Sex, Love, and What Else Matters - Awkward Hookups and Nudes from Exes

Episode Date: May 31, 2023

Episode 34. Ready for some awkward hookup stories? This week, Kristen and Luke talk about the top 4 questions asked by their friends and reveal some juicy stories from their own experiences. Kristen ...shares a revelation with Luke she had after texting with a friend, and they explain why “looking at each other with a good eye” is crucial. Sex talk: Does medication affect your libido? And, they discuss nudes from exes and what’s okay on social media. Thank you to our sponsor, Organifi! Head over to www.organifi.com/doute and use code DOUTE for 20% off your entire order. Don't wait - try Organifi today and take the first step towards a healthier you! Follow us: @kristendoute @luke__broderick Email us: sexlovepodcast@gmail.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 What's up, you little angels and your little devils out there? Welcome back to another episode of Sex Love and What else matters? Hi, Kristen. Hi, I don't know why I'm singing. Hello, Luky Boogie. Just excited to be here. I'm just so stoked. So you guys today will lose back in town. Luke is back in town. Why am I seeing? We're I'm a little like hyper. So we're going to do a little mishmash of topics today. Sexy and freaky to deep and unique. Today sound like Andy Cohen because I just
Starting point is 00:00:44 felt like it. Yeah, you did. You embodied him pretty well. Thank you so much. So Luke and I have spoken to some of our friends, men and women alike, and we asked them to help us with which topics they wanted to hear about to handle our little like hodgepodge today.
Starting point is 00:01:02 So that's kind of what we're gonna be covering, and it's going to be like some sex stuff, some relationship stuff and everything in between. Sound good, you ready to roll, babe? I'm ready. Hell's bells, yeah. So the first one I want to talk about, I read this to you earlier, Luke, friend of ours who is married, happily married, this is exactly what she texted me. Something that she and her husband always talk about is that they always try to look at each other with a good eye. And I was like, that sounds cute and trip, but like, what exactly does that mean? So then she continues. No stink, I. No stink, I. She says, which kind of means that we always assume that the
Starting point is 00:01:44 person is coming from a good place with good intentions, that they're always on your team, even if you're disagreeing. We think it's these single-handedly most important thing in a relationship. So maybe you could talk a little bit about how that one little shift kind of takes the edge off of everything, assuming the best of your partner. The only time we fight is when we don't. And my response was, holy fuck did that just hit home?
Starting point is 00:02:12 And then I said, I read it out loud to Luke in the car because I was pissy. I wasn't pissy when I read it too, but I had been pissy on a recent trip that we just took. So always look at your partner with a good eye. Always assume the best of your partner. So what I took out of that immediately was when you and I went a couple hours away,
Starting point is 00:02:39 and we had a little hotel night, we took the dogs, bed beach, blah, blah, blah, right? And I was so excited because you were only in town, well, you are only in town for a week and a half this time, and you really wanted to go golfing, so you got to go golfing that morning. And then we go to this little excursion for a day, and you had told me like you really wanted to kind of
Starting point is 00:03:03 like get out and be more outdoorsy and like everything you do in Colorado and typically we're stuck in this apartment together or like in the valley, right? So I was very excited about all those things. We get down there and Luke is tired. You've been driving a lot, you had an early tea time, then you drove all the way to said beach town. And I'm thinking, okay, I accept that you're tired. Like, you're right. You've had a long day and a lot of driving. However, I did not take you for your word. Essentially, it's like, look at you with a good eye. The way I read it is like, take you for your word, right? Right. You're tired. You told me you're tired. That's why you're
Starting point is 00:03:42 feeling the way you're feeling. That's why this is all happening. My, the Kristen and me, the me and me, was like, he's tired. But also, I'm tired sometimes. I get tired a lot. Does it mean I don't have fun? Does it mean I don't appreciate things? There's gotta be something else. He just doesn't want to hang out. Well, this is fucking bullshit. He, this, that, whatever. I don't know, all these stories I made up in my head, rather than just trusting as my partner, the love of my life, my teammate, my BFF, that you're just, this is what's happening. And this is just one example
Starting point is 00:04:16 because I could think of like a million others, but because this was so recent for us. Right, and it kind of created someone of a spiral and was just trying to express why I wasn't so shipper that day and Oh dear you Guess it didn't come across right and I'm appreciate you setting everything up for me and everything I just sometimes Me not looking at you with a good eye is the point of this I appreciate you saying thank you
Starting point is 00:04:43 I appreciate you saying thank you. I love you. But my point is in this, in our friend who wrote this text to me, I think about it. And she literally said, this is the only time that we fight is when they do not look at each other with that good eye, if you will. Right, you get caught up, you let the other, other things kind of fade that or block that perspective.
Starting point is 00:05:04 You need to just take a deep breath and take a step back and be like, okay, regardless of all these thoughts I'm having, this is what he or she said. Yeah, or the circumstances surrounding us or the bullshit going on in my life or like what I have to do tomorrow or whatever the fuck it is, right? It's just looking at that moment, that conversation,
Starting point is 00:05:24 that tiff, that whatever. And just saying, I know that you, Luke, you partner of mine, you know, whoever you guys are talking to. I know that I love you and I trust you and you love me and you trust and respect me. And we have this mutual adoration and respect for each other. So why, if something goes astray, something doesn't work out the way it's supposed to, because it's life, it's not perfect.
Starting point is 00:05:52 So if things don't go the way it's supposed to be, it's like, well, I know that had to be because of an accident or something happened. Like, it means like, you are always doing things purposefully to be kind to me, respectful, loving. Yeah, I didn't have malintentions. Malinty exactly. Yeah, yeah, didn't intend to drive the narrative
Starting point is 00:06:11 a certain direction or like hide something from you or just come up with. You literally, so for this example, you were tired and rather than just taking you for your word, that you were just fucking tired, I made up a thousand stories on top of the fact that you were tired, that we're not true. Yeah, of the fact that you were tired. They were not true. Yeah, well.
Starting point is 00:06:26 And I caused this grief. It's all right. We got over it. No, it's okay. I mean, you've done that ship before too. I can't think of one specific time at the moment. I'm just owning my own. Hey, sometimes I think this is probably common for everybody.
Starting point is 00:06:38 Sometimes you don't realize it in the moment, but you're just getting like a combative mood. My therapist and I talk about it. Like you take things out on the people that you're close as to, which are the exact people you probably shouldn't take things out on. Right. But it's the people you feel the most comfortable with.
Starting point is 00:06:53 So I think if we can all try to take our friends advice and her question that she wanted us to talk about on this podcast, and just think, when it's your partner, your teammate, your best friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, whatever partner, podcast and just think, when it's your partner, your teammate, your best friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, whatever partner, and you just say, you know what, I'm gonna look at them with a good eye. Maybe the world would be a fucking happier place,
Starting point is 00:07:13 you know what I mean, Jelly Bean? I think it would. Rock and roll, who'd you call? Okay, well, now we're gonna very much switch gears. Because another friend texts me this. He said, I want you guys to discuss awkward, slash funny hookup stories. Okay, I've got some of those.
Starting point is 00:07:30 I can't even tell who you go first. Do you want me to go? Yeah, I definitely want you to go first. So I had a good college experience. I'll just start with that. There's one summer that I spent a couple of months at my parents' place and I had some girls over with some friends and we were drinking and by the end of the night
Starting point is 00:07:49 kind of winding down and squirrels coming back with me to my room and I am very inebriated. Let's put that out there. So, you start kissing. How old are you? That was 21. So, start kissing and stuff. Anyway, it's kind of a blur in the memory
Starting point is 00:08:04 but I very much remember standing up on the bed to put a condom on for some reason. I can't tell you why. But. Standing up on your bed in order to put the condom on. Yeah, I can't explain it, but. I mean, thank you for the visual. We can all picture.
Starting point is 00:08:20 So I stand up to do this. And as I'm in progress, I lose my balance, fall off the bed, and hit my head on the wall hard enough. Apparently people upstairs heard, but I'll get to that point. It's like this. Boom, yeah, thud.
Starting point is 00:08:34 I pop back up immediately, you know, jump back into bed and I'm like, I'm good. Recovery. Yeah. And then the inebriation or, you know, activity, I didn't hear the footsteps coming down the stairs. So, I hear like a one knock on the door and then the handle turn.
Starting point is 00:08:51 And as that happens, of course, we throw the sheets up, my mom steps in and goes, is everyone okay, oh my, okay, have fun and shut the door and then with the other direction. I was like, oh my goodness. She goes, oh my, I can totally picture your cute I was like, oh my goodness. She goes, oh my. I can totally picture your cute mom being like, oh my.
Starting point is 00:09:10 Okay, everyone's good, okay great. Everyone's okay, yeah, you guys all look conscious. Yeah, so. Oh my gosh. Yeah, that kind of killed the mood and yeah, made for a good story, I guess. It is a really good story. I can't think of one time that my mom has ever
Starting point is 00:09:25 walked in for sure. She's never walked in on me and anybody. One time she walked in just like, I have my boyfriend laying in bed with me, but I was like, older, I was like 18 or 19. Yeah. And she was like, you have to leave the door open when boys are in your room. I was like, I can legally vote. So no, I don't mom. She's like, well, then move out. And I was like, fine. So I did. But any home, that's a whole other story. That's amazing. It was. Did you end up dating that girl? Or you just, you, well, you guys, wait, you didn't finish the deed or you did, you didn't finish the story. We did not finish the deed. I believe there was a further attempt, but the inebriation won that battle. There was some parts weren't working the way they were supposed to.
Starting point is 00:10:08 And they called Whiskey did. We did try to hang out one of their time, and it was very awkward. Were you standing on the bed? No, there was no. We didn't even get to any kind of act because it was just awkward. Ox, you know. Well, hey, random girl, if you'd liked me and our podcast, hit us up at sexlopuckestagymil.com. I mean, my story's like not as good as yours.
Starting point is 00:10:33 She was still pretty good. I feel like I probably had a lot of weird, like I can for a fact say I've said my ex's name in bed with someone else before. So mine, Luke knows the story. Yes, I loved the thought process of how this came to be. It's very me of me again. And if any of you have read my book, he's making you crazy. It's available on Amazon if you have not. It is chapter nine and it's called Three's Crowd. So I will
Starting point is 00:11:03 shorten it for you. I was going to read a little excerpt from my book, but I decided let's just tell the story. So essentially what happened was this was in 2005. What was tour? I was trying to give the date, but 2005, I was 22 years old living in Ocean City, Maryland, Ocean City, and for those of you East coasters, I worked at Seacrests, sure did. That is a beach bar that's three blocks long, and I was a bay waitress for five
Starting point is 00:11:33 seconds. My boyfriend was a BHDJ shocking, and there was a very gorgeous girl that worked at the bar as well with us. We were all friends. We had like a nice little group of friends and I started feeling at some point like he was looking at her differently. Like he wasn't paying as much attention to me and I'm like, bro, you drove me out here from Michigan like with the fuck. So she was so great to me and she was such a good friend.
Starting point is 00:11:59 I was just like, oh, how do I, how do I figure this out without like, almost like, I didn't want to hurt her feelings now that I think about it. Like if I asked him, I knew it'd out without like, almost like I didn't want to hurt her feelings now that I think about it. Like if I asked him, I knew it'd be a fucking liar, but I didn't want to hurt her feelings. So what did I do? I solicited a threesome.
Starting point is 00:12:12 And that was a, on his birthday. It's quite the bold strategy. I figured, detective Doty figured, that if I could witness their flirtation plus right in front of my very eyes like how can you even deny that boyfriend? How can you possibly deny? If I solicit the threesome and you guys look far too comfortable are your way to into it? That made perfect sense to me. Now hindsight as you grow an adult like of course if I were to solicit a threesome with a hot girl my boyfriend's like are
Starting point is 00:12:43 you fucking kidding me? Of course I'm gonna into it, right? But any hit. So basically what happened was I got as humanly drunk as possible, as I literally was doing shots of like flavored vodka, chasing it with like sprite or red bill or something. And we all went back to her, like condo apartment thing. And I just started flirting with her and then she started kissing me, or who kissed who first, I don't know, but basically I did everything you can do with a girl, except for sistering that night.
Starting point is 00:13:15 So we did the fingers and the mouth, and the VJ and all the stuff. And that was just she and I. Like he was not even, I don't even recall him being in the room. And I just suddenly realized like, holy shit, homegirls into me. Like, she's into me, not him. Like, what was I thinking?
Starting point is 00:13:35 Like, a bored mission. This is, oh my god, I'm such an idiot. Why would I ever think in a million years he would be like that? Story doesn't end there. Story ends with cut to, you know, summer's coming to an end, like we're all saying our goodbyes and people are moving on
Starting point is 00:13:50 to like greener pastures or like moving out of state. And that night as we're all like partying, he leaves, I'm like out with our friends, still like hanging out. And I get back to our condo and I shat you not there is a note in the door, essentially saying like, we had a good run, didn't realize I had feelings for her. And you've made me realize it with all of a shit backed up.
Starting point is 00:14:17 You stupid son of a bitch. Did I make that there be some happen? I'm definitely backfire. You can't make this stuff up. Like it's wild, it's wild. It's wild. But you were either right or you accidentally set them up by our suspicion, right?
Starting point is 00:14:32 Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So I mean, they were obviously not together or anything. And strangely, so this was 18 years ago. And she texted me not that long ago. I remember you saying that. I was like, oh my god, I still had her number saved somehow. Is iPhones or Wild how they work like that?
Starting point is 00:14:49 Like I haven't talked to this girl. I didn't even have an iPhone then. I don't even know how that happened. Well if your number didn't change, like I still have all my choice. That's true. Oh, weird. Anywho, I feel like I should text her back.
Starting point is 00:15:01 Yeah, do you? Should I text her? Get her on the podcast. That would be so fun. Okay rock and roll. Anyway, that's my story. Yourself, your body, wellness, babes. Okay, so if you're looking for a way to support your overall health and well-being, listen up. Also, your sexual well-being. Organifi is your new bestie. Trust me. Yep, I said sexual well-being. But first, I'm a superfood girl, as you guys know. And Organifi has high quality superfood buns. I've
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Starting point is 00:16:01 We live in a society running on cortisol and we don't give ourselves enough opportunities to reset. Ashwagandha can improve sexual function, even under stress by improving blood circulation. As we all know, how important blood flow is down there. Hello. Bottom line, organify is packed with organic greens, herbs, and other superfoods to help you feel energized and refreshed. Organifi also offers a range of other blends to support your health goals from the Red Juice Blend for anti-oxidant support
Starting point is 00:16:31 to the Gold Blend for restful sleep. I love you guys, so pay attention. Superfoods can be pricey, but with me you're not going to break the bank. Head over to organifi.com that's organifi.com slash Dodie and use code Dodie. D-O-U-T-E for 20% off all your entire order. You're welcome. Do you have any other stories? I definitely don't have any stories that can compare to the last one, but I have some funny locations
Starting point is 00:16:57 and some decent stories, I guess. Locations? Yeah, locations. So, like public. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, tell me, tell me. Yep, so, all right, set the scene. I get Like public? Yeah, yeah. Okay, tell me. Yep. So, all right, set the scene.
Starting point is 00:17:06 I get back from my classes in college. I think I had another class at the day. Anyway, whatever I ate, some lunch got really stoned. And then I get a text from this girl I'd been hooking up with. Occasionally, it happened a couple times before and she said, what are you doing? I was like, nothing I'm a home. And she said, meet me at the atrium.
Starting point is 00:17:21 So the atrium is kind of like a campus food court. There's a bunch of people there, and this is probably towards the end of lunch hour, like one, between one and two. And I head over there. I'm like, okay, what's gonna happen here? And I'm all high. Wait, what did you think?
Starting point is 00:17:36 I mean, she kind of only hit me up for sex at this point. But she's like basically like meet me for lunch, or for meet me at this spot that has lunch available. Right. She didn't tell me what was what was going on. So I show up. She's thinking you were meeting her for lunch. I didn't know what to expect. Okay. Keep going. I just eaten, but I do remember the thought going through my head. I guess I could do you.
Starting point is 00:17:57 No, you were stolen. Do you probably could eat again? Exactly. Exactly. So anyway, I get there. And as I walk in the door, she grabs my hand, leads me up the stairs, and says, wait here. I'm like, okay, she goes into the girls' bathroom, comes back out, grabs my hand, and pulls me into the girls' bathroom. We go to a handicapped stall,
Starting point is 00:18:13 there's no one else in there at the time. So this is a multiple, I just need to paint the picture for myself and listeners, but for me mostly. So this is a multiple stall public restroom on campus. Yeah, there were probably like eight stalls. And you can't like lock the main door. No. Oh, spicy.
Starting point is 00:18:31 Okay, you go. So we go to handicap stall and she starts going down on me. And I'm like, I'm like, okay, this is pretty cool. This is pretty awesome. And then someone walks in the door and you can hear them go to the bathroom and wash their hands. And then two other people walk in and you hear them talking all while she's, you know. She's going down in the, yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:49 Was she like, and you were like, oh, or how did I wait to, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, men moaned. I definitely kept my noise to a minimum but had concerns about her exposing up. But uh, yeah, we moved on to, yeah, some intercourse, you could say. A Dobby style. Yeah, standing up. Anyway.
Starting point is 00:19:09 How are you not like smack, smack, smack? And then something's something, what if someone like pooped next to you? Thank God they didn't. But they didn't, and we go through, get the deed done. And she goes and checks to see if the coast is clear and pulls me out of there. And that's like one of my coolest college experiences.
Starting point is 00:19:25 I mean that's pretty fun. It was fun. It was. Did you both come? I know I did but I don't know if I could actually like. You know, I'm gonna say she probably didn't but she probably still got a lot of satisfaction because she coctored this whole idea. That's true. And like yeah put it all together. Just the thought with yeah the thoughts like pretty hot. Yeah, it was fun. Okay, so we had to get back through the girl. If you're listening to sex love and what else matters, we'd love to have you on the block. Did you date her?
Starting point is 00:19:54 We did not date. We almost dated. It's, I'll give a quick rundown of that. We had been just hook up buddies and we go on, going on spring break with a big group of friends and she rides down with me in my truck and start saying some things, makes me think. Just the two of you. No, there were two people in the back, but we drove through the night and they were asleep. But she started saying some things like,
Starting point is 00:20:12 you know, why don't you want to date me? And I'm like, well, that's never been a conversation. I thought you didn't want to date at all. And she's like, well, you know, I don't know. Grabbed my hands, holds my hand. We get down there, we've got our room together on spring break. Oh, it was like sweet. When you said grab your hand, I was like, oh boy, here we go. Like hold my hand. No, that's really sweet. So she like, you guys liked each other.
Starting point is 00:20:31 Yeah. And so we get down there. It's like, okay, well, you know, we have awesome sex and we get, hang out with the same group of friends. This could work. And after a week of, what you could imagine college spring break is like, and us staying together. A mess. a hot mess. Yeah. The last day we're there though, her ex-boyfriend, I think from high school or from years back, his college spring break overlaps
Starting point is 00:20:54 and he shows up there for the last night. And she kinda just up and disappears from me and stays in his room that night. So she left ya? Yeah, she just bailed. And it bailed for the ex. This stung a little, I didn't let her ride in the truck back with me. I told her ride in the other car. And our group of friends, okay, did she like stay on spring break? Or did she actually go home or do you even know? No, she went back, but I guess I do remember
Starting point is 00:21:19 she like came like she was going to get in the truck. I'm like, no, you're not riding back with me. You crazy? Oh, salty. Yeah, I mean, it's like broken down this wall that I had up and everything was good. And then goes and does that, I'm just like, uh. Okay, wait, I have a quick question though, just to play the devil's advocate. Let's say shoes on the other foot, right? Tables are turned. Let's just say, you're looking at me like, hmm, but let's just say, you are on spring break
Starting point is 00:21:45 with this girl, right? But then your ex-girlfriend shows up, who you were like very much in love with, right? You've talked about it in the podcast previously, it was your first love from high school to college. You guys broke up. So let's just say that girl comes on spring break and is like wooing you.
Starting point is 00:22:03 And you are like so wooed, you hook up with her, but let's say spring break girl, I like my pseudonyms today. Spring break girl drove you. What would you do? Would you be like, oh, it's just my ex girlfriend, can I still ride back with you? No, I mean, that situation wouldn't have happened.
Starting point is 00:22:21 I guess the way that walls work in my mind is like you put walls up, you take them down, and when taking that wall down, put up a wall to other girls, because we were staying in the same room for a week. You know what I mean? We were staying together for a week. We were like, rode down there together.
Starting point is 00:22:34 It felt more boyfriend, girlfriendy. It hadn't been that discussion, but then did just up and without saying anything, go to this other guy's room. Grand, we were all drunk and stay there for the night. And then come back, I think if you like she even told another girl in the group, yeah, we fucked about this other guy. I was just like, yeah, not okay with me.
Starting point is 00:22:53 I feel those years are just so like odd. And where you just made me think of like a high school thing, also in my book, when I was a senior in high school, which is different, but I broke my ex-boyfriends' nose because I walked in and I'm fucking another girl, full-on naked and it was right before spring break. And then we went on spring break and obviously we are not together, right? And he's like dating this other girl and he was like with her on spring break, you know? Like they were like a thing and I was like, you know, fuck that girl. She's like not in our crew.
Starting point is 00:23:21 And we went with like, I mean there had to be 30 people in our group guys and girls like it two different hotels However, I still made out with my ex-boyfriend on that on that trip. Okay, so I don't know I feel like spring breaks just so messy. It definitely is. I will say so a good story though. Yeah, like a year later I didn't take a year to get over it. We were all in the same friend group whatever got over it a year later We hooked up a couple more times Yeah,, that's all good. She's happily married with a kid now. We won't have her on the podcast. Okay, next topic, and this one like takes a turn again, but it'll be brief, but I found it to be interesting and important, and I had three friends of mine in a group chat text me.
Starting point is 00:24:05 So it's myself, two girls and a guy. And they text me wanting to talk about into depressants and how it creates a low sex drive, et cetera. And that was something, okay, as someone who is on Lexipro, I've been taking it for two years. I find it to be extremely helpful. It's a serotonin inhibitor essentially. And I have never asked that question to my doctor
Starting point is 00:24:31 and never thought it was even a thing. But when they brought this up to me in a text message that I was like, holy shit, that's so interesting. And all three of them have experiences with Luxe de Pro and also the other antidepressants and said that, yeah, my guy friend said in low doses, it did not affect him as much, but about a decade ago when he was on higher doses, he was like, little man struggled hard. And I was like, oh, you want to be like little?
Starting point is 00:25:02 You should have. I know I should have missed opportunity. No, but for reals. So I thought that was really interesting because I definitely noticed like my brain thinks sex, sex, sex all the time, especially with you Luke, you know, and we've been dating. Well, our sex aversory is coming up. It is. Yeah, it's a few days.
Starting point is 00:25:22 A few days. June 4th. I think it's Sunday. It's our sex of nursery. It is. That's so hot. Shout out to sex of our series. But I definitely have noticed, even though I've been on Luxe Prof. for two years, and you and I have only been having sex for a year, that there are days where my brain thinks sex, you're coming in town, I'm like, we're going to a hotel. Oh my god. And then it's like, when we're having sex, I'm having the best time ever.
Starting point is 00:25:47 But there's this weird disconnect between my brain and my vagina brain. You know, my head brain and my vagina brain. I can see it. My vagina is all about it. My vagina brain is like, I don't know if I really feel it today. Yeah, most of the time. I'm gonna ask my doctor about my vagina brain.
Starting point is 00:26:04 Yeah, and I have guy friends that have experienced the same thing. Yeah, you told me one of your friends was taking like an anxiety medication for like concussions or something? Yeah, after concussions, or multiple concussions, you especially have some anxiety and depression and things and they were taking that and their early 20s. San X maybe or something like that. I think it was San X. Yeah, and so yeah, they just said he's like, or something like that. I think it was Zanex. Yeah, and so, yeah, he just said,
Starting point is 00:26:26 he's like, I wanna be there and I'll be in the situation with a tractor girl, huh? Yeah, like 22 or early 20s. Yeah, when your libido is like fucking flexin'. Right, and it just like, it just doesn't work. He's like, I can't get aroused when I'm taking my medication and his medication. I think was Zanex, something to that effect.
Starting point is 00:26:44 And so that stuck with me and I have another friend who he and his fiance have troubles, his fiance is on an antidepressant and similar type thing, just doesn't get the lady boners. Yeah, super into him like the way I'm, you know, it's just, yeah, it's like the lack of the lady boner. Yeah, she's obviously very into him. She loves him with everything, but just doesn't. And I'm not willing to like go lack of the lady boner. Yeah, she's obviously very into them. She loves them with everything, but just doesn't.
Starting point is 00:27:06 And I'm not willing to go off of my medication in order to appease my lady boner. I just feel like I want to ask my doctor, again, how do I get my vagina brain to start working? Yeah. It's a good question. Lady boner people's vagina brain. So we are not doctors.
Starting point is 00:27:19 No, we are not. I should have prefaced this. You guys, we know we're not fucking doctors. We're not psychiatrists. I'm just speaking from personal experience on medication that I'm on. Luke is speaking from the experience of the friends that have told him.
Starting point is 00:27:30 So I just thought I was an interesting topic and we're just talking about what our friends asked us to pitch posh on. So we'd love to hear all of your comments below about all of these things. Okay, lastly, again, taking a hard turn. A girlfriend of mine texts me asking about deleting photos off of your phone, possibly nudes
Starting point is 00:27:53 when you have a current significant other, or is that a pass? And then I added to this just photos of your exes on social media. So like when you are dating someone new, right? You have a new boyfriend, girlfriend, whatever. Should you delete photos of your ex off of your phone, slash and or your social media
Starting point is 00:28:14 and then nudes and or regular. So it's kind of like a multifaceted question. What do you think? I think 100% nudes, if you are entered into a relationship, you want to go long-term, just maybe it's some past trouble I've gotten in another relationship. I guess my question is, so I hate dick picks.
Starting point is 00:28:32 Again, I have a chapter in my book, he's making you crazy available. My name is on called dick picks and how much I hate them. So I, as a girl, it's very different. I'd rather get boob photos to be honest like that. Yeah, me too. Right, so I get the way guys are much more visual as well.
Starting point is 00:28:49 That's a scientific thing, right? Right. But once you're broken up with a girlfriend, do you go back through your phone searching for all these photos you might have in deleting them? No, I'm not saying all the photos, but if you know where you kept some nudes from your last relationship that you know we're sent to you. Let me remember you kept them. Well you kind of like you know how to find them.
Starting point is 00:29:11 How? I've got a photo for you. Well I have okay I have I'm looking at my phone right now. I have 100 to 2,761 photos. I have 10,455 videos on my phone. Okay, that's a lot more than probably the average person. Yeah, well, maybe not, I don't know. I mean, there are a lot of screenshots and probably duplicates. My point is, I know that I have photos of my exes on there. I don't go back and look at them, you know?
Starting point is 00:29:39 Well, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm only talking about the nudes. I don't think there's anything about past relationships. Those are still memories. You know, like, it doesn't have to be deleted from your history. It is there. It is part of you. My thing is I'm just too lazy to go back and delete all of them. Okay. Well that's just fine.
Starting point is 00:29:57 That doesn't bother me. And I don't, I think this is more like a female to male driven thing. It really is. Hey wait, now my brain's going, okay. Let me ask this. So one of my ex-boyfriends would go out of town a lot for work. I wouldn't get dick picks, but I would get like, we would send each other like selfies
Starting point is 00:30:15 or like sexy selfies, right? I never once downloaded that like two of my photos. It was just in our text thread. So therefore, basically, it's gone. Do men would you speak for yourself, I guess? Would you put that into your photo role? 100% okay. Yeah, I want to look at a sexy picture. You sent me. I want to go back on it someday, especially with our Distance situation when we're apart. Of course, I want to see some sexy pictures. Is that why scummed of all face, or screen recorded his face time?
Starting point is 00:30:48 Probably. Or just some, let's go back to us. I do think some guys that do have their secret photo folders and stuff and they like have a way to hide it if you want to roll the dice with that. Wait, what do you call that? There's like a, there's a term for it, like your spam, or your junk trunk, or your... The junk trunk. Not junk trunk. There's a term for it, like your spam, or your junk trunk, or your... The junk trunk. Not junk trunk.
Starting point is 00:31:07 There's a term for it, your spank, spank, spank. Spank, spank, yeah, that's true. That's what it's called. So is that like your spank, spank? Sort of. For some people, yeah, I'm sure they have their spank, spank. Actually, I know a man that do. So do you think as a man then, because I feel like you're right,
Starting point is 00:31:24 I think my opinion is quite different. So as a dude, do you think you should, then, because I feel like you're right, I think my opinion is quite different. So as a dude, do you think you should or men should be deleting photos of their exes, tatas, and Vijayjays off of their phone when they're dating someone new? I wouldn't even know if you had photos. Yeah, because yeah, you haven't gone through my phone. You've had opportunities, but I know you just trust me, which is great. But I do. If I were't gone through my phone. You've had opportunities, but I know you just trust me, which is great. But I do. If I were to go through your phone,
Starting point is 00:31:48 you wouldn't find anything. And go back to like, you know, years past when I see Tata photos or VJJ photos. No, you would not find anything. Okay. And that's just a me thing. I think it may be his case by case, but I truly feel strongly that if you want your relationship
Starting point is 00:32:02 to work, you do not need to keep that stuff. You got it up in your head. You should be able to recall some memories and stuff. Yeah, you're right. It's not a necessary. It's not a bad thing. The original question. Yeah. I think it's weird as fuck that you would keep a dick pic or like videos or sexy photos of your ex when you're happily in a new relationship. Agreed. What about social media? So now we're not talking about newties, but like your social media. Should you delete photos of your acts on your social? Does it bother you in your way? I think it's the way. It's also very case by case, not everyone's
Starting point is 00:32:31 like heavy into social media. Like your social media platform is like part of your business as well as like who you are. And so I do think that there are maybe some times or some specific things that you'd want to, but ultimately, like... Well, yeah, like my XP for you, that shit's long gone. Right. Because he sucks. But I will say, like, another X that I have
Starting point is 00:32:52 from, you know, years, many years ago, I'm sure, I don't know for a fact, but I'm sure there's still photos of him in my social media because I just didn't think about deleting it at the time because we didn't end,'t end in a gross fashion. So I was just kind of like whatever, and I have so many things on Instagram that I was, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:33:11 Right, but if you had, think about this, if you have a boyfriend that has a total of 100 posts and 30 of them are with their ex, and it's like, you open their page, because you will sometimes, and it's just like a bunch of pictures of them with his last girl. Exactly, and so, I mean, I don't go scrolling through your page all the time, but if that was the thing, I see just you with some other guy making out all the time on your page that just like, I'm gonna leave it all up.
Starting point is 00:33:34 That's the guy and I still thought that you might have some feelings for them. Like, if they had broken up with you and I felt like there might still be something there, I wouldn't like it. Not saying I would tell you to delete them, but I'll tell you that I wouldn't like it. So the answer is, delete the titty pics,
Starting point is 00:33:48 the VJ pics, never have a dick pic. And everything else, you just need to have a good eye with your partner. Just like, don't fuck with your relationship, you know? So I don't know. I think nudes are not a whole past. I think there's no reason to have nudes. I agree. I think we agree, right? Yep. Killer. All right. Well, babe, this has been super fun. Yes. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:12 Yeah. You got pause. It has. So I have one last question for you. I think I know what it is. You do? Yeah. You want to do it with me then? Three, two, one. I would do anything for love, but I won't do that. Oh yeah, I did that. I won't do heroin. Okay, I like that. I agree.
Starting point is 00:34:35 I too would not do heroin. My answer this time around was, I won't do cats. And by that I mean, I will not be with someone who has a cat because I'm deathly allergic. Can't do cats. Okay, cats in heroin. Cats in heroin. It's a new album title, watch for it.
Starting point is 00:34:49 I feel like yes. If you guys steal that, I'm gonna fucking trademark it. Okay, we'll be love you and please listen in tomorrow for our, it all happened, Vandipum Bruce. Vandipum Recap, I'm back on it. Luke is gonna join. And we will talk to you I'm back on it. Luke is going to join. We will talk to you next week on Sex Love and What Else Matters. Thanks for listening.
Starting point is 00:35:10 Bye. Make sure to follow us on social media. You can follow me on all platforms at Kristen Dodie and follow Luke on Instagram at LukeDoubleUnderScoreBroadred. Be sure to click the subscribe button so you can stay up to date with new episodes every single Wednesday. Thanks for listening. See you next week.

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