Sex With Emily - Better, Hotter Summer Sex

Episode Date: July 24, 2018

On today’s show, Emily is covering everything from staying cool during summer sex to whether or not you should stay friends with your ex. She talks about how ice cubes and frozen sheets can make your bedroom experiences hotter, why a great sex life is all about compromise, and the study that says sex can give you more meaning in life. Plus, she tells us why a vibrator won’t ruin your orgasms, some shower sex compromises, and semen questions. Thank you for supporting our sponsors who help keep the show FREE: Apex, JO, Promescent Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. On today's show, I'm talking about staying cool during summer sex. Whether you should stay friends with your ex and why great sex life is all about compromise. All this and more, thanks for listening. 5-6 Eyes that mock our secret institutions Betrubize they call them in a fight on me Hey Evelyn, you got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute

The girls got a hair standard, oh my The women know about shrinkage Isn't it common with all of it? What do you mean like laundry? It shrinks Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I want to feel so drunk

Being bad feels pretty good. You know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. Check out everything we have at sexwithemily.com and you can also follow us on social media, Instagram, Twitter, Facebook. I'm there if you're there. So we can hang out, follow me, love hearing from you. And today's show I'm going to be answering your emails, which I love doing, helping you all have better socks and relationships. But first, I got some sex in the news to talk to you about.

First one is a article that came out, should you stay friends with an ex? What do you guys think about that? I've always been a big fan of staying friends with an ex. What do you guys think about that? I've always been a big fan of staying friends with my ex. Now, not the exes that were, you know, the ended badly or the exes who, you know, still your credit card and bloop your card and stuff like that. Like, you, you know, stalked you. It's okay to have a distance or maybe if you got a restraining order against them. No, you don't have to stay friends with those, but people just assume

that like, well, I could never handle it or or you know, maybe we just kept it after never see each other again. And I think in some cases you can't be friends right away, typically. You don't become best friends the next day. That's not realistic. You still have feelings tied to that romance and those emotions. And also the chemistry might still be there. But I think personally, if you're attracted to someone enough to be in a relationship or you care about them and you actually love them, that I think if you are both mature emotional adults, you can might be able to get to where you actually

could just salvage the friendship. And I'm be friends for life. In fact, a lot of my exes are my friends for life. So the article breaks down that, you know, obviously if it wasn't abusive and if they were toxic, you probably don't want to stay friends with those people. But it also, if you had a strong connection and a really strong love affair at a very erotic life, it can be harder to kind of transition right into being in a relationship if you still have feelings for them. I think that you can actually be friends with,

in X, if you're doing it with the right intention. So if you're, it's kind of like the friends with benefits thing. If you're like, oh no, we really are just friends with benefits. I don't want anything more. And you do, you know how that's going to end not very well. So if you're still staying friends with an X because you think, I'll play the friend card. But I hope that they're just going to spend enough time with me or I'll be with them enough that we're going to fall back and love again. That is not a real friendship. That's like a fake friendship with your ex.

The ones that I think that are really deep and that work actually do take work. Sometimes you have to like work on some things from the past. You know, it's interesting. There was a story in here that from someone who I thought was very inspiring. A writer in Vermont named Robin said she burned all of her relationships to the ground

and wasn't friends with any of her exes. But in pursuit of her own personal growth, she reached out to her ex-partners, she apologized for past transgressions and tried to reclaim the relationship they'd shared for years. And so, you know, in what she says, a huge chunk of her life is co-owned by this person and those pieces of her were missing and she wanted a reclaimment, so she said to them, can we repair this relationship? Which I think is healthy. If you've ever, you've ever moved past a relationship, but you can't get out of your mind,

you're like, I wish I didn't behave that way. Or things went differently. I think it's totally OK to circle back and repair. I think all relationships do really well with repair. And I can think of very few, unless there's something serious or jail time where you can't actually repair things, even if it's just a phone call. So I also think that, say, there are some partners who might be triggered also by the fact

that if you're like, oh, I'm best friends with my ex, which I used to make the mistake of doing that because I actually was best friends with my exes and still am. But when people hear that, a lot of people just think, oh, that means you still love them. Most people don't see that's normal. They don't think that's possible. I think that's kind of crazy. You have to be, I think, careful with a new partner and just let them know, yes, this person is your ex, but we have a really meaningful friendship.

I can't wait for you to meet them. You're really going to like them. Just having a mysterious ex floating out there that your new partner doesn't know, that can also wreak havoc on a relationship. Finally, I also think it's important you guys you guys have to set boundaries. It's important if you are couples turn into friends. Al the boundary could be like, you know, I don't let's just let's not text, let's not talk every day, let's build this again slowly. And still ask them like right now it's funny that I have my boyfriend and my ex from a few years ago

we actually all are friends, but I actually had to say to him once early on, the ex and me like, are you cool with this? Like, are you cool if I bring my boyfriend to this place? I go, yeah, I want to meet him and then instantly they're friends. So I think it's okay. We all know that this and that thing is easy for everybody, but I'm also saying kind of think about it because if there are people you want in your life from your past and you like to bring them back, I just want you guys to know that it is possible

It is possible to still have a loving support of relationship with an ex If you do it right with compassion and with truth. Okay, there's a new study that shows sex gives a meaning to life So what gives meaning to life? This is a question that has been debated at least since the days of the ancient Greek philosophers. The discussion has centered on the question of which is more important for fulfilling life. Pleasures of the body are pleasures of the mind. Well according to a psychologist who did the study, he says that it's true when it comes to questions of sexuality in everyday life, there's still an undercurrent of Puritinism in North America.

And this is reflected in the kind of studies funding agencies are willing to finance and journal editors are willing to publish. But I think that there's a lot of studies that are on sexuality, a lot of them focus on the negative and how they're going to mess us up with intimacy and sexual abuse and all that. But what he did is study, he looked at the positive aspects of sexuality. And he asked the question, is engaging in sexual activity lead to an increased sense of meaning in life?

They conducted a time lagged analysis. That is, they considered whether sexual activity on one day was correlated with a positive mood and sense of fulfillment on the next day, and it was. Then they looked at whether positive mood and sense of fulfillment on the next day. And it was. Then they looked at whether positive mood and sense of meeting on day one predicted the sexual activity on day two. It did not. So what this means is the time lag analysis suggests that having sex leads to a positive mood

and a sense of fulfillment that continues into the next day. So I really believe that, especially if it's been a while and you're like, it's just hard to get back out there and do it, I really believe. And I hear this from people all the time, my listeners, my while and you're like, it's just hard to get back out there and do it. I really believe, and I hear this from people all the time, my listeners, my friends are like, God, things were tense in our relationship and I realized we just had it had really great sex

in a while. So if you're like withholding and you think you're past that point and you're really mad at your partner, I say like, get out of the house, take a vacation this summer, even it's for a night and have more sex. Because the more sex you have, apparently, you're gonna have more happy and fulfilling sex lives.

So one of the final things that I liked about this study is it's very consistent with a lot of studies we see today about happiness and life fulfillment, and that is meaningful social relationships are absolutely essential for a sense of well-being and purpose in life. I'm telling you, studies are reading on health,

and really a lot of them aren't happiness and what does it mean when you have a great life and what do people on their deathbed talk about is the greatest, most fulfilling, satisfying things. It always comes back to the quality of your relationships, the quality of your relationships, determines the quality of your life. Okay, and finally, guys, this is the, how do I better sex this summer portion of the show? I feel like I talk about this. I've mentioned this on different shows.

Summer sex, it's funny because when I first started doing sex as an Emily, I remember every single year we got a summer sex, you know, from Cosmo or from different, you know, magazines, newspapers, people always, you know, want to know what is a secret to great summer sex. And so I thought, you know, I don't know that I covered this last summer, how much they have, but since summer is a great time to have really hot sex reification, maybe we're not working as much when we're relaxed, I thought you should brush up on your best summer sex skills.

So let me give some of these to you. So first thing, these are just some tips. You can, even if you just take a hat, one of these, I will be so happy. And I'm so you. All right, chill your sex toys. Glass and ceramic toys can be warmed up or cooled down for added sensation.

So when there's a heat wave, you just might want to cool them down. You can stick your toys in the fridge, not the freezer unless you want a freezer burn and those awkward trips to the emergency room that might end up on a TV show, or dip them in a glass of ice water before you use. Make sure your toys are waterproof before you do that. Obviously, now I was thinking about that.

That's interesting because a lot of my favorite toys, the Wevibe Tango, I'm putting that baby in the freezer. Like why not? That bullet, you guys, that, but Peele is on hand. I don't know. I feel like I've been giving a lot of love to the touch. The wee-give touch, which is like me asking me like to choose my favorite child, which one I love.

But the tango is just this, like I'm going to grease you guys, I'm bringing the tango. It's a bullet, it's powerful. It's waterproof. I'm gonna put it in the freezer and it's just the strongest, cutest little bullet you ever did see.

No one even knows the vibrator. Okay, so do that or do it with any toys or do it with your delos. Pop some ice in your mouth for oral sex. I like this idea for any season, but especially in the heat wave, if you are sweating your ass off and I remember this in Michigan, those really, really hot summer nights. We didn't have air conditioning and we just had fans and you're dripping hot sweat. I wish I knew about the ice cube trick. Have ice cubes by the bed in a jar, in a bowl,

you can put one in your mouth and you can trace it over your partner's body. Trace it along there, you can put it in your mouth. Use it while you're licking and sucking your partner. You can use it really everywhere. You can take your hands and tape it over their body or your mouth, use it while you're licking and sucking your partner. You can use it really everywhere. You can take your hands and deep drape it over their body or your mouth or just kiss each other with an ice cube. I mean, and for oral sex, you guys,

have it in your mouth for oral. Okay, enough said, just try it. Let me know how it goes. I think you're gonna be happy. This is a great one, you guys. Put sheets in the fridge. I never thought about this. This is a great one, you guys. Put sheets in the fridge. I never thought about this. This is new to me.

So I guess people in Spain often keep their bed sheets in the fridge, so sliding under blanket doesn't feel so hellish. It gets hot there. Really hot, it gets hot here too. So as sexy as satin and slick sheets are, if they're sticking to your body, that's not so hot. So I love the idea.

I'm ready to flip over my pillow and that would make it a little cooler because it was so freaking hot in Michigan. So I think putting the freezer brilliant. Play with some new positions. If you are just totally against all that sticky sweatier now what nobody touched me right now. Missionary might feel a little bit suffocating.

So doggy style. Doggy style is great for using toys, using your hands. You get some extra clitoral stimulation plus doggy style. Doggy style is great for using toys, using your hands. You get some extra literal stimulation plus doggy style gives you enough space from each other and you can still have the hot sex. For foreplay, maybe just stick to oral. I'd be fine with that if you think it's too hot for making out and kissing.

But I don't know. I mean, I guess I forget what it's like to be just in suffocating heat. But I, you know, really, if you go right to oral, everyone wins. And I'm Sharer Sex. You know I've talked a lot about Sharer Sex. If you haven't seen one of my favorite videos I did in 2018 with Jamie, producer Jamie, it was our Sharer Sex video.

We had sex in the shower, and it's on Instagram. I think you will love it. We didn't actually have sex. We talked about sex in the shower, which is a really cool line of products from sports sheets. But I know you guys, you think sex in the shower is always going to be amazing. And the truth is it's not someone could fall, they could slip, they could end up in the emergency room. And like what positions feel right, you still need lube. Can you get pregnant? There's all these things that make it challenging. So I think you can number one, stick to oral

sex in the shower. Like you don't have to go through the whole thing. Just because you say, let's go in the shower and get cooled off or you can still just like make out into oral and then kind of, you know, go back into the bed. You could also try one of the sport-cheats sex in the shower things that have suction, controls, and handles that are really easy. They stick to your shower and you can hold onto it. They have a foot brace and a handle and they even have a vibrating mesh sponge. It has a little vibrator on it and it's really cool.

You can choose some cooling lube. So there's lots of lubs out there that have a cooling effect. There's also nipple bombs that are really cooling. I think that Joe has some cooling stuff. Go to sexwithatelme.com slash joke because I know they have some good cooling lubs and stimulators and things like that.

So that's my sex advice for you guys for the summer. Let me know if I missed anything here. Let me know what your tips are through getting through a hot summer. I'm gonna answer emails right now and thanks everyone for listening. Thanks for supporting our sponsors and I'll be right back. Okay everyone, we are on to answering your email questions.

I love hearing from you, so you can text Ask Emily all one word to 7979.7979 and fill out the short form or you can also go to my website, sexfamilie.com and click the Ask Emily tab. As always, include your name, your age, where you live and how you listen to the show Okay, this is from Sarah 29 Florida Hey Emily, I've been masturbating for a long time, but I've never used a vibrator I really want to start using more toys with sex and masturbation But I wonder if using a vibrator to climax will it be the same without one?

I do use my hands to touch myself a lot and I really like it, but a vibrator to climax will it be the same without one? I do use my hands to touch myself a lot and I really like it, but a vibrator I'm sure would feel amazing. I'm just afraid of it not feeling good with just my hand after getting used to vibrator. Is this true at all? Sarah, I think this is such a great question. Let me tell you why. There are a lot of people who are like, oh no, no, I don't need a toy or like that's a gateway to, I don't

know what, but I understand you're articulated this very well. You're wondering, will I ever go back to my hand? Will I ever go back to masturbating without a toy? And I think that is a choice. I think that it's great that you know how to touch yourself, you know, with your fingers and you can move to orgasm. And I think you'll always be able to have an orgasm with your hands and even enjoy it. So I think the thing about a vibrator is,

I don't think there's any inferior kinds of orgasms or like it's like cheating if you use a vibrator. I just think it's cool to try out what vibrator feels like versus your hands. I don't think that there's one that's better than the other. I think that sounds like a vibrator. It's a sure thing. Like it's maybe for some women who don't think it's faster, you can move in different places, your finger simply does

not vibrate, and it's a really cool sensation. But it's just really just a different, you know, path to pleasure, not necessarily like superior or inferior. And you could always just start with the trying a vibrator out, if you're interested, and then maybe end with your hands, or vice versa, or use a vibrator one time and use your hands next time. And they're also really fun to use, you know, when you're having sex with a partner. So I just think this whole like, am I numb? Am I addicted to my vibrator? Just like everything. It's a choice. So if you feel like yourself, like anything you get, it's moderation.

So if you're like, I'm using the vibrator every time and that's it. And only during sex, you know, I'm not going to judge you if you don't have a problem with it, that's fine. But if you feel like, no, I'd like to moderate it. I'd like to still use my hands and, you know, kind of use my, which you always, I think, should use your hands. There's a lot of great places to explore. But yeah, I don't think you need to worry about it again. I'm telling you what you need to know. And you have the choice. And the Weevipe Tango, speaking which would not be a bad first vibrator, just because when I was about to say about the Tango earlier,

it reminds me of the first vibrator I had, which was also a bullet vibe. It was the Doc Johnson Puckett rocket, and it had batteries to it. And this was like when they first came out, the Tango, they were like, oh, it's like a souped up bullet, and it really, it truly sticks to his name. So I think that's a great starter. Toy. Okay, this is from Rachel 22 in Miami. Hi, Emily. So in

the current year, I've caught about three UTIs. I'm prone to frequent UTIs. I've taken the antibiotics before and a few days later my UTI always comes back UGG. Whenever my wife and I have sex I'm always worried I'll catch another one. So lately the way I've been dealing with it is by drinking tons of water, peeing before and after sex, and taking over the counter meds to cope with the discomfort and I'm usually able to fight it off. But every now and then there's no avoiding the inevitable. Please help me only. I'm desperate. I don't want sex to become a chore. I want you all to enjoy sex with my boyfriend and not dread the results. Well, this is actually common Rachel. I've heard from women like having

chronic UTIs is actually a thing. So definitely go to your doctor if you have not. And if you saw your doctor and they were like, you know, hey, no problem, then I think in a second opinion, if you don't feel like you got sufficient information, because I'm going to assume you haven't seen your doctor because you might already, they might have already told you what I'm going to tell you is that there are treatments for it. And it could be signs of other things. So a woman who gets frequent, you know, UTIs and chronic infections could mean that there's an indication of something else going on, that you're not able to clear the bacteria. You might have other symptoms as well, and the antibiotics just might not be working

with you anymore. And actually, the studies say that 26 to 44% of females with their first UTI will experience a second one within six months and that periods of reoccurrence last one, two years before the infection ceased. So if it's only been like two years, you might be an okay window, but I think it's important to get tested

and doctors might not always have the resources that they need. Another thing is interstitial cystitis. And that's when you would talk to your doctor about, get your urine cultured. There can be a lot of women who do have it and kind of at first for like a year or two and then it passes and others don't. So I think again, go to your doctor, get some more information. I'm sure you're probably fine.

I love their drinking water and doing all those things, but talk to a doctor. See what they say. So thank you, Rachel. Moises 24 New Jersey. Hey Emily, I've been my girlfriend for six years and sexually we are great. I love everything about her and I try to be spontaneous with her. The thing is she loves shower sex or showering together in general. We used to do it at the beginning but I never enjoyed it that much. The sex was good but uncomfortable. I'm six", so that's one of my issues.

Also, I don't like to share the shower. To me, the shower is a place to think, and relax, and let the water run for a while on my head. I wanted to be happy, but I don't know how to compromise. Do I just settle and do what she wants? Comments? Thanks in advance. I love the podcast.

Summertime, Sharsex, it's the season. So, shower together sometimes, you know, but not always. This really is about compromise. And I understand at the beginning of a relationship, we all pretend to like, like things that we don't or we give things a second chance because we really like the person. So, I understand that as long as it doesn't go on for too long. Like oh, for six years, I was having shower sex. But you did at the beginning, I understand that. Here's a few options, compromise, you don't do it all the time. You can start out together and then let her leave so you can have your alone time.

And also just bottom line, let her write your thoughts on it. Tell her that you actually thought about this because you know how much she loves shower sex and there's nothing more than you love love like that you love them pleasing her and that you sometimes just kind of like to be alone in the shower because it makes you a better human because you have these thoughts and you get to work on yourself and you might know that that sounds weird but hey you know and it actually is there's actually studies around this that people have their most creative ideas in the shower so I understand what you're saying like those times and I have a double head shower at my house,

and there's times where I'm like, really, I just kind of want a shower alone. Not many times, man, it's because a double shower just kind of can't guess. But I get it. So let her know that you need your space sometimes, but you love being with her. You could also try section the shower.

I mentioned earlier from sports. She's kind of makes it fun. It makes it less uncomfortable because she can elevate herself, she can put her foot up, like you'll see what I mean if you go to our website or you go to sportsheets.com slash Emily, you're gonna understand what I mean. There's a lot of different things

to help you enhance your shower. What I found with these conversations around sex we're all trying to have, I think we assume it's gonna be horrible and our party's gonna hate us, but I can tell you that the more honest you are and the more open you are about, you know, what you really feel and what you really want,

while still like letting your partner know how much you love them, that you're gonna end up both getting what you really love and want. I probably do this noises, so you should still have your shower time and eat it too. This is from Lori Lori 35 in California. Hamley, I just started listening to your show because my husband has been listening to

you for quite some time. I'm a state-how mom, I've never been spontaneous with comes to the bedroom, but my husband has introduced me to vibrators, dildos, and porn. Whenever he goes down to me, I don't ever want to kiss him. Is that normal? I'm also scared to try eating it all. We've tried it a little, but as soon as I feel the pain, I pull away tips.

Okay, Lori, this is a great question because there are so many women listening now, just nodding their heads going, oh my God, I feel exactly the same way. So, first of all, I love that your husband is listening to podcasts. Clearly, if he's bringing vibrators to those in porn, he's been listening and taking some good notes.

I understand though, your husband's feelings about not wanting to kiss them after he goes down on you. I'm gonna assume you don't wanna kiss him because you just kinda find it gross or kind of unsanitary or you think like, why would I wanna kiss myself if he's got the taste of me and his mouth? But he might find that sexy.

And I think once you do it, you're going to get over it and not really be so concerned with that. It's a thing. You could also each take a sip of water. I mean, I still do that. I'm just thirsty after oral giving or receiving. So maybe having a glass of water by the bed always, which I do, might help that for you. You can have mint, so you can have mouthwash by the bed.

I think that's what you can do there. I think just try it. Your husband, your with him, your exchanging fluid, that's your own fluids. There's no safety precautions here. I think it's more about you moving past it and trying it and then also compromising and letting him know that it'd be better if he had a drink of water or had a mint. As far as the anal, so many women have been in your position. There's only people who have been in your position who have an anus and someone's tried to put something in it too fast, too quick, without enough loob.

So there's very specific things to anal that you need every single time. First of all, if you've never had it, he needs to go slow and probably just start with making sure that you're super turned on, you're warmed up, maybe he's gone down and new, maybe you even have had sex. Anal's not the kind of thing for beginners that you wanna start out as the appetizer. Like you just don't.

Like I think that anal comes when you're kind of more warmed up, you just wanna dive right into anal. Because it's important to maybe already have an orgasm to be really relaxed and to use last leave when it goes slow. So he could start with just a finger or a butt plug slowly using a butt plug because it can be kind of scary if you've never had even had that sensation. So even testing with his pinky finger and moving it slowly and then moving his way up. The thing about it is you really just want

to breathe. So when something is being inserted, like whether it's a finger or whether it's his penis, you want to first take a deep breath in and then when he inserts you let go, you exhale. And that kind of allows it to move in with a little easier and just a key of the communication, make sure that you're not tensing up because whenever we move something moves to our ends, we tense up because we're like nervous, it's gonna hurt and then guess what? It hurts. So, the reason why I probably hurt you is because you probably did the thing that a lot of us would do, we would tense up.

So I think trying to slow down, use Loub, use some fingers and to kind of let him know. I'll if he's listening, maybe he already knows. So why not try it and go at your own pace. Thank you, Laurie. On the other hand, we've got a seamen question. This is from Adam 26 in Australia. Hey, Emily, my girlfriend I've been going out for three years. And I would like to know the best way

to go about performing oral sex with my girlfriend after I have finished in her. In the past, I told her that an ex told me to drink my own seamen, which I did, and my girlfriend laughed at me. She also said that she hates to swallow semen too. The thought of performing oral sex in her after both com is such a turnum, but I'm not sure how to go about bringing it up with her or would it be best

if I just did it to see her reaction. Okay, Adam, okay, you've been together three years. She laughed at you once about telling you about the ex. I think time has passed. I'm not sure if you had this conversation at the beginning, but I think first try to do and see your reaction. You have a, it doesn't sound like you've tried and she pushed you away yet.

It sounds like you're thinking about all these past reasons of why it's gonna be awkward and why she's gonna run and scream me into the bathroom. So I think if you just kind of go down on her and you just kind of start doing it slowly and watch her reaction because I think that she might think it's hot. Also, when you start going down on her because you're still just so turned on and you want to keep going, again, that's really hot. And I don't think it's about you wanting to drink your own semen, which is cool if it

is, too. I think that there are guys that get off on that. So either way, even if she brings it up or she shoots up, she's like, you have a semen thing just like, no way, but I just think it's really a hot to like keep making you come. Like that has to be all that you say.

And that's, you know, you wanna talk more about you that you do like semen or whatever it is, she is your girlfriend, you gotta be honest with it, honest with all of this stuff. So she doesn't like semen. If she doesn't like semen, she doesn't necessarily have to ingest it.

I think that she could, you know, I guess she could give her a mouth and she could like spit it out. She could, the whole spitting versus swallow thing. I don't know. I think that there's a lot of women who, kind of assume they don't like it or again, just like ain't all they had a bad seaman experience, but this is not something that you want to

force on her. But when people say they hate to swallow seaman, I'm always wondering like just what happened, like what was something bad, someone forced you to do it. But yeah, I don't know. I guess it's also the taste for people. It's not for everybody. So if she doesn't like it, you really can't force her into it, but just like these other things where I think she might be cool with you going down in her after you come inside of her, she might get there where she does like Seaman, but if she doesn't,

hopefully she's still going down in you and giving you lots of pleasure that I wouldn't necessarily trip on it. If she's not performing oral sex, I've helped her in chasing before I'm oral sex and everything else is great and here's what I've also found. Couples who get closer together, they really have these not just like try crazy things in the bedroom,

but couples who have really real intimate conversations about sex, they tend to kind of shed their beliefs about what they used to think was possible with sex. So maybe she hates as well as Seaman. Once you guys get more intimate and vulnerable together and talk about sex, which is what I wish for every couple. She would be like, you know what?

I thought I hated it, but I feel really safe with you and maybe I'll try it again. Or maybe I, you know, people who think they never want to try anal or they never feel comfortable being on top. There's a lot of ways that our sex life's changed once we start to actually develop real intimacy with somebody meaning just honest communication and connection and come from sex from place of connection rather than just trying to check things off the box when we're in a place of like yeah, with someone where we're safe and comfortable talking about sex, you'd be surprised at where your sex life will go. Oh be surprised at where your sex life will go.

Oh, the place is your sex life will go. So thank you, Adam, for that question. Thank you, everybody, for your question today. I love hearing from you. I love you all. I hope you're having an awesome summer and lots of amazing sex and relationships and most importantly, self-love, because I love you all.

And I love my amazing team. Thank you Ken, volunteer Sarah, producer Jamie and Michael. Was it good for you? Email me feedback at sexwithemily.com you