Sex, Love, and What Else Matters - It All Happened – Last Night on VPR S11 E9

Episode Date: March 29, 2024

Episode 99. In this episode, Kristen and Luke are joined by Brooke Siffrinn and Aricia Skidmore-Williams, Hosts of Even the Rich Podcast, to recap Vanderpump Rules Season 11 Episode 9, “Kiss Kiss, Revenge Bang”. Sponsors: Get 15% off with the code DOUTE at Oneskin.co Follow us: @kristendoute @luke__broderick Email us: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Oh, hang on. He's at the computer with his card, and he's done it! Oh, clicky click, magic trick! The click heard around the room! You guys just about finished? Sorry, we got excited. Thanks for snagging those tickets. Make every purchase highlight worthy with the BMO Toronto FC Cashback Mastercard. What's up guys, welcome back to another episode of It All Happened, recapping Vanderpump rules. Season 11, episode nine, kiss kiss revenge bang.

Kiss kiss revenge bang. And we have two amazing guests with us today to help us get through this because Lord knows Luke and I need help. And today we have Brooke and Arisha from Even the Rich podcast. Ladies, welcome. Thank you so much for being here with us today.

Oh my god. Thanks for having us. I'm so excited. I'm so excited because as our listeners know, and as I was telling you guys before we started recording, sometimes Luke and I have a little bit of a difficult time recapping VPR. And I say it's because for me, I obviously have a very different lens being on a previous member of VPR, but also just my reality TV bias bullshit. So it can be difficult without inserting all of my opinions and Luke used to be unjaded. I'm still more unjaded than most around here. Yeah, you're probably, you're not there yet. You'll get there, I'm sure.

I hope not. This was kind of a Deuce piece like episode. At first it was a little slow for me and then it was like full back to like OG Vanderpump rules like who's banging who you know? It wasn't like the last 10 minutes it felt like. Yeah. There's a lot in that 10 minutes. Yeah. All thanks to Brock you know. I love a good shitster. Brock is my favorite cast member at Vanderpump hands down hands down.

Right now. It changes. Yes but. Today. I love Brock personally so I want to bring up how this connection Hands down. Hands down. Right now. It changes. Yes. But today. I love Brock personally. So I want to bring up how this connection all initiated, because Kristin laughed out loud when she read the email from Sarah. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

We take comedy very seriously. Sketch comedy, specifically. Sketch comedy, very specifically, yes. Wait, what am I missing here? So Arisha, OK, let me preface this by saying, Arisha is a new watcher of Vanderpump. So- Somewhat against my will, if I'm being honest, but-

Wait, how did it happen? Because Brooke bullied you in order to podcast about it? That's a big part of it. I mean, I would watch it when we lived together, because we used to live together. So I'd watch it when she was watching it. But then with Skandival, that because we have a daily show that talks about pop culture news,

and that was the biggest story for so long. So I had to learn about it. And then we did a live show about it. So I just, to keep my lights on, I had to know about this. And now my friend's on the show, so it's, I'm friends with Anne. So I had to like, so I'm watching it now for her. Oh my God, you're friends with Anne the angel, like ever of all time?

Yeah, yeah. I met Anne at Dancing with the Stars, Taylor Swift night, and she gave me a friendship bracelet and I love it and I still have it. I forgot that was her that gave it to us. Yeah, she was sitting right next to us. That's awesome. She is very sweet.

She's too sweet. Yeah. Like everyone on that, like just like the juxtaposition of like her with everyone else and how they're behaving. It's just like, you're so nice. I know. Her FaceTime with Ariana was so funny. Like her being like close up, like her, just her eye in the frame.

Yes. And she's like, please let me work for you. Please. She's like, I don't want to clean a house anymore. I'm going to be a housekeeper. That was such flashbacks to when I used to be an office manager for this startup, and I came back after the break and they had left all their Thanksgiving shit everywhere, like food and stuff, and I had to clean it up.

And it's just like, this is so fucked up. I didn't get to party with you guys and I have to clean up? Yeah, no way. Yeah. It felt so bad for Ann. It's really hard being Tom Sandoval's fucked up. I didn't get to party with you guys and I have to clean up. Yeah, no way. Yeah, it felt so bad for Ann. It's really hard being Tom Sandoval's house cleaner. I know, trust me. I can't imagine. Yeah, I used to be that too.

Yeah, for free. Oh yeah, yeah. You did it for free. Yeah. Yeah. Not even minimum wage. The backstory of the sketch comedy thing is in an old season of VPR,

somebody was doing a comedy show. I don't even remember who it was. It was me. Oh, it was you doing it. And it was my best friend, Rachel O'Brien, somebody was doing a comedy show. I don't even remember who it was. It was me. Oh, it was you doing it. It was my best friend, Rachel O'Brien, who's a stand-up comic. And I started doing sketch with her for a little bit. And Ariana was mad about it. And she was like, listen, I take sketch comedy very seriously, as if Kristen shouldn't be

doing sketch. Yeah. Wait, why? I don't even understand it. Because Ariana went, at this time, Ariana and I were not friends because she was dating Tom Sandoval, who I had dated for a long time. And she felt in that moment that she owned the rights to be the only person who acts or does comedy. So she was very angry at that beach party. Yeah'm glad Ariana and I got past that.

Me too. I can't believe you did. The line that was the hook in this email says, from Sarah, did I mention both of them take sketch comedy very seriously? Yes. So I was like, done. We do. And now podcasting we take very seriously. I've never taken anything more seriously than that. And I used to be an EMT. So that's it. Wow. That is saying a lot. Wow.

Yeah. Oh, Lord. This is going to be a good time, guys. All right. We ready to get going? Yeah. Okay. So yeah, I'm... The beginning of this episode is troublesome for me.

Luke, if you want to take this, because, you know, it's Ali and her boyfriend. Oh, I, I, Ali and her boyfriend. You know, ladies chime in, I don't have a lot to say. No, I don't think it really was much other than just like a little catch up. Yeah. You know, just like, Hey, this is what happened. What do you think of this? And then they skipped past.

They did skip like the teeth brushing and stuff this, this episode though. Yeah. Like they didn't do like the teeth brushing and stuff this episode though. Like they didn't do- They skipped what? Like the teeth brushing, you know, like the beginning of every episode, it's like, how do they start their day? Well, this one has a coffee, this one brushes their teeth, this one puts a face mask on.

Just in case we were wondering, like what do they do after they get a good night's sleep? So they jumped right in this time. So yeah, we have Allie and her boyfriend, the DJ. That was great. And then I feel like they're just trying to make Fetch happen, but here's Billy Lee and Tom Sandoval talking about the house and the lawyer email

and Sandoval's like, Ariana's not responding to my emails and we're just trying, I'm trying to buy her out of the house, which I'm still confused about to this minute because Luke and I- Yeah, what? Because she just bought a house. She did. Yeah. But Luke and I were discussing like this whole season of

Vanderpump Rules. I felt like we were getting this two sides of Tom Sandoval. One saying he was so broke he had like no money in the bank and then he's like I'm trying to buy her out. Well which one is it? Because that house is fucking expensive. Yeah I think we're all very confused about that. Yeah. Okay but the other side of that is same for Ariana. Like in this moment, cause like she's like, I don't have any money, I have no money. And then is it Sheena that's like,

she's got millions of dollars of deals. And it's like, obviously Ariana's gonna know more about her money situation. Of course. But it's one of those things where it's like, I need to see the printouts of everyone's finances so I know where everyone stands. Is that asking for too much?

That should be, yeah, that should be mandatory for all reality TV, just everyone's finances. So I know where everyone stands. Is that asking for too much? I don't think so. That should be mandatory for all reality TV. Just everybody's finances. Instead of showing us some brushing their teeth, show us them looking at their bank account. Show us them signing their lease with the rent amount. That's what they should wake up. Like writing physical checks to each other. Dated this. Here's the notes on it. This was for marches, like water billated this. Here's the notes on it. This was for, you know, March's like water bill or whatever. That would be nothing. Yeah, there's a lot of like money talk this season, for sure. There is, yeah. That makes sense though, I feel like just because after Scandal Ball,

things changed for a lot of people, you know? So they all got a lot more money. Exactly. They all got a lot more money. Exactly. That's the bottom line. That's how it changed. Yeah. I just feel bad for all of the girls that came before Ariana who never got brand deals. That's the saddest part about it. Anyway, Kristen.

Yeah, plus they have a new reality show called The Goat. Right. Yay. Thank you. I can't wait to watch that. Thank you. I'm so excited. We shot it like 50,000 years ago, aka a year ago. It was so long. I was like excited to see Daniel Tosh still like kick in.

Hysterical. Oh my gosh. Yeah, he's so funny. What's so funny about that, so I posted the trailer on my Instagram. Multiple people DM'd me asking if I was the host because what I'm wearing, they somehow didn't notice it was Daniel Tosh. But what I wore to premiere night, my like peach shirt and blue jacket is exactly what he's wearing in that. Oh, that's amazing. I didn't even realize until they pointed it out. I'm like, oh, I'm a ways away in my career

from hosting a competition show, but you know, maybe someday. Dreams do come true. Dreams do come true. You're gonna be in Us Weekly now. Who wore it better? Oh, that's good. Everyone's dream. Finally men against each other in their wardrobes, you know? I know it was so rare.

It's usually women, but every once in a while you'd get a man in the Us Weekly ones. Bring it on. Bring it on Us Weekly stars. They're just like us. Yeah. All right. So let's get to Anne and Ariana's FaceTime. This certainly seems like Anne does not

want to keep working for Tom. Nope. I can't imagine why. Right. And as we know now, Anne no longer does work for Tom. We know that. That already happened? In real life.

Oh, in real life. I thought you were saying in the. OK. But not on the show. IRL, Anne is free. So hashtag save Anne must have worked. But what are your thoughts on this? Because you're, yeah, I was like,

Arisha, you're friends with Anne. Well, yeah, she doesn't, she's like looking for work right now, so. Do I bring Anne as my assistant? Yeah. Do we all just share her? We'll treat her better. Anne, I will treat you right, girl, we all will.

I believe that, I think that would be a good pairing. I know. And Ariana's like, you can tell she's like, I kind of want to hire Anne, but is that just going to be fucking weird or like? I know. Yeah. I know Anne through improv, so she also takes sketch comedy seriously. And I feel like that's all you need. I totally fucking agree. Ariana and Anne would be a match made in heaven. Hashtag save Ann, Ann is freed.

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Over to the two dozen eggs. Sir, do you do this every time? Sorry, I've been a little excited ever since I got this BMO Toronto FC cash back master card. Oh, and the broccoli boots that are over the line. What a goal! So yeah, it's just the whole thing of how fucking weird it is. Like, is Tom downstairs? Is Tom upstairs? Where is Tom? And Anne's just trying to get ready for the Taylor Swift concert, you know? I know. She's like, look at my dress. She's just trying to have a day off.

And I was like, what is anyone going to be downstairs? Yeah, I can't. I'm sorry. Like, I find that just so juvenile. I get that you're upset. I just think it's so shitty to take somebody whose this isn't their job. An assistant's job shouldn't be to handle all of your eccentricities of, oh, we can't be in the same room together. You guys are both insisting on living in the same space.

I know there's a lot of drama with that, but don't put Anne in the middle of that. Just be adults. Oh, is she downstairs? Who cares? Go downstairs if you Like, go downstairs if you need to go downstairs. So when Scandival started, like, the day Ariana found out and I was at Ariana's house that weekend, she had one of her best friends, Meredith, kind of be the

the middle person, like the mediator. Like, Meredith will just do the texting and start figuring some things out. This was like right off the cuff. And from what I recall, Sandoval did not want to talk to Meredith. So I feel like my assumption here is, my educated guess, my hypothesis, if you will, would be that Tom decided that Anne had to be that person because God forbid it's someone in Ariana's camp. But anyway, poor Anne, I totally agree with you.

How's Anne supposed to move on with her life, you know? I know, I know. She can't even get dressed for a Taylor Swift concert without getting a chance. And those tickets are not cheap. Mm-mm. No. I mean, she'd have to work for Sandoval

for like three years to pay off one night. I was just getting something. I mean, I don't know because obviously we're just seeing the edited show, but he does at least seem nice to her. Is that accurate or? I mean, Arisha, you would know better. But I mean, he does seem nice to her.

It's like he's not an asshole to people, but it's just like he's not exactly appreciative or thankful the way that he should be. Also, I don't know if y'all saw this, I was tagged, or I was either tagged in something or sent something by this girl who, when Tom had the pool party, the sexy singles pool party, she was, I think her name is Becca,

she was on TikTok yesterday and she was the bartender at that party, they show her for like a second, and she said on her TikTok that like her parents called her and were like, my daughter's on TV or whatever, whatever. And it said, and I could be wrong about her name, but let's just call her Becca. And it said like Tom's friend.

And she went on TikTok to say, I am not Tom's friend. I was hired as a bartender. I also was never paid. Was this, oh. And that she also, he hired her to like co be like a co assistant or something. And she was also never paid for that. Well, she's not the one with the red hair. That's Jessica. That's Jessica. She's another friend of mine.

Arisha sent me a text about her and I was like, they made it look like she was helping and make drinks. Like I was like, I didn't get it. Okay, so Jessica, I'm sorry for calling you Becca. I couldn't remember, but I did watch her TikTok though. And she was like, yeah, she goes, and I helped clean up and I was this and I was hired help and he never paid her for any of that. As a former event bartender, both of us. Same.

I would be cracking skulls. Oh, 100%. Forced to stay on. I wouldn't leave. Like I would have never left the house without money in my hand. As a business owner, not to be like, oh, my clothing line, but my t-shirt line, James May, whenever we have a photo shoot, we have anything.

I'm like, do you want Venmo? Do you want check? Do you want cash? I'm paying you the second you are ready to walk out the store. I don't do this net 30 bullshit. You know what I'm saying? It's a bartending job. You give her cash in hand.

Look, she knows where he lives. So you can just knock on the door. That's what I would do. I'm a very forward person like that. Oh, you owe me money. Knock, knock, knock. Hey, about that check. Is it one of those things though, where it's like,

cause like how much of it is on Tom versus how much of it is on production? Like how does that work in terms of when there are events? There are blurred lines, I would say. What you does that work in terms of when there are events? There are blurred lines, I would say. What you're saying, financially? Like cool choice who? Yes, who needs a thing.

No, if Tom's having the party, that's on Tom. They don't give you money for things like that. No, they don't give you money. They occasionally pick up certain tabs, but they don't give money for that sort of party. Right, if you have to, if they're like, your call time is at this restaurant, let's say I'm like, oh, you know what I really want?

I need to talk to Lala, so that's something I would like to do. And they're like, OK, well then, do you guys want to go here? OK, so your call time is at this restaurant, and you guys can have whatever talk you want to have. Typically, they're going to pick up the bill for that, because they didn't say, I could just be at home. But that's fully on Sandoval.

He wanted to throw a party. He wanted the hired help. T-Sandy, pay Jessica. Yeah, pay Jessica. Let's keep it moving. Hashtag save Jessica. So Schwartz and LaLa do some virgin jello shots at this place.

I really am enjoying the dynamic of LaLa and Schwartz. I don't know why. Just for some reason, it's like, I don't know, this is a cute budding friendship that I hope lasts. And Schwartz does only, he only does benders in moderation, whether those are healthy benders or unhealthy benders. Yeah.

Sometimes he just wants juice shots and Arowan and creation. And sometimes he wants to get dirty on the Vegas strip. It's all the same. Sometimes he wants to snort cocaine off a hooker's ass. We've all been there. Life is about balance. Exactly. Yeah.

That's just such a classic Schwartz thing to say. I know. And like, why was this the moment to bring up the Sheena kiss thing, which I had no idea about? Yeah. You didn't? No. When they showed it in the previews

in the beginning of the season, Luke and I talked about it. And I'm like, mm-mm. There's something weird about this. So they're going to, when Schwartz, I think in the preview, Schwartz just said like, yeah, I kissed Sheena or made out with Sheena. And I'm like, there's gonna be some sort of context to this where he's gonna say,

Katie thought I kissed Sheena or something. No, in fact, we find out it is true. I think this is- Why bring it up? This has to be the best kept secret or longest kept secret in this group of all time. I made it a decade. You kidding me?

How'd that not come out sooner? That's a timeline of this. When did this happen? They said 2013. 2014. Because it's when he and Katie were dating. They weren't married yet, right? Correct, right.

And she said this was right after her and Shay got engaged. Yes. For a long time ago. Which I'm still murky on the details of this. Did he grab her and try to kiss her? Did they actually kiss? She made it sound like they didn't actually kiss. He just tried to kiss her. Yeah. So when Sheena ended up telling me about this when I did the after show with her, I don't know if that's aired yet because I haven't watched the after show recently, but Sheena explained to me that she and Ariana had made

out, which we see on the show on this episode, and that I guess Schwartz, I don't know, assumed that he could possibly partake in that. It looked like a good idea. So he then just kind of went up to Sheena and tried to kiss her, and she was like, what are you doing? This was not an invitation for you to join. But I'm just surprised Sheena kept it quiet this long. I know.

It's also insane to see two people kissing and be like, oh, should I join in? Are we all just kissing each other now? Right. It's just absurd. Going to a wedding and they're kissing at the front and then you're just gonna jump up and kiss them. Just because you see two people kissing

doesn't mean you can join them. Weddings would be more fun if that were the case. They're so boring. All right, everyone, let's start kissing. Come on, it's time for the group kiss. Yeah. Is that how far a wedding should be? I don't know.

I got to say, I do have a college experience where we were all drunk at the bar and people were making out with each other's girlfriends. Oh my. It was like make out party, but everyone went their separate ways, obviously, but everyone made out with everyone pretty much. No wonder you're on reality TV. I'm just saying. Sometimes, if the vibe's right, people are just kissing each other it happens.

What kind of drugs? I am not in the right spaces then. No this was I was like. And I'm very upset about it. I don't know if I went into the bar with a fake idea or if I was 21 but that's about the age range where I was. I think honestly Arisha if you just hang out at Sirmore I'm sure something will happen. Schwartz and Sandy's something's bound to happen.

Everyone's banging over there, yeah. For sure, as we find out later in the episode. Yeah, so that was just a weird, a whole weird exchange that Schwartz decides to divulge this information and let Lala know. And Lala's just like, what the fuck am I supposed to do with this? She knows exactly what to do with this? Like what?

She knows exactly what to do with it. Yeah, fair enough. Call Katie up. I'm wondering. Hey, let's get lunch. Yeah, well I'm wondering like, was Sheena upset that Lala didn't come to her first before she brought it up to Katie?

I mean but. Lala and Sheena are close, you know. Very close. And I thought it was interesting that Lala said, the reason I'm gonna go to Katie first is she doesn't wanna give Sheena time to come up with a story. And I was like, that's some shady fucking palm trees right there. I know. I would be so mad. If Aresha knew something and I was like, I'm like her best

friend, she's like, I want to give her time to get her story straight. I'd be like, bitch. Yeah. Why do you have friends? I know. That would be so fucked up. So fucked up. I can't even imagine. I'm like, who needs enemies when you have friends like these? I really wanted this scenario to be, because I'm like, who needs enemies when you have friends like these? I really wanted this scenario to be, because I'm still trying to understand why he told her. And like, I went on Reddit and people were like,

he like was planning a scene to like create drama or whatever. And I was like, I would love a world where she just doesn't, she's like, okay, and then she never says anything to anyone. So it's like, if he wants someone to find out about it, he's gonna have to say something. You're gonna have to tell him. Yeah. But no, that doesn't happen on real something. You're gonna have to tell him. Yeah. But no, that doesn't happen on real life television.

I would love that world too. Just what would happen, you know? Yeah. It's like, I'm not gonna be your little messenger. Mm-hmm. Yeah. You can spread this by yourself. That's not how these people roll.

I know, I know. You can't speak from experience at this point. So. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so then Lala and Katie. You wanna roll a Ziggy or? No, Lala, no, we're gonna go to Lala and Katie at Lala's first. Okay. And this is when, yeah, Katie brings over a fifth of tequila, Lala has her sober champagne

and she's just like, yo, I gotta drop a bomb on you. But then it was like, what did she say? Like it was a few years ago? Because you said that, you go, it was not a few years ago then it was like, what did she say? Like, it was a few years ago? Because you said that, you go, it was not a few years ago. A few years and a decade are two totally different things. I know. That confused me. That's why I was like, wait, when did this happen? Because a few years ago in insinuates it was when they were married. Married. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah.

More stirring the pot. Yeah, I don't, I just, I don't, I I don't I don't know guys. I just thought the shadiest part was like I need to talk to Katie so she doesn't have time to lie essentially. That was that was shady and I notoriously love Lala but I was like damn that's that's that's shady shit right? Yeah, for real. But then we have, yeah, Hotel Ziggy. Everyone plus Joe are there. And Kyle Chan. You love talking about Kyle Chan. It's like Luke's hero. He's my buddy, all right?

I know. He's always just kind of there, huh? Can I just say, so is it possible that she was trying to, because she had just had that fight with Katie, right? At the astrology reading. Oh, good point. Was she trying to like, because she was like- Elbe Bridge?

Yeah, which- Who cares? But honestly, it was just, it was so weird that she was like, I couldn't understand it cause I was like, isn't this supposed to be her best friend? So I was like, well, that's the only thing that made sense to me. And even then I would still, it's like, if you're not my best friend, I'll throw you under the bridge. I mean, last season, like Katie and Lala were pretty ride or die too though, you know?

So like to see them kind of butting heads this season is a lot. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, they're both... I mean, I care about Katie a lot. I'm not friends with Lala. I'm not... Katie and I will always be like sisters, but we just don't hang out often, even though she lives three doors down the hall.

I know, yeah, you guys are in the same... You guys live so close. We just can't get away from each other. Yeah. Which I'll also talk about that when it comes to the max thing later. But I think everyone's growing apart a little bit and growing up and like kind of finding,

like especially Katie, I feel like Katie's finding her footing with different front groups and isn't necessarily like as involved in real life in this group the same way she used to be like when you know when she was with Schwartz it was different so I feel like Katie's really finding her footing outside of the front group these days so who knows but yeah so then okay so who tells Ziggy everyone plus Joe Tom checking Ariana out was a little weird for me I mean yeah like she did look hot but yeah it's like he's like drooling he's like uh Mom checking Ariana out was a little weird for me. Oh, the dress comment? Yeah, like she did look hot, but yeah, he's like drooling.

He's like, I fucked that up. Yeah, that, this was, it was a very awkward night. Yeah, what are your thoughts, girls? Well, okay, what are you, how do you feel about Joe? Because I'm trying to figure this Joe thing out because it's so new. Yeah. I have a lot of... And you were friends with Joe, right? I was very, very good. I mean, literally, she was like my ride or die every day. Oh my God. Hanging out for... Wow. Close to a decade, like very long time. Okay. Did you guys have a falling out or you just grew apart? You can say, but basically Joe ghosted Kristin when she started hanging out with shorts.

Yeah. Really? Yeah. Like we were talking, hanging out and then all of a sudden I got, I just stopped hearing from her for a while and I was like texting her, DMing her. I'm like, what's going on with you? She always had some kind of weird excuse. Her storage unit got broken into

and then her house got broken into and she was really stressed about this. Then she was out of town and I'm like, what the fuck is going on with you? And this was last, when they were filming last summer, last season. And I get a call from Katie one day while she's filming at Tom Schwartz's apartment

and she's like, dude, I just went to the bathroom and there's like girl jewelry everywhere. And I just thought it was weird. Like did Tom already move someone in? Like he already has a sleepover girlfriend and he's like, no man, it's my friend Joe, you know, Joe. So Joe, that's when I found out Joe had was staying with him and I had literally not really talked to her since. That was before last summer. That was the fall of 22. Not this past summer, the summer before. Yeah, since. That was before last summer. That was the fall of 22. Not this past summer, the summer before. Yeah, 22. Season 10.

We're talking about. Yes. And that was kind of it. I feel like the editing of the show seems like they want us to feel bad for Jo. Yeah. It's working. I know.

But then everybody's stories are like, no, Jo's shady. Jo did this, Jo did that. So I'm like, I got to ask Kristin what the hell. She's like, what's the deal with Joe? I don't know. I feel confused too. If you would have asked me a year and a half ago, do I think Joe is shady, I would have been like, absolutely fucking not. She's chaotic. And I know that bothers a lot of people. It never bothered me in my friendship with her because I felt like I could handle that. I mean, I don't know, I guess she makes me look calm,

but we both are so super ADHD. And it's like, we just speak that same language. But her suddenly ghosting me after all these years of friendship, when every, no one other than Schwartz liked her, no one. And I do feel bad for her in some of these scenes because I know like she's not welcome at a lot of people's houses.

Even the guy that I dated before, Luke, when I lived with him, she was not allowed over there. She's not allowed at Jackson-Britney's. She's not allowed at certain people's restaurants. Everyone just has this major thing against her because of when she gets drunk or the way she acts sometimes and it's just like, ugh, not great. But watching this, especially when I saw her panic attack,

because I think something that people don't know about Jo is as extroverted and chaotic as she is, she does, even having people over her own house, she would like have anxiety attacks and just be like, I can't be, like she gets social anxiety. So I would imagine having, I've been in that position where you have all the girls on the show like standing around talking shit about you, doesn't feel good. So I did feel bad for her.

And that's very mean girls. I did not like that. Yeah. And we're talking about like her outfit. And it's just like, is this Regina George? It's one thing, like there are plenty of people I don't like. And it's like, I think it's so, it just, it speaks more on the person that's talking shit when what you're talking shit is like how they look or how they talk versus like their personality. And I'm just like, you girls are better than this. No, I totally fucking agree with you because I do not stand for bullying like that. What bothers me about Jo watching it as a viewer and her old friend is like seeing her

be like, James, when she like knows about my past with James and how much I despise him, that irritates me. How she's like BFFs with like Billy Lee and like just trying to be liked by whoever, regardless of like all the knowledge that she has about some of these people and their character. Yeah, yeah. So that stuff irritates me,

which makes me not a huge fan of her, but as far as bullying her about her hat or her sneakers or her voice or her this like it's just like Even I feel like enough is enough like just leave it alone like just don't if you don't have to like her You don't have to be friends with her, but don't be cruel Right exactly. It's got to be tough to come into that group in any way You know, she's not even really coming fully in, but just like being on the outskirts and feeling that like energy's gotta be so awkward and hard.

Just especially because Jo seems very like tomboyish and you know, and they're all in like skimpy dresses and like talking shit about her hat. It's like, oh man, that's gotta be so weird. I just. This is how I know I'd never make it on a reality show. Cause the second somebody tries to touch something on my head, I would fit the mask. Don't you fucking come, like, don't tell me what to wear. Well, and imagine, imagine a world where Joe, Joe wants to be accepted. Imagine a world

and then she starts like wearing these little skimpy dresses. I know she would never do because that's just not her vibe, but just imagine a world if she did that, they would then bully her for the same thing, I feel like. Of course. Like, oh, she's trying to be like us. Like, why is she wearing a dress? So love you girls, but not you. Of course I love you girls, but girls on the show, I love all of you dearly, but you guys

were being fucking assholes and it's not nice to make people feel better. I expected better from some of them for sure. I did too. I was kind of surprised, but. So, okay, is Joe, are they dating or are they just like fucking each other and just not admitting it? Yeah, so this is what even watching the show

and outside of the show, I've been sort of wondering and I feel, and I hang out with Schwartz often and we've had some like our own, you know, quiet moments together. We just traveled together. So we've talked a lot about this, and they're definitely not dating. Schwartz is dating someone else now who's lovely.

But during this whole summer and watching everything we're seeing on the show, as time went on, at first I thought Joe was just being totally delusional, but the more we're seeing, and Schwartz saying things like last episode where he was like, you know, I could see us getting married and shit like that.

And then still sleeping together once in a while, like, dude, you know what you're doing. Like, I don't think he's doing it intentionally. He's not like, let me fuck her over. I just want to bang her and then be her friend. But like, you know girls, like, you know how women are and you know how Joe is. So what do you expect? He's dragging her along.

She does seem to like him a lot. That's, you know. What happened with him and Katie Flood? Who's that? She was the one that was on Winter House with him. Oh, yeah. They had a thing for a little while. Yeah. That just kind of like disappeared and I never heard about it again. Same. I don't know. I mean, as the newest person to watch the show, so I'm coming in with like no backstory, other than what Brooke tells me. Shorts is the one that I would date of the group.

He's a sweetheart. I like him. I mean, he's kind of like, he's like a golden retriever. Like he's kind of like, you're seeing that. Willfully ignorant about her, but I think he's so cute. He's so funny. Yes, I agree.

I date him. I agree. Yeah, he is very sweet and cute, and it's like, you watch it and you're like, how can anybody dislike Schwartz? There were times in the past where he said some fucked up shit to KD, and like, you know, like, I can't stand the sound of your voice,

and like, just shit like that. It's like, dude, come on. Yeah, he definitely has like a go for the jugular when he is on. Yeah, he definitely has a go for the jugular when he is upset. He and I have gotten in a few fights before where I'm like, what the hell did you just say to me? Are you crazy? But I think Schwartz is just so nice all the time

and always wants to be Switzerland. And then when he pops off, he pops off. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I can appreciate that. But he is like a golden retriever. Luke immediately was like, mm-hmm, like he pops off. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I can appreciate that. But he is like a golden retriever. Luke immediately was like, mm-hmm, yep, pretty much. Oh yeah, definitely. Plus his heart.

Shorts is great. He's the same guys from day one. Only a couple of people that I've met, as you were saying, like how it feels to be Joe trying to fit in with this group, I kind of have experienced that, except I'm a guy and girls are just meaner than guys generally, I think it's true

Yeah, so unfortunately true. I was more just dismissed where Joe is being more bullied I say I guess until last summer than there was maybe borderline bullying, but That's why there's the movie mean girls and not mean boys. Hey, yeah, very good point be mean girls and not mean boys. Exactly. Hey. Yeah. Very good point. Yeah, so I don't know.

It's all just like this whole part is so chaotic too. Like Tom goes up to Ariana. Like what are you going to expect she's going to say? What was that about? And she's like, my lawyer. My lawyer. Like send it to Daryl. You know?

Send it to Daryl, yeah. I feel like was he just trying to have a moment on camera? That was so weird. He didn't have to do that. Well, he said, I get that neither of them want to keep living together. But he said, basically put the ball in her court, and her attorney hasn't.

Ariana has complained about her attorney not following through with some things. So there may be some realness to that, as far as having no response, no acknowled acknowledgement whatsoever of, hey, here's an option to settle this. It's been over a month. Can you tell your lawyer to take a look? That's all I'm going to say. I think he wanted to say it on camera so it would live on camera personally. Okay.

I'm not saying he was trying to have his moment on camera, but I think he was trying to make that statement live on camera. That was not a Tom Sandoval moment. You know Tom Sandoval moments. No, I know. I'm saying I don't think it was a Tom Sandoval trying to get airtime, but I think if he said that on camera to her, they're going to air it. If he says it in an interview bite, maybe they won't. Yeah, and it could be taken out of context also. Absolutely.

That makes sense. Yeah. Well, it's interesting because like I said, I'm new to this world and watching this season, I've texted Brooke and her parents trying to get into this exclusive club of pump watchers. And we're like, new phone, who dis? I know. They will not contact me. Stop contacting us.

But because I'm watching this and I'm like, God, I, Tom, people give Tom a break, like this poor guy, like I'm, and it's like, I know, and it's in the back of my head, I'm like editing, like they're creating a narrative they want you to buy into, but like even just watching the scene, I'm like, Ariana, like just communicate, like you don't, and it's just the way that they edit, the way that they cut, it's so easy to manipulate a viewer. So I have like, you know, Brooke and her parents in my head being like, okay, he's trash, he's trash. Remember he's trash, remember he's trash.

Well, I get how someone just coming into the season would feel that way. Like I totally get that. But listen, we've all been through a lot of trauma, Risha. I know. I know. Me, Kristen, all of us. Together. Together.

As a united front, we have been traumatized. It's true. That was so fucking awkward. But here's my thing with Ariana, where I have her back. Because yes, she's very angry. Yes, she's very dismissive. Yes, she's like, just get the fuck away from me. But we all have to remind ourselves,

it has literally been at this point five months since she found out and that's been my biggest beef with everybody is like even you'll hear like Lala or whoever say you know time time heals everything but it's like everyone just give her some time then she hasn't had any time if it had been two years or something like that but they were like okay jump right back into filming welcome to to reality TV. Exactly, yeah. Not our first rodeo.

It's a different environment for sure. If they weren't on a show, it probably would be a little easier to like take the time and the space. But it's just been interface the entire time, right? Not to mention the news, everything has been so interface, not giving her time to like chill out and disconnect. I mean, for all of them too, really.

But then something I did wanna bring up in regards to the Joe thing. So it was kind of back to like as we all look we are all in agreeance the bullying is bullshit and it's not kind and it's it's just like I don't know it's pointless like it's just mean. But when Sheena brings up the big bear thing that was something else that that did bother me. Like Joe I know you maybe you, maybe, okay, she doesn't have, I'm trying to see, like, kind of play devil's advocate. So she doesn't really owe these people anything because she wasn't, like, best friends with them, right?

But if you want to be in this group and you're trying to make friends, you were the other girl who knew that Raquel and Tom were together. And she did spend Thanksgiving with Ariana. I remember that very, very clearly. And so this whole time you're covering up for them, but you're like, Ariana, you're so awesome. And like, Katie, Bieber loves you the day that like she announced her divorce.

And so it's like, how do we trust you? What was that about? What's the Justin Bieber reference? Oh my God. Joe has this like wild obsession with Justin Bieber and Katie like really loves Justin Bieber. It was Jo's weird way of trying to be friends with Katie. Okay. I don't know. Like, look what we have in common. I thought she was calling herself Justin Bieber. And I was like, what is this weird?

I thought it was a nickname. Yeah, I was like, okay. I can see how it would be taken that way, yes. She does have a cutout of Justin Bieber in her bedroom though. But yeah, so anyway, I'm just like seeing, again, I think we're all seeing like all the sides to this. Like there are reasons why they don't want Girl Jo around,

but the bullying is bullshit. So then Katie, you know, Sheena keeps saying like, I don't drink drink, I don't drink drink. And Sheena's- You say that a lot. I know, and Sheena's obviously like a few sheets to the wind and then Katie's like, all right,

this is the opportunity is now presented itself. Yes, I feel like we don't see a lot of drunk conversations that much on the show anymore. Well everyone's sober curious. How can you? I know that's that's very true. Cue the water tasting. I know she's having a water tasting like come on. Production is like you guys are fucking killing us over here. I know she's having a water tasting, like, come on. Production is like, you guys are fucking killing us over here.

I know. Yeah. What do you guys think about that interaction with Katie and Sheena? Do you think Sheena is telling the whole truth, or do you think she's trying to skirt around it to make it not seem as bad? I don't know.

I was on eggshells watching that conversation, because I was like, what's going to happen here? But I don't know. I guess, because I will say, I don't see Sheena participating in that. So I do think maybe she's telling the truth. Cause if she had just gotten engaged to Shay, she was all in on that when it was first going down.

So I can't see her sugar coating it. I think she was telling the truth. She was planning her crop top wedding dress at that time. She was not thinking about Tom Schwartz. Oh, man, what a throwback. Big difference between thinking about it and like a stupid drunken make out. And I'm not saying that I think,

I don't think Sheena wanted it whatsoever. I do think Tom pulled her aside and just thought is the thing. She said, tried to kiss. All I'm saying is that like, a little white lie, like he landed one on her and it was like a two second thing or She's like, oh he tried and I didn't let it happen. Yeah. No, I agree with you It's possible that's the tried to kiss thing is usually yes

Yeah The image that I get when it's like he tried to kiss me is very different than him being like we made out Exactly. That's what I tried to kiss is like he comes forward, I turn my head, he gets my cheek. I'm like, whoa, dude. Me thinks it did happen, for sure. I believe she said it did. Yeah, it's possible it caught her off guard and the lips touched.

And then she was like, homie, no, no, no. Yeah. No offense, shorts, but no. I mean, he's hot and amazing and attractive and super cool and funny, but I always said when Katie and Tom were together, like, cause Katie's such a freak in bed, I would be like, I can picture Katie having sex, but I cannot picture Tom Schwartz having sex with anyone.

I just can't. Yeah, I don't think I can either. Why would you try? I'm just saying, when Katie's telling me about- Why wouldn't you try, Luke? Yeah, Luke. Picture it right now, try. Sorry, I'm pretty straight.

I got it, I got you. Yeah. Sorry. I'm pretty straight Yeah, it was just it was a lot so Schwartz Lala and James are doing this Joe talk where are they together? I don't even remember where they all showed up but saying of all comes walking in later Is that when he has a hat on? No, it's when he doesn't or that no, no, no, it's when he doesn't have a hat on and James makes a comment. He woke up on the sunny side of the bed. Yeah, there is some like restaurant where they blurred the server.

The server's face was blurred. I saw they blurred one of the servers, the other one wasn't blurred. I was like, this guy's like, I want nothing to do with this group. Exactly, he's like, wait, what show is this? No, no, no, I do not sign consent. No, thank you.

Blur the fuck out of my face. Totally. Yeah, do you have a voice the fuck out of my face. Totally. Yeah, do you have a voice modulator too? Can we do that? Yeah. Here's your fries. Yeah, and so then we hear about, well, we hear from Sandoval about Maya eating

Ariana's to-go food that was in her room. Air conditioning issues. And he's eating 500 laxatives at one point. How is that dog still alive? That's a 500, is that what she said? On the show, he's like, was it 50 or 500? He's like 500. I was like, that seems absurd.

Look, as a responsible dog owner, it is never on the dog. It is always on the people you learn how to work for. Nothing's on the dog. Exactly. Luke, your first response was, who has 500 laxatives? I was like, Tom Sandoval. That's what I'm saying, It's just some absurd scenario.

That's why I was so skinny when we dated. We took laxatives, diuretics. We ate laxatives. We did. It was just like a straight through fare from your mouth to your ass. It really was. I had to be skinnier than Tom Sandoval. He was like, here's some Adderall, and here's some laxatives, and here's some water pills And I was like, okay, I don't know any better. This sounds great. I'm not hungry at all.

Yum. I hate this for you. And wash it down with some Sursangria, why not? I'm gonna remember this the next time I watch another episode of Vanderpump and I'm like, oh, poor Tom. Yeah. I feel like, whoa, nope.

Yeah. So how weird was it though that Tom invites Lala to the breath work? Before even seeing the wildness of the breath work, it's like- I know. After seeing it. It's just weird to invite someone

that you're not like really close to, to something like that. We've done breath work together. Luke and I have done breath work together. It looked nothing like that. We did not have headphones on. We had no one screaming at us. At the very end when he held the pillow I was like, are you going

to suffocate him? I was like, is this part of it? Killing them? I was actually paid by Ariana to come do this. Night night. Yeah, that was a different level of breathwork. Even like to go back to Big Bear, or where were they? Lake Tahoe, sorry. When they had the meditation, it's like nothing against the meditation girl, but I've done a lot of meditation, breathwork, crystals, cleansing, all this shit. I've never had anyone make me sit back to back or face to face with someone I don't like and be like, imagine what it would be like if they were, you would never see them again.

Like imagine if they were dead essentially. I'm like, how is this healing in any way, shape or form? And so now- Yeah, that was wild. And Tom having headphones on and like screaming and the pillow and the headphones and the, it was like maybe he was preparing for, no, he was already done with special forces, right?

I don't remember, but I know he said this was, it was like an emotional orgasm. This is Tom's handball line. Is he like just refusing to go to, like, most people, you know, when they want to like truly get better, they go to therapy. Is he just very anti that? Cause like this stuff is just so like performative.

It feels like, where it's like, oh like, oh, I'm doing these meds. It's like, you know, it's I don't know. It's like people that do CrossFit, like you can just do it without telling us. Yes, it's true. It's allowed. Oh, my God. It is so like CrossFit people rolled the boulder up a hill and then carried it down. Just want everyone to know. When Jax was doing Reiki, Remember, like that whole stupid ass thing?

I still to this day jokingly am like going like this on my floor. Tapping, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap. She's like right here and then right here and right here and your chakras and tap, tap, tap, tap. Like I'm surprised Jax didn't dab a candle. It is very performative though, I agree. And I feel like in my experience with both someone like Sandoval and Jax, I don't feel like either of them would ever truly put in the work to be in therapy for

more than like one session, because they're just going to convince, try to convince the therapist that what they think is true or what they feel is right. They'll lie, they'll manipulate and if you're going to do that, what the fuck is the point in therapy? Exactly. Yeah. I mean, I used to have Tom Sandoval tell me when we dated, like, if we did therapy together, the therapist would just end up telling him he's right. So what's the point?

No. So that tells you everything I know about that. Yeah. So this whole thing, when Lala shows up, you know, during the screaming, we were saying the timing, the timing of that was by accident is all I'm gonna say. It wasn't like happens to show up. It was pretty funny.

She's standing outside the door and right when he's screaming, she's like, so do I go in now? And they're like, now go. There's my cue. Yeah. Yeah. Doors unlocked, just go. So funny, impeccable timing.

And I think she got that jacket actually from my camo closet in Colorado. Jacket was huge. I didn't even see her in the kitchen. Yeah, what jacket are you guys talking about? She was wearing a camo closet jacket. Like a big puffy. Big puffy. I didn't even see her in the kitchen. Yeah, what jacket are you guys talking about? She was wearing a camouflage jacket. Like a big puffy jacket. I'm joking because it's camo. I just saw legs and a head.

And very tall heels. No, Luke is really feeling into himself these days because camo and cargo apparently are in the fashion world. And he wears this hunting jacket all the time and like a camo hat and he was like look I told you babe and I'm like if you wear those fucking cargos outside of the ranch we're done because she doesn't want me to be stylish that's the whole thing she's like I can't have girls looking at you. To quote my favorite movie, super bad. Nobody's gotten a hand job in cargo shorts since NOM. Okay? That's a great quote though. Win-win is NOM? Yeah.

Oh my God. What was that? Yeah. Oh, I'm dead. Lala is just, you know, giving Tom the speech of we all reserve the right to evolve, but she is triggered by the parallels that make her think of Randall obviously.

And Tom's just like, well, I want to be positive. And I don't disagree with a lot of what they're saying. Like I too feel that at some point, Tom's, I would be a hypocrite if I didn't say like everyone does have that right to have a second chance, a third chance. I've been there, Lord knows. But again, bitches, time, time. Give people time. For fuck's sake. And then we'll do your breathwork weirdness. And we'll scream into pillows together. Scream into pillows. So now we have Katie and Ariana, they're at the sandwich shop,

something about her. People were just tearing them the fuck apart in those interview bites. I know. Why are we doing this again? We already did this. We already tasted your sandwiches. If it's me, I'm... Yes, I would love to come for some more free sandwiches. Same. It's free food.

I don't care that we did it already. Yeah. Do you never go to your favorite sandwich place twice? I already had it once a year ago. Don't eat it again. Call me. I'll eat all the caprices you will offer. I've had Pizza Hut four times in the last two weeks.

Like acting like we don't eat that, like, come on. And it's, they're good looking sandwiches. But like they also have the shop like decorated. It's all like, it wasn't like that before. Like I think they wanted people to come see the place done. Yeah. Eat the sandwiches in the setting that they'll be eaten in eventually.

I don't know. And I'm, I know for a fact, it's on Robertson. It's like literally in between Sir and Pump, where Pump was. Oh, okay. On the same side of the street. And I am aware that West Hollywood is a bitch when it comes to permits.

Because I remember when Sir didn't even have a liquor license yet, and they wanted to start doing a happy hour, they wanted to have a DJ when we expanded from like the tiny cafe into the big restaurant. And it was like hell on earth because it's a residential area too. And you just, I mean, you have to like, it takes forever. So I do get that the permits are a fucking issue,

but I do feel bad that they've been spending all this money and it's still not open. Right, that's what I'll say in defense of Ariana's finances is that holding down a lease in prime real estate in Los Angeles for a year. all this money and it's still not open. Right. That's what I'll say in defense of Ariana's finances is that holding down a lease in prime real estate in Los Angeles for a year in West Hollywood, yeah, without any kind of a dime coming back, that is very expensive.

Right, right. Yeah. Did you like the graphic at something about her when Lala's like, this is boring, fast forward, and they pulled up the- Oh, the editing of it. Yeah, yeah. The editing, that little graphic was fun, I thought.

No, that's fine. Wait, wait, wait. This part's funny. Their editing is hysterical. It's hilarious. I just felt bad for Katie and Arianna, because I'm like, everyone is taking a giant fucking shit on their business endeavor right now. And I'm like, y'all try to open a fucking restaurant.

Don't compare them to Schwartz and Sandys. Come on now. Right. Well, then it quickly spun to another slam on Joe, on sloppy Joe. I'm not going to lie. It was pretty funny. The sloppy Joe comment?'m not gonna lie, it was pretty funny. The sloppy Joe comment?

Just because. Wait, which one was this one? He was like, we all know Schwartz loves a sloppy Joe. Oh yeah. I mean, it's punny, it's funny. It's punny. Who doesn't love a good pun? And I was thinking of it more like, I don't know,

I'm picturing them like her giving like a sloppy BJ or something like that. Yeah. I mean, if you wanna be on this show and in this group, sometimes if you're going to dish it, you got to take it, you know what I mean? That's true. Stop putting these visuals in my head, Kristen.

Stop. Picturing. Now it shorts his dick in Joe's mouth. No, stop this. This is bad. Looks like, well, you guys just recap the damn show. Yeah. We're doing the best we can, OK, Luke?

Yeah, this is tame. So then Lala tells Ariana, you know, I was at your house and there's this breathwork situation. And they start talking about Maya had to go to the ER vet. And I'm just going to say, like, I would lose my shit if that were my dog, because now we're hearing it from Ariana's point of view. And I actually do remember when that happened. And she was like, yeah, I was at the dog ER all night long and it was bad. Probably the same one we've been to. Surgery, it is though, it's the one right up the street. Sure is. So yeah we're at

Sir and Katie and Ariana bring over their sandwiches and Lisa walks in and they're like here we brought you sandwiches on a little cake platter, cupcake platter type thing. Then it's like, LVP, we got to tell you, guess what? Schwartz made out with Sheena in Vegas like 10 years ago. Is there some type of obligation that they have to be at Sir at least once a season? No. I mean, meaning no on behalf of the cast, but I'm sure something in productions like, listen, it's Lisa's show. And you gotta tie it back.

This is how the show is started. It's not where it came from. You gotta keep trying to tie it back in, even though no one works there. And try they will. Yeah. I know. It was like a few episodes ago, I made fun of like, not made fun of Sheena, but Sheena goes to LVP's house

and Lisa's like, so you want, why did you wanna see me? Yes, Sheena drove all the way to Beverly park from where she used to live in Marina Del Ray in rush hour because she just really needed to talk to you about life. Phones just don't cut it anymore. No, they don't. FaceTime? No, not good enough. Like, no, this has to be in person. I have to sit through LA traffic. That's how important this conversation is.

And so, yeah, so this is a big LVP moment, you know? They're just like, did you know that Tom and Sheena made out? And she's like, what? She was like, I was there. It was that kissing party. Making out with them too. Yeah, she's like, we all kissed.

Schwartz would love it. That's really cool. My goodness, absolutely. Schwartz would be, Schwartz couldn't keep that secret for 10 years if he ever made out with Lisa. No, huge crush. He has a big, yeahartz couldn't keep that secret for 10 years if he ever made out with Lisa. No, huge crush. He is a big, yeah.

There'd be a billboard. He literally has like a photo of Lisa made out of like beads or something. Like this big giant portrait. Kind of like the Lego photo of Tom and Ariana. Schwartz has one similar of Lisa. I'm not even kidding. He's had it for a long time.

Crazy. Yeah, and then what did Katie say about Tom? I wrote down the quote. He's, it for a long time. Crazy. Yeah. And then what did Katie say about Tom? I wrote down the quote. He's, oh no, it's Schwartz talking about Katie, saying Katie's like Gordo when he gets a bone, like relentless, that Katie's just relentless. Oh yeah, because he just kind of got, I don't know, it was really uncomfortably walked up with Katie

and Oriana. And he's like, guys, I'll go out with some more, let's press some more teenies. He's like, ha ha ha. He's pulled them everywhere. He's like, this is I'll go out with some more, let's press some more teens. I wrote down some quotes that made me laugh really hard, but it was like, oh, that Schwartz went back to Brock. This was like why I loved Brock so much in this episode was this whole scene that Schwartz is like-

By the bar? Yes, by the bar. And Schwartz is like, dude, man, they were roasting me, but you know, I'm pretty roastable. He is self-aware at least. My heart. Makes my heart break a little.

I'm like, I mean, you are a roastable Schwartz, but it's so sweet that you know that about yourself. And Tom, you know, at that point admits that he does retaliate, which we kind of talked about when Tom gets that little mean bone in his body. And I think at this point, Brock's had enough. He's like, Katie needs to get off her fucking high horse. There's too many double standards. Guess what, bro?

Fuck someone in your friend group. And Schwartz is like, you can see him going through all the people in his head. He's like, the family tree. He's like, not Peter. Definitely wasn through all the people in his head. He's like the family tree. He's like, not Peter, definitely wasn't Sandoval. It's not Jack. It's like your best bro, man.

It's your best bro. Max, Max? He's like, I said it 10 times. Max, no way. The telltale sign of a revenge bang. The telltale sign of a revenge bang. Oh my goodness. This is actually, we were-

I don't think it was a revenge bang. If it was a revenge bang, they would have wanted him to know. Well, it didn't even have 24 hours to live before he found out. But this is one thing I do remember from last summer. We were pretty out of the loop on what was going on with Vanderpump Rules stuff with that cast,

but that chatter got around, that Katie and Max had hooked up. We all heard that. Because as we see, Sheena has 56 people's location, including mine. I have Sheena's as well. I'm not quite the collector she is, but I do have a good number.

But I do remember this because Sheena, when she checked Max's location, she for one second thought he might be at my apartment. And then she was like, no. Oh, that's right, because you guys live near each other. Right, because Sheena was like, there's no way he's at Katie's. Is he at Kristen's? No, he's at Katie's. Holy shit.

And still there in the morning. And still there in the morning. And still there in the morning. So yeah, I guess there was, we hear there's an after party and they were cozy and flirting. Yeah, an after party of two. I love two person after parties. That's kind of...

Shorts, you hear that? Arisha, what do you think about Max? I mean, you have a shorts crush. What do you think about Max? You probably don't really know much about Max. Was he in this episode? Did we actually see him? No, no.

So you didn't see him? And you have not seen before. So Max was on Vanderpump for like a minute. He had one season. Oh, okay. Was he the manager of TomTom? Yes. Okay.

I think they're making a big deal out of nothing. Like who cares who you sleep with? You guys have been apart for how long now? My only take on that is how big of a deal they made the Schwartz and Raquel make out kind of thing is like, Katie and Raquel were never close, never good friends. And for, I know personally that Schwartz and

Max are super tight. And for that to happen, it's just funny. Literally best friends. It's funny where the blame gets thrown because of course it's like, oh, we're going to blame Katie for this, not be like, dude, why'd you fuck my ex-wife? Right, of course. Yeah, I know. Yeah. But Schwartz is easy breezy like that. Do you think he's going to get mad at Max? No fucking way. No, of course not. Although he doesn't seem mad at Katie either. I was going to say, is he even mad at Katie? No, he's gonna get mad at Max? No fucking way. No, of course not. Although he doesn't seem mad at Katie either. I was gonna say, he's not even mad at Katie.

No, he's not. I honestly feel like had this happened when Tom and Katie were married, he would have been like, you know guys, I don't know, it's just the way the cookie crumbles, I guess. You know? Well, we've had discussion on cheating before,

Schwartz and I have. He's like, I have to use a condom if sex is sex. And I'm like- Oh my God. Not how I look at cheating. I don't wanna take that completely out of context. I mean, I do to use a condom if sex is sex. And I'm like, not how I look at cheating. I don't want to take that completely out of context. I mean, I do think he'd be hurt, but he's like. I don't know if he would be though.

I've known Tom for just a minute he moved here. And I don't think so. He's one of those people that does not believe in monogamy. He's just like, monogamy is just, cause there are people that are like, we're not made to be monogamous human beings. And he seems like one of those people that genuinely like lives and breathes by that, which is fine as long as you find somebody that agrees like is in that same

camp. But if you're, you know, in a committed relationship, then that's when it's obviously problematic. Swingers got to find another swinger, right? Yeah. Yeah, exactly. I could see like if this happened when they were married, Schwartz being in a confessional being like, yeah, Max is a great looking dude. Totally. Like, you know, like. I get it, you know, yeah. I get it, yeah, like. Yeah, Shorts would say that.

He's like, if I had a vagina, I would too, you know? Yeah, yeah. It's cool, it's cool, man. Like, we're all best friends, I don't know. Like, it's cool. What do you guys think of Sandoval showing up with T? With T, so I. That poor girl.

I thought T, for the last couple episodes, I thought she was maybe dating Billy Lee. Like at the pool party, that's how I read it, but now I feel like I was way off. I don't know, at the pool party when Billy was like, so Tom, like last episode, you know, she was like, so Tom, are there any like after hours, like any after party happening here?

Like it sounded so sexual and she's like, this is my girl T. and I was hearing it like, do you want a threesome or like, or the girls that are coming over, do they want to join? Are we gonna all have fun tonight? And I did not at all think this was like a T and Tom hookup. You read it that way. Yeah, I read it.

I saw it as like, she's bringing women to Tom. Like, this is my girl T. Here's this my friend. Do you want her? I'll find another friend. Here's her. Okay. Interesting.

Went right over my head then. Yeah. So Tom and T. I mean, Billie does have vibes like she'd like to bang Tom. So for sure. I mean, I know a lot of people in the group think that they have, but nothing has been confirmed. I feel like they must have at this point.

I think so too. But that's just alleged guys, alleged. That is my guess. Allegedly. It's when ratings are really plummeting. That's when it'll come out. 100 fucking percent. Production will go to TMZ and just get cracking on Scan of All 2.0. Be like, can you conduct an interview in front of a nail salon again? Because we've got some D, some N-C. Raquel, did you see that? Accidental, like a who knew this would happen interview. Raquel, so it's actually in the strip mall where my vape store is.

There's a little nail salon there on the corner of Magnolia and Laurel Canyon. And Raquel, like around the scan of all time, was just like casually sitting outside in the one chair that doesn't exist in the strip mall parking lot and TMZ like pops over. Is there normally a chair there? No, she brought it. It was a folding chair.

It was a camping chair. I'm just kidding. She's like, can I put my chair in the car now? Are you guys done with this expose? This one that was absolutely not planned. I had no idea you guys were going to be here. Just sitting out here to let my nails dry. Oh my God.

And then the most awkward for me, this whole, shockingly, this whole episode is Ariana is like, excuse me, kind of pushes tea out of the way. I just need to get a glass of water. So don't waste your time with a 41-year-old narcissist. Did you hear, like they're probably talking for less than three minutes. And she's like, did you know when my grandma died, he banged my friend and like cheated on me?

Like you're the prize, not him. And she's just sitting there nodding her head like, mm-hmm. Yeah, this poor girl. Hey, this whole group, everyone is a master of unsolicited advice. I can speak from experience on that too. You never ask for the advice you get from people around here in this circle.

Yes. Around here. Around these parts. I mean, there's no way. And then they all leave her at the bar. She just kind of looks like, right, where was Sandoval? Like his, just hanging out with Brock.

He was doing a do-si-do. He had, there was that like line dancing in the other room. Yes. He had his hat on. Yeah. I can't handle the usher moves. Like, please don't give us that bowling montage again. She was like, oh my God, you're so good at dancing like that.

I was like, that's going to get old real fast, girl. Trust me. Like hell. There's also no way she didn't already know everything about this story. Like you have to be in a coma to not know about it already. Especially if you're like going to his house for a pool party, like there's no way you don't know about this.

About his roommate that used to be his girlfriend about his roommate. For nine years. He tells the story quite often. And then God bless Brock. I mean, this felt like almost like a finale to me, like Brock walking up to the whole table and he's like, so.

Oh, he's had a few drinks. Like you can tell Brock's had a few drinks. He's feeling loose and he's ready to party. But with like no regard to just letting Sheena know, I mean, it was great fucking TV, but if you did that without even like consulting with me, I would punch your dick. Like I would just be like, I'd like smack it.

I'd be like, what are you doing? Will shock value. Just smack, not a bunch. Yeah, I'm not that mean. Yeah, downgraded to a smack, that's nice. A flick. Whatever, a flick. Like you shocked me, now I shock you.

And Sheena's just sitting there like, oh my God, this is really happening right now. And Katie's like, what do you mean? And it's pretty obvious. She's like, oh no. Yeah. Yeah, the look that Katie gave Sheena, like what are you mean? It's pretty obvious. Yeah. She's like, oh no. Yeah. Yeah. The look that Katie gave Sheena, like, what are you doing?

I wasn't going to bring it up. I mean, I'm glad at least Sheena's not bullshitting about anything anymore. This whole season, I feel like she goes, okay, yeah, I checked his location, then I checked it again. She doesn't care that she sounds a little nuts. She's like, I'm just going to tell you the truth. Checked his location, saw it again, checked it again in the morning and Brock looked at my phone. I'm sorry. Do you think part of Brock telling everybody had anything to do with the fact that Sheena

really liked Max at one point and now Brock is like, why is she checking Max's location? I don't know. I didn't know she liked him. They had like a thing. They had a thing. Back in the day. Max's had a thing with more girls on Banner Pump, I think, than anybody else. Really? Yeah. Dana. He dated Dana. He kind of dated Sheena at the same time. Yes. Did they know that they were dating the same person at the same time? They found out. Eventually they talked about it, yeah. Eventually. Yeah. I have one person's location only

because my friend shared it with me and I don't know how to get rid of it. But I think it, listening to this, I was like, ooh, this could be fun drama to know where my friends are and what they're up to. So I'm like, I shouldn't do this. Cause I would be like Sheena, I'd be like, it's 415, why are you at this person's house?

You'd have a cork board with strings. Yeah. Where everyone is location is too much fun. It would be so fun. I mean, it's not not fun. I'll tell you that. I love having my friends locations, even if they don't live in California.

I got to say, Kristen is the first person to ever have my location. I do have Luke's location. She's like, just for safety. I want to give you mine. You should share yours with me. Most of my girlfriends that I have their locations, it has been for safety.

Like they're going on a date. And then we just share it anyway, cause it's like, who cares? But yeah, so Brock and Sheena kind of, they get in a little tiff, a little alcohol infused tiff, and that's where they leave us. So next week we have the beach party fight that we've been watching in commercials. And the water tasting. And the water tasting. How many more episodes do we have the beach party fight that we've been watching in commercials.

And the water tasting. And the water tasting. How many more episodes do we have? This was, which one? I believe there's 16 total. There's 16 total. And that was nine, so we have seven more. And then reunion.

So we're just past the halfway. Yeah, because the Valley aired on their halfway. Okay, that makes sense. And they just shot the reunion like a week and a half ago. And everyone hates each other again. I heard at the reunion, well, Katie said this on Watch What Happens Live as well, that no one screamed really. Oh, wow.

And I know everyone hates that. Because they fought. That I'm not like super anti Tom Sandoval. We aren't best buds or anything. But he told me when I ran into him at a bar, I don't go seeking out. Or when you were at his But he told me when I ran into him at a bar, I don't go see him out. Or when you were at his house last week? When I ran into him at the bar.

Uh-oh. Anyway. Were you guys upstairs or downstairs? Downstairs. Ariana's in New York, that's why. Anyway. Oh, that's right. No, he said it went well.

That's all I know. It went really well. The reunion? Yeah. I wonder what that means. I, yeah. Sounds like boring television. I think because it popped off for some other peeps.

So I think the heat got taken off. That's Christian's answer. Yeah, that's what I was gonna say. I'm not gonna say who, but I know two people got in a fight cause I heard one side of it and a friend of mine, Brittany heard the other side of it. And I was like, wait, what?

Okay. So we'll see how that reunion goes. And the rest of the season, I'm like, what the hell are we gonna, no offense to them, but like, what that reunion goes. And the rest of the season, I'm like, what the hell are we gonna, no offense to them, but like, what are we gonna watch for the rest of the season after the beach fight? That's what I think, I'm wondering, like, what's left?

The beach fight and the water tasting, like, what's to come? We're gonna drag that out seven episodes long. I know. Yeah. And I think the hard, Luke, I've said this a lot, and Luke and I have said this on our podcast, I think the hard thing for me, and I don't know if you guys follow, like,

well, you've obviously followed the news, but like Tom Sandoval being on like Nick Biles podcast, the New York Post thing, that stuff's so recent. So it's hard to be like, he changed, he had an epiphany when this was just happening, you know, in the last month or two. So I'm not sure. I mean, we do run into him. It feels like he goes back and forth between trying to apologize to people and maybe take accountability. And then when they kind of push back on it, he gets pissed again and he's like, what? You know, he's teetering between. I think he ultimately just wants it to go away,

but can't bring it all together to say the right things to make it go away. Because when you get defensive, the I'm sorry, buts don't land. So he definitely wants it to make it go away. Because it gets, when you get defensive, the I'm sorry, buts don't land, you know? So, that's just, he definitely wants it to go away though. Oh, for sure. It's one of those things where like whenever he like gets into it with people and he's like,

his like go-to is like calling them out for doing similar things, which I don't, I agree. Like they've, everyone on this show has done fucked up shit. But it's also just like, this is not the time for that. You need to make a call for this and not make it about, oh, well, you guys are as bad as me. Because it's like, that's not how you apologize. Trust me, I try to apologize like that all the time.

It's Jack Taylor deflection. We're like, nope. Tom's saying, I apologize, Taylor, but deflection of like, yeah, of course, I'm sorry. But look, we all fucked up. You fucked up. Everyone fucked up. So who cares if I fucked up? Okay, well, here we go again. Now we're going to start right at the very beginning and stay on this fucking Ferris wheel of chaos. And I think people would come around to him if he would just let it ride, like just chill.

I think most people also know it's tough to stay on track when you're being triggered constantly as well. You go into defensive mode, someone over here goes into defensive mode quite frequently. When it starts coming off unfairly, when it's like, I've apologized, I've done this, I've done that, and it just keeps beating it down your throat, you start to get defensive naturally. And I think that's what's consistently happening.

All of his conversations are like that, where it's like, and it's like, I get it. I don't, I mean, I don't know that they're, what the answer is, cause it's just, you have, you know, you have your pride, you have your whatever, but it's gotta be exhausting to constantly, it's like, okay, we've all moved on-ish, or we're trying to, how do we do that

and still have relationships with each other? Right. I don't know. I'm glad the season has taken that turn, cause I'll be honest, the first few episodes, maybe first six episodes about these conversations were on repeat. I'm like, OK. But this conversation, don't have anything

to say about that same one. It's like, come on. Yeah, we need to turn over a new leaf. Yes. Give us something else. Bring on the water tasting. I can't wait. And now we get a water tasting.

Here's something new. Finally. I will be drinking vodka while we watch a water tasting. Here's something new. Finally. I will be drinking vodka while we watch said water tasting. So can I put scotch in the water? Sober curious, babe. You gotta be sober curious. I'm sober curious. You guys, I love you so much.

Thank you for doing this with us. You guys are fucking hysterical. Absolutely fucking hysterical. Everyone, if you don't already, make sure you listen to Even the Rich, make sure you subscribe, rate it 50 million stars as I tell my Uber drivers, as many stars as you can, and comment because it is important for all of us

who have podcasts to show the love. Tell them where to find you on social. I'm at, my full name, at Aresha Skidmore Williams on all socials. And I'm at Brooke Ziffrin. at my full name at Arisha Skidmore Williams on all socials. Yep. And I'm at Brooke Siffrin. So follow, send all the love, double tap the hearts, share the content.

And you guys are absolutely fucking hysterical. And thank you for doing this with us because it made it so much more enjoyable for me. Oh my God. Thank you for having us. Yeah, yeah, truly so fun. Yeah. I agree. All right guys, well, we self-bought. Yeah, okay. I agree. All right guys, well we will talk to you soon. Catch up with us later. Bye. Thanks for listening.

Make sure to follow us on social media. You can follow me on all platforms at Kristen Doty and follow Luke on Instagram at Luke double underscore Broderick. Be sure to click the subscribe button so you can stay up to date with new episodes every single Wednesday. Thanks for listening. See you next week.