd. And you could follow now, but yeah, definitely remember closer to the tape.

Yes. I mean, I'll be pushing this like all hell on my social media. Luke and I will bring this up together of course But I highly recommend everyone buying Gabby's book and if in French, you know if you want in French and not English You could have it both ways. It's 20 guys you date in your 20s and You definitely just Google 30 dates in three days. There's a YouTube But you can also just read Gabby's full article follow Gabby on social media,

and I have plans to work with you in the future. The same. On the feedery. We have more projects that are sleeve. Flat out, I've asked Gabby to help adapt my book. I want to, Chris and I am down. You can't think of anyone better. You can tell me what.

You can help me tell my story. Yes. The way that you tell stories. can help me tell my story. Yes. The way that you tell stories. Oh, thank you so much. Your future is so bright girl, I gotta wear a shade. Oh, well so is yours. So is yours too. I'm just so proud of you and I'm so excited

for a bad influencer and then everything else to come. Because I feel like every time I call or text you, you're like, oh my God, I have this new project. And I'm like, hell, yeah, you do. And it just having a friend like you makes me a better writer, like it makes me feel like there's so many more opportunities out there to spread my creative wings. Well, same to you, you know, you do so much.

Like when you look at all the things that you've done and continue to do, it's so incredibly inspirational. You are more than one thing, you know, just like the Barbie movie, you know? You're just like the Barbie movie. Just like the Barbie movie. You can be more than one type of Barbie, Kristen.

You know, I have actually been seeing the... So I think I'm gonna go see it by myself, but like I'm dying to see Kate McKinnon. You're gonna cry. You're not gonna go by yourself, don't lie. I've never been to a movie by myself, but I'm not gonna go with a movie by myself. I'm not gonna go with a movie by myself.

Yeah, it's so good. No, you get someone to go last, like. I can keep McKinnon as like the would be like, yeah, it's so good. I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like,

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I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like back to you. And you guys obviously we will link below Gabby's book and you please follow her on Instagram all social media platforms. Buy the book, listen to the podcast, get ready because shits about to go down. Yes it is. It's so nice meeting you. This has been so much fun. There's been so much fun. And we're

gonna have you on again. I would love whenever you want to have me. I'm here. Whenever I live very close to the studio. Yeah, Rachel gets your Sunday Oh my goodness. Oh, yeah, I haven't seen her in so long. So we'll do a little. A little reading. Yeah, for sure All right you guys don't forget rate us five stars follow bad influencer It's coming out very shortly by Gabby's book follow her and we love you and we will see you next week Make sure to follow us on social media Follow her and we love you and we will see you next week. Make sure to follow us on social media. You can follow me on all platforms at Kristen Dodie and follow Luke on Instagram at Luke Double underscore,

Broadway. Be sure to click the subscribe button so you can stay up to date with new episodes every single Wednesday. Thanks for listening. See you next week. every single Wednesday. Thanks for listening. See you next week.