Sex, Love, and What Else Matters - Group Chat Energy with Zack Wickham

Episode Date: August 23, 2025

Episode 165. This week on the pod, Kristen and Luke are joined by their bestie Zack Wickham for a hilarious, unfiltered chat that spirals from travel pet peeves to Taylor Swift wisdom. The trio dives into: ·      Whether Kristen is actually a good travel companion ·      What it’s like traveling with the one and only Kaia ·      Zack’s journey on GLP-1s and how it’s changed the way he sees himself ·      Why Kristen suddenly hates going out and the Olympic-level excuses she’s mastered to avoid it 😅 ·      Introverts vs. extroverts: who really has it harder? ·      The pressure to look a certain way online—and how real people are dealing with it ·      Plus: Should you run your social posts past your partner before hitting “share”? It's real talk, laugh-out-loud moments, and a whole lotta friendship energy. Sponsors: Nutrafol: For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code DOUTE. TruDiagnostic: If you’re serious about living healthier and longer visit TruDiagnostic.com and use my code KRISTEN for 20% off your entire order or subscription. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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We're welcome back to another episode of Balancing Act. Whoop. You know that voice It's me That's not the voice I was talking about The loud guy I didn't even talk yet And I'm already getting called out

I don't like it I don't like this ganging up on me My best friend And your favorite cast member From the Valley Zach Wickham But you're my favorite cast member Oh my god thank you

Well Oh sorry Lou I don't think we were supposed to say cast I always say favorite friend member We're let's be real Just say best friend yeah or whatever Anyway. I always say that you're my favorite when people ask. And when people ask me, I always say you're my favorite.

Because I can't say Luke's chopped liver over here, clearly. Sorry. But I don't say you. Like, it's obviously you. I have engaged to you. Sometimes it's not obvious. We have a child together. I mean, I have to agree with him.

Sometimes. Wait, what did you say? Sometimes it's not obvious. I don't think I'm always your favorite. When I'm hormonal, when I'm anxious. When I'm out of town. So 87% of the time. No, I'm just.

I'm kidding. You're always my favorite. I just show it in a weird way. Let's be real. We're all each other's favorites. Oh, my goodness gracious. Well, I'm my favorite, so I've got that going for me. He's supporting himself.

I love self-love. Self-love Luke. Self-love Luke. Alarious. Brought to you by self-love Luke. Luke, do you know that this past month is the longest that Zach and I have not, have gone without seeing each other other than COVID? No, COVID.

In which COVID, we actually saw each other. No, that's what I said. Starting in COVID, this was the longest we'd ever been away. The record before this was 11 days. And that was like two years ago, a year ago, something. No, when I was on the go. So maybe like a couple, maybe two weeks or something. So like, yeah, like 14, 15 days.

This was a solid, how many days? 30. It was a month. It was a month. Wow. So you took over now. Because I had been three weeks of the longest. We'd been apart since we started dating.

But now you've been gone for four. I don't like it. I think we need to start. And during that time, I had one of my best friends of like over 20 years ago, who I haven't seen in 10 years. But, you know, it's like you don't need to see them all the time. You just pick back up. And it was like, she came and stayed with me for the whole week because I couldn't be without someone, not only because obviously taking care of Kaya. But, like, for myself.

No, I know. I can't. That's why I was like, I know. You don't have to tell me. I know. I'm just glad she could come in during that time period. So then it felt like, you know, you had some support. Kelly is my savior.

Yeah. Kelly was fantastic. Yeah. We've talked about her on here already. Like Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, even Bravo, bravo TV.com did a piece about like something like milestone with my new daughter. And it was like learning how to swaddle. And they were like, her friend, Kelly Boris, from Charleston, South Carolina. I was like, Kelly.

Oh, that's so funny. Well, because she taught you how to do it. Yeah. Properly, yeah. Which is just crazy. That is some knowledge that I cannot impart on you, unfortunately. No, that is. Nor could the nurses.

But I just, I don't know. Well, then I feel less bad. I don't like being alone, but I really like being alone. I'm really battling with this. You don't like being alone. You have, okay, Luke, you know what? Hold on, Kristen. Luke, how many times does Kristen lie to you about how she likes to be alone and she likes to travel and she's such an ease to travel with?

She's so easy, breezy, beautiful. I'm a great travel partner with Luke. Travel days, your anxiety spikes, but when we're there, it's good. Road trips? Yes, I'm talking about airports. I'm talking about planes. I'm an amazing fire. I get shit done so fast.

I organize the whole entire trip. I have itineraries. I get through the airport with ease. I get anxiety over stupid people at airports. Well, right, but there's stupid people at every airport. Stupid people in general piss me off. Typically a lot of people at airports and like half the people are stupid in this world. So there you go.

I bought Clear this past time I was in the, because I have TSA precheck. I've had it for years. And it used to be a lot better because the line was so, there was nobody in it. nobody ever got pre-checked. Now I feel like they've signed up all of America or everybody does it before they get on. So the TSA pre-check line is as long as the normal line. And so I was like, I don't know what to do right now. So I'm just going to get this thing. So I got clear plus pre-check just to like get away from other people. So I mean, I do understand. At Indies Airport, the pre-check line was longer than the regular line and they don't have clear.

But in the pre-check line, they had three security scanners going and only had one for the regular line. So it was moving less fast. The regular line moved a lot slower. Got it. Plus non-precheck peasants. But do you know why I think... I call it unwashed masses. Why I think pre-check is there's more people now because it's the same thing we're going to do is you can go to Staples.

It's so much easier. I've put it off this long because I don't want to drive to L.A.X to fly out of L. I don't want to drive to L-A-X to pick up my own mother. I've, in fact, called to her an Uber before, like halfway there and been like, I'm not doing this. So why would I want to drive to L-A-X and sit through a meeting to get pre-check? Yeah. I paid for clear. I got lucky in one airport.

It was like Tampa or something, and they had a pre-check station, and they had an opening. Like, I got so lucky when I first got pre-checked like six years ago. Whenever it, like, started, I got almost right away. not being a good traveler. I'm tired of this narrative. You and I have traveled together. I'm a blast. Now, okay, the times we travel, okay, I will give you some time. I don't know. I feel like maybe I'm your traveling. I feel like I'm your calming. Who have I been a bad traveler with other than Copenhagen? I was like Copenhagen. Other than just, you know, just several times. The notorious Denmark trip. Tell me one other time. Okay, you know what? Fine. I'm, I cannot log

factual statements at you so i will say you're you brittney loves to travel with me i'm a blast yeah i was i was good with kaya except part like one part of the time it's a lot of anxiety flying with a baby she has a lot of stuff so much so much stuff like and it's like if i have her luke then has everything else and i'm like no i can take like this or that and of course he's like you made the baby i carry the bags you know very sweet of you Oh, that's very, that's. And he always carries bags anyway, but then having, we, we like shoved all of my stuff, his stuff, and Kaya's stuff into one suitcase and then into one big suitcase, one checked

suitcase, all three of us for a five-day trip. No. And then we had a carry-on, but the carry-on was like half big things, but it was just anxiety about like, oh, God, is she going to, like, get sick? And then we're standing around and. Yeah. I feel like that's things that'll. I just need her to sleep.

Yeah, as time goes on, it'll make it easier. But again, so I'm a good traveler. I just wanted to clear this all off. Okay, fine. Thank you. See, you guys are like, Kristen's a bad traveler, but we can't give you any examples.

That's why she's a bad traveler. Well, just sometimes, but not with me. But I also feel like I'm a very specific person that, like, you, like, I am a security blanket for you. So, like, you don't get as anxious. And you're fun. Well, and also, you and I are carbon copies of each other. And like Luke and Benji are carbon copies of each other.

So they have very specific ways that they like to do things. And I feel like you and I have very specific ways. We like to do things, which is no plans and fly by the pants of our seat of our pants. Fly by the pants of our seat. And then Luke and Benji are like, excuse me, we have this laid out. We should do it this way. I'm not. We're kind of up.

Yeah. No, I'm more like, it's pick a line. Let's move. Luke's like, it's fine. It's whatever. Oh, okay. Okay, well, good. And I'm like, wait, which line, though? What if we pick the wrong line?

And he's like, just pick a line, Kristen. Just do it. I'm done picking lines. Yeah. I heard about it. Picking the wrong one last time. That's the problem is there is no winning. I guess sometimes you might win, but like if it's the wrong one, it's an immediate, like, going to be a fight.

It would be with me and Benji. But I'm a good traveler. And here's the thing about being alone. Let's wrap this up and about. Oh, yeah, the alone thing. That was actually where this really started. I've always said, I'm like a newborn baby. If I don't have attention and affection, I will die.

Now that I have a newborn baby of my own. That's not weird. I know this to be true. She absolutely needs attention and affection. So it is human nature to desire affection and connection. So I'm actually like the norm. I don't like to be cuddled in bed. Right, but you want somebody there, which I mean, I guess.

Yes. Yeah. I do not want Luke not in the bed with me at the time. I am shutting my eyes. This is actually true. Do I just have to think like a body pillow of you? I just feel like the alone thing. You don't like people.

You like every. And same with me. I always say my ambivalal cord isn't long enough. Like I, you know, I usually end up spending the night here because I don't even want to drive the 40 minutes over the hill. When Benji's out of town. When Benji's out of town, well, even if he isn't out of town, like, I would be like, oh, that 40 minutes to drive home. It's like 20 at midnight.

Well, at midnight, yeah, when I'm usually going home anyway. Or if my friend Kate can't get on the phone with me because we're each other's like phone support buddy at all times. So I do get it. And trust me, I'm, I never try to say that I'm not the absolute carbon copy of you in so many ways. So I get it. But we just don't like to be alone in general. I just think people are fun.

The problem I'm having with myself is that I don't like people sometimes now. It's like that anxiety talking where I'm like, I don't know what it is. I'm really, I want to get past it now that I have a baby because not that she's old enough to know, but I don't want her to be that way. Like I want her to have stranger danger, but like not like everyone danger. Right. You get overwhelmed by the energy around you. And when people swarm you, you get.

you just get, oh, no, in defense mode, which is totally understandable. Why? Because I'm an empath. Because I feel everything. Well, and I, you know, I'm the same way, but I'm also six foot four males. So nothing, like, intimidates me in that, like, energy space. Whereas, like, you're a woman. And I don't even mean this in, like, a sexist type way. It's just, it is like you feel like your space is more sacred because people can get in it. And it would be actually like negative. They could want to it negatively hurt you, affect you, whatever whereas like I've never had that fear so I don't have that same fight or flight mode

in like let's say huge crowds and you're someone who is recognized so people come up to you in a much more aggressive yeah like in a much more even though it's usually the nicest way possible it's still like you know it's a lot of energy to take on yeah it's their excitement exactly yeah but yeah um and ask me in 10 years if I'm still okay yeah exactly I'm like are you you okay. I'll probably be like, it is an energy thing. And you know what? Speaking of energy, I don't know if you guys caught that Taylor Swift was on the New Heights podcast. Oh my God, it took what? 10 minutes to get to Taylor Swift? You gave me so many ends and I was just waiting. But it is the most talked about quote, I think, from that podcast, but it's one that has resonated

with me that I posted, I think, three times already. And the two times that I listened to the two-hour podcast. But she said, you should think of your energy as if it's expensive, as if it's a luxury item. Not everyone can afford it. Not everyone has invested in you in order to be able to have the capital for you to care about this. And I think what I love about it is I do consider my energy expensive now. And I think what I'm afraid of when I'm in those situations like you were just talking about, as you were saying it, I was like, what do I really resonate with them what's grabbing me. I think I'm afraid of being a fucking asshole.

I think I'm afraid that I'm going to pop off or like be very blunt. Yeah. Because I think my issue, I don't know how to, I mean, I know how to be a people pleaser or I know how to be an asshole. I don't really like a bitch kind of. And I don't really know where that middle line is. That's actually very true for you. That's actually very true.

And I don't stray from that middle line very far. Yeah. Typically, typically, once in a while. You're a very middle line person. You ride in neutral, Luke. Typically, but I like to drive fast. Neutral, it doesn't make sense to me. No, but that actually is like you're having boundaries with people.

You're actually able to like give and take and also be like, okay, you're not getting all my energy. The problem actually is so funny. You know what you are? I know where you're coming. No, you don't. Oh, okay. What am I? Because it's also something that Taitay said on the podcast.

Yes. She referred to Travis as a human exclamation point. And when she said that, I literally thought of you. I was like, you know who's a fucking human exclamation point? Zach. Okay. You know what? That's so accurate. I too have a human exclamation point. I agree. I agree with that. All my introvert friends say like that I'm the only reason they'll come out sometimes or I'm the only reason. Like I'm there. Also, I'm their barrier to other people. Like they don't have to worry about interacting because I'll do it. Yes. Instead of like calling you out for being loud, I'm just going to say exclamation point from now on. You know what? I'll take that because it's not that I'm, I mean, I am loud. Descibly, like scientifically, I am loud.

I wake up babies. I used to not get invited over to people's houses because their parents were like, you want Zach to spend the night? We're not going to sleep tonight. And I'm not even joking. Like I have found out later on in life there was many a sleepover I did not get invited to. But besides that, I do, it's funny because I, like, I have the energy usually to give it to every single person. But I'm also finding that I need to have that because I can keep going. I never,

I am that explanation point, that energizer bunny, whatever, but I need to have that same energy for myself. And I'm not doing, and I haven't done that. I'm doing it for everybody else. I think it's because I've always been someone who puts others needs. in front of my own. And I always am like, oh, the cheerleader, the help, the help, the, the helpful friend, the assistant, because I'm so good at helping others realize their dreams. I'm so good at, you know, helping others people do their things. Yeah.

That then I forget about myself. So that's where I have been trying to be like, I'm going to give the same energy I give to other people, I need to give to myself. Yeah, because you're actually, you're really good at a lot of things. like you're a jack of all trades. What do you call? Gigiver. You're good at a lot of things.

So it's very easy when someone even just like whispers a little like, oh, man, I need help with. You're like, what do you need? I can do it faster, better, stronger. Or I've already done it. And here we go. Here's a tip. Here's this. And I like, and so like, you know, whereas like that might drain you, it fuels me because

I'm like, oh, I love helping people and I love or I love talking to people. Like people always are like, oh, my God, are in my entry? I was like, no. You can actually come up to me at any time. The people that are, like, afraid to come up to me, I, like, will give them, like, I'll be like, it's okay. It's okay. Like, yes, exactly. I'll be like, here, talk to me.

Like, I will not bite. I would not do reality TV if I didn't want to talk to people. And I want to give you my time because I like people. But again, not everybody's like that. But I just need to start being like, okay, I can do this for others, but I need to ride the line just like Luke with I need to have some boundaries. and give that same energy to myself. Yeah, you're definitely the social director of the crew, except you only want to hang out in West Hollywood.

Yeah, because that's where things are. Which is not the valley. Well, exactly. Well, I'm sorry, you know, the only bar I used to go to in the valley shut down, y'all. So I don't know what to do. See what I did there? I'm funny. Just kidding, y'all.

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And so I definitely, like, want to. But you mean from Gay Pride last year that I got you out for? An hour. I think it was like two or three. She had like two drinks. Yeah. You had like two or three. Before my thing was, and truly it wasn't an excuse, but I was like, my dogs.

No, no. I truly believe that, number one, I know you love your dogs, obviously. So much. So much they are your children. But I do believe subconsciously you got those. So you had an excuse to leave most places whenever you wanted to. And I will die. I will stand by that until I die.

And I don't care what you say. If we had a dog nanny, I would go out. If we had someone that came over and walked them and played with them and played fetch and all the good stuff, then I wouldn't be worried about it. But we don't have a dog nanny. But you don't even allow there to be a dog nanny. Well, we would have to vet them. I would prefer it to be a friend.

It's how I feel about getting kind of a babysitter. Like our pediatrician's office has like a list. Luke told me of like nannies and babysitters. And yesterday he's like, we really need to jump on this because she's old enough now or getting to be of an age where like I'm going to be comfortable. He's comfortable. We have to have some help. Like she's going to not be a new.

newborn in two weeks. Yeah, you guys have to be able to leave the house. Yeah, and like when he first mentioned that to me, I was like, oh, that's a, that's a great idea. Then we know they're reputable. And then when he said it again yesterday, I was like, oh, I'd really rather it be someone we know. That's how I feel about my dogs.

I need a friend. Well, there'll be times you'll have to step outside your comfort zone. Yeah, and isn't like 95% of the, like, murders or whatever happen from people you know? So I don't know if that's. And your friend's choice is to have. been questionable at times they have been questionable in the past ma'am there's a lot of snakes in i'm put it that way so i don't i think you just have to vet properly and have a lot of cameras in your house which you already have so but it's like okay so even if i i'm talking about me but zach

i'm really directing this at you because you're really good at going out you really really people you are and i don't mean that's a fun compliment i like it i take that it doesn't mean getting fucked up like you're not even drinking right now currently for however long you'd feel like it just because you Benji had like a good run of going out like you were in Toronto then you went home to Louisville then you were in San Francisco hence why I didn't see you for a whole month you were gone but like you're really good at it so how do I get good at wanting to do that again I know a lot of it for me has to do with like I need to like feel pretty again now I will say I even had issue shoes until I got on, because I tore my meniscus, which I don't know if any, like, everybody

knows that, but I tore my meniscus in my knee. It is still not repaired. And I've tried to do the rehab and the whatever. How did you do that, Zach? Well, number one, I was walking. That was not during the dance. And yes, I had a metal credit card in my hand. And when I slipped on the water on the, the side hallway of this bar, I fell on my knee like I was doing a death drop, but it just destroyed my knee and then I cut my hand open and had to get a tetanus shot from because I fell on a credit card. So yes, it was a very traumatic experience. Yes. But feeling that pretty, like I gained so much and that did affect like I didn't want to stay out as much or I didn't want to do this. And I think especially when you get to a certain point, you then, it spirals and it makes it worse and

it's harder to even get that one foot out the door and getting back to that point where you feel beautiful in your own skin and whatever. And it doesn't mean like, oh my God, I need to be model thin and I need to. No, no. It just means like you're doing things for yourself in the healthiest way possible and getting back to like you. Like when your body goes through so much change after childbirth, I can only imagine getting back to that what makes you feel good to then be out and possible.

public. And the thing is, when you go out in public, people recognize you and want to take a photo with you. And you're, then again, we go back to feeling bad to say no, but you're not feeling good about yourself. And it's like this internal struggle. Yeah, for sure. Like, I was, I was thinking about it today when you text and you were like, oh, I'm going to get a spray tan and then I'll come over. Zach's like M.O. It's literally I, I, when I give like a eulogy at your funeral, if I'm still alive and when you die, I'm going to talk about, I'm going to get a spray tan and then come over. And what I thought was, I can't get a spray tan anymore. So a fun fact about Zach, he's actually a vampire. He's allergic to the sun. I am. So he spray tans to look

tan. That is actually, I don't think people know that that you like run from the sun. No, that you run from the sun. Well, I run from the sun. That's why I stay so youthful. My youthful. Do you want to talk about some, a step that you took to feel better about yourself? Oh yeah. Like that, that's actually a great thing because had I not got on a GLP1, that has mentally changed the game. Is that the compound one? The compound one. So you can, there's a lot of different versions. I feel like here's the thing.

You got to find the one that's right for you because there's so many different. The original was Ozzympic. Ozympic was meant for specifically, you know, with diabetic patients to do a certain thing. And I'm not going to lie. I think I've said this before on the podcast, but like I tried Ozympic before I got pregnant with Kaya. and I threw up for three weeks straight. It was not my jam.

I don't lie about the shit that I try. I jumped on the train. Exactly. Well, and I was like, let me get a brand deal so I can be honest about it and get paid. Yeah, hell yeah. By the way, Lincoln, Bio and checkout Shed, they are amazing for their GLP ones and other assorted things as far as the beauty pharmaceuticals are concerned. But, yeah, basically, I got to.

And that changed the game because I don't have food noise anymore. And I'm able to work out, choose my meals, and be healthier version of myself. And I now have the confidence I had pre gaining all this weight because I can't work out as hard as I used to. So I just can, Zach. Let's be honest. I just found out this morning that I got. I got approved. I was trying to get on Wagovi because a friend of mine used it and she looks phenomenal.

feels great, had Dr. Checkins, all the stuff. I did not get approved for Waygo B. I got approved for a compound, a semi-glutide compound because of my, my BMI wasn't high enough. And you guys, trust me, I got some LBs to lose. LBs to lose. Losing baby weight is like, no joke. Yeah, I'm surprised, honestly, and no offense, but I'm like, I am a little surprised that you couldn't just choose one of them.

Yeah, I don't know. I had to, like, fill out all this information, and then this doctor got back to me and said that that's not well and here's the thing each one handles a different type of thing so i'm on trizepotide compounded and for me i have no side effects maybe slightly less of a sex drive which was out of nowhere it's because it takes away everybody's experience is different i don't want water like i don't like you never wanted water you only drink diet cook before I know, but now I barely want Diet Coke. Like, you know what I mean?

You're just not thirsty. So you have to like know that, okay, I need to pay attention to these things and regulate them and make sure that I'm like. Be very following. Yeah. Be just be conscious of them. But there are, it's been overall like such a positive. Like for your self confidence.

For my self confidence. Like it's one of the best things I could have done. because now I can maintain my weight because, you know, once you lose the weight, it's, okay, great, you're at a certain weight. Okay, now I just want to maintain the weight and then be able to build muscle or, you know, still eat healthy and keep my numbers, like my triglycerides and my blood sugar and all the other stuff, keep it down and keep it healthy so that, you know. So I got a question for you guys. What is the, if there's a recurring time, at what point in your day do you feel you judge yourself the most?

Like you. Oh, that's a good question. How you look. Well, it's probably right before I step out the door or like to do something. Yeah. But if I wake up in the morning and I don't feel like, if I don't feel pretty or I'm like, oh, I got to get a spray tan. I'm not, I'm canceling anything I have to do that day on like in front of social media or on camera or whatever, canceling it until I am spray tanned. It's when, I mean, postpartum, I'm pretty much in the same daytime pajamas and I'm taking care of.

baby with you, of course. And I don't look in the mirror that often because I don't have to right now. So it's been in the positive thing about not having to quote unquote, like, go back to work and having this time with Kaya has been that like I have so much time to spend with her in like the really important times. And also that I don't have that pressure necessarily. But also like I got to leave the house sometime. Like I have this event I'm supposed to be going to.

coming up and I'm already like, I think I got to cancel it. Yeah. The thought of getting dressed, like the thought of like putting actual clothes on when we just went to Indiana and I had to pack like outfits just to do things with this family who are like not going to be judging me for my weight or whatever it is. I mean, I just got Botox. So I definitely like my face feels prettier, which is lovely. I feel more like myself because guys, I'm a frozen face.

Okay. I'm not going to lie. That's my favorite thing. But just literally having to like. order clothes or put clothes on and then I'm also like stressed out because I'm like man I don't want to keep ordering clothes that are like so big and then they're not going to like I want to lose the baby weight I'm not trying to get down to my like 125 pounds when I was you know 24 years old when you were in the back of the soralley you're like I'm not going smoking a pack a day

sometimes more it's like most times more I was legit like the kate moss diet like diet coconut cigarette that like oh all day long and I love that I'm healthier now And I do look at videos and photos that fans of the show will, like, tag me in where I was really, really skinny. And I'm like, that doesn't look cute. Like, I looked unhealthy because I also smoked a lot and drank and all the stuff. So I'm like, I do look healthier now and that's great. But, like, I don't want to put clothes on. Yeah.

Because I'm not pregnant. And I kind of still look pregnant. And that's okay because I know that's part of the journey. But I also follow a lot of moms on social media. Luke, this goes back to like when you asked me a couple weeks ago on the podcast, like, is social media good for, good or bad for like parenting and whatever? And I'll say being a new mom, it's tough because a lot of the moms that I follow look pretty fucking great. Well, you think they look great because like they spend a lot of time photoshopping their photos.

And that's the thing about social media is especially with like the updated AI stuff. you can make your body look whatever way with a click of a button and just pointing to the area. You don't have to have Adobe Photoshop skills anymore. So that I feel like there's a net positive and a net negative at the same time. So it's like there's some stuff where it's like you shouldn't follow if it's just aesthetically because nobody wants that. I feel like nobody wants that perfect. Like, oh, we did this play date and it was like it's too much. It's like let's get to the real stuff.

like yeah i think the real stuff makes me happier too but just physically how i feel about myself it's luke just going back to your question like it's when i just have when i have to get ready which i'm sort of like i'm 50 50 right now like dreading and looking forward to the fall because i feel like the fall is going to be my summer like i forget that it's even summer because we don't we didn't do anything this summer if you will like we didn't spend the summer like in the pool and like going to parties and socializing and all of that stuff. But I feel like this fall has to be like my summer, which in L.A. It's nice anyway.

And it's your birthday. And it's Halloween. Like the fall is really fun. Well, and if there's one thing I'm good about doing, it's guilting you into doing things I want you to do. True. Only usually twice a year, though. And that's gay pride.

And I couldn't do that because Kaya was literally born on gay pride this year. So I was like, during Pride Months. So there was no way I was getting you out during it. But she came during June because she wanted to be an ally and I really appreciate that. But then the second time that I can guilt you into things is my birthday, which is in October. So great, I can guilt you into at least a couple things during October. And I want to, like, have a girl's night. And I want, like, Luke and I to go have a date night where I'm not freaking out.

And I want to have, like, another night where we all, or day, you know, or brunch or something where we all go out together. And it doesn't mean, it means something different now. It's not like how wasted can we get those two shots and like all the shit. But yeah, like let's have some cocktails and let's party and dance and hang out. Yeah, take a couple of shots and take a nap, you know. But I, yeah. So I'm 50-50 on it. Like let's say in the most perfect world, Kaya has the babysitter unlock that I love and I'm not worried about it.

The dogs are happy as can be. I'm still 50-50 on it. No, I know. That's why I said. How do I push myself? I like how you were like, oh, well, if I have a dog sitter, bull, bull. Because I've said, okay, well, I've got a dog sitter for you. And you're like, yeah, no.

I know. Just kind of circling back to social media. I was looking on, when I was on Instagram today, our good friend Josh Peck has podcasts called The Good Guys. And he and Ben were talking about, do you run? photos by your significant other before you post them on social media. And he was actually referring back to Taylor Swift on the New Heights podcast. But Josh is the one who said it and that's where I saw it. So I'm like, oh, that's interesting. I've never asked Zach how Benji, how you and Benji are about that. Benji's not like a big social media person. His social media is perfectly curated.

It's so fun to look at. Yeah, because he literally every photo, number one, he knows the stances. So he's got every, he's got the poses ready. Should Benji teach me poses? Benji should teach everyone poses. He's got the poses ready. He puts it in like portrait and at 0.5 and this and stand here and just take this photo. I take one photo. He doesn't need to edit it because he's like got the most like high cheekbones ever.

Like his he's got no wrinkles, no flaws. And his hair sits perfectly in every picture. So yeah, it's very easy for him to just like. Like, oh, yeah, whatever one, babe, it's fine. Yeah. And then I'm over here. Well, at first, he would like post something and then I wouldn't repost it. And he'd be like, why didn't you repost it?

And I go, you didn't ask me. And you also didn't edit that photo. Like, I need to look consistent. What are you doing? Like, I will even sometimes tell fans like, okay, this is the number on this app with this and at this. Thank you. If you want me to keep it on my page.

Yeah. Face app. It's just like, you know, it's just a little, nice little filter. Just a little glow. Does he normally ask you before he posts something or he just does it? Well, no, he learned. He learned very fast. Okay, if I ever want Zach to read.

Or sometimes I would yell at him and be like, that is what you aesthetically thought I look like. I was like, take that down now. So. All your girlfriends know. Like, we all know to go in a group chat. Go in a group chat. everybody each person edit their face then send it back to the chat or like I usually will edit a few people's faces and be like hey I think this looks great for everybody and just to you guys

know we're not like changing like our noses and our weight and all of that it's just like the lighting sucks yeah the lighting oh god we it may just never I have this horrible shadow it's blah blah and I just want to look like how I think I look when I look in the mirror right I just want to have it look like the Paris filter without the Paris filter. You know what about you? You guys don't have to ask me for approval. Post whatever you want. You know that about me.

Well, Kristen, you know before we even started dating, I asked you. And I'm like, anytime, if I'm with a group of girls or wherever, if I take a picture, I'm never going to post it without being like, who wants to, here, let me just send you everything. You guys do it and just post it when you're done. Yeah, Luke's really good about that. No, he's great about that. We're back. Kaya has a bottle in her mouth.

We're good to go for a few. So, Zach, when was the last time you changed the diaper or have you ever? I've changed, like, dog diapers a lot. Doesn't count. Okay. No, I actually, so back in the day, one of my best friends back home, she started popping out kids kind of early. So at 18, we had, like, she popped back to back.

So we had two kids that were, like, very young. And when I went to college, during the summer, I would basically be there babysitter. all summer long. So I definitely have changed a lot of diapers in my life and I am very good at it. Now, have I done it recently? No, there was a very large, no children gap in my life. And then the ones that I was talking about obviously grew up and didn't need diapers anymore. So I will say I might be a little rusty on my diaper skills.

but to say that, like, I don't, everybody thinks it's so funny to talk about. They're like, is it gross that this and blah? Can you handle? I'm like, excuse me, I am from the South. We like learn about, like, all of our friends have babies kind of early, or at least there's that one person that's having babies early. So you're like babysitting, knowing how to like take care of children. I can keep a child alive.

I just haven't had to do it in a while. Now, wait, I've got a question for you all. Well, I mean, obviously, you know, you trust me with Kaya, but, well, actually, I wouldn't want to be alone with Kaya. I was like, I wouldn't want to babysit, no. You got to ask the question before you answer it. Well, I just answered. I didn't even need to ask. Yeah, it'll be a while.

So you won't babysit if we ask you. No, well, for sure babysit. What I'm saying is right now, I don't think, if I had a, if I had a, if I had to, someone with me yes we do a trial run as then we'd both be here and you hang out and just take care of us take care of her with both of us here take care of christian take care of christin take care of the girls so i can go golfing and yeah now that no that i'm i'm great at and i'm actually fine with that if you okay zach as a babysitter for me and i will take care of kyle no that's what you were tried to do to your doula earlier. You were, you're like, you hired her to take care of your,

like, oh, yeah, get some mice real quick. And then you're changing her diaper. I'm like, let the doula help you. No, but yeah, it'll be that you are hired to take care of me to like keep me company. Yeah, but I'll hold the baby and I will feed Kaya and I will make the bottle. But see it in her face. She won't let me. See it? See it in her eye. I see the scrunching in the knows right there she's smiling uncomfortably because she's like sure i'll say that for this podcast and i decided that when i do start going out again i just sent it to luke that the next person including your six foot four ass that gets super hammered around me is getting swaddled like a baby oh no you sent that to our group you know you sent that to our group chat

remember i i want to read it luke no he he said it the other day i respond responded to it. Yeah, he said that... I mean, read it out loud on the podcast. If you are too drunk or violent in Japan, police will wrap you up like a burrito and carry you away. They swaddle you. And Luke said...

And I said, which group chat was that? I said, please wrap me up in a burrito when I'm hammered. Yeah. I just want to get hammered and be wrapped like a burrito while hammer. I think that would be... I want to try to swaddle one of you. Listen, I'll even... I won't even fight it.

I will let you swallow me. Well, let's just always travel to the bar with a big blanket. Done. I could probably get, I wonder if I could get, like, an adult-sized, like, muslin, like, swaddle. Well, and swaddle is, like, you got to have, it's got to be way longer than, so, like, me and Luke are massive giant. So it's, like, to swatel us, you need, like, triple the normal blanket. And I'm bringing duct tape for Zach. Not for your mouth.

Just to keep it closed. Have you ever? Have you ever? If you ever, well, yeah, we could put him in like her swaddling and it would work. That's Benji's chair beside you. I know. This is the one I feed him in. A little high chair.

Which, by the way, I love that everybody's like, who's that toddler in the, like, what child is following you in this? And I'm like, he is my age. We are the same age, guys. I can't help it that his collagen is still working and mine is failing at a very fast rate. I'm glad he isn't really self-conscious about his height. I have some friends that are really. I don't know, it weighs on them. Like, it's always in the back of their mind.

They feel like they need to be taller. You know, they might wear wedges to a professional event or something, you know. Yeah. Ever get self-conscious about being tall? Probably not, right? It's like a hot, good thing. I used to be really self-conscious about being tall. Well, that's because you're, you would need, you would want to date somebody because you're

abnormally, like. You're not abnormally tall. Well, no, no, no. I'm just saying, like, sorry. Little taller than average. Right, little taller. So then you're, you also don't like being. the center of attention ever.

Like, I was thinking about your wedding and I was having a panic attack for you in my head because the attention would be on you and I was thinking, how do we fake that this isn't her wedding and just get her to like, it's not about her and like, whatever,

and then just walk you down the aisle and then... A surprise wedding will not go over well. No, oh my God, that won't go over well either. But I'm just saying, like, distract everybody so that, like, you can have like the beautiful moment. You know what I mean?

Yeah, like we just all walked down the aisle together. Exactly, because you want to make it about everybody. You just need blinders like a horse in a race. So you can't see the people seated beside it. That is so true. We might have to implement that. That I could do. You're right, actually.

It's blocked off the peripheral vision. Yes. Yeah. So you can't see people because the second you start seeing, you know, people looking at me. Your sister and your mom crying and other people in the audience. Yeah, you'll just like, uh-huh. In the audience.

I love it. Well, because it is. You do have to start working on the wedding. Oh, boy. I know. I'm going to swaddle. I'm probably going to be more of a bride zilla than you are about your wife. I need that for you, for me, for you.

I need that for us. For you all. We're so much fun. We're so much fun. I will say Benji doesn't have that problem. Thank God. But also, like, being tall, that's like a desirable thing. So maybe when I was like way younger, I do like tend to people think like, oh, I don't think

you're as tall as you are because I constantly get down to people's level because I want to like be equal with them or like talk to them on their level. And then when I do stand up straight, people are like, oh shit, you're a little taller than I thought. I think because I grew so fast, like I was six foot in sixth grade. So it was like, I think I just like tried to maybe a little bit counter correct that. But then I was like a good posture though. I mean, I'd say I'm like, I lean my head down and forward is what I do. I don't I don't stand up that straight. You stand up straight and like lean down to people i i do this i do this sideways thing right and you want to know why because my mom caught me having bad posture and i was growing so fast she was she was scared i was

going to get scoliosis or be a humpback and so she told our pediatrician hey kind of scare him into thinking he could have because the thing i don't know why in grade school scoliosis was like the worst thing you could have really was back in the 90s but i don't remember anybody having it. Me neither. But they warned us. It was always a warning and sit up straight or you're going to get scoliosis and it'll affect you for life and you'll be a hunchback.

And I remember this being like so vivid in my soul that I had to stand. So she had our pediatrician and be like, well, Zach, like they do this like measurement or whatever and they're like, well, and then you bend over your front of your toes and then they like touch your spine or whatever. And they were like, oh, like you're kind of like a degree into scolios. So we're just letting you know, like, you need to. So my mom was basically like, yeah, just like kind of like scarmer, like light of fire. I swear from that moment on, I always.

Butterfly. Like you had a drill start. Shoulders. Yeah. I was like, there was a pull in the back of my. I was immediately sat up straight every time you were, you were not going to catch me getting scoliosis. And they act like it's a contagious disease or something. It's like you're going to catch this thing.

I think they should swap those checks because they check. everybody right for mental health checks yeah and where's that instead of why are we why are we especially middle school and high school for good posture when we're not doing like hey how do you feel instead of how is your spine possibly off one degree like we i think we got that mixed up i agree but hey things are changing so well could happen right now in the wrong way so hopefully let's get it let's get it back on track people okay who has bad posture moms that's And I want to spray tan. Take me into your wings.

Oh, also, let's circle back real quick before we wrap up. You said you can't get spray tans anymore. Is that because Kai throws up on you so much? Because she spits up on me. She gnaws on my shoulder. That's a lot of liquid. It's, yeah. Yeah.

Benji threatens, he's like, you're in your vulnerable state. Don't make me mad. And he's like, I will lick you. And I was like, you like me. This relationship is off. That's some power, though. That's when he has some serious power. He has so much.

And it's every third day he has power because I'm like, got to get my spray tan, so I look, you know, halfway like a decent human. So people can't tell your pamphard. Exactly. Like with his fingers, like flick water on you. Oh, no. There's been sometimes where he's like laughed too hard and like a little bit of spittle comes out of his mouth and like lands on me.

And I will freak out and he'll be like, oh, I'm so sorry. I'm like, what are you doing? I'm going to smother you in your slate. I'm going to buy him some little squirt gun. so he can just point it at you. I can tell you right now, that will be a friendship ending gift that you give to him.

For pranks. He has like a prank list going. He's like, I need to just cause some chaos. I went to an all-male Catholic high school. I have been pranked out of my mind my entire life. I don't appreciate them. I don't like to be uncomfortable.

And I don't actually have to justify myself anymore than that. They're harmless. I mean, everyone prefers to do the pranking than to get pranked, obviously. But I appreciate it. If they get me good, I'm like, son of a bitch, you guys got me good on that one. But I'm typically on the other side. I'm also so scared of rebuttals that that's why I don't do the creative things I think of.

I actively like tried not to do them because I'm so scared someone will come up with something better or more malicious than what I came up with. And I'm like, you know what? That's I'm done. Well, that's why, I mean, there should be a gentleman's understanding of what is a harmless prank and what is a harmful prank. Yeah, I don't trust any of you enough in that regard. I would need it in writing. You don't even trust me? I trust you.

Unfortunately, you are so truthful to, like, I do trust you. And Kristen, like, I trust the girls. Actually, I trust everybody, but Jesse. If I'm actually being Jesse and Vinji, I probably, those are the two I would need in writing. The rest of you, I would actually take a gentleman's agreement with. The other two, I need it notarized. Fair. All right.

this for us. Cheers to a good fall to come, guys. Fall is the new summer. Orange is the new black. Forties are the new 30s. Forties are the new 20s for me. 40s are the new 20s. So I'm a teenager.

Fall is the new summer. Oh, I mean, you're, you and, oh, actually, yeah, you're younger. I love when some of the blogs get my age wrong. Because I guess, like, they just don't know when I maybe look more youthful. And one of them said, like this, I think it was like Us Weekly, got my age wrong. And it was younger than you. And I was like, I think I saw that. I said you were 31.

And then you were like, ha, ha, ha. And I was like, oh, I'm sorry. I'm so, I'm so young. I'd say I may be the only. Well, when I shave the beard, it changes. But with my beard and having actually worked in the sun, some of my 20s, I look older than some of the guys that are 10 years older than me. Yeah.

But it's actually, I don't think it's actually your skin because your skin's not, like you're not, like you're not. Well, you don't have some damage. but it's because beard in LA unless it's like so small or qua like just whatever it just I think ages people just in general I think if I got a haircut and shaved my beard Kristen could walk right by me and not notice

I will say 100% I agree with that but also you with your little faux hawk whatever I really that haircut I really like it's a modern moment I know you keep saying that I don't want to say that word anyway the back the hair in the back hasn't been even trimmed in a couple months now it's getting long guys this has been a blast Zach Zachary binks I love you so much I miss you so much don't ever leave me for a month ever again I never plan on it

I don't know that was that was a one and done type thing I didn't like it your popularity Zach last question how many fancy football drafts do you have this week oh my god it's so many so many would you do fancy football yeah I would because I would yeah I mean I would do it because like I'm not like it's just like fishing or crawdadden or going camping I can do the shit out of it I just choose not to but I feel like I would actually be really good at fantasy football but I just don't usually want to but you know what if I put my if you guys want to include me in a draft which actually that does take up a very large and weird part of you're all's time away from me it's only like two hours no no no you've talked about it

You talk about football season. You talk about it. You go on. You do all these. That waits for the Super Bowl because he knows that that is the end. That is, the Super Bowl is my Super Bowl because I know that straight season's over. And it's about to be gay time. And that's what I wait for every single year.

Because none of you guys really care about baseball. It's very like, oh, maybe, maybe not, like, whatever. But like football, like that is you guys, like, that's your church. So a strategy you might use that I heard or I saw an app. post or story or whatever. This similar situation, a gay guy joining a bunch of straight men and women in a fantasy football league drafted his whole team based on how big their package looks on TV. And he won.

I do remember that. And he won. He did? I believe that was the end of it. Yeah. Because, I mean, it actually turned out to be some of the really good players. He chose some good players. Yeah.

Like, I also feel like I get a sense, not to, like, go all L.A. on people. But, like, I feel like I get a good read and sense on, like, a way of, you know, I'm like, You know what? I feel like that. I could maybe look at the stats a little, but sometimes blind luck works. So I'm totally down to do a blind luck one. Got it. All right. It's happening.

Okay. Yeah, we do have a fantasy direction like 15 minutes. Is it that soon? Yeah, it is. Oh, my God. We better wrap it up. You better get rid of the gay so you can go do your straight activities. Just kidding.

Yeah, we need you to watch Kaya. See, perfect. Perfect time. Oh, I don't know if I can hold her with my spray tan though. Yeah, we can't. Yeah. None of that. It's going to be an issue of babysitting.

It really is. You really will need an assistant every time. Yeah. So Zach is half a babysitter. Well, Benji's the other half. He'll hold her. Perfect. I'll set it.

I'm just trying to use ginger neutral terms, guys. Well, it's been a blast. Thanks for listening, everyone. Thank you, Zach, for coming over as you do a lot. Because I'm here every day anyway. It's great. Yeah. We'll have an extra bedroom for you in Nashville.

but we're okay guys we'll talk to you next week make sure to follow us on social media you can follow me on all platforms at christendody and follow luke on instagram at luke double underscore broderick be sure to click the subscribe button so you can stay up to date with new episodes thanks for listening see you next week Thank you.