Sex With Emily - Episode 318 - Carnal Confessions

Episode Date: October 18, 2011

Emily reads carnal confessions from the SWE Treasure Island Music Festival Booth. Apparently, most people like it in the butt. Emily and Menace discuss if it’s ever okay to  use a coupon on a first... date. Also, Social networking sites that can help get you laid, dating younger men, why you should say yes to every invitation, Sesame Street gets sexy, and having sex while skydiving? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 I Look into his eyes They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex Eyes that block our secret institutions Betrubized they call them in a bygone way hey, Emily You got a boyfriend because my man E here. He just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute The girls got a hair stand. Oh my the The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common all the way? What do you mean like laundry?
Starting point is 00:00:27 It's shrink? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god. I'm so, so, so. Being bad feels pretty good. You know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily.
Starting point is 00:00:39 We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between for more information. Go to sexwithemily.com. We get all your sex questions answered because we've got so much information there, we've got shows, we've got we've got blogs, we've got polls, we've got so much going on there. So check out sex family. Thanks everyone for becoming friends, benefits, members. We love you, we love you, we appreciate you. And today's show is going to be awesome because it's all about your confessions. We had this amazing booth at the Treasure Island Music Festival this week and we hundreds of people came and filled out these little tags and they were blowing in the wind on this grid that we made.
Starting point is 00:01:13 Everyone confessed to us, minus some dirty, dirty things. I know they did. I don't believe some of the stories that I heard. I know, right? Kind of ridiculous. Do you ever confess anything? I never did. I never did. Okay, we're gonna get to we're gonna get into that We've got your emails. Got some polls. We got stuff. How you doing today? I'm good. What's going on with you? I'm really good
Starting point is 00:01:32 Yeah, it's exciting. I'm busy and I'm good the book is selling well and people my books just came out in stores on October 11th, I think I hot sex over 200 things you can try to know you can order on Amazon or buy it your local bookstore Hopefully it should be in bookstores now. Yeah, I haven't gone into a bookstore yet and looked at it Like I know it's like Barnes and Noble and stuff. It's just right there on the shelf. Yeah, I'll totally do that I've been busy. You got to do it. I'm too busy Very excited now. I'm not too busy. I'm never too busy and Good and I think something you're talking about for the show like I About me like going out more with guys and asking them out.
Starting point is 00:02:06 I think that would be a good mission for me in life. It would. I actually just had a thought. You know how you sent your interns on speed dating? You should do, I am going to go speed dating. You should do a speed dating. And I'm going to date online too. I'm going to decide that I'm going to do a match profile.
Starting point is 00:02:22 What? And I'm going to do a, I want to know your, uh, what you're going to do. And I'm going to go speed dating. I'm just going to match profile. What? And I'm gonna do a, I wanna know what your, what your purpose is. And I'm gonna go speed dating. I'm just gonna, I'm gonna ask guys out on dates. I've never asked a guy out in my life.
Starting point is 00:02:32 Do you think that'll be funny? I think it'll be totally funny because you know what, I'm just gonna promote the hell out of the link of your message. No. And I'm gonna have everybody just message you on.
Starting point is 00:02:42 Making fun of me? No, I'm just like, oh, just FYI, Emily's on me. No, I'm just like oh just FYI Emily's on me. I know at a real date though. I want real date. Yeah, it'll be a real date Because you they would have to have some communication with you and then you yeah, and I'll be like if you're a friend of men It's no friends of men. Why my friends are awesome We've talked to many of my friends. I met a lot of your friends speaking at the festival. They were really nice my friends are cool I met a lot of your friends speaking at the festival. They were really nice. My friends were cool
Starting point is 00:03:09 Where were the ones that totally ditched you because you guys were acting ridiculous because we were dancing at our booth Which was awesome? What the hell you did just You were drugged or wasted drunk white girl wasted. I wasn't at drunk But my some of my interns might have been drunk. I don't want to say I did ply them with alcohol by mistake No, it was awesome It was all bad is was awesome. It was all bad. It was all bad? No, yeah. It was super fun.
Starting point is 00:03:28 We did our live show, which we're going to air next week. The live show that we did at Treasure Island, we're going to play next week. It was hilarious. Yeah, you guys were in that mode where, how can I describe it? Just think of maybe drunk. I'm not saying you guys are drunk right? I'm just saying you're acting maybe like you were drunk
Starting point is 00:03:48 Of just like white girls in Las Vegas You're talking about you're the music festival everyone was like that You're just too cool, man. It's and you're too like I'm not just too cool. You're just trying to be like oh Is annoying girls are annoying. You're not gonna get dates if you're like annoyed by everything that women do. We're talking about. I meant way cool, like a ton of cool people. Cool checks. Do you get any digits? No. I didn't ask for any digits. Right. Of course not. I'm sure they were to get them to you. Ask them.
Starting point is 00:04:16 Totally. Totally. Anyways, I do. I have this. Let me tell you something. I've been totally nerding out on Tumblr, this website. Oh yeah, I know Tumblr. It's been around for a long time. Yeah. It's actually, it's based out of New York.
Starting point is 00:04:31 All the cool kids are on Tumblr. All the cool kids. It's like, I would say the blog for hipsters, right? And I've been really getting into animated gifts, which you might not know what it is, but it's like pictures that like kind of shake and move around, right? I just think they would be fun because I found this app that I can do them. And they're hugely popular on Tumblr. Animated gifts. Animated gifts. Like how you could give a gift on Facebook? No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:04:57 That kind of thing. Okay, what do you mean? It's a, it's a, I just told you a photograph. It's a photograph that shakes. It's photograph that shakes. It's like, it's really old school like vintage online stuff. Okay, got it. So I really got into making these because I get in really like cool situations that I can make really cool ones. And they're popular on that website.
Starting point is 00:05:16 And why for two days straight, I've been trying to figure out how to put that gift on the Tumblr website, like properly. Right. You can assess. I know that's like, like you're like obsessed with figuring out. Yeah, like I got it on the website.
Starting point is 00:05:31 It was cool, but this one little part was bugging me and it took me two days. I was up to like 11 o'clock last night. Did you do it? And I finally got it this morning when I don't even get in. I want to see it. 5 a.m. Okay, so it's a gift and you have a Tumblr site now.
Starting point is 00:05:46 Like should people check it out? Yeah, they want. If they're into Tumblr, it's whitemenist.tumblr.com. Okay. And yeah, I just can't believe it. I just say, well, you can share a bunch of things, right? I can share a lot of photographs. Like, you know, because I'm really into photos.
Starting point is 00:05:58 So it's really big into photo sharing. Okay. So that's why I decided finally to get on it. So you've been obsessed for two days. I've been obsessed with it for two days. And that's why I decided to get on it. You've been obsessed for two days. I've been obsessed with it for two days and that's why I don't have any sex stories because I've been geeking out online. Otherwise you'd have so many sex stories. But. Right. Otherwise you'd just be. But really super cool hot trendy girls that I know all have Tumblr accounts. Really? That's why you're on it. So it's in a way you are setting yourself up to get laid right now by being all have Tumblr accounts. Really? That's why you're on it.
Starting point is 00:06:25 So it's in a way you are setting yourself up to get laid right now by being on a Tumblr account. Oh, I like your Tumblr, you know? I like your Tumblr, Ravy. Because I've met a girl off every single social network. When you say I've met a girl off every social network, do you mean that I've met a girl and we banged? Yes.
Starting point is 00:06:42 Oh, okay. You've been laid from social networks then. Yeah, for sure. Starting with my space. Yeah, but I've never been on a dating site. Me neither until I do a match. I think match are okay, Cupid. What do you think I should do? Both. Double my chances. I'm noticing with okay, Cupid. It's like people people in their mid 20s are okay OKCupid and then people that are on match are 30 and above. OK, got it. So I mean, if you want to, you know, hang out with the youngsters, no, I don't know what I'm going to do.
Starting point is 00:07:11 A younger gentleman, OKCupid. Yeah, OK, I'll see what I can do. That's actually the founder of OKCupid's going to be on the show in a few weeks. Cool. Yeah, Sammy again. So maybe you should try to go out with a 21 year old guy and see how that is. That'd be hilarious. I could teach him so many things.
Starting point is 00:07:26 Okay. Yeah. Can you hold the conversation with a 21? Probably not. No, I can. Of course, my interns are all like that. I'm so young. I seem like I'm 21.
Starting point is 00:07:35 I act like I'm 21. What do you think a 21 year old guy would do and take you out on a date? What he would. Where would he take me? Where would he take you? I have no idea like probably know where you would be impressed with it would be like no it would be a
Starting point is 00:07:49 reservation he wouldn't take he wouldn't get reservations it would be some restaurant opening like Olive Garden where's he gonna take me I don't know some are classy probably like red lobster or something I like to love red lobster when I was little in Michigan I was like daddy can we go to red lobster because I love lobster when I was little in Michigan. I was like, Daddy, can we go to red lobster? Because I love lobster when I was like eight. And they have delicious cheese biscuits. Yeah. I don't know where you did maybe like,
Starting point is 00:08:11 I don't even think that they date, they date people out in 21. Do they go on dates and stuff? Yes, they do. They go on the movies. I could go out with like a 25 year old getting that'd be okay. What's 20 something, you don't really go to dinner either go to
Starting point is 00:08:27 and bar i think you'd be all about drinking yet you go to bar you go to a movie that's about it movies are bad for states you and i disagree on this don't you like movies on first dates i'm a no-first date movie chick movie so i want to talk to you or not talk to you don't want to figure it out i want to waste three hours to next to someone I'm never going to see again.
Starting point is 00:08:46 Movie's okay if there's an event before the movie. You can't just I pick you up, we go straight to the movie and then and then I take you home. That's that's a waste of time. Okay. Well, I don't know what this 21. I think I should try to date all different ages. I think this is going to be a really good thing for me to put myself out there. I'm going to find a 90-year-old guy for you to go. Thanks, honey. That's sweet. No, I think I should just be a really good thing for me to put myself out there. I'm gonna find a 90 year old guy for you to go. Thanks, honey, that's sweet. No, I think I should take older younger age. She's only a number, age is only a number.
Starting point is 00:09:10 What? Yeah. The things he could teach you. Exactly. No, about the Civil War and stuff. You're hilarious, Nams. I think if I did online, you should do online too. We could do it together.
Starting point is 00:09:20 Yeah, I mean, my only... I'm trying to think. I know a of girls that are aren't okay keep it and my guy friends I have one guy friend who is a craigslister Which I do he finds chicks and Craigslist like casual encounters Has anyone tried to cast one counters? Have you ever tried it where you like you're like I want to get laid in five minutes And I'm just gonna go to Craigslist and're like, I want to get late in five minutes, and I'm just going to go to Craigslist and see someone else who wants to get late in five minutes.
Starting point is 00:09:47 That's, I have a friend who used to do that all the time. Years ago, casual encounters was, and I think it's still like that. On Craigslist, you could just kind of say, I'm in San Francisco, I'm at this place, like let's meet up in an hour. I'm like, you're going to get like 3,000 emails. Yeah, and you just get, like, he used to hook up a chick
Starting point is 00:10:01 so he didn't even know like an hour before and they would meet up in it's some neighborhood or a bar and then see if they want to do it. And they do it. And then they go home. It's all about that. It's like, I'm feeling horny. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:13 I was living with my buddy and he had this really big thing about going on Craigslist, finding chicks and just meeting up and talking with them, and then leaving. Like not having sex with them at all. Like I've gone with them before I'm like you're crazy. Why? He just wanted to meet them? He didn't want to. He didn't know how to go to the next level. He was like the kind of like F with them. Right. But he would go to the extent of meeting up with them and talking with them, and then not doing anything with them That's weird. That seems like a waste time. We want to we want to do this
Starting point is 00:10:49 He would just do it for kicks kind of a waste of time. I don't know why right we met up at this hotel once With some chick and he went to the hotel room and he like Went to talk to her and I ate the free cookies and the lobby and it was delicious cookies by the way So I love free cookies. It wasn't a waste of time because I got cookies Right, but he went up to hotel room with a girl and didn't do anything didn't do anything who is this person My friend he's crazy, so he got girls into a hotel room a girl into a teller room or stuff and then didn't do anything Didn't do anything. He would just talk to him and then he'll leave you winner friends Just kidding. This guy's better than taking a It's better than taking your hands off someone.
Starting point is 00:11:25 Actually now. Well, what was the point that he's successful with women or successful in life? Both, yeah. Cool, if I usually go ahead and hand him. Maybe he was just using that as a practice to talk to women. I think that people, if we're talking about dating, is that you, it is practice.
Starting point is 00:11:38 Like, I think you shouldn't turn down any date and you shouldn't turn down any job interview either. That's how you learn how to interview and that's how you learn how to date. So you don't say no to it. You're listening to this and you're single and you're like, I can't find anyone. We talked about this a few weeks ago. Don't say no to anything.
Starting point is 00:11:51 Say yes. Say yes to every invite you got. Just say yes. Well, I like to do it. Meet new people. There's so many of you out there and I don't want anyone complaining. There's no one to date in your study because there is everywhere. I've talked to my buddies about, don't just talk to the women that you want to hook up with.
Starting point is 00:12:05 Talk to the friends, right? Well, talk to friends or just talk to you just women in general. Yeah, even if you're not attracted to the woman talk tour. Yeah, just the practice. Yeah. It's a muscle and you have to exercise it. Your dating muscle is a muscle. That language is that the way you move, the way you speak, the way you exude confidence.
Starting point is 00:12:22 When you're talking to someone, if you want to pick someone up up It is good to have just practice talking the opposite sex and it's good to know geography Like seriously because this is always my opener. Oh hi nice to meet you. Oh, where are you from? You use a name of state something and then I will name something that I know about that state That'll be a conversation piece and then it just leads from there. You know something about every state very Very impressed. What do you know about Michigan besides me? What would you say about Michigan? I'm like it doesn't really get that cold out there. Oh, that's easy. Okay. Yeah, but that's good I'm like, oh, well, I go how in the winter how how cold does it get right? Really cold, you know, I lived here in California. Hold life. I'd never have never have to deal with that yeah that's a good opener I like it's so easy I'm like really it was really really
Starting point is 00:13:11 cold I wish there were cute guys like you there to keep you warm I get it I get it it can flow it can flow yeah very rare somebody will stomp you with a state how do we like uh then we like Rhode Island and you're like I have nothing. Rhode Island. Rhode Island? Rhode Island is easy. Oh okay. I go do the guys are they really like on the Jersey Shore do they really look like that out there? But that's not Rhode Island is it? Are they from Rhode Island? This is the general area. Oh kind of. Kind of like that. Not really. It's near New Jersey. Nice. New Jersey shore.
Starting point is 00:13:43 Jersey shore. Right but it's the Jersey Shore. Where is Roy? It's a little north. It's not too far away, is it? Well, it's not too close. I wouldn't actually do that. That would not be your furrowed island. Anyway, and then you'd correct me and I'd go, oh, I go, well,
Starting point is 00:13:55 teach me a little bit. Yeah, then they think that something was wrong with you. Why would they be something wrong? Because for what island, New Jersey, I mean, I guess they're close-ish. They're very close. OK. Got it. I'm going to Google they're close-ish. They're very close. Okay. Got it.
Starting point is 00:14:05 I'm going to Google how far away they are. I'm going to show that. Okay. I just don't think of them being similar at all. It would be people. How are they known as the New Jersey? Jersey Shore is just whatever. I don't know. Okay.
Starting point is 00:14:16 Listen, if anyone wants to call us or leave a message and we will play your message or your questions or whatever, you can leave us a message at 415-9927-392. And 415-9927-392, leave us a message anytime you want and we will play your message for you, and we will play them on there. Okay, so we're doing a giveaway and we've had a few people write in about this, but we still need to, I've got my book, Hot Sex, Over Two and a Things You Can Try Tonight. We're giving away a few copies and we want to hear from you got my book hot sex over two and a things you can try tonight. We're giving away a few copies and we want to hear it from you. Why does your
Starting point is 00:14:48 sex life need an improvement? Why do you need this book? Because it is a book, two and a things you can try tonight. It does have really easy little things you could do to like shake up your sex life, mix it up, make it better. And so I think that you should write me feedback at sex.me.com. Why you think you deserve a copy of this book? And we will perhaps give you one. Are you going to go to Comic Con? that come why you think you deserve a copy of this book and we will perhaps give you one are you going to go to comic on tony because the illustrations are just
Starting point is 00:15:08 and the illustrations are crazy cool when when is on when is comic on it's not still a summer lie yeah yeah I will go with you go are you gonna go yeah I'm going alright dude we would have fun at a festival I wouldn't drive you crazy like the other day I'm serious and then we have the results to our latest poll, which was somewhat disturbing. Okay. How would you rate your current sex life? Only 9% said mind blowing. 17% said no complaints here.
Starting point is 00:15:39 21% said I satisfy myself. 23% said at least I'm getting some. And 30% the most percent, the highest percentile says, what sex life? 30% of our listeners, what sex life? They're not having sex life. The 9 30%? 30% that's the high zone. Yeah. Are you looking at a map still can you find word island yeah because main new hamster romant messages connective rod island new york new jersey
Starting point is 00:16:10 pennsylvania merrill and delivered to your west virginia north karnas south karni Georgia florida and i i just remembered i just remembered the guy on jersey shore is from road island okay perfect there you go so i am correct your correct your always correct minus i'm sorry if i ever doubted you. So 30% is what sex life? I'm sort of like out of all the choices at least in good and so what sex life? People are not getting laid. What? What do they mean? What sex life? It doesn't mean that they're to whist someone
Starting point is 00:16:37 and they're not having sex anymore. Now, I think you should flip it around. I think you should flip around this poll because it is disturbing. I think the next poll should be, why do you think you're not getting laid? And they go, I don't talk to anybody, I don't go out. That's good. I have communication with people. Smart sometimes. So smart.
Starting point is 00:17:00 I'm ready to tell you it's all the time. Because you're so much smarter than everyone else. You're smarter than everybody. That you're not. OK, we have a new poll. Not even one dude is too late. What? Where is your favorite?
Starting point is 00:17:13 This will be next week's poll. Where is your favorite place to have a cookie? Alleyway, elevator, airplane, car, or bathroom? If you had to have a cookie, we could put an office in there too. Maybe I'm just thinking. All the way, elevator, airplane, car, bathroom. Where would you have a cookie? If you had to have a cookie.
Starting point is 00:17:36 I've only had a cookie in two of those places. That's pretty good. I'm gonna be a car in a bathroom, that's it. Would you prefer? Car, car's always easy. Yeah. Car. Okay. I would like to have a cookie. I've had a cookie in an elevator in an alleyway. Never on an airplane in a car in a bathroom. I've done all of that. I'm so impressed. Okay. I'm such a classy chick. In the alleyway. In an alley. I think I'm sure I've had sex in alleyway.
Starting point is 00:18:06 I mean, I don't know if I've had full-on intercourse in an alleyway, but I do think I've definitely hooked up somehow. Some guy felt my boobs or something like that. I won't point in my life. I'm sure. Sounds like it's going to happen. I didn't give Pheleshune an alleyway. If I gave you Pheleshune alleyway email, feedback at sites of alley.com. I don't remember. I Shoe an Alleyway. If I gave you Philly Shoe an Alleyway email me feedback at sitesandalley.com.
Starting point is 00:18:27 I don't remember. I'm sure it was awesome. Amazing. I am awesome and amazing. We can get into some sex in the news. Okay. Alright. Oops.
Starting point is 00:18:37 There goes my hair clip. Okay. Nearly one in five US adults report that they have used a coupon on a first date. You can't use a coupon on the first date. A coupon or a coupon. Don't do it. Okay. Is frugality the new sexy?
Starting point is 00:18:52 The current state of the economy makes affording extravagant dates more challenging. A new element has been introduced to the dating game when your date uses the coupon to play the bill. Despite the stigma that coupons have carried for years, using coupons and dates is no longer frowned upon according to a new survey from coupon cabin. Of course, coupon cabins are going to say that, a leading online coupon site. The survey found that one in five adults have used a coupon in first date, but nearly
Starting point is 00:19:16 73% of respondents reported that if their date used a coupon, they would stay in the date and go out with them again. Wow. I tweeted about this, actually. I remember what last remember what I was talking about a year months ago. I'm like fellas, you cannot use a group on on a date. Maybe you can surptitiously slip it to the waitress and if I didn't know about it, I'd be fine but I think it's just a little weird to hand to flip a whip out a coupon. I don't want to know don't
Starting point is 00:19:41 they don't take me to that place for dinner. Save your coupons. I'm a gold digger. I'm a gold dinner. Save your coupons. I'm a good no save your coupons for the next days I would rather go and out to a park what oh a man saving money is not attractive a man saving money on the first day It's not attractive. It is not it's not hot. It doesn't give you a boner like doesn't turn me on. Oh, you're using your coupon It's not hot. So you're saying all women are doing for gold i you say that baby i'm not saying that but um coupon cabin did pull so let's just say they're trying to push their own thing they have their own agenda but um but i did tweet this out
Starting point is 00:20:16 and what you would you hear about that what people say um it came back 98% agreed with me but they said by the third day it was okay But third day to use a third day use a coupon But the third day you just keep your coupons to yourself people like can you find a way to like go to the restaurant early Like I get saving money on a date with you At the gold digger I know you can it's just not hot. It's not hot. What? Don't let me see it. Give it to the waitress surreptitiously. Like pass it to our the waiter. Um, that's how I feel.
Starting point is 00:20:56 Have you ever used to keep on a date? No, you don't even have to keep on. You get free stuff all the time. I don't need to do that. I don't need to do that because I get free movies and I go to be concerts and hang out with chicks. Don't get their digits or get laid but I still hang out with them. If I didn't have that opportunity then you know I'll figure out ways. I'm guys figure out ways all the time to get discounts on stuff but they don't let chicks know about it.
Starting point is 00:21:22 Don't need to know about it. Too much information. Don't even tell me. But what about it? like you guys aren't looking for sales every five seconds. What's the problem? We are looking for sales. Yeah That's a double standard right there. Well because what kind of coupons? I guess it is all three like group on hour whatever you get like by one stick at stick I don't even know places to take you but I don't eat it places to take coupons That's the problem. Wow. I don't eat it places to take coupons. I don't think. You're just digging yourself in a hole right now.
Starting point is 00:21:48 I never I mean, I'm not. I'm just saying if a guy takes a day, I don't ever use coupons. No, I do use coupons at shopping outlets shopping. You don't go shopping for food. I know. I don't shop for food. You don't shop for food. I would use a whole foods coupon if they set me one. But not at the restaurant, whatever. You take your list, it's going on. Right, you haven't even used a coupon a day. You don't know what we're talking about. Okay.
Starting point is 00:22:12 Because I honestly, because I'm unfortunate that I get hooked up on a lot of stuff. So I don't. So you look like the big swing in the big balls kind of guy, whatever they say. I'm really not, you know. Right. I don't care how guys do it. You look like a baller. You look like a baller. I knew that wasn't right.
Starting point is 00:22:29 Okay, a mask for your man. The world is made up of two types of people, spitters and swallowers. But the spitters and swallowers are at least one thing common. They're all tasters. And sometimes when you're getting down to business, well, things don't taste great. That's where mask comes in.
Starting point is 00:22:42 M-A-S-Q-U-E. It's a revolutionary intimacy enhancement product that has been signed to Figgy formulated to conceal the sometimes unpleasant flavors associated with oral sex on your man and the subsequent climax. Wait, it's for the man. It's for the woman. So she, it's a paper thin gel strip, available in chocolate, strawberry, and watermelon, that absorbs onto your tongue prior to giving head, which then can seal the taste of your man's spunk for 15 minutes. It's like giving me...
Starting point is 00:23:09 And after dinner, pre-blow job, you might call it. That's funny. Okay. It's like bonacca for your penis. Exactly. It's bonacca for my mouth, so I don't have to taste your penis. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:23 It's a gel strap. Did they have mint? Did they say mint? They've chopped, lit, strawberry, and watermelon. Why not, man? Because mint gives some sense, since I've been... That's when you suck on the altoid. Monica Lewinsky did with Buck Clinton, so she said.
Starting point is 00:23:35 Right, I've never actually done that, I don't think. Like, have you ever had a woman do that? The mint on your penis that makes it feel good. I've heard that it does. I'm sure it does. I've had a mint condom once and it felt crazy good. Crazy good. It's tingly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's the altoid trick we're talking about is when you suck on the
Starting point is 00:23:51 an altoid or a mint and you perform all sucks in your partner. And it feels tingly good. Yeah. I don't know why this dumb company didn't think of mint. It should be the number one. Because it's women and they're like chocolate, water, melon, strawberry. Like that's what women like. Like women eating more chocolate in their life. Right. We do though. Okay. Sex well skydiving is a thing people do now. No way. Sex well skydiving column of pioneer and skydiving sex.
Starting point is 00:24:18 Pornstar Alex Torres has done the dirty well skydiving. His female partner Hope Howell. Hope Howell happened to be the the receptionist at Sky Dive Taff, the Sky Diving School, which hosted the event. The Sky Diving Sex video shows Torres and Howell having sex in a plane before making the leap, a running start, so to speak. He works as a part-time sky diving instructor
Starting point is 00:24:40 in addition to filming porn, posted the video on his personal website and hopes for attracting the attention of Howard Stern. But he quickly took it down when he learned that the Federal Aviation Administration opened an investigation on the pilot. Apparently, it's illegal having sex in the seat next to a pilot. Wow. And sex in the seat?
Starting point is 00:24:56 He did it so he could get on the Howard Stern show and apparently the FAA called him and said it's illegal. Yeah. It's sex. At one point, the video shows a couple having sex and a scene next to pilot behavior that could affect his or her ability to concentrate and find the aircraft, which is in violation of FAA regulations.
Starting point is 00:25:12 Or how do you even find the law? People are so dumb, I don't know. But apparently, he's not going to get a hard start, and he would just make it a ticket and get in trouble. But I don't know, they really, and it sounds like hope, how old, that sounds like a porn star name too. But the two of them at sex,'s X just pictures of it on the interweb you can find it. That's really cool That's really cool sex while you're skydiving. I would not want to do that I would rather just skydive or have sex, but I wouldn't want to mix them together. It's a can't be that good. I guarantee they have this thing
Starting point is 00:25:39 I mean now I wouldn't mind it Virgin Galactic or I think a lack, it's the Virgin America is gonna have flights where you can go into space. No way. The next couple years, yeah. You haven't even heard about this? No, that should be sex in the news.
Starting point is 00:25:57 It's about like a bedroom that you could just... No, I'm saying you can, it's a trip that you go in a space shuttle and you go up into space and you're like, Oh, I, okay, yeah. I thought you meant that the virgin airplanes are gonna have rooms that you can go into and have sex during flight.
Starting point is 00:26:14 No, but I'm just saying. Which is not a bad idea. Which is not a bad idea. No, but I'm just saying, which is not a bad idea. Which is not a bad idea. No, but I'm just saying, which is not a bad idea. No, but I'm just saying, which is not a bad idea. Which is not a bad idea.
Starting point is 00:26:22 Which is not a bad idea. No, but I'm just saying, which is not a bad idea. Which is not a bad idea. Which is not a bad idea. Which is not a bad idea. Yeah, somebody did that, right? Where they had sex in space. They were trying to conceive in space or something like that. I think so. It's familiar. That would be messy. Right. I think it's all be really messy. Yeah. He'd like a fish net to catch things. Right. Exactly. But it's 250,000 per seat to fly on this, this, uh,
Starting point is 00:26:40 special. So somebody can just buy out the whole plane. Totally. I would buy about the plane and just that sex with one person and they should and they should sure i would do it done let's do it
Starting point is 00:26:52 okay all of the money soon but many many years from now attack of the killer vibrator abel bonjour of california bonjour of california who incidentally had a fantastic who incidentally has a fantastic, who incidentally has a fantastic porn star name, is suing pipe dream products claiming that their vibrator nearly killed her. No way.
Starting point is 00:27:12 She states that she was using the product in the manner intended when a sharp pain led to bleeding so intense she called 911. The poor thing required multiple points of blood, pints of blood upon arrival, and her son, both her and her son were fearful the injury would kill her. It occurred last November, she's seeking damages to the amount. She probably did something wrong with the vibrator. They don't kill you of $25,000. Well, let's see, it just teaches you
Starting point is 00:27:36 that you shouldn't use sex toys. Yes, you should use sex toys. You should use sex toys all the time. Sex toys are awesome. I told you about this friend of mine who came up, we had this friend, but this queen, so I met her at the festival, and he he was like my girlfriend needs to use a vibrator like don't they run sex drugs? Oh, I did run into some people some comms to be nameless that actually work in the same area as The sex with Emily office. Oh, and they want me to drop by sex toys to their office
Starting point is 00:28:03 Wait, wait, they've seen my office? No, but their office is in the same area as yours. Oh. And they're like, yeah, you know, can you guys drop off a gift pack? What do they want? I don't know. OK, well, I've got lots of sex toys in my office.
Starting point is 00:28:15 Cool. Lots of Jimmy Jane. Jimmy Jane is amazing. They just sent us the most beautiful, amazing sex toys they have, like the Form 6. What else do they send us? Like the Form 3, Form 2, the little rabbit. I kind of agree. They have amazing sex toys. have like the form six what else they send us like the form three form to the little rabbit I kind of they have amazing sex toys jimmy jane dot com we gave we're we're gonna be announcing on
Starting point is 00:28:31 Thursday the winners of our contest. We're gonna be picking out winners because at the treasure and festival We had like hundreds of I don't know five six seven hundred people enter to win jimmy jane toys and Copies I know people are going crazy for those crazy Jimmy Jane Toys and Kapi's I know people are going crazy for those crazy So this is a Muppet story Sesame Street hacking the latest hilarious Muppet sex weas Do you know this okay this weekend Sesame Street's YouTube page was hacked with pornographic content. That's so bad Don't hack Sesame Street. It was up there for 20 minutes Instead of being greedy with Elmo's latest song white letter
Starting point is 00:29:06 Q kids are welcome with the unrecognized classic first anal quest and Jolica. Yes, which presumably has educational qualities just how to fit things into other things and the importance of sharing Oh my god, I don't know. It's children, but I guarantee you there's no kids as all that. No, I don't think so Usually their parents are probably there if they're watching it. Yeah, okay So So that's what we have for this. They're not going to be able to search on YouTube. They're not on YouTube for Sesame Street. Right. They're not. Okay, but it's funny. Yeah. It's a good sex in the new story. Okay, I've got some emails. Okay, what do you got? So I got. Okay. Dear Emily, why does that are a free copy of hot sex? Which is my book. One, I'm 66 and my wife is 64.
Starting point is 00:29:49 She's hot and our sex is good. However, we are in the need of new ideas. We are stuck in the early 60s as far as the ways of doing it. I love your show, but listening is not the same as seeing. Your book sounds like it will help. We've been married for a long time and the fire is still flaming. Number two, you have a way with words and are so not judgmental. Oh, he's complimenting me.
Starting point is 00:30:07 Three, you know what works and what doesn't. Four, we lived in the same city in Michigan, Farmington Hells in the 70s, and we are still residents. I went to you of him by a different year. Five, I would be so excited. I have an autograph copy of your very first book. I know more will come. Six, I'm a faithful listener.
Starting point is 00:30:21 Gary, he's a Farmington, he's from my hometown. Premium, friends and benefits member. We're gonna circle this circle this one I like it but we have one other people to enter they have until next week to write us emails he's not the winner yet but he might be he's in the running because he complimented me complimented me tell me what you love about the show no why you need to copy about sex is your sexist but he also he's been with his wife and they haven't updated their sex life since the 60s. And you know what, a lot of people have an update of their sex life since then,
Starting point is 00:30:48 or since they've been with someone for a year, they haven't done anything different. They've done, do we have these like the same way? Why you laughing at me? I'm just laughing about... With me or at me? I'm laughing at you. Oh.
Starting point is 00:31:00 Thanks. When you do get on match or okay, keep it. I am gonna find a gentleman and all that are gonna do is Confirm she's the entire time and then you'll go on a date with them and I'm gonna laugh because I'm secretly Don't don't tell them that it's not as mysterious me dating in line is a very serious emotional thing that I've never done before And for you to to rig it in a way that's gonna make it not authentic is really her time feelings It's hurting my feelings. I'm just taking it seriously. No. I don't know about that. Some guy compliments you without meeting me. That's not
Starting point is 00:31:32 go you look hot in your picture. That's lame. You can't compliments me on there. Think it's a you're a good writer. I love the dress that you're wearing in a photograph. No, that's not the way to my heart. Eventually, but not on the first email. I currently am on a vineyard and I would like for you to come try some wine with me. And then you're going to email me. I'm not telling you what I post on my ads because I'm not even sending a link and I'm changing my name because I don't want any of your shenanigans involved with my future of my dating life
Starting point is 00:32:06 I would find you the love of your life, but you know, you probably just if you were gonna find me love my life Why don't you do it now and then I don't have to date online if I found you love your life you wouldn't even see it I'm just saying why I'm just saying you think that I wouldn't notice love of my life if he came up and hit me over the head Yep, I don't think you would see him. Why? Because I'm so not so jaded. I'm not jaded. So jaded. Not not. Like a song. Hey Emily, I listened to your 10, 7 episode my birthday, by the way, where you requested
Starting point is 00:32:39 or listeners to write about why they love needed the hot sex book. My wife and I have been together for 10 years. The first five were extremely passionate. It was like having sex with a porn star. Great body, she deep throats, opened to try all types of positions. However, after time passed, we started having sex less and less. We recently went three months without having sex. I'm losing my mind. We finally talked about why we're going through this drought. And she said it was because she feels discriminated against my bi biology.
Starting point is 00:33:05 She's jealous of men and wants to enjoy sex so much as I do. I'm working really hard to learn how to please her. And I think your book at help. Love the show, Dan from Columbus, Ohio. Well, first off, tell her to stop being a whore. Why is she being a whore? She's awesome. But time passed, having sex and let they went three months without having sex.
Starting point is 00:33:24 He needs the book, book to just like Gary I'm gonna have to I'm giving out several copies. These are all both compelling arguments. I know I want to get everybody a book So I wish I could give everyone a book what I do this. I know he needs it to But this depressed me because they used to have things like a porn star or she was like So porn star now they go three months that having sex they need my They need my book. 200 things you can try tonight. They need a digital virgin so you can give out digital copies. You and your digital virgins. Yeah. Virgins. I love some digital virgins right now. This is so funny. These people are off from Miss Neckerson from Michigan too.
Starting point is 00:33:59 Okay. It's all people from your hometown. No, this isn't from my hometown. It's all dudes that you went to high school with that masturbate to the show. I wonder if they do because they do email me a lot of dudes from high school, email me, and ask me questions. See, this is what's going on. And it's funny because they're probably listening right now. It's a bunch of dudes that I went to high school with
Starting point is 00:34:19 that wanted to sleep with you. And now they're married and they have kids, and so they secretly, they're listening right now, they're secretly downloading the podcast, and then they go masturbating the dark in their house. You think? Totally. Come on, you're hilarious. I don't think so.
Starting point is 00:34:37 I don't think so. I don't know. I don't think so. How many of them hit you up on Facebook? A lot. They're like, hey, saw your article. The kids are just big article in the district. My town paper, a few weeks ago. How many of them hit you up on Facebook? A lot. Yeah. They're like, hey, I saw your article, the cause there's this big article in the district, in my town paper a few weeks ago.
Starting point is 00:34:47 How many of them are single? None. None. How many women hit you up from your hometown? A lot. A lot. Said they saw it, but a lot of. How many of them are single?
Starting point is 00:34:57 None. No one's single about me. Yeah. I swear, I'm the only single person left in my entire high school. Did they talk about meeting up sometime? No, this one guy was like, how do you separate your life from your work life
Starting point is 00:35:08 and your person? Like he was asking me questions about. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You think he wants to be me? Yeah, guys aren't interested in that crap. Yeah, guys aren't interested in that crap. Menace, some men are. No, they're not high.
Starting point is 00:35:17 They just want to sleep with you. Oh, I don't think so. Every guy will sit through a boring conversation so they can have sex. Seriously. That is so depressing menace every guy will ask you 15 dumb questions so you can feel like you're important I've didn't got no You're so you're so jadal menace. I'm not you're so jaded. It makes me sad. I'm sad. No I'm not jaded because I'm the one that actually believes in love and finding the the one that you can spend the rest of your life with. You don't believe in any of that crap. So you are the one that is J. I believe it can happen. I'm going to go on. Yes, I do. I do believe it. I do believe that you could find the one. You could totally find the one. But once you find that one, I want to be able to have sex with other people. That's not me. That's be speaking for you. I would like to have sex. It's going to be hard to have sex to just one person. But I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to have sex with other people. That's not me.
Starting point is 00:36:05 That's me speaking for you. I would like to have sex. It's going to be hard to have sex to just one person, but I think I'll have a unique relationship with one person, but then we'll see what happens. Who knows if it happened? What have? Okay. My husband of three years has lost interest in passion and sex with me already.
Starting point is 00:36:23 It's been over a year since we have even touched each other. He has a history of getting bored with his lovers and I thought I was different when I married him because we do so much together otherwise. When I try to talk to him about, he always blames way too gained or medication as an excuse. I just don't have to talk to him about anymore and it's making me become even more distant. That's what drives him crazy. He's telling you what the problem is and you can't take it from that. That's what drives me crazy. He's telling you what the problem is. And you, you can't take it at that. Guys do that all the time when women try to ask what's the problem. And then the guy tells them what the problem is. And the women don't believe
Starting point is 00:36:54 them. They're like, no, it could be something more. It has to be something more. No, he's telling you what the hell is going on. And you're not listening. It is true that if a man gains weight or he's taking medication or he's insecure, going through bad times, he might not want to have sex. So don't feel her head that it's something else. It's not something else. Why don't you let me finish the email? Because I know you're like, oh,
Starting point is 00:37:15 you don't know anything about anything. OK, I just don't know how to talk to him about anymore. And it's making you become even more distant with him. Yeah, because you're driving him crazy. This is my second marriage. it depresses me to, when do you tune it? You just quiet down. It's my second marriage and it depresses me to think I'm in another relationship feeling
Starting point is 00:37:33 lonely and unloved. I'm a passionate person, I need to feel passion and purpose in my life. I just don't know what to do anymore. Any advice we appreciate is from Patricia. She's from Shelby Township, Michigan, which is actually near where I grew up, but not too close. That's so weird. Okay. He has history of getting bored with his lovers. Okay. So let's get a break this down. Husband three years lost passion and sex already. He tells you that he has gained weight in his own medication medication. I don't know what medication he's on, but that really
Starting point is 00:38:02 could be why. What? Paxle. Maybe if he's on anodity present, that could be why. What? Paxle. Maybe if he's not an antidepressant, that could be why. If he's not any kind of type of blood pressure medication, that could also be a reason. I would tell him to get checked out because that's his excuse. But what's he going to do about it? Is he joining Jim?
Starting point is 00:38:16 Does he go to his doctor and check the medications? Make sure that sometimes you can flip medications and take something else so it doesn't affect your sex life? So he owes it to her to do that as well. Like to say I gained weight and I'm on medication so therefore I'm not going to have sex with you is not going to salvage the marriage. It's not going to salvage it at all. So he's got to start taking matters into his own hands. That's penis unless he's been mass-rating to watching that's why he doesn't want to have sex. But I think you're right that she should believe him that it is because of his weight gain, his medication, he isn't feel sexy and the medication can be affecting him in some way.
Starting point is 00:38:48 But I think that she should talk to him about how he's feeling, but it might make him more frustrated because if he truly believes, if he, let's take him on his word, it's weight gain and medication. Has he joined a gym, has he talked with doctors? And I think that we have to look at that stuff. You could get a copy of my book and spice it up.
Starting point is 00:39:04 But no, I think that it sounds like three years is not, I mean, you guys could go to therapy. Therapy is a great way to talk about your sex life. You could see a sex therapist. If he's adamant, that's what it is though. I would just go with his word and see what he's doing about help him. Maybe he needs your help. Be supportive. Say if you want to go to the gym together, let's go for a walk. Let's not buy that extra pine upon Ben and Jerry tonight. It's so good. It's so good though.
Starting point is 00:39:28 I want the Ben and Jerry's. But it is true that men and women when they gain weight or they don't feel as good about their bodies and themselves. But it sounds me they've only been to get a three years. But I wouldn't tell yourself that you say he's a history of getting bored of his lovers. He married you. I wouldn't say that just because he's a history,
Starting point is 00:39:44 because women do this and men do this too. But I know as a woman, we create scenarios like maybe it's because he's bored. It's like he was before. Maybe it's just it really could just be waking in a medication, not that it's he is a history of his stuff, but we need to look into this more. Yeah, they need to talk about it. Okay, that's what we got time for today for the emails, but we do are going to get not, not you, like, chose not over yet, baby. We're gonna get into confessions. So we had this confessional booth at the Treasure Island Music Festival this weekend, which was awesome.
Starting point is 00:40:12 Like I said earlier in the show, and it was a grid that people could, we had these little luggage tags, and people could write their confessions, their fantasies, but it ended up being a lot of confessions. And it was very, a lot of people were really digging it. They, like you said, they were like, let me do this let me do this the cathartic it feels good to confess something And so we wrote down some of the
Starting point is 00:40:30 There's a lot in here top confessions that people did they're really funny and interesting entertaining and I Thought it'd be good for them to read them all right Thank you for them But first you know what leave a confession is like the history of confessions And catholicism the sacrament of penance is the method of the church in which people confess their sins and have them absolved by the priest. So maybe people were feeling absolved by like confessing, like they felt the way that they were
Starting point is 00:40:53 being like releasing themselves. If they were carrying any burden or any guilt or any heaviness around their, around this sex act they did, they were confessing it. This traditionally conducted with a confessional boot box or booth The sacrament is known by many names including penance reconciliation and a confession For the Catholic church in church the intent of the sacrament is to provide healing for the soul as well as regain the grace of God loss
Starting point is 00:41:16 I said I don't mean to go all But that's the history of it, right? We did something a little different in our confessional at treasure on music festival People are mostly anonymous and running their confessions and it was intended to be a cathartic experience We're experienced we were celebrating and we appropriating sins and sexual deviations and displaying them for the world to see That's how we did it. It almost felt like An art piece and I it was not peace It is and we just hung it on the wall in my office. It's beautiful
Starting point is 00:41:43 Yeah, it was almost like some piece of like modern art It was crazy. I know and I hate that crap You hate my I know is thank you. Yeah, well my interns all did it. We all came up with it And I think he can't really well. Okay, here's some confessions ready. What do you got? I F'd in my deans back yard pool That's a good deal of a school the first person I slept with was named Emily. A lot of people you were saying yesterday came to the booth because they were sleeping with Emily's or they know Emily's or they slept with Emily's. I want you to sit on an antel while a girl on an
Starting point is 00:42:15 inflatable shark licks cool up off my chest. All right. I just lost my virginity two days ago. Sweet. Love it. I write about butt plugs. Okay. No one might know that. Fantasy, this is a fantasy. Sex and a bed, bath and beyond. Any section we'll do.
Starting point is 00:42:35 Bed, bath, ion makes it turns me on too. I love bed, bath and beyond. Yeah, that's a beautiful place. I actually use coupons at bed, bath and beyond. And I have no problems with that. Oh, so you use coupons? What's wrong with the man using a coupon at a restaurant? Yeah, sexist. I don't take any. There's no restaurant. I've we've got to the bottom of it.
Starting point is 00:42:51 I don't go to restaurants that would accept coupons. Okay. Eight people. This is more fantasy or confession. I don't go to restaurants that take keep on. You hate me right now. Eight people in a room. Two girls and six guys. I was a girl. Wow, that's hot. Eight people. That's actually sounds like an orgy to me. I've cheated on my last four boyfriends with my ex. Oh, that's a classy girl. So I'm gonna take home. I ended a walk of shame and a homemade snow-weight costume in front of a packed yard party. It wasn't Halloween. Oh, no. I
Starting point is 00:43:22 of a packed yard party, it wasn't Halloween. Oh no. I lost my virginity while cutting class on top of the roof of the classroom. That's awesome. That's good. I like that one. Received oral sex at a Denny's under the table. No, that's class.
Starting point is 00:43:37 That's class. You probably take coupons of Denny's. Yeah, they probably do. For the Grand Slam. But you would never know what Denny's looked like. I've been to Denny's in college. I once gave my boyfriend a hand job in the back of a cab with my family member in the front seat. That's dirty, dirty, dirty.
Starting point is 00:43:56 I'm sleeping with my friend's sister. Oh, that's good. That's okay. I cut a hole in a catalogue. I get a kid. I read this one the other day. I cut a hole in a cantaloupe I get a kid I read this one the other day I cut a hole in a cantaloupe and heated it up a heated up in the microwave And and ended up burning my penis so bad the skin peeled off
Starting point is 00:44:12 Yeah, I don't he tried to after the can't a lot Yeah, I always guess you really weren't warm, but how long do you put it in there? You should be really careful when you cook things in a microwave You should always do it less time than you think. And you should have tested it first. And he put on just penis. I burn, I burn, I burn myself. And I never learned my lesson.
Starting point is 00:44:33 Well, you want to know this because you don't want to use a oven. But, you know, you have those frozen pizzas. You put them in there and you cook the pizza. And it looked delicious and you're ready to eat it. And you let it cool down everything and Then you bite into it and the sauce is still a thousand degrees Really the hell out of you. Oh, I don't know this. This is a frozen pizza. How would they not perfected the frozen pizza?
Starting point is 00:44:57 I don't know. I don't know Sounds awful good to know so if you want to have a pizza too, you should be careful It's all be careful. Oh You will burn your penis totally off. I actually have a frozen pizza on my refrigerator. I'm just never made it. My freezer. It's probably a thousand years old. It is a thousand years old. Okay, more confessions. I've never had an orgasm. That's the best field cathartic for someone to write that on the spa. Okay, hopefully you'll have one soon. I've effed my ex-boyfriend the same number of times since we broke up as when we were together. I
Starting point is 00:45:26 Can relate to that. I've date I've slept with an ex longer than I actually dated them. Oh That's good. That wasn't mine though. I like having sex with scary Halloween Max masks on. That's fun. You like having sex in your teletubby. Oh, yes, anything Awesome. I've bef friend at a furry on Twitter. You did? Yeah, I don't know if it's a guy or girl though. What do you mean? That's a furry that has this crazy authentic looking lion costume.
Starting point is 00:45:59 OK. I mean, it's awesome. When the mouth opened, it's like recorded sounds of a lion. It is really good. Okay. And I met this lion at the blink when I two concert. And then I took a picture. And then I that lion found me on Twitter and I tweeted the picture. And then now being the me and the lion talk. But you don't know if the furry, I don't know if people have sex. Well, yeah, they dressed up in
Starting point is 00:46:28 Maybe like kind of mascot type outfits or even some are pretty authentic looking like the ones I'm talking about and they have sex in In the outfits right it was it became really popular mainstream culture I think when MTV did a Document and it was like all over everyone was talking about it. Okay, got it. But. So you're friends with the furry and you don't know if it's a male female.
Starting point is 00:46:49 I don't know if it's a male or female. Are you getting anything out of the friendship? No, but I get awesome photographs. I was like, please tell me when you're out of concert again so I can take a picture. That's awesome. Because actually you know what, it's a saved with tooth tiger I think.
Starting point is 00:47:03 Okay, it's okay. Furry's furry. I can't make up. Yeah. Are you sure that they were furry? Like they said, he said, like he wasn't just dressed up because since everyone just go, people dress up all the time. Yeah. No, no, it says furry on the profile.
Starting point is 00:47:15 Got it. Okay. So it was really cool. That is really cool, minus making friends all over the place. I don't think that how do you sex with the cost? Do you just do the four play with the cost? Like, they have have little openings. They have openings.
Starting point is 00:47:26 Yeah. Like I've already cut out the penis of the totally doubt. Yeah, so I can stick my penis out of it. Are you going to do that? No. We should have sex in it. And then report back and confess it on the wall. We still have the confessional wall in our office.
Starting point is 00:47:40 So anyone who comes into our office has to write a confession. That's a rule. So I have to have sex in the teletoby outfit. Yes. I'm sure that would happen by by Halloween. By next week. You wear it enough, you're going to get laid on it. I'm going to be so wasted. What are you going to do? I have a concert the night. So, but the new thing everyone that comes to my house has to put on the tubby outfit. That's fine. We've talked about that. Right and so last time I had
Starting point is 00:48:06 A chicken and it was pretty funny. That's hilarious And then another chick was like on top of her and we were like taking photos Oh, that's hot. You're making little homemade porn. Yeah, and then she was pretending homemade furry porn Then she was pretending to do another guy in the butt while wearing the tele-tubby outfit. It was good times I'm sorry. Instagram. So white nests on Instagram follow me. I'm gonna get, I'm getting an iPhone this week, I think. Please do. It looks finally.
Starting point is 00:48:29 And they'll be an Instagram. Okay, I don't have sex. I make love. I confess to blowing a male to female tranny in a 78 dots in L.U.S.U.V. behind the Disney store in 98. Yeah. That is not true, but it's funny. How do you know?
Starting point is 00:48:44 Huh? How do you know it's not true? That is so descriptive like that. That's it's funny. How do you know? Huh? How do you know? It's not true? That is so descriptive like that. That's to be that's to be funny. Okay. I don't know Yeah, I actually don't think I've had the best sex of my life yet someone said. I don't think I have either Are you serious? Yeah, I don't think I have I don't think I've had the best day of my life How he's like stuff like that is the worst conversation. Oh, yeah I don't know you met as a lucky tell anyone. Tell me how many people you slept with. There's no one's listening. I don't know. Not many. Okay. I've had sex on my head. Master's lawn is an active defines against my boarding schools administrator. Lots of people having sex
Starting point is 00:49:17 on their schools, their deans back yard, the pool and the backyard or whatever. How are you really sticking it to the man by doing that? I don't know. It must feel just like, yeah, like an active defiance actually. That's not really an active defiance. I don't think headmasters lawn doesn't know. They're young. I said headmasters young in boarding school. You're like 17. Yeah, but they're like, oh, you it's like spitting in so much food. They'll never know like if you're a waiter or waitress and you like, yeah, it's kind of like in so much food. They'll never know like if you're a waiter waitress and like, yeah, it's kind of like that. Actifize fantasy putting a plunger on a boob and plunging. Okay.
Starting point is 00:49:52 That would hurt on my breast. I often Irish man. I just met who was visiting America in the Harry Potter closet. I still don't remember his name. What Harry Potter closet? What's Harry Potter closet? I don't know. Okay.
Starting point is 00:50:05 Don't know that one. The best sex I ever had with a stranger. That's interesting. They always say, I wonder if you get the best sex. You always want to know, like, is the best sex of your life with someone you know or it can be what is the best sex of your life? Can you, can you point to it like the best side? They say you never marry the person the best sex with. No, that sucks. I don't think that's true.
Starting point is 00:50:25 That's how I'm holding out. I've never orgasm, but I will never give up. Love that. I'm at 28 and after many years at my fair share of boys, I finally had my first one night stand last night. Madam here, nice. Treasure Island. Someone had, yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:42 Why, you think that's bad? No. I heart my form six, which is a Jimmy Jane toy. We're giving way Jimmy toys. They love the form six. Form six is awesome. My head tattoo magic wand is my favorite lover. That's another great vibrator. You can buy it at meneve.com. Go to go to Adam and Eve, put in cuban, go to Emily, you can buy that tattoo magic wand. It is the MacTruck of all vibrators. I asked a frapp boy with a strap on, I stole from my ex girlfriend.
Starting point is 00:51:11 Why is this keep on coming up lately? What? We're like girls wearing strap-ons on guys. Because we're going to actually talk about that and show that we're going to do shortly. But it's easy to be coming up a lot more lately with who with me? With that scenario. Like people. Strappons. Strappons.
Starting point is 00:51:31 Talking about that. Where a girl, where a strap on and like do a guy. It's common friend here. She wanted to do. She's coming back on Thursday. Yeah. Yeah. She did. She did buy a strap on. That's really common. A lot of men want to be penetrated in Lee. And but they don't even know that they want to but do you want to kind of no i don't really good your prostate all that feels good to me i'm you think you should try it
Starting point is 00:51:54 just once but what what do you mean it's coming up a lot like in your circle friends who are like so i was a little stimulated last night what do you mean i just people talking about that scenario of a strap on with a strap on with that. Yeah. Yeah. I see it in, um, in media and stuff like that. Okay. Yeah. Because it's it's common. I think it's. Is it common? I'm more common. It's more common than you think. Have we got an email from somebody said that I, uh, I have a girl. Sure. We have. Yeah. If I know a lot of guys are into it and a lot of guys are afraid of it.
Starting point is 00:52:26 We're actually having guests on the show, Jell and Rex, who's going to talk to you's gay and he's going to talk more about that about a lot of straight men don't want to have anal sex, don't want to be analizpennetrated because they think it'll make them gay. They don't like that. They don't like that. Yeah, they'll think it makes them gay. Okay. So we're going to talk about that.
Starting point is 00:52:42 Okay, we've got to go. It's our time. Our time is up. Cool. Thanks everyone for listening to Sex with Emily. It was a good for you. Email me. Feedback at sexwithemlee.com.

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