Sex With Emily - B Is For Bedroom - Not Boring

Episode Date: March 7, 2019

On today’s show, Emily is talking about ways to eliminate boring out of the bedroom because 45% of Americans are bored with their sex lives. Emily takes your calls on roleplay with a full role-play-by-play to help you get great results. Plus, why changing up one thing in the bedroom can make a mind-blowing difference, and why you should never compare yourself to your partner’s ex. Thank you for supporting our sponsors who help keep the show FREE: We-Vibe, Bombas, Good Vibrations, and SiriusXM. Follow Emily on all social: @sexwithemily. For even more sex advice, tips & tricks, visit: sexwithemily.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. On today's show, I'm talking about ways to take the boring out of the bedroom, as well as taking your calls. Topics include, this just in, 45% of Americans are bored with their sex lives. How do you stop yourself from becoming a statistic? Why doing just one thing different can mean a world of change in the bedroom? A role play by play. How to really get a good scenario going along with the results. And why you shouldn't compare yourself to your partner's ex, especially in the Pants department. All this and more, thanks for listening. Book into his eyes.

They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Betrubized, they call them in a fight on day. Hey, Avaline, you got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got every stand. Oh, my.

The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common knowledge? What do you mean, like laundry? It's drinks? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh, my God. I'm off here. I'm so drunk. Being bad feels pretty good. You know, Avaline's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex With Emily, we're talking about sex relationships and everything

in between. For more information check out sex with Emily.com, please subscribe on iTunes or wherever you listen. We love when you leave us a comment. You can also find me on SiriusXM Radio Star's channel 109. I am there Monday through Friday 5-7 Pacific and it's amazing. You guys should totally call in. You get a free 30-day trial. sexwithamily.com slash SXM call in. Triple 8. 947-827-7. As always, follow us across all social media at SexLM across the board. We've got some great stories on there doing a lot of giveaways and tips to help you

have better sex. So what you're all about, enjoy the show. 45% of Americans think their sex life is stuck in a rut. 7-10 of those admitted they could use a drastic boost in excitement when it comes to getting down between the sheets. I mean, that doesn't really surprise me. Like, I thought it would be more than that, actually. I feel like most people get into a rut.

And if you just embrace your rut, like they always say this when you're going to do like a stressful time, you're like miserable or depressed, like embrace your sadness, like embrace the struggle. And I, I fucking hate that. But I do. But, but the truth is, like, as long as you can like embrace this and embrace this and be like, okay, it's fine that we all, it's boring or whatever, we want to spice it up. I think embrace that boredom and then say, we're gonna make it out of the share.

I'm cool with that. It's the other part of this that is, we're gonna give you some tips here. 62% rely on exactly the same positions every single time they do the deed. It's the same thing. Like it could be like those body lines on the bed like when someone dies or something like that.

Like a crime scene. Like a crime scene or like this is where you go. And to me that can be great. You both get off, but there's just more to it than just the same old thing. So and that three and five people want to experiment with new positions and they want to add some spice to their sexual routine, I thought I should give you some. Reverse crowd girl. Now it's not that like it's a crowd girl woman on top. When you reverse it, it's the same thing, be a spin around and you can even get off the penis that you're

on and then place yourself back onto it. It's more specific instructions, but it can be really hot because your partner gets to look at you from behind and that can be great. But also you can touch yourself, you can get more clitorial stimulation in that position. It's really sexy. Don't make the Ikea of sex too. You get exact directions too, which I love about you. It's so funny you say that because we talked about this, that I've often not, I you say I can't talk about positions on the show.

I thought it was harder because you can't see me, but now I feel like I'm, I just like I want them to get it, but that was a good one. Spin it around. Right, spooning position. I mean, they might seem obvious, but I love spooning when you wake up in the morning,

and you're like, oh, I want to sex, but it's a nice or tired, like just spooning position. It totally works. That's a great one. And then missionary with a twist, you can put your legs in the air over your partner. So here's the thing, anytime you move your legs around a missionary, you're kind of mixing up or your partner can hit like the different spots they can hit.

So sometimes it can be like deeper, deeper G spot, or maybe it's even brushing your clitoris more, I guess it wouldn't be in that position. No, it would be more G spot, but even putting a pillow underneath you, underneath your backside, and like your pelvic floor lifts up, it can be a world of different. Those are just like little tiny things you can do that switch it up.

And I'm telling you, I did reverse, I don't, do you remember this story? My reverse cowgirl story, James. Yeah. Whenever I see that, like she remembers, but what time I forgot about myself, and as I was some guy, I was dating, and I just, I'm like, I'm a risk calgirl. Like just, you know, no, it just do it. And it's one that one thing I'm talking about that's like hot and different. I feel like a lot of people forget about that position.

Just because it's like, if you're turning around and you just like automatically go into like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm a risk calgirl. Like just, you know, no, it just do it.

And it's one that one thing I'm talking about that's like hot and different. I feel like a lot of people forget about that position. Just because it's like if you're turning around you just automatically go into some form of like doggie style, but it's like reverse cowgirls cool. And then if you lean back you can still like, that's how you can get more of that clueless simulation to go. Good shame. Right.

Lean back exactly. And the paint not too don't need forward though. Because if that feels forward, you break his penis. If you lean too far forward need for though. I guess. Well, because then it's like, if that feels for or you know, you break his penis, if you lean too far forward, you won't break it. I want to see the Lorraine above it, film too, by the way. No, I've been wanting to watch that so bad. I can't. I can't take our broken penises without that.

But you're talking, but you're also talking about too, if I'm catching your drift, is that even with the spicier positions, even doing that same position every time is still wrong also. Like you need to, you need to mix in a missionary or a spooning. Like it can't just be reverse out girl either. And you could go exactly, and you could go to that or you're go to position still,

but just try something new because you also might be surprised that it, that it feels differently. Like you're like, oh, I didn't know I could feel this sensation. What's the best way in the moment, like to kind of let your partner know that you want to switch positions? That's a good question.

I think you're just like, I just get off and get back. Emily's in charge. If you're not Emily. I'd say that if you're not Emily or Jamie. Wait, what just described was not as deep in you a power. I just get off and feel what I want to get. You think that, but it's like so many people don't, they just, because that's the thing,

that's why they're having sex in the same positions because they're sitting there and they're like, why are we not in a position, but they're not doing anything about it. I got it, I got it, okay, so I get it, I'm gonna do this for a long time. So, because they get her called in, like, how do I ask her about the vibrator

that she just used and like, you could call him and ask her, right? Yeah, like, we said it during the break, like no one's going to, no one's ever called you back and screened with you like she was mad at you. Right. Right. No, but you're right. So I think that you could say this would be another great thing if you're not comfortable

in the moment is another great conversation to have when you're talking about your plans for your sex life for the new year, you could say I think it would be hot. I love the sex we're having. Remember, ego struck,ruck, both of you. Because the second someone brings up something about sex, we automatically think that we are bad lovers. Like our partner could be like, so that's why I love the compliment sandwich.

Babe, our sex has been so amazingly, like keep thinking about last week, when you gave me that triple-standard blowjob. That's actually not a thing. Is that a thing? I was gonna say, that's a new one. What the fuck is that? I don't know, but I don't know. I don't know? I was gonna say that's a new one. What the fuck is that? I don't know, but I don't want to do that.

I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is.

I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is.

I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. I know what a blow job is. What do you think about reverse? Colleagues, let's look at a book, like my book, Hot Sex, has some great, what I love about it is there's pictures you open up to like any day and you're like, let's try this, let's try that. I mean, just go online. Cosmo has a lot of positions. I feel like one of the things you guys do so well here, I mean, when you guys are talking,

is you give out homework too? Yeah. Which I love because then it's like, all right, it's all right. So like if somebody's having that stuck in the same position, what do you recommend? Is it like try at least two new positions while the next time you have sex with your partner? Like, one, just one, just be a different position. Just one position that's different,

because that's what, thank you, because Steve, you've reminded me of this earlier that it's one thing, like adding one conversation could change everything saying just having that conversation I want to try it but no I don't think you want to be trying a million different positions that because then that gets confusing but because then when you try just you add just one new ingredient a new

position then you can be like oh did I like that but if you tried to you'd be like was it when my leg was spinning in the air and I was hanging you know doing the doubles standard flip blow. Oh no. You will know. All these names. I mean, she was going for triple axle blow job. I lost triple axle.

That's what I was going for. Yeah. But there are a lot of things. I threw away my ice skates. Exactly. That was a really good one though. Or just trying to toy. All of it is fun.

Well, that's what that was came in my pleasure package from you. Which ones do you love? I can't. You know, I don't know the names. We've only tried it once you gave my wife the advice, like you should try them on your own and like see kind of what you're into. And we've kind of talked about, you know, that experience

and we try to incorporate a little bit. And it's been great. And one of the best advice I've ever gotten from you too, you're like, this is gonna be new for you guys. Like, have a couple of drinks, loosen up. You know what I mean? There's nothing wrong with that being totally loose and talking about it before and after

and kind of checking in. And it was great. Okay, good. I'm just asking, good. Well, I'll talk to Lauren, because I need to know. Yeah, Lauren will tell you that you're Q2 patches. Do you know what it looks like?

Yeah, Q2. Because we can get, I don't know. Purple, it could be the touch or the touch. Probably the rape of the touch. We just know them. The Wevi touch maybe. Is it literal? Like this big? Yeah, I love that one. It's dark in there guys. I don't know what's going on. But that's a great one. And then we gave Nick a toy, which one do we give you? The Adam? It's the it's the G vibe mini. Oh, the G vibe mini. That's a great one. I'm excited to use it. Yeah,, the G vibe mini. That's a great one.

I'm excited to use it. Yeah, that's a really good one. And that's a good one too for hand jobs and blood jobs, right? Yes. That's another little tip. We'll show you after. I mean, we'll show you. You're going to make my girlfriend so happy on the floor.

Aww. I'm so excited to break this out for her. She has no idea too. I'm going to just be a K-Babe. Yeah. I've got a good one for you. I will. They come have charge, but it's never enough.

It's my tip. Yeah, you want to make sure it's that full power. Emily, I'll start with the charger later. The first time I ever met Emily, was she was talking about the magic wand. And you were talking about it up there and you're like, remember that fucking plug? I would always kick it out and then you're trying

to plug it back in and get it going again. Yes. And you're like, it's the wireless one and make sure it's always charged. Always charged. The rechargeable magic bond. That's a great gift. What else were we going to talk about? Well, I was just going to say the worst betrayal of time. Yeah. I got so off on a rant. Yeah. Well, the study starts talking about sex toys. So I think that that's oh, I knew that. I

felt that because I was like, there was something here I was going to mention to you. No No I did because I remembered earlier. All right this is why. So but there was so much more because 39% revealed they're embarrassed about using a sex toy for the first time. And another 35% in mid to feeling anxious well for the 80% are timidated by the whole experience which brings us what to Steve just said. And it got me back to like, oh, you're right. That is hard the first time. Like I can get it like that bridge of just being like, we've never used soy to like, babe, I've got a toy.

Like what do we do? So it turns out though all these people want to use one. Like they're like those surveyed were more likely to try it if it was with someone they've been a long-term relationship with. And so these are the 10 items also top purchase from a sex store. Was number one lubricant, number two a vibrator.

Of course, number three lingerie, number four deltoes. But, oh, coccrings, number four, oh handcuffs, then coccrings. So I think of sex toys too, you guys, if you've been wanting to try just one thing, I love the new Chopin of the Pave because they've like the, the crystals in them. They're like Tiffany's box, but they're vibrator.

Like literally, it's like that other little blue box. What's your advice Emily? Cause the advice you gave me was like, your wife should try them on her own and see kind of what fits her and what she's really into. And then you guys should have a conversation and then you incorporate it and see how it goes. Have you done that part yet?

Yeah, we do. Oh, you asked her. You tried it, okay? Yeah, we, she tried what she liked and we got in there and see how it goes. Have you done that part? Yeah. Oh, you asked her. You tried it, okay? Yeah, she tried what she liked and we got in there and I just forget the name of it. But what I'm asking you is that do you recommend everyone kind of goes that route or is this something where you guys can try them all? Like, either way, words are... I think it's either way.

It depends. I mean, honestly, if you've never used a toy before, I think that for women that we've so much anxiety already around our orgasms and if someone's watching us, even if it's our partner we love, love, love. Sometimes you have to check in with a person that might be it could be harder because you kind of on your own want to test drive in and see how to do it, make your orgasm faces or whatever you do. I mean, hopefully you do that in front of your partner as well.

So for some people, yeah, I would suggest that, but other couples are just like, yeah, let's just try it together. So I think it's a case by case basis, but I think it's good to talk about it first. Like Nick, you said you're bringing around, but you probably talked about sex toys before with her, right? Or be honest. Yeah, we have, but we just never got around

to capitalizing on the conversation. Cool, so they've already covered it. Yeah. And then you could try it, like it'll be fun, and she might, it might be a new sensation, and it might not be much. Like it's cool, let's go back to sex and she might take it home and then play with it.

You know what I mean? So there's a lot of different ways to go. I think it's really just checking in and seeing what people are comfortable with. But for me, I know there's some toys. I'm like, I gotta, my G spot found it on my own with a toy. I wouldn't have wanted anyone else in the world. There are some toys that are like,

you're like, okay, I need some time to like, actually read the manual, think about this. Like, the mystery vibe, crescendo, that thing has six different motors. It's like, it can I need some time to like, actually read the manual, think about this. Like, the mystery vibe, crescendo, that thing has six different motors. It's like, it can be any toy you want. Like it rolls around, it can be a cock-ring, it can be like, I don't know. So I just think of like a 90-slap bracelet,

but a vibrator, but bigger. Yeah, and they can fall in different shapes and stuff, so you gotta read the manuals, all right? God, working for you has really changed my life. I'm like, I'm just, for real, right? For real, right? For real right? I just wasn't having it in November. All right guys, we're gonna take a quick break

and we come back onto your calls. Okay, let's talk to Marie. She's 48 in Illinois. She's got a question about role play with her boyfriend. All right, Hey Marie. How are you girls tonight? Great. Thanks for calling in.

We love a good role play question. We love role play. Well, my role play question is basically this is going to be the first time that I'm actually getting into a character. Okay, and so I'm planning this for tomorrow, and I have a great... We have an extremely free, very open, very loving, intimate, like it's an amazing chemistry between myself and my partner. So he's all in.

Okay. The thing that I'm worrying about is because this is the first time that I'm actually getting in character from the head to toe, like with the whole outfit to go with who I'm going to be. Like I'm freaking out, thinking how am I going to stay in this, like I don't know if I'm going to laugh. If I'm, I mean, and it's okay. I know it's okay if we start laughing. Because we are going to laugh. Of course. But I don't even know how to get my mind in that frame of, you know what I'm saying? Just staying in the care sector? I guess, I know, maybe this is a silly question.

No, no, not at all. No, Marie, no silly questions ever on this show. Because I actually think it's a great question. What I love that you said was, though, I know we're going to laugh because you will laugh. It's your husband you said, you've been with them for years. Yes. No, no, this is my boyfriend. Oh, boyfriend.

He said boyfriend. Okay. But whatever it is, it's awkward, it's weird you might laugh. But I think, okay, so you have this persona, do you want to tell me who it is or what it is? Who you are? Well, yeah. So, I kind of came up with this idea.

I love it. I love it. OK. Even ticket holder. Yeah, he's a season ticket holder for the Chicago Cubs. OK. So I decided that I was going to be a batgirl. OK. And so I went and I got this really cute.

It's like a totally sexy. I got it at Lover's Lane. It's like a totally sexy, I got it at Lovers Lane, it's like a cubby little tube. It's got like the little studs, rhinestones around the cub's logo and I got like a hair extension ponytail with the baseball cap and I've got the stockings and the six inch heels. I mean it's going to be the slutty bat girl but my my idea with that, at dinner, I'm going to present him with a little card just with the logo on it. Because he knows I'm doing something.

He just doesn't know what it is. And then when we get back to the hotel, because we're getting a hotel room, because we're both single parents. And we want to be when we do things like this, we don't want to even be in our own personal spaces. We'd rather just place a hotel. So anyway, so we'll go back to the room. So I'm going to need to first of all get dressed. So that's going

to take probably like 10 minutes, and I'm going to be like screaming at myself in a bathroom, like, oh my god, I can't believe I have to walk out there and actually do this. But I thought that what I would do is I would approach him and, you know, just call him by his last name and tell him that I'm the bad girl for the Chicago Cubs and that he is to receive the MVP treatment as a season ticket holder and and then I don't even know where I go from there. Oh okay you're so great. And I'm so like flustered. Oh my god.

No Marie I love this okay, this is so good. So you're gonna come out of the bathroom in the hotel. No, deep breaths, we got this Marie, I'm gonna help you. I know, I know. Okay, no, I get it, because you're like, oh, then what, I'm the season ticket holder. So you come out in your sexy outfit and he's gonna be like, oh babe, that's so hot.

I mean, you'll freak out and you'll be like, yes, mister. So I think we gotta put a persona around this back girl Like I think that you should either write it out right now. We could talk about it like what's your name? What did what what do you do when you're not swinging bets? What do you when you're not cleaning but like think about what you might? So that I'm totally like in a dialogue and how to pull character. I think that's like about, yeah, I about, oh see, this is what I need. Okay, okay, that's what I'm here. That's what I'm here. I told you we got you, girl, we got you.

So, so you're like, maybe you're like, I need a name, and I need a name. Where you're from. Yeah, you got a history, you got the job, because you're trying to like, you always wear a Cubs fan. When you were a little girl, your dad took you to the Cubs games, and your dream was to be a back girl I mean nice guys like mr. VP who could buy the fancy seats and

You've been looking at him in the stands buying his popcorn or go into the Cubs games Or I don't know what ever people do with the cup. I've been to Cubs games, but I can't think of I'm not a Baseball person, but anyway, okay, so that would be something thinking about who she is and like what you are and like Whatever fun alter ego, this even give her a full-on name. So you can banter about her, just decide who she is and where she's come from. So that would just be fun

because you'd have some dialogue to go off of, and you could even write it out. And then as far as where to go from there, do you mean more about what do you do sexually? Like, do you tie him up? No, no, no no no no no no because that no well what i thought but what i thought it would be you know i mean we

we i know i know you know what i mean when you're with somebody you know what's going to have i know how that all will play out but i guess it's going to be because this is the first time that he's doing something like this to like literally you know becoming because he was so cute he was like they about to anything i'll be in the end of the day and i don't know in the end of the day and i don't know what becoming, because he was so cute, he was like, say about do anything, I'll be Indiana Jones, I go, no, Indiana Jones is not going to go with what I'm doing tomorrow night, so no, we're not doing Indiana Jones, but I love his enthusiasm to want to do whatever. So if I love him, you know, I don't even know, like, I know, it's really cute. So I was thinking maybe I would just, you know, have him, because I bought a blind fold, and I, well, maybe I'll make him sit in the chair while I'm getting ready so that when I come out, yeah, I

can kind of be, you know, kind of walking around the chair a little bit and then, you know, and then take the blind fold off and then boom, I'm going to look like I look and then he's going to be probably going crazy. But I'm going to need to, you know, kind of control. Yes. You know, I just, I don't, I just, oh my gosh, I just feel like, I love it. You do it right? I just don't.

You got it, so you go out and you're like, hey, so I don't even know what about that back girl's real thing. She's like, I'm a back girl. This is what I'm doing. I've been looking at you for a while. I'm glad you got tickets. So this is your special night to treat you.

And walk around, put your favorite music on, and just be like, this is my favorite song. What about some fantasy that you've been seeing him and like you've been looking at him in his seats for a while and you always thought he was attractive and, you know, something like that? Yeah, okay, no, that's great.

No, I like that. Okay, because I wasn't going that far with it. Yeah, I told you. This is what you do so then you'll have something to fall back on. You're like the Flirty Batgirl. I got that. Thank you. Okay, you got it. Does that feel better? Think of her name too. I got it. I got it. I got it. No better issues. What does she like to eat? You know, all right? Give her a name. I got it. Okay. Okay. Okay. Well, you have a stone ghost. I'll eat her. You got to call us and let us know our best. Okay, thanks, Marie. Okay, perfect.

I love that call. I love a good roleplay call. Our last one was from Chicago too. Remember, bye. Bye. Marie, 48, and Chicago has a follow-up on her roleplay experience. Oh, Marie!

We're so excited. Oh my God, Marie, tell us everything. Oh my gosh, girls, I just am calling back because I want to really encourage people to do this. Because I am telling you that I went into this, I was a total nervous wreck. I had no idea if I could pull this off, but taking your advice, getting into a character, kind of having a little backstory to her. So the long and short is this. I did the whole theme based around the Cubs because he's a Cubs ticket season holder.

So when we got to the hotel that night, I told them I need 10 minutes to get ready. I said, while you're waiting, I said, when I'm ready, I'm going to tell you to put the blindfold on, and then you're going to listen to what I asked you to do, and we're going to go from there. So I come out, I've got this adorable light from head to toe, I've toe, hooker heels, stockings, cut little, blingy little shirt thing and matching panties. I got a ponytail extension so I could do my hair a little different. I had the baseball cap the whole thing. I come out, he's in the blindfold.

I said I just need you to change your name, babe. Give me another name. He gives me the name. I take the blindfold off. I introduce myself. I give him my name. I tell him, you know, I understand that you are one of the MVP ticket holders. And I am here to serve you as one of our MVP fans. And I just wanted to let you know that I'm here for your pleasure this evening. I know we might be short on time, the game is going

to be starting soon, but while we have this time together, let's make them. I mean, it didn't even have to even go that far. It was so much fun and here's a follow-up. That was Wednesday night, okay, and it was just an amazing, fun night. And today, out of the blue, he sends me the cutest text, blowing up my phone with all these emojis. Oh my God, dude. I'm at work. All I'm hearing on the TV is how it's the season of Openers coming out. And they're all talk about, you know, Spring's the Train Camp, blah, blah, blah.

And now, all I can think of every time I look at the Cubs MTV is you and how sexy you were, and he's like, I cannot get you out of my mind with this. I'm like, I need you to. It's a total home run. That is a home run. And you're talking about me out of the back. It is. It was a total of a run. And I just want to encourage everybody to just totally have fun with this, because everybody

should be having good sex, and everybody should want to have fun. Yeah, like makes it happen again. Yes, I love this, and then did you know what to do, and then did you guys, like, then you had sex? He came out. I was, that was the question. Oh my god. Are you crazy? We had sex sex we had sex for like the next eight hours it was so incredibly hot it was like now of course you know eventually we got out of the character mode but like

while we were getting going I mean we stayed in our roles and we like you're well, Mr. I have to see your ticket. They might not let you. I mean, that is amazing as the backer. Oh my god. We love you. You made my friggin' night. My weekend. I love you girl. Good job. Okay, we have John who's 38 in Washington Township. And he says that his wife's ex-husband was really large and he feels intimidated by matching it. Hey John, great question. I'm here for you. Thanks for calling. Hi Emily. Hi. It's so nice to talk to you. I just recently found your station and I love your conversations. It's really very enlightening to hear a lot of your comments and your help that you give the others. It's so nice. Oliver, as I was saying, um, I recently married, I've been dating my my new wife for we were

dating about three years and been married now for two years. Her husband was quite large. He was like, can it is very fat, you know, very sick, right? Whatever you want to call it. A lot of girth, but i just feel so intimidated and i just feel like like she's lying in the when she's all you feel perfect and this is so right and i wonder if she really getting satisfied or if a woman has something that's big all the time dot and i'm not hitting that that magic spot anymore because that's what she

was used to and i'm intimidated really and intimid am intimidated and I am extremely sexual. I love pleasing her. You know, right? Okay, John, here's the thing. You guys have been together. No, I totally, no, I totally got it. And I'm like, bum, she told you this, right? Because then now you got to be thinking about this big penis. And you're like, mine's not measuring up. But my first question is, John, have you talked to her about your sex life? Like, if you guys talked about what really turns her on and like, does she seem like she's having a good time? Like, is there anything that's led you besides your thoughts? Befied your mind telling you otherwise. Have there been any other signs that maybe she's really not having a good time with you in the bedroom. No, no, never.

We are very, very open verbally. I am very open to anything that she wants to do. I always try to do something new and keep it fresh in the bedroom. She actually, she told me, I didn't believe her because she's, you know we we've been together for a while and I think she's truthful with me she told me she has never had an orgasm uh... vaginally you know of course you know clinical literal stimulation through oral sex she orgasms very easy she never has had an orgasm through penetration except with me she said

you were the first one that okay John not a problem here. I wish I could high five you here at the phone. John not a problem here. So you as a man in society are obviously like you just need one mention of big penis and that's all you can be thinking about for five years and I get it. It's like that thing you're like there's a bigger penis. First of all bigger is not always better. I can tell you I didn't have my great orgasms. I've been with big penises, all the kinds of penises, and I'm telling you that it was not like

the biggest penis in the world where I had orgasms. And I can tell you that's true for so many women. But what I can tell you is that your wife is giving you such good information right now that she's never had an or, and I don't think she's lying about this We don't lie about that. She's never had an orgasm during intercourse and now she is with you She's telling you that it feels right. Well no one does all the time very different guess what no one does all the time

Okay, some women do all the time most do not But you guys have just got married well It used to be years will keep learning but that's not all about orgasms for women. It's also not all about penicides for women at all. It's more about penicides for men than it is for women. Because men are all like, oh my god, I'm a big enough. Yeah? Can I ask you one more question in that thing category there?

Do any of these enlargement, items, enlargement pills, do they actually work? Is there any way to really appreciate your fantasies? There's not. There's no way to increase your penis size at all. You're peen and you know what John? I wouldn't even let you. John, you're fine. You have to, here's what I think. This is your wife for life. At least you know, right? Love this woman. You guys are great. Have a great sex. She's having vaginal orgasms for the first time. You got to talk to her about this because I think

it's going to make you feel better. And just be like babe, I gotta tell you, I know our sex that are baby. Our sex life is amazing. What have you prefer? It's so great. I love you, I love you. I can't have you.

That one time you tell me about the guy with the ex with the big penis, sometimes I think about that. And I just want to make sure that I am doing everything I can to keep increasing pleasure. And like let's do a sexual bucket list there. Let's have a plan in 2019 for amazing sex and just kind of like nodding like a needy like with his penis bigger But John you don't sound like you would do it that way Just more casual because it feels like I don't know why you still think this because everything is pointing towards you guys

Are having some great pleasurable sex, but it's your mind and I'll bet you probably do this in other areas It might make you successful at work to think about all the other things happening in the environment that you could improve upon, but in your sex life, right, like at work, you're like someone got a bigger deal or how am I gonna be the best in my job? I don't know, is that resonating for you?

It makes a lot of sense what you're saying. I, it's just, it's me, it's not a me. Especially if she like goes down on me, I'm thinking, oh my God, she's holding me and holding me and probably going okay looks like a real penis is smaller. You know, honey she made you. That's the last thing. No no no no she she made her. She walked down the aisle with your penis. Like there were no surprises. She saw beforehand. She's wearing your ring. She's not going down and you every time going, damn, I wish this was bigger. Literally, I'm sitting here with six women and we're all like,

oh my god, have you guys ever with someone that you love. She's committed to you. She's not thinking that you're thinking that total projection here, John. I just sit now. If a woman had a big one, does she always need a big one to be satisfied? No. I mean, and know if a woman had a big one that she always need a big one to be satisfied. No, I mean, and those women, I'm trying to think about a woman who'd be committed to someone being like, there's other problems in their relationship. I'll tell you that. If she's just some woman who's like, and they're not going to get you out, there are women who are size queens. That is not your wife, because she wouldn't have married you. For sure, there's women who are dating around and they love, need a a huge penis and they need all that

That's for sure. Just like men want really super large breasts. I'm not with those guys those guys are with Jamie What I'm saying is that's just how it goes. So so you know what I'm saying? Dude John, it's the same thing. So this is all in your head Which doesn't make it easier, but whatever you can do to like replace these thoughts next time time she's going down on you, you can just start thinking about how great her lips feel. Alright guys, I love you all. Thank you so much for listening. What a fun show. Thanks to my amazing team, Ken Samantha, Julia, Michelle, producer Jamie and Michael.

Was it good for you? E-mail me. Feedback at sexwithemily.com. .com.