Sex With Emily - Behind The Porn Curtain w/ Jacky St. James & Ana Foxxx

Episode Date: February 4, 2025

Ever wonder what happens behind the scenes of your favorite porn? Today I’m joined by adult film director Jacky St. James and performer Ana Foxxx. We discuss their hottest scenes, what it’s like being on set, what constitutes ‘ethical porn’ and whether porn actors fake their orgasms. Plus, Jacky walks me through her approach to creating an adult film and how porn industry has evolved over time. Ana shares what it’s like dating as a porn star, details from her dirty 30 birthday party and how porn has shaped her sex life on and off-screen. We also answer your questions like: is porn scripted or spontaneous and is it normal to get jealous when your partner watches porn? In this episode, you’ll learn: What really happens on a porn set, from fake orgasms to real chemistry. How porn shapes real-life sex and what actually feels good. Why ethical porn hits different with real pleasure, real connection, and no male gaze. Show Notes: More Jacky St. James: Website | Instagram | Twitter (X) More Ana Foxxx: OnlyFans | Instagram | Twitter (X) Buy Smart Sex New Paperback Cover Now! Join the SmartSX Membership: Access exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, community building, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse. Yes! No! Maybe? List & Other Sex With Emily Guides: Explore pleasure, deepen connections, and enhance intimacy using these Sex With Emily downloadable guides.  SHOP WITH EMILY! (free shipping on orders over $99) The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure Want more? Visit the Sex With Emily Website  Let’s get social: Instagram | X | Facebook | TikTok | Threads | YouTube Let’s text: Sign up here Want me to slide into your email inbox? Sign Up Here for sex tips on the regular. See the full show notes at sexwithemily.com

Well, I'm curious, Ana, what have you learned about your own pleasure, your own pleasure doing porn the last decade? I found a lot more places that I didn't know I liked to be touched. I thought sex was just straightforward and missionary and maybe doggy, so I've learned a lot more positions. I do anal. Guys and girls, I'm a lot more fluid than I thought I was before, which is pretty awesome.

You're listening to Sex with Emily. I'm Dr. Emily and I'm here to help you prioritize your pleasure and liberate the conversation around sex. All right, you ever wonder what happens behind the scenes of your favorite porn? Well, today I'm joined by adult film director, Jackie St. James and performer, Anna Fox. We discussed their hottest scenes,

what it's actually like being on a porn set, what actually constitutes ethical porn, and whether porn actors fake their orgasms. Plus, Jackie walks me through her approach to creating an adult film and how the porn industry has changed over time. Anna talks about what it's like dating as a porn star, details from her dirty 30 birthday party,

that's a scene she'll never forget, and how porn has shaped her sex life on and off screen. We also get into your questions like, is porn scripted or spontaneous? And is it normal to get jealous when your partner watches porn? So I just wanna make clear two things that we talk about in this episode, ethical porn.

So ethical porn is porn that respects the rights of performers, has good working conditions, shows both fantasy and real world sex, and celebrates sexual diversity. And they often say it's porn for women, by women, but I don't want to limit it to that because I know all genders, I know penises who love out the cold porn because it's just more realistic. You know, you're going to see things in there that actually feel like real sex. But the closest thing we can get to authentic.

Now I also wanted to find tube sites. So tube sites, if you've seen porn, that's probably what you've seen as one of the tube sites. That's just the basic free porn sites where anyone can upload clips. Sometimes people are throwing up videos they took from other sites and this is porn that's made by men for men and it's with the male gaze in mind. What men find sexier, what penises find sexy. So I just wanted to define that for you as we move into the episode. Please rate and review Sex with Emily wherever you listen to the podcast. It just helps get the podcast out to more people like you. You can find us on all social media. It is at Sex with Emily. Be sure to check

out my new article, Valentine's Day Gift Guide, The Ultimate Pleasure Journey on our website, SexWithEmily.com. I want to let you know that the paperback of my book Smart Sex is now out in bookstores in the US and if you live in the UK my book was just released January 30th. More places coming soon but check out Smart Sex if you're a paperback person check out the paperback you're gonna love it it's been an incredible journey with book and now the paperback is so exciting. Also wanted to mention my membership community, Smart SX, that we launched in September and it's just been an incredible community of people coming together to share, to grow, to support each other, to have accountability in our desires to have

better sex. I bring in some of the leading experts in the world to teach, you know, a few times a month. It's just a wonderful community. We're exploring and learning so much about ourselves and you can learn about your sexual health and just join us there. All right everyone, enjoy this episode. Let's talk skincare because honestly,

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You just pump it and you go, I love the bottles, I love all of it. So if you wanna kick aging cells to the curb, go to oneskin.co and use code EMILY for 15% off. That's O-N-E-S-K-I-N.co and use code EMILY for 15% off. That's O-N-E-S-K-I-N.CO and use code EMILY. And when they ask where you heard it, tell them sex with Emily sent you. Here's a shocking truth about New Year's resolutions.

Whether you wanna lose weight, improve your energy, or beat that embarrassing post meal bloat, nothing works if your gut isn't healthy first. That's why I'm starting 2025 with Just Thrive Probiotic. And to be honest, that's how I started 2024. One of the things that I really adopted last year was taking a daily probiotic from Just Thrive. See, most probiotics die in your harsh stomach acid

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They don't ask you any questions. So if you're ready to transform your health in 2025, visit JustThriveHealth.com and use code SEXWITHEMILY for 20% off your first 90 day bottle. That's like getting a month for free. That's JustThriveHealth.com promo code SEXWITHEMILY. Here's to your best health with Just Thrive. ["Sex with Emily"] Jackie San James is an award-winning writer, director, and producer of ethical erotic content.

She's a huge proponent of positive sexuality. Her work aims to explore, embrace, and normalize the very varied path of female desires. Anna Fox, XXX, is an American porn star and she has performed in over 200 movies. Anna Fox has several recognized performance you can see her at, Belessa. I'm excited because you came highly recommended as a fabulous duo that work very well together because I thought how great to have a director on

and a porn star to kind of talk about what it's like working together, the state of porn today. And so maybe you could just start with, everyone always wants to know and and I want to know, how did you both get into the industry? Anna. I had a boyfriend and we would hump very often and very terribly often.

So I really wanted him to be better. And it just so happened my cousin was a club promoter and they were promoting porn parties. One weekend that I went, I just didn't even know porn people still existed. I thought that they were just in hustlers on the back of my dad's toilet. So it was like, oh, they exist and they're here and in front of me. They gave me a card to join porn and I was like, I'm going to give it to my boyfriend

because he needs to learn how to like give me those like storybook orgasms. And he didn't join porn. So yeah, I decided to take the dare instead. And then so you, that's how you got into acting and porn? Yeah, I really wanted to learn how to have better orgasm. So when it came across, I was like, oh, nobody's ever gonna wanna watch me do porn, but at least I'll learn how to give like a BJ, you know?

Right. Jackie St. James, I've heard of you for years. You're a legend in this industry. Tell me how you got into this, right. Jackie St. James. I've heard of you for years. You're legend in this industry. Tell me how you got into this Jackie. Thank you. I worked in corporate America and basically watched a lot of porn. I watched porn from the time I was 18 when you had to go back behind the curtain at the video store. But when it got on tube sites my guy friends would send me links. We'd always laugh like, oh that's a crazy scene or whatever. And one of my guy friends sent

me a link to a clip that was for a studio that was doing romance porn. And it was scripted. And the people were attractive, the guys were attractive. And I was like, what is this studio? So when I Googled it, I found out a little bit about them and they were doing a screenwriting contest for their studio. And I entered the contest and won and then went out to win AVM for best screenplay that year. It was like a whirlwind. That's amazing.

You entered the contest, you won, and now you've been doing it for 10 years. And Anna, how has it impacted your sex life, your sexuality, being, or acting in porn? I definitely am very thankful for porn because my sex life definitely would have sucked a lot, like in bad ways. I feel like I have magic powers now that I've been in porn

and like experienced so many different people in different situations. Like it made me step outside of what I thought was hot. You know, now I'm in more scenarios and situations that I never would have tried before. So I feel like a very well-rounded oralist. A well-rounded oralist. Yeah.

Well, I'm curious, Anna, what have you learned about your own pleasure, your own pleasure doing porn the last decade? I found a lot more places that I didn't know I liked to be touched. I thought sex was just straightforward and missionary and Maybe doggy so I've learned a lot more positions. I do anal Guys and girls, I'm a lot more fluid than I thought I was before okay, which is pretty pretty awesome Well what we want to talk about today to one of the things is porn that's made for women by women

are just ethical porn. There's so much challenge in the industry because people like porn, but in heterosexual relationships, they're like my partner watches, like if it's a woman, she's like, but I don't feel great about what I'm seeing. And I'm like, well, you should check out porn

that's more, you know, I've talked about like Erica Lust or Bolesa. And now I'm happy to see that there are more places right now doing it, but Jackie, I know you've been doing this a long time and we grew up in the same way that we didn't have porn to watch really. And so I feel like when I was learning to have sex,

I was just sort of feeling my way through it. And then I wonder when you're working with younger women now in their twenties, even in their thirties, like are they kind of like mimicking, oh, making the moans and like throwing their like things, you're like, does that actually feel good to you? So in a way you're sort of part sex therapist, part director, what's been your experience?

Oh yeah, I mean, I find that anyone in younger generations, I mean the gen Xers I think get it because they had to feel their way through sex. But deal with younger women especially that are taught that like gagging and dry heaving on a penis is how you give a blowjob or making a sound even before a hand has touched them. It's really about like reeducating and trying to unteach because when you grow up on porn and bad porn, that's kind of what people think is how you have sex.

And for me, I mean, just looking at the women, you know when a woman is having sincere pleasure and when they're faking it. And like a lot of times the younger performers, they're clearly faking it. And I just wonder if they've ever even experienced an orgasm. Have they? I mean, so have you found that maybe they haven't?

Like, do you ever have to be like, okay, cut, you know, we need to go back in this and we gotta talk. And a lot of times I do, but sometimes you can't fully unteach somebody what is so fundamentally part of their sexual, I guess, experience. And so if they grew up only watching hardcore porn, it's very hard for them to understand that like, open, it doesn't have to be what you saw. I mean, maybe you do enjoy giving us a couple little blowjob and that's fine, but that doesn't mean that that's what every man wants. And so it's sort of trying to open women up and

really getting to them to understand that an orgasm isn't just this flailing thing. And I always noticed when the guy is doing something and she's like, oh yeah, I'm about to come. And then he completely switches up what he's doing and she still manages to have an orgasm. I'm like, clearly you didn't come. Right, exactly. You better change it up, dude. Do not move. When we say don't stop, we mean don't stop and don't change.

We mean like, do not move, do not do anything. Don't go faster, don't go slower, do the same thing. Right, right Anna? I agree. So tell me, how long have you been doing this? I believe I'm on my decade. I believe I'm on 10 years. I believe I'm on 10 years. Oh, you're both. Okay. Most porn that people see these days, we talk about porn being so ubiquitous

since we all got phones in our hand about the last decade, it's mostly the tube sites and it's made by men for men. I would say in the most part. And so when people think of porn, they think of this free porn they go to, people that don't even look real. And that's why there's so much like vulva shaming. And I'm always saying to them like, no, she's cheating towards camera. They tug label as in there's makeup on it. And the amazing thing that I saw when I saw something that you directed, Jackie recently,

and I was talking about this at the office today, that she had like razor burn. Like she, like it was so real, but still hot. But like she, you weren't trying to cover that up because that's fucking real life You're like goddamn having sex and I shaved and I've got these bumps So yeah, is that mostly the kind of porn that you're doing these days Jackie for me? there's this their bless up plus series is what I'm mainly working under and Everything is is natural a lot of times. I'll just get to set and we'll talk about

You know what they're in the mood to do, and I let them have at it. And it's not about opening up because, in all honesty, and I mean, Anna can speak to this, too. When they're opening up for camera, it's just not gonna feel the same way it would if they were just at home having sex with their partner. And we want to see the connection less than the penetration because the connection

and the hotness between the two performers is so much hotter than just seeing a penis and a vagina go at it. It's just that's so uninteresting and it's been done so many times that why not provide something different? Right, exactly. And so I always think it's like it has context, it has a plot. Do you actually know why they're having sex? Maybe there's some tension built up. And so Jackie, that starts with you though. You're coming up with these stories. How do you come up with the content?

I mean, for me, it always starts with the relationship. So I just pick like two characters and I'm like, what is their scenario? Is it, you know, two people have always wanted to have sex or maybe they've had sex and now they've broken up and want to get back together. I mean, there's so many, I mean, there's a limitless possibilities of what can be hot and sexy. So with the scripts and stuff, I just pull from a relationship and I build a story around it. And it's so authentic, because it's whatever the person is feeling in that moment. And nobody ever

has sex the same way twice. Right. No one porn and traditional porn, they always do. But like, we don't, we have sex, whatever we're feeling that moment. So yeah. Okay. Anna, what about you? So you got a lot to say there, Anna. So tell me about some of the some of the hot scenes that you've done that you've worked on together. By far my favorite scene for Jackie was with Mr. Castle. Tell me everything. By far. I think everybody knew. I think everybody knew that day that we were gonna like come clashing together like magnets. Like I fucking love Johnny and like Jackie did everything she did to give me the person

that I wanted. So for me the story didn't even matter. I was just really happy. Really happy to hump Johnny for Jackie. Okay. But the story was really good. The story built a lot of tension and a lot of flirting, which was really fun for me to not right away attack Johnny like I wanted to. So to sit there and do dialogue with him all day and ran at him and pretend like I didn't

want to hump him. It was so cute. Walk me through a day. Like you get to this. Like how do you get ready for a day on the set? Like do you have to do it all? I do all the things. I'm such a moisturizing like goddess.

I have like a tower of moisture. So Johnny got a special bath bomb for the morning time. And I sat there and I thought about his cuteness. And then when I finally got to set, I just was like really excited waiting for him, you know? And then like, it's fun like giggling around the corner with Jackie and be like, oh my God, he's coming. He's so hot.

It's just like- I love that it still gets that way. That's good. Yeah, it's like such a girly, like exciting day. So, you know, my cheeks cheeks hurt and then like when he finally arrives everybody's just like shocked at how handsome he is so it makes me feel better I'm like yes I'm doing good I'm getting good dick from a handsome goddess so it's just like a fairy tale day everything went so smooth I love the

crew I love Johnny I love Jackie everything was perfect. What was the hottest? Can you walk me through a scene, like the hottest scene with him? Like, I've had so much sex with Johnny, and I've never seen such a giant puddle of sweat on the floor after. Like, it looked like someone took a giant bucket and just dumped it on the floor. And I was like, wow, we were really fucking.

Yeah. And it wasn't until I saw the scene after that I realized how hot it was. Cause I was like, I was in La La Land, I was not paying attention, but I saw the scene and it was so hot. Like the angles, there was this like angle where I'm like giving him a blowjob

and he's like finger banging me and the perspective was really cool. And I was like, oh my God, the crew knew what they were doing. Well, I have a question. When you say you were so in the moment and you were in La La Land, so do you actually lose yourself? Oh yeah especially like when it's a good day when I really want to work with the

talent like the only time I feel like I'm on camera is when we're doing dialogue. You know once like we kiss and there's no cut I'm like completely forgot that they are there until we're done and I'm like oh yeah. Oh yeah I'm on a porn. That's to me would be ideal. Exactly, like it's the best day. Yeah, that is, so most porn we're watching, it really is scripted, like, okay, you know,

time to move from doggy to choking on his penis, okay. But with this one, it's not happening. You're saying it's more like you just, chemistry and where it goes, like real sex. You know, I don't plan it out. I don't text my partner and I'm not like, I'm gonna give you a blow job at 802 and then at 816, you're gonna go down to me till 915,

although sometimes I do say that, but. Right, so you've really just go into the moment of what is, what feels good. Yeah, the only time that it's ever, I mean, I don't wanna say scripted, is like if what we were talking about, if it was somebody that's younger, that's like immediately like, you know, gagging on the penis and just really going extreme and screaming, you know, obscenities or whatever.

I don't really like to interfere because I want them to have organic sex. And like Anna was saying where she doesn't even know we're there until it's over. And that's why it's critical for us. Like I don't like to cut unless it's like an absolute emergency Because the second that we start putting our crew stuff on their sex scene, it feels produced So we try and just do nothing like we communicate through headsets Like I do with the crew and be like, oh get this angle. Look at this We try to not have the talent here, us communicating

because we want them to have fun and enjoy it. Okay. So tell me about that, Anna, how do you say you're in the moment, you're with someone, you're attracted to them, this guy, or most of them, would you say you are? I mean, we just talked about one of your best experiences, but how do you turn it on for someone if you maybe aren't that into them? For the most part, I go to work to have a good time. So whenever I'm given a person, if I have a connection with them or not, I just want to try them out and make them react to me. So I just kind of feel like they're going to be excited to work with me.

So I like moisturize myself and like, I got all the nice scents and stuff. And if they're not excited just from like sniffing me then you know I don't know but you know I try to make a little like fun ambiance so that way like there's an attraction no matter what's going on like if they can't if I don't know like if I'm smothering their face they can smell me I smell good you know if they're looking at my butt my butt's nice so you know there's there's lots of things to play with and explore and and it usually goes well. I know there's been a lot of talk about how this is real. There's real orgasms on the set. Oh, yeah.

Always majority time? I try to have orgasms as much as I can, but sometimes I don't get there. And I'm not necessarily sad if I don't have an orgasm, but I'm kind of like, oh, you know, we only have so much time in the scene. So it's a lot easier on sets like Jackie's versus somewhere else. I got it. But for Jackie, you just chuck your head. You said

they don't always have orgasms, but do they then do they fake them or there's just no orgasm in the scene? I mean, so again, it comes back to this, you know, and even in like interviews with performers, you'll see a lot of them be like, oh yeah, I come all the time. That's a lie. And they're saying it, you know, he's their fans,. Right. The fan wants to believe that these girls, their breasts can be touched and they're having an orgasm, but that's just not realistic. Right. So for me, I always tell them, don't fake it, don't fake orgasms. But at the end of the day, I can't control if they choose to fake it. And there's other reasons why people might want to fake it. Like maybe they're trying

to encourage the male talent because he's struggling and there's a lot of things that are at play. But no, I mean a lot of times I tell the performers, I just say if you aren't going to come, it doesn't matter. It can still be hot without an orgasm and you can still really enjoy sex. So I haven't really seen to my knowledge fake orgasms on Valesa. That doesn't mean it hasn't happened, but I don't. Because you can tell. Oh yeah. They're good. They're good orgasms.

I'm sure. If somebody comes like six times in a scene, we know they're faking it. Right, right. Cause this is not gonna happen there. So now there's all these trends in porn. So I'm wondering like MILF porn and cuckolding or wife swapping or hot

wife, how do you decide like is there any new porn that you want to do that you haven't been able to do or do you feel like well I still got to do what people like? For me it's the reality stuff. We're doing a series called Blind Aid, it hasn't released yet but it's we set up two people and they have no idea who they're working with. We make sure that they're not on their no list. But again, it's getting back to the authenticity, because having worked for 10 years, I mean, really nothing feels new to me except for real sex.

And that's so sad to say. But I've done faux-cest and the MILF stuff and just all the genres, because porn is about the genres. And so for me, I love doing the reality amateur stuff. It just feels good because you can tell that people are enjoying it. It's not a performance. What about you, Anna? What do you like doing these days? Oh, I have to 100% agree with Jackie. Anytime I'm given a script where I'm a milf or someone stepmom or something weird, I don't relate and I just feel kind of ridiculous.

I'm 100% about the authentic porn right now. I love just going to work and coming because I feel like it, you know, having a good day is always best. So anytime I can do authentic porn, I'm down. So let's talk about what is authentic porn. Let's define it. Real sex, you know, where I don't feel like

I have to compete with other girls that might be in the scene or other people on the site where I'm literally hired just to be me. Like, you know, I'm not a stepmom or an Ebony or the teen or whatever. I'm just a human girl. Fucking another human. Okay.

Would you say that ethical and authentic porn are the same? Cause a lot of people don't know what ethical porn is. I kind of want to rebrand it cause ethical makes people think like porn and ethics. Sometimes there's some people that's going the same sentence. But would you say that's kind of like authentic porn as we're talking?

There's more connection. There will always be a connection. There's no fake orgasms. I mean, again, this is the same thing where it's like, we're not forcing people to behave a certain way. We're asking them to behave how they feel in the moment, which is seldom asked in any other studio. Feel what you're feeling.

No, it's a performance for the audience and the audience's enjoyment will come from seeing their enjoyment. So, Anna talked about this with Johnny Castle. I always will ask people who they want to work with and that is not done very often on porn either. So you're just stuck with who you're working with. Whereas I'm actually seeking out somebody that they genuinely have an okay interest in or a very big interest. I mean, sometimes scheduling doesn't work out, but. Yeah.

What do you think, Anna, if you just had to say what comes to your mind? It's less of a performance. It's like one of the first times I feel like I'm having like real sex, like, and not having to like, you know, beatbox on a dick or whatever. Like, you know, I just like selfishly enjoying myself

without thinking about the audience. Right. So from a performer standpoint, it feels very real, really authentic. And I love that. Man, I know when I first saw the pictures of Lesa and like just the pictures of the girls faces, I was like, Oh, I want to, I want to do that. Maybe we're in ecstasy.

So do you guys, but so is it is scripted, but really the only part scripted is the actual I want to do that. Right. Maybe we're in ecstasy. So do you guys, but so is it, it is scripted, but really the only part scripted is the actual scripted part, but the sex is not, like how much about regular porn? Would you say that like the tube sites porn is all scripted, right? Yeah, it's definitely the other sites are scripted. We take pictures of how we're going to have the sex. We map out how we're going to have the sex. We know how long it's going to be.

We know when we're going to change. They'll even call it out like football plays, you know, like they do. Yeah Yeah, it's so so I'm sitting there like getting fucked and like, you know The clock's ticking like I've got two minutes to enjoy this so cuz we're gonna flip in two and then the next thing's for five minutes We're gonna flip flip flip. It's so scripted. Yeah, so scripted you guys are taking your time I think I yeah, I mean I heard you say in an interview Jackie that it's so scripted. Yeah. So scripted. You guys are taking your time. I think I, yeah. I mean, I heard you say in an interview Jackie that it's like 16 hour days.

Yeah, if we're doing features, yeah. For the reality stuff, no, because it's not, you know, the reality stuff isn't scripted. So it's, you're in and out, but I mean, our crew. Literally and figuratively. How do you know when a scene is over then? Well, I do tell them because we try and keep the scenes to about 30 minutes, but you can also, I think the performers naturally feel an end.

It's a we feel it too. So we'll be like, all right, whenever you guys want to wrap it up. But on the amateur stuff, I tell them you end when you feel like it. So it's completely on them to decide when it ends. That's great. I feel that. Anna, you're so happy. It's so smiley.

Yeah. Anna, is there any, I know you probably get asked this a lot. What is your, like, the scene that you did that you were like, I have arrived, or this was the craziest scene that was really a turn on and erotic and amazing, if you had to just break it down, what was going on? Probably my 30th birthday, I had a dirty 30 orgy and it was by far like the craziest like bulls nut thing I ever did.

On film? Yeah. Where is it? Can we find it? I want to join your birthday party. It's online. It's on my OnlyFans and it's on Analyzed. But I got to pick, I wanted to have as many people as I could get without going like crazy Like I didn't want like 50 but

Ten I think I had 13 which is a pretty cool number and I picked six of them so I specifically knew who six were and I didn't know who the rest were and I wanted to be ready for them to just attack me and then then after they all fucked me, like they could fuck each other. And so I dressed up like Cruella De Vil because my birthday is by Halloween. And I came out and they were all butt naked and they all just like attacked me. And it was really cool, like being like a cookie for ants and not knowing whose hand was touching me where and like whose what was what

and I could just like see through like crevices of fingers like people's reaction and they were like whoa and like because there's like at the point that penises start entering me they're like oh my god it's like a Mayweather fight so it's pretty interesting and really fun that is a lot I mean that'd be a lot to drive you directed you directed a scene like that? I've never directed a scene with that many people, no. Well, I guess kind of that one kind of co-directed it, since it was my vision. Yeah, it was your birthday. Yeah.

Jackie, what about you? Is there like a career? You've been doing this a while, like highlight, where you're like, oh, this is what I love. Is there what was going on in the scene? You know, this is a strange thing. And this isn't like a career defining moment. But it was just a moment where I was like, oh, we're doing something different

It was a lesbian scene and it's not like this most epic memorable scene but what I remember and I remember because it's a lot of times I've seen so many people have sex that it's like Sometimes it just same old same old but with this it was two female performers and for 13 minutes, they didn't even take off their shirts. And I remember the male camera guy at the time, who doesn't work for me anymore, was like, tell her to get her tits out. And I'm like, no, like this is, this is exactly what it is. It's just letting two people explore. And it was so fascinating because I didn't even realize how long it had been until the camera guys

started yelling at me to tell them to get their shirts off. But I realized they'd been doing this for 13 minutes, but yet I was totally captivated. I wasn't looking at the time. And they were just making out and like grinding on each other. And I thought, this is different than anything that's being done right now.

And this is fucking cool. That's real. That's what we're talking about. That's ethical and that's authentic. We're gonna take a quick break when we come back. I asked Jackie and Anna our quickie questions. Don't go away. So when was the last time you needed to go to a doctor

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promo code SWE. So don't wait your best hair is just a few months away. So what tell me if you said to say like what is the best part of your jobs? What's the worst part of jobs? Best. What do you love about it? The putting people together part. The good surprises in porn is always really fun. What's a good surprise? When me and Jackie just worked together we put a Lotus with David Lee and they were so we were so cute. We had our own non-sax scene going on. Right. We were excited and they were excited and like the genuine like attraction and the adorable goodness of two people getting together was like oh this is why we do this. What about you, Jackie?

Yeah, I mean, I think it's just really connecting with the performers and see them happy and walk away feeling good. That's my favorite. Okay, what's the least favorite part? payroll. People work. I mean, there's, there's so many laws in foreign like these 2257 laws, which I think started because Tracy Lawrence, I believe that's when it started. So we have so much paperwork and it's, you can't just do one set of paperwork and it applies for it's like every day on set, you have to fill out different paperwork and it's

a lot, it's very tedious. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like that's same in every industry, right? I don't know, in a way, like I hate paper. I hate running payroll. It's a nightmare. What about you, Anna? I don't know in a way like I hate paper. I hate running payroll. Nightmare. What about you, Anna? What about like being in porn?

What part of it is like some days are you ever like, I don't feel like having sex today. But I got to. I know. Yeah, probably probably that part. Like sometimes like I see people grinding every day and I am like aggressively horny, like once a week. That's still good. You know, just yeah, you know, trying to find the drive to like always want to like turn Anna Fox on

is probably like the hardest thing. But then when you get cuties, you just, you make it work. What does turn you on Anna? Like even in your, I guess in your personal life, are you in a relationship? Uh, kind of, I guess. Uh, trying to figure it out. Okay. What's it like dating at a porn star? Like, so I would think that there's a certain expectation that when people date you, that you're gonna be...

Oh, yeah, it's terrible. Um, I prefer dating porn stars over civilians because there's always a point when the understanding is like missed. You know, like we're, we're on two different pages. Like my job is always going to remain my job, but you know, the other party wants you to like stop or change because you know, they're like, no, I really want you to myself and I don't want you doing gang bangs anymore. And I'm like, but I love gang bangs. But they're really fun. So how is it different?

Can you talk to you about what is, so if you're having sex with a civilian, what is the difference? Like if I was watching you at home with your partner. Well, at home sex with civilian versus porn star, cause porn star sex, we kind of like, are like in a jungle gym and just, but sex with a new partner at home,

it's like slower, a lot slower, you know, like take the longest time just like kissing and exploring before any of that other stuff comes out. And it kind of feels like high school, you know, like your first time-ish where it's like taking such a long time to do the foreplay and getting to know each other. So it feels really romantic to me, you know, like, I definitely don't do any of the porn stuff. So I have to let them know like right away, like don't put that shit in my butt. I'm not squirting on the couch. Like we're not going to fuck through the house right here. Right. You know, like it's very slow, very casual until

until there's tequila. But for the most part, it's very calm. That's very real life, right? But the thing that I liked about the porn that I did watch that you've directed and that you've been in is that some of it is slow. You have 30 minutes. There's a buildup. I love that there's a lot more oral sex on a vulva.

You see that way more leading with that. We're not just starting with blow job on a penis. How do you create that tension? Because I think some of us even in relationships can think about like, how do I go home and still want to have sex with my partner after so long? So what are the elements that you've learned Jackie that actually create the sexual tension that we could learn from? For me, I mean, I think it's just connecting through the eyes and I think a lot of performers

are really timid about doing that, like, uh, really looking at the person and not looking around and trying to emote some sort of thing that's all over the room. Like, if you just hone in to the person that you're desiring and you're just staring into their eyes, like, there's so much that builds just in looking at somebody. And it's not done enough in porn

where people just look at each other and stare, and you can feel that palpable, like, ugh, I'm gonna rip your clothes off. But, I mean, every scene is different, because some of the scenes I write, it's literally, it's like a race to the finish line, and we're gonna rip off each other's clothes, but then some of the other scenes are like,

what are we not saying, because we really want to have sex? So it's trying to figure out what every scene, like, how the two people in this scene are going to have sex. And it's going to be different for every scene. So some scenes will be slow, like somebody's first time or whatever it may be, would be a little slower,

but maybe it's two exes that are getting back and rushing until somebody comes home or something. Right, right. Do you find yourself, Jackie, on set that there's something that you're like every single set, these are the same kind of instructions I'm giving. Correcting the eye contact thing. That's a good one. It's so intimate. What else? Crew, I will often get after the male crew because

they like to cut off the guy's head in the shot. Okay. Very traditional porn where it's like, okay, let's dehumanize the guy. He's just like a fucking torso. Women, you know, and I don't like to make blanket statements, but like women do want to see the man and his reaction and how he reacts to a blowjob or how he reacts to what you're wearing, whatever it is, it's sexy to look at a guy and him reacting. So a lot of the male crew, especially if I'm working with new ones, I'm always like stop cutting off his head. Please, please, unless there's no way to get the shot, like the guy's head needs

to be in the shot as well. Just as important. I agree. So what do you have to tell the porn stars though, when you're directing the... I mean like the way they get blow jobs. So the guys, like the way they eat blow jobs with the guys like the way the pussy tell me let's talk about how not to eat pussy and how to eat pussy please I cannot imagine a woman enjoying like flicking tongue or like the really rough fingering and some people may like that everyone's different but like I think the men also know the clit a lot and so it's like the clit the clit is like really important here so it's stuff like the clit is really important here. So it's stuff like that. The aggressive fingering is like,

what are you digging for change in there? Like, what are you doing? Yeah. Yeah, I mean, you don't even need to, at least personally for me, like you don't even need to put your fingers in the eye to me. If you're just rubbing on the clit, it's flushable.

Yep. But like guys don't, again, I think it's easier to do the insertion in the vagina because on camera, it's easier to see that than if they're actually paying attention to the clit, it's easier to do the insertion in the vagina because on camera, it's easier to see that than if they're actually paying attention to the clit, it's harder to see on camera. So what do you think, Anna, what about you with oral? Let's break down oral for a minute.

So what have you found makes, when you're receiving oral, what is ideal for you? Or what have you learned about receiving oral that you really like that maybe we wouldn't have known before? Probably not to receive it from a guy in porn. Just probably, yeah. Unfortunately, like, the most part, guys in porn perform like they perform off camera, on camera, off camera. So they still kind of do the same thing off camera. And they are unfortunately taught to be terrible

pussy eaters. And the civilians they got can beat on that. They like romance the stone, like make out with the pussy. That's like the best, the best. The porn guys, I've had, I've had porn guys that wrote books about how to treat vaginas like that, like are just the worst pussy eaters. And I'm like, what? You're an educator? There's always a guy writing a book about eating. Why? Yeah. Why?

No, we need some women, some vulva owners to write those books. So Jackie, you probably, you go in and direct. You're like, this is not, I mean, do you ever do like, okay, cut. Okay, this is what you do. Here's the clitoral hood it retracts slow do you ever have to do that I mean I practically have to do that even with my lovers I think the reason why I don't I mean there's a few reasons one you

don't want to emasculate somebody but secondly I think it is the responsibility of me to communicate to the performers to communicate to each other. Because again, what Anna is pleased by in oral might not be what I like and vice versa. So I think it's important that performers say, hey, I want you to do this to my vagina. Or, you know, because there are some girls that do want to be penetrated.

I don't. But communicating to your partner and really telling them. And that is something I try and encourage people to do is to communicate what they want because I think everyone in real life needs to be communicating. And they're not making this assumption that there's one way to do everything.

But do you talk about this before the shoot then? Because if we're not scripting the sex, like if I just went in with a guy and there was no, he didn't know what I liked, like, and I find myself in real life correcting because I'm like, no, don't go, don't put your finger in right now, don't go so fast. So in the scenes where you're not directing the sex,

and you don't wanna cut the scene, like Anna, when you're making a porn, can you actually direct them when it's rolling? Because they might not be doing what you want. I find that if I'm not like meshing with my male partner or whoever I'm fucking, I try to non-verbally communicate with them before I say it.

Okay. Just cause that's kind of like my love language. Like I just like to like motion. And if you go with me this way, then I'm like, yeah, you're doing it, you know? So I prefer to like try like motion them to do it. If I have to say it for me, it kind of like throws me off. So I'm just trying to like,

you move your body talking shit in my head. So you're saying you're like, damn it does not eat another porn star that doesn't eat pussy Jesus right right right oh here's another one part about it is that every person who has a vulva is different what they want but there are there any general rules that we should follow that people could follow if they have a special vulva in their life like Like what would you say Jackie or Anna? Don't ignore the clit. I mean, I think universally, you know,

every woman's clit is a huge erogenous zone for them. So it's like, that would be the one thing not to ignore. Let's talk about penises real quick. What is the right and wrong things that we're seeing with oral and a penis? It just feels like a performance. And I understand that, like, visually, a sloppy blowjob is very fascinating to watch,

but at the same time, and you'll hear a lot of guys, especially uncircumcised guys, will complain that they're too rough, because a lot of girls will just go to town, and they don't realize that a circumcised penis is a lot more sensitive and there's a lot of other things at play so I mean I would just say that like gagging is not it's it's gone so porn and it's not universally liked by all men either it's not it's not

universally like that is true so Anna do you have orgasms through penetration? I do. I do. I find it hard to perform with a toy. But I prefer I would like a toy with the with the dick too. That would be fun. Like at home. It's a lot easier. But performing wise, yeah, like the the guys that I don't really need the guy once I have the vibrator. He can support the toy. They complement each other. And also vibrators feel good on penises too.

They do. But it takes a special penis to like want to like work with the vibrator and the girl and like know that like you have to close up and be in different positions. Like most performer men want to be like the of giving the orgasm, not the toy. Like Jackie said, they'll definitely want to throw it away. Okay, you're good. You're done. Well, I want to ask you, is we got some questions.

We put this on our Instagram and people want to know, is it normal to get jealous when my partner watches porn, even if he communicates with me? So I get that from women all the time. People are always getting jealous. They think it's like a threat. Is it normal to get jealous when my partner watches porn, even if he communicates with me? So I get that from women all the time. People are always getting jealous. They think it's like a threat. They think it's taking...

Why? I don't understand. I don't understand either. It's a form of entertainment. And you know, if that, you know, whoever is not the one watching the porn, I'm sure they're masturbating to something. Would they want her to get jealous of whatever it is they're masturbating to, whether it be the love interest in a book or whatever it is.

The person at Starbucks who gave them their coffee that morning, like there's just gonna be other things. Anyway, I just think it's about communication and feeling safe and getting rid of shame and all that stuff. Well, here's another one. Someone else said, I feel like guys try to reenact porn with non porn stars.

How can I compare to a porn star? So I think that's probably from a woman. Yeah, they're probably choking or they're doing all these things. And she's like, I don't want it to be like that. You know, you just gotta talk about what you do want. That's the problem is a lot of people don't like porn or don't like what they're seeing.

They actually don't know how to replace it with what they do like, you know? What actually does feel good to me? I know I just learned that through my own like masturbation and figuring it out. I think if they found porn that they liked, because if they're turned off by these, whatever, rougher scenes or whatever it is

that they don't like, they might want to explore something more like Velesa where it's very natural and maybe show it to that person and say, hey dude, this is more my thing, Ben. Ah! You know? Yeah. So do you have any, well first of all,

how can we best support adult filmmakers and stars? Is there any thing we can do? I was gonna say you could follow your favorite porn stars and you know, click their links in their bio, go to your favorite sites like LESA and recommend your favorite porn stars so that way we can fuck for them and fuck for you. Okay.

How has OnlyFans, how has OnlyFans impacted what you guys are doing? What you both are doing? Man, OnlyFans is like, OnlyFans put power in performers hands, which I'm very thankful for. It gave a lot of us the opportunity to start producing stuff for ourselves, which kind of like brings more ethical porn to the table, you know, especially like once you work for an ethical company, you realize what you want to produce and you're like, yeah, this makes sense. So OnlyFans, I think was pretty awesome for performers. Cool. And Jackie, I have to ask you, because I mean, we're not in the same industry,

but I've been talking about sex for 16 years here. Like, I don't know, did you still get inspired every day? Do you have? I do. I mean, there's definitely, when the step genre, it sucks your soul dry. And I mean, I was doing that for years and initially I thought it was great.

And then I, you know, it just drains you. But I think the industry, the one thing about the industry that I've always noticed is that it definitely, it goes through waves and changes all the time. So it's hard to get really bored because something new is always coming in. Yes. Exciting. When new people are always joining the business. So I love my job and I never really feel like I'm in a rut. You have a great job. Because this is great service for people

too. I think that we, we don't know where to go for information and to learn how to have sex. And I love that you guys are creating the kind of work that could really help people and not hurt them, inspire them, putting power of their own pleasure into their own hands. Okay, I have to ask you both the five questions. They're just quick, quickie questions that we ask

all of our guests. They're easy, don't worry. It's not like a pot, it's not scary. Jackie, I'm going to ask you, what's your biggest turn on? Kissing. Anna. I was going to say licking, but I think I meant to say kissing because I was like lips and licking. What is that?

Licking is good too though. Okay. I'm going to add now, Anna, the second question, biggest turn off. Douchery. Jackie. Ignoring the clit. OK, what makes good sex, Jackie? Eye contact. What about you, Anna?

Good sex. Chemistry. OK, Anna, something you would tell your younger self about sex and relationships. I did pretty good, so. It's been pretty, yeah, right. Probably stick to that intuition. It's been a good decade, I love it.

What about you, Jackie? Don't fake your orgasms. What's the number one thing you wish everyone knew about sex, Jackie? That it's different for everyone and there's no one way to have good sex. Depends on who you are and who you're with. Anna?

Probably that sex doesn't have to be fast. That you could take your time and you don't have to always strangle your partner with your penis. Let them breathe. Great. Tell me how people can find you. You can find me on Twitter and Instagram at Jackie St. James it's j a c k y s t j a m e s or all of my work on belessa.co or belessa plus.co. Anna, what about you?

You can follow me on Twitter at AnnaFOXXX or Instagram at Anna underscore fucking underscore Fox. I got it. Thank you so much for being here. I appreciate both of you and thanks for the work you're doing. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. podcast and share this with a friend or partner. You can find me on Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, Twitter, or X and Facebook. It's all at Sex With Emily. Oh, and I've been told I give really good

emails. So sign up on SexWithEmily.com and while you're there, check out my free guides and articles for more ways to prioritize your pleasure. And if you'd like to ask me about your sex life, dating, or relationships, call my hotline 559-TALK-SEX. That's 559-825-5739, or just go to sexwithemily.com slash ask Emily. Was it good for you? Email me, feedback at sexwithemily.com. All right, Valentine's Day is coming, and if you're wondering what to get, don't worry,

I got you. I put together a special Valentine's Day gift guide filled with my top picks for pleasure, connection, and of course unforgettable nights that you can have all year round. Whether you're shopping for a partner, a friend, or yourself because, you know, self-love always in season, these are the absolute best gifts to have. Head to SexWithEmily.com and check it out now or just click the link in the show notes. Happy Valentine's Day!