Sex With Emily - Compliments, Confidence & First Date Faux Pas

Episode Date: March 5, 2016

On this show, Emily welcomes back Brian Howie from the Great Love Debate to pick up where they left off on the topics of love and sex. Together with Menace, they share personal dating experiences, pose provocative questions and try to get to the bottom of how to make sex and love better.How has dating changed in our app-driven social scene? What makes it so hard for people to get to the 2nd date? How is the dating climate influenced by the environmental climate? These are just a few of the topics Emily and Brian address on their journey to understanding love and relationships on a deeper level. Emily also takes a call from fellow podcaster and comedian Paul Mecurio; they reminisce about their first meeting, his bizarre Paul McCartney story and discuss how he really feels about anal.If you have any questions about the opposite sex and need a second or third opinion, you’re likely to find the answers you need in this show! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey everyone, thanks for listening to Sex with Emily and today's show I've got great love debates Brian Howe back in the studio to pick up where we left off on the subjects of sex and dating and we're also announcing some very exciting news. We'll also be taking a call from the hilarious podcaster Palm Curio and getting into a couple of your most pressing dating questions. Thanks for listening. But first, by now you've probably bailed on your near-resolutions to work out more. I mean, how many of you made a near-resolution

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He thinks you're kind of cute The girls got a hair stand It's so nice The women know about shrinkage Isn't it common knowledge? What do you mean like laundry? It's drinks Can we not talk about sex so much?

Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I'm off here so, girl. Being bad feels pretty good. You know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemlee.com. We can check out all of our podcasts, subscribe to our podcasts, hang out, read our blogs, videos.

It's a good, freaking time. Right, minus, hi, minus. Hey, what's going on? How you been? I'm been doing really well. I haven't really got to talk to you the past couple of podcasts We've had guests and I mean we have a guest today, which is a great guest that we've talked to before But I want to dive in and see what the hell's been going on in your life. Okay, what do you want now? What's the latest?

I saw you at I think last time I saw you in person It was at the Grammy pre interviews. Yeah, that was really fun You did the round tables and you talked to all the different radio DJs. Yeah, it was at the Grammy pre interviews. Yeah, that was really fun. And you did the round tables and you talked to all the different radio DJs. Yeah. How was that? That was fun. I loved sitting with your team.

Yeah. They were great with the Woody show. The Woody show. I love them. Yeah. And they were like, you should come in. Totally. And I made a momentous says, and not a lot to come in.

And then I thought, well, you're like, no, we don't have a guest. Like, why don't you come in? And then I'm like, man, that says, why me? And he doesn't want to mix his two families. And you're like, I'm, there, you're on that at all. It's not that at all. Okay. Well it's not something that we I wish it got it off. But which I told you a billion times but you never listen to me ever. I do. I do. I tell you why you shouldn't come in. But we already cleared it in no one care. Yeah. That's what they say. This very hallelujah. It's okay. It's fine. We'll see

how that goes. Who cares? It's gonna be fun That was fun and then I went to like yeah like 40 say I went out doctor drew. He was come with me So it was fun because we like tag team to yeah, this great love talking to dr. Drew How's the love line thing been going? It's amazing. I'm actually doing it twice a week now. Oh, what days and Thursdays? I am co-hosting love line. And so if you guys are interested, it is on like 40 stations in the country. However, it's also a podcast. So you can listen to Loveline as well. That's great. I know. It's really fun. They kind of bump that up. Super excited. Doing that. Yeah. And

so then I went to the Grammys, which is fun, which I've never been to like an award show. Yeah, you went with another woman. Susan Pinsky. So have you switched sides or what? What's going on? Who you dating? Oh, okay. No, who am I dating? Yeah. I'm not.

I've been on a few dates. Yeah. And I went out with this guy recently though, and it was... It was interesting. It was a nice dinner and Brian, you're welcome. Brian, don't worry. You don't have to be there silent. I didn't want to interrupt you. You're a date story. No, but I went on a date. It was actually a which was a nice dinner and Brian, you're welcome. Brian, don't worry, you don't have to be there silent.

I didn't want to interrupt you. It's your date story. No, but I went on a date. It was actually a few weeks ago, and we met. I really, I'm saying us, you know, I'm... How did you get set up on the state? I met him through my friend Anna. You were a dinner.

Your friend, so that's good. A friend, yeah, we were at like a dinner at Soho House, and she said... Did she date him before? No, but she's like, I don't know you on date him Got it to be here for I say Who cares, but he was really smart very very smart. I love smart very smart and he's like let's go out and so we um We went to dinner and went to like a nice restaurant and like the thing is I've lived here for a few years But I don't know my neighborhood very well, which is great like restaurants. He's like't know this, you don't know that. Let's go dinner. So, we went to dinner. What? No,

go ahead. I was like, no, no, it was fun. And we had a good time and we talked. He's very smart. And I didn't really feel like there was, um, where'd you go dinner? It's called revolution, revolution on LeBrea. Yeah. Right? It's nice. No, really nice. It was, it was fun. It was, it was, it's good dates. Yeah, we met there Which we'll talk about we talked about like you know, if we're new we're sure your date now So there's a lot of awkward kissing on the way home if you don't want to and it was we got really intense We talked about a lot of things like sex and date. He's a very interesting life We talked about his relationships and the waitress was really really friendly. She's coming over and she's like hi You know, can I help you? Would you guys want? She like let me taste all these wines. It was like a really fun night.

And we, I liked them enough, but at the end of the night, the waitress comes over and she gives me our bill. And she's like, hey, are you Emily? And I said, yeah, she was always what you know. I listened to your podcast and I was like, wow, that's great. It was great. However, I'm like, shit, what the hell did I talk of?

You know what I mean? Because I forget that this happens to me, like my Uber driver the other day. I was in Uber for 30 minutes driving to love lines I did in my car. And they can overhear you. The whole time I'm talking to my Ken, my VP, about everything going on in the office,

I'm having a assistant, and I get off, he's like, hey, I love your show, and I love to be your assistant, and then he keeps eating on me. So it's like you gotta be careful, because I don't think about that. Anyway, the waitress was interesting, because she's like, I was listening for years,

and then afterwards she pulls me, she was like, what do you think? Like I didn't think she was, I didn't think about that. Anyway, the waitress was interesting. I was listening for years. And then afterwards she pulled me, she said, what do you think? I didn't think you was your type. She was like, you didn't see the, she was like, even though waitress was shining you. So waitress, I'm like, who's, because I don't think that people know me. They're paying attention on the list.

Anyway, people know. People know. But it was, I liked him enough. And I think it's just good to get out and date and say, yes. But then he has met again. And the fact that I didn't answer for a few days leads me to believe that what happened is the end of the first day. Okay.

I did kiss him. Of course. He drove me home. So I over there, but then he had his car because it was raining really, really. And I kissed him because in the car, in the car. And it was an awkward, it was kind of an awkward kiss, but I feel that that's a pass because typically, I don't think that the first kiss is easy. It can.

People are nervous. No, but they're so, yeah, people are nervous. And then he was like, we should definitely do this again. I'm saying out. I'm like, yeah, yeah, we will. You know, but I just kissed him because whatever, but I haven't thought about him at all. Was he looking for the invite in? Would you like to come in?

Maybe. There was a pause where we were kissed, and I grabbed me back and he kissed me again. And I'm like, okay, bye. Because I like to come on and sex the Emily, how am I not getting invited in? That's such a weird issue. Well, it is. It was I must have failed so hard. But this is what I'm thinking is that in his mind he's thinking,

I'm gonna try. Yeah. Because if this is what happens to a sex with Emily, like it says on your business card, like I'm- Yeah, kissing the car is almost like striking out. Right. And so it's just so obvious if everyone comes to my house, right? Yeah.

So I said no, he didn't even offer, but I could see that he would usually be like, yeah, let's go to your house. So I said, yeah, good night. Let's talk after. Let's talk soon. And then he texted me and then I forgot. So that means I'm going to tell him. You can't, that happens.

You guys forget. Or even when we say, say you had to drive home or you took your own over home, text me when you get home, which is a really sweet gesture from the guy. Two thirds of the time when the girl gets home, she takes up for makeup and she forgets. And the guy's left. And then he might text just making sure you got home and

half the girls like stalker. I just left you. No, yeah, yeah, yeah, I do always forget. Even my girlfriend's like text when you get home. Girls forget. And then the second that used to be out my ear the second you said that. I don't remember. I know. And then he said, let's all hit you up next week and then he did and I just forgot until

this moment. Oh, yeah. So that's fine. And wow, it sounds very riveting. You're dating like a blind man. I know, what the hell? I was waiting for something juicy. Like, oh, I just went to some random orgy or something like that. I was trying to think I am going on.

It's so tame. No, no, no, no, no, I am going. No, I have fucked. I'm sorry, that was. You're disappointing me. Dude, I've been busy. I mean, trying to think what else, you know, there's a lot of stuff. With your award season.

Yeah. My award season, exactly. Okay. Yeah. My award season exactly. Okay. Yeah. But my freaking, okay, we'll take that. Oh God, this other guy just texted me that I also got fixed up with. Do you remember Julia Allison from our reality?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh God. Okay, so, right. So she's trying to fix the up with somebody. And he keeps texting me and I talked to him once. And she said, he's really nice, he's great, I talked to him and I was like, and then I have a text on the back and she texted me and she was, don't ghost on him,

she was like, can't believe you're ghosting, it's really good, and then my friend, and I was like, you don't really need me. Julia only knows guys from Burning Man. She's like, right. Oh, I know, I mean, but she hangs out with some suitors with large awake accounts, I want it. That's true. I want it like.

You know me, I share about large baby in the back. She's full time, she's full time. She's full Yeah, I want it. That's true. I want it like you know me. I share about a lot of things. She's full time. She's full time. But the other thing I have to say we'll get back to that. We've got lots going on here is that we okay enough my goddamn boring day in life but it's not that bad. I'm just starting up again because you know I broke up with someone. Yeah, right? We talked about this. Yeah, welcome back. Thank you. It's good. It's good. Right? We talked about this. Yeah. Welcome back. Thank you. It's good.

The only thing interesting is that I'm not even like thinking like I don't even like that's what you're asking. Like, oh yeah, date. Like I don't care. But we need to talk about our event. Yes. Brian is here because we're doing an amazing event that we just pulled together that is going to be probably the most exciting night of my life or at least a march.

Yeah. That seemed exciting. We're in February. Yeah. Exactly. And this ismys were in February, so we're going for March. Exactly. And this is the great, what's it called? I can't even, we're calling it love and sex live at the improv, at the Hollywood improv. I just don't know where everything is. Do you want me to explain the event?

Yeah, but I don't explain the internet or the event. Okay, yes, go and explain it. Well, at great love debate, we tour all over the country, do live interactive shows with about sex love dating relationships, all that kind of stuff. And Emily had great success with her 10th anniversary podcast show at the same venue. So I'm like, let's pull up. I'm the love. You're the sex. Put it together. Put a couple hundred people there. Some great guests. I love insects too. You're both love and sex. I'm both sex and love.

Yes. We got Dr. Drew coming and we are going to collectively hash out interactive town hall style men versus women, sex love dating relationships and everything that could possibly come up. Exactly. It's called love and sex live. Yep. But there won't be live sex people have been asking me that.

I mean, there could be. There's alcohol. Right. To drink minimum. And we've got a great panel. And we're just going to be walking around the audience talking to everyone about, you know, what, what? It's like group therapy with cocktails and it's fun and it really, it's a very open, honest

sharing environment, but it's also in a comedy club. So it gets really crazy. So we're going to be funny. We're also going to be very fun. And maybe naked. And it's March 10th at 730 at the Hollywood Improv, and they can get tickets at the Hollywood Improv. Great love debate.com. You can get them.

Yeah, it should be up to them. It's not sex with Emily.com. So you guys should buy some March 10th that we want to see there. And Menace might be there too. Yeah, we never know. We never know. It's not that late.

Menace doesn't do things with me. It's okay. We used to a lot. What? I'm over it. I've already let it go. It's not that late. Menaces don't do things with me. It's okay. I'm used to a lot. I'm over it. I've already let it go. He's doing something with you right now. He's three feet away. Hello. I know. What's going on with you? Anything new? Um, just working on Stop Constelly on the Woody Show. The Daily Podcast. The Woody Show. I'm going to do the Woody Show as my second show now too. Yeah. You want to?

I thought we'd really good energy. Yeah, no, super fun having you there. And then it's music festival season again, always Coachella. I'm going to join with Coachella. Yeah, so I'll be there and I don't know, a bunch of festivals coming up. Do you do stage coach? I don't do stage coach, but I heard it's freaking awesome.

Yeah, people love stage coach. I heard the women are comfortable. It's the country Coachella. I love country. Yeah heard it's freaking awesome. Yeah people love stage coach. I heard the women's the country Coachella Yeah, I love country. Yeah, it's the same they have big time acts and the women are yeah, and everyone's down Just the party and have a good time Coachella is like Could be very snobby Coachella's a little bit about the scene stage coaches about the fun. Yeah, I love to check it out But I'm not I just feel like every guy should go again Yeah, I'm like Burning Man, but I should go again. Kind of like Burning Man.

But I did go 10 years ago, also, to Burning Man. I'm done. Am I, are you done? It's bigger, better. I don't know. Not better. People who go, whose opinion I trust, really do swear by it.

My friends also go. All my San Francisco friends go. But, you know, whatever. It's a lot of work. It's a lot of work. I can really do a sleepover at the house. I know. I need a shower. Is Paul on the phone?

I'm so excited. Here's the phone. He's an Emmy and P-Body award-winning comedian. And he's won multiple Emmys, the daily show with John Stewart, NBD. Currently works on the late show with Stephen Cobair. He's awesome. And he has a new podcast.

It's been around for a while, but he's relaunching it again. It's called Two Chairs and a Microphone on the Adam Corolla Network. And I can tell you when I was on his podcast that we talked a lot about sex obviously, but I think I made him a little uncomfortable. Oh really? Is this podcast?

But he should have known. Was this podcast about? His podcast, I mean, he had Paul McCartney on his podcast. I mean, he's got. So it's an interview podcast. It's an interview podcast. It's an interview podcast. It's Tuture and a Microphone. Tuture and a Microphone.

I'm getting it. And he just interviewed a lot of like fascinating people on his podcast that... About their life and things like that. Yep. He has Stephen Colbert, Chris Chenoweth, Adam Corolla, John Apatow, Sugar Ray Leonard, Jay Leno. Let's talk to Paul Macario.

Hi Paul, thanks for calling in. Yeah, absolutely, how you guys doing? We're doing well. I'm here with a menace, my co-host, and Brian Howie from the Great Love Debate podcast, and we were just talking about you. Yeah, when I, when, yeah, I, I, I wasn't, you wouldn't make me uncomfortable.

I was just like, we, I like, I, I, the, the, the, the, everything else. I, I, just, just, just, cool. Like, you, you, you really like educate me, you know? I know, I'm glad. No, I know. I don't think you were on comfort because you knew I was thinking about how we met Paul that we both went to

barbecue with Dr. Drew's house. It was like a Sunday afternoon and you were there before I got there and he shows up and I think you brought cookies and stuff and then I showed up and I brought like a bunch of sex toys and I never met Paul. I'm like, here you guys go. You're the sex toys. They were out of potato salad. Exactly. I'm like, but here's

toys and pauses and like, look at this one. You can stick with like a wee vibe for the cute stick this then. And he even knowing that about me, Paul still had me on this podcast. Great. And then we were talking about a lot of conversations about anal, which was good. I did. Typical barbecue fair. Yeah don't do it. My wife's not really into it and then whatever. Emily's a tracker. It's kind of hard. You start talking to Emily about the stuff and then you're like, oh my god. And then you need to pull water on myself. Somebody on Twitter actually said, we were tweeting back and forth about the episode you remember that you responded to a guy that said something like

it's a hard to or difficult like to to do that kind of conversation with someone's attractive and i go absolutely to and then you said something about what you can't be a tracker and be a sex ever is like no it's great but like it's hard you know really i think it's easier when they're attractive well i don't think that was like that i don't really don't want to be talking about sex stuff with you because i you know right i find you revolting but you know yeah well i think you know there is something to

do that because i live well when i quit i quit you know lawyer to be a comedian and i moved to a looming house just outside of New York city and it was like this halfway house for all these dysfunctional people. And one of them was a 300-pound phone sex operator who showed verbal life diet products door to door. And I could hear all her calls. So the person on the other hand, she would describe herself as like, you know, 100 pounds, 105 pounds and like, you know, 5-8 glue eyes and I used to 300 pounds. So I know what the person looks like we say what you say it and

it was like uh... i would like i would really have to walk around outside what you get recalled so i didn't have to hear them it was unbelievably like gross but that's why that's why i agree with you like you know the person looks like it's crazy hard but but i really you know she's one and they didn't

were talking about the stuff and she put that power that i brought all krymon his hand by down comfort you said you're married right he's married i didn't know that i'm not well why would you call for a product line called down at a comfort but why put it on your head will that to show him the the how it turns

it feels amazing it feels amazing it's amazing i think that that's it can't you put it on your head? Well, to show him how it turns to my shoulder feels amazing. It feels amazing. That passenger can't you put it on my ball. No, I'm like, all right, well, that's an fun interview at all. I'm surprised. Paul, I don't even get it on my hand here. I'm sorry, I didn't bring you some. I have some on my car.

Nothing. All right. Yeah, and she had, we were sitting outside Dr. Drew's patio. And then all of a sudden like we're talking about these like I don't know finger vibrators, the brain, I don't like and I'm like wow this is my chocolate chip cookies really stuck compared to this. Those were really good cookies you bought but I did bring the Wevibe Honeymoon Kit which is this toy that has an anal thing and needs for clitoral stimulation and G-spot.

Yeah, I was a too strong thing and I'm like, it's like a seven layer down. It's an amylase equivalent of a seven layer. Yeah, why would you be bringing this to a barbecue? I know you don't cook, but G-s like go to Whole Foods or something. I know, well because I know you're plenty of food. I've always got the food, cake, cake, and caravan. I wanted to show new toys because I get really, really excited about it.

So, guys, honestly, she pulls this thing out, right? And it's just too fun. It looks like it came out of Star Wars or something. And I'm sitting there thinking, well, maybe they could roll up my chocolate chips and put that in their ass. So, I don't know. Like, there was no way my gifts could compare to that.

Like, it was pretty, and then you can recharge it, right? Like, you stick it in a cup. Yeah, I think like Susan was like, I'll go charge it. Like her iPod. Exactly. No, it's very exciting. Now then you can recharge it right like you stick it in a hot yeah i think like you like i'll charge it like your ipod exactly now it's very exciting but we talked about that because you hadn't used toys before you said really with your wife we don't use any toys we don't use any toys we don't use it we use a little move jail one time couple times our life and like a tragedy and with the wife one time

didn't like it make me a shouldn't duct tape there but uh... now uh... we now she didn't like it. Maybe I shouldn't have duct taped her, but no. No, she doesn't like it, so we don't do it. That's okay, but hey, we just talked about some of the options I think during the podcast, which I loved being a guest on it. We're pretty neat potatoes, kind of. I do like to have ESPN on TV on it, and then I mute it for light in the room. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Well, I mean, you could also use candles, let's just say,

you know, little atmosphere for candles. Did I give you a massage candle as well? I gotta send you a package. Should I need to send you some more toys in a package? But okay, let's talk about your podcast, two chairs and a microphone. So who's coming? I know you had Paul McCartney on the show,

which I keep trying to get a hold of him. You know, we're trying to get a date for him to be on my show and it hasn't happened. I'm just wondering how the hell you put that off well he told me that you call them but that you are key to the came to ball cream and that's it no way he would come on unless you put the ball cream on his ball that's what he said to me really I want to tell you that now but tell me about that

so i we um... i was working on the colbert report and uh... what happened once he was there doing like a special show uh... promote like that tool he was doing you know that we've said uh... he just a reverse and the loading on the center walking to the whole way and it's called the car and you stand all on the hallway we're against the wall like he's waiting for a bus to just walk up the ceiling to him down the new is all along like

that's a thing that's really more than anything else. He didn't have a handler or anything with him, which just came alone. So my whole world shows down. I'm like, over here, I'm a little bit better than him. And then, do I say hi? Do I not say hi? And you know, you've all been around like celebrities.

And usually I just leave him alone, whatever. You don't want to be that guy. I'm like, he's Tom McCartney. I go like, you know, say hi. So I go over, I figure I just sit high and I walk away, and I and she has had a big fan, he goes to her name, I go, Paul, he goes, oh, Paul, that's a good name.

And I'm starting to do him, I stand up, oh, were you doing, I'm traveling, we start to, to five times, we're talking about touring and kids, and nobody's coming over to me. Like I'm waiting for somebody to take me to the pub. Right, three in jail, right? Something, yeah. And on the outside me like i'm waiting for somebody to pay to right three-year-old something here and on the outside like i'm also the hit by my dad and i'm talking about but i'm inside

i'm like oh my god but i thought i was like one of those girls you see it like in the old films right and by the way i was becoming like the creepy close talker guy oh god we need because he looks amazing he said in three, but he he looks like he's just in the beginning and the reading and he kept like weaning back and I'm like, you know what I got to leave this guy low. So I read and I go into the bedroom and I'm like, hyperventually. And I literally I call my wife and I'm like, you're not going to

boo and she thought it was, you know, she thought I was beating off in the bedroom, check them. She was, what are you doing? I'm like, I just talk to my mom, I'm going to the non-delusional and i say issue my podcast that's what i think you're good right so i go and i know i can't do or in the judge and doorky hey um... i don't see crazy but we can do my podcast and he goes yeah sure just like that

like just like that did you do right there oh no what happened was almost in happened because he threw me like i didn't have any plan i know i was going to do really think you know i have to have a little guy i have a point like all i have to route she's way but my pay great i'll get it out of my system and i'll know i have to say no such as yes you don't have a plan yeah that was me

because how do we do it and i literally am like uh... uh... i'll come to one day why would you come to one of the new york and then he goes is it easy to do and i actually said to the most important musician the last century of yet it's really easy i want to be about it you can do it on your phone make it from your toilet i'm like what am i saying

you're doing that so we got it still said yes super flushed out you know that's what you're in this yet so uh... i end up You're a comedian now, so we got it. He still said yes. Super flustered. You know, you can start even hearing this. Yeah. So, um, I end up, uh, saying, look, I'm going to leave you alone. I go talk to your assistant and we'll get it set up. And she's like, he goes, he goes, no, no, no, he goes, he goes, um, you know, I'm not going to get off because you and I'll do it. Like, it would even go, they'll screw it up. Just let's exchange numbers.

I love this. But now I'm giving my phone number to Paul McCartney. And it was the most surreal, like, so I leave. I think I have the nicest blow up on the face of the planet. We do the show and we take the daily show, which I was also working on at the time, like two blocks from that show. So I had to leave the co-bearers' shows

or the daily show. I'm getting my backpack together stuff because I'm running late. I got the phone rings. I don't recognize the number. It rings the voice mail. And I'm going to play this message for you right now. Here it is. I bought a public army here. I'll be right back in five minutes to do the podcast thing. I got some time now. Otherwise I'm going to run out of time. So if you're there and five minutes time do podcasting. I've got some time now. Otherwise, I'm gonna run out of time. So if you're there and five minutes time, you got me. Okay, bye. Okay, Apple call McCartney leaving me a voicemail.

Okay, love it, I love it. It's crazy, right? So now I hear that. And I realize I just scream the call from home McCartney. I'm never gonna get him back and I start screaming in the street I just scream the call from home a carton you know we're going to get them back and I start screaming in the street where I get the call I retrieve the message on the street. I'm like, God, God, no, I'm screaming and then I call them back and they say, hold on a second, he's in the bathroom and then I have to pick her in the bathroom and then he did it.

He got on the phone and we did the interview. That's amazing. And they can hear. Yeah, that's the thing. The very, very top, top stars, they can make their own decisions. Right. It's when you get into that next level where even if they say yes, their management, their publicists, everything get involved.

And it usually doesn't happen. Poma Gardening can do whatever you want. Yeah, exactly. I love that. So it ended up being great. And people can find all your podcasts, what's the best place for people to do? Well, I'm on the article on the article whenever

single-year or even use you just go to my website call curio dot com you know yeah but we'll have a small website too you know i think i think yeah it's a really cool conversation just about you know like that what i think i don't talk to anyone about, I didn't talk to them like I was a fan. I just talked to a guy about music because I really like, you're asking really what, it was a good question like, what's my podcast about?

I think I like to ask people about their process and like, how they do what they do and why they do what they do and I'm just, I have a lot of, so I have intentionally, I have like a wide array of guests, like, that's not just all comedians and you know the gross Tyson Emily like we really covered again it so and I asked them I said like you know when you're a performer you kind of know what your fans like I said where did you get the guts to keep changing your sounds so dramatically from like one album to the next and not worry about losing your fans and he goes like no we never thought of that but those those we just did what we were passionate about and we hope people would come along. I'm like, so was a real conversation

just about making music. It wasn't about all the pittillating stuff about the eight-yoko and all the sort of stuff. Exactly, no, I find that much more interesting. When you're being amazing artists just to hear, I love hearing about the process. The one question I wanted to ask because I didn't have the ball school is,

hey, here be a why would you marry a woman with one leg? That's all I'm saying. I'm just curious about that. Maybe he'll get a seconder exactly. He thinks on a deeper level than the last of us. But I'm sure. All you need is love. I'm sure you did a great one. And lots of great people on your pet. We already read the list of all the people on your pet. But they can check it out two chairs and a microphone and you got me on on my podcast. Is this not happening yet next time you're in town? Yes, I'm looking at possibly coming in in the next few weeks, so I'll let you know. Okay, you better hit me up, Paul.

I'm excited. I will, and I can. I get the ball cream ready. Okay, no, I got it, dude, I got the ball cream. This time we're really gonna apply the ball cream. But congrats on everything, and the new The Late Show with Stephen Cobraire and all your success, and I will see you soon.

Yeah, thanks. Okay, thanks. Paul have a great day. Bye. Take care. Take care, guys. Thank you. Cool. Cool. He's a good guy. We had a fun as podcast. I think I did embarrass him now. I'm sure you did. I used these toys and he's like, I'm trying this one. Whatever. I know. I'll just getting somebody for the first time that has a bunch of toys So I think you I didn't have a share they were like come to barbecue. I was like I might do the invite Emily to the Christmas No, I didn't know it was a thing. I said it was his family everyone in the juice family knows about like bring toys It's fine. Okay, so imagine meeting

Somebody's family, too, you're like oh, this is Emily. We've already heard my story Yeah, poor story when they Google me. Like, that's the worst. Like, oh, my dad Googled you and it's, yeah. Now my dad is a huge fan and he listens to the podcast. I know. But if your mother's fine, everybody's mother's fine. Yeah, exactly. My mom's cool.

She's like, I'm glad I can pay my rent. So that's all she cares about. OK. But first, before we get back into all the dating stuff, I need to talk to you about the rave. Not like a rave part. This thing is such like a party in your pants. You know, I love weave-ibes, famous couples toys and they're super powered bullet vibes, which is like the one I gave to Julia. I was telling you, which is why I'm so excited to introduce the incredible rave. First glance, the rave appears to be simple,

sculptural vibrator, but when you look closer, you'll see an array of facets and asymmetrical curves that make it so special. The rave was designed with one primary goal, to have women locate and stimulate their juice butt. Once inserted, a gentle twist in either direction will glide the rave's varied angles and faces over your most sensitive areas. And it allows you this precise control and pinpoint stimulation. Pretty soon you'll find your G spot

and know exactly how to make it happen. It's hard for some people to find their G spot. We've talked about this, man. Yeah, make it out. We're gonna do an app called the G spot locator. So we don't need to anymore because this will find your G spot. All right, good. It's it's it's It has all these vibration patterns. It's rechargeable, 100% spotty safe materials. And you can use their WeVib Connect app. So if you're in a relationship with someone, they can vibe you.

If you're not even in the same room, if you're in a different country, it doesn't matter. It's the coolest. We've all found our G-Spots in the office like time and time again, because we've such a good time with it. So, oh, and we have a video about it.

You can check it out at our YouTube channel. It's the rave. So go to sextoemey.com, click on the rave by we by banner and use code Emily for a special, very special discount. All right, so Brian, great love debate. If you haven't, our podcast was very fun a few weeks ago. We did it, right? Yeah, oh my god, just our great love debate podcast.

We have gotten more people listening to our show because they heard me on your show. So we've had all these sex with Emily, fans listening to us and email us. I love that. Yes, yeah, it was great. That's exciting, because we had a really good time. So it's kind of popular, Emily, on the internet.

On the internet. And on the other web, and on the internet. Outside your photos. And in your restaurant staff. Well, it's weird because here's the other thing. Why was bringing that up is like, I'm like, oh, this happened. It happens sometimes, but the thing I'm realizing lately is with

my voice too. I could just be talking and they recognize your voice. So it's like, you can't, you know, go, yeah, I gotta be quiet. Because I also talk really, really loud. As you know, it travels mad. And it's when you keep Madison came down the office of

the other day and you could the entire building was rewriting from my phone call. Okay, Brian, so you, they don't know so great, love debate, you've been done 100 plus shows. 126 shows in 78 cities live. And we, yeah, that's amazing. And we covered a lot of this on the last show and we talked about the environment. So today I thought that we would just talk about some of the things we had a very interesting lunch together where we talked kind of about the show, but I learned more about all the stuff

like the common threads that you found about how he will dating, and how it's so different in different parts of the country. It's different in parts of the country. And people get into like a- One thing- People are a lot nicer in the Midwest. They are more hopeful in whatever.

And one of the things that came up at our show in New York, we had a live show in New York a couple weeks ago, was yeah, one of the things that came up that are are showing New York We had a live show in New York a couple weeks ago Was that a lot of the women were complaining that when they go on dates the men just want to talk about themselves And so I made the point that when a when a man is nervous He talks more and when a woman is nervous she talks less and that leads to a screwed up balance on first dates Where the men is if he's talking a lot, he's probably really flattering in a way.

It's almost that he's nervous to be around you and sometimes the women interpret that, like he just wanted to talk about himself all night. And really, your job sort of would overcome that is say something, ask something, do something. He wants to hear from you. He's just in his own head and babbling. No, I know, I know that.

I give you men the best. There's a circle of life. Nothing can ever just go together. Like what they said, the percentages, men love morning sex way more than evening sex, and women love evening sex way more than morning sex. Dude, that's just the tip of the iceberg. Well, because you have morning sex to him,

it feels more like a release. Yeah, at the end of the day, it's just the tip of the iceberg. Well, because you have morning sets to him, it feels more like a release and hurt the end of the day. It's more romantic. Right. Now, it's all really confusing. I mean, it's all, yeah, we don't match easily. At all. What the hell? I know.

That's how we just need really good friends as well. And we need a tribe. We need a whole community. Well, even on your date, he probably interprets that it went well. Mm-hmm, because I kissed well. Because I kissed him. Because you kissed him. That's a pretty good sign.

If you kiss us, we think at least you think we're not gross. And you kissed you twice. Okay? And so then when he texts you and you kind of ghosted him for a couple days, that's where you know, the man is looking for any little sign of validation early on in the relationship. It was like a day and a half, two days, and I said, hey, yeah, that'd be fun. And I would go out with him. I see the thing is, I truly like dating. Like, I enjoy the process of, like, I think he's really interesting.

Like, I look at it like he's someone he, I could be friends with and he's super smart. Like, I can't, I mean, everything about him, I thought was interesting. Culturally, like, what we talked about, the whole thing. You want to track it to him? I tried. I tried some times. I really did. I really did.

What does try mean more wine? More wine? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was really good wine. But yeah, I was attracted, but not enough. But the truth is, yeah, I did. But then I did text him back, and then I'll just sort of pilot it, fade. But I would have dinner with it.

He was, if there's a fun part, I'd go to a dinner party with some of his friends. He's like, we do these dinner parties once a month. Like I think, I don't look at it as like, it could be in your friend, like as a waste of time, right? You know, that's the thing. You never know who that person knows, and you never know who they're one degree with.

So everybody has value. Unless there's somebody who's really painful for you to be around, or it's something that you really didn't get along Keeping them sort of in your life on a friendship basis has huge value I am menist as menist likes to often point out that I am friends with all of my taxes. Oh, they go on vacations together with their new girlfriends and wives All good. Do they do they still hit on you? No.

Do you cuddle? Totally. No. Do they rub your feet? It's like where it's worse. It's like, what do you do? No, no, no, no. That one I, well, we know.

We don't have that. That was the least sure. No, I know. I don't feel sorry. I don't feel sorry for ever, but no. Don't believe me. I'm not sure, but then I was with my boyfriend at the time and they were their new girlfriend. But that's one of like many times you hang out.

I feel weird being at a wedding where I've had sex with the bride. I never thought you had any of those. Right. Because my penis was inside the bride. Yeah, I feel uncomfortable. And I shouldn't because she invited me and must be good. And part of me is too much of a jerk. Like, still like I had her first.

I've been invited to baby showers, and I'm all like, no, not going to that either. Really? No. I think it's like, even I don't know any of the guys, I still think it's like disrespectful. If I was in that situation, I wouldn't want any other. Yeah, I wouldn't want my bride to be

his ex-boyfriend there at all. But I'm in love with this. I never got married then. That was my role. There'd be nobody in my world. That's how you know. There'd be no man in my wedding. I've slept with all my guy friends.

Me and you, who both of us have yet to marry, both of us, even putting any sort of parameters on our wedding sounds for posters. We took exactly, do we? Right. My mom's always like, even putting any sort of parameters on our wedding sounds for posters. We talk exactly, right. And mom's always like, does we only go on the aisle when you get married? But here's a question for you, on your dates. When you go out, so, because I've been thinking about this a lot lately too, because we are,

you know, in our 40s, never been married. And so, I don't, like, my first dates typically go like this. I don't know if we talk about this in your show, but this is exactly how it goes down on that. I'm curious if they're like, so have you ever married? I say no. Okay, have you ever lived with anyone? No. What's your longest relationship?

Oh, you know, about two and a half years, three years. Okay. Did you have you ever been close to getting married? I'm like, no. Well, because they know I don't want to get married. No, that's what it comes at. And they're like, okay, I think literally it's that rapid fire every single day. That's how the first like five minutes goes.

I'm like, okay, like make your decision. And I think they have every right to ask that. Me too. And my answers aren't necessarily better. Have you ever been married? No. Have you ever lived with some? Yeah, a few times.

Have you ever long-term relationships? Yeah, lots. That's worse. That means you're almost, because I've had a four year, five year, six year relationships. And they're like, so you were willing to, you know, put most of your chips in,

but not all your chips that you sort of, and I used to make the joke, and it wasn't really the joke that the resume I handed in was for boyfriend. And that was a different skill set. And that is the job that I wanted. And I really liked dating. And to go to that scary vulnerable,

we're gonna buy a house and have kids together. Thing, I didn't feel confident that this was the one. I wanted to do it once and do it right. So if I took me to do it in my 40s, or maybe it'll take my 50s or whatever, so be it. Right. And do you think that there is, though, because I remember always hearing about like,

in my 30s, we'll go, oh, we'd be wherever guys, like in his 40s, never in my, but I'm that girl now too. Like is it worse to be a, what do you think the society, like, is the judge around men and women? A woman, I, it's worse, like what's wrong with her? Yeah, well, she's not, I don't think about what people think.

I would judge it, I would, not judge it, but I would think that you would have to own your answer. You can't just be like, I was busy with other things or whatever. No, I say by choice, like why are you in your mirror? I'm like, by choice. But by choice is not good enough for most people. Okay, well, I will expand upon that. I'll say it really wasn't a goal of mine. I've had a lot of things that I've been focusing on in my life and marriage and family was never wrong. Right. So if you say, I wasn't really that interested in having having kids so I didn't really see the point until I was ready.

That's a reasonable answer and a lot of that is my answer too. I wasn't my parents didn't seem to enjoy having kids that much. So you're all really having a best thing. You know that's sort of in the 30s there's this mad rush to it's almost you know sometimes women treat it like a game musical chairs and I better grab a seat for the music stops. And then the women in their 40s, sort of that pressure is off. It's a different type of dating because you're, you know, you're a dating then for reasons to look for love, but a little bit the women get in their 40s and she's really comfortable

in her own way. Well, that's the other thing the older you get. My mom always said this, like you get older, you get like the more set in the ways, more set in your ways, the more you become. So whatever your issues are, whoever you are, you become more of that. Well, we talked about that, like what I think the biggest challenge of dating

in Los Angeles is, the quality of life because of the weather is so nice. Why do I want to get involved in something like dating? And it takes a lot of people out of the pool because they're like, I have my dog and my wine and my yoga class and my friends and whatever. And the prospect of bringing a uncomfortable dating situation into that is an issue for Los Angeles.

And Cleveland, you want a distraction from the cold. Right. You want to sit inside and cover it. So you think that people aren't really, I mean, I hadn't heard that before. Man, what do you think about that? That people here aren't as focused on dating because life is pretty good. It's warm, we've got our friends, right?

You know? No, it's something that I just brought up on the show before, any female friends of mine that live here. They said that at least the guys that they're dating are never focused on the relationship because they're never doing what they want to do. Like, so they're the guy that,'re dating are never focused on the relationship because they're never doing what they want to do. So they're the guy that, let's say, is stereotypical actor or something like that.

So he's working a day job, but all his free time is being taken up because he wants to be the actor. Right. But that's again your book. Well, I mean, we've been to 78 cities in North America and the ones that have weather issues The Midwest Canada the Northeast Dating is a much higher thing to do on the list of priorities and here It's a little too. I'm just gonna go about my day and it's not it's nice

No weather and it's and even in the South it's a little bit we got Austin we got a Phoenix Whatever it's sort of like a little bit more like hanging out for fun and guys and girls are together, but the actual like, let's go out to dinner and go on dates is less frequent in places that have temperate climates. Yeah, but even if it goes freezing and people are still like casually not really dating, not asking for the date. Yeah, but I also, it doesn't seem like every... My friends in other states,

their free time is all hanging out in a group and just mingling with each other or whatever. And then here's like everyone's so busy. Like my best friend from high school, I've mentioned this before, lives like 45 minutes away and I've seen him one time since I've been here. I know, you know?

I know it's hard, I like that. It is, it's a traffic thing, but the other thing that's become an issue everywhere is they date, meant, it used to mean, I pick you up and I take you out. Because the women do not want any part of getting picked up now, it's we're gonna meet out two cars, two ubers or whatever.

It leads to this hangout kind of culture. And you know, the women don't like that. They're like, all the guys just want to hang out. Well, to defend the guys a little bit, you've taken away the pickup drive me home specialness of the first couple encounters. So it is sort of meet up hangout where you're going after this. Yeah, you don't get that intimacy when the door closes and you're in their car for the first time. You really don't really get a car or coming to my house knocking on the door The opportunity for him to show up with flowers and candy and champagne like you used to have to do is gone It is gone. You're right. It's a lot less pressure though, too for the guy

It's a little less pressure But at least there was a bar he could meet you know, at least there was something like I know I need to do this right? versus. Oh is that her? Hey. Right. Yeah, so. So, yeah, that's fun. You know, so the definition of what a date is has changed. That's true.

I kind of like it though. I like having my freedom because I don't want that pressure that he has to drive me home, although this happened there night and I did kiss him, but that was fine. Yeah, the worst thing. You know, I'm from, I'm from New York originally. The worst thing you can hear on a date in New York is the girl to say two stops please

Okay, wait, wait, I want to ask them so after visiting all these cities which one you think has been the coolest just then Like easiest to talk to one comes to people Charlotte North Carolina and And it's funny. You say that. Why? Because I know some people from from there and they're super easy to talk to. People move there every day. Yeah. They're from all over the place. It's vibrant. The community's great. Put it this way. They they have a bar crawl there that a couple of friends of mine run on St. Patrick's Day. 21,000 people will do a bar crawl. Oh my gosh. So fine. For St. Patrick's Day. It is a fun environment city.

People move in there of day. It's it's in fine. For say, Patrick Stey, it is a fun, environment city people moving there. It's in the south without being too southern. It's great. Yeah. North Carolina is booming. I'm actually gonna go there next February. Long time from now. You already know.

Because they have the All Star Bestball game. Yeah. So right there. So we're right there. Fooked to go there. Good for you. You just check it out. So I'm gonna check it out for the first time.

Okay, I've never been. I have a question for you. We talked about this too. A lot of women and men complain that it's easy to get the first date, but it's so hard to get the second. What do you think goes wrong on these first dates? I think on the first dates, the lack of communication on both parts. A lot of times, if a guy is going out with a girl

once, almost without exception, he wants to go out with her again. She could be crazy, bitchy, terrible person on the first day. He still probably wants to see her again. She is looking for a lot of reasons not to go out again. She's the one who's like, how do I get out of this after 10 minutes? I always say, you know, the women look for red flags, the men look for green lights. Even if it goes well, a lot of times I hear the woman say, I don't understand, I laughed, I touched his arm, I said, thank you, and he didn't call me. And I said, did you say thank you? I would like to do it again.

And they're like, no, he could tell. He can't tell. But you think that he didn't, so really like he did not call because he didn't get any feedback in the first, in the first date. He asks you out. He complements you He pays for you. He's doing a lot and at the most maybe he's getting back Thank you. Well if you had a bad time you would say thank you as well. So that's not a thank you right good or bad So he needs to hear from you. That's a lot of times why he makes a move. I would love to do it again

That's why he doesn't want to do it again. I would never leave him. He almost wants to. I disagree though. You're telling me he's a guy. He wants to do it again. The only reason the guy doesn't ask you on a second date is because he wasn't sure if you want to. What if I really know it?

No, that's not the only reason. What if I was in my phone? What if I ate right? No problem. There would be a million reasons. I would have the lobster right there. I'd feel like I'm feeling ill. There would be a million reasons.

Right. If you did that, if you talked on your phone the whole time, that's just sending him signals that I don't like you. You know, you're disinterest in you all that, it's feedback. What if I was just really annoying? Really annoying? Which I didn't even have really,

I can't imagine that, but really annoying, really pretty, we'll cancel out really annoying, and really, Really pretty canceled everything for a while. If you would say though, oh my god, this was so much fun, I can't wait to do it again. He will almost always go out with you again.

Only if he only for the reason that he might want a little return on his investment, he just bought you that lobster. And you know, he's not going to say, he says that you believe him, but when I say, you think I'm full of shit. What did we say? What? F. What?

You always say the same thing. What did he say? He even said that way. I know that's what I'm saying. He says it in a more articulate way. What do you say that every man's gonna say yes again? Of course. I just don't know what- Even what, unless you are like, women-

Frinking out of your mind. Women misinterpret even his desire to have sex early on. They think that- No, we don't. Yeah, he does want to, but it's not necessarily a primal thing. A lot of times it's, if she had sex with me, she must not think I'm gross, she must like me or whatever. So if the woman says, and I think I said this other day,

if you say to the guy, listen, it's going to take me a while to get comfortable, but when I do, I'll blow your mind. He will forget about it's going to take a while, and he'll hear, blow your mind, and he will wait months and months and months and he's very comfortable with that because he knows it's a possibility down the end of the road. What they don't want to hear is I don't really have sex very quickly or or you they don't want to hear like you know I'm not gonna sleep with you. You know how many times I've heard that and then that night. Yeah that happens. I do that but if you're like

I'm not gonna sleep with you, you're really just telling him, this isn't a possibility. You have to dangle a possibility, not a reward. I'm not a reward. And I want another lobster. It's not about the possibility that I need to feel comfortable.

It's the possibility that when I feel comfortable, it's going to be very sexual. Right. And they can imagine that in their heads, and then they will table that. Okay. And one more thing. Yes, there's many. What have I been saying for years? And they can imagine that in their heads and then they will table that okay and One more thing yes, there's what have I been saying for years women just need to be slightly more aggressive

Not aggressive how not where they come on too strong just this because again guys can't even read if you like them or not, you know I think I have to give them more size and I think I think I. I think I like them. Do you compliment a man? This is verbally. Yeah, I do. Our next topic was compliment. So menace for years, you've been talking about this. And it's a debate. And I like, I love compliments. I love receiving them.

I love giving them. I'm a natural giver of compliments. See, like, I don't ever stop and think, we should write an awkwardment compliment. And I'm like, oh, you look great, please. For men and women. Has she complimented you today, men? I haven't gotten it.

Um, I don't know. I don't really pay attention. But days before the show, I'm sure, we have time, but I'm sure she did, though. I mean, she is very good about that and she does compliment people a lot. Right, exactly. And so I always give, I just do.

I'm like, and also I've like, I require them in a relationship. It feels very affirming. If you've got, you know, we put a lot of effort into things. Like, just tell me, I look do. And also I've like, I require them. And in a relationship, it feels very affirming. If you got, you know, we put a lot of effort into things. Like, just tell me, I look prettier. Nice. You know, I'm going to hear it. And I used to joke, I'm like 10 times a day.

10 things, and I was like, 10 compliments a day. And I was like, I think 10 is being light. I think she was saying about like, 21. No, but even just one or two, and managed to like, no. You know, because then she's going to know that you're really like her, and she's really hot, sure, and you know, she's hot, and I don't need to compliment her. That was your whole thing.

Correct? Yeah, a lot of it was like a 10 is pretty excessive. And then you also, you just become. You're turning the point. You gotta, you need to vary your compliments. Right. You see, God, you're so hot 10 times, that's gonna be a bit.

But you could pick, you could talk about her outfit, which shows her style, which shows her personality. You could say, oh my God, the way you reflect your eyes and that background looks really good I love what you do with your hair today. You need to be creative with the compliments and notice things You know, I you know the difference between creepy and a compliment is who's giving it But the creativity can overcome a lot of the creepy and if you are creative and you are interesting And it is the first time she has ever heard something said that particular way, it's gonna be memorable

and it's gonna make an impression on it. Yeah, and we're all a satire in a relationship. I would say maybe that could happen once a week or something like that. And most of the time. You tell her at her, you know, the most beautiful time for any woman is usually when she's caught off-guard and kind of that sleepy half-light at 8 a.m. You know, that's the way we see her. Because it's a three-dimensional image of her. It's more than a picture, more of the selfie.

If you tell her she looks pretty at a time when she probably isn't expecting it, or maybe she doesn't think she looks so good, that has- Yeah, like in the morning when I know I don expecting it, or maybe she doesn't think she looks so good. Yeah, like in the morning, when I know, I don't look very good maybe. When she's all dolled up, she knows she looks good. She probably told herself she looked good before she came out of the bathroom. But if she's sitting there just like,

cooking bacon and a robe, and that's not gonna be like, you look great because she probably does look great. You know, and she was like, but that doesn't answer the question. The question was, so you're, are you just saying, okay, there's no, no number on it per day per week or I don't think it's like, if that happens, what you just talk about in the kitchen or whatever happens

to a bunch from now, that's when I do it or because Emily's like putting down a number each day amount. I'm not saying three on Tuesday. But nobody wanted every day, right? It's kind of nice every day. Hey, you look nice. You look great. I love it. I love it when you think.

Well, it should be at least once a day, but every compliment should be different. It's like a snowflake. It should be like come up with a different way to say it and you'd be surprised at how you will notice things about her when you're sort of like a project. Yeah, it is. I'm going to tell her in a new way how beautiful I think it is. Yeah, it's exactly and it's not because my ego needs it so but it's not even about that. I mean, it's a part of it.

Don't get me wrong. Don't get me wrong. But it is just about like, you know words, words of affirmation. Right. She knows she's hot. But she doesn't know that you're noticing her or things about her things and that's because this guy Was ending recently even too. I said to him. I said what like is it? I know that you think I'm attractive But like if you just tears a thing even if you just see me and maybe you you know, you think it

Maybe you should just say it out loud rather than thinking like oh, I don't want to tell her because I don't know Why you don't tell me this was my conversation with them, But we were talking about, anyway, any still didn't, and we're not dating, but that's how it went. So, but Brian, you were also talking about, no, million other things, but Brian, you were talking about men getting needing and requiring compliments as well. And I always give compliments to men like all the time.

And I feel like most of them, the way men react to comments is like, oh, no, no, I feel like they don't even hear it. Like they don't need it in a minute. It's pretty rare. I don't know if I've heard to my face 100 times in my life that I was good looking or that somebody said I look good at it.

I think you're really handsome. Well then, it's 98. We're getting close to 100. Thank you. But it's so, we don't hear that from women. We might hear, and these have equal value. You look great. I love the way that shirt looks on you. You look good.

Or like little things that are positive affirmation. You know, if he shows up on a date wearing a Ben Rompless burger jersey, if you just said, rather than, oh my God, I can't believe you showed up, that you're like, you know, it would look great. I bet you look fantastic in a suit. And he will remember. I love men suit. And he will remember, okay, I know what she likes. So rather than smack him down about what he did wrong, telling what he needs to do right, he will step up. Right, it's valuable. Okay, let's get into the mean balance real quick.

All right. Okay, what were you gonna say? No, no, no. Again, I think that just goes back for women need to be more vocal. What do they need? What about your girlfriend? You feel like she's just chill.

Do you ever tell her things? Like, she's... What? Did I ever tell her anything? Like, what you love about her and what you appreciate about her. He's been a girlfriend for like 18 years. I've never met her. How's that possible?

How's that possible? He never tells me it's her and then it's the last story. I don't want to get into this. No, well, the first time I was just got weird because the day that worse story. No, no, no. Okay. Tell the story. So I was going to have her meter. So I had her at the radio station with me and Emily walks in and goes to her and says, hey, can you go grab me a water? Thinking that she was an intern at the radio station. Wasn't she? She was in.

Okay. And then I was like, that's kind of weird, but she's nice, so she went and got her water anyways. And then we would just got into the show. So I was just like, all right, well, forget it. You were having a real housewives and some kind of truth. That's the honest guy truth. That's exactly what happened and I would never you know

And she didn't get upset by that or anything but I just thought behind you you weren't she did work for you at the time Let's be honest and we had candy for the house guys there and she wanted water and I was like do you think you can get us Waters because I knew I thought she worked there and it wasn't just for me like getting you water and by the way Can you get me a you know Whatever and that just tells me like a week that I was my girlfriend I'm like I didn't know we need water we're thirsty okay so let's get in the house while you're the one that brought it up so I just told the story did she want to meet Emily I don't think she really cares yeah cares I don't care and I'm no. She's mainly Emily before and then we were like formally like

Oh, hey, I don't think you guys have really met like all so out go out for girls girl and a guy's girl She loving you and you're and you're a good influence on him. I think you are you're showering the burden for her She said me She's so, she's so, she's so much fun to be around. Totally ball cream. I go, Loub. You would, oh my God, you'd be so lucky to be with somebody like me. But the only thing is I couldn't put up with you because you just talk way too God damn much. I know. And it's family for you is the equivalent of the gay friend for the female.

And that's a good thing to have. It's just exhausting. It is. It's true. I've got to take care of Deltis. I know. That's why I good thing to have. It's just exhausting. It is, it's true. I'm not your mom. I got to take care of Dosis. No, that's my thing. Well, I love you to death. I don't do it, I don't wear it, I don't wear it in love.

Guys, guys, two days, yeah, they're cool with me talking. I don't always talk, sometimes I'm quiet. Sometimes in my sleep, I don't know, I do talk in my sleep. Do you talk in your sleep? Yeah, I'm sure, it just keeps on going. There's a lot going on over there again. Oh, I know, she's tough to turn it off. How do you keep Emily stimulated 24 Fing7?

I do not know. Emily does a good job of that. Yeah, that helps. She takes it 80% of the way. So you only have to really do 20% of the work. I'm the easiest person to have. It's easy to date Emily. Yeah, she walks around fairly turned on.

So you're doing, you know. And I've got the guys are just like, this is really good at smiling and nodding the whole time or what? Or do you, like, like listening, yeah, they're gay, like they are entertained.

Like you met the last guy, he was like, no, you said what? I was dating guy, he came in, I'd never had anyone on the show that I'd actually been with, slept with.

And you're like, how do you put up with talking? And he's like, I like it. I'm entertained. And he wasn't like, eventually it was burnt out, right? No, that's, no up with talking? And he's like, I like it, I'm entertained. And he wasn't like, you're the same. Eventually he was burnt out, right? No, that's not why. No.

I think he's polite. He goes to do because he was just like, Goddamn, I need a nap. That's not how it happened. She's entertaining. Who would it be? She's hot and entertaining. Look, how long have you known her?

She is. She's having some entertaining. I know, but there will be fatigue. And I'm not saying that I'm just saying at friendship wise Effing awesome love you death, but in a relationship wise I just don't know like how you can be a guy couldn't be fatigued after a while That's all and that's just me that's why I've been in who cares? Yeah, it's really pretty. That's why we're not together. Yeah, I know and I would find you exhausting as well

Because you've been your phone the whole time and not really paying attention to the one and the one who doesn't find her exhausting That's the one. Yeah, I know. And I would find you exhausting as well because you've been your phone the whole time and not really paying attention to the amount. And the one who doesn't find her exhausting, that's the one. Yeah, I know. She's not for everybody. We're on the hunt for that guy and one day it's going to be. We did not end because he found me exhausting. I will just tell you that. Okay, can we do one quick email? Okay, yes, please. Okay. Um, hi, I listened to your podcast every week. Last week you were talking about connecting in a relationship with sex and how important sex is. I'm a 50-year-old woman who's been divorced for 16 years and was in an abusive marriage. I've been very busy raising two kids alone so I never really dated and I guess I'm also scared to. My kids are now 25 and 21 so I have more time, more me time, but I feel it's too

late to start dating and yes it's been at least 14 years since I've had sex. How do I even start in this different world? Thanks. Emma. I think that's a really good one too for Brian to kind of, you know, jump in because I understand that she would be scared. First of all, everybody's scared. We're all scared. You know, a little bit, you get that a lot where it's a little bit different now. If somebody, you know, got divorced or at a relationship in 1985, the dating landscape was sort of the same as 1974. The difference now in 2016, if you dropped out in 2002, it's a whole different world.

That being said, what did she say? She has 52? Yeah. She's got about 40 years, probably, of dating left. So you don't have to jump back in. You don't have to do it. Start with spending time with people of the opposite sex. Start about going, start classes, volunteering, meet-up groups, things where you get comfortable

just having dialogue with men. Change of the routine. Change of the routine. And you be surprised at how comfortable you can get quickly, not necessarily jumping into a one-on-one situation. Right, exactly. It's like a muscle that you got to use too. It's almost a shift. We're coming out of abuse too. So I want her to get that again. She needs to get comfortable being around men and women again. And that the only way that's going to happen is to get out of the house. And that's where your answer is lie. Like sitting by the computer and trying to guess if some guy on match calm is going to also

be abusive. Don't do that. Get out, spend time. I always say the best dating site is earth. So go there and get out there and just start engaging with other people and get yourself comfortable with that. First.com, I heard that was a really good one.

Yeah, but we always say that you gotta change up your daily routine to meet you. Get out of your comfort zone. And then also another thing, I hope she has talked to somebody about the abuse stuff because sometimes you fall into the exact same person that you dated before. Right, we tend to often do that. And you don't want to do that, obviously.

Sometimes one, sometimes 25 times until you. Yeah, and you need to always be cognizant of it, but you can't also bring whatever the pain is from that forward into the next relationship. Because it's also not fair to that person. So you really have to process that healthy one. That's how I think that people often don't, and then they think it's just not fair to that person. So you really have to process that, you know, healthy one. That's how things work. I think that people often don't, and then they think it's just going to go away, but it stays with you for a lifetime, unless you deal with the...

Right, I've dated girls like that where I felt like I'm dealing with something that happened long before me. And they didn't know how to explain it, and I didn't know how to deal with it, and you went up, you know, fighting about it. Right, so you're going to work all this stuff out, which I have now, that's why I'm ready to date. It took me a while. Ready to be in a relationship. Like we do. Ready to be married.

We're ready. We're so good. Okay, do we have time for another, we do. Okay, dating in the tone of that. Okay, dating in the sex industry. Long time listener, ViTunes, and I've learned a lot from your podcast. I recently started a relationship with a girl

that I really like and could see a future with. However, she's involved in the sex industry, which is a situation I've learned a lot from your podcast. I recently started a relationship with a girl that I really like and could see a future with however she's involved in the sex industry, which is a situation I've never had to deal with before. I understand that what she does for work is different from what she does, what she does with me, but sometimes I feel a little bothered by her job. Do you have any advice on how I can deal with my feelings? She's not leaving the industry anytime soon. Is there something I can do for myself

to help me manage my feelings or is there a way to discuss this with her without hurting or angering her? Thanks, Johnny. I'm assuming she's a porn star. Well, I mean, the range here would be prostitute to you. You're the other right. Right.

So anything in the industry. I was a student. She was just just dancer stripper. That's right. I thought that too, but then we talked about in the office and Madison was saying that usually people would say stripper of stripper, but I think porn start, but I don't know. It doesn't matter either way. Yeah, or she can be a cam girl. True. She could be still. There's so many. I had a guest on our podcast. They Kate Quigley. She's comedian. She's funny. She had a guest on our podcast. Our podcast are the Kate Quigley, she's a comedian, she's funny. She hosted the adult video awards show and she started dating a porn star.

And people are like, oh porn star, she's like, listen, the actors in Hollywood are probably having as much sex as the porn star. The only issue is I can't ask about his day. I was working today and she's like, that was the part. Double penetration, right? Or like, double anal. It was a great one. Did you do well?

Right, but I think how do you do with it? I mean, I think it's hard enough, you know, thinking about their ex's sexual history and past lovers. And this, to think about this is what she's doing all day can be really challenging, but he knows what he's getting into. And I just think it takes a confident, secure, strong man to deal with it. He's probably not going to get it. He's not going to get a lever job.

Yeah, you have to understand, you know, is the job being in the sex industry does not mean the job itself is sexual. And you sort of have to figure out where that line is drawn and how that sort of manifests itself in your relationship or possible relationship. Right. And they have to have great communication. I think he's got to keep talking, make sure he trusts her. You have to have like, you know, relationship you need communication, but like solid trust Keep working on talking about it, but I don't my only advice is that you got accepted because that's the profession that she's chosen

You're not gonna change people as they want to and again you have to on a much milder basis. You have to deal with it Right. Oh, I do all the time and which is funny because I wasn't like when you get to porn I think you think like this is gonna get to porn, I think you think, like, this is gonna be a thing. I didn't think this was gonna be like my thing. And now it's like sex with Emily. And it is, that's another thing. Not only have I not been married, all that other stuff.

And then I've got a sex show. Well, I even have to deal with it. And, you know, doing the great love debate people, if I'm on a date, they're like, is this research? Are you asking me because you care? Like, are you gonna put this in a book? Like, do you? I say both. I go, I'm curious about you

and I'm also curious on a broader scale. I want to, you know, sometimes I like to know people's opinions on stuff. Right, exactly. And it's something I'm interested in and if you're going to date me, you have to understand where my curiosity's lie. Right. And a lot of my curiosity's lie in the dynamic between men and women. That's the deal.

Right. I agree to people. I think some people want me to talk in a weird way, but I change their names anyway. But yeah, I mean, it's a thing. If you can't handle it, you can't handle it. I think that's all we got time for. It is.

OK, so it is. Yeah, unfortunately. OK, so we're going to be at the great love, the live sex live. Love and sex live at the improv March 10th at 730 Go to Hollywood improv dot com for tickets or my website secrotele.com or your great update dot com Yeah, and also at great love debate on Twitter and Twitter Instagram Okay, and I'm at secrotele Emily and Facebook Twitter snapchat

Instagram what else YouTube listen and subscribe to the great love debate podcast that's not sectioned Emily and Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, Instagram. What else, YouTube? Listen and subscribe to the Great Love Debate podcast, or also on Adam Corolla Network, or podcast one, or iTunes, or any place you're going to find your podcast. So yeah, we're all podcast, let's all listen to each other's podcast. We should listen to Menace, the Woody Show, and your at Menace. At Menace on Twitter and Instagram. And the dog is, a lot of people are falling my dog sure. Yeah, she's got like a famous. Yeah, I'm getting a dog But we'll talk about this in the next I know all right

That's a clip. Hey everybody. Okay, everyone Thanks so much for listening to sex with Emily was the good for you email me feedback at sex with Emily calm Okay, everyone. What was your New Year's resolution this year? Did you want to learn to cook, stay in shape, get in shape? And how's it going? It's March, okay? Let's talk about it. Well, texture can help you see it through.

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