Sex With Emily - Best Of: Face-Sitting, Fetishes, & Foreplay Foibles with Joanna Angel

Episode Date: August 7, 2018

On this throwback show, we’re starting off Alternative August with a bang. Emily is joined by porn star and director Joanna Angel to talk about anal, oral, and so much more. The two talk about how to get comfortable with face-sitting, ways to get past blowjob lock jaw, what to do when your partner is a lot more vanilla than you are, and all the squirting tips you could ask for. Thank you for supporting our sponsors who help keep the show FREE: We-Vibe, Womanizer, JO, Apex Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey everyone, thanks for listening to Sex with Emily and today's show I'm getting to a smorgasbord of sex and relationship topics to the help of special guest co-hosts in punk, rock, porn, darling, Joe Anna Angel. Thanks for listening. You often ask me about new ways to connect with your partner and keep things super hot. Well, I've got the solution that will add adventure to your sex life in all the right ways. The Jive from Wevibe is the perfect way to experience discreet pleasure that you can wear alone or have a partner control. It's an insertable vibe that allows you to feel pleasure wherever and whenever.

And when you pair it with the Weconnect app on your phone, you can cycle through the GIF's 10 vibration patterns, wear it on your date night or running errands, hey there's no rules. It's also fun to build custom vibes so you experience different sensations or hand control over to your partner and let them surprise you, whether they're across the table or across the country. And because it's from Wevibe, you know this thing is packing the power. To get your jive, visit sexwithemley.com slash Wevibe. That's my site, sexwithemley.com com slash we vibe today. Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got a hair stand. Oh my! The women know about shrinkage.

Isn't it common moment? What do you mean like laundry? It shrinks? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I'm off here. I'm strong. Being bad feels pretty good.

You know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com where you can so easily subscribe to the podcast, ask us a question. Oh my God, there's so much. Easily, right there from the website. Ask, or you can go shopping.

We've got a store. You can follow us on Snapchat, Twitter, Instagram, sex, sex with Emily and Facebook.com slash sex with Emily. And you can also download us now on Google Play, SoundCloud and Spotify in addition to iTunes, which is very exciting. I'm so excited for my guest, my little co-host here. Hi, Joanna. How are you? I'm very excited too. I know. This is great. When you've been on the show as a guest, but I'm just like, just let's do you? Hi, doanna Angel. I'm very excited too. I know. This is great.

When you've been on the show as a guest, I'm just like, just let's do this. Let's do this together. Let's share this. I know. I love it. Well, we're now into September. And September is, for our show right now,

we've declared it like, you know, it's back to school. Right. We're saying that September is back to sexual confidence month. So we're going to that bad. So we're going to be giving ways of all month. We're going to have how people have better sex than all starts with confidence. It really does. I feel like any time people ask me sex advice questions, I just feel like I keep repeating myself. It's like you have to have more confidence. You have to have more confidence. And that's easier said than done. Exactly. You know. So we're going to be giving some tips on month-repauling. And last month as you know, anal sex month.

How was it? Yeah, you missed anal sex month. I missed anal sex. I had a lot of anal sex last month. Oh, you did? I did. I did. I did. Okay, good. I wanna hear all about that.

Cause we did a great podcast called Elevated anal with Dr. Hernandez Chavez. You know Hernandez? I don't know. He was great. It was really funny. He came for the kickoff podcast and he was was running across dude, butt plugs, and they were like, almost fell off the street.

Oh, that's so funny. It was a very funny show. But you had a lot of anal sex, not too like anal sex, that you're a real major. I do. I love anal sex. You do. I really do like to have it. So what is it that you love about it?

It's just this really different sensation. Ever since the first time I had it, I was like, wow, this is so cool. I know, it's kind of like, and I remember the first time I did it, I was like, oh, I didn't even know that was like an option. Exactly, no one tells us. I mean, now people love it. Yeah, I know, no, that was before.

Ainal was like every other word. Ainal's every, literally every other word. Everyinal's every other word. Literally every other word. Every other question is anal. So, and Q orgasms, final. I can, yeah, I can. It's a whole different kind of orgasm. It feels completely different. But I think the strongest orgasms I have are, you know,

when there's like something in my ass and someone's rubbing my clip at the same time, it's like a really no You're crazy. I like transport to a different universe So it's really fun and you know, I don't think Aino sex to something people should have like every single day, you know If that's not what you're used to right. It's kind of like ease into it. Yeah Yeah, what's your best anal sex tips? Like what have you learned over like doing anal sex? And I do think I was blessed, I guess.

Like I've I never had a problem with anal sex. I think some people's bodies are more are more built for the not you know, I know I've directed a million pornos and I remember. Well, not, you know, close to my. Yeah, you know, you want to see your pornos by the way, if you don't know, I'm talking about like, who's Joanne and Angel, which I assume you all know she is, go to burningangel.com because she's a porn entrepreneur. Yeah, I like that.

Yeah, I think I was a great word. I'm a porn entrepreneur. I'm a porn entrepreneur. And so she's got her own site, she makes her own porn, she stars in porn, she's got a lot going on there and she's at Jo Joanne Angel on Instagram and at Joanne Angel on Twitter. So you've directed so many films. Yeah, I directed so many films.

And I remember I used to be a little bit insensitive. And I didn't get it. When girls would be like, oh, I'm so scared to have anal sex with that guy. I'm like, oh, whatever. It's easy. Just put it in. I gave the worst anal sex advice ever, because I just

always had a really easy time with it and And then I realized I'm like, okay, not every girl can just Yeah, but I think more important than Lube is being relaxed, you know like you put a ton of Loub on you, but if you're really tight and really uptight, and you know, and your body is just like, say no. You're anal and tight.

If you're anal and tight, and tight, and tight, then nothing's gonna happen, you know? It's true, breath. We talk a lot about that, so you gotta breathe in. We talk to more nervous. Right. And you're tensing your ass up, your stomach.

Get yourself off, you know? Like, I've told girls just just like masturbate a little bit, just so your body is just kind of like, losing your, you know, more. Right, exactly. More receptive. But I mean, I'm actually like, there's a lot of positions that I can't handle

giant penises when they're in my vagina, which is really weird. There's a lot of people that can't see it. But my ass is like some vacuous, so warm. Don't be so stupid. It goes, that's amazing. You're like, that ass, not my vagina.

You my butt, let's go. I know when I used to perform a lot, you know, when I was younger and more important, I did way more scenes than I do now. I remember there was like a spurt where I did like, I did a scene every day for 20 days or something crazy like that. And I remember on the last five days, this was when I still worked for other people.

I remember on the last few days, I was booked for scenes that weren't anal scenes. And then I remember just being like, can we just, can we just, can we just, I just wanna have anal sex. And the director would be like, but it's not, you know, they give me this awkward look. I'm like, I don't care if you don't pay me for it.

Just, my vagina is sore. And my other girl, yeah, I know. That is so funny. I always really, it was one of those things. I remember reading about anal sex. I mean, do you know Tristan Terran? Yes, of course, yeah. So I remember reading her book, actually.

Once upon a time, a long time ago, I was, when I was in college, I was an intern at nerve.com. Oh, no, of course. It was so crazy. So yeah, and I remember meeting Tristan there, and everyone at nerve was like, yeah, she says, you know, woman.

And yeah, and she wrote a book about anal sex, and I was like, whoa, and I really had never heard anyone just openly talk about anal sex at that point in time. This is a different time. No, I'd say, I know. I was like 15 years ago now. I'd say it was about 12 years ago. Yeah, exactly.

I don't think she started it. Yeah, I think she is. She kind of started it. We're all these like intellectual, especially in New York. I mean, I was living in New York at the time. It was like, I felt like I heard her talk about anal sex and then I just started hearing everyone talk about And then before that no one was

No one I mean when I was not I wasn't even no one was trying I had absolute option. No, I never heard of it That that was a thing. I know I had no it was a different time. I was a How old are you? Yeah, I'm like 19. Yeah, I'm 24 you're 21. Yeah, so yeah, but no it was the whole day. Yeah, I'm like 19. Yeah, I'm 24, you're 21. Yeah. So yeah, but no, it was exactly. It was just like that. So now it's funny because we do get all those questions, but now I would been saying lately,

because I was going to ask you two the trends, because you've been in this business for a long time. It's not right. It's been a while. It went by fast. I feel like it was a new girl in porn now. I do. No, but now you're like the little star porn.

You've your own porn empire, but it's like, I was thinking that when I started, I always said like, anal's the new blow job. Like anal was becoming more normal like a blow job. And now I feel like squirting's the new anal. Like everyone wants to go on squirting. Everyone wants to go on squirting.

Everyone wants to go on squirting, right? That also, right? Don't you think it was more that people saw it important? Yeah, they did. They saw it important. And I mean, I'm really, people are like, how do you squirt? How do you squirt?

I don't squirt very often. Right. You know, and it's, I honestly don't even, I don't have orgasms with it. I don't really love the feeling. Like, it happens sometimes, but I get so, it's hard for me to keep having sex after I squirt because I get kind of sore and tense. Yeah, it's almost like a little painful for me to keep having sex after I squirt because I get kind of sore and tense.

Yeah, it's almost like a little painful for me. It feels like someone like reached inside of you and pulled an orgasm out. Exactly. Instead of it just kind of coming naturally. So everyone who's so obsessed with squirting, I'm like, I don't know. It's a guys, right? Because they think that it's like this other worldly thing they were able to have a long time.

Yeah, I mean a lot of the times it really is pee. You know, it doesn't mean you're peeing on someone. It has elements of pee. I think I heard dark to Jewish. It's true. It's a parlorizo grant. It's a parlorizo grant glances. Yeah.

It's from there, but there is your in mixed in. Right. So it's just something that happens. But can we go back to? But do we have sexual confidence? No, no, I was telling you that because I wanted to kick it off. And the funny thing is, is when you walked in, is you said to me, do you guys get a lot of the same emails?

I'm like, well, we kind of do. They're same genres of emails. And we're starting to take collars and voicemails and stuff. But then we talked about, and you're just funny because you said, well, confidence. Everyone wants to know, how do you build your confidence? And I'm like, I know. And it's really like, it is the most important thing.

Like in your life, like I always say, if you do anything, cultivate confidence, like spend your room. And you know, when people, when you're really on confident, you can see that. They can, but how do you explain it? So, you know, like what would be your, like, yeah, I mean, we'll get to some emails too,

but I'm always like, you know, you just have to work on those demons in your head that are telling you that you're otherwise. And I'm gonna be emails too, but I'm always like, you know, you just have to work on those demons in your head that are telling you that you're otherwise beyond sex, but I think they get interwoven with each other. I really think if I could go back and say I'm like, I wish I would have masturbated more before I had sex. I really do think masturbation makes women in particular way more confident. Right. I I don't I honestly don't know about that With men that's a whole different thing. No, but it's true It's funny to say that because Starting to talk about sexual confidence. We actually did a video

What you wish you learned it's on our Instagram page. It's called It was like a maybe a few weeks ago or a few months ago It was what do you wish that you learned in sex ed? And then a bunch of you will come and you guys can still comment on there And it was like I wish I learned about masturbation like it never even occurred to me to masturbate growing up Like I never even thought to myself and so but once I started to eventually I was like, oh, I get it And so I do tell women all the time and the more you know about your body It makes you feel good, but for the guys the guys feel like they need to have a playbook and they need to know exactly what to do.

But the good news is that every woman's body is different. So, so as long as you're just like listening, paying attention, you know, asking questions not too many, but like just watching what's going on and you're not sewing your head. That'll help you have more confidence, the more women you're with and our partners, men, whatever you'll feel better. But it also starts with, I mean, I hate that. I hate fake it till you make it by way. It's part of loving yourself.

It's part of it. It makes sense. Like, the first time I ever had an orgasm, it was from another person. Now, I never felt that before, and I felt so out of control. Right. You know, and like, then it was like, oh, I really liked that feeling.

If I want to experience that feeling again, that person needs to do that same thing to me again. So then I started acting, you know, kind of like, you got to say, you started acting, but that's it. You know, you don't think you can do it to yourself. No, it didn't even occur to me. It's so weird to think that I was that same, that I'm thinking of myself.

Like I want to like go back in time and be like, what were you thinking, you know, you just see that person again. Yeah, I need to see that person. You know, he's not the only thing they can make that thing happen to you, you know, and it's like, I didn't even start mass reading till a couple of years after I started having sex

and it's like I felt like it just relaxed my entire personality. Right, it you really does change you where you're not like Just this big ball of stress kind of walking around looking for someone else to to teach you Exactly how to enjoy yourself, you know like No, you're sons. No, I'm just like yes. Yes. I mean that's why I always say it's interesting You say that because another one of it, you know very common questions we get asked is you know from women and men Who like have low sex drive low the b-dow or they're not interested in sex and a lot of is because stress and anxiety is One of the biggest killers of our sex drive and so

By masturbating you will feel more release and you will feel less stressed. It does release other aspects of your life. Exactly. And then you'll get more than move for some. Yeah, exactly. It'll be more motivated in other aspects of your life. Right. Everything kind of comes together. It's like exercise.

You need to exercise, you need to master it. You do. And men don't have to convince as much. But for women, if you have it in a while and you're like, just try to start. Take 10 minutes in the shower You know take toy whatever works. Yeah, I use toys. What do you do? I just use my fingers I if I use a toy I use a Hattachi right those are the best fast, right? Yeah, they're the best

Do you have the the cordless one the recharge? Yeah, yeah, I have that one. I have a couple Of course you do you got got a bunch of them. But really, my fingers are great. I probably use, just do that the most. I know it's kind of a bummer because I have so many friends and the work with toy companies. They always want me to be like,

what do you use when you're a master rate? I'm like, nothing. No, I'm sorry. Sorry, that's great. I don't mean to take away business from all the amazing products that are out there. It does do that at all. I mean, if women, I mean, I think the thing is,

I can do it with my hands, but I also just like vibrate. It's just a different kind of work. It is. It feels different. It's different. So it's like, however you get off, it doesn't matter, but just do it. Start to just work that into your team. Because I do with my job, it's like my job to master it.

It is. Because we do get to my best friend. I know I get product sense to me and I'm like, oh God, I try this. And I even find myself that I don't make time. Sometimes, of course, those who can't, I'm teaching it, but then I start to and I go home and I do it and then I'm like, no problem. But it's like exercise.

You don't do it for a while, it's hard to do it and then you do it again and you're like, I want exercise every day. So, or a few times a week. So now I'm like, also, keg exercise is do the same thing for me. When I do my kegels more, I feel like my whole, like your whole public floor, the G-spot, I do my kegels more right I like feel like my whole like

G-spot I'm like I want sex more. Yeah, I think that's you G-spot Or I do yeah, I do it's they're a little more difficult You know, and I can't even like I feel like when I have one I'm like yeah, I got to remember this position so I can do it again I know right since because this magic thing happened. That's what we love to understand. I think it moves. It must move. It's moving.

She's not. Someone else is doing it. You might just stop being the back. I'm like, I don't think it moved. But that's so true. But when you're doing a scene, so you were just like, early on when you did 20 scenes in 20 days. Yeah, or something like that.

Did you, and you're like, I just wanted to do it. And does that mean that you were always having pleasure with the people you're with? Were you having, it was all, yeah, I mean, I, I can, you come easily. Yeah, I guess I come pretty easily. And you enjoy it. Which is sometimes a bad thing in porn. You know, like wait, wait for it. Yeah, yeah, because I get like so tense and stuff, you know.

Can you hold it if you learn to like hold it? Yeah, yeah, I think over time. Yeah, it's like, you know, spiders develop those cauliflower around the ears, and people play guitar and get calluses, and you're like, a giant I'll learn. You're like,

a giant I'll learn. It's like going under water holding your breath, I'm going to hold this orgasm. That's amazing. So now you've learned a ton of exacts, right? Yeah, and you're in a relationship, though. I am, I am a, it's a very happy relationship.

And it took a while to get there, and a lot a relationship. I am, I am a very happy relationship. It took a while to get there. And a lot of it had to do is, you know, just having confidence and loving yourself. I really, I like to talk to other women about this stuff because I was a mess when I was younger, you know, like I was a very, very not confident in... And you're just a kid, right? Yeah, 35, right.

I was so insecure when I was like 18 years old. very not confident. And you're just a killer. Yeah, 35. Right. I was so insecure when I was like 18 years old. Like I didn't even like want to be naked in the shower, you know. Like I would like take my clothes off and put clothes right back on afterwards. It was uncomfortable with my body. Like I was not born with the thing I have now, you know. I had to really change myself and really rush on myself. What was the first steps of that?

That's really interesting. Well, I think, yeah, I don't know. Like, you had the orgasm, right? Yeah, that's a good motivator. Yeah, I know. I mean, really, Master reading helped me and just, I don't know. I wasn't happy and comfortable in my own skin. And I think I just, I knew that was a problem, and I wanted

to change it. I made a conscious effort to change it. A lot of it was reading books and stuff by women that were strong and powerful, and very sexually, like Tristan Taremiro, or Nina Hartley at the time. I would go to lectures and stuff. New York City had a really big scene for stuff like that. So speaking of, I was a nerd, you know, if I had a problem, there was a book that had an answer.

So I was having a sexual problem. That's amazing. I tell people that all the time, I'm like, listen to podcasts, like read books, like, do it. And now it's so easy to, there's so much information going on in my web site. I believe we've answered your question in a blog, opposed to a podcast a podcast or you know, it is

true, but that's, but you're right. It's like find that information, like seek it. Like, and then now you're right. It's not just books. If you learn by listening, you learn by watching videos like. Yeah. It's out there. Yeah.

And I just kind of like acknowledge like, this is a problem. I'm not happy. I need to. You need to change it. I need to change it. And I think also just like like I was starting to feel like pathetic. I would get these relationships with these guys and they would just like totally break my heart and I'd be so devastated. Like so devastated. I couldn't

get out of bed. I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. And I was like, what am I doing? I'm like completely letting men you know to eat my life. Like I'm like not showing up to class because some guy doesn't want to date me.oy of my life. Like, I'm like not showing up to class because some guy doesn't want to date me. Like, that's, like, I just kind of had to snap out of it one day. I'm like, I need to be happy by myself. You know, I need to be happy in my own skin. I need to be wake up in the morning and just like,

I don't know, I just knew something. That is so how no, that is the healthiest. This is what hurts me when I, you know, when women just feel that like, they do. And that's, it's true. And it's like, it women just feel that devastation. They do. And that's true. And it's like, it's just, and usually we feel that devastation. Believe me, we've all gone through that. It's like, because we feel, we're already feeling maybe not

great about ourselves, we don't even realize like the negative things. And then so if a guy is cooperating and saying, I don't want to be with you, you're like, well, see, nobody else is loveable. And it's not even about that person. It's about you. So I always say after a breakup or even before you get into a series of, because I used to be a serial monogamous, I'm like, I just eat time alone.

It's important. You got to that tell your self out. But we're so addicted to that cycle of being in a relationship in the honeymoon phase. It's society's fault. Everything is like geared towards couples. You know what I mean? Like, everything everywhere is like,

makes it seem like you need to have this. Right, but you don't. This thing, you don't need it. But I think you're better suited for one once you figure out your own stuff. And you know what you want. Yeah. Because we get into relationships

a lot of times when we're younger at all age, just because there's an attraction or there's sexy. But if you really know, like, no, I want a guy who treats me well or who has a good job or is great and better open, actually makes me happy. We like do the same things, whatever it is, right? And you got to figure that out. Because then you'll go out and say, oh, he doesn't meet any of these things that I need.

Exactly. And you won't spend six months with them. I think a lot of women forget the whole purpose of sharing a life with someone, whether it's another woman or a man or whatever,, they're supposed to make you happy. You're supposed to make each other happy. I think a lot of women get in this mindset where they're like, I need to show them that I'm this. I need to show them that I'm this.

I need to do this. It's like a job application. Right. And I'm going to provide all this stuff. It's supposed to be a connection. I know. So two people. How would you meet your boyfriend? I needed

to teach the way you only have a pretty company. Right. That's how I runically. I met him during my boyfriend. Yeah, on the phone. I know. It could have been your boyfriend. Damn it. You already got him when he's a good one. But yeah, I ordered t-shirts for him. And then I have talked to him as just a customer for a while. Right. And then I don't know at some point. And then you guys are putting together. Yes, now a while.

I love it. I love it. That's amazing. That's good. Well, you seem good. Your business is booming. I love that. I love that you're here.

This is fun. I know, right? Let's get back to what your viewers or your listeners have to say. Yeah, I want to, yeah, we should please. We need to help them. So let's keep going. Let's get into a little bit of sex in the news and we'll get some emails. Okay.

So, schools and France will use 3D models of the clitoris in sex education classes, which I think is amazing because, I mean, did you have sex education? We're like talking about it. Like, barely. Right. They're like, I don't even remember. Like, here We're talking about barely. Yeah, barely. I don't even remember. Like, here's the big, barely. I barely remember. Like, the uterus.

It was nothing that seemed useful to me. And you might get your period. But there are many useful things people wish they learned during sex ed, like what consent actually looks like. And whether it's healthier shave, your pubic hair than to keep it intact. So exactly. So now French school children will learn about female pleasure with the most pragmatic

guide of all a 3D printed model of the clitoris. And it's so interesting because, so the scientist, Phil Lowe, he has educational sculptures to teach the biology of female pleasure. And he says, women get erections when they're excited, only you can't see them because most of the clitoris is internal. So I want to show men and I want to show that men and women are not fundamentally different. So this is pretty out there. I mean, I love we're singing Europe. There's so much for our open, you know. I mean, this is so, I love it, though, because I didn't even know that like that that it's kind of the, these are like primary

and secondary. So probably like middle school and high school. It's a sexist stigma. It's often keep people from exploring the biology if female pleasure or even female anatomy in general, which is what I wish I learned in sex ed. So an American teacher in Michigan, Ryan Front was fired for saying the word vagina during an art history lecture,

like just like this year. Yep. So, and also this mentality repetuates sexual inequality, of a vagina during an art history lecture. Just like this year, yep. So, and also this mentality repetuates sexual inequality, the fact that straight women have fewer orgasms than their male partners. So they think this guy's like, I'm just gonna teach it without shame. And, but he even says that France has a reputation for being sexually sophisticated,

but often it's about male sexuality. Which is what most things were on male sexuality. So how cool is that? Because I always say, well, it has eight thousand or rentings and it's not male sexuality, which is what most things were about male sexuality. So how cool is that? Because I always say, well, it has 8,000 nerve endings and it's not just your clitoris when we talk about masturbation and pleasure. It's like, it is internal, it does swell. It is like the legs of the clitoris

and there's just so much going on there. We said it's easier sometimes when you have a clitoral orgasm because that it's easier to have a G-spot orgasm or analogue get pleasure. So I love that he's like showing like this is it's not just the little button. Yeah. Makes me happy. That's really amazing. You should be doing that here. I mean yeah people don't know that it's like a penis that like swells and so sex said they're actually teaching. They're gonna pull out to enjoy sex. Yes, that's not just... Yeah, that's not just how to have kids. Yeah, I agree.

But there's like, here's the clippers. We're gonna blow it up for you. I mean, I want to like carry that around wherever I go. I want to get like a blow it up or something. Like, you're like, you can send them my flashlight. Yeah, I'm like, I can't do that. I'm like, I can't do that. I'm like, I can use the flashlight.

I don't know why he spent all this time building. Is it 3D? It's like, is it 3D? It just needs the flashlight. I want your flashlight. Do we have, I want it. I'll bring one. Okay Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days. Three days France, apparently. She's good business too. Right, I love that idea. Okay, so now we're going to get into the emails.

I'm so glad you're here. We're going to help the people. And we're going to give a little shout out to our sponsors, so thanks for supporting them and we'll be right back. Okay, everyone, thanks for listening to the show. Hello, Joanna Angel. Awesome co-host today. So, here we are doing this.

I'm having fun. I know. It doesn't even feel like we're actually working here. Right? That's the business model here. We're just getting coffee. Exactly. We're getting coffee and talking about anal sex.

Now, right now, we're going to talk about sexual fetishes. So thank you for emailing me, first of all all and you know you can email me at feedback at sexwithamily.com but you can also easily ask it right from the website, ask Emily button and now we're taking your voicemails 818 ask SWE1 that's 818 275 7931 we're getting great calls it's really fun you'll hear that. Yeah I'm excited. Okay so here's our first email. Hey Emily, first of all, I think you're absolutely gorgeous, but you knew that. Aw, thank you.

I'm single and dating, mostly online dating, and a lot of women will ask me, usually on a first date, what I'm into sexually, especially whether or not I'm a boob or a buck guy. I have a mild foot fetish, and in most of my previous relationships, I never really had to tell my partner, I just slowly introduce it in the bedroom and they would always be on board with it because by that time we already liked each other. This isn't something I feel comfortable talking about on a first date, and fortunately,

every girl so far thinks it's pretty normal. I wanted to ask if you are on a date with me and asked me that question and I gave a vanilla answer, but then later on in the bedroom I introduced it or mentioned it if you are on a date with me and asked me that question and I gave a vanilla answer, but then later on in the bedroom I introduced it or mentioned it if you would feel that you were lied to. Thanks Emily, you rock Paul age 34 Connecticut. So Paul, to break this down here, he says that he's got a foot finish. So we know that the foot finish, like he requires a foot to be present for him to have an

organism, sexual satisfaction. But with online dating, if people are asking me, I don't him to have an orgasm, sexual satisfaction. But without like dating, if people are asking me, he's like, I don't wanna just bust it out, like when I've never met the person. So he's saying, if we went out of first date and he's like, what are you into? And he didn't answer, but then in the bedroom, he was like, show me your feet.

Like he wants to know like, what's the best process for that, what I think he was lying to. I don't think that you should lead on the first date, necessarily, but what do you think? Because you're more also into the king fetish world than I am. Yeah, I'll, I mean, I'm gonna be honest. But he does something he's dating with.

I mean, dating is a tough thing anyway. It's like you're sitting down with a person and- You never met. Yeah, and you're both kind of thinking, like, are we gonna have sex with each other? And I don't like do I? That's all sex with this person. We're not looking at the menu.

Yeah, we're just like, is this someone I might want to have sex with or not? That's at the end of the day. What you do. Right. Right. Which is awkward enough as it is and then to bring in like a fetish, you know, could make it more awkward. I mean, that really all depends on the person. Exactly. I see. If you just start talking about sex, then bring it up, you know, but I wouldn't be like, hey, like, do you want to order the salmon or the chicken? Oh, by the way, I like feet. Exactly.

I wouldn't just, I wouldn't say that. I wouldn't say that. If you're talking about sex anyway, then bring it up. But I think feet, you shouldn't be embarrassed, you know, Like it's not like, like you'd have to be kind of in a heavy moment with someone, if you're gonna get to that point anyway. Like, like it's not like if you're making out with someone, you're gonna start talking about your foot fetish,

you know, like you'd have to be like. I think it is sometimes better. I don't think that it's something that he necessarily feels that he has to bring up over lunch, or with dinner. Feels like he's ashamed of it or something. Like there's something wrong with him and he needs to get it off his chest. Exactly.

Like I just hung right away. He's like, right, exactly. Which you should tell before you have sex with him. But I feel like if you're with the right, and he says he's had success in the past and nobody freaks out. So I think just like you would in the past, if it comes up and it's like in a clinical way,

like you're at lunch with a date, she's like, so what are you into sexually? I mean, see if she seems like a cool chick, like I think you're going to know what to do. You can say that you like to experiment, explore your open trying new things, you know, your open. But if this is your thing and you need it, like you're like, oh, I'm really into feeling. I can't wait to see your thing, give you a full massage. I mean, that could fit for you.

But if you did, it's suddenly. That she's not even the one that you want to do. Exactly. You could drop it suddenly and be like, oh, you have beautiful feet. I'd love to give you a foot rub later. Exactly. Something like that.

Drop it there. That's a subtle hand. And if she's like, it grows now. I don't like it when people touch my feet. Right. Then you're going to know. Then you might know, like, OK. Because then it's better than no stinger than later.

Exactly. But he doesn't want it. And he says, every girl is just like, yeah, I think he's fine. I think you've got to feel this out. He's overthinking it. You know, just let it come. It'll come actually. You'll know the right time.

You'll know if it's the right person. It'll be a shame. And he was the other thing. I don't tell, I mean, I'm not like, I really want you to, you know, if I'm sitting down with the guy, like, you need to spank me. Like if we even had sex, yeah. I think you're feeling like you're withholding this major thing.

This is something that you're into. Like, it's fine. Like, I don't think that you yeah, I feel like the Fertish, not the wrong that we're all good about yeah, there's something wrong with the person that's grossed out by your Fertish, you know, she doesn't feel like this isn't like the level of like a P fetish, which I mean I don't have a problem with P fetish, but there's gonna be a lot of people that you know that's something you have to ease into Depending on and there's a lot of things actually.

I don't know if you find this. Who does it like for faking drugs? I would like to find data. I should say this. I guess it's Mike. We give me a fun massage every day. Like I'm just so down with your foot fetish. But I think like just so sex, there's people who aren't

into anal. There's women who don't like receiving or giving or all sex and same for men. There's men who don't like. So it's like, there's not a one size fits all sexual menu that we all fit in all the same thing. So you'll find that groove with someone. So I like that you're owning it and you've had success

in the past and you'll continue to have success. So don't trip on it, Paul. We're with you here. We got you back. Yeah. Okay. Dear Emily, my boyfriend and I have been together for three years.

He is 25 and I am 22. We have an active sex life and are very open and communicative in our relationship in both sexual and non-sexual ways. He is very good about listening to and doing the things I like and I do the same for him. I am bisexual and I enjoy being with women, so we have tossed around the idea of having a threesome with another woman. We are both excited and in favor of this idea, but the problem is we don't know where to start. I have been involved in three

films before, but as a third person, and it wasn't planned, my advice, any advice would be fantastic as we're both a little lost on the matter, Elizabeth from Central Valley, California, she's 22. So, and you have three sons, right? In your relationship, you guys are, right. So I thought, what do you, I mean, I always say there's different sites, start meeting like people in your town. Like there's like bookstores, like everything like good vibrations or there's place in line, but that's like,

what do you think? Three sums really are at planned, you know. It's so true. And nobody wants to hear that answer, because they want to plan. I know I'm so sorry. I feel like, right, it's so true. My best three sums are like,

a friend, we're not attached. Everyone's, I've talked about that, but like, I think, but she's gotta do it. It's gotta be, she's got to be, she's got to be a good person. She, well, it's gotta be about her. If, sometimes when couples are looking for it together, it can come off creepy.

If you're not in the right environment. If you're at a swingers party or something like that Then it's totally different. That's kind of like the central valley. I'm trying to think what's there I think I think she's got to just if she says she's into women She's got to turn it on turn it on Turn it out with women you guys could you be at dinner go to bar and I mean this could maybe see if you start talking to a woman Like you can kind of like how have you guys done it? I mean, you probably, we kinda live in a world.

You've got like people living in that world. Okay, so I always say this to our, you're like, they let those show up. My doorstep makes them, they're waiting in the line of your house right now. Yeah, but really, the best threesomes are not planned. And there are definitely girls all the time that tell us, you know, like,

hey, I really want to have a three-some of you guys. And, you know, but the ones that we've had that have been, you know, the most fun have just been like, organic kind of happened, you know. Right, right. But they might not, but Lizbeth might not be having people over her house that are just like, right, that are 20 people. So I'm thinking like, also, like, there are the same. But if she is into women, she's got to turn that on. She's got to go out like she's a single lesbian girl. You know, you're gonna find your girl.

There's got to be clubs. There's got to be lesbian. I think Alex the equation. Let her find a girl. And maybe the girl just wants to fuck her. Maybe the girl wants to fuck both of them. You know, and her boyfriend's got to be okay with the fact that this is,

she's the bisexual one. She's the one with an interest in women. She might find a woman that only wants to be with her and he could just kind of sit and watch or he could hear about it the next day or he could be in the next room or whatever, you know, this is more about her exploring her bisexual side. Exactly. And not shutting it down. I mean there are sites who will talk about like what are the sites like Fettlife and Castle, right? It's like that. What's it? What's it? talk about like, what are the sites like, FetLife and Castle Arts? I like that. What's in the adult friend funder? But you just also, I think that's gonna be more fun.

It's more fun. It's more fun if you meet someone that just a real connection. Yeah, go out and, you know, turn your, turn your radar on. Turn it on, yeah, time to shut down. Wow, I think it's fun because then it's more natural. If you haven't explored that in a long time,

just, right? Yeah, go out and do it. Perfect. Okay. That. That. And have fun in the process. Yeah, have fun, right?

Like, flirting again. But also make sure they have boundaries. Like he might say it or I don't, if you meet someone tonight, I don't want you going home and having sex without, you know what I mean? Without me, because that would be cheating. So just make sure you guys have your boundaries set.

Yeah, no one knows. No one knows, so it's fun. Yeah. And get messy. Exactly. I know what it is. It's fun. It doesn't get messy. Exactly. I don't have any messy threesomes. Yeah. Yeah, I have. Sometimes, sometimes someone's just not on the same page.

Right. Like, what about, right, like they want more or less? Yeah, like they have ulterior motives. Right. They want to be with your boyfriend or they want to be with you more or less. Yeah, like it like like they have ulterior motives, you know, right? They want to they want to be with your boyfriend or they want to be with you more. Yeah. Something like that. What about what about like positions for three sums like stuff that you do to three. Some other like certain people have never had a three. So it's like fast like how does it work? I know. I um I know. I know.

What are the best positions for tips for free sets? You know, I always, keep always asking me. I don't know. I know. It's just gonna clear it out. There's a penis you suck it. There's a giant in the butt. You put things in it.

Yeah, and you definitely can't, you shouldn't have a threesome if it's gonna be like, oh, you were fucking her for three minutes. Now I need three minutes or this or that. A lot of times with me and my boyfriend have three sums. Like, me and my boyfriend have sex all the time. So I like want the two of them to have more sex than me and him.

Why should a third person sit there while me and my boyfriend are having sex? And you don't have the jealousy. No, no, no, not when it's the right girl. So you really did you ever with him at the beginning? No, no, I never did. But it's gotta be about the right other person. There's definitely girls that have made me feel

a little uncomfortable, but he's very like, okay, we're not gonna mess around with her. And I know that a lot of times girls, they don't do that on purpose. You know, there's sometimes just the wrong look or the wrong feeling. And I'm like, are they like jealous or they they're trying to compete maybe? Yeah. Or, you know, sometimes people just aren't on the same page.

You know, I remember we had, we had a good friend. And she's still a good friend of mine. So I'm not even saying anything bad about it. But I think she, she was in it. It's just different. I'm, I don't even think me and my it. But I think she, she was in it. It's just different. I don't even think me and my boyfriend are in an open relationship. And we do have friends that are in open relationships.

And when you're in an open relationship, the two people, they have other boyfriends. They have other girlfriends. It's very complicated. It is very complicated. They start talking about it. I'm like, I don't know how you make this work. More power to you that you do.

But I don't about it. I'm like, I don't know how you make this work. More power to you that you do But I don't understand it, you know, but You know, we're not like that and so I think I think because we're important and because we do have three some some time and we're We're not very rigid. I think she assumed we were in an open relationship to right and like when I like wasn't home She like tried like right making out with him and stuff and then I found out about it, I was so angry and so offended. I know she didn't mean to do it, but she didn't know. So we had to kind of explain everything. And I'm sure to an average person is like, how could that be weird to you when your boyfriend does porn?

Well, it's different. Exactly. No, I get it. I get it. So the boundaries. Now, I know she wanted to have a threesome with it. But after that happened, I was like, okay, I just need like a little bit like, I just need a couple of weeks, you know, like I feel weird right now. And I,

and I, but you have to be honest. You do have to be honest. You don't, there's no way you can determine what's going to be right. Okay. And it's not going to be okay. So it's not like a formula we're giving you for a threesome, but we're saying like, you need this position that, but you're going to know and it is kind of an organic thing giving you for a threesome, but we're saying like you need this position that but you're gonna know and it is kind of an organic thing like my first threesome I didn't know I'd never had one but I'm kind of remember my first one. I thought I've had that. You really am. It's kind of it's it is three and you kind of like just get off of it.

I'm not a different person getting off. Yeah, exactly. You can't be like oh no no you can't be like self. Thinking about right like he's hardly he's with her for three. You're right. You really can't but it is just feel like a dance when, I think it does. It feels like a dance. It just sort of flows when you're not so in your head and you're just paying

attention to what's happening in your body in the moment and all that stuff. So I think that's good. My boyfriend really gets off on me being with other women. So that definitely helps. So we've had it. It is. We've had three Sims before. He's barely involved in his, he's so happy. You know, he's like, I think he likes it more. I know it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it.

I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it.

I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it.

I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. So when you're with a woman in a threesome are you like more dominant? Are you dismissing? I do tend to be pretty um Dominate with women. I don't know why not with men. No not really maybe because you're the one who works here I don't know you're like I don't want to be done anyway over it They're I've getting moods sometimes I want to dominant. I agree. It's a mood thing. Yeah, it's the most part. You know, I just like to be taken for a ride. Right, right. No, it's a lot more work done.

It's fun. You get to find it. People ask me for dominant sex scenes sometimes. So I've shot a couple and I'm always like, man, this is so much work. Right. Being dominant is a lot of it's a men have developed along. They're like, what do I do right? How do I work. Being dominant is a lot of it. It's a lot of it's a men, they're long, they're like,

what do I do right? How do I do it? It is a lot of work. It is a lot of work, you know? But you can pull it off. Okay, our next question is about oral sex, which is a very important topic. One of my favorites.

Okay, hi Emily, I've been with my girlfriend for just over a year and things are going great. I've been with a girlfriend for a year and things are going great. And we also have great sex. Awesome. My Grofen is very sexy to me, but she's a little self-conscious and she's a few pounds over an ideal weight. I really, really love going down in her

and up until very recently, she wouldn't let me perform or all sex in her for very long. One night, she had a few drinks and let me go down in her until she came. And she opened, and now she's opened up to the idea of me going down to her more frequently. I would like to build on this a bit. There are two activities I have some experience in and fantasize about regularly. One is her sitting on my face to the point of orgasm and the other would be orally stimulating

her ass. With her being self-conscious and also just beginning to feel more comfortable receiving oral in general, I wonder what recommendations you might have to broach the subject or to introduce these activities into our rotation. People are so specific. You're like, what? Her face was like, wait, there's two. Thank you very much for your guidance.

I love the podcast, Mike H. 28, Canada. I mean, thank you, Mike. Would it be so difficult to just be like, sit on my face? Right, I'm not so right. Pull her up to your face. Is that horrible advice? No, I mean, honestly,

be making all of this. I feel like if I ever started and I'd be like, sit on my, I would never turn that down. I know, wait. You're not every woman I'm not a woman, but the truth is, is I think you're kind with

a lot of these things you just kind of with confidence like sit on my face and in the moment she might say no but you're gonna you know my other thing would be like you could talk about the things that you both want to try and then bring it up but you're right in the moment just be like sit on my face. Yeah just in the moment when she's already aroused, you know, you just feel like, if you bring it up out, you know, during dinner, whatever it's like, she might overthink it, especially if she's doing.

So like, he's doing on confidence. And so maybe in the moment, she was a little buzz that time, and she had orgasm, because I also want to point out the gaining weight thing. I'm wondering if that's his issue or her issue. Because he did. And he sounds like he brought it up a few times.

And I'm not sure. Like, he just kept saying she had an orgasm, but she just, he said what he wanted to say with you. He said that she's gained weight lately. She's not at her ideal weight. And I think he thought that she was kind of not one, you know, it is when you feel like you gain your pounds, you don't want to have sex.

So I think he felt that she pulled back a little, but then she got a little buzz and had this thing. So I'm not sure that like she needs to feel sexy in her own body because that's how she's going to enjoy sex. But if she's self-conscious, she's never going to be able to like, let go. So I'm not sure again, if she did let go and she said, orgasm with the world sex, I think we're fine. Yeah. You know, make her feel sexy, make her feel like you're into it. And then as far as the ass thing, I mean, you could try it with a finger first. Like if you've never done any ass play, like you could just try like, like, like it, yeah, like going down on her just move down a little bit.

That's true too. When she's on your face, like, I think you could turn around. Yeah. Something. So I would just start, I mean, honestly, I don't eat something. Like you guys are pretty open. You've been together for over a year. She should just flip her over.

Just try it. And you could say I really want to like, like your ass. Or you could do it. Like your ass looks so good right now. But that's why I always say sometimes go slower. Maybe he just wants, if he's never ever touched it, he could just like, yeah, he could start kissing it, or kissing like her back bow and then working down.

I used the tongue at first. And he's tongue all the way in. Tongue around the round. She's just around and see how she's feeling. Lots of things. She might really like it. I know. I think that she'll get on your face, have a few orgasms and she'll just be putting your

hands, flip her over. Yeah. This is good. There's change in the world here. To say sit on my face. Right. I think, yeah, just pull her over on your face. Pull her over, yeah.

I'm trying to think like, how was it happen to me? Like, it wasn't like we had a blueprint. Like, it 906. You're going to say, my face. Right. I think we have, yeah, it's puller over on your face. Puller over, yeah. That's how I'm trying to think like, how was it happened to me? Like it wasn't like we had a blueprint. Like it's 906, you're going to say my face, it just was like, sit on my face. I'm like, okay, yeah. And sometimes I would say no, if I didn't feel like it. I think I know, but mostly I'm like down.

Yeah. And here's the other thing. So many people are like, I tried it once. And my partner said, no, or I asked once and he didn't do it. Listen to you, people, changing behaviors or getting someone to try something new is not a one time question thing.

Just because you don't feel rejected from your partner because you asked once or because you got it, it's not a process. So she might, like, like, here's the thing, Mike, she might say no the first time, and she would be like, I don't want to sit in your face, but that doesn't mean that it's no forever. I think that because they assume make these assumptions,

she might not be comfortable that night. Yeah. But there might be another time where you're like, I really would you want to sit on my out, you know, so just don't people get all good on that. It's a good time. It's a good time. To Anna, we know it's a fun. It's a good pleasure. Okay. Thank you. I think he really wants to. I know. It's really sweet. And it's so hot when it's, I really want to. It is. It's really hot. Why wouldn't she want to? But if she's feeling insecure,

but he makes her feel sexy and desired. And you know, you still desire her mic, of course. So people who are overweight are allowed to have orgasms, you know? Exactly. You'll lose the way. You can work on that. You lose the way, but keep having orgasms.

You're not keeping having orgasms in the process. You don't have to make a choice of one of the other. Exactly. People delay so much stuff, like when I lose five pounds, when I this happens, like don't delay anything in life. Like you still live your life. You don't know what's gonna happen. Right.

Good advice. Hey Emily, I've been with my boyfriend for almost three years. I used to love giving blow jobs, but my boyfriend takes forever. This is like lots of O's and lots of E's and lots of ours. He takes forever to finish, which isn't a bad thing, but my poor jaw starts to hurt and cramp up. And while giving him head is becoming chore,

and I now avoid it all around. I know I'm good at it from experience, I need help. Elizabeth, 25 lost angeles. We get a lot of emails from women who are like, I like it, but I'm exhausted. I don't know if I do a good job. So I feel like a lot of emails from women who are like, I like it, but I'm exhausted. I don't know if I do a good job. So, I feel like a lot of women think they just have to like use their mouth the whole time.

When they have their tongue and they have their hands, you can use lube, you can like mix it up. You know, your job... Why does she feel the need that she has to blow him to completion? You know? I don't do that very well. That's a good point. You could just blow your first floor play. For a while and then hop on there. Exactly. No, that's a good point too. He might, some guys do just take forever. Yeah. And it's okay, but right, does he need

you, if he really wants to like, come in your mouth or something and that's the thing you could blow him, start having sex and he's about to come, he could come in your mouth. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of guys, especially if he's been having sex with her for a while, why would he want it? Three years. Yeah, why would he want to come from a blow job? Right. That's a good point.

I mean, some guys do, maybe she's like on her period as I want to sex, which I don't understand either, but I know a lot of women are like that. But I feel like you're being hard on yourself here. But if you really do just want to do it because you you just wanna do it, I'd say use your hands, use your hands, you'll have to do it. You'll have to do it. Do you even do like blowjob, like your favorite blowjob tips are like every time,

I, this is what I do, like, it's the thing. I feel like you might know stuff your way around the penis. It's like, thing, you know, the snake charmer thingy. No, tell me everything, break it down. It's not like you just, it seems like this is what most guys, like, and I actually, in all honesty, anyone can know it who watches a lot of my scenes,

like I'm a horrible deep throeder. I've tried everything. Okay, this is good. I really don't know how to do it. Like I give it my all. Right. I think it's the same. I'm also horrible at taking shots,

and I think it comes from the same place that you're a throat. You know? I can't make it that bad. But a lot of, I don't know if they're just trying to make me feel better, but a lot of guys have told me that the deep-throening doesn't actually feel that good. It just looks cool. Right.

And you know, sometimes guys get off because they're like, whoa, this girl can put my whole dick in her mouth. Exactly. That's exciting. So they're kind of getting off on how it looks. But they're not going to come back. They're not going to come back. But the actual feeling, you know, I find that what most

they charmer go on obsessed. Yeah, where you just you get the dick like really wet, you know, and then you just use both of your hands and you like twist them around like a corkscrew. Right. Both going different ways, going different ways. Up and down. Yeah. Up and down. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right. And your mouth doesn't have to be you can put your mouth in the tip if you're about. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Put your mouth in the have to be, you can put your mouth on the tip if you're about to do a gypsy tire. Yeah, I put your mouth on the tip.

So your hands are going like, they're both hands on the penis while I'm getting really, really, really slow. Yeah, just a lot of my blow jobs are 70% hand jobs. Right, every blow job is an orthodox thing anyway, right? I start with my mouth, you know, just to get it really, really wet, you know, and then I just like, basically, I think the most sensitive part of the penis is on the tip, right? Yeah, well, it's a tip and then the frendylam, which is the little, the part, the ridge

on the bottom side right beneath the tip. Yeah. The tip is the most sensitive and then the other thing. Right. But yeah, the tip is using a lot of tongue and just your mouth on the tip and hands. Exactly. Exactly. Lick around the tip, your jaw will not go tired and use your hands going in separate.

We should do a video showing you the hands. We're going to put this on Instagram, a little video over showing that. It seems to work a lot. Yeah, I even noticed if I'm doing a sex scene with a guy who's kind of having a rough day and he doesn't have an erection, like immediately if I do that on almost anyone

for a couple minutes, it usually wakes up. It usually wakes up just because, what do you think is because the pressure that it has on your right eye? I don't know what it is, you know? Snake Charmar, that's what my boyfriend calls it is? It's the pressure that I do has all your weight. I don't know what it is. You know, there's snake charmer. Yeah, that's what my boyfriend calls it because of the snake charmer. Oh my god.

So any penis will wake up in your hands when you need to snake charmer. Yeah, I've had it. I mean, knock on wood. Right. Right. Like, knock on what he's doing. You know, because it happens sometimes important guys are just having a bad day. It's a stressful job.

It is stressful. Very stressful job. So I've noticed that if I ever do that, if I'm like, oh fuck. And everyone's already got that look on their face, like, all right. You're like, bring out the same thing. Yeah, I'm just like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Give me a minute. Yeah. I got this. I got it, I got it, I got it. Everybody just calmed down. That word is every time, but it seems to work. It's simple. Okay, check out, we're gonna do a video of this.

This is great. But what about any other tips like that that I need to know and we need to know about the penis or the vagina? Like what about an oral sex tip? I'm going down a women's trick that works a lot for you. I think for women, I feel like women, you just have to find their spot. And the spot is either on the outside or it's on the inside.

You know, it's a hilarious or a g-spot, right? And so I think with women, like if there's spots on the outside, you kind of just, you gotta just feel around and when the girl starts getting excited, just stay there. Stand that spot. Stand that spot, whatever it is,

just don't move. Yeah, stop and get harder and you know, and on the inside, I find it like, usually if you kind of curve your fingers a little bit. Do you kind of reach in there, like you'll find, the inside I find it like usually if you kind of curve your your fingers a little bit Right, just kind of reach in there like you'll find you'll find it you find it It's the worst thing is when someone finds it and they leave you know, right Where'd you go? What are you doing? Right that was good on the other side

I'm starting all over which I'd be moaning and screaming This is the most communication that sometimes guys Women we're not paying attention. So maybe this is it felt good. This isn't a sex aim where we need three positions Right go back you could say also if you're if you've experienced as you could say Bay that felt so good What you were doing a second ago? I just direct up say I'm like if the guys or a girl is like doing a good job And then and then they move, I'm just like, no, go back. I'll say that. I love that you're just so,

because you're like, really these people, are they doing this to do it? They're doing this to do it. There is something to that though. No, but I don't think it's that's, I'm the same way. I'm like, do this, do that, but it's, because that's how we've been. You've had.

But a lot of it comes from to go back, yeah, from confidence. You don't really have it in you to say that stuff until you're confident. Right. And you could also just try it and see how it goes even if you don't feel confident. Yeah. And I think you'll be happy because I know that I hear from men and women. They're like, I just want to know what he wants. She wants. So that's a way of saying what you want. You know, what a relief that is like, for so what is the drawback to saying go back to that spot that felt good? Your partner's trying to please you.

They didn't move to like be mean. They weren't like moving from your hotspot. Or if you say that moment, wow, that felt good over there or get back over there, they're psyched. They know what to do. I know. I think being honest is important.

I really, I know that for years, I was giving really horrible blow jobs. And just took the right person to be like, hey, that doesn't feel good. So tell me about, I get these, okay, what was the horrible blow jobs. It just took the right person to be like, hey, that doesn't feel good. Okay, so tell me about I get these, okay, what was the horrible job? And it was really traumatizing when it was happening. No, but...

See, we get these emails a lot. So what was the horrible blow job? Can you give me an example of what you were doing? I'm trying to think, I think I was just kind of putting my mouth on it and not really moving around. No pressure, no suction. You have to know this was before, like things are so easy to find out now.

No, no. I You have to know this was before, like things are so easy to find out now. No, I didn't watch any porn. I didn't really have friends. I could ask. I didn't talk to my girlfriends about sex. I just didn't. I don't know why. I think I was jealous that they were having it and I wasn't.

So I just didn't want to hear about it. Right. No, but then you learn. You can get better at it. Yeah, I think it always took me up. I felt like I just kind of put my mouth on there And didn't really do very much or I didn't use my hands. I didn't really get it right. How would you? Like it's a blow like it's a blow. Yeah, what do I do? No one tell us right and

So yeah, I just took someone being like that just as can you do this? It doesn't feel good what you're doing Someone being honest with me. But I'd be honest. Yeah, how was I supposed to know? I don't have a dick right now. We don't know. I mean, eventually, when I went down on the women, it made sense. Because I was like, oh, I'm just going to do this person

what I would do to myself that makes sense to me. That was really easy, right? What did I know? Right, you know? It's so easy to find, you know, find things out now. Right, it's true. It's like, it was like the, like I was a caveman or something, or when you're around.

Right. When I was giving blow-dops to people before Twitter. Right, right. Pretty Twitter guys. It did. It wasn't always around. Yeah. Podcasts were not as right.

Right. No, how would you know you're right? I wanted to do. I mean, I remember my first one. I was like six to eight braces. And my boyfriend at the time was like, I would them for a year and you wanted a blow-dops so bad. I'm like, I'm getting them off next week. And you're like, I remember my first one. I was like six to eight braces. And my boyfriend at the time was like, I would them for a year and you want a blowjob so bad. I'm like, I'm getting them off next week.

And he like, I remember my first one. He just made me do it. I'd break his, like, I don't know. I know. Yeah, I would put my, like, I think somebody, I heard somebody say don't use your teeth. So I put my mouth completely over my teeth. And I just, I don't know what I was doing.

Right, really? But you learn, you get feedback. So that's why it's good to give feedback. Check out my site, check out Joanna giving actual blow jobs and I'm just like, or everyone else giving blow jobs on your site. Use your hands. Use your hands.

It's fine. It's fine to use your hands, right? Balls? How do you call balls? I like looking balls just like occasionally. Yeah, not the whole time. Not the whole time. Just like you visit them once every three minutes.

Right, I forgot about the previous. I had a really bad them once every three minutes. Right, I forgot about it for years. I had a really bad experience once. Like I was like, I hit someone's balls. I always felt like my post traumatic ball disorder phase where I was like, I like just pretending that they didn't exist. I was like, I blocked them out of my mind. And then finally I was like, it's complicated.

I was like, what do I do with them? I don't know. Where do I go? Softly, and it's almost like, it's like those Ben Wal-Balls. You put your hand, you gently hold them. And then you showed me. Yeah. Like I was like, oh, and I'm like, oh, okay,

this one's you can put it in your mouth, lightly suck them in, but not all the time, then I forget it, I'm like, oh, shit, the balls, I'm talking to a ball, it's like I've said a calendar, like we visit them. Right, the three balls,

the third Tuesday of every month. Okay, we got what we're questions, awesome. Hi Emily, usually I wouldn't ask anyone for help typical guy I can fix it, but anyway more men writing in the night. Yeah, we know a lot of men Yeah, at least I have these all men say we get some women, but yeah, we get a lot of men and women But they don't know yeah, it's so nice to know they really care about pleasing Yeah, that's what the questions are about. They all want to know how to please or they're worried about their penis Fine with your penis guys. Yeah, penis size is fine. Okay. Emily, usually I would ask a typical guy. I think I can fix it.

Anyway, I'm engaged in our sex life blows and not in the good way. She doesn't give head, doesn't receive head, doesn't do anal, doesn't want to try new thing new in the bedroom. So it's basically either I'm on top or she's on top. So she's me personally, I'm into a lot of things and I'm up to try new things. Plus, outside the bedroom, I don't get to show any affection. The only time I get to show an affection is the time she decides I'm good enough to have sex with.

My phrasing, not hers. I'm just lost and what to do. I feel like I'm the guy she needs around to help with our kids. Lately, I've been wondering if she's cheating anything would help Tristan age 29 Illinois and they're engaged and they have kids and he's 29 and they're having the sex life seems abysmal So it sounds like it's just gonna get worse. Yeah, that's my concern. I was gonna say if you're not married Then don't get married. Yeah, I was gonna say how are you gonna feel? You know like there's a lot of work here. I mean because

If you can even get this far, I don't know. Exactly. Like she's not into anything you're into and you're just going to be frustrated. And what I don't like her. And then he might wind up cheating eventually. Right. You know, that's not wait. And then it sounds like she's sad. But she's also using sex as a bargain tool. She's saying, she's saying if he's good enough to have sex with. So I feel like he's really not helping, she's not helping yourself, it's deemed Tristan, and she's not willing to compromise. On sex is like, you gotta have the conversations,

and you've got, I mean, these are like, she won't give head, she won't receive. I mean, these are, I'm just telling you Tristan, I know you're like probably thinking sex, it's only sex with kids and life is good. It sex is so important. This one separates you from your friends now. It sounds like you have more of a bitchy roommate.

Right, right. And then a caring, you know, than a girlfriend. Right. But that's what- This might need some therapy because I see a lot of things in here, and Tristan, I know, I- I know. You're probably even sure,

and so you can get a few sessions, people are like, oh, therapy's a big thing. It's not because if this, the fact that you've children, I'm not going to say like break off the engagement yet. But what I am going to say is that the, you go see a sex therapist, these things will not change, but there's also the, her saying, you're not good enough to have sex with. So that's damaging yourself as team. And I don't like what she's speaking to you.

And so there's a lot, and you're wondering if she's cheating. It so, there's a lot in your warning, she's cheating. It sounds like there's a lot going on here. And this is all there in gate. This is supposed to be the honeymoon phase. Yeah, this is supposed to be good. You're planning the wedding. If they've already been married for five years and things are, you know, bad, that's different.

Like, you're engaged. You're supposed to be in the gu- You're fucking gu- Like, bunnies. Like, you're supposed to be, you know, I'm sure having kids changes things, but you should be really into each other right now.

Right, they should be, but they also have kids. But when people have kids that does throw a wrench in it, I get it, but it's all I'm saying if you don't nip this in the bud now, however you have a cut you say, we have to put this on hold till we go fix sort this out. But I don't think like one or two talks with her is going to help, but just why I think you need a third party because you do have kids. He's feeling like she's just using him for the kids. He's like, I think she just wants me on how but the kids like, none of this is a good

foundation for my parents. So did I think they're her kids? I don't think he says our kids. He says she needs help with our kids. Okay. So these are, there's a lot of things, but she might have some resentments built. Maybe she feels like she needs more help. But inside you, maybe you need a nanny.

Maybe she feels like to post part of it. Who knows? Maybe she feels them feel good about herself. This is why we need some help. It needs to be stated. This is a problem. Right. We can't go on like this.

Exactly. I wouldn't go, don't approach her and say, are you cheating? Because that's going to so I'll attack. Yeah. Even if you have that feeling, that can come out later after you start talking about your problems. Like sometimes I wonder if you're getting on me, but don't like don't start with that because she'll feel attacked. Even if you have that feeling, that can come out later after you start talking about your problems. Like sometimes I wonder if you're dating on me. But don't like don't start with that.

Don't shut down. Just say, I think we should say is like, you know, I've really been thinking about this a lot lately. And I just, I'm really missing this connection with you, this intimacy. Like, because he's not getting affection outside either. Like some, you know, he wants to hold our hand when they're probably whatever it is or make out, you know,

he's not getting affection blow jobs sex and she's being verbally like abusive. So you can tell you where I'm not feeling intimately connected to you and I'm worried about some of these things and I know we love each other and I think we need to get some help. And if she refuses and she doesn't want to talk about it at least try to talk about it with each other. Yeah you could try first that going there, but you could say listen, you could even play her this show I mean if you want I mean a lot of couples listen together That's how they help their Chris is really hard to have these conversations Tristan. I get it So you just open it up and be like listen and you get into a routine

You're like I'll tell her tomorrow. I'll tell her tomorrow. I trust him Do this now. Do it this weekend or when the kids are sleeping just say listen I've been I love I've been really concerned lately. I want to tell you how I've been feeling and the more that we Feeling worse. They say use an eye statement and I Staping that you don't attack you don't have me you won't give me blow jobs Like I feel you can't come down on salmon for how they feel you say I feel hurt I feel Disconnected from you. What do we do about this?

Right. You, you know, don't get it. Exactly right. What do we do? You're exactly right. What are your suggestions? I understand that you're straight. You know, what do we do?

And then just put it out there. So you could try that. Maybe, you know, she's got, she might have a lot to say about this. If you guys have not had one of these real true intimate conversations in a while, it sounds like that's a great way to start. See, where it goes? But good luck with this Tristan and I know. Good luck. Don't rush.

Don't rush into marriage when you can't even, you know. Just see us. The whole dance. Yeah, just get a look at us. That's what I said. Yeah, that's what I said. Okay, do I have to say so fun? Yeah, thank you.

We're all flew by. We're like, I'm here for five minutes. I know. Well, this is why we're going to do some more shows. Yeah. I love this. Wow. It's like we're going to do some more shows. I love this. Wow. It's like we knew each other in a past life or something. I think we did.

I think we did. We're both like, I know. We might be like the same for two. I know, we might be. We're going to find out after. But check out everything at Joanne Angel.com. If you are into sexy people having sex and porn, Joanne has a great site. Very popular.

A lot of couples like watching my porn together, so to put it out there, if you are a guy looking for the right porn to watch with your girlfriend, go to Burning Angel.com, why do you think that is a couple friendly? Because people always do ask this, it's a great suggestion. I don't know, and the funny thing is, is we never made quote porn for couples.

A lot of stores that carry porn for couples, I don't know. And the funny thing is, is we never made quote porn for couples. A lot of stores that carry porn for couples. I don't carry my porn because it's not like a ton of foreplay or I don't even know. It's so weird, but people have decided that couples and women like which is so far off. So, right. Exactly. But I don't know.

A lot of, what's your favorite movie? Not a porn movie. They've never been to your site, which one would you send them to? Sorry, a lot of pressure. I know. That's a lot of pressure, I got something to eat. You could think about it. Yeah, you know, just go there. Yeah, just go there.

We'll see what you like. A lot of couples do like watching the movies that I've made with plots in them because they think they can watch the plot, Jill got it together. Then they get like aroused during the sex scene and then they could go back to kind of talking about it. Like it's a movie night.

But yeah, it's a popcorn like Netflix and you know, Jill and Bernie Angel and Chelsea. Yeah. So we love, okay, so it's a movie night. But it's a popcorn like Netflix, you know, to join a burning angel in child. Yeah. So we, okay, so it's at join an angel on Instagram and Twitter and the website burning angel.com. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you. This was a lot of fun. I know, it's just great.

Okay, thank you everyone for listening and for supporting our sponsors. And thank you producer Madison. Thank you Eddie, Laurie and Jamie. I have a great team. And thanks everyone for listening. Was it good for you? Email me.

Feedback at sexwithemily.com. Bye. Bye.