Sex, Love, and What Else Matters - It’s a Girl!

Episode Date: December 13, 2024

*Note: This episode was recorded on Wednesday, 12/11/24* Episode 140.This week, Kristen and Luke share all the details from their gender reveal (what they thought they were having and why) to Luke’s premonition about the baby girl, they cover it all. Kristen explains why they wore hoodies leaving the reveal party and how she’s feeling less “crazy” now that she’s out of her first trimester. They dive into the role of a doula, Kristen’s emotional spending habits (and the intervention she gave herself), and a pregnancy scare that sent her to the hospital. Tune in for laughs, surprises, and real talk about their journey so far!    Sponsors: Listeners can get Rosetta Stone’s LIFETIME Membership for 50% off! Visit rosettastone.com/doute  Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/kristen Follow us: @kristendoute @luke__broderick Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello, glorious human. My name is Allison and I want to invite you to the party, the good times, the fun that is my podcast, Awesome with Allison. Every week I share tools, tips and real talk to help you live a life that feels as good as it looks. And trust me, if I can do it, you can too. What's up, babes? Welcome back to another episode of Balancing Act. Luke's back because we're going to talk about a baby girl. Whoop, whoop. We're having a baby and we're having a girl. Yes, we are. What a cute little gender reveal Brittany helped put on with Zach. I'm glad we did one. I wasn't going to do one. I'm not saying I wasn't because it's both of our choices collectively.

But I don't know why I was sour about it. I was like, I don't need one. I don't need the I was sour about it. I was like, I don't need one. I don't need like the party with like all the people and I don't need the games. Like I'm just too old for that. I was being kind of a sour puss about it, but I truly just like, it was a lot of attention and I get overwhelmed.

Right, well, she may not admit this, but I pushed her into this. I said, we want this memory. Yeah, Nia told me the same thing. Nia, I'll say, not that you didn't convince me. Okay, of course. Someone else always has to say what I say for them to actually register with Kristin.

But I would do it for you no matter what. That's why we did it, because you said you really wanted it. That was the whole reason, because I said, do you want to just find out and do it at home together? And you said, no, I'd really like this to be revealed to us at least. Yeah, at least have a third party. Even it was just three of us, right?

So that's why we did it. It's not because of Nia, but I was just saying that Nia also, because she's not someone who pushes anything. She doesn't push beliefs or push anything on me. But she sent me this really long voice memo one day when I was having like a really bad prego day, where I was just like down in the dumps

and I was really moody and I was like sad and just feeling depressed and all these feelings. And I was really overwhelmed, I think mostly overwhelmed. And she left me this really long voice note saying that she's not telling me I should think like she thinks or anything like that. But she was like, I just want you to consider that you might miss out on this memory. This is your first baby.

You might actually look back and think, man, I really wish I had done that. So she was like, just think about it. But it's like, I was doing it anyway because of you. But at first I was like, we don't need to have anyone watch. No, I mean, I agree. I did agree with you, right? I said we don't need a big party or anything, but at least have somebody else hear from the doctor first,

so we get to experience it together. We find out at the same time. That was the whole thing. It was fun. Yeah, definitely worth it. Yeah, I'm shocked. Yeah, one of the things we did, there are all kinds of wives' tales that, you know, try to predict boy or girl. Yeah. And...

I'm sure there's more than even the ones we know about. Oh, I'm certain of it. But anyway, we go down the chart and it predicted a boy. 11 to six was like, we did 17 different things. It's basically like pregnancy symptoms. I'm sure a lot of you guys know this, but it's like morning sickness, cravings, my belly shape, my facial complexion, I'm sure a lot of you guys know this, but it's like morning sickness, cravings,

my belly shape, my facial complexion, I'll just read them off, my mood. So it's like, are you moody or relaxed? That was easy. Girls make you moody apparently. Ding, ding, ding. I should have known just from that one. Like which side do I sleep on?

Headaches, baby heart rate, how am I carrying? Which I feel like is really difficult to kind of figure out that early anyway. It's too early, right, yeah, I agree. But back in the day before blood tests how am I carrying, which I feel like is really difficult to kind of figure out that early anyway. But back in the day before blood tests and early recognition of gender, it was like you had to wait until you were really far along to be able to find out.

A lot of people didn't know until it came out. A lot of people chose to do that as well. A lot of people still do. A lot of people or some people? I think people do it and I think they're fucking crazy. Some people do. I hate surprises. I don't want to be surprised at the end.

How could I go 40 weeks making a nursery, shopping for clothes, getting ready to be like, what's the name, boy or girl? And just being like, I'll just find out. Our friend Blake just did that. That's right. She and her husband Will decided not to find out until she gave birth.

And I think she's bat shit crazy. But I respect her, but hell no. No, no, no. I am too much of a control freak for that. That's some serious patience. I mean, you've already been buying plenty of stuff, but it's all been fairly unisex. Yeah, because that's how I like to dress the baby anyway.

Like I'm not a big ruffles and fluffles kind of gal. Of course. Of course. Yeah. But anyway, back to the wives' tales, things really quick, just you guys are right. So it's like, there's two things about my skin, which is just wild, but then it's like cold feet, heartburn, Chinese calendar,

which I had no idea what the hell that was. Had to Google it. Yeah, I'd have to Google that as well. And there's like a Mayan calendar one, and once a boy, once a girl. Daddy's weight. There was a ring test where you like hold a string, ring on a string over my belly. And like if it's swayed. I don't think we even did that right. I want to do, I want to do it to you. Do it. Yeah, but I'm not going to tell you which one's which. And we'll see what works.

And then like our guesses. So that was the part I will tell you what surprised me the most. That I changed. Of the whole day is that when it came to mine and Luke's guesses, I said, of course I have to over explain everything. So I'm like, well, at first I thought it was a girl because Luke thought it was a girl, but I really had no feeling. Then I had a dream that it was a boy, very vivid dream. And Brittany also had a dream that it was,

she had a dream that my doctor called her and said, Brittany, it's a boy. And she told me that before she knew the gender. So I was like, I mean, they say it's like mother's intuition. But then I also thought I'm always wrong. So I bet it is a girl. But either way, my guess was a boy. And then I go, Luke's guess is a girl.

And he goes, boy. Well, okay. And I gotta explain. I don't know, for whatever reason, when I was talking about it, leading up to it with my friends, I would say he or him referring to our future baby and they'd be like, oh, you already know?

I'm like, oh no, I don't. That was weird, why'd I do that? And I think, certainly I overthought it because I've had dreams, I've had some things that I felt supernatural vision seeing a girl as our first child. And I was very set on that until like the week leading up to it. Well, really, if you guys listen back a few weeks, we did an interview with a friend of

ours, Jonathan Chia. He owns this place, a founder of this place called the Reality Center. So if you go back and listen to that, you find out what the Reality Center is. When Luke and I went to the Reality Center with Danny and Nia, that's when Luke sort of had this moment that he's like, hey, we're having a girl, by the way. This is before we're even pregnant. And ever since then, it's stuck with you. Yeah, it has.

And I can still vividly see what I saw. I mean, like, I was on a beach with, like, a baby boy in my hand and a daughter, like, holding my hand beside me. So it was girl first, boy second. Yeah, an older girl and a baby boy a few years apart. Oh God, I hope that's true. That beach is perfect. So far so good.

We can check one off the box. One box off. One for one. Woof, woof. Anyway, that really did surprise me the most is that you switched last minute. I was like, I'm sorry, what? So then I was fully convinced it was a boy. And then we had a bunch of friends and family on Zoom

because we just had a handful of friends at maybe, I don't know how many people were at Britney's, like 10 people, more than I even thought. Yeah, about that. But friends and family on Zoom. And my brother kind of took a tally and the consensus was it was a boy. So we were like, okay.

And then the pink balloons fall. And I'm like, what? My reaction, I hate my reactions. It's like when people get to watch the show and they see my reaction to the engagement, I don't do the thing that you see in the movies. Like, oh my God. And like jump up and down and like jump on top of you and just freak out

with like glorious happiness. I'm like, huh? Well, it's both of our firsts and we said we didn't really like, either of us wanted one more than the other. No. So there wasn't like this hope in there. And then it was like, yes, realized it was, what's it gonna be?

What's it gonna be is all it was versus, hope it's a boy, hope it's a boy. That wasn't the case. Not at all. Yeah. Yeah. Once you're pregnant, especially geriatric, geriatrically pregnant, high risk pregnant, old AF pregnant, you're just like, I want a healthy baby with all the chromosomes. Yeah. And no extras. And ultimately, I mean, for number two, I will be rooting for a boy. I'll admit, already. Of course, same z's. Yeah, I don't need two of me.

I'm good with just one. Just one. Oh man. I'm gonna have two of you, as it is. Yes, you are. You lucky dog. I guess I get my hands, I get to kind of sculpt this one though, a little bit. Yeah, but you're so lucky of two girls.

That's so, that's cute. I don't get to sculpt you at all. You are who you are. I know. Yeah, I don't have much influence over any of that. You're a lucky duck. Oh, you know what I also wanted to talk about for those of you that follow our socials?

Why we wore hoodies. Because- You're talking about the- After, when we left the gender reveal... Yes, the paparazzi photos. That is why, okay, but that is why we wore hoodies. Because we were told, right before we left to go to Britney's, there was paparazzi outside. And this is because they just follow whatever Britney does.

And Britney posted on social media that she had put, like, napkins and plates for the gender reveal. So it was assumed we were gonna have a gender reveal party. And I'm sure they were so disappointed when like six people showed up. Right. That's true. Yeah.

There wasn't a crowd by any means, but that's fine. I mean, it wasn't a party. We got pizzas. No, I'm just saying paparazzi was like sitting outside being like, I don't know who that person is. Don't know who that person is. Tom Schwartz. Don't know who that person is. Don't know who that person is. Tom Schwartz, don't know who that person is. You know what I mean?

Yeah, Danny and Nia. Yeah, Danny and Nia the kids and a pizza guy. That's it. So anywho, online that day, I posted a black and white photo of us in hoodies. Later on, these paparazzi photos come out and they're in color of us in hoodies. And the hoodie that I had on was this Morgan Wallen hoodie.

And I guess in the photo, it kind of looks like this pinky brown, but it was like a tan hoodie. And everyone's like, so it is a girl because Kristen's wearing a pinky brown hoodie and she posted it in black and white. The reason I posted it in black and white is because Brittany shot the powder cannon thing.

She and Zach, like the spray, whatever. And it's cornflower. Well, it got everywhere is what we're getting to. I was so pink. We were covered. Our hair, shoes, Luke especially, like your shirt, your shirt was like this reddish color and your hair, shirt, skin, jeans, you were just pink.

Pure pink. Yeah, I didn't last very long under the cornflower. Once they popped and I breathed in the first bit of it, shirt, skin, jeans, you were just pink. Pure pink. I didn't last very long under the cornflower. Once they popped and I breathed in the first bit of it, I kind of ran off. So we're getting ready to leave and Brittany's like, oh my God, wait, paparazzi's outside, you're gonna be covered in pink.

And we're like, oh man. And we just wanted to be the ones to announce it when we were ready. We wanted to hold onto it for a little bit by ourselves and just enjoy. So she was like, okay, here, I have these hoodies. And then we're like cleaning off our shoes and anywho. I posted the black and white photo

because I was afraid that some internet sleuth, you guys are so hacky and good, would see like a little bit of pink on like our hoodie or on our hair or something and give it away. Yeah, and also if the sleuths had really been on it, they could go back to the paparazzi photo, zoom in on my shoe. Your shoe does have pink on it.

Zoom in on my shoe and see the little pink smudge or powder on the side of it. You could have been able to tell it for sure. I did notice that, but I don't think people thought to look for that. Probably not. So that's why we, that is why we did what we did,

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Integrate Shopify. It was funny, I saw Perez Hilton, shout out, he's so cute, he's a dad now, and he's just so different than he was 20 years ago. But I saw, I get Google alerts on myself guys, and he posted about our gender reveal and the smoke cannon thing. And he's like, he's like,

oh, smoke cannons, but not a gender reveal party. Fair enough. Brittany thought it would be cute for the photo and she was totally right. I didn't, yeah, I didn't know that was gonna be a part of it. I thought the balloon drop was it, but hey, it was worth it. Got some good photos. Isn't it wild But hey, it was worth it. Got some good photos. Yeah. Isn't it wild to be... ow. I just hit my toe on my Yeti.

And back to what we were talking about. Is it not wild to you? Maybe not because you've only been doing filming the show for a little bit, but to me it's wild not filming during big moments. It's nice, but it's kind of crazy, because I've just been used to, like, my whole life as an adult being on camera. Well, yeah, and they can't run cameras all year. No, of course not. I'm just saying, it's like crazy.

I've watched so many of my friends get married and have babies and, like, everything just being on the show. And I'm like, huh, that's just pretty wild. No, it's just pretty wild. No, it's still kind of weird to me that my life is so public. Nice, not kind of weird. It's still super freaking weird that my life is so public

and people recognize me that I've never met. It's still odd. Yeah, I mean, I agree with you. I still introduce myself to people that, I'm like, hi, I'm Luke. And they're like, I know. I do the same thing though. It's like we're not special.

We're just, people just know who we are because they get to watch us on TV. But I just think about, I know. I do the same thing though. It's like we're not special. People just know who we are because they get to watch us on TV. But I just think about, I was thinking the other day about like filming another season of The Valley, you know, like for next season, whenever that may be. Filming with a baby. Doing anything with a baby.

Doing everything with a baby. Well, clearly that's all foreign. I know, I'm like spitballing here, like just I was thinking about it. And I'm like, every little thing we do is gonna be like with a baby. Well, clearly, that's all foreign. I know, I'm spitballing here, I was thinking about it, and I'm like, every little thing we do is gonna be like, with a baby, it's so crazy, so exciting. Season one, Dani and Nia did it with twins that were about the same age as what we'll be working with. Yeah, pretty much exactly,

because the twins were born around the same time, yeah, that our babies do. We'll have to take some pointers. Or actually, no, we're going to have to have some serious child care. Because babies don't just, I don't know, cooperate. Cooperate. I think we're going to say like babysit themselves or something. No, I mean, just they're not going to necessarily cooperate. Oh, here babies, here's our schedule. You can get a sleep while we're filming. Babies come first when it comes to anything in life and we can totally handle it.

And people have had much harder jobs and lives and schedules that came before us and did it all just perfectly fine. Of course. I mean, I think it'll be just fine, but there's still lots of figuring to do. Of course there's a lot of figuring to do. We have lots of time to do it.

I'm just out of my first trimester. Hallelujah. I second that. Whoop, whoop, whoop. She made it. Whoop, whoop. I feel less crazy. You are less crazy.

I feel less crazy, I feel less miserable. I truly would never wanna do that. I mean, I would do it. I get it now, but those first eight to 10 weeks, really the whole first trimester, but eight to 10 weeks were just horrific and they lasted forever. You hate me less than you did a month ago? Yes, I hate you far, yeah.

I don't hate you anymore. Good, thank goodness. I did not like you at all for a while. I didn't like anything, I didn't like anyone. There were moments I didn't like my dog, which is crazy. And then he would like warm up, he would be like, sorry mom, and I was like, I know I actually love you, and just you. I've talked about it on Here For.

I was miserable, you guys. I was depressed, I was miserable. I couldn't get out of my head of being miserable, so I couldn't stop to have gratitude because I was just so stuck and wallowing about it and then feeling guilty about it, but being like, I can't help how I feel. And that's that.

I don't feel that way anymore. That's my point. It's so nice. I feel more tired though, which is really weird. Well, you didn't sleep much in the first trimester. I'll say I'd fall asleep before you, not even get eight hours and be up and you've been like, I've been up since 4 a.m. Like, okay, so you slept from hours? I can guess. I was going to bed pretty early though. Yeah. And you'd fall asleep and then wake up for hours and then fall asleep and wake

up for hours. And then like what continuous it was great if you got three to four hours straight. Yes, pregnancy insomnia was real. Yes, happy now. No, also just, I am so grateful that you have so many friends that are pregnant at the same time. You have some friends that you can talk to going through it. I mean, Meredith was on last week, obviously, you have another friend, Katie, who is further along.

I mean, from Courtney, her sister Brittany. Yeah, exactly. There's so many people that it's just, I think it's nice. It would feel even more lonely if you didn't know anybody that was pregnant. I totally agree. And would I wonder if all pregnant people feel this way, but I feel like everyone's pregnant right now.

Is it just because I'm pregnant or is everyone pregnant right now? Because I was just reading my fun pop culture news because obviously Giselle is pregnant we all know that. Kylie Kelsey is pregnant with her fourth girl and shout out to Kylie Kelsey's podcast because I have been waiting to hear mama speak ever since the first time I saw her have a little moment on the New Heights podcast. I'm just like, I love her. She's no bullshit. I just love her so much.

And I watched a little bit of her first, I think it was her first episode, but I watched like some clips on the Instagram, but she literally was talking about being pregnant. And she's like, I don't enjoy being pregnant. She's like, I'm nauseous all the time. She hates it. But she was like, it's a means to an end.

Like she wants to have kids. And I was like, it's a means to an end. Like, she wants to have kids. And I was like, it is a means to an end. Like, yes, queen of all mamas. Like, shout it from the rooftops for all of us to feel better. Because I feel like I saw Brittany Mahomes' maternity shoe for her third kid. I feel like they have a kid every three months, to be honest. But Brittany Mahomes, I feel like she's the girl who's like,

I love being pregnant. I just love it. I bask in it. And then she has this huge belly. She pops a baby out, and then three days later, she has a six-pack, and she's posing for Sports Illustrated. Did that really happen? She did pose for Sports Illustrated.

I don't know if it was three days after. I doubt it was three days later. I'm just saying, I doubt it was three days later. I'm just saying, I feel like she's that girl who just is like, I don't know, I just, I love pregnancy. Baby-making factory. Like she's just happy all the time, and she's like, ah, Patrick, you know,

Patty makes me breakfast in bed, and we have 17 nannies, and I'm just glowing from the inside out. And she never throws up. She can eat anything she wants. She doesn't gain like a millimeter on her arms or her like double chin. She doesn't even know what that means.

What's a double chin? She's like, I got skinnier during pregnancy. That's how I feel like Brittany Mahomes is. I'm sure that's not true. As far as how she really is. Now that I feel better, I've been thinking about like having conversations like with our doctor about like what the

birth plan is. And there is a lot with my age that it's like, I know we can't go past the due date, so should we plan on scheduling it? Is it safer for me to have a C-section? There are so many questions that I have, right? And I have a friend who's a doula who I'm going to be having her help me. Will you explain exactly what a doula is? She's a postpartum doula, so she's going to help me. Well, she'll help me during the pregnancy with like preparing like the nursery and things like that. Well, just like define it for me because I have a rough idea of what it is, but like the definition of a doula.

I didn't hear about a doula with my friends and family back in Indiana. This is a thing I'm learning about out here on the west coast. Okay. Dula is a woman typically without formal training who is employed to provide guidance and support to a pregnant woman during labor. Okay, so she'll be in the room? A postpartum Dula, a woman employed to provide guidance and support to the mother of a newborn baby. Okay, so it's a fancy name for a, I guess, I don't know, I didn't know these things. This was a thing that people hired or had doulas. My mom didn't have a doula. Your face right now. I'm sorry, this is all new to me.

I don't know. Okay. Well, I mean, it should be new to you because you've never had a baby. I'm fairly certain. I'll have to ask my sister. I don't think she's had a doula. No, I mean, a lot of people don't. I am lucky enough to have a good friend who is one. And because she was like,

she reminded me when we were trying to get pregnant, she was like, remember I'm a doula. And I was like, oh my God. A medulla oblongata. I am a doula. She reminded me that. And I was like, there's nothing better than I can think of than having this friend of mine, Mara, who is an amazing mother and who I've known for a very long

time, someone I trust very much, who's like super rad and like just I appreciate all of her values, the way she raises her kids. Like I just, and she's so, she's just, she's the best, okay, anywho. I was like, this feels right to have Mara help me along because I feel very clueless. And I know from all my friends telling me, you're not gonna know till you know. And then you're just gonna know.

Well, I don't like, I like to be in control and I like to know ahead of time. So the thought of having extra help when I'm feeling so uncertain makes it less scary for me. Yeah. Point that I was making is that once we start talking to our doctor about the birth plan, I was like, now that I'm feeling better

and not miserable anymore, I was always like, I want an epidural and I want this. Like you could tranquilize me. And I'm like, do I want to just do like no drugs, natural delivery? You're nuts. You don't want to do that. I thought you were gonna actually take me seriously.

There's no fucking way. No, I'm not taking that seriously for a point one second. I wanted to see if you would like go, what? You're like, no. Oh, it didn't work at all. Nope, you did not trick me on that one. You're like, I will give you an epidural myself. Yeah, doctor, give me that needle.

Or you'll take one instead. Yeah, give it to me. It'll be fine. Oh my God, I'm going to cry. That's so funny. Oh, so something will actually be discovered recently, or you discovered, and was on TV when I was dealing with some allergies recently. Labor games?

Oh, my God. This TV show? It's on TLC. Yeah, so they go to the delivery room. I'm trying to think, okay, tell us how it goes. I'm trying to figure out if this is real or not. It has to be real. So they come into a room with a woman in labor

and her man there, and ask, you know, how is it going? No contractions, you know, how often, how dilated are you, etc. Would you be willing to play a quick game? OK, so what I'm going to tell you is not true is that they're randomly walking into a room and saying you want to play a game because that room is already wired up. Those people are mic'd and they have their makeup done. Think about. But they definitely had to get people to agree to do this. For sure. But think about the hospital though. How often do they switch you in rooms and stuff?

You're on a bed on wheels. They're like, we're going to move you. We're moving you into this room for this reason. You just say, okay, you're in a hospital. You don't have to think about it. But they have glam. Oh, there's a curtain on this wall. The mothers? The mothers have light glam. Yes, they do. I watched it for like hours the other day. There is not. Okay, whatever you call glam, they might have a little, what do you call it? Concealer, foundation, I don't know.

They're like basic stuff, but they don't have eyeliner and lashes and they don't have glam. Might be a tiny bit of touch-up makeup. Some rouge. Sure, that's the word. It was just on the tip of my tongue. Okay, so just tell the story about this show because it is wild. Anyway, they come in and there's these lights and sounds and all the normal things, but

you play this game. It's like a trivia game. And if you get the questions right, you win baby things like diapers for a year or baby food or a stroller. And I don't know, I think it's super cool. I'm like, this actually sounds genius because it takes your mind off of what you're going through. You can win some things. I don't know, it sounds entertaining to me.

I hope we end up in that hospital. I would cut a bitch if somebody walked into my room and they were like, you want to play on a game show? I would like, get the fuck out of my room. Who let this crazy lady in here? Absolutely no. If you're having contractions once every like eight minutes, you're sitting there, you're gonna be bored. And Kristen, I know you better than you know yourself right now. You're gonna

be so bored. Why don't we have our own version without a camera? So you want me to set it up? I live my whole life under the scrutiny of a camera. How about we just do it ourselves? Okay. No, it's funny though. They do have a meter at the bottom that shows like it says how dilated you are. That's like this intensity of contractions and the duration between like every four minutes, six millimeters dilated.

Okay, the only thing I don't like about the show is when they get to the very, very end and it's always like $10,000 for your child's, your child's like college tuition. Right. That they will give you right now and it can appreciate until they're 18. Will appreciate.

Or it's like this lavish vacation for after you give birth. Wait, what? It's not one or the other. No, that was a vacation before you got to the 10,000. The 10,000's the top tier. Oh, okay, well whatever. But it's like when they don't win, when they get it wrong. And you're about to go in,

you're literally about to deliver a baby and you're feeling like shit and you have contractions and then they're like, whomp whomp, sorry you didn't win, thanks for playing. No, but you already got things though. It's like, oh, you already got diapers for a year. You got $500 cash. You got these other things. You still have more than you started with.

So it's not like a whomp whomp situation. You're very positive. Yes. Everybody wants it all. But you don't want to be like upset because you didn't get it all because you only got half of the stuff that they were trying to give you. I just don't want to be disappointed in that moment. It's not the moment for disappointment.

Fair. All I'm saying is if... My goodness. This show, if it really is, they walk in and you're not expecting anything, you get something. You're not expecting to be given these things when you're in labor, right? I want to be like a guest host on it and turn into Kristen Claus and I'm gonna be like, listen, if you don't know the answer, I will be your umbilical cord, which is what they call That's your lifeline. Your lifeline.

Yeah, right. You get one umbilical cord, which you can call on a nurse or ask a family member. So I'll be the guest host and I'll be like, just ask me because I already know the answer. I can figure it out. Yes. Trust me, I know the answer. Oh my God, that fucking show. I got a question for you. How much do you believe in family history

determining the sex of the baby in certain situations? Like there are some families, you know, it's like they always have all boys, right? Has that been studied? Is that like a genetic thing or is it just that lucky? Someone flips heads every time, you know? I have no idea. Because there are some, I personally know families

that had three or four boys and then the one or two kids that have now been married and have kids, they've only had boys. And it's like, I don't understand how that works because it seems like it's still a lottery situation. I truly don't know. It's never even crossed my mind, if I'm being honest. So you and I both come from families with both.

With both. Right. Both of our immediate families, we both have girls first. Our mothers both birthed a girl first. But I don't think that necessarily has anything to do with it. No, I'm thinking it does. I don't know why, but it's something

that needs to be looked into more. Maybe there is a study we need to do more research on, but it's really interesting to me. You have friends that have all boys or all girls, right? Do you know about their? I do have a friend that is from... She is one of three girls, and she and her sister are both pregnant with girls.

Well, that's what I'm saying. We're just all convinced that her dad is not meant to ever have a boy. Like, obviously not a son or a grandchild. I guess in families like that, I guess I do think that it... It's just genetics or something. But then, I mean, at some point, someone's got to have a way for the world to keep turning. Of course. Well, that's why there are families with all boys.

Yeah. I don't know. I don't know the answer to that. I didn't think you did. I was just speculating on it with you to ask if that's something you thought about. I want to talk about something different for just one second because I read something today that it got to me. So I'm going to hold a very small intervention for myself. Got to you in a good or bad way. I don't know what we're talking about.

Do you know what an emotional spender is? You? An emotional spender? Someone that orders 10 things from Amazon a day? So I have been thinking about this because I'm definitely not a minimalist by any means, but I also don't like stuff. Like stuff around me frustrates me. Everything has to have its, you know that's true. Right. And I hate golfing and fishing. No, things have to have their place. I don't like clutter. Right. I really don't. It drives me fucking crazy. But so I was thinking about it, like if stuff frustrates me, why do I keep buying more stuff? Like I'm the problem. I'm the cycle I need to break. Yes, I get rid of all the boxes. So yes, I know. And then I randomly read. Well,

also, to be fair, I don't like leaving the house. So that's also my issue is that like, I used to love going for a Target run. Now I'm like target.com. Thanks so much. You know what I mean? But anyway, I randomly fell upon, you know, it's somewhere in my, it was either Instagram or like Google search, something. I ran into this thing about emotional spending and I was like, huh, what's, what is it exactly? And apparently it's to deal with anxiety. And I've done it a lot more in my first trimester than in my whole life. We have literally had stacks of Amazon boxes blocking the doorway.

Yeah. But I leave treats out for the delivery drivers. You do treat the delivery drivers well. But now that I'm aware, I think I'm holding an intervention for myself. Okay. I think I'm out of the crazy zone of first trimester and I can accept the fact that I was emotionally spending.

Hold on, before you do that, let me give you my Christmas list real quick. Let's put a hold on this. Your Christmas list is under the tree, bitch. Not for me, for everyone I need to buy for. Okay. For all my list of people I need to get Christmas gifts for. You knock that out, then we'll do this intervention, okay?

Which isn't that funny because then I make my sister do all the shopping for like our family. My brother and I just go in a group chat and we're like, Casey, we'll Venmo you. Thanks for doing all the work. It's just weird. Anyway, truthfully, I truthfully read about this and it was like, I don't want to get into the details because it's a little embarrassing. But one of the things where buying lots of things

like multiple items and then like returning a lot of things. And I tend to do that. Now granted a lot of it is clothing because I'm in this weird phase where I don't look pregnant, I look fat and like things don't exactly fit me but they don't not fit me. So I do order a lot of things and return them.

And I order like multiple sizes of things. But beyond that, I have to stop making excuses for myself. But I think it was all my anxiety because most of my purchasing was happening at like four or five in the morning. It's worse than drunk purchasing. People like drunk purchase when like late at night and they're like, what did I even buy? I wake up, get a package from I don't even know what

and I was like, when did I order that? I have to go back through my email, type in some company I've never even heard of. It's like 5 11 a.m. on November 10th. I was like, what? Remember that shirt I bought for you just recently for the photo shoot we did today? Oh yeah, yeah.

It showed up and you're like, when did I order that? I was like, where is this even from? So I had to type in this company name for this button-down men's shirt, and it was four or five in the morning, some random day. I was like, totally don't remember doing this. So think about this real quick. I blacked out. I know you've already committed to this intervention.

But think about the anxiety loop here of having to return packages, because that creates anxiety for you as well. So you order these extra things and then you get them ready to return. But some things have to go USPS, some things can go UPS or FedEx. Some things are happy returns, which is like at a UPS place usually.

Some things are FedEx, which normally I don't buy things that have to go back to FedEx because I don't even know where a FedEx place is. And sometimes I get them mixed up and then I have to go to the post office twice. And I'm like, oh God. Anyway, this whole anxiety loop, you're creating more anxiety by over ordering these things and then ordering things because you have anxiety.

And then we just have too much stuff. And I complain about having too much stuff and not big enough space. Creating more anxiety. Yeah. Oh yeah. So intervention held, note to self. I'm gonna need help with this. I'm reaching out for help. Accountability.

I do. I just, I don't know how, do we take my phone away at night? Like, I don't know. That would be great, honestly. No, because you would sleep better too. You know all this stuff. And I was really good when we were trying to get pregnant about not having my phone at night.

I was keeping it 20 feet away from me because that's what I heard would help. And then I'm like, I just need to play games all night long to cope with my anxiety. But I have anxiety because I have a fucking blue light staring at my face. For 12 hours a day. Oh, God. OK, I feel better. I feel a lot better after saying that. I really do, just like weight lifted. Something not so fun that happened to us over the weekend,

we'll be brief about this, but I feel like it's important to talk about because if other women experience it, I, this is what other women that I honestly read about online and a few friends like, are what got me through this. So we had a scare last Friday. I started bleeding really heavily. And it was out of nowhere. We were just on the couch. I wasn't doing anything crazy. And I just panicked and we called my doctor. And obviously he was like, this could just relax.

Like, yeah, I think you should go to the hospital. Let's just see what's going on. So Luke keeping, I know I know how cool you're going to be when I go into labor, because you just had that shit. You're like, okay, ER, ER number one. Nope, not this place. ER number two, definitely not this place, like packed. Didn't even know if they could really see us

because not everyone has like- We didn't even go into ER number two because I got up the front and I said, are all these people waiting to go in? I knew we weren't like life or death emergency, so we weren't gonna get bumped the front. Second one probably had 30 people waiting in the ER room. I'm like, this is gonna be all night.

The first one, two ambulances had shown up right before we got there. And they said, I'm like, what are we talking, an hour or two? They said, we have no idea. All of our focus is on the ambulances that just come in. And there were some people in the waiting room as well. And there were only four or five ahead of us. But it's like, okay, no idea.

These ambulances could be, I don't know, if you watch the shows, you know, they could have a six hour surgery to save someone's life and not even get in before dawn. So go to the third one, shout out to Cedars in Tarzana. Cedars, yeah. So yeah, we drove all the way there and they were fantastic. They were fast, as fast as they could be for an emergency room and efficient and really made me feel seen because I think what can be so difficult, and I have a friend who's an emergency surgeon in the ER and obviously it's a case by case thing who actually is

in the emergency, but when you're someone like, I'm sure if I had one time I got bit by a dog in the face and I was full-fledged panic went to the ER. Now in my mind in that moment I'm bleeding out from my face, right? Is it really that bad? Of course it's not. In my mind, why am I not going in front of these five people? You always, not you always, but I always think, I think a lot of people think their emergency feels more urgent than someone else's, right? So me, I'm now at the third place. It's been quite a while, but I'm still bleeding. And that's the scary part.

And I don't know what this means because I'm in full panic mode. How much have I actually lost? How much blood am I going to keep losing? Is this going to keep happening? Is it not going to stop ever? There's crazy thoughts that go through your head. So we're really lucky to get

in. And I'm so grateful that both of my doctors, my fertility doctor and my OB, are always on call for me and willing to like talk me through things and keep me as calm as they can. But obviously everything worked out. We still don't totally know what happened and we'll know more next week at our next doctor's appointment. However, I have heard that this actually does happen to a lot more people. And I didn't obviously call a bunch of my friends that day, but when I ended up telling one of my girlfriends the other day about this, she was like,

oh my God, that happened to me with her son, who's now a toddler. She was like, that exact thing happened to me. It's crazy how many people this actually happens to. So what we think happened is that there was a shift in my placenta. The blood was all mine. The blood was not the baby's. We did find out at the hospital once we got in to do an ultrasound. We saw her on the ultrasound.

We saw... I get emotional. We saw her heartbeat. We got to listen to her heartbeat. The tech was so, like, fantastic was so fantastic at making us feel good and making us feel calm in that way and let us see the ultrasound. And she was moving on there, moving and shaking. Nothing was wrong.

So that was enough for me to like, I don't care if I'm bleeding, I don't care what's happening down there as long as she's safe. The scary part then was once we go home, obviously we just have to deal with this, is that now it's tomorrow, Saturday, the next day, Sunday. Can't go to the doctor.

Just gotta hope and pray that that ultrasound was like, hey, she's fine and she's gonna be fine. Not like tomorrow, God forbid. And the ER doctors, obviously, they're not my doctor. It's not an OB. Like they do the best they can. They're just telling me what they have to tell me. But the paperwork they sent me home with said, you may have had a miscarriage or you may

be having a miscarriage. No, it said it was a threatened miscarriage. Threatened abortion. And it said, you may be having a miscarriage. It's exactly what the word said. It said threatened miscarriage, not threatened abortion. Threatened abortion or possible miscarriage is exactly what the word said. I said threatened miscarriage, not threatened abortion. Threatened abortion or possible miscarriage is exactly what the paperwork said, which is odd.

When I looked it up online, it said threatened miscarriage. Okay, that's the term I saw. Right. Okay. But the paperwork they sent me home with, and it said, it was like this big sheet of paper telling me what could happen below, but it's like, you may be having a miscarriage. This could be happening. And I'm like, this is like the last thing you wanna read,

especially after you saw an ultrasound and the baby's perfectly fine. Well, I think rule number one is don't go to Google if you wanna feel better about what you're feeling. Yeah. I mean, that's like, that does not work. Typically it's like, oh, I've got back pain. Oh, you're probably dying.

I know. If you Google it, you know. I will say, I did find this thread on Reddit that really made me feel a lot better. And I started understanding about the hematoma and the hemorrhaging possibilities and what it all meant. But that's just like one in a million that that's going to happen, that I'm going to find something on Reddit that's going to make me feel better. Anyway, it was like a huge scare. I believe wholeheartedly, and I don't talk about religion a huge scare. I believe wholeheartedly, you know, and I don't talk about religion a lot,

but I believe wholeheartedly that God and Luke got me through that, because I didn't think I was going to. I called Nia and Danny, or text them from the car in like a flash, I didn't even tell you this at the time. Like right when we got in the car, I text Nia and I said, "'Can you guys please pray for us?' Because I believe in the power of their prayer, like they're very faith-based people. And like, I think I've never prayed so hard, like ask for something.

So, but everything's fine. And then we went to the OPM Monday as I'm crying, and she was sucking her thumb, which was so crazy. So everything's great. Yeah. So that was a little heavy, but I just wanted to talk about it because I feel like that's what people come to us to listen and go, oh shit, that happened to me before. I didn't know. Blah, blah, blah. We did also read that this is the timing of this at the end of the first beginning of the second trimester is the most common time that it happens. If it were to happen.

If it were to happen, right? If you're going to have bleeding in a pregnancy that's going to also be still be successful and healthy at that time, there can be heavy bleeding and not affect the child at all. Right. And I think that's what frustrated me the most because I'm like, I'm past the time. I'm past the scary time. I'm past the danger zone. I'm past the danger zone. Why is this happening?

But it was all fine and great and well and it wasn't her blood, it was mine and everything's fine. So, hallelujah. Well, I just want to end this on a couple fun little celeb notes. Selena Gomez is engaged. Holla, to, you don't care. She's engaged to Benny Blanco. Her ring is engaged. Holla! To, you don't care. She's engaged to Benny Blanco.

Her ring is stunning. It's a marquee shaped diamond. They are the cutest little couple that I watched from afar. Smitten, they had a little picnic with Taco Bell. And then I read it was like an impromptu like front get together. Wait, they had a Taco Bell picnic?

Yes. Okay, now I'm a fan. Yeah. All right, now I'm a fan. I did hear that Selena Gomez has watched The Valley. Yeah, same. Yes. Okay. I'm a fan. Yeah. All right. Now I'm a fan. I did hear that Selena Gomez has watched the Valley. Yeah, same. Okay. Well, we love you, Selena. And I'm so happy for you. And oh my god, it's so cute. And they're like, just so cute. And they I read like interviews where they talk about each other, mostly her interviews. That's so great.

I'm sorry. I'm stuck on this Taco Bell picnic. This is that's so that's so great. We're having a Taco Bell picnic in honor of their engagement. Okay, let's celebrate their engagement with a Taco Bell picnic. Boom, done, tomorrow. Taco Bell picnic it is. I have a question. Can I order a picnic basket so we can have a picnic? Oh my goodness.

We have baskets. We have things for this. Oh my goodness, that we're going to use once for Taco Bell. Yeah. Maybe we'll have more picnics or maybe it'll end up in the garage. It'll be in the garage. 100 percent. I'm acknowledging without just spending. Sorry. Oh, OK. My last bit of news. I haven't told you this yet.

Michael Jordan sold his house, that 32,000 square foot mansion in Chicago. Remember looking through photos with me? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I do. So it was originally, 13 years it's been on the market. It was originally listed at 29 million. Okay. Do you wanna take a guess what it sold for?

13 years, it should sell for more than that. Oh no, nobody want, no, it's been on the market for 13 years. Nobody wanted the house. That's the problem. Okay. So they had to reduce it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but like 32,000 square feet though. I'm going to tell you a smidgey bit about it. 32,000. A basketball court, tennis court, indoor gym, circular infinity pool. Amenities for the mansion include nine bedrooms, 19 bathrooms, a cigar room, and a library. Okay, so I'm supposed to guess it came down from 29 million? 16.8. Chicago's northern suburbs.

Sorry, where is it? What did you say? Almost Wisconsin. 16.8. Nine and a half. Get out of town. Are you kidding me? Nine and a half million. You know what you could do with that? Never mind, I'm not gonna go there. Isn't that wild?

It's crazy. Eminem had a house, like a castle of a house north of Detroit, so. Or what I thought was an unreasonably low number. It was like three or four million, but it was such a massive place that I thought that should be a $10 million home. I don't think anyone's spending that much

in that area of Michigan though. Yeah, you might be right. I'm not sure. I mean, I've never heard of anything for three or four million, if I'm being honest. But I don't really look. But anyway, I just thought that you would think that was crazy because we've looked at this house extensively. Like, we had this one day where I went down a rabbit hole, and I'm like, well, I mean, if you're a Michael Jordan fan,

I mean, God's green earth right there, God's gift to the world. Like, everything is like number 23, like the gate has number 23. It comes with like... There should have been a clause in it that he has to sign the basketball court and like, signature on certain things. Yeah, it comes with certain memorabilia that is signed. But even so, it's just like, do you want to live in a house that literally just threw up Michael Jordan all over?

I guess you can just redo it, but why would you? Anyway, 29 million to nine and a half, 67% reduction in price. Ouch. I wonder what he bought it for. He didn't buy it, he built it. He built it. I wonder how much he was all in. Make sure we look it up. Let me do some math here real quick. Probably, here's my guess. I'm guessing he built it for around five million. That was a de-sguess.

Pay for his house. Oh! Okay, this is an AI overview. This cannot be right. It says Michael Jordan paid 50, five zero million to build his mansion in Highland Park, Illinois. He bought the land in 1991, moved into the home in 94. How do they, I mean, it's the AI overview.

So who knows, but five zero, five zero million in the nineties nonetheless. Yeah, that doesn't add up. He definitely did not make any money on that house because it definitely cost him more than nine million, nine and a half million to build. I think he's okay because he's a billionaire. You're right. What the hell am I saying? He's not sweating a few million dollars.

Just like I read, Jeff Bezos is donating a million dollars to Donald Trump's inauguration. Just paying the piper. That's what a lot of these big businesses do. Anyway, that's my note for the day. Thanks for listening. That's a bad note to end on. But thanks for listening, guys. We love you so much and we will talk to you next week.

Thanks for listening. Make sure to follow us on social media. You can follow me on all platforms at Kristin Doty and follow Luke on Instagram at Luke double underscore Roderick. Be sure to click the subscribe button so you can stay up to date with new episodes. Thanks for listening. See you next week.